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Dave McClure's presentation at StartupDay 2010. Video can be found after October 5th on www.Seattle20.com/tv http://www.seattle20.com/startupday
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Why NOT To Do a Startup
Dave McClure500startups.com
Master of 500 Hats
Startup Day - Seattle, Sept 2010
@DaveMcClure
#1: You’re a WANTrepreneur.
You’re in this for all the Wrong reasons: Because it’s Cool. You want to make Money. You have Teh Awesome Technology Solution. “They Can Never Take Away My Freeeeedom!”
The Right Reasons: You Live in Fear. You Can’t Get Laid. Something has been PISSING you off FOREVER.
YOU ARE PASSIONATE ABOUT [SOLVING] A [CUSTOMER]
PROBLEM
#2: You are a FAT and LAZY SLOB
You’ve worked at Microsoft for >5 yrs.
You Drive a Nice Car & It’s Paid For.
You Live in a Big House.
You Don’t Worry About Paying Bills.
You Want to Kiss The Kids Goodnight.
You Your Spouse > Your Startup.
#3: You Have a BUSINESS PLAN,But No Product and No Customers.
See: “Startup Metrics for Pirates”
#4: Your Idea SUCKS(and even your Mom thinks so)
You Don’t Have a Working Prototype.
Or Worse: You Do, But No One is Using It.
It Sucks a Lot More than the Competition
See: “Lean Startup (Ries) & Customer Development (Blank)”
#5: You Have Teh Awesome SOLUTION…to a PROBLEM that does not exist.
See: “Your Solution Is Not My Problem”
#6: You’re a LOSER, not a LEADER.
You Procrastinate.
You’re not Charismatic.
You Get Beaten Up
Your Vision is usually Wrong.
You’re Scared of Change.
When Other People Tell You You’re Wrong, You Believe Them.
Watch: “Kick-Ass” or “Glee”
#7: Your Pitch Sucks & You Won’t Raise Money
(or SuperAngels Collude to Screw You Over)
50 slide deck
Technical Jargon
Demo FAIL
Clueless Investors
EVIL Investors
See: “How To Pitch a VC”
#8: Your Team Sucks, and You Have No Idea How to Hire (or Fire).
No Technical Founders / Coders
No Design / UX / Usability Exp
No Internet Mktg (Search, Social)
No Enterprise Sales / Biz Dev
#9: Yr CoFounders & Employees = Whiners.
You WILL miss a payroll.
Someone WILL eat last slice of pizza.
There WILL be Politics.
People WILL discover and compare salary & stock options.
Someone WILL sue you: Sexual Harassment Wrongful Termination Unhappy Customer Jealous Competitor
#10: You Can’t Sell or Market Shit.
You Don’t Know Marketing.
You Think Marketing = PR.
You Don’t Know what SEO stands for.
You Think SEM = SEO.
You Don’t Know or Use Social Platforms (Facebook, Twitter, YouTube).
You’ve never built Facebook or iPhone App, or a Social Game.
You’ve never sent an email campaign.
You’ve never done affiliate marketing.
See: “Startup-Marketing.com (Ellis)”
#11: You’d Rather Change the Channel Than Change The World
Wouldn’t you rather be watching GLEE or MNF?
Sure you would.
Fuck. That.
Noise.