101 Things to Do at Wal-mart!!

8/3/2019 101 Things to Do at Wal-mart!!

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101 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling themand stranding

them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front ofthe store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervalsthroughout the

day.

4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can getto join in.

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all thespray air

fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes ofgift wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW,especially thin

narrow aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, Ithink weve got

a Code 3 in Housewares, and see whathappens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all offand turn the

volumes to 10.

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, Hi! I havent seenyou in so long!

etc. See if they play along to avoidembarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, askyourself loud enough

for all to hear, Who BUYS this junk,anyway?

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.


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16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim youretaking it for a test

drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying aboutfive feet away.

Continue to do this until they leave thedepartment.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire storeas your playing

field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, lookmesmerized

and say, Wow. Magic!

20. Put M&Ms on layaway.

21. Move Caution: Wet Floor signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others youllonly invite

them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch fromthe other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run aroundsaying,ImBatman. Come, Robin, to the Batcave!

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell helloupside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask,Why wont

you people just leave me alone?

30. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hiredemployees if there are

any in stock, i.e., Do you have anyShnerples here?

31. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scalebattlefield with


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G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

32. Take bets on the battle described above.

33. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

34. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme fromMission:

Impossible.

35. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) whilesqueezing your legs

together and practically yell at him Ineed some tampons!!

36. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

37. Try on bras over top of your clothes.

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Say things like, Would you be so kind as to direct me toyour Twinkies?

41. Set up a Valet Parking sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: Marco Polo.

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the petfood aisle, etc.

44. Re-alphabetize the CDs in Electronics.

45. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to therestrooms

46. When someone steps away from their cart to look atsomething, quickly

make off with it without saying a word.

47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker,assume the fetal

position and scream, No, no! Its thosevoices again!


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49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines andrelax. If the

store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explainthat you dont get out much,

and ask if they can put a littleumbrella in it.

51. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voicepossible sex

and candy

52. Try putting different pairs of womens panties on yourhead and walk

around the store casually.

53. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of themannequins.

54. Nonchalantly test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

55. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, runbetween them,

yelling, Red Rover!

56. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirrorwhile you pick

your nose.

57. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes.(Red lipstick might

give an interesting effect!!!)

58. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenlyask the clerk if

he knows where the anti-depressants are. Actas spastic as possible.

59. While no ones watching quickly switch the mens andwomens signs on

the doors of the rest room.

60. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watcheveryones jaws drop

when you attempt to buy them.

61. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look withvarious

funnels.

62. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browsethrough, say things


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like the fat man walks alone, and scarethem into believing that the clothes

are talking to them

63. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with youand get into a

very serious conversation. Ex: The person isbreaking up with you and youbegin crying How could youdo this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew

there wasanother girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed MEdarling. Then

act as though you are being beaten and fall ontothe ground screaming and

having convulsions.

64. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check peopleout.

65. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store andbegin stroking it

lovingly, saying Good girl, good bessie.

66. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair ofshoes, not

putiing one pair back. Take the paper from theboxes and throw it in various

aisles.

67. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

68. In the makeup department, spray yourself with everyperfume there is,

then walk up to a boy who is with anothergirl and start flirting with him in

that annoying, ditsy way.hi!!!! (giggle) Whats your sign?(giggle). When

the boyshows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way.hi!!!!

(giggle) Whats your sign?(giggle).

69. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoplescarts when they

dont realize it!

70. Walk around the perfume department with a bottle ofsuper strong

perfume and spray people as they walk by. Leanin and sniff them then jump

back and wave your hand in frontof your nose and saying Oh god, your over

powering theperfume!!

71. Hit on the elderly.


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72. Hit on 5 year olds.

73. In the food aisle, pretend like theres a little bug, slowlymove your head

to the right, then swing your head to the leftas if your trying to follow it.

Slowly lower your head to theground, then start spinning around in circlesstomping likecrazy. Then finally yell out Yes!!! I got it!!! Wow, that wasthe

biggest Cockroach Ive ever seen, i think it was pregnant!!!Hey look, theres

another one!!! Then Repeat.

74. Repeat 73 with a can of bug spray.

75. Crawl around on the ground and pretend that your a cat.Meow when

people walk by, rub up against their legs, etc.

76. Ride around on those electric cars and pretend that your aprissy English

Man. Say things like Cheerio, good man. topeople who walk by. And dont

forget to have perfect posture.

77. Start grunting like Beavis and Butthead while chasing yourfriends up and

down aisles trying to run over them with thoseelectric cars. Make sure to tell

your friends to act like theydont know you.

78. Spend all your money riding on those little rides fortoddlers. Fit the

character; if your on a hoarse, then pretendthat your a cowboy, etc.. And If a

little kid comes overwanting to use it, start barking at them untilthey run

away crying.

79. Have silly string fights with a friend. Hide behindcustomers and

accidentally hit the people instead of yourfriend.

80. Excesively use anything thing that says Try Me.

81. Start pocketing any and all free samples.

82. Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins.

82. Walk up to the customer service and when they sayHello, how may I

help you? say Yes, Ill have a QuarterPounder with cheese, one strawberry


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shake, a large order offrench fries and a diet coke. And when they start to

talk, sayOh, to go. Then when they say that they cant give it to yousay

Oh, This is because Im gay isnt it? Id expect this fromCaldors, but not

Walmart. People who are gay are just likeeveryone else your know. You

digust me Then walk awaymumbling to yourself. If your a guy, try to act as

valley- girl-like as you can

83. Start to madly scratch yourself and walk up to peopleasking where the

rash cream is because your family and allyour friends seem to have a rash

too.

84. When your alone, have loud conversations with yourmultiple

personalities. Have an English man, a Southernperson, someone from New

York, a Grandma, and a 5 year oldgirl all at the same time. You have to use

accents. They shouldsound like this: Great idea good fellow, we shall have a

jollygood time.(English) Look, oall I wanna do, is wok taStawbucks and git a

cawfee(New York) Etc.

85. Start dancing like mad. Basically, just wail your armsand legs around

like your having some kind of massiveseizure.

86. Try on crazy costumes and walk casually through thestore.

87. Stick your arm in your jacket and suspiciously start toleave the store. Get

really tense and start to lean over as yourwalking through the doors As if

your suspecting the alarms togo off. Then when it doesnt go off, let out a big

sigh. Thenquickly look around you to see whos watching and run awayas

fast as your can.

88. Balance EVERYTHING you see on the tips of your finger,your nose, your

forehead, and the top of your head whilesinging the circus song.

89. Put jockstraps in the lingerie department

90. Put lingerie in the mens department.

91. Put super sexy lingerie in old mens carts when they turnaround.


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92. When your alone, start screaming help and yelling thatsomeone is trying

to rape you. Then when everyone runs over,start crying and saying All I

ever wanted was a littleattention Then run away crying.

93. Spend hours staring at a little blinking light. After a while,start sayingblink every time it blinks. Dont look away, juststay mesmerized.

94. Walk up to a lady and calmly say Help me. The voices inmy head are

telling me to do naughty things. Then clap yourhands over your ears, fly yell

head around and start screamingNO!!! I DONT WANT TO HURT THE NICE

LADY NONO NO NO!!!! Then suddenly stop, look her straight in theeyes, and

Calmly say Iwill starta fire The pull out azippo and start laughing

hysterically in an evil way. But dontlight the zippo, just hold it closed.

95. Light a match under a sprinkler.

96. Walk up to someone and say Oh, so your back for more. Iwarned you

never to come back here. Wait here while i go getmy shot gun. Then walk

away.

97. Walk up to a guy and say Oh my gosh, is it you? Oh mygosh it is!!! I

havent seen you in so long!!!! Then kiss him.Then slap and him say Why

didnt you ever call me?? Thenwalk away. Much more affective if youre a

guy.

98. Stand next to a maniquin and pretend that your amannequin. Try to hold

the same position for as long aspossible. Then finally as someone is walking

by, check yourwatch and say. Finally, my shift is done. I really dont getpaid

enough to do this

99. Start singing oldies songs in to megaphone.

100. Act like your about to cry and ask people Have you seenmy mommy?

101. Steal a Walmart shirt. The possibilities are endless.

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101 Things to Do at Wal-mart!!