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Basic Personal Competencies for Teachers, Counsellors, Supervisors− A Training Programme
Table of ContentsBasic Personal Competencies for Teachers, Counsellors, Supervisors − A Training Programme..........1
Preface...................................................................................................................................................11. Introduction: Educational competencies of teachers..........................................................................22. Basic Dimensions of Education and Counselling: Empathy, Acceptance and Congruence...............33. Active Listening...................................................................................................................................74. Giving and Receiving Feedback.........................................................................................................95. Cognition, Emotion and Behaviour...................................................................................................136. Counselling as a Problem Solving Process......................................................................................157. Dealing with Conflicts.......................................................................................................................188. Personal Prerequisites of Education and Counselling: Self Awareness, Self Esteem, Self Efficacy (Identity).................................................................................................................................21
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Basic Personal Competencies for Teachers, Counsellors, Supervisors− A Training Programme
Improving Teacher Education at Jordanian UniversitiesJointly funded by the European Union and the Government of Jordan
By Dr. Eva Burchardt and Ralf SchiebuhrChristian−Albrechts−Universität zu KielErziehungswissenschaftliche Fakultät
Olshausenstrasse 75D 24118 Kiel
Deutsche Gesellschaft fürTechnische Zusammenarbeit (GTZ) GmbH
Preface
Within the framework of consultancy commissions in the EU−financed project (Reimbursable TechnicalCooperation) concerning teacher education in Jordan on the theme “Guidance and Counselling”, the ideaevolved of combining the wealth of individual themes dealt with to form an overall training programme.Counsellors are employed at the larger schools in Jordan to tackle “difficult situations” and to providesuggestions and advice, as well as practical tips. Conflicts and crises at schools, between parents and theschool as well as within the school administration, are to be dealt with at an early stage by preventivemanagement and should be solved as far as possible before they escalate and the police authority orsupervisory body has to be called in.
The training programme under review takes into account the fact that successful educational activity in schooland out of school calls for personal competences, as well as technical and method−related skills. However,such personal competences are rarely taught in training. The fundamental personal competences which e.g.teachers should possess are:
• a differentiated self−perception: they should have a realistic picture of themselves and beaware of their own strength and weaknesses, preferences and dislikes. Only in this way canthey work against projecting their own, sub−conscious views on pupils and counteract thedevelopment and consolidation of their own prejudices.
• sensitiveness: the ability to empathise with the points of view and feelings of the pupils. Animportant precondition for this is the ability to perceive oneself in a differentiated manner.
• communicative competence: the ability to express oneself understandably to a specifictarget group and to understand this group free of bias, to tackle misunderstandings, to assertone’s own concerns and rights, without violating the rights of others.
• the ability to solve problems and manage conflicts: being able to respond appropriately tounforeseen requirements, even if no action routines are available, and to settle conflicts withothers constructively. An important precondition for this is communicative competence.
The need for these basic competences arises from the varied spectrum of tasks of teachers, othereducationalists and multipliers, which generally also comprises the fields of teaching, educating, assessing,advising and possibly innovating, as mentioned in the script, and always presupposes competent socialinteraction. Teachers and advisers are always important models for pupils, students and counselling clients,who develop and expand their social and personal competences in this way. Moreover good teacher−pupiland teacher−parent interactions are an important factor for preventing violence at school and other adaptationproblems.
The acquisition of these competences presupposes practice−oriented learning. That is why the training underreview here is restricted to relatively short presentations of the underlying theories and then focuses on
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practical exercises, on becoming familiar with and practising suitable behaviour patterns, on reviewing thesein real situations, and finally on running over the experience gained. The exercises will be carried out in smallgroups, observed by other participants, and will subsequently be discussed in the whole group and bereviewed for possible improvements. This procedure calls for two counsellors who have sufficient experiencein dealing with communication exercises and discussion techniques. In the Jordan project these were Dr. EvaBurchardt and Dr. Ralf Schiebuhr from the Faculty of Education of the University of Kiel. They designed andtested the training programme under review here and integrated the practical experience gained.
I would like to express my thanks to the authors for their work.Hubert Hartmann, GTZ − Education, Science, Youth Unit
This brochure should not be regarded as a book or a manual for general use, it is simply a conglomeration ofthe scripts, working sheets, and foils of the authors. Originally they were designed for a training course forJordanian teacher supervisors and school counsellors. Thus the intention is to give the reader an idea, whatcontents we regard as necessary for the training of teachers, counsellors or other professionals who want tofoster other people’s (and their own) personal development and ability to cope with the challenges of everyday life. Furthermore this brochure gives an impression of the methods used in our trainings. It must bestressed however that these materials are neither suitable for self study nor for use by trainers who have nottaken part in our introductory training.
1. Introduction: Educational competencies of teachers
If you ask yourself, what kind of help teachers and especially student teachers need to cope with their variousassignments, it is sensible to look at these various assignments first. What are the different fields of activity atschool?
• Teachers have to teach. They have to impart knowledge and competencies to theirstudents. They have to facilitate the students’ ability to understand and to find methods ofgaining and storing knowledge. They have to create an awareness of problems and strategiesto solve them. And they have to motivate the students.
• Teachers have to guide and educate. They have to help the students in their personaldevelopment and their self−determination. They have to develop their ability to act in a freeand responsible way. They have to make them ready to take responsibility for political andsocial affairs. They have to foster their self awareness and their ability to solve problems anddeal with conflicts.
• Teachers have to evaluate. They should try to come to an objective assessment. They haveto give feedback in a constructive way.
• Teachers have to counsel. Teachers have to counsel their students concerning theirpersonal affairs, their performance at school, their choice of career etc.
• Teachers have to innovate. They always should try to improve the working conditions in allfields concerning school on the basis of scientific progress.
In order to cope with these fields of activity teachers should develop an educational professionalism, whichconsists of the following components:
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Components of Educational Professionalism
The components of educational professionalism are not acquired completely during the studies at university,but they have to be developed by and by. This training programme focuses on the aspects of the professionalidentity (self awareness, self esteem and self efficacy) and the key qualifications (the ability to reflect what onedoes, to act and to cooperate successfully, social and emotional intelligence and communication skills). Inorder to deduce what is necessary for this purpose, we can refer to different theories: social learning theory(Bandura), cognitive theory of identity (Markus, Cantor, Kihlstrom), humanistic psychology (Rogers).
2. Basic Dimensions of Education and Counselling: Empathy, Acceptance andCongruence
There is broad consensus that there are certain attitudes, which are prerequisites of educational success.Rogers has described them as acceptance, empathy, and congruence.
Acceptance is the unconditional positive regard of others, as they are, with all their problems andidiosyncrasies, whereby it is not necessary to agree with their behaviour.
Acceptance as an attitude is based on the belief that there is a constructive force in each individual (the selfactualizing tendency), which is directed towards developing the potentialities of the person. This implies theconviction that everyone has the right to be and to feel the way he does, and the readiness to be interested inother persons, to appreciate and encourage them and to respect and foster their self−determination. (Rogers(1970):”I certainly feel responsible to the participants, but not for them.”)
From social−cognitive approaches to identity we know, that an important prerequisite for the acceptance ofothers is positive self−esteem.
The behavioural aspects of acceptance have many facets: To deal with persons in a friendly, caring, helpfuland considerate manner. To be reversible in one’s behaviour, that means to act in a way in which the othermight also act towards oneself (e.g. If you want a student to speak louder, you should use an expressionwhich the student might also use to ask you to speak louder. Not “Can’t you get your teeth apart!).
Another important point is, not to judge or interpret what people do, say or feel, but to try to understand theirpoint of view (to be empathic).
Acceptance also means to trust: to accept statements as true from the perspective of the speaker: “I willbelieve that you are telling me the way it is in you. I do not want to waste my time being suspicious or
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wondering what you ‘really mean’.”
Another aspect is to accept persons or groups in their present states of mood or development, not to pushthem to self disclosure or a deeper level of communication, because (even if one succeeds) this usuallydoesn’t lead to lasting results. Sometimes people even feel that their private self has been violated when theyhave been persuaded to give up too much self defence. On the other hand it is not forbidden to encouragepeople to exceed their limits a little bit in order to make new experiences and personal development possible.But it must be their decision and their responsibility.
Empathy is the ability to take other persons’ point of view, concerning their thoughts as well as their emotionsand to express this understanding. From social−cognitive approaches to identity theory we know, that selfawareness is a prerequisite for empathy, because we attain the cognitive structures for social perception bylearning something about ourselves (we’ll come back to that topic later on).
As an attitude empathy is closely related to acceptance and includes the readiness to concentrate on theinner world of the other person, on the background of knowing that not reality but the individual interpretationof reality explains the individual’s feelings and behaviour.
Empathy as a behaviour means to listen as carefully, accurately and sensitively as possible. The focus of theinterest is not so much on the specific problem, but on the meaning these experiences have for the personsand the feelings they arouse in them. So it is important to select the self−referent meanings out of the totalcontext of what the person says and preferably to respond to them.
Congruence refers to the correspondence of the counsellors thoughts, feelings and expressions (verbal andnon−verbal). That requires highly developed self−awareness on the part of the counsellor and the readinessnot to play a role or to hide behind a facade. It does not mean that he must express everything he thinks orfeels. The rule is: Everything you express should be true, but you should not express everything that is true,because what we think and feel is very complex, and we must try to distinguish what is more or less importantand what is more or less adequate and helpful in a current situation.
Congruence as a behaviour means genuineness, not plying a role, and being honest in what one says. Toadapt one’s behaviour to the different needs of different people does not mean playing a role as long as eachfacet is a real part of oneself(e.g. explaining sth. to people of different ages).
Congruence also includes being aware of the complexity of one’s feelings in a given moment, listening tooneself thoroughly and then choosing to express thoughts or feelings that are strong and persistent, or not toexpress them if that seems inappropriate at that time.
Further it means to trust one’s feelings, impulses, fantasies, perhaps to voice an occurring fantasy − not assomething true, but as a fantasy in oneself (e.g. seeing a shy little boy in a violent student). Often this brings asurprising depth of reaction and profound insights.
These attitudes and complex social skills can be learned most effectively by social learning processes, thatmeans by watching persons who behave in an adequate manner. Thus all educators are very importantmodels for young people as well as for their colleagues − and they should be good models.
The implication for our workshop is, that it is not sufficient to talk about desirable attitudes and skills, but thatthey must be trained. So we are going to do several exercises and to simulate social interactions in role plays.
When we are doing some more complex exercises now, we need not strive for perfection, because that wouldtake us several years. But we can gain some more awareness for helpful behaviour.
Acceptance
is the unconditional positive regard of others, as they are, with all their problems and idiosyncrasies, wherebyit is not necessary to agree with their behaviour.
Acceptance as an attitude
• the belief that there is a constructive force in each individual (the self actualizing tendency),which is directed towards developing the potentialities of the person
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• the readiness to be interested in other persons, to appreciate and encourage them and torespect and foster their self−determination
The behavioural aspects of acceptance
• to deal with persons in a friendly, caring, helpful and considerate manner• to be reversible in one’s behaviour• to try to understand their point of view (to be empathic)• not to judge or interpret what they do, say or feel• to trust: to accept statements as true from the perspective of the speaker• to accept persons or groups in their present states of mood or development
Empathy
is the ability to take other persons’ point of view, concerning their thoughts as well as their emotions and toexpress this understanding.
Empathy as an attitude
• is closely related to acceptance
• the readiness to concentrate on the inner world of other persons, on the background ofknowing that not reality but the individual interpretation of reality explains the individual’sfeelings and behaviour.
The behavioural aspects of empathy
• to listen as carefully, accurately and sensitively as possible
• to focus on the meaning which experiences have for persons and on the feelings theyarouse in them
• to respond preferably to the self−referent statements of persons
Congruence
refers to the correspondence of the counsellors thoughts, feelings and expressions (verbal and non−verbal).
Congruence as an attitude
• honestly being oneself, not playing a role or hiding behind a facade• to trust one’s feelings, impulses, fantasies• to be aware of the complexity of one’s thoughts and feelings
The behavioural aspects of congruence
• to be (selectively) honest in what one says
• to choose to express thoughts or feelings that are strong and persistent, or not to expressthem if that seems inappropriate at that time
• listening to oneself (to one’s inner voice) thoroughly
• to express an occurring fantasy − not as something true, but as a fantasy in oneself
Exercises:
Negative and positive aspects of personal characteristics or habits
1. Sometimes it is not easy to be acceptant and congruent, because each of us has some dislikes. And howcan we honestly appreciate someone who behaves in a way we do not like?
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Let’s do an exercise of self awareness first: Please write down which characteristics of other people or whichbehaviour patterns you do not like (anonymously, one on each piece of paper). We’ll give you 5 minutes.
Now let’s collect your notes and let’s have a look at the outcomes, can we cluster them?
2. As we all know (have seen) each of us have different aversions. That means that it depends on ourindividual perspective, whether a characteristic or a behaviour pattern is bad or not. Perhaps a little exercisecan help us learn to see the positive aspects of traits we don’t like. The trick is to find more positive words forthe same characteristic or behaviour, e.g. to say that someone works thoroughly and not ponderous (langsamu. umständlich). Let’s take some of your examples and try to find the positive aspects. (1 example, groups of5, find 4 examples). If you can’t find an English word, you may explain the positive aspects of thecharacteristic or behaviour in sentences, or find situations in which they are helpful (e.g. when you work in abank, it is desirable that you are very exact = pedantic). We’ll give you 10 minutes. Then each group is askedto present their examples.
What do we do with liars, thieves, aggressive persons? As we see, we cannot find a positive aspect of eachcharacteristic or behaviour. But in the case of characteristics, it is sometimes helpful (and usually moreadequate!) to describe the behaviour and not to assume a personal trait. It is much easier to accept (andperhaps understand) a person who has done something wrong (has told a lie), than to accept a person whohas a bad character (is a liar).
Role−play: to be acceptant
Make groups of four: Talk to a student who is often late.
Person A takes the part of the teacher/counsellor, B takes the part of the student
The two observers write down examples of being more or less acceptant and empathic (perhaps C can writedown the positive, D the negative examples).
Each group presents some positive and some negative statements to the plenum (just single statements, nota complete role play).
We’ll give you 15 minutes (or more).
Write down the positive statements on the left side of the board, the negatives ones on the right side.
Do we all agree?
Identifying acceptant/empathic statements
Please discuss which of the following answers you regard as more or less acceptant/empathic.
You exaggerate, it’s not such bad! That really worries you. But you must be aware of the fact that others have certain expectations. And you wish to get some help of him. I wished I could convince you that she is not such bad. You cannot expect that he knows what you need. So you’re in conflict with your brother. You are quite wrong in saying that she is thoughtless. She can be very considerate. For my part I don’t see any problem in that. You would just like to run away from everything. Don’t worry. You must not overestimate the importance of that exam. If I were you I wouldn’t know what to do, either. You should just be more self−confident! For my part I don’t see any possibility of changing that.
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3. Active Listening
An unprofessional dialogue between two teachers:
Ella: Hello Ron, can you spare a couple of minutes?
Ron: Oh, I’m just preparing my lesson, but tell me, what’s on?
E: I’ve got a problem with Achmed.
R: Oh, Achmed, A horrible boy! He always is late in my lessons. Talked to his parents already, but nothinghelped.
E: Yes, but my problem is: he never does his homework and the others even admire him for that.
R: That’s always a problem. Students always imitate the worst behaviour. I once had a classmate, who alwayswore a cap during the lessons. In my eyes he was a hero. But our teachers obviously had another opinion.
E: But I don’t want a hero in my class and especially none, who seduces the others to be lazy.
R: (sings) “We don’t need another hero!”
E: Oh stop that! I’m not kidding. It’s a real problem for me. He undermines my authority.
R: Rubbish! Such a good teacher as you are never loses her authority. Just talk to his parents and then it’stheir problem.
E: But you’ve told me you talked to his parents and nothing has happened.
R: Right. Give him detention and that’s it!
E: Yes, but that’s too much attention for him and it doesn’t really help.
R: It seems to me: you don’t really want help. By the way I must go on with my preparations.
E: I see, you’re a real friend. Excuse me for bothering you. I’ll never ask you again.
People often talk to each other this way. But talking this way is neither professional nor productive. The mostimportant and most difficult aspect of conversation is to be able to listen. So our first exercise will be theimprovement of our ability to listen empathicly. Thomas Gordon calls it “active listening”. To practice “activelistening” you should bear in mind the following rules:
1. Make sure that you have the time and concentration to have a conversation. If not, say soand suggest another date.
2. Listen in a relaxed and concentrated way. Pay all your attention to your partner!
3. Encourage him verbally and non−verbally (e.g. nodding your head, “I see”, “aha”, “hmm” −pedagogical grunting)
4. Admit pauses
5. From time to time repeat in your own words what you have heard.
By keeping to these rules you reach following objectives:
1. You satisfy your partner’s desire for acceptance.
2. You can make sure to have understood exactly what he has meant.
3. You encourage him to put something right, to think about it and come to further conclusionsand to go on telling.
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Now we’d like to give you an example, we recorded before. Afterwards you’ll get the dialogue on a worksheetas well. So first enjoy the amateur theatre−group! Afterwards work out the differences between thenon−professional dialogue and active listening!
A professional dialogue (active listening)
E: Hello Ron, can you spare a couple of minutes?
R: Oh, I’m just preparing my lesson. Give me five minutes to finish it, then I have time for you.
Break
R: Now I’m ready. Tell me, what’s the matter?
E: I have a problem with Achmed. He never does his homework. Today he told me he had forgotten it.Yesterday he told me he couldn’t do it, because he didn’t feel well. The day before yesterday he told me hedidn’t know he had a task and so on and so on.
R: I see. He always has different excuses, but you think he is lazy and that bothers you.
E: It’s not only his laziness, that bothers me. His classmates even admire him for that. Every time, whenAchmed brings one of his famous excuses, the others burst out laughing.
R: Hmm
E: I always could hit the roof. I’m afraid, if nothing happens, the others will imitate him and quit doing theirhomework as well.
R: I see. When Achmed brings one of his typical excuses and the others laugh you’re afraid that your authorityis being undermined.
E: Yes, that’s it! Though, when I think about it, it’s not the whole class, that laughs, it’s just a few of the boys,two or three.
R: Nevertheless you’re worried.
E: Sure. And I have to do something against it.
R: Hmm
E: Perhaps I should talk to Achmed’s parents.
R: Good idea!
E: Yes, this afternoon I’ll go to Achmed’s parents and talk to them. I hope that will help. And I think it’s theirtask to look after his homework, don’t you agree?
R: Hmm. You feel better now?
E: Much better. Thank you very much!
1. Exercise
Please form groups of four persons!
A tells about any problem or subject!
B practices active listening!
C and D observe the conversation.
After five minutes you stop the conversation and evaluate it the following way:
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A tells the others how he felt during the conversation. C and D give A a feed−back about the success and, ifnecessary, the mistakes A made. Afterwards you change the parts!
I’ll give you 45 minutes. So everybody once has the narrator’s part, once the listeners part and twice theobserver’s part
2. Exercise
Discuss in your groups
1. how to train teachers to listen actively!
2. how teachers can develop the students’ ability to listen carefully, accurately and sensitivelyto others!
Active Listening
To practice “active listening” you should bear in mind the following rules:
1. Make sure that you have the time and concentration to have a conversation. If not,say so and suggest another date.
2. Listen in a relaxed and concentrated way. Pay all your attention to your partner!
3. Encourage him verbally and non−verbally (e.g. nodding your head, “I see”, “aha”,“hmm”)
4. Admit pauses
5. From time to time repeat in your own words what you have heard.
By keeping to these rules you reach following objectives:
1. You satisfy your partner’s desire for acceptance.
2. You can make sure to have understood exactly what he has meant.
3. You encourage him to put something right, to think about it and come to furtherconclusions and to go on telling.
4. Giving and Receiving Feedback
Even for experts like teachers and counsellors it is important to think about feedback, because in theseprofessions we usually look at mistakes and deficits. If everything is alright, we don’t talk about it. That is notgood however from several points of view: from learning theory we know, that positive behaviour must bereinforced to be stabilized. From cognitive theory we know that we keep those things in mind which attract ourattention. So it is important to focus the attention on positive successful behaviour, because that makes thememory of this behaviour pattern easily accessible when it is needed.
And similarly it is important for the identity to tell people about their strengths, resources and positivecharacteristics to help them build up a positive self concept, high self−esteem and an internal locus of control(that means confidence in their capabilities).
For all these reasons it is not only important that educators are trained in giving (and receiving) feedback, butthis important competence should also be taught to children at school.
Feedback can be achievement related (or evaluative) and interpersonal (relational) But the rules are similar:
Feedback should be
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• specific: describe behaviours, avoid generalizations (words like “always”, “never” etc.).Caution: characteristics are often overgeneralizations of behaviour: “You didn’t do yourhomework” is better than “You are lazy”.
• positive: stress the positive aspects, point out the resources. “You have done yourhomework more regularly last week than before, please try to do it every day.”
• constructive: make suggestions for improvement instead of criticising (propose how thingscould be done better). “I see that you have trained your handwriting. Perhaps it would evenlook nicer if you used a pen instead of a biro.”
The person who receives feedback should
• just listen. It is important neither to reject compliments nor criticism. Sometimes it can beappropriate to give explanations or to agree.
• reflect what he has heard. Helpful questions are: Is the feedback congruent with myself−image? What can I learn from this feedback, how can it facilitate my personaldevelopment, how can it help me to do better?
But as we know people who receive feedback often do not appreciate it in the way I just described. Peoplewho reject feedback usually have three different strategies:
• they deny their responsibility (they do not attribute it to internal causes): In case of criticismthey might say “I couldn’t perform better, the tasks were too difficult.”
In case of compliments they might say “Oh I just look nice because you don’t wear your glasses.”
• they deny the adequacy of the feedback regarding the extent:
In case of criticism they might say “I didn’t hit him, I just pushed him a little bit, it was just fun.” In case ofcompliments they might say “Oh that wasn’t much trouble to prepare this meal.”
• they contradict the feedback:
In case of criticism they might say “I haven’t been absent−minded.”
In case of compliments they might say “Oh no, my hair looks terrible.”
In these cases it is important that the person who gives feedback expresses that she notices the rejection,insists on her point of view and asks the other person to think about it.
If the feedback concerns interpersonal relationships it is useful to insert information about ones’ own feelingstowards the behaviour:
“You have forgotten our date last week.That hurts me.Please try to be more reliable in future.”
This helps the other person to understand the consequences of his behaviour, and the feedback cannot easilybe rejected: When I describe my feelings, nobody else can say that this statement is wrong.
On the other hand it can sometimes be important to be ready for discussion. We must be aware that ourperception of a situation or behaviour is not always correct.
Therefore it is desirable to differentiate between description and interpretation of behaviour and possibly to beopen to corrections of the interpretation.
“You are looking out of the window all the time.
It seems to me that you are not interested in the lesson.”
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In this case the person, who receives the feedback has the chance to explain why he looked out of thewindow and whether he has listened or not. Or if we take an example concerning interpersonal relationship:
“When we met in the restaurant yesterday, you didn’t come to my table. It seems to me that you don’t likeme.”
In this case the counterpart might explain that he has just been too shy to join the other. I would like you to doan exercise that is also suitable for children:
A special form of feedback is confrontation, just telling my reactions, emotions, thoughts to the person:
“Seems to me you give each message three or four times, I wish you would stop when youhave completed your message.”
“Your coldness frustrates me.”
But judgements or diagnoses like the following are forbidden!
“You’re hiding a lot of hostility.”
“You are highly intellectual, probably because you are afraid of your feelings.”
Exercises
Differentiating between observation and interpretation:
Two people work together. A looks at B thoroughly and voices his or her observation and interpretation, e.g. “Isee that you are wearing glasses. I guess that your vision is not good − is that right?” B answers. Theobservations can concern such superficial characteristics as mentioned or the facial or corporal expression ofthe person (I see that you have many wrinkles around your eyes. I guess that you like to laugh a lot.) Thenchange your parts. (5−10 minutes)
Plenum: Please tell us about your experiences during this exercise. What was more difficult: to look atsomeone or to be looked at? Was it difficult to describe someone “objectively”, without evaluation? What didyou think when you had to describe and interpret a characteristic?
Often we feel guilty when we do this. But if we are honest, we must admit that we normally judge people bywhat we observe. And sometimes it is better to tell them our thoughts and to ask whether they are right (andoften it may be better not to tell them!).
This exercise however shall just help you to become aware of the difference between observation andinterpretation.
A feedback exercise:
Think of one person (student) you like (who performs well) and one you don’t like (who performs poorly) andwrite down a feedback for them. (15 minutes)
Discuss your feedbacks in groups of four and evaluate them according to our criteria. (20−30 minutes).Present two examples to the plenum.
Take the part of the person who has received your feedback and tries to answer the questions forself−reflection from his or her point of view (and write it down).
• Is the feedback congruent with my self−image?
• What can I learn from this feedback?
• How can it facilitate my personal development, how can it help me to do better? (Perhapsyou can play a dialogue with a puppet)
Rejecting feedback
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Usually it is not good to pay too much attention to an inadequate behaviour. But in this case it may be usefulto become aware of the typical patterns of rejecting feedback (and it might be fun).
We sit (or stand) in a circle, throw something soft at someone and give him a feedback (criticism orcompliment − it need not be true). The receiver rejects it. Then he throws the ball...
Plenum: Did you recognize typical phrases?
Perhaps make a second round and now the receiver tries to say something acceptant or answer one of thefollowing questions:
Is the feedback congruent with my self−image?
What can I learn from this feedback?
Self reflection
Which has been (or what would be) the nicest and the worst feedback you ever got? (You may inventsomething, if you don’t remember)
Role play:
Groups of four: You may use your cases from the written feedback exercise.
The one who gives feedback tells person B what kind of person the receiver is (will he probably reject thefeedback?), then you play the scene. Try to fulfil the criteria of good feedback (it’s much more difficult inspoken than in written language.
Observer C jots down notes concerning the person who gives feedback, observer D focuses on the personwho receives feedback.
For school:
Encourage children to give each other little cards with compliments.
Besides making compliments children should learn to criticize in a constructive manner:
describe the problematic behaviourdescribe their feelings towards that behaviourmake a proposal, say which alternative behaviour they want
Feedback should be
• specific: describe behaviours, avoid generalizations
• positive: stress the positive aspects, point out the resources.
• constructive: make suggestions for improvement instead of criticising (propose how thingscould be done better).
The person who receives feedback should
• just listen. It is important neither to reject compliments nor criticism.
• reflect what he has heard. Helpful questions are: Is the feedback congruent with myself−image? What can I learn from this feedback, how can it facilitate my personaldevelopment, how can it help me to do better?
Strategies of people who reject feedback
• they deny their responsibility:• they deny the adequacy of the feedback regarding the extent:
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• they contradict the feedback:
Feedback should be
• specific: describe behaviours, avoid generalizations (words like “always”, “never” etc.).Caution: characteristics are often overgeneralizations of behaviour: “You didn’t do yourhomework” is better than “You are lazy”.
• positive: stress the positive aspects, point out the resources. “You have done yourhomework more regularly last week, please try to do it every day.”
• constructive: make suggestions for improvement instead of criticising (propose how thingscould be done better). “I see that you have trained your handwriting. Perhaps it would evenlook nicer if you used a pen instead of a biro.”
The person who receives feedback should
• just listen. It is important neither to reject compliments nor criticism.
• reflect what he has heard. Helpful questions are: Is the feedback congruent with myself−image? What can I learn from this feedback, how can it facilitate my personaldevelopment, how can it help me to do better?
Strategies of people who reject feedback
• they deny their responsibility:
In case of criticism they might say “I couldn’t perform better, the tasks were too difficult.”
In case of compliments they might say “Oh I just look nice because you don’t wear your glasses.”
• they deny the adequacy of the feedback regarding the extent:
In case of criticism they might say “I didn’t hit him, I just pushed him a little bit, it was just fun.”
In case of compliments they might say “Oh that wasn’t much trouble to prepare this meal.”
• they contradict the feedback:
In case of criticism they might say “I haven’t been absent−minded.”
In case of compliments they might say “Oh no, my hair looks terrible.”
5. Cognition, Emotion and Behaviour
Exercise
We want to start the next unit with an exercise: Please write a letter to any close person (e.g. best friend,uncle, parents etc.)! In this letter tell precisely and detailed about a problematic event (conflict etc.), thatrecently happened to you! Later on today we will interchange and analyse these letters, so be only as intimateas you can take the responsibility for yourself.
There are three dimensions of dealing with problems. The first dimension is the cognitive level: you thinkabout the problem, you reflect about the reasons, connections, consequences etc. The second dimension isthe emotional level: being involved with the problem you feel something, you might be angry, sad, nervousetc. The third dimension is the behavioural level: you do something, you react in any way.
Now everybody has his favourite dimension and often another dimension he neglects. When a problemoccurs, some people react at once. Without having reflected on the problem they try out various ways tobehave (“First I did this, then I did that, afterwards I tried out this, but nothing helped really. I am so upset!What can I do next?”). Others first of all reflect on the problem (“The reason for it could be..., but on the other
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hand it’s probably because.... So one should perhaps..., but...”). They only think about the problem, but don’tdo anything at all or feel anything at all. Others may have strong feelings, but while they are so upset, nervousor furious they can’t think or react properly (“Everything is so awful! I’m so exited! My whole body isshivering!”).
When somebody talks about a problem, he often begins his account from a perspective in which one of thesethree dimensions is dominant. To get in contact with this person you should go along with the offereddimension first. If you ignore it and answer to a comment like “It’s so awful, I’m so frightened!” in a way like“But think about it!” or “I think you should do...” the other one probably will feel misunderstood and notaccepted in his concern.
Nevertheless in order to deal with a problem properly it is important to include all dimensions: to be aware ofone’s feelings, which developed from the problem, to be able to reflect on the problem and to reactadequately. So after having taken up contact it is sensible to get information about the under−representeddimensions. Following questions have proved to be useful:
Questions concerning reflection
• “What do you think are the reasons for it?”• “Do you see any connections?”• “What do you conclude from it?”
Questions concerning emotions
• “How did you feel in this situation?”• “You seem to be sad, angry, afraid etc.”• “Do you like the other people being concerned?”
Questions concerning behaviour
• “What did you do in this situation?”• “How did the others react?”• “What could you do now?”
If your partner does not respond to one of these dimensions, if he avoids it, then you probably found theessence, the core of the problem or the real conflict. The way to solve a problem often can be found byclearing up the under−represented dimensions.
Exercise
• Find a partner and interchange your letters!
• Try to identify the three dimensions (thinking, feeling, acting)!
• Find out, which dimensions are under−represented or missing!
• One after the other talk about the problems mentioned in the letters and try to getinformation about the under−represented dimension by putting adequate questions!
Exercise
Discuss in groups of four of five persons:
• Which aspects you heard of today are worth to be passed on to teachers and studentteachers?
• How could you train teachers in these competencies?
• How can teachers help their students to include all dimensions?
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6. Counselling as a Problem Solving Process
Problem solving (according to Meichenbaum)
A problem is defined as a kind of a task: there is an actual − negative − state of affairs and a required − better− state of affairs and in between there is a barrier. This barrier can consist of not knowing what to do toconvert state A into state B (not to know the adequate means) or as not knowing exactly what state B must belike (not to have a well−defined goal) or as a mixture of both. For example: When there is vandalism at aschool, the goal is to stop vandalism, and the barrier may be that we don’t know how to stop it. Such problemscan be solved by finding out adequate means of intervention.
Another case might be: We want to improve teachers’ education, we know the means: we must give themcourses, training, practice. But the goal is not well−defined: do better trained teachers know more theories ordo they have more methodical skills or can they just cope better with frustration or stress or whatever else?
It is an old truism, that a well−defined problem is a problem half−solved. Thus the problem solving process isdivided into smaller steps.
The Problem Solving Process
Step 1: Analysing the problem
Step 2: Generation of alternative
Step 3: Listing advantages and disadvantages of all alternative
Step 4: Decision making: Choosing the best alternative
Step 5: Putting the decision into action
Step 6: Evaluation
We have already looked at the principles of problem solving, and I mentioned earlier, that counselling islooked at as a problem solving process, too. Thus the steps of problem solving can be helpful to ask the rightquestions.
1. Analysing the problem: What is wrong with the present state? What do I want −how should it be? What isthe barrier − what do I have to think about − the means, the goals or both?
2. Generation of alternatives: What can I do or/and how can I describe my goal more precisely? It is helpfulto use (apply?) the brainstorming technique. If necessary further information can be looked for (how haveothers solved this problem, are there theories about this problem...)
3. Listing pros and cons of all alternatives: For each single alternative the possible costs andconsequences (short−term and long−term) are listed.
4. Decision making: Choosing the best alternative (with the best cost−benefit ratio)
5. Putting the decision into action
6. Evaluation: Have I reached my goal? If yes: be happy and keep this strategy in mind for similar cases. Ifnot: go back to step 1.
If a person asks you to help him to solve a problem, following strategy has been proved to be useful:
1. Ask the client to describe the problem very shortly seen from these perspectives:
• What exactly is the problem?• Under which circumstances/with which persons does it occur?• When did the problem occur the first time?• What is your part in the problem?
2. Come to a contract with the client!
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Clear up the client’s expectations and create a solid foundation, on which you can work!
• Why do you contact me?• What do you expect me to do?• Is it ok for you, if I offered you... (time and extent of counselling)
3. Clear up, what the client has done to solve his problem in the past!
Get information, whether the client has attempted to solve his problem himself or whether he has beenpassive and expects others to solve it. Make clear, whether the attempts were made in a way, that a failurewas probable or for safe!
• What have you done to solve your problem? With which results?• What do you conclude from it?• What did prevent you to solve the problem?• What do you need to solve the problem?
4. Develop solutions!
The client himself has to find (various) solution(s), regardless whether they seem to be realistic or not at themoment. If he wants to change his behaviour, it is important, that he defines intentions that are specific,positive, legal and within reach. They must be accessible by small steps!
• What do you want in future?
• How could you reach your intentions? Which ways to reach them do you see? Which wayseems to you to be the best one?
• What will you have to do to reach your intentions?
5. Plan strategies to reach the intentions!
The client should describe the behaviour, he aims at. It should be as specific and verifiable as possible!
• Tell me one or two situations, in which you can show the alternative behaviour?• What will you do first?• How will you/the others notice the results?• Do you need help? Where could you get help from?• How long will you try out the new behaviour?
6. Feedback
Find out, if the client is content with the results and if he wants to meet you again!
• Are you content with the course of our conversation and with the results?• Did you expect more or anything else?• Is it ok to end the conversation now?• Do you want to talk to me again about this problem later?
Demonstration: Counselling of a teacher
CLient: Hello Ron! I need your help. I have big trouble with Mr. Snyder’s class, and I don’t know, what to do?
Counsellor: Tell me, what exactly is the problem?
CL: Nobody in this class does what he should do. Some of the girls always giggle, some throw paper cuttings.The boys often quarrel, sometimes there is even a free−for−all. They don’t care at all, what I say. Nobodylistens to me. Teaching has become impossible. When I give them a wigging, they even mock at me.
CO: I see. There’s a real uproar in the class, and you have no control over the children. That makes youangry, I guess.
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CL: No, it’s even worse. I’m not angry but totally frightened. I’m scared already, when I enter the classroom.Even in the afternoon or at night I don’t get a moment’s peace. Often I have difficulty to fall asleep. I alwaysthink of that horrible class and then I get the wind up.
CO: I see. When did the problems start?
CL: I don’t know. I’ve never liked that class, but it hasn’t been as bad as it is now.
CO: So it got worse step by step.
CL: Right.
CO: What do you expect me to do?
CL: Perhaps you could talk to the class and tell them, how to behave at school.
CO: I don’t think that’s a good idea. It would be no use if/told them what/expect of them, although I’m not theirteacher. But I could help you find out, what you could do. Is that alright for you?
CL: Yes, I think it’s alright.
CO: So have you tried out anything to solve the problem yet?
CL: Yes, several times I’ve tried to discuss the situation with the class. I’ve told them that their behaviour isunbearable. But they don’t see any harm in it. They claim their behaviour to be quite natural.
CO: So discussions have been of no use. Have you tried anything else?
CL: Not really. Sometimes I shout at them, but, as I told you, then they even begin to laugh and to mock.
CO: If I were you, what kind of advice would you give me?
CL: I’d tell you to find out the reasons for their behaviour.
CO: Have you found out the reasons or will you be able to find them out?
CL: I think I know why they react this way. The other teachers are more severe and rigid than I am and I’mafraid the students notice my uncertainty and make use of it.
CO: Hmm, Are there any more reasons?
CL: Perhaps my lectures are boring.
CO: Do you find your lectures boring?
CL: Sometimes they might be a bit monotonous, I’m afraid. I think I’ll try to make them more varied andeventful.
CO: Now you begin to find solutions. To make the lessons more varied and eventful seems to be a good idea.Do you see any other ways to gain control over the children?
CL: I mustn’t be so nervous. I have to hide my anxieties from the students, so they won’t notice it.
CO: That’s easily said, isn’t it?
CL: Yes, you’re right. I can hardly put it into action. But I could try to react more firmly and rigidly.
CO: How would it look like?
CL: As soon as the first one begins to giggle or chat or quarrel I’ll tell him firmly and harshly to stop it,otherwise he will be punished.
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CO: Do you think you can manage it, or do you need any help?
CL: I could ask a colleague to accompany me to the lesson. He could observe my reaction and give mefeedback afterwards.
CO: Do you think you’ll find one?
CL: I’m sure that Mr. Snyder or Mrs. Miller will do that for me.
CO: So let’s summarize: What will you do?
CL: First I will try to prepare my lessons in a way that they will be more varied and eventful. Then I’ll ask acolleague to accompany me to the class and give me feedback about the severity I showed in the lesson. AndI’ll try to react to the students’ inadequate behaviour in a more rigid and severe manner.
CO: Sounds good. Are you content with the results of our talk or did you expect anything else?
CL: I’m very content and I feel much safer now. Thank you very much.
CO: Do you want to talk to me again about this concern?
CL: Yes, I would like to tell you, how it worked. Can I meet you next week again?
CO: OK, see you next week and good luck!
7. Dealing with Conflicts
If you want to talk to somebody about a conflict, it is sensible to have a certain strategy, which helps to solvethe problem in a constructive manner and to prevent an escalation. The following steps have been proved tobe useful:
1. Come to a contract with your counterpart!
Ask him (or her), if he is ready to listen to you! If necessary, fix a date! Give only short information about thesubject, don’t enter into it!
“Have you got time to talk to me? It is because...”
“I would like to talk to you about.... What time does suit you?”
2. Describe the problem
• Express your personal and functional interests!
• After having underlined the positive experiences from the past concerning the personaland/or factual dimension mention what bothers you! Describe the obstructive behaviour asspecific as possible!
• Explain the personal and/or functional problems, which result from this behaviour!
• Describe your own reactions and feelings!
Confine yourself to few aspects, don’t lash out on all sides!
3. Ask for a comment
If you are lucky, your counterpart at once will admit to have made a mistake and promise, that it won’t happenagain. But it is more probable that he at first will deny the problem. There are four possibilities to do that:
1. Your counterpart devalues his personal ability to solve the problem.(“I’m sorry, but/cannot do that./can’t help...”)
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2. Your counterpart denies the solubility of the problem at all.(“You can’t do anything against it! There is no way to solve the problem!”)
3. Your counterpart plays down the problem.(“That doesn’t matter, you shouldn’t overrate the problem!”)
4. Your counterpart does not see the problem at all,(“What’s the matter? I can’t see your point! Everything is ok!”)
If your counterpart is aware of the problem (1 and 2), you can come to an agreement how to solve it. If there isno awareness (3 and 4), you first of all have to create it.
4. Raise your counterpart’s awareness of the problem
There are various possibilities to make your counterpart realize the problem:
1. Describe the problem again: “Let me explain once more, what I mean...”
2. Offer an identification: “If I were you; I’d probably feel...” or “I can imagine, that you feel...”
3. Ask for identification: “If you were me, how would you feel/what would you do?”
4. Offer an interpretation of his behaviour: “I guess, the reason for your behaviour is..” or “Perhaps you want toreach...”
5. Express what you conclude from his behaviour during the talk: “Do you want to tell me, that the problemhas nothing to do with you/that my perception (what I observed) is totally wrong?”
6. Express specific wishes: “I expect that you.../It would be nice, if you.../I ask you to...”
7. Show possible consequences: “If you don’t change your behaviour, I’ll have to.../the consequences willbe...”
8. Finish the talk, if you got stuck: “I realize, that we won’t come to an agreement today. I suggest we’llcontinue our conversation another time.”
5. Fix the results
At the end of the talk you should put down the results together (if necessary in writing). Put the focus on theagreements you have come to, on the differences and on any further appointments you have made. Givepositive feedback for any positive reaction!
Demonstration: Dealing with Conflicts (teacher and student)
Teacher: Hi Achmed. I’d like to talk to you. It’s because of your behaviour the last days. Can you see metoday after school?
Achmed: What’s wrong with my behaviour?
T: I don’t want to discuss it now. Can we meet after school?
A: I’m sorry, it doesn’t suit me today.
T: What about tomorrow after school?
A: Sorry, I have football training tomorrow.
T: Then make another suggestion.
A: Can’t we talk now?
T: I don’t want to discuss it in a hurry.
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A: Okay, then today after school.
A: Here I am, sir. You wanted to talk to me?
T: Yes, Achmed, sit down please. Well, you’ve been in my class for two years now, haven’t you? You know Ilike you. Your an intelligent and charming boy and we’ve always got on together very well. But lately I’ve beenworried. I’ve noticed that your behaviour in my lessons has changed. You often don’t seem to be attentive,you natter with your neighbours and yesterday you even beat up Hamed. I feel responsible for you as well asfor Hamed and the others. So I don’t want you to beat up anybody again. And as I have a sense ofresponsibility for your progress in learning I want you to pay attention in my lessons.
A: But you’re wrong. I do pay attention all the time!
T: And what about today? I addressed you four times and you didn’t know what was going on, because youhad spoken to your neighbour.
A: Right, but it wasn’t my fault. He had asked me something and I answered him.
T: If you were in my place, what would you say now?
A: I’d say: Don’t answer him, but pay attention.
T: Okay: don’t answer him but pay attention!
A: Yes, sir.
T: And what about the fight with Named?
A: It wasn’t a fight but a little quarrel.
T: Hamed has got a black eye, several bruises and a twisted arm and you call it a ‘little quarrel’???
A: Perhaps it was a bit more than a little quarrel.
T: Is that all you want to say about it?
A: But again it was not my fault. He has teased me all the time and so I lost my temper.
T: Do you want to tell me, that it’s not your fault that Hamed is injured very severely?
A: Well, no, not really. It wasn’t right to beat him so hard.
T: I’ll tell you what: I don’t want you to beat Hamed or anybody else at all. If you do it again, I’ll have to punishyou very severely.
A: Yes, sir, you’re right. I made a mistake and I will apologize to Hamed. And I promise you it will neverhappen again.
T: Okay, you’ll apologize to Hamed, promise that you’ll never beat anybody again and you will be attentive inmy lessons.
A: Yes, sir. You can rely on me.
T: Okay. I’m glad you are understanding. And I hope we’ll get on together as fine as before.
A: I hope so, too, sir. Sorry for having bothered you.
Exercise
1. Think of 3 conflicts of different severity and write them down!
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2. Form groups of 4 persons and practice dealing with conflicts in a role play! A and B play the counterparts,C and D observe the conversation and give feedback at the end of it. Then change your parts!
8. Personal Prerequisites of Education and Counselling: Self Awareness, SelfEsteem, Self Efficacy (Identity)
Up to now we have discussed and trained several personal competencies and skills. Our last topic is the basicpersonal prerequisite of education and counselling, our identity. By the way: It is not only the basicprerequisite of education and counselling, it is also the main objective of these processes to strengthen anddevelop the identity of the students.
Identity can be defined as the knowledge we have about ourselves. And is has an important impact on oursocial relationships and educational processes, because we use this knowledge we have about ourselves asa matrix (blue print) for collecting information about others. This facilitates the perception of characteristics ofother persons that are similar to our own. We judge other persons using our self−image as a frame ofreference: who is taller than I am, is a tall person, who is smaller than I am, is a small person.
Our identity has also an impact on our behaviour. We make plans and take actions that fit with our mentalrepresentations of our characteristics and competencies. If I think that I like children and have goodcommunicative competencies, it may be a good idea to become a teacher. But if my self−image proves to bewrong, children get on my nerves and don’t understand my explanations, I won’t enjoy my job. Thus it isevident that an inadequate self−image leads to problems in interpersonal (and educational) behaviour.
Identity can be described as a cognitive structure, which is acquired and changed in the same way as otherknowledge structures: Information and experiences concerning ourselves are saved, generalised andintegrated into existing structures of knowledge about ourselves.
We attain knowledge about ourselves from two sources: self observation including procedures of comparisonand feedback from others. On the other hand our present identity influences our perception of ourselves andothers as well as our behaviour in social interactions.
To describe identity in detail, we can say that it has a cognitive, an affective and an action−relatedcomponent: self−concept, self−esteem and control belief.
They are closely related and influence each other (reciprocal determinism)
Self−concept − is the cognitive aspect of identity, the knowledge of a person concerning characteristics ofhimself and self−related events. It develops through self−observation, social comparison, feedback fromothers or comparison to symbolic models in films or texts.
Self−esteem − is the affective aspect of identity. It results from the self−evaluation of the person (of theperson’s self−concept) and is mainly based on comparisons of the present real self to self−images from thepast or to ideal selves and on social comparisons (to others or to symbolic models).
Control belief − is the action−related aspect of identity. It represents the subjective evaluation of havingcontrol over one’s actions, feelings and personal development. It can be internal or external (or something inbetween). Control belief contains the beliefs to be able to explain, to predict and to influence self−relatedevents. It results from a generalization of single experiences concerning the achievement of personal goalsand the related feeling of self−efficacy (the beliefs in one’s capabilities to organize and execute the course ofaction required to manage prospective situations).
On the basis of this theory the following objectives of education and counselling can be derived:
• a well−integrated self−concept with detailed, well−organised information about one’scharacteristics and attitudes, one’s strengths and weaknesses
• a self−esteem as positive as possible in congruence with reality, a feeling of “I am okay”
• preferably internal control belief, confidence in one’s own competencies
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• correspondence of the three components of identity to reality in terms of content and quality
Some methodical−didactic recommendations can also be deduced from identity theory:
• to give and encourage regular feedback that contributes to the development of the students’self−concept and fosters correspondence between the self−concept and reality it draws theattention to adequate behaviour (if it is given according to the state of the art!), thus it helps tokeep it in mind and strengthens the feeling of self−efficacy
• to stimulate exchange with others that helps to validate subjective constructs about oneself,and opens up new perspectives on the self
• to stimulate reflection on the self in order to promote a detailed and elaborated self−image
• to be empathic and accepting in order to increase (at least not to decrease) the students’self−esteem
• to provide tasks, which are appropriate to each student’s abilities and difficult enough toprovide the experience of overcoming obstacles through perseverate effort in order toincrease the students’ self−efficacy (control belief)
• to avoid stressing and frightening the students, because that reduces their felt self−efficacyand hinders them from personal development
In this context it is important to know that people partly use their physiological and emotional states in judgingtheir capabilities. That means from being nervous or frightened they conclude that they are not capableenough. Therefore it is desirable to avoid stress and anxiety in order to help students build up a positiveself−concept of their capability, their personal efficacy and a high self−esteem.
Furthermore anxiety makes personal learning impossible. As we know from humanistic psychology we mustfeel safe before we are open to new experiences. And as long as our self (or our self−esteem) is threatenedwe will at best learn how to avoid this threat but we will not learn anything essential.
In order to be able to translate these recommendations into action, teachers and counsellors shouldthemselves have reached the objectives of personal development to a certain extent.
• They need an elaborated self−concept, good knowledge about their strengths anweaknesses that helps to perceive others as detailed as possible and to be empathic (to taketheir point of view without loosing the own one).
• Their self−esteem should be as positive as possible that helps to be acceptant. Someonewho must defend his low self−esteem cannot deal with the faults and weaknesses of others ina relaxed and generous manner.
• They should have an internal control belief that helps to be confident not to loose control,even if lessons are less teacher−centred and the students gain more independence.
• And their identity should correspond to reality that helps to make adequate decisions andplans and to perceive others realistically.
So you can imagine how important it is for student teachers also to be supported in their personaldevelopment in order to become good and happy teachers.
It is not easy to find exercises to train such complex characteristics. It is more important to follow themethodological recommendations (concerning feedback, acceptance, empathy, self reflection, adequatetasks).
But we can at least try to gain some more awareness for the important aspects. So we are going to try outsome exercises for adults and some for young people.
Exercises:
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Write anonymously a statement of a feeling or a personal characteristic you have which you are not willing totell in the group (so we might see that each of us have something we want to keep for ourselves − that it isimportant to accept and shelter intimacy)
Square of values
The principle of the square:
on the right side you write the opposite of the left,on the upper side you write the positive version (aspect) of the lower side
Think of a personal characteristic (of yourself) you don’t like. Write it on the lower left corner of the square(e.g. to be pedantic).
On the upper left corner of the square you write a positive word for the same characteristic (e.g. to be exact).
On the lower right corner you write the opposite of the characteristic of the lower left corner (e.g. to bechaotic).
On the upper right corner you write a positive word for the opposite of your original characteristic (e.g. to becasual)
How to use the square:
The square can help you to raise your self esteem or to develop in a positive way. When we do not like certaincharacteristics of ourselves that is not good for our self esteem. There are two ways of enhancing our selfesteem: we can evaluate our characteristic more positively or we can change.
If a characteristic is concerned that cannot be changed, it is helpful to become aware of its positive aspects(change the perspective from the lower to the upper right corner of the square).
If we think the characteristic can be changed, the diagonal from the lower left to the upper right corner showsus the direction of desirable development.
How to initiate change
For a project of self development you can start by answering the following questions:
• What do I want to change? Describe the status quo, give examples.• How has this characteristic/problematic behaviour developed. How did I learn to be like this?• What is my goal. What is my ideal self in this domain?• Which resources do I have to reach my goal?• What else do I need to reach my goal?• How can I get what I need? Who can help me?• How can I put my plan into practice?• When will I start?
An imagination to enhance the awareness of individual resources
Try to remember three situations when you were successful. Write down for each of these situations which ofyour personal resources, characteristics, behaviour patterns have contributed to this success. Then try to findout how you could use these resources to reach an important personal goal now or in future.
The three components of identity
Self−concept − is the cognitive aspect of identity, the knowledge of a person concerning characteristics ofhimself and self−related events. It develops through self−observation, social comparison, feedback fromothers or comparison to symbolic models in films or texts.
Self−esteem − is the affective aspect of identity. It results from the self−evaluation of the person (of theperson’s self−concept) and is mainly based on comparisons of the present real self to self−images from thepast or to ideal selves and on social comparisons (to others or to symbolic models).
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Control belief − is the action−related aspect of identity. It represents the subjective impression of havingcontrol over one’s actions, feelings and personal development. It can be internal or external (or something inbetween). Control belief contains the beliefs to be able to explain, to predict and to influence self−relatedevents. It results from a generalization of single experiences concerning the achievement of personal goalsand the related feeling of self−efficacy.
Methodical−didactic recommendations deduced from identity theory:
• to give and encourage regular feedback
that contributes to the development of the students’ self−concept and fosters correspondencebetween the self−concept and reality
it draws the attention to adequate behaviour, thus helps to keep it in mind and strengthensthe feeling of self−efficacy
• to stimulate exchange with others
that helps to validate subjective constructs about oneself
• to stimulate reflection on the self
in order to promote a detailed and elaborated self−image
• to be empathic and accepting
in order to increase (at least not to decrease) the students’ self−esteem to provide tasks,which are appropriate to each student’s abilities and difficult enough to provide theexperience of overcoming obstacles through perseverate effort in order to increase thestudents’ self−efficacy (control belief)
• to avoid stressing and frightening the students, because that reduces their feeling ofself−efficacy and hinders them from personal development
The three components of identity
Self−concept
• the cognitive aspect of identity
• the knowledge of a person concerning characteristics of himself and self−related events
• develops through self−observation, social comparison, feedback from others or comparisonto symbolic models in films or texts
Self−esteem
• the affective aspect of identity
• results from the self−evaluation of the person
• is mainly based on comparisons of the present real self to self−images fromthe past or to ideal selves, and on social comparisons (to others or tosymbolic models)
Control belief
• the action−related aspect of identity
• represents the subjective impression of having control over one’s actions,feelings and personal development
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• can be internal or external (or something in between)
• contains the beliefs to be able to explain, to predict and to influenceself−related events
results from a generalization of single experiences concerning the achievement of personal goals and therelated feeling of self−efficacy
Objectives of education concerning identity
• a well−integrated self−concept with detailed, well−organised information about one’scharacteristics and attitudes, one’s strengths and weaknesses
• a self−esteem as positive as possible in congruence with reality, a feeling of “I am okay”
• preferably internal control belief, confidence in one’s own competencies
• correspondence of the three components of identity to reality in terms of content and quality
Methodical−didactic recommendations deduced from identity theory:
• to give and encourage regular feedback that contributes to the development of the students’self−concept and fosters correspondence between the self−concept and reality it draws theattention to adequate behaviour, thus helps to keep it in mind and strengthens the feeling ofself−efficacy
• to stimulate exchange with others that helps to validate subjective constructs about oneself,and opens up new perspectives
• to stimulate reflection on the self in order to promote a detailed and elaborated self−image
• to be empathic and accepting in order to increase (at least not to decrease) the students’self−esteem
• to provide tasks, which are appropriate to each student’s abilities and difficult enough toprovide the experience of overcoming obstacles through perseverate effort in order toincrease the students’ self−efficacy (control belief)
• to avoid stressing and frightening the students because that reduces their feeling ofself−efficacy and hinders them from personal development
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