Benefits Series1 Episode 1 Pilot

8/14/2019 Benefits Series1 Episode 1 Pilot

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EXT. OLD HOUSE- LATE MORNING

STACEY (20) and JERRY (16) KINGER sit in the movers van

outside their old house.

The two orphaned siblings watch through the side mirrors as

the mover men put their possessions into the back of the big

blue van.

STACEY (V.O)

Life and death. They are two serious words. Me and my brother

hate serious. But lately thats all lifes been. You see are

Mum and Dad died in a fatal boating incident and now were off

to my Mums friends house in Brighton. Fucking Brighton.

The van moves down the empty street road.

INT. NEW HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- SAME MORNING

PEPPER (18) sits on the sofa smoking a cigarette and watching

Napoleon Dynamite.

NORMA (34) walks in with the polish and throws it onto thesofa next to PEPPER.

PEPPER

(Lazily)

Whats this?

NORMA

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Polish.

PEPPER

Cant you see Im doing something?

NORMA

Watching Napoleon Dynamite a-fucking-gain?

PEPPER

Yes I like it.

NORMA

The kids will be here soon so get up and help.

PEPPER

They live 3 hours away and they only rang to say theyre on

their way 20 minutes ago. So I dunno what youre worrying

about.

NORMA

At least go wake youre drugged up fuck-head of a boyfriend

will you?

PEPPER

Let me just watch this last bit.

NORMA

Pepper theres an hour and 10 minutes left of it.

PEPPER

Just this last bit.

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NORMA squirts PEPPER with the polish and PEPPER shoots up.

PEPPER

Lovely that.

PEPPER walks out of the living room leaving the DVD playing.

NORMA takes the DVD out of the player and throws it out of the

open window, then begins to polish the TV screen.

INT. HOUSE, KITCHEN- SAME MORNING

JOSHUA (22) lies on the kitchen floor asleep whilst twins KYLE

and SADIE (16) sit at the table.

KYLE eats Coco pops.

And SADIE reads Maximum Ride.

PEPPER comes in.

PEPPER

Normas going absolutely nuts.

SADIE

(Looking up from her book)

Pepper? Do you ever wish you could sprout wings and fly? Just

whoosh. Fly away?

PEPPER

Kyle go pour a bucket of water over your Sisters head will

you?

KYLE

That never helps.

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KYLE tips his Coco pops onto JOSHUAS face.

KYLE

Hes out for the count Pep.

PEPPER

Jesus.

PEPPER kicks JOSHUAS unconscious body.

PEPPER

Wake up or Norma will castrate you!

SADIE

What are we gonna do with his ashes?

KYLE

Snort them.

They both giggle.

PEPPER

Youre on about something completely different. Wheres David?

KYLE

Garden with Eskimo.

PEPPER

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Is he romantically involved with that Dog or something?

SADIE

Wouldnt be the weirdest thing hes ever been romanticallyinvolved with.

PEPPER

Wake Josh up will you?

BOTH SADIE & KYLE

Yes.

EXT. GARDEN- SAME MORNING

DAVID (26) is kneeling in front of ESKIMO the Dog which is sat

on a tree stump.

PEPPER walks out to him.

PEPPER

What the fuck are you doing?

DAVID

Worshipping my lord. What does it look like?

PEPPER

Why?

DAVID

Well I got to thinking. If God really is real then its

unlikely hed be watching us from a cloud right? But then Irealised that God backwards is Dog.

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PEPPER

And you think what exactly?

DAVID

I think. Well I realise. Eskimo is one of Gods many watchers.

PEPPER

So all Dogs are here to make sure were. . . good?

DAVID

Exactly.

PEPPER

Makes sense.

PEPPER kneels down next to DAVID and they both begin to pray.

NORMA runs out into the conservatory and looks at them.

NORMA

(To herself)

Fuck. Its too late to cancel.

INT. MOVERS VAN- SAME MORNING

STACEY and JERRY sit looking uncomfortably out of the window.

The DRIVER puts his hand on STACEYS leg.

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JERRY

(Still looking out the window)

My Sisters a Lesbian.

The DRIVER licks his lips.

DRIVER

(Welch accent)

Thats alright with me.

STACEY

Christ.

They come up near a cafe.

STACEY

Can we stop? Im fucking starved.

DRIVER

Well if you want some sausage shouldnt we stop somewhere. . .

a little less public?

JERRY

Stop the van please.

The van stops outside the cafe.

STACEY and JERRY get out.

EXT. CAFE- EARLY AFTERNOON

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The DRIVER gets out.

DRIVER

(To STACEY)

Im in the toilet if you need anything baby.

STACEY half grins and follows her Brother to the cafe.

INT. CAFE- SAME AFTERNOON

STACEY and JERRY sit down looking at menus.

JERRY

It stinks in here.

STACEY

Not as bad as in that shitting van.

JERRY

I know I nearly had a panic attack.

STACEY

I saw thats why we came in here.

JERRY

Plus he was harassing you.

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STACEY

Do you want some air?

JERRY

Yeah. Order for me yeah?

STACEY

Okie doke.

JERRY walks out.

EXT. CAFE- SAME AFTERNOON

JERRY stands against the wall.

He tilts his head back and sighs.

JERRY

(To himself)

Bollocking hell.

JERRY begins to pant loudly.

He runs to the van.

Sticks his hand into the open window.

Pulls up the lock and grabs his shoulder bag.

Inside the shoulder bag are tablets brown bags and an inhaler.

JERRY takes the inhaler and puffs it 3 times.

He throws up onto the floor.

JERRY spits and walks back to the cafe with his shoulder bagonto his shoulder.

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JERRY takes out an air freshener can and sprays to around thecafe.

He sits back down opposite STACEY.

STACEY

I ordered us both 2 ham, eggs and chips.

JERRY

Drink?

STACEY

Fanta.

JERRY

Cheers.

INT. HOUSE, KITCHEN- SAME AFTERNOON

SADIE sits at the table still reading.

KYLE washes the pots.

And JOSHUA is still sleeping.

SADIE closes the book and places it onto the table.

SADIE

Done. That was a bit of alright actually.

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KYLE

Is there a sequel?

SADIE

Yeah. Ill get it from the library later.

KYLE

Cool. Ill read it after you.

SADIE

You aint read the first one.

KYLE

You can tell me what happens.

SADIE

Like shit. Can I ask you a question though?

KYLE

Yep.

SADIE

Why do you always wash the pots?

KYLE

You know when you come out of the shower and your body feels

fresh and new?

SADIE

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Yeah.

KYLE

Thats how my hands feel after Ive washed up.

SADIE

Oh wow. Can I finish them?

KYLE

Sure.

KYLE whips his hands on a tea towel.

JOSHUA pops up with his arms stretched in front of him like a

zombie.

SADIE screams and KYLE jumps up.

In the back garden the song Ballroom blitz by The Misfits

blares from DAVIDS stereo.

SADIE, KYLE AND JOSHUA look out of the window to see PEPPER

and DAVID dancing around the tree stump and ESKIMO sits on it

watching them.

JOSHUA

What the fuck!

PEPPER waves whilst dancing.

PEPPER

Its only a song pudding.

SADIE and KYLE begin to sing along whilst JOSHUA stands with

his hands covering his ears.

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SADIE & KYLE

Oh yeah, it was electric, so franticly hectic

And the band started leaving, 'cause they all stopped

breathing.

NORMA walks outside and turns off the music.

She picks up ESKIMO and walks away.

DAVID

Youre going to Hell for that.


STACEY and JERRY sit still eating their food.

JERRY

Have you ever met her? Norma I mean.

STACEY

Erm, one time. But you know weve been talking on the phone

recently.

JERRY

She nice?

STACEY

She lives with 5 other people you know.

JERRY

Yeah you said. So is she nice? Are they nice?

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STACEY

She seems it. The rest are a mystery.

JERRY

Christ. I hope they dont smell.

The DRIVER comes into the cafe and stands at the table.

DRIVER

Are you about ready?

JERRY

(Clears his throat)

I am.

JERRY stands up and walks out.

STACEY walks and the DRIVER slaps her arse.

STACEY

One more fucking time.

INT. VAN- SAME AFTERNOON

JERRY opens the glove compartment and finds a bag of weed and

a toblarone.

DRIVER

Do any of you smoke weed?

STACEY

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Bad experience.

DRIVER

Ive had plenty of them. What about you?

JERRY

Weed smells.

DRIVER

True. But you get used to it.

JERRY

Any kind of new smell. . . makes me wanna die.

DRIVER

Isnt every smell new at some point?

JERRY

I dont know how it works just some smells.

STACEY

Hes got OCD.

DRIVER

So you want to clean all the time?

JERRY

Its different for every OCD sufferer.

DRIVER

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Right. I dont think youre a freak or nothing.

JERRY

I couldnt give a flying fuck if you did.

INT. HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- LATE AFTERNOON

Everyone is sitting in the freshly clean living room watching

The Catherine Tate Show.

DAVID

For a ginger shes pretty. Ent she.

NORMA

What does it matter what colour her hair is?

PEPPER

Its not the hair that makes ginger people weird looking.

Its the pale skin and all them freckles.

JOSHUA

Its the same with brunettes and moles.

SADIE

Or blondes and big boobs.

KYLE

Youre boobs aint that big, so leave my tape measure alone.

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NORMA

Did you finish that book Sadie?

SADIE

Yeah. It was good.

NORMA

I have a few youd like.

SADIE

Yeah?

NORMA

Yeah. Youve seen interview with a vampire havent you?

SADIE

Yeah.

NORMA

Well the films based on a book by Ann Rice.

JOSHUA

Didnt I read a few of them?

NORMA

Yeah but you gave up on them remember?

JOSHUA

Oh yeah. Vampires. Witches and incest.

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SADIE

Um I might give them a look.

PEPPER

Im hungry.

KYLE

Me too.

DAVID

Chippy?

SADIE

Ill go with you.

EXT. SHOPS- SAME AFTERNOON

SADIE and DAVID walk down along the strip of shops which

include the paper shop. The post office. The chippy. The

Chinese and the ATM machines.

DAVID goes into the chippy

SADIE goes into the paper shop.

The Indian shop owner RADNASH eyes her up.

SADIE

Im not in here for long Radnash so get a good look.

RADNASH

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(Strong Indian accent)

I have a wife and children.

SADIE

Do they know you like mentally shagging young girls?

RADNASH

I wasnt. I was making sure you dont steal anything. Do your

Parents know that youre a thief or that youre always doped

up?

SADIE

My Parents dont know me.

RADNASH

Fuck off out of my shop.

SADIE

You aint the best of businessmen are you.

RADNASH

Go.

SADIE

Youre a racist.

RADNASH

Whatever you say.

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SADIE

That aint a good thing to admit.

RADNASH

If I was a racist I wouldnt be in this country.

SADIE

In that case I wish you was.

DAVID bursts through the door.

DAVID

Battered sausage.

RADNASH

I beg your pardons?

SADIE

Chill your beans Raddy.

SADIE takes a tin of peach slices and walks out of the shop

with DAVID.

EXT. STREET- SAME AFTERNOON

SADIE and DAVID walk down the street.

SADIE

Im worried Dave.

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DAVID

About what?

SADIE

Them two kids they dont know what kind of dysfunctional

family we are.

DAVID

Maybe they do. Maybe they just want to be part of a family.

SADIE

Who would willingly walk into our lives?

DAVID

Tell me whats wrong with our lives.

SADIE

Nothing. Our life rocks. But some people dont see it that

way. Do they?

DAVID

Our living condition is strange but we like it. So if they

dont. I guess theyll have to leave. Eskimo will make sure

everything stays cool.

SADIE laughs.

SADIE

Eskimo the God Dog.

DAVID

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We could make a TV series out of that.

SADIE

Id watch it.

Tyre tracks squeak down the road and a blue movers van hits

the curb.

SADIE and DAVID run up to it.

STACEY and JERRY jump out of it.

DRIVER

I just wanted to touch them.

JERRY

Fuck off you cheese end. My Sister dont want you going

anywhere near her goodies.

DRIVER

She does.

STACEY grabs the DRIVER.

STACEY

Oh yes.

STACEY throws him to the floor.

STACEY

Walk home twat face.

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DAVID kicks the DRIVER.

DAVID

Who are you two.

STACEY

Im Stacey and this is Jerry.

SADIE

Oh wow. Your coming to live with us?

JERRY

You live with Norma?

SADIE

Yeah. Is that your shit in the back?

STACEY

Sure is.

SADIE stands on the DRIVERS penis and gets into the van.

STACEY, JERRY and DAVID get in with her.

The van disappears down the road.

The DRIVER screams.

INT. VAN- EARLY EVENING

SADIES driving.

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JERRY

Do have a drivers license?

SADIE

Fuck no, I aint even old enough to learn how to drive.

JERRY

Right.

DAVID

Who was that cock back there?

STACEY

The driver.

JERRY

A lonely cunt is what I call him.

STACEY

Jerry, you know what I think about that word.

SADIE laughs.

SADIE

If that word offends you then Im sorry. Because we do worse

things than say cunt in our family.

JERRY

Well we really want to be part of your family.

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DAVID

You already are.

STACEY

You knew our Mum and Dad?

DAVID

Erm no.

SADIE

Norma is like a foster-Mum. She takes care of the fucked-up.

JERRY

Im fucked-up.

DAVID

What about you Stacey? Are you fucked up?

STACEY

Been there. Done that. Got the jab. Literally.

DAVID gives nod of understanding.

JERRY

Your house doesnt smell does it?

SADIE

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Our house.

JERRY

Sorry. Our house doesnt smell does it?

INT. HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- SAME EVENING

NORMA looks out of the window whilst the rest are watching

Keeping up appearances.

PEPPER

Norma what are you waiting for?

NORMA

I want them two back before Stacey and Jerry turn up.

KYLE

Why does that matter?

NORMA

Well its less nerve wrecking for them that way.

PEPPER

How do you even know their nervous? They might be perfectly

calm.

JOSHUA laughs and points at the TV.

JOSHUA

Shes so menacing.

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NORMA

Well its intimidating coming to a new family isnt it?

KYLE

Me and Sadie didnt find it intimidating.

NORMA

Your Parents hadnt just died.

KYLE

For all we know they did.

PEPPER

Look theres nothing for them to be intimidated by anyway. But

even if they would to be a little shy were nice people.

KYLE

Just a little fucked. To the core. That can be a bit off

putting sometimes.

PEPPER

Yeah well. About 6 hours ago they were gonna be here in 3

hours so maybe they wont be here until tomorrow.

NORMA

No they text me saying they were going to be late. Something

about a Welch twat perving on them.

KYLE

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Jesus I hope they didnt get murdered like in one of them

horror films.

KYLE hears a horrifying girls shriek in his imagination.

NORMA notices a blue van pull up at the curb outside the

house.

The van has the words LODGELEY MOVERS in big white letters on

the side.

NORMA

Shitake mushrooms! Theyre here.

JOSHUA

Whoa Shitake!

PEPPER

Wait. Sadie and David are with them.

KYLE

What?

NORMA

Oh no.

EXT. HOUSE, FRONT GARDEN- EVENING

STACEY and JERRY walk up the path with SADIE and DAVID behind

them.

INT. HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- EVENING

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NORMA takes a deep breath.

NORMA

Here goes.

PEPPER

Chill out Norm everything will be copasetic.

KYLE

Why dont you just say cool?

The front door opens and JERRY and STACEY walk into the living

room.

NORMA turns off the TV.

They all stand in silence.

JOSHUA gets up and hugs them both making JERRY drop his

shoulder bag.

JOSHUA

(Pulling away)

Hiya.

JERRY

Hi.

STACEY

Hello.

NORMA nods her head and looks around the room before tracing

her eyes back to JERRY and STACEY.

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NORMA

How are you both?

JERRY

Tired.

PEPPER

Are you hungry?

KYLE

Yeah me and Sadie make the best brownies ever you wont feel

the same after eating them thats for sure.

JOSHUA

I want some of them.

NORMA

No, no one is having any special brownies. Not today.

JERRY

Your house doesnt smell.

PEPPER

Thats a good thing?

JERRY

Wonderful. It means I wont puck all over the floor.

KYLE

Well thats a good thing.

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NORMA

Right. Kyle, Sadie go show Jerry the room. Stacey follow

Pepper and Joshua.

Everyone leaves the room.

DAVID and NORMA are left on their own.

NORMA

Theyre both nice.

DAVID

Cute.

NORMA

Not Jerry.

DAVID

No hes. . . spacey.

NORMA

I wish I was fucking in space right now.

DAVID

Let me find Eskimos calming pills.

NORMA

Please do.

INT. HOUSE, PEPPER & JOSHUAS ROOM- SAME EVENING

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STACEY looks at the bed a little off put.

INT. HOUSE, KYLE & SADIES ROOM- SAME EVENING

In the room are a bunk bed and a water mattress.

KYLE

Thats your water mattress.

JERRY smells it.

KYLE

This is getting insulting.

JERRY

Sorry. I have OCD.

SADIE

Oh right.

SADIE sits on the mattress.

SADIE

So what are you studying at college?

JERRY

Art.

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KYLE

Your an artist?

JERRY

Somewhat. What about you two?

SADIE

Critical Thinking.

KYLE

Travel and Tourism.

JERRY

So a Politian and a Holiday rep?

KYLE

Yeah.

SADIE

No. I dont really want to be a Politian. I just like arguing

and opinion. And kicking shit out of judgmental people.

JERRY

When does college start?

KYLE

Tomorrow.

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SADIE

And to celebrate it were going to a party later. Wanna come?

JERRY

Sure.

KYLE laughs.

INT. HOUSE, KITCHEN- EARLY NIGHT

ESKIMO sits on the table and DAVID sits looking at him.

DAVID

What does God want me to do Eskimo?

KYLE walks into the room.

KYLE

Wheres Josh?

DAVID

Pissing in the pond.

KYLE

Cheer.

KYLE walks through the conservatory and into the garden.

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EXT. HOUSE, BACK GARDEN.

JOSHUA is peeing in the pond trying to hit the fish.

KYLE

Oi Josh.

JOSHUA

Yes friend.

KYLE

You got. . . the stuff.

JOSHUA

Ey?

KYLE

For the party.

JOSHUA

Stuff. Stuff.

KYLE

Yes the stuff. Illegal stuff.

JOSHUA

Oh stuff. You mean drugs dont you?

KYLE

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Yes.

JOSHUA

Why not just say that? Did you forget what it was called?

KYLE

Yes I forgot the word drugs existed.

JOSHUA

Dont worry mate. Happens to me all the time.

KYLE

Not surprised. Why are you pissing on the Fish?

JOSHUA

Because they just swim. I want to see them fight back.

KYLE

They wont.

JOSHUA

I need a shit. Theyll do something then.

KYLE

Sort the stuff out yeah?

JOSHUA

Stuff.

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KYLE

Yeah?

JOSHUA

Stuff.

KYLE

Okay.

INT. HOUSE, KITCHEN- SAME NIGHT

KYLE walks into the kitchen where DAVID is playing The

Prodigy, Outer Space. On his boom box.

He has it over his head swaying.

EXT. HOUSE, BACK GARDEN- SAME NIGHT

JOSHUA does his shorts up and walks into the green house.

INT. GREEN HOUSE- SAME NIGHT

JOSHUA takes a bag off drugs including, Acid, Weed, Coke and

Pills out from behind a cacti pot.

EXT. HOUSE,BACK GARDEN- SAME NIGHT

JOSHUA looks up at SADIE & KYLE and now JERRYS new room

window.

Where SADIE stands signalling him with her hand as she opens

the window with the other.

JOSHUA throws the bag at the window and SADIE catches it.

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INT. HOUSE, SADIE, KYLE & JERRYS ROOM- SAME NIGHT

SADIE looks for a place to stash the drugs. She hears JERRYcoming back from the toilet.

SADIE shoves the bag into JERRYS shoulder bag.

JERRY walks into the room and smiles at her.

SADIE smiles back.

SADIE

OCD ey?

JERRY

Yeah.

SADIE

What kinda smells dont you like?

JERRY

I dont know. Just some smells make me sick. You have a Dog?

SADIE

Who?

JERRY

We. Do we have a Dog?

SADIE

Yeah his names Eskimo.

JERRY

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Hell probably make me throw-up.

SADIE

No hes one of Gods watchers.

JERRY

What?

SADIE

Nothing.

INT. HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- SAME NIGHT

NORMA sits looking at the off TV set.

STACEY goes in and sits next to NORMA.

STACEY

Hey.

NORMA

Oh hi. How are you doing?

STACEY

Good. Listen thank you for this. You didnt have to.

NORMA

Its like my job. Looking after people.

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STACEY

Yeah well you know Im old enough to take care of Jerry.

NORMA

I didnt ask you both here just for Jerry. Besides you dont

have a house.

STACEY

I was gonna buy it from the council.

NORMA

If you find you dont like it here you can go any time you

want. But dont ever feel you cant come back.

STACEY puts her head on NORMAS shoulder.

And they both sit in silence.

INT. HOUSE, HALLWAY- SAME NIGHT

SADIE walks down the stairs wearing heels and in a short

skirt, a vest top with a small hand bag.

KYLE walks out of the kitchen.

JERRY walks down the stairs after SADIE.

SADIE

Are we ready to party?

KYLE

I think we should take the Dog with us.

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EXT. STREET- LATE NIGHT

SADIE, KYLE and JERRY walk down the street.

JERRY has his shoulder bag on but is unaware that thedrugs are in it.

JERRY

So where is this party?

KYLE

Youll see mate.

SADIE

Youll love it.

EXT. SHOPPING CENTRE- SAME NIGHT

The 3 teens walk down the car park to the shopping centre.

JERRY

Why are we here for?

KYLE

This is where the partys at kidder.

JERRY

You what?

SADIE

Yep. One of the security guards is obsessed with Pepper so she. . .

convinced him to open it for us.

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JERRY

This is illegal though?

SADIE

This would be a proper corrupt city if it wasnt.

KYLE

Plus it wouldnt be any fun.

The teens are at the doors.

A security guard NIGEL opens the giant doors and lets them.

NIGEL locks the doors.

INT. SHOPPING CENTRE- SAME NIGHT

Britney Spears, If you seek Amyis blaring from the speakers and

Teenagers are going mental around the shopping centre.

The shops are all closed but the teens have alcohol and are dancing,

laughing and kissing.

NIGEL

Oh hows Pepper doing?

SADIE

Fine Nigel.

SADIE and KYLE walk into the bedlam.

JERRY

Couldnt you get sacked for this?

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No I dont do drugs. The alcohol is about all Ill take.

SADIE

But you wont get drunk will you?

JERRY

No.

SADIE

Right.

SADIE pushes the bag into JERRYS arms.

SADIE

If you aint gonna take none sell it will you?

JERRY

Erm is it illegal?

SADIE sighs and walks away.

JERRY

Oh okay.

JERRY begins selling the drugs to surrounding people.

KYLE stands on top of the non-moving escalators kissing a strange

girl.

SADIE walks up the next-door escalators and pushes the girl away.

SADIE lights a joint.

They both watch JERRY.

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SADIE

We could make something out of him couldnt we?

KYLE

Life just got interesting Sade.

INT. HOUSE, LIVING ROOM- SAME NIGHT

PEPPER, NORMA and STACEY are sitting in the living room.

PEPPER is rubbing her Napoleon Dynamite DVD.

PEPPER

Fuck sakes Norma. Whyd you chuck it out the window for?

NORMA

Because its not a good film at all.

STACEY

Erm wheres Jerry?

NORMA

With Kyle and Sadie somewhere.

PEPPER

Erm Sadie and Kyle went to a party.

STACEY

So Jerrys with them?

PEPPER

Yes.

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NORMA

That sounds fun. Where is it?

PEPPER

The shopping centre.

NORMA

(Looks suspiciously at PEPPER)

This isnt the illegal drug filled college celebration party by any

chance? The one I said no way to?

PEPPER

Possibly.

NORMA stands up

NORMA

Pepper get down there now.

STACEY stands.

STACEY

Im coming with you.

PEPPER stands.

PEPPER

Fine. You can drive. Josh!

NORMA

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Why does he have to go?

PEPPER

(Walking out of the room)

Theyre his drugs.

STACEY follows her out.

NORMA sits back down.

She sighs and brushes her hands through her hair.

INT. NORMAS CAR- SAME NIGHT

STACEY is driving.

PEPPER is in the passengers seat.

JOSHUA is in the middle back seat.

JOSHUA moves forward.

JOSHUA

(To STACEY)

What are you gonna do to them?

STACEY

Nothing. Norma on the other hand.

JOSHUA

Theyre in the shit.

PEPPER

So are you. Useless bastard. Why would you give them drugs?

JOSHUA

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Says you who enjoys my drugs.

PEPPER

Im not six-fucking-teen.

JOSHUA

No your 18.

PEPPER

Oh piss off.

They come to the shopping centre car park.

JOSHUA jumps up.

JOSHUA

Your gonna smash into the building.

STACEY

What?

JOSHUA grabs the steering wheel.

PEPPER

Joshua you twat!

They smack into the curb with a bump.

STACEY unclips her seat belt and gets out.

She runs up to the big glass doors and looks through it with a

disgusted look on her face.

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She bangs on the glass.

STACEY

Open the fucking door.

NIGEL walks up to the door.

NIGEL

Please dont tell no one.

STACEY

Open the door now!

PEPPER runs up behind her.

PEPPER

Nigel open it!

NIGEL opens the door.

STACEY barges past him.

INT. SHOPPING CENTRE- SAME NIGHT

NIGEL locks the door and sees JOSHUA licking the car window.

NIGEL

You alright then Pepper?

PEPPER

You were premature Nigel. Im not doing it again.

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STACEY sees JERRY in the crowd and grabs his arm.

STACEY

Come on!

JERRY

Stacey? Are you mad at me!

STACEY

Where are the other two?

JERRY

Peppers got them

PEPPER grabs SADIE and KYLE by the arms.

They all run to the door and NIGEL unlocks it.

They run out.


They hear police sirens and run into the car.


Police cars begin to swarm the car park so STACEY put her foot down.


they drive out of the area

A police car follows them

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A group of officers run up to the centre.


SADIE, PEPPER and KYLE are in the back with JOSHUA.

JERRY is in the passengers seat

SADIE and KYLE laugh.

JOSHUA laughs with them just for the sake of it.

STACEY

That wasnt funny.

JERRY

It was a bit.

PEPPER

It was funny but totally irresponsible.

STACEY

I dont see the funny side myself.

JERRY

(To himself)

You never do.

STACEY hears him though.

Behind them they hear a siren.

PEPPER laughs.

PEPPER

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Of course.

STACEY unexpectedly to the others takes a turn into a field

surrounded by high bushes.

She stops the car in the middle of the field and locks the doors.

STACEY

We aint leaving.

SADIE

How much did you sell Jerry?

STACEY

How much of what?

JERRY

I got 98.

STACEY

Selling what?

KYLE

Drugs.

STACEY

What? Jerry you nob end.

JOSHUA notices a cow running towards the back of the car.

JOSHUA

Moo!

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PEPPER looks through the back window and sees the cow.

PEPPER

Drive Stacey.

SADIE

You can have 8 pounds of it hows that?

JOSHUA

Moo!

PEPPER

Stacey fucking drive!

PEPPER turns the key in the ignition and pulls the gear shift.

STACEY looks through the rear view mirror.

STACEY

Jesus fucking Christ.

STACEY drives and the car tips into a ditch.

The cow runs back.

STACEY

Bollocks.

INT. HOUSE, KITCHEN- 1 HOUR LATER, NIGHT

NORMA and DAVID sit at the table with ESKIMO on the table.

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The conservatory door opens and PEPPER, JOSHUA, SADIE, KYLE, STACEY

and JERRY walk through to the kitchen.

All covered in mud and bear foot with their shoes in their hands.

PEPPER

Ill go get your car tomorrow.

NORMA

What wheres my car?

DAVID

Dude wheres my car.

They all laugh apart from STACEY and NORMA.

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BENEFITS

EPISODE 1

THE PILOT

BY CODY MALTBY

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Documents

Benefits Series1 Episode 1 Pilot