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Chapter 13

Peer Relationships

• Peers are close in age to one another

• Peers aid in emotional, social, and cognitive

development

• Perspectives on peers: Piaget: can be more open, spontaneous, critical, ask for

clarification, elaborate ideas, and get feedback from peers

Vygotsky: can learn new skills, develop cognitive

capacities and cooperation skills through peer interactions

Others believe that one can gain companionship,

assistance, emotional support, and experience first

intimate, interpersonal relationships with peers

(“chumship”-Harry Stack Sullivan)

Peers

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What Is Special About

Peer Relationships?

Piaget, Vygotsky, and others argued that peer relationships provide a unique context for cognitive, social, and emotional development.

• The equality, reciprocity, cooperation, and intimacy that can develop in peer relationships enhance children's reasoning ability and their concern for others.

Both disagreement and cooperation

within the context of peer

relationships have been emphasized

by theorists as important contributors

to children's cognitive development.

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• Friends spend time together, feel affection for each

other, and exhibit give-and-take (reciprocities)

Friendship

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Why would friendship evolve?

How did selection shape genes for friendship?

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1. Group with altruists, busily out-

competing all the other groups.

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2. The selfish individuals in the

group are getting the benefit but

paying no cost. In the next

generation selfish have increased

within the group. 3. And now

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extinct even

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they’ve

helped the

group.

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The Evolution of Cooperation

and Altruism:

Reciprocal altruism: Benefit-delivering adaptations

can evolve when reciprocated later in time

What is a best friend?

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• The Development of Friendship

Between 12-18 months there are early signs of

interactions and responsiveness (touch, smiles)

Around 20 months, children initiate more interactions

with selected peers

Around age 2, children develop more complex social

interactions with friends than nonfriends (imitation,

cooperation, and problem solving)

Between toddlerhood and preschool, children show more

pretend play, conflict, and nonaggressive conflict

resolution with friends than nonfriends

During the school years there is more communication,

cooperation, conflict resolution, and intimacy

Early school years (ages 6-8): Friendship is defined

by actual activities (playing and sharing);

instrumental and concrete

Middle school years (ages 9-adolescence);

Friendship is defined by mutual liking, closeness,

and loyalty

In adolescence, friendship is defined by intimacy,

disclosure, and feedback

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Early Peer Interactions and

Friendships

By or before age 2

Some researchers have argued that children can have

friends

Many 12- to 18-month-olds

Children seem to select and prefer

some children over others

Starting at around 20 months of age

Children also increasingly initiate more interactions

with some children than with others

By age 2

Children begin to develop skills that

allow greater complexity in their social interactions

By age 3 or 4

Children can make and maintain

friendships with peers

By age 3 to 7

Children can have “best friends” that are stable over at

least several months' time

During the school years there is more communication,

cooperation, conflict resolution, and intimacy

Early school years (ages 6-8): Friendship is defined

by actual activities (playing and sharing);

instrumental and concrete

Middle school years (ages 9-adolescence);

Friendship is defined by mutual liking, closeness,

and loyalty

In adolescence, friendship is defined by intimacy,

disclosure, and feedback

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Dimensions on Which Elementary School

Children Often Evaluate Their Friendships

Dimension Indicators

Validation and Caring

Makes me feel good about my ideas. Tells me I am good at things.

Conflict Resolution

Make up easily when we have a fight. Talk about how to get over being mad.

Conflict and Betrayal

Argue a lot. Doesn’t listen to me.

Help and Guidance

Help each other with schoolwork a lot. Loan each other things all the time.

Companionship and Recreation

Always sit together at lunch. Do fun things together a lot.

Intimate Exchange

Always tell each other our problems. Tell each other secrets.

•Support and Validation

Loneliness, periods of transition (elementary to

junior high), buffer against unpleasant

experiences (being bullied), confidants

•Social and Cognitive Skills

Children learn complex play, peer norms, and

understanding of others’ emotional states

Functions of Friendships

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•Benefit (Note: this research is correlational)

People with a reciprocated best friend in preadolescence

also report doing better in college, family, and in their

social life;

They also had higher self-worth and less psychopathology

than those who did not have a reciprocated best friend in

preadolescence.

The Psychological Costs

and Benefits of Friendship

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•Cost

Children with antisocial and aggressive friends tend to

exhibit those behaviors, too

Adolescents who abuse alcohol and drugs have friends

who do so

The Psychological Costs

and Benefits of Friendship

Sex Differences in Functions of

Friendships

Girls’ friendships are more intimate than boys’ and provide more

validation, caring, and help.

Boys and girls report similar amounts of fighting and meanness to

their friends, but girls resolve their conflicts more easily.

Boys’ and girls’ friendships are similar in that the friendships

involve spending time together, but boys and girls spend time in

different activities.

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• Proximity (important in the early years)

• Age-mates (in industrialized countries)

• Sex (same-sex friendships appear early)

• Race (seems to be the least important)

• Similarity and interest (becomes important around age 7)

Choosing Friends

• Groups begin to emerge early in toddlerhood with

some members showing more dominance than others

in the group

• In middle childhood, cliques form (friendship

groups of 3-9 children) Voluntary forming and joining

Not everyone is a close friend

Members are bonded by similarities (academics,

aggression, shyness, attractiveness, popularity, values)

Groups are not stable and turnover is high

The central figures tend to be popular, cooperative,

studious and some are “cool” or “tough”

Children join for a sense of belonging

Groups

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•Between ages 11–18: A person may be a member of many cliques

The cliques become more stable

During early-mid adolescence focus on dress &

behavior

During late adolescence the focus is more on

individual relations and becoming autonomous

•Between ages 11–18: A person may be a member of many cliques

The cliques become more stable

During early-mid adolescence focus on dress &

behavior

During late adolescence the focus is more on

individual relations and becoming autonomous

During late adolescence crowds form:

Groups with a similar stereotyped

reputation, such as the “jocks” and the

“nerds”

Adolescents do not necessarily choose what

crowd they are in; peer assigned

Negative peer group influences (gangs)

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Boys and Girls in Cliques and

Crowds Gender differences

• Adolescent girls tend to be more integrated into cliques.

• Adolescent boys have a greater diversity of friends.

Dyadic dating

• Starting in seventh grade, girls and boys tend to associate with

one another more and dyadic dating relationships become

increasingly common.

• By high school, cliques of friends often include adolescents of

both sexes.

Cyberspace and

Child's Peer

Experience Risks

• Cyberbulling

Benefits

• Cyber support

The most common ways U.S. adolescents

contact their friends. (Lenhart et al., 2010)

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Romantic Relationships

Romantic relationships

• In the U.S., 25% of 12-year-olds and 70% of 18-year-olds

report having had a romantic relationship in the past 18

months.

• Between 14 to 18 years, adolescents tend to balance time

they spend with romantic partners and friends.

• By young adulthood, time with romantic partners increases to

the point that it is at the expense of involvement with friends

and crowds.

Romantic

Relationships

Selection criteria

• Young adolescents tend to

select partners that bring

them status.

• Older adolescents are more

likely to select partners

based on compatibility and

characteristics that enhance

intimacy.

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• Groups status is measured by a sociometric status

measure: how liked or disliked a person is by his or

her peers

Status in the Group

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• Over the short term, popular and rejected ratings

seem to be stable, while neglected or controversial

ratings tend to fluctuate

• Over the long term, ratings fluctuate more for all

categories, except rejected

Status in the Group

• Popular children viewed as helpful, friendly, and

considerate; however, “stuck-up” behavior in mid-

adolescence can change their status

• Overt aggression is more important in rankings

during the early years

• Withdrawn behavior becomes more important in

ranking someone over time

Characteristics and Predictors of Status

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•Academic Performance Rejected children are more at risk for truancy, repeating

grades, lower GPAs, and dropping out of school

Status and Risk

The relation of children’s sociometric status to academic

and behavioral problems

Children’s sociometric status is related to their future problem behaviors.

Rejected children are far more likely to be held back in, or suspended

from, school, to be truants, to drop out, and to have problems with the

police. The occurrence of any of these problems is labeled as

“nonspecific” in this figure. (Adapted from Kupersmidt & Coie, 1990)

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•Adjustment

Rejected children are more at risk for:

Externalizing symptoms: aggression,

delinquency, hyperactivity, attention-deficit

disorders, conduct disorder, and substance abuse

Internalizing symptoms: loneliness, depression,

withdrawn behavior, and obsessive-compulsive

behavior

Status and Risk

Rates of boys’ self-reported externalizing symptoms as a

function of third grade rejection and aggression

Although aggressive-rejected boys did not differ from other boys in reported externalizing

symptoms in sixth grade, by tenth grade, aggressive-rejected boys reported an average of

over twice the number of symptoms as did all other boys. (Adapted from Coie et al., 1995)

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Aggressive-rejected boys’ reports of internalizing problems increased from sixth to tenth

grade, whereas such reports decreased over the same period of time for all other boys.

(Adapted from Coie et al., 1995)

Rates of boys’ self-reported internalizing symptoms as a

function of third-grade rejection and aggression

(Hard to prove causal relationships)

•Attachment

Secure attachment with parent:

Child develops understanding of reciprocity

Child develops positive social expectations

Child is likely to have confidence,

enthusiasm, and be emotionally positive

Parents and Peer Relationships

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(Hard to prove causal relationships)

•Quality of Ongoing Parent-Child Interactions

Child understands feelings, through discussion

about feelings with their mother

The father adds to his child’s peer relationships

through affection and play

Parents and Peer Relationships

•Models, Coaches, and Gatekeepers

Gatekeepers = parents monitor their children’s

activities

Coaches = parents help children learn how to deal

with unfamiliar peers

Models = children observe how to deal with

people and conflicts

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Percentages of children rejected by peers as a function of

gender and family income

As can be seen in these data from a longitudinal study, elementary school children from

families with low incomes are considerably more likely to be rejected than are children

from middleclass families. (Adapted from Patterson, Griesler, Vaden, & Kupersmidt, 1992)