Chapter 6 Excellence in Business Communication

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471.122005 Winter 8

Business Communication

Providence College471.12

Winter 2005Bruce Duggan



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

8a



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Presentations

Intel



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Exercises

Pg 160



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6A

The move to our new offices will take place over this comingweekend. For everything to run smooth, everyone will haveto clean out their own desk and pack up the contents inboxes that will be provided. You will need to take everything

off the walls too, and please pack it along with the boxes.If you have a lot of personal belongings, you should bringthem home with you. Likewise with anything valuable. I donot mean to infer that items will be stolen, irregardless it isbetter to be safe than sorry.

On Monday, we will be unpacking, putting things away, andthen get back to work. The least amount of disruption isanticipated by us, if everyone does their part Hopefully,there will be no negative affects on production schedules,and current deadlines will be met.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6A

We will be moving on the weekend. Could everyone onFriday clean out their work space and wall space into boxesprovided.

All personal items should be taken with you during the move.The company is not responsible for lost or stolen items.

On Monday we will be unpacking, settling in and returning toprojects at the new building. Production and deadlinesshould be unaffected by the move. To run smoothly we need

you to do your part.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6B

• ?



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6C

For delicious, air-popped popcorn, please read the followinginstructions: the popper is designed to pop 120 mL ofpopcorn kernels…



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6C

Directions:

1. Prior to first use wash chute and measuring cup inwarm soapy water.

2. Preheat the chamber for two minutes with chute inposition.

3. Turn off popper before adding kernels.

4. Do not add more than 120mL of popcorn kernels.

5. Let popcorn machine run till most of the kernels are

popped.6. For additional batches, more kernels may be added

after the first batch is finished.

Most batches make between 3.4 and 4.5 litres.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6C

Precautions:

1. Do not leave the popper unattended while plugged in.

2. Do not use if the cord is damaged.

3. Do not touch the popper while it is hot.4. Do not use if the popper is not working properly.

5. Do not add ingredients such as oil, shortening, butter,margarine or salt to the popping chamber.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6C

Cleaning Instructions:

1. Using a soapy dishcloth, wipe the base of the popperand dry. Do not immerse the popper in water.

2. Wash chute/measuring cup in warm soapy water.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6-3 a, b, c

• ?



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

8b

Active & Passive Voices

Evaluations

Exercises





2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing: Indirect

Bad news

Opening either: - neutral point

- explanation

Body main point

Close end on positive note

―cordial but firm‖



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing: Indirect

Due to a lack of incremental progress in ouroverseas markets, it is necessary to derecruit allworkers with less than one year’s seniority. As a

result, your redundancy will begin in six weeks.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing: Persuasion Messages

Opening capture attention

benefits

Body

build interest

create desire to agree

then >> main idea

Close request action

Text says:



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing

Active Voice• This contract has problems.

Passive Voice

• There are problems with this contract.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing


• You lost the shipment.

Passive Voice

• There are problems with this contract.• The shipment was lost.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing


• You lost the shipment.• We have agreed that our priority is sales.

Passive Voice

• There are problems with this contract.• The shipment was lost.

• It has been agreed that our priority is sales.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing

Active Voice• makes clear

• takes responsibility

If in doubt, be active.

Passive Voice



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing




Passive Voice

To avoid placing blame.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing




Passive Voice

To avoid placing blame.

To be impersonal?



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Writing

Active Voice

This contract has problems

Passive Voice There are problems with this contract.

Use active voice except to avoid

making accusations, attributingcredit or blame, and when usingpersonal pronouns.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

And Now For The News…

Writing good news messages

ch 7



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Good News

Good news for the recipient

Good for the organization?

Who cares?



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Good News

Opening main idea

Body necessary details

Close either: - repeat good news

- ask for action



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Opening

I am pleased to informyou that afterdeliberating the matter

carefully, our humanresources committeehas recommended youfor appointment as staff

accountant.

Congratulations! You’vebeen selected to joinour firm as a staff

accountant, beginningMarch 20.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Body

Everything the reader needs to know

We were impressed by your background and

education —and particularly by the commitment youhave shown in previous jobs.

The starting salary is $36,000 per year, plus benefits. Iwill e-mail you a draft contract tomorrow.

You indicated in the interview that you could start rightaway. I’d like to have you start this Monday. Come seeme at 9 am. I will introduce you to your co-workersand set you up in your office.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Close

A cordial ending

• Next action

• Restate main pointCan be somewhat more personal

I’m looking forward to having you join our company.

Call me if you need a few more days before you beginwork. Otherwise, I’ll see you Monday.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Respond to Complaint

Yes

• Good news

Even if not good news for your company

No

• Bad news



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC


Does fault matter?

• If company responsible

• If 3rd

party responsible• If customer responsible



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC


• Company responsible

Specific News

Apology

Steps

Thank-you

pg 181





2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC


• 3rd party responsible

Honour claim

Honour claim w explanation

Refer to 3rd party



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC


• 3rd party responsible

Honour claim

Simple, cleanHonour claim w explanation

Tricky but sometimes OK

Refer to 3rd party Almost always a bad plan



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC


• customer responsible

Refuse claim

Honour claim



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC



Refuse claim

Why is this a good choice?Honour claim



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC



Refuse claim

Why is this a good choice?Honour claim

How do you point out their mistake?

• Vague repeat?• Specific insult?

pg 182



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

EvaluationsTeam name

Your name

members

Preparation

Attendance

Quality of contribution

Follow-through

above average = 3 average = 2 below average = 1



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Exercises

6 & 7



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Exercise 6b

Enclosed is the manuscript for your book,Careers in Woolgathering . After perusingthe first two chapters, I concluded that

the subject matter – handicrafts andartwork using wool fibres – does notcoincide with the publishing program ofCaribou Press. To date, Caribou Press

has only issued business works.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

6b

Although our firm is currently unable toconsider you work, I have recorded somecomments. I think that feedback can

improve a writer’s authorial skills.I suggest you secure an appointment withan editor at the Red River Press inWinnipeg, who may be interested in the

nature of your work.Wishing you the best of luck in your literaryendeavours.



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC



2005 Winter 8 471.12 BC

Document 6A

We are moving to our new building this weekend.

Please clean out your work space and wall space into theboxes provided. This must be done by Friday.

Take all important personal items home before the move.The company cannot be not responsible for items lost ordamaged during the move.

On Monday we will be unpacking, settling in, and returningto projects at the new building. Production and deadlines

should be unaffected by the move.

a meet ng to scuss r



a meet ng to scuss r.Mactavish's conduct.d.

Competiters were pleasedwhen company sold assets.e.the President's expectationsfor stock dividends increasedwhen financial evidence was

presented

Documents

Chapter 6 Excellence in Business Communication