Clients behavingbadlyppt

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  • 1. Clients Behaving BadlyC-7918Jillayne Schlicke, M.A., PsychologyInstructor Number I-0651CEForward.commortgagefiduciaries.comtwitter.com/jillayne

2. Clients Behaving BadlySpecial Guest SpeakerCathye CarnesHannahs Attic Estate Saleshttp://www.facebook.com/cathye.carnes 3. Introductions Boundaries Market UpdateAgenda Opening group assignments Small group assignmentClients AbnormalityBehaving ValuesBadly Self-Assessment Mental Health DisordersC-7918 Personality Disorders Case Study Revisit CBB Resources Mindset, Blocks, Stages Counseling CBB Large Group Discussion Quiz Recap, Close, Handouts 4. Objective Acquire basic knowledge about commonpersonality disorders in the practice of realestate 5. BoundariesFamilyDiagnose Brokers BB?Clients BehavingBadlyPersonality Time styles Law 6. Opening Group Exercise Break into small groups. Each person shares the mental health problems intheir family Elect a group leader Choose 3 to share 7. Our experiences w/mental healthissues in our families Schizophrenia Phobias PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) Prescription drug addiction Major depression Anxiety Asperger Syndrome (high functioning autism) 8. Schizophrenia PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) I Phobia Prescription drug addiction Anxiety III Depression IIII Autism spectrum I Alcoholism I Bi-polar I OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) I Alzheimers I Dementia Eating disorders Sociopathy II Anxious/fearful personality disorder II Peacemaker. I ADHD learning disorder I Narcissist PD I 9. Our experiences w/mental healthissues in our families Phobias I Schizophrenia IIIII Addiction III Alcoholism IIIIIII Panic I Depression IIIIIIII Narcissism Alzheimers II ADHD Aspergers IIII Anxiety IIII hypochondria PTSD IIIII OCD III Bi Polar IIIIII 10. ContinuumAutism Aspergers Schizo-Affective- Dissociative- SchizophreniaNow known as Autism Spectrum 11. Continuum Neat, tidy Organized - Perfectionist Controlling- OCD 12. Group Exercise Break into small groups. Each person shares their worst client behavingbadly experience. Elect a group leader Choose 1 to share 13. Worst Client Evah! Very volatile up or down. Fun yet unfocused. Highemotions, married to an achieverwould not budgeon price.unable to listenno respect Oldster living aloneyoung couple buyerhusbandhere wife coming w/kids in car. Oldster changed hismind.died Buyer rich immigrantlots of referralspersonalbondthen decided to use another agent.Controlling, domineering,misognywealtharrogant sob Young womanHarvardMsoftbuyerout ofcontrolno respect for contractnoresponseretract offerm-offersno respect forseller..talking w/ seller.own agendaChina Germany phone callshowingPsychcallsdelusional 14. Worst client evah! Buyershowing homes for monthsblack andwhite/all/nothing thinking..no trust.worriedabout taken advantage of.abnormalfearsparanoid?....serious control issues Floor customer.no trustbought FSBOFSBOdouble sold the house.transactionnowtheyve split uplistingmade me feel like theywere suspicious of me. BPO.ignorescalls lisainsteadarrogantspace and time. 15. Threw palm pilot at Realtordaughter stole her moms furniture. Wanted to buy expensive home.Disability paywould makeoffersmaking false offers.lonely? Client purchased homeremodelno permitBrokerliedcontacted brokers mgbroker Lots of phone calls.feedbackmicro-managing the listingbrokerhigh anxiety Warning about a buyer that may have stiffed a landlord rent.scamcar dealership.sketchy persona bit delusional One day upone day downboundaryless-ness Young couple.upper end housewater view3 kids 6-10..kidsrunning wild.footballasked about kids.what problem? Referral.offslightly paranoidvictim...listed large parcel.mustsell.doesnt want to sellknows buyerdoesnt like buyerself-destructive? Buyerreluctant to get prequalifiedunrealistic expectations.verydemanding 16. Worst client Evah! Married sellers hated each other.fight while on the phone.badlanguage House not sellingblue carpetDOL complaint about pressuringthe seller Talked about himself in the third person Aggressivepowerdominance.attorney would re-writecontractliked to argue. Put her past Realtor downeverybodys against metookeverything personallyheld a grudge..depressed, paranoid, lonely Clients outside of the house is in the videodrainagewasoffendedgreed? She actually wanted to not pay for the oldinspection. Resentment Overly controlling..trusthad to control everything Dual Agent.buyer says you were rude.slapped contract on thetable.cultural issue? 17. Worst client Evah! Young couple. Swing set..dont want...changedmindswing set OR ELSE Hispanicsmall house to sellwanted landw/mobilelendingpaystubsdidnt want tounderstand..other Realtor got it done Builder to HW sale (dual agency) wife.didntunderstand buyers have responsibilities.wantedhouse movedread? (could sheread?)complainemotionally dis-engaged. 18. Worst client Evah! Buyer w/family. Mom, dad, daughter, babyhusband is registered offender Hoardercollector30+ yearspitchforks? Paper, garbagelong time to get him out of the housedidnt bother the client Divorcing couple.wife depressed/bi- polardidnt want to sell. Boundaries Ex-pat from Dubai, condo for son to use. Dad buys another condo, son picks it out. Dad getting re- marriedcreepy giftcancellationsdecides to sue. 19. Worst client Evah! Short saleBKdepresseddenialcatsmessy defensive re the cats.feedbackeventually sold Robin.late client Husband shot.lots of anger, aggression. 20. Our experiences w/clients behavingbadlySeller would not move out of the house buyer puts multiple offers on multiple houses without buyingBuyer.husband just left her43 homesundecided.Realtor tellsher what to do.doesnt want to disclose personal info..slightlyparanoid.but eventually purchased.Seller uses n wordfair housing problemgun oncounterinappropriate comments130AM drunk dial rant.nextday.Jesse set boundaries. FTHB 180K approval.anxious to get a house. Impatient,angry,.very little eye contact. Wife did all the talking. 21. Our experiences w/clients behaving badlyClient acting like she had multiple personalitiesDissociative Disorder?Flyer out of the flyer box.would force ppl to tour the housetried to sell her own houseobsessiveReferral from former client.daughter was a narcissist? In lovew/house.biddingcontrolling.Wifecontrollingpossible problem working w/other women?Over-reacting.landscaping 22. Our experiences w/clients behaving badlyAngry client, down market. H&W. OCD, angry paranoid outbursts.SuicideEager buyer, on meds, angry, possible bi-polar?Nice guy, exhibitionist..SociopathicHigh end buyer.cannot commit (narcBuyer he was like a father to me.Alcohol problems? Messy house. Attached to the house.paranoid?Anxious? Angry. 23. Looking at Abnormality Culture Unusualness Discomfort Mental Illness Maladaptive 24. Looking at Abnormality Culture A woman builds a shrine to her dead husband in acorner of the living room and leaves food and giftsat the altar. In some cultures it is encouraged tomaintain psychological ties with dead loved ones. Unusualness Discomfort Mental Illness Maladaptive 25. Looking at Abnormality Culture Unusualness A man who is fascinated with Star Wars, enjoysdressing as a monk, is obsessed with horror filmsand collects WWII model airplanes. Eccentricshave unusual tastes but are generally very happyand function well in society. Discomfort Mental Illness Maladaptive 26. Looking at Abnormality Culture Unusualness Discomfort When a person suffers discomfort as a result ofhis/her behaviors and wishes to be rid of them.(What about ppl who are not aware that theirbehavior is causing discomfort for self/others e.g.a hoarder?) Mental Illness Maladaptive 27. Looking at Abnormality Culture Unusualness Discomfort Mental Illness A clear, identifiable process that is deviant fromhealthy that leads to specific problems orbehaviors. (There is no medical test that identifiesthis physical process. Instead there are a set ofsymptoms.) Maladaptive 28. Looking at Abnormality Culture Unusualness Discomfort Mental Health Maladaptive A person is suffering distress that preventshim/her from functioning in daily life: Physically self-damaging Cause emotional suffering Severely interfere w/daily functioning Individual has lost touch w/reality and cannotcontrol behaviors or thoughts 29. Values What do we value in the practice of real estate? 30. Values Integrity (leads to trust) Responsiveness Loyalty/Fiduciary Respect = Honesty Commitment Generosity Openness Communication.good listener Teamwork Politeness Diligence = Responsibility = hard work Knowledgeable Appreciation Win/win Maintaining professional boundaries 31. Values What do we value in the practice of real estate? Timeliness Patience.amicable.compassionate Honesty Loyalty Boundaries Integrity Communication.know thyself Toleranceflexible Details Direct Knowledge attentiveness 32. Self-Assessment Take the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale 33. Self-Assessment Take the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale Reflect back to the time when you had yourworst real estate client. Were there differentthings going on in your life that would havemade your own stress level higher (besides thatparticular client?) 34. Self-Assessment Take the Holmes and Rahe Stress ScaleAGAIN. Pretend you are your worst real estate client.What was going on in that clients life at the timeof the transaction? 35. Self-Assessment Would you use the Holmes and Rahe StressScale with your clients? 36. Common Mental Health Disorders Anxiety PTSD OCD DepressionChildhood SchizophreniaDisordersEatingDisordersBi-Polar, SubstanceAbuse Mania 37. Common Mental Health Disorders Anxiety Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Depression 38. Emotions Five core human emotions we all feel. No matter where we grew up or our familyculture 39. Joy Anger Fear Sadness Disgust 40. What is a Personality Disorder? A stable, on