Helping Teens Transition into Adulthood

Helping Teens Helping Teens TransitionTransition

into Adulthoodinto Adulthood

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Individual TherapyIndividual Therapy Group TherapyGroup Therapy Parent TrainingParent Training Family TherapyFamily Therapy Couples TherapyCouples Therapy Psychological TestingPsychological Testing PsychiatryPsychiatry


Identity FormationIdentity Formation Involves developing own identity Involves developing own identity

separate from parentsseparate from parents This task can be stressful and lead to This task can be stressful and lead to

confusionconfusion Teen may try many different “identities”Teen may try many different “identities” Happening later in lifeHappening later in life Increased choices and opportunities Increased choices and opportunities

actually makes it more difficultactually makes it more difficult Caught between own identity and Caught between own identity and

following parents’ vision following parents’ vision


Identify Your Teen’sIdentify Your Teen’sStrengths and WeaknessesStrengths and Weaknesses

Identify the specific characteristics of Identify the specific characteristics of your teen and what she will need to your teen and what she will need to learn to succeedlearn to succeed Dependent vs. independentDependent vs. independent Sociable vs. withdrawnSociable vs. withdrawn Persistent vs. gives up easyPersistent vs. gives up easy Disciplined vs. undisciplinedDisciplined vs. undisciplined Resourceful vs. naiveResourceful vs. naive

Match the environment to your teen’s Match the environment to your teen’s style, needs and strengthsstyle, needs and strengths


Resilience FactorsResilience Factors

Social networkSocial network Having a mentorHaving a mentor Having some competenciesHaving some competencies Having good problem-solving skillsHaving good problem-solving skills Having flexibility and tolerating Having flexibility and tolerating

ambiguityambiguity Having good coping skills (e.g. Having good coping skills (e.g.

reaching out, dealing with frustration)reaching out, dealing with frustration)


Teach Your Teen how to Teach Your Teen how to Build a Social NetworkBuild a Social Network

Important for mental healthImportant for mental health Help them find a group to identify Help them find a group to identify

withwith Encourage social activitiesEncourage social activities Encourage involvement in extra-Encourage involvement in extra-

curricular activitiescurricular activities Teach them about how to seek helpTeach them about how to seek help Encourage them to find a mentorEncourage them to find a mentor


Tools for your TeensTools for your Teens Teach how to learn from mistakesTeach how to learn from mistakes

Don’t get angry at your teen for making mistakes, ask how Don’t get angry at your teen for making mistakes, ask how he’ll learn from it and make it righthe’ll learn from it and make it right

Teach how to prepareTeach how to prepare Vocalize your own methods of preparationVocalize your own methods of preparation Have teen practice making a schedule (studying on weekend)Have teen practice making a schedule (studying on weekend)

ResponsibilityResponsibility Be less involved and have teen involved with decisionsBe less involved and have teen involved with decisions Your teen should have chores and household responsibilitiesYour teen should have chores and household responsibilities

Problem solving skillsProblem solving skills Ask for don’t give solutionsAsk for don’t give solutions Empathize, identify problem, identify solution, agree on Empathize, identify problem, identify solution, agree on

solutionsolution


Teach Daily Living SkillsTeach Daily Living Skills

CookingCooking ShoppingShopping Eating habitsEating habits CleaningCleaning LaundryLaundry

Time ManagementTime Management Money Money

ManagementManagement AllowanceAllowance Make own Make own

purchasespurchases BudgetBudget


How Much InvolvementHow Much Involvement

Depends on how your teen is doingDepends on how your teen is doing Don’t check homework assignments, check Don’t check homework assignments, check

AeriesAeries Know where your teen is and with whom, Know where your teen is and with whom,

but let them go outbut let them go out Let them get themselves up and maintain Let them get themselves up and maintain

schedule, but check how they are schedule, but check how they are preparingpreparing

Let them fail or make mistakes within Let them fail or make mistakes within reasonreason


Parent Survival TipsParent Survival Tips

Don’t personalize their attempt at Don’t personalize their attempt at independence: breaking rules, lying, sassing independence: breaking rules, lying, sassing & accusations of stupidity& accusations of stupidity

Balance your involvement and controlBalance your involvement and control Don’t engageDon’t engage Look at the big picture and enjoy your teenLook at the big picture and enjoy your teen Keep up the relationship and be reassuringKeep up the relationship and be reassuring Don’t react negatively to their negative Don’t react negatively to their negative

emotionsemotions Role model healthy habitsRole model healthy habits


Relating vs. ManagingRelating vs. Managing

RelatingRelating EmpathizeEmpathize Communicating: talk, Communicating: talk,

text, email and leave text, email and leave notesnotes

Leisure: attending Leisure: attending sports events, movies, sports events, movies, concerts concerts

Hanging out: Meals Hanging out: Meals together, TV together, TV watching, reading, watching, reading, driving, listening to driving, listening to musicmusic

ManagingManaging Checking up on Checking up on

school workschool work Having teen attend Having teen attend

to chores and to chores and household household responsibilitiesresponsibilities

Corrective Corrective comments comments regarding behaviorregarding behavior

RemindingReminding


Building EsteemBuilding Esteem

Praise & encourage, don’t over do itPraise & encourage, don’t over do it Help build skills and competenciesHelp build skills and competencies Help your teens find their successes, but Help your teens find their successes, but

let them succeed not because of youlet them succeed not because of you Train your teen to cope with failure & Train your teen to cope with failure &

disappointment disappointment Inquire don’t lecture when you see your Inquire don’t lecture when you see your

teen make a mistake teen make a mistake Encourage teen to accept both strengths Encourage teen to accept both strengths

and weaknesses in selfand weaknesses in self


Prepare Teen for Prepare Teen for Romantic RelationshipsRomantic Relationships

Love causes an Love causes an uproar of emotionsuproar of emotions

Birth control and Birth control and condomscondoms

Need to prepare Need to prepare girls against date girls against date raperape


Risks Associated with Risks Associated with TransitionTransition

Drug and alcohol Drug and alcohol abuseabuse

Emotional issues: Emotional issues: anxiety, depressionanxiety, depression

Isolation, Isolation, confusion and confusion and withdrawalwithdrawal

Vulnerability to Vulnerability to abuseabuse

Eating disordersEating disorders


Gap YearGap Year Sometimes teens aren’t ready for collegeSometimes teens aren’t ready for college Can have an internship, volunteering, Can have an internship, volunteering,

traveling or other experience in the traveling or other experience in the interiminterim

Can involve community service, cultural Can involve community service, cultural immersion or language developmentimmersion or language development

Can include some education (including JC)Can include some education (including JC) Can provide some guidance for identity Can provide some guidance for identity

formation or skill buildingformation or skill building Be explicit about your expectations and set Be explicit about your expectations and set

goalsgoals

Documents

Helping Teens Transition into Adulthood