Star Trek

HERITAGE _____

How to Fall in Love in Three

Easy* Steps (*May be Harder Than it Sounds)

By Captain Tristan I. McGregor

C.O. – U.S.S. Panther, NX-90261

As Re-told by T.L. Shull

This short story is a fan written work and is not intended to infringe upon the

copyrights of Paramount Pictures, CBS Corporation, or Pocket Books. It is provided free of charge to all fans for your enjoyment. Unauthorized copying or reproduction

is prohibited. “Star Trek” is a registered trademark of Paramount Pictures and CBS

Corporation.

STEP ONE: Lose Motor Function and Key

Communication Skills the Moment You See Her

"Tell me Lieutenant Commander, what d'ye know

'bout Gallegos and Riker?” asked my long-time friend

and fellow Red Squad mate, Captain Brian Shaughnessy.

He had a thick Irish brogue, shaming my own faint

Scottish lilt. He had a full head of auburn hair and a

freckle-matted face that somehow always seemed to

belie his age. The damn bastard always did manage to

look a decade younger than me. He had been the CO of

the U.S.S. Jaguar for over a year and had already built a

reputation that seemed to come to all of those who

commanded one of the Panthera-class defense ships – he

was a fearsome and formidable commander and fighter,

there was no doubt.

Shaughnessy and I graduated from the Academy

together but he always seemed to manage catching the

promotions ahead of me. Not that I minded really,

Brian‟s own self-confidence lent itself to being seen

first. It‟s not that I‟m not self-confident; I‟m just not

quite as loud about it as Shaughnessy was. In any case,

when Shaughnessy got bumped to the Oberon his career

shot off.

I however got stuck on an exploratory – the U.S.S.

Tallinn – a Helsinki-class deep-space exploratory no

less. In the years I served on her, battle was rarely

encountered therefore there wasn‟t a lot for a tactical

officer to do to show off his tactical skills. Peace was

just part of the plan back then and I was all right with

that.

But Shentaria‟s attacks changed everything.

Exploratories were summoned home and I finally got

a chance to show off the skills that the Red Squad had

pummeled into me; skills that had brought me here, to

this table, talking to my friend who had recommended

me for my new position and assignment – Second

Officer and Tactical Chief of Shaughnessy‟s sister ship

the U.S.S. Panther – the "Pride of the Cats."

I picked up my Andorian tea and took a sip of the

bitter root suspension before looking towards the fire-

eyed captain once again. “Only the tales Captain,” I

answered. “Gallegos has a reputation for being the most

formidable CO on any defense-ship. Seems to be an

understatement considering the ship‟s most recent

skirmishes with the Shents...”

“You‟re right about that I‟ll tell ye,” Shaughnessy

said after setting his own cup of herbal tea back on the

table in the lounge on Starbase 17. It was where all the

Cats were meeting and where I would assume my new

role. He continued, “Gallegos is the best there is Mac.” I

knew that Shaughnessy meant this with every fiber in his

being. Brian only dropped the pretenses when he wanted

to put a fine point on his opinions. “He‟s fair, brilliant

and tough. The Panther leads the Cats and there‟s no one

better t‟ lead the Panther than Gallegos.”

“Seventeen sorties since the invasion of the crabs and

not one ship lost? I‟d say that‟s as good as it gets.” I

replied.

„Crabs‟ was the term most of us had picked up and

used since the species known as Shentarians had begun

their attacks on the Alpha Quadrant. It may not have

been politically correct or very Starfleet-like, but they

weren‟t the typical enemy either. They had made battle

bloody again – somewhat like the generation before us

that had to deal with the Dominion, but these creatures

made the Jem‟Hadar look like amateurs. We were

dealing with a different kind of war. It was a scrappy,

disjointed, multi-fronted effort with heavy casualties on

both sides; and all over a horrible, regrettable and

innocent misunderstanding. I shook my head to empty

the anger.

“Aye…” Shaughnessy said with a bent smile of pride

and mixed admiration. “We haven‟t lost one yet

McGregor - and I don't plan on lettin‟ him down.”

I couldn‟t help but smile at my friend‟s show of

loyalty. I‟m not sure who it said more about - him or

Gallegos.

“But what d‟ya know about Riker?” he asked and I

could see a certain mischievous gleam in his eye. I had

seen that look before and I wasn‟t sure what he was

playing at.

“Other than the fact that she‟s Admiral Riker‟s

daughter? Not much,” I replied honestly, but was

surprised to see my friend grimace immediately after I

said it.

He dropped his voice low. “Do yourself a favor

McGregor and never, ever let those words come out o‟

your mouth…especially if you‟re within a parsec of „er.

Because she‟ll make ye eat 'em…and through a different

orifice than you released 'em.”

Although it was a friendly warning, I could see he

meant it. “I hadn‟t heard she was a hard-ass…” I said

honestly and he laughed out loud.

Shaughnessy looked down to his tea cup and turned it

in a clockwise rotation - three times - some strange

nervous habit or superstition he picked up in the

Academy and never let it go. He smirked weakly. “She‟s

not really. She‟s simply the best I've seen in a long, long

time Mac.”

Again, the reverence in his voice took me aback. “Are

you serious?” I asked.

Brian was the best judge of character I had ever

known. For him to say someone was good was a

compliment…this…this was more than just a

compliment from him. This was as close to adoration I

had ever seen from them man.

“Aye,” he said quietly. “You sound like you don‟t

believe me.”

I licked my lips, not sure how to word my next

sentence then leaned forward to keep my voice from

carrying through the subdued lounge. “Aw come on Irish

- ya canna tell me she got where she is, at the age she is

without a just a little help from the poppa.”

Again Shaughnessy grimaced. “Aye, I am Mac.

You‟re Red Squad…you remember how they treated

legacies, right?”

My stomach actually turned. “I do. Legacies were

made to be broken and usually were.”

Shaughnessy smiled. “So what does it mean to you

when you hear that not only was she Red Squad, but

Leader?”

Commander Elizabeth Riker had graduated six years

after us and I had been too busy to remain in touch with

the RS teams besides my own. I had heard a rumor a

legacy had made Squad Leader, but I hadn‟t realized it

was her.

The Red Squadron took legacies as a challenge – a

person who was meant to be cut down; none of us

wanted to member-up with a "gimme" - someone who

didn‟t actually earn their way in. Legacies always paid

for their familial relationships with a taste of the real

world. For a legacy to not only make the final cut for the

Squad, but to become Leader meant something pretty

unique; she would have undergone some pretty awful

treatment from the brass – but she would have to have

been so impressive she was voted in as Squad Leader by

her peers.

I shook my head with admiration. “I didn‟t realize she

was the one.”

Brian smiled brightly and sat back in his chair.

“Mac…ye should know…Beth Riker‟s me best friend.”

This admission was astonishing. Brian Shaughnessy

was notoriously close-to-the-vest when it came to his

private life. Hell, he considered me a close friend, but

there were still things he and I never talked about. For

him to call anyone his best friend meant things I would

never dare to assume. The look on my face must have

said it all because Brian smiled gently and sipped his tea.

“If that‟s tellin‟ye annathin‟…”

I nodded my head weakly. “Aye – that it does

Irish…” I said as I picked up my tea to sip and ponder

over my new superiors. “…that it does.”

“Well I‟ll be!” Shaughnessy whispered gleefully as he

pushed back from the table. “They‟re early!” he said and

rushed away from his chair.

“Captain?” I asked as I watched him walk away

briskly through the enormous lounge, dodging servers

and patrons alike.

Brian moved straight toward someone I couldn‟t see

from the angle I was sitting, but realized quickly that he

had actually hugged that person and had turned around

and was heading back towards our table. I stood

habitually, first because I could tell that the person was

following him and second because I was so bloody

curious as to whom Irish could be hugging. He was not a

hugging-type person.

But when I stood up, I was almost knocked back flat

by a pair of onyx eyes surrounded by the most beautiful

head of chocolate-tinted satin hair I had ever seen.

I‟m sure Brian said something but to this day I‟ll

never know what it was.

Her smile was genuine yet professional and perfect. I

know I shook her hand and I think I may have muttered

something about pleasure meeting or serving with her or

something, but the only thing that went through my brain

as my heart kick-started back on was –

McGregor ol’ boy? You sir, are in deep, deep trouble.

Step Two

Become Friends (This May be Easier Said Than Done)

My initial reaction to Beth wore off within minutes of

boarding my new ship.

I have a confession to make here and I know that Beth will

forgive me because it‟s really something we have in

common…but…I fell in love with the Panther before I fell in

love with Beth.

There, I said it. It‟s out there. It‟s true.

Beth‟s a CO. She knows exactly what I‟m talking about.

When you‟re born for command like we were, your true love

will always be the ship you call home. There is nothing

simpler than that. My parents talked like that all the time. I

just didn‟t comprehend what they meant until I stepped into

the Panther’s corridors the first time. She was simply…

Made for me.

I don‟t know how else to explain it. I knew she‟d be mine.

I knew it. I didn‟t know how or when and I really didn‟t care

– I just simply knew that the Panther was destined to be mine

until I retired or died.

There were times I knew Beth caught me at the tac station

actually caressing the panels in front of me. I saw her smirk. I

saw her smile, but not once did she ever look at me as if I

were crazy. It was then I began to realize that maybe she

understood it too.

Strangely, I never caught Beth looking at the Panther that

way. Captain Gallegos - God rest his soul – he fawned over

her. His hands were all over her; the doorways, the panels, his

desk, the jambs and especially the command chair. He was

always saying hello or goodnight to her and always seeking

that connection with her that I knew I had as well. In an odd

way – as I sit here in the ready room, in the chair Gallegos

once occupied, I actually know that the Panther misses him

too.

Well…back to what I was saying. Beth loved the Panther

yes, but not like Gallegos and not like me. It was more of a

professional respect I guess. Beth‟s dedication to the crew was

never in question but Beth hadn‟t quite found her home like I

knew I had.

I wanted so badly for Beth to find her home that I pushed

my rising feelings for her deep down and ignored them. I

ignored them because I wanted her to find that same kind of

joy, that same sense of belonging that she deserved so much.

Months passed. Battles were fought and the reasons for

Shaughnessy‟s admiration of his friends and counterparts

became crystal clear: Gallegos and Riker were simply the

finest executive team I had ever seen. They never once

demanded loyalty. They didn‟t need to. By the time Isla

Deneb rolled around…

Isla Deneb…

That‟s a whole other story…as was Telanus…maybe one

day I‟ll talk about those battles, but not here, not now. This is

a happier tale.

Again, by the time Isla Deneb occurred, there was a back-

log of people requesting transfers to the Panther. Gallegos

had managed to become the single-most desired CO in

Starfleet defense-ship history. Only Captain Brint of the

U.S.S. Enterprise counted more requests than…

...

Sorry. I had to break away from writing for a bit.

Sometimes remembering how I fell in love with Beth reminds

me of how amazing it is we were able to find the capacity to

love at all in the midst of all of the death we were facing.

Maybe that‟s why we became friends. I don‟t know.

All I know is that I loved Beth as a friend first.

And I remember the day that I pledged my friendship to

her. She never knew of course, until now, if she ever reads

this.

Some months before that infamous battle we had begun

mok‟bara exercises together in the gym. At first it was a way

to discuss the tactical situation on the Panther without fear of

the constant interruptions we always seemed to get in the

ready room when she had the conn. Staff meetings never gave

us the one-on-one time that Gallegos had trained us all to not

only use, but to actually desire. So we both agreed that our

command briefings would be more affective in the gym and it

worked brilliantly.

But three weeks before Isla Deneb, Beth came to the gym

looking like I had never seen her before. She was sad and

preoccupied to the point of distraction when we began the first

set of flowing mok‟bara moves as we stood side by side.

Normally her stance was balanced and even, but that morning

she went through the moves with no thought, no grace and no

real effort.

I began to speak quietly, “Llewellyn and Actell believe

that the refurb on torpedo tube seven will take less than a day

Commander. I‟ve ordered more quantums and have received

confirmation of their delivery at SB 37. So we‟ll be fully

stocked once again.” I turned to face her and noticed that she

seemed „far away‟. The mok'bara movements were always the

same, but her eyes were focused elsewhere. “Commander?”

She shook her head and then made eye contact with me for

the first time since she had entered the room. Her ink-black

eyes appeared glassier than I had ever seen. “I‟m sorry. Were

you saying something Commander?” she asked.

I smiled kindly, “I was just giving you the morning

briefing Commander. Do you want me to start over?”

She stopped her obviously rote movements and brought

her hand to her eyes and rubbed them softly. “I‟m so sorry

McGregor. I guess my mind was somewhere else. Please go

ahead.”

“Fine,” I replied and the two of us began the second series

of movements again. “As I was saying, the weapons supply

should be at full tilt when we reach Starbase 37. We‟re going

to be down a Weapons Specialist at midship if you don‟t

select one and have him or her on board by the time we depart

the starbase. Did you not get the list of candidates I forwarded

to you for final cut?” Once more her eyes weren‟t on me and

she was definitely not listening. I cleared my throat.

“Commander?”

I ceased moving and found myself watching her instead.

Her soft, thick wavy hair was pulled back and braided into her

usual style, just a braided rope looped and held at the base of

her head. She continued to move without real purpose, only

from the pure memorization of the routine.

“Beth.”

It was probably the first time I called her by her first name.

She stopped cold and looked right at me.

“What‟s bothering you?” I asked.

“What?” she asked.

“I asked…what‟s bothering you? You haven‟t been

listening to a word I‟ve said. Now I know something‟s wrong.

What‟s bothering you?”

Beth looked embarrassed. It was the first time I think I

remember seeing a real look of discomfort cross over her

olive-complexioned skin. It brightened quickly with her blush.

“I‟m so sorry Commander.”

“Look, you can call me Tristan, you know.”

She smiled softly and I could feel my heart start to melt

once again. What kept me from moving my hand to that

lovely cheek and taking her into my arms at that moment I

will never know, but it was one of hardest things I had ever

had to do. This was no longer about attraction, it was

everything about…well…her.

Once again, I asked her, “You can trust me Beth. What‟s

bothering you?”

Her deep, dark eyes lifted sadly to mine and I noticed that

they had filled with tears. “My brother.”

I had never seen her guard down before. There, standing in

front of me, trusting me, allowing me in was the most

beautiful person I had ever known and she was in pain.

“What happened Beth?”

“He‟s missing Tristan. They can‟t find him.” She said with

such torment, such sadness that I found myself feeling it along

with her. I hadn‟t yet met her brother. I only knew he was an

archaeologist with the Daystrom Institute and that he spent

most of his time traversing the galaxy from dig-site to dig-

site.

I didn‟t know what to say. My mind raced for something -

anything - but it would have all fallen out so trite that my

mind found away to kill every syllable before they escaped

my lips. I found myself reaching for and taking her hands in

mine and leading her over to the corner of the gym where the

rest-bench was located. I sat her down and then sat next her,

resting her hands back on her knees. “Start from the beginning

Beth.”

And she did.

It was the most glorious gift she could have given me, that

trust. She told me everything. How her brother was the only

sibling she had left since her sister defected, how she felt like

she had wasted time with him over a hurtful and regretful

fight they had had in their late adolescence, how they had

grown so close since their reparations that she wasn‟t sure

how she would function if he didn‟t survive.

I listened. That‟s all. Just listened.

Four days later they found Bill. He was fine – he had just

been shuttled home by his friend, a rather nefarious trader

named Mel Dwyer that he had gone to school with. Dwyer‟s

ramshackle ship never did have reliable communications and

the Institute finally came across his barely operational craft on

the edges of the Neutral Zone. Luckily they were all safe, if

not a little drunk, and no interstellar political incident

occurred. But Beth‟s relief was apparent.

The day after her brother was found she came to my

quarters. It would be the first of many times we would visit

one another over the course of the next two years; but on that

day she came to my quarters with a bottle of champagne, a

huge and gorgeous grin and the words, “Thank you for being

my friend,” on her lips.

Lips that from that day on I had to fight to keep from

kissing.

Step Three

Don’t Waste Time (Or Learn from My Mistakes)

Without getting into too much detail, the Battle of Isla

Deneb changed my perspective on a lot of things. While my

love for Beth only deepened, making it an issue fell by the

wayside. We both received field promotions after Gallegos‟

death and making my feelings known seemed more

impossible than ever; but it was alright, Beth was still near me

and that was enough to sustain me, although it shouldn‟t have

been.

You see, I almost lost her at Telanus…

Wow – still amazing how just mentioning the word brings

such a strong reaction from my gut. Nothing can describe

how…awful…that was.

Nothing.

Beth was in a coma for a long time. Only once had I made

it to her hospital room when it was free of visitors – usually at

least one of her family members was in the room when I came

to call. I took advantage of the quiet…and I held her soft hand

and allowed my hand to touch her amazing hair and found

myself choking back my tears when I realized it felt softer

than I had ever imagined. The only thing missing was being

able to look into those shattering black eyes.

I whispered to her. I told her how I felt…but she wasn‟t

conscious. I said goodbye to her. I told her it was okay to go. I

told her it was…

Sorry, it‟s still pretty tough to think about those days…the

days I thought she was gone forever. I hadn‟t cried like that

before…

Well, in terms I will only describe as being

overwhelming...Beth didn‟t die. She woke up the following

day and I thought I could never be happier. She returned to

the Panther and our routines started over again – except Beth

started to act differently. Something had changed and my

heart started to wonder – I started to wonder – maybe, just

maybe, she might actually have the same feelings towards me.

Our mok‟bara briefings lasted just a little bit longer; her gazes

toward me were just a little bit stronger; her smiles were just,

amazingly, a little bit sweeter.

If Telanus should have taught us anything, it should have

taught us not to waste time. I should have told Beth right then

and there that I loved her, but "duty" and "Starfleet" and

"professionalism" – they took precedence but I‟m not so sure

love needed to be squelched because of it.

The Panther was still leading sorties against the Shents

and the ever-burgeoning threat of the Thraiin. We couldn‟t

afford to lose ourselves. Maybe we could have, I don‟t know.

I only know that I did what I thought was right at the time.

But I‟ll be honest with you here; don‟t waste your time

like I did. Somehow I think if I had admitted my love for her

sooner – it still would have worked out.

So don‟t waste time. Give in when you can. Don‟t put it

off.

I probably would have lived like that for the rest of my life

– never telling her and just taking her presence as the gift.

Frankly, I began to believe that was just how things were

going to be – until a day when she called me to report to her

ready room.

I turned the conn over to Llewellyn and walked into the

compact office just off the bridge. She was standing behind

her desk and looking rather pale and in shock. I was worried

immediately.

“Captain?” I asked hesitantly as I approached the desk and

the door whooshed closed behind me.

I don‟t think I‟ll remember her looking quite so fragile or

beautiful as she did right then. Her expression was the most

delicate blend of melancholy, distress and joy I had ever seen.

“Commander,” she whispered, “please come in.”

I moved forward and thought about taking a seat but I

wasn‟t sure if she was going to faint or not so I stood right in

front of her desk. “Captain?” I asked again. That‟s when I

noticed that her hand was beginning to tremble and my

concern exploded. “Beth…what is it?”

Her gorgeous smile erupted on her face and she blurted a

laugh that took my breath away. Her laugh never ceased to

make anyone smile. “She‟s mine Tris…” she whimpered. “Oh

Gods…oh Deities! They actually gave her to me…”

Any other person may have had to ask her what she meant,

but I didn‟t. I knew what she meant. The look in Beth‟s eyes

could only mean one thing – it was the look I am sure I had in

my eyes when I strolled the corridors of the Panther the first

time…Beth had just been handed the keys to her home.

While I should have been shattered, most peculiarly, I

wasn‟t. If you could have seen the look on her face – you

might have understood. I found myself feeling a sense of

relief for her. I had been home for three years already; Beth

had been looking for her place for over a decade. Having her

close to me suddenly didn‟t matter anymore. I had yearned

only to see her with that look of …oh what is it?

Completeness? Wholeness? I don‟t know – something like

that.

I cleared my throat, knowing I would be saying goodbye to

her and while the pain washed over me it was back-filled by

my joy for her. “What‟s her name Beth?” I asked.

Beth looked to me and I was stunned to see a tear trickle

from her ebony eye as she whispered so softly …

“Enterprise.”

The word struck me like a cannonball.

I allowed myself to release the laugh that it had loosed

from my gut. I didn‟t need to say anything more. Not only had

Beth found her home, she found her dream home. It didn‟t

surprise me in the least.

Somewhere in the back of my mind something snapped. A

strange sense of freedom crashed into me and at that point I

realized that there might actually be more of a chance for our

love to survive now that she was leaving Panther. I wanted

the shot at that prospect to come as quickly as possible. “I‟ll

lay in a course for Earth Captain.”

Beth could barely mutter a word. “Thanks.”

Seeing her leave the Panther wasn‟t easy and the surprise

of my own promotion only seemed to be a salve in an un-

healing wound. Worse yet – I couldn‟t be with her to see her

take the command of the Federation flagship as we had to get

back out on patrol.

Over the following weeks I found myself most frequently

in my new quarters – quarters that had once been hers and

filled with her things, things I found myself missing almost as

much as I missed her, and I made myself a promise to myself.

That promise was that if I was ever given the gift of

another opportunity to tell her how I felt I wouldn‟t waste it

like I had before.

And I didn‟t.

She may not be in my bed every night but she‟s mine now.

How we got together is for another tale. This is just a

lesson for you – just in case you‟re not sure what to do when

you get knocked flat by the love of your life.

1) Let yourself take joy in being run over.

2) Let yourself take joy in being a real friend.

3) Don‟t waste time. Revel in every small moment for

precious – so precious – they are.