Kampot Survival Guide Issue 24

Things to see and do...Bokor Mountain (The Hill). A National Park,construction site and area of historic interest.Tours can be sorted through the many touroperators or your guest house, although nowyou can again go up alone by hiring a moto(check the map on page 8). Atop the hill arethe ruins of both the French built resort and theKhmer revamp of the site in the 60's. Thestory starts in 1917 when the French foundersstarted the construction of the road, it took sixyears to complete and claimed over a thousandlives. The “Bokor Palace Hotel” opened in1925 and catered for the wealthy, although it

was never used as a casino. In 1940 it closedand stayed so until 1959 when Sihanouk (twiceking and former prime minister) made thedecision to make the site a world class resort.In 1963 the hill reopened with the addedattraction of Cambodia's first casino in what issometimes now called the “new hotel”. Thecomplex continued to operate till 1972 when itonce again closed. Sokha Hotels are currentlybuilding three new hotels and casinos on thehill, one is already open! They also plan toopen a huge housing estate with a prospectivepopulation of over 100.000 people living upthere. So lets hope it's third time lucky cos tillnow the hill has never made buck one!

In this issue...P 18 Things to See and Do.P 813 Do's, Dont's and Local Info.P 13 Daily Events.P 1315 Local Characters.P 1516 Street Food Guide.P 1720 UBoat Gold Hunt.P 2022 Ask Lucky.P 23 Learn some useful Khmer.P 24 Projects & Volunteering.P 25 Transport, Useful Numbers.P 2627 Bars, Food & Rooms, Contact us.P 28 Not a Map.

The Gods practiced first on Heaven, then they made Kampot. Come and see why it's so special.Officially an unofficial guide to Kampot and its attractions, places to go and things to do.KampotKSG Issue 24 September November 2012 FREE

Bokor Palace Hotel 1969

Survival Guide

Usually

$1 where sold

KSG Issue 24 (The 101 Error Issue) September November 2012

2http://kampotsurvivalguide.blogspot.com www.facebook.com/KampotSurvivalGuide/

River, Boats & Trips.The river is really anestuary, thus its levelonly varies with the tideand in heavy rain, it istherefore salty andsupports sea life for thegreater part of the year,fish and crab followingtheir preferred salinelevels through theseasons, Tek Chhou is thebreaking point andbeyond there it's all freshwater. It is very possibleto hire a boat and crewfor the day, ask at yourguesthouse or at one ofthe bars, most will beable to help, but the besttrips by far are those withBart the Boatman092174280. Popular tripsare up the river and itslost turns stopping at a couple of riversideestablishments to refresh, down the river to thesea is good too with a nice view of theCambodian navy and fishing fleets, and ofcourse the sunset cruises. For the early birddolphin watching trips are also possible, checkPrek Thnout Community.Rapids (Tek Chhou). A series of stones inflowing water, a major tourist resort for theKhmer and fun for all, cool crystal clear waterrunning down from the semi demined hills ofBokor. Unfortunately as there are now damsupstream the quantity of flowing water may bedisappointing, but it's still worth a look. One ofthe many Generals here has recently built a spaon the back of this water, he claims it has

health improving qualitiesand has called it "TadaBokor", so we have springwater as well as justbottled now!The Front. The east bankis commonly just termedthe “front” and it's a greatplace to be for sunset anddarling, strolling, rollingand conversing aroundsunset. Most of theforeigner orientatedbusiness' are concentratedalong this strip or near toit, so it's a great startingplace for the evening, lateropening bars tend to befurther from the front, onyour way home!Beach. There are a fewbeaches within spittingdistance of Kampot, thoseat Kep and the so calledsecret (Angkaul) beach, ones to the south ofKampot and those about 17Km toward Snookalong highway 3. There are even tidedependent beaches all along the river, Utopiaand the Green House have their own beachesthat defy the tide. Some of the beaches stillbear the scars of seaweed farming with massesof wooden poles piercing the shallow sea,between them are typical Khmer houses builton stilts, 500m or more out to sea.Fish Isle & Nut Hill. Go over either bridgetowards Snook and turn second left, soon youwill cross a bridge, you are now on fish isle,keep to the main part of the road and eventuallyyou will get to the new trails and then the coast.It's a stunning place to explore with amazing



270° views that are far too good to miss!Caves. There are many caves around Kampot,many have Buddhist shrines with specificpowers, so you may well see people campedthere seeking help for their ailments. Thoughby far the best caves are at Kampong Trach, itmay cost you a little more to get there but itsworth it, about 40km toward the Vietnameseborder.The National Zoo! Along the Tek Chhouroad, just past Utopia you'll find the Zoo. Youcan enjoy the zoo in many ways, it will shockyou but you will enjoy it. It has a surprisinglylarge range of animals from all over the world,most of which you will see as they don't makecages where the animals can hide. Paying asmall extra charge lets you ride your moto, tuktuk or car round the zoo, just to make sure thespecimens are awake. But this is all changingas specialist western zoo keepers have movedin to help, so you ever fancied being a zookeeper, now's your chance, contact Monique atthe zoo and you could be a keeper for a day.Museum. With the recent loss of the culturalcenter in Kampot no proper museums exist atpresent, but lo, we have a saviour in the nameof JeanMichel Filippi. He plans to open aregional interactive museum, he has a websitetoo, check it out.http://kampotmuseum.wordpress.com/Magic (White) Mountain. With a little helpyou may be able to find this one, it's more of ahill than a mountain but its still a sod climbingit, scattered around the hill are shrines and atthe top you may well meet the witch and hertwo followers, don't piss them off as the spellsthey cast are good.Waterfalls. The falls are seasonal here, thereis little point in visiting during the dry seasonand they can be hard to get to in the wet. Mostmoto drivers and all guides will know how to

get you to the most popular ones, at worst itshould only take you two hours to walk tothem, though much longer if you are stupid anddecide to wear flip flops. It's said that one set offalls has been seen by less than 10 westernerssince its discovery in the early 1900's, so don'tbother asking where they are.Trekking. Use guides and stick to the paths,take the given advice, if you plan to do the hillcontact the Rangers or a tour that uses them, it'sdangerous up there so take sensible things withyou, ipods rarely save lives.Dams and Lakes. A series of small dams haverecently been repaired just outside Kampot,they were originally built as a KR project andnever a secret lake, but they lasted till the late90's when one failed. Now they are rapidlybecoming touristed with a small selection ofbars n cafe's skirting the edges of the reservoirand the durian plantations. Rubber rings andpeddilo boats may be hired though the sceneryshould be enough to keep you happy. To getthere head towards Kep and turn left at therhino, then go straight on till you see the water,easy. Up the river from the rapids the Chineseare constructing a huge dam, we all hate it tooLegend of Kampot termsPot = Kampot. Potpat® = xpat living in the Pot.Snook = Sihanoukville / Kompong Som (where Potpats go to die). Bodge = Cambodia/Cambodge. GH =Guesthouse. PP = Phnom Penh. Fish Isle = KohD'tray. Nut Hill = Phnom Dung. Nuts = Coconuts.Snail = Backpacker. Boom boom = body cavity orsausage massage. Gaylim = daelim from Kep or withbasket. Taxi girl/boy = body cavity or sausagemasseur. Repeat offender = tourist or xpat that keepsreturning to the Pot. JF = KSG's first ace reporter,Jack the Father. Glue = tobacco substitute. KSG =Kampot Survival Guide. XPot = X Potpat. The Hill= Bokor Mountain. Poofta = one who is kepish or notreally trying (Belgian in origin). Pirate = someone ona boat trip. KFC = Kampot Football Club.



as it's flooded us all at least twice, but thefinished project will produce 180MW with justthe small cost of 2K hectares of national park.Pagodas. Look for the tell tale fancy gates andsoon you will see the Pagodas, the monks arealways happy to see you and practise theirEnglish, do wear suitable clothing whenvisiting, don't show too much flesh that is.Secret Pagoda. It's not really a secret andhardly a pagoda, but it's one of the seven secretplaces the Pot used to boast (the not so secretlake was never one of them!). There are twoways of getting there, walking or riding, I

know which method I would choose cos it's upa steep hill. To get there head up towards therapids, if you plan to walk the turning you wantis a left before the zoo, riding you go for theleft turn after the zoo, there is a statue of ayoung prince on the way up, he eventuallybecame Buddha. Take a camera as the viewsare stunning.Bird House. Thanks to the Chinese influencein Kampot we have many bird houses thatproduce a truly Chinese delicacy, birds nestsoup. Some of these houses are make shift andothers are specially built for the job. On the TekChhou road next to the generator plant a hugebird house has been built, just look for a bighouse with no windows. They simulate caveconditions and tempt the birds in by playinglooped bird calls, playing loudest at sunriseand sunset.Bridges. We have 3 of them, all can be walkedbut by far the most fun is the railway bridge,take a walk over it and check out the battledamage. The new bridge is now a fashionablemeeting place for kids, especially now it hasnew road markings, painted on just over a yearafter its opening. The old bridge is still just adeath trap, be careful in the wet or at sunset!Railway Station. Futuristic design in acorrugated rust peppered steel shell. For a tasteof how good this station is check out the one16Km towards Snook, it's just off the mainroad and somewhat lacking in the walls androof departments, but it still makes a crackingpicture. A company called Toll Holdings wonthe concession to revamp these lines over fouryears ago, they promised we would have aworking train system within two years thatwould speed us to pp in about three hours, weare still bloody waiting!Bamboo Train. Running on the main rail lines(where available) these small make shift trains



are/were available forrent, tour groups andmoto drivers know/knewhow to get you rolling onone of these motopowered trains, rumoursalso suggest you may wellbe able to enter Vietnamby one, though thelegalities are somewhatdoubtful.Port. A deep water portis under construction notfar past the entrance toBokor, no prizes forguessing what traffic theyare looking for, yep cruiseships to fill the newrooms and casinos on thehill, although they dohave a free trade zoneplanned too. It could bean interesting trip if youhave never seen a portbeing built.Kampot Airport, KMT (Daelim DragracingTrack). Along the Tek Chhou road andopposite the school is the old air strip, or as wehave it now the Daelim drag strip. Recently ithosted trials between the cream of Kampot andthe best of Snook. Expect more action soon asthe national league is formed, also expectKampot to be atop of this league.Pepper. Bloody good pepper is grown in theseparts, probably the best in the world! Basictours are available everywhere but for the fullstory contact "Sok Lim Tours" as they areplanning specialised tours. So go out to aplantation and see how it's grown and don'tforget to buy some before you leave here.Durian (the king of fruits). This is what the

area is famous for, the worlds best durian fruit.A spiky smelly fruit, eat with your mouth notyour nose! There are many plantations alongthe Tek Chhou road to the rapids.Salt. This is a major Kampot export, south ofthe city are many salt flats skirting the coastsand the salty rivers, some of the easiest to seeare on fish isle, second left over either bridgeand straight on, or just head south along theeast bank of the river. There is a theory riceproduction is about to be started in these veryareas, the worlds first ready salted rice will beKhmer!Pot Holes. The pot hole was invented inKampot and is still it's greatest export. Initiallydevised for traffic control it's popularityrecently soared with Cambodia's adoption of



"free range golf". A game where you hit a golfball in any direction with the intent to end itstravel in a pot hole.Water Sports. The world is your lobster herewith an ever expanding choice of ways to playin the river. At present we have canoes, speedboats, jet ski's, wind surfing, water skiing, kitesurfing and more, check out the ad's or listingsfor more details.Aquatic Centre. The National OlympicCommittee of Cambodia has just opened thecountry's first Aquatic Centre here in the Pot,it's intended to give training for rowerscompeting in the Olympic, SEA and AsianGames but will eventually be used forrecreation and tourism. So get down there andcheck out the dragon boats.Boxing. Official boxing events do happen herebut not often, though it's far more likely youwill see bar owners squaring up to each otherlate on the front, this is all part of the build upfor Kampot's Inter Bar Boxing Championshipto be held next season, Snook has a similarproject for sumo and Kep is going the mudwrestling route.Football. You can often catch a game at theOlympic stadium near the main traffic circle,

there has even been a couple of tournamentsthere, so check it out it could be fun.Volley ball. Sporadic games are played at thewaste ground near the old bridge, find a goodmoto to lean on or sit on the wall.Pétanque/Boules. A game played with metalballs and becoming increasingly popular in thePot, you will see many locals lobing balls intheir spare time. There are plenty of pitchesaround that you may be able to get a game,though the easiest to find are at the Boules barand Blissful GH.Badminton. Epic Arts performance centre hasfacilities for playing, equipment may be hiredand booking in advance seems like a good ideato avoid disappointment.Gym. There is no official gym in the city,Orchid guest house used to have some weightsand a bench, Utopia has a make shift jungletype gym with the extra attraction of trainingwith Max the knife. Recent reports suggestthere may well be a boxing style gym openacross the river, it's on the Tek Chhou road andbetween the bridges.Fishing. It's possible but don't expect to be asgood as the locals are. Ultimately fishing onlygives you practise at waiting, that's why it's notcalled catching.Golf. No we do not have a course yet but oneis in the way, on fish isle so we are told. Theclosest golf may well be the crazy golf courseat the "Magic Sponge". For a proper courseyou'll have to go to PP.Swimming. Swimming within the city limitsis strictly prohibited with the exception of theriver, which has been designated the officialswimming pool, several bars have offered freebeer to the first to swim a length. But do bearin mind the nature of the river and its tidalcycles before jumping in, the tide means thatshite dropped in the river during the dry seasonhangs around, so it may be better to headfurther up the river, or to the rapids or thebeach.Swimming Pools. Borey Bokor I has a poolwhere you can pay per day, the cost may be ashigh as $5 per a day. Pools further out includeVilla Vidici and Nataya, with almosteverywhere in Kep having pools, but accessmay be limited or expensive.Pool. There are but a few tables in the city andall of them are obstructed. A couple of Khmerplaces have rough ones, Bodhi Villa has areasonable table upstairs, the Magic Sponge,Wunderbar and Madi's also have tables of



differing qualities.Palm Wine. A natural and traditional localdrink, best taken close to where its made, anymoto or tuk tuk driver will be happy take youout to try some, but be careful it's surprisinglystrong and smells like sour milk.Rice Wine. This fella can really batter you, it'sbloody cheap and well strong, many Khmercafé’s will have large jars full of the stuff,usually with strange additives in them, like oddvegetables and dead reptiles, caution isrecommended.Shopping. Almost everything is available inthe mass of shops between new and old bridgestreets, the market etc. There are alsosupermarkets, OK, well two and they are onthe main and the salt workers traffic circles.Market. What can I say, markets are marketsand are the same the world over, crowded hotand cramped, but you can buy cheap food andall sorts of goods there.Old Market. Piercing the front is the end ofthe old market, it has been home for thehomeless but most recently its was used forboat storage and indoor volleyball matches, wethink the boats may have been rescue boats forthe rainy season. Soon though the market willreopen as stalls are now on sale, get in quick if

you want one!Hospital. Between the old and new bridgesyou will see the hospital, it's been under heavyconstruction and is filling us all with hope asmany forign nationals have been stocking it upwith new high tech equipment. Remember it isa referral hospital so it may well be closedwhen you have your accident. Near the newbridge road is a flash clinic that has been usefulfor filling the out of hours gap. Best of all is thenew Sonja Kill Memorial Hospital near to theBokor Hill entrance, it currently has out patientservice from highly qualified western andKhmer Doctors. So now we have a choice!Prison. Well worth a look, see just what youcan expect if you seriously cross the line here.On average there are two westerners in theprison all the time, so be good! Prisoners areoften seen around town working in sort ofchain gangs, but without the chains, it seemsnone of them try to escape. It's usually OK totake pic's but if they're on guard, ask first.Pond (mosquito farm). Just back from thefront is the pond, it's a pretty spot and quitepicturesque, it may even be worth fishing there.Massage. You are spoilt for choice here butmy Xwife's particular favourite is the SreyChann 017621958, she has a shop just roundthe corner from the post office. Seeing HandsVb is next to BarRed and is good.Fragrance offersstylishsurroundings andsimilar wares andis one street backfrom the front.Manicure. A latenight emergencyservice is nowavailable at the



new clinic, for standard service try TokyoSalone opposite BarRed or Jolie Jolie nearParis GH..Betting. Once upon a time the governmentlicensed betting offices, this avenue of pleasurehas now been taken away from the averageKhmer, religion may well be the only gamblethe Khmer have left. But down at the bordercrossing things are different, in nomans landthey have built several casinos, one even has abooking office near to the bus station, pop in ansee what offers they have. A new hotel andcasino has just opened on the hill, it's not in avery picturesque spot, but casino's don't needviews.Cyclo Rides. Due to the eccentricities of PotPats Kampot now has Cyclo rides on offer, youmay even be able to rent one to get a real tasteof work, so go and get sweaty.Moto Rental. It's popular, it's fun and it'sdangerous. Motos are cheap to rent and veryavailable, the roads however are pretty bad andlocal traffic rules will evade you, so go slow,watch out for cows n kids, go really slow ondirt roads or in the rain and always show thePotPats your latest wounds.

Dirtbike Rental. Dirtbikes in Cambodia areinherently gay as everywhere a dirtbike goes, aDaelim has been before, probably carrying 4people and all their luggage. They are howeveravailable for rent, be careful.Cinema. We now have a cinema, twenty threeyears after our last one closed its doors.Situated between the front and the 2000monument Ecran offers scheduled screeningsand also offers a private viewing room. Intimes gone by Kampot hosted four cinemas,two of which you can still see, one of them, theRoyal Theatre was reopened to hostCambofest, an international film festival backin 2009.Nightlife. The Pot has a full compliment ofnightlife available, with late night bars, foodand now even a night club.Live Music. Several warring factions ofmusicians have graced Kampot bars this year,almost all of them so expect to hear live musicdrifting along the river and side streets. Sadlyno real battle of the bands has occurred yet,though we are told Pot musicians are in themiddle of a price war. Weekly music nightsinclude: Thurs Madi bar, Fri Bodhi Villa, SatABC, Sun Green House.Karaoke. There are many opportunities tosing your heart out in Kampot, most suchestablishments dot the outskirts of the city but afew have sneaked within the city limits, to findthem hire a Tuk Tuk or follow the noise, but beaware these places are there to make money,this is done via hostesses or inflated prices.Boom Boom (Sausage Services). There aremany venues for internal body massage withinthis fair city, currently over 15 and normallyaimed at a quick fire one stop service. Don'tever think it's like Thailand, Snook or PP, it'sKhmer style business, Mc Donald's of the east.Just look for red lights at night (with theexception of the red neon bar sign!) or visit oneof the many late night Karaoke bars. Oh, andthere is no truth in the rumour that you win abadge for doing all 15 in one night. Whateveryou do, always use a wilkinson (love sock)!Gay. Kampot now has a thriving gay scene, somuch so that there is little point in going toKep any more. Sadly there are no set bars orclubs to accommodate the masses, though theDragon Club does its best. So you will have tolook around, thankfully all bars are gayfriendly.Kep. Day trips are OK but furtherinvestigation seems unnecessary, unless you're



a loner or a romancing couple wanting to getaway from it all. All that said, Kep has someodd qualities that strangely shine through,empty houses, trails and beaches make for easyand pleasurable exploring, also with businessesin Kep being an average of over 1km apart youwill get some maybe needed exercise.Do's, Dont's and Local Info...

The King. Probably the coolest King in theworld, never seen without a smile and anencouraging word, truly a great man. He alsohas a cracking sense of humour, and althoughhe lives in Siem Reap we know he has a softspot for the Pot. It's OK to ask questions aboutthe King, everybody seems to love to talkabout him, my Xwife has even had anaudience with him, a joking and laughingaffair. See, it's not odd here like it is inThailand.Locals. Generally very friendly, all will wantto help you, many will want to practice theirEnglish on you so be prepared for a slow startto the conversation, and watch out for the kidsand their “hello ambushes”.PotPats. Many PotPats grace Kampot, some

working on projects and manning the manywestern businesses, others eke out an existencein unknown manners, all will be bored of traveltales and backpacker woes, but most will alsobe happy to talk to interesting folk for the priceof some beers.Beggars. Stump envy has hit Kampot withable bodied beggars renting crutches, be sure tocheck the quantity of limbs before donating tosome of these beggars, but don't forget somepeople rely on these donations for survival,there are no pensions or free health service'shere.Backpackers. Known as snails to PotPats,pregnant if wearing two backpacks (when seenwithout backpacks they are sometimes callednaked or slugs). Usually seen walking fromGH to GH while fully packed, being too damntight to pay for a moto driver or tuk tuk thatwould help them (yes you, put my guide backyou tight git!). Generally welcomed in citybars as long as the money is good, rumours ofbackpackers being shot on sight in Kep areunfounded.Hippies. Several have been sighted during thepast few months but in vastly diminishingnumbers, the secret eradication scheme seemsto be working, a local spokesman states: “Weare glad to see an end to the 'Suspected HippiesIn Transit' problem”.Backpacks. Contrary to common backpackerbelief, you do not need to carry a backpack allthe time in Kampot, nor do you need to carrywater bottles. In seven years of living here Ihave never needed more than pocket space forall necessary items, if I need a drink I buy onefrom the many vendors, and it's cold too!Sun. A bristled head is not adequate UVprotection so always wear a hat, localsunblocks also have added ingredients you maywish to avoid, i.e. bleaching agents to whitenyour skin, so watch out.Money. The power of the dollar is failing, thussome establishments will offer you exchangerates as low as R3800 to the $1, it's a good timeto switch to the Euro.Haggling. Bartering is expected in markets,it's fun and should find a price both parties arehappy with, but if you see a price listed that'sthe price you pay.Smokes. Cigarettes are cheap and plentifulhere but watch out you don't run short late atnight, or you may pay some guy on the streetdouble price for an open pack.Glue. Smoking weed in Kampot is generally a



no no, a few places may allow you to smoke inan out of the way place but ask first, further outof town it's less strict. Don't forget it's illegal tosell weed in Cambodia, so don't bother askingthe PotPats to sell you some, you won't getany and you will get offended.Beers. Draught beer has hit Kampot, currentlywe have three different flavours, CambodiaBeer, Anchor and Angkor, my fave isCambodia as it's the only one thats owned byCambodians, Anchor is brewed under aSingapore license and Angkor is owned by theDanes and Malaysians. Many canned andbottled beers are available to suit all tastes, butthe local fave is Anchor cans, it separatesresidents from tourists who insist on drinkingAngkor, sometimes in big bottles, warm beerusers are odd!Water. Don't drink the tap water, old old story,but you can purify it by adding two parts vodkato one part tap water. Bottled water is availableeverywhere, even the cheapest is OK but tastesdiffer, just look for shops with an orange icebox outside, and to be honest, I have foundnowhere in the Pot where you can't see coldwater for sale, so it's silly to carry water withyou.Food. All the food is good here, the ice is

good too, so don't be a poof about it. Mostbusinesses serve food till about 21.30, if youmiss that window of opportunity not all is lostbut your choice drops dramatically, check outthe street food guide later in this rag.MSG. Manmade salty gravy, not seen in mostrestaurants due the the availability of freshproduce, however it's totally necessary oninstant noodles.Toilets. There are no western type publictoilets in Kampot, but all proper bars havethem, phew! Khmer toilets are everywhere,every bush, tree and sign is fair game.The Bum Gun. Possibly the best inventionever and has made possible the true paperlessoffice. Warning, Kampot is now a high waterpressure area so be careful while practising,turn on a tap to help reduce the spray pressure.It's other uses are many fold and range from theintended bum cleaning to ant control, butpossibly my fave is mosquito killing, use thegun to shoot the buggers down and let surfacetension do the rest.Doctoring. There's a Pharmacy on the maintraffic circle, its a well stocked first call, fromthere its possibly best to check the new clinicnear the new bridge road or the Sonja KillMemorial Hospital, from there PP and then



Bangkok, best of all just don't get ill. Even ifyou are not ill you could always just have amedical treat, you could have an xray or bodyscan for $10 or so, so go on, spoil yourself.Dehydration. This is what we all have towatch out for, it's all too easy not to drinkenough, eventually you stop sweating andoverheat, cooking yourself. So keep the fluidscoming in.Elephants. No we do not have our ownelephant but we do have one visit from time totime, it comes from Chook and pops down witha magic medicine man selling charms to themasses, it usually stops at the market but hasbeen sighted on the Tek Chhou road headingfor the rapids, probably on the way for a swim.Dangerous Animals. Reports of crocodile andshark attacks in the river are unproven, tigerand bear on the hill also have a disappointinglylow body count, the last elephant reportedapparently packed its trunk and headed off tojoin the circus, snakes and spiders are rarelyseen due to their prominence on local menus,so it's unlikely you'll have any animal problemshere, it's far more dangerous riding bikes.Dogs. Now these can be a problem. MostKhmer families have dogs (actually all dogs inCambodia have the same name, dog,pronounced “ch kai”) and at night they putthem on the streets to protect their property.Problem is that the later it gets the more thedogs protect, they form packs, gangs and sendcoded messages across town coordinating theirattacks. When staggering home late, walk inthe middle of the road with a confident pace, ifyou are hounded turn round sharply and cockyour arm ready to throw imaginary stones atthem, it works. If you do actually get bittentake it seriously and get rabies shots, preferablyin the Pasteur Institute Phnom Penh, get them

straight away and they're cheap, wait and youwill get a huge bill or die.Cats. Most cats here are genetically stunted,well their tails are. They are not mutilated atbirth as some think, they actually come out thatway, poor sods. It seems they were introducedby the French along with sparrows andpigeons, but in insufficient numbers so theirgene pool is very limited.Malaria/Mosquitoes. There are no majormalaria problems in Kampot, there are howevermany mosquitoes so get some deet on. If youintend on doing the hill put lots of deet on asthere you can actually get malaria, oh and don'ttrust the local medicines as many are Chinesefakes, as they are too in many of the localclinics, so beware!Ants. All ants are bastards, ask any local orPotPat. Avoid encouraging them by notbringing food into your room, protect yourdrink with the condensation formed on yourglass, produce a small puddle and the ants willleave your pop alone. Try not to stand in thesame place too long, ants attack feet regularly,watch out for tree ants too, they're big red andusually attack from above. Local kids havefound offensive uses for these savage creatures,it has been known for people to be hit by antbombs, whole nests of pissed off tree ants arethrown at their intended target, devastating.Coconuts. Nuts are a real problem, they claimas many as 600 lives each year in Thailand, soavoid loitering around the bottom of nut trees,unless you want to help us beat the Thai's.Lightning. More than 100 deaths every wetseason, and the last one was quite an averagewet season! It's a good idea to think aboutwhere you are standing when it rains.Statues. Most road junctions are marked witha statue, it makes sense when a large part of the



population cannot read, it makes it possible totravel long distances without maps or signposts, i.e. go straight on at the rhino and thenturn left at the horse.Walking. It's safe walking in Kampot, but acouple of bag thefts have been reportedrecently, this is new and a very rare thing, sodon't panic! Just avoid using bags, if you needa bag look after it and only put the things youneed in it.Parking. Generally its OK to park anywherein Kampot, but do have a look to see if you areparking in someone's drive, Khmer get pissedoff if they can't get their land cruiser in thedrive, PotPats throw rocks at you, parking canbe tough in some areas! So park outside thebusiness you are visiting, or along the riverside of the front. As to parking yourself it's bestto take a room, sleeping out may cost you a lotmore in fines!Electricity. Do not bet on the timing or lengthof power cuts, the supplier and Cambo 6 havethe system rigged.Street Lighting. Don't expect any and youwon't be disappointed. Some of the main areasnow sport fancy lanterns and make forfavourable routes across town, but sadly the

majority of the city is without. Take a torchwith you if you are staying out of the way andplan to be out late. Kep has recently installedstreet lighting along its beach front, this is notfor the pleasure of tourists but to attract crabs.Banks. There are two main banks in Kampot,Acleda and Canadia, both should be able tohelp. Canadia Bank also has a new ATM thataccepts all major cards with the ATM at Acledaonly accepting Visa cards. A new bank withATM has just opened on the PP road towardsthe market, too much choice!Post Office. Ah, opening times, er well this isCambodia and things don't always run to stricttimetables, but the best time I have found ismid morning, after that you are in unknownterritory. The office will also close for everypublic holiday and half excuse.Photo Shop. There are a few capable photoshops in town, a couple on the main trafficcircle and one past the market.Internet and International Calls. There aremany net cafés in the city, some of them beingsituated along old bridge street and some on ornear to the front, all should be able to handlevoice over internet calls, CD burning, printingand basic surfing.Book Shop. There is the newsagent near themain traffic circle and Kepler's books oppositethe old market, some guest houses also sellbooks.Newsagent. Near the main traffic circle is anewsagent, its well stocked in Kampot termsand can be handy if you really want a copy ofthe previous days news, yes they keep them forodd sods like me.TV. We have cable TV here but the channelselection is limited, retune your set to accessany new channels available. Pay per view isavailable for channels not normally supplied, acase of Anchor usually does it.Radio. There is one radio station you canreceive on FM, Kampot's local one in Khmer,short wave gives you more choice but you canstill only get 12 hrs of BBC.Weather. “There are holes in the sky wherethe rain gets in, but they are only small, that'swhy rain is thin” words of wisdom by SpineMillington. According to our weather teamrainy season is here, so expect to get wet. If itdoes rain on you remember to claim your visarefund, $5 for each day of rain, be sure to savesome rain as proof. Joking apart the rainalways warns you when it's coming, if the windgets up, take cover!



Police. If you manage to get entangled withthe police its probably best to get yourguesthouse involved, do tell the PotPat's too asthey love a good laugh, and don't expectsympathy from anyone, its a Khmer way tolaugh at such things, especially death.Theft. There is very little theft in Kampot, buttry not to put temptation in people's way. Yourshoes however may well be in danger, this veryreal threat is from drunken backpackers, sowatch out!Politics. There are three main parties operatingwithin Kampot province, the “TupperwareParty” the “Anne Summers Party” and the“Fancy Dress Party”. It's best not to go too farinto Khmer politics, just accept it.Corruption. There is no corruption inCambodia, none at all! The country, like all ofits neighbours, is commission based, that's whyit's so easy to do things here, everybody willhelp you because they earn a small fee for theireffort.Commission. Please refer to corruption.Daily Events...Darling. A daily slow motorbike race comestunt bike trials along the river front, displaysevery night all along the front at sunset.

Fishing Boat Race. “Goksok” is the currentleader of the league but competition is hottingup, every afternoon around 5pm they racedown the river to the rich pickings of the sea,it's a nail biting thriller that sets the frame forsunset and the end of another hectic day.Traffic Circle. Occasionally there areconcerts, fairs and promotions at the maintraffic circle, there may be live music, films,stalls and games to play, so get down there ifyou suspect something maybe on.Shrimp Fishing. Every evening you will seemen with miners' lamps scouring the riverbanks hunting for shrimp. Its worth a look asthe guys are always friendly.Fruit Stalls. Every evening old bridge streetfills up with fruit shake stalls, various strangefruits are converted to fluid before your veryeyes, it's worth a look.Line Dancing. At sunset in the park behindthe old market local fatties attempt to looseexcess weight, it's a serious affair and costsmoney to join in, though it's enough fun justwatching. Local Characters...$100 Prize offered for the first reader withconfirmed sightings of all listed characters,tick them off as you go, preferably withphotographic evidence and thumb prints.Note: We no longer list Khmer characters dueto local western liberal minded, do gooder,racist, NGO type complaints. Crazy Frog. There are two contenders forthe title of “crazy frog”, neither are French butboth mimic their chosen idol closely, rarelyseen together but both parade the river frontalmost daily. Push Bikie Man (AKA Jack the Father orJF). Sweaty skinny foreigner always seenattached to some form of pedal poweredtransport, Bokor Hill is no challenge for thisguy so his local knowledge of impassable trailsis unsurpassed within the Province, oftenoffensive to tourists and PotPats alike,approach with caution. Racy Dog. Racy patrols a beat around the2000 monument, he is currently unbeaten byany form of motor transport, probably all youwill see of him is his clean pair of heels as hepasses you. Bag Lady. Seen cruising the streets on amodified bicycle with basket, has a totalobsession with plastic bags but is rarely seenwith any, contact should be avoided.



Mr Tongue. Seen performing at the home ofgurning, a somewhat corroded establishment.Observed clearing his or others nostrils withhis tongue, a must see. Mr Spoons. Utilising the latest spoon tuningtechniques, Mr Spoons is devising newmethods of mine detection and destruction.This pasty munching spoon playing jeep ridingfella should be avoided in polite conversation.Last seen performing Indiana Jonesimpressions along the front. Predator. Following his successful moviecareer Predator has settled in the Pot, truth betold he actually twatted Arnie, anyhow youmay catch sight of the big man either on landor water as he is a nautical type and mostlyfriendly. Bat Woman. Working a beat from the Pot toPP Bat Woman dispatches mosquitoes toBuddha for rapid reincarnation, sometimesseen wheilding two bats in a martial artsfrenzy, somewhat akin to the star wars movies,at selected bars only. Ringo Starr (AKA Crash Test Dummy).This jovial fellow has crash tested most moto'son hire in Kampot, he will gladly show you hislatest wounds at a local guest house, totallyharmless and answers to “Eric”, though in an

angry fashion. Sand Man. Often seen scooting around onwheels or rowing his boat, usually looking forlost shoes and food. Like most Scots he hasstrange sleeping habits so also look for him insand piles, ditches and drives, friendly to all. Gnome. Can be seen traversing the roads lateat night in search of fluids, this rain readyfellow has aspirations of being a jockey, sonever turn your back on him, he also attemptsterminator impressions, usually friendly andmostly harmless. Vibro Man. Submitted by David of HInfamy's Spouse. This guy patrols the taxiranks practising his Bilbo Baggins impressions,requiring vast amounts of fluids for theseperformances he may well apply to you forsponsorship, and if he likes you he might evenshow you his collection of vibrating electricalappliances, unmissable! Comba Crew. This trio of musically mindedfolk perform mime and air guitar whilstkeeping their eyes closed in fear of popping.Seen most evenings at musically minded bars. Gandhi Man. This spindle legged fellow canbe seen during the early evenings, usually cladwith some form of writing and willing to sellbooks to anyone, friendly and usually harmless. Sausage Hunter (AKA Head Hunter). Thismainly nocturnal lass can be seen scouting outnew happy hours and local bars. Well versedwith the worlds mating rituals and habits thislass tracks down and secures her kills beforeclosing time. Approach with caution. Rubber Band Man. This flexible fellow isin training to become a one man band,confirmed sightings are sporadic butrewarding, dependant on his fluid level.Friendly but don't mention the ashes!By Steve J (with a "P")

KSG Users Comments...A truly great beer mat substitute, J.S, UK. Invaluablein a country without toilet paper, A.M, SA. I couldn'tread it but it stopped my table wobbling, W T Spain.Your guide is useless in Sihanoukville, M.H, USA.Pirates stole my copy! P.S, UK. My copy has killed atleast 50 mosquitoes, L.F, France. Where can I buy acopy of the legendary issue 4? S N, Snook. It's too thinfor roaching, F.T NL. Promise you will never translatethis into French, B.M. Fra. You never warned me aboutwasps, can I sue? A.T. Aus. I extended my pleasure ofyour guide by soaking it in petrol so it burnt longer,T.W. Kep. I'm confused! F.G. Pot. When foldedcoffectly the rag makes a good weed pouch, J.B. USA.



Kampot Street Food GuideCheap Eats For About A Dollar.

Spam Baguettes: half or full bread roll withtwo or three kinds of highly processed wtfersatz meat (allegedly pork), shallot, cucumberand tomato with sweet or chili sauce. Price:R1500 to R2500. Where: all around Kampot(look for the stack of baguettes on an amblingtrolley) but centralized around the main trafficcircle and down old bridge road in theevenings. SB’s are also available in chickenand pork versions but while the meat isrecognizable, they are more expensive andmeat portions can be parsimonious.Fruit Drinks: identifiable and exotic fruits ofyour choice are placed in a blender andemulsified with sweetened condensed milk,coconut milk, sugar, Milo, ice and possibly anegg. Tastes a lot better than it sounds butinsulin dependent diabetics should approachwith caution. Price: R2000. Where: on the oldbridge road and on the Kep road just past theTwo Cows intersection and on a peripatetictrolley coming soon to you.Sweet Food: another workout for yourpancreas. Bananas, beans, sticky rice, gingerand other fruits are sliced and diced and placedin a marinade of sweetened condensed milk,coconut milk liquefied sugar and egg andserved in a plastic cup with a spoon. Again,better than the description would indicate.Price: R1000. Where: on the old bridge road,down from the Canadia bank ATM and in frontof the cake shop at the main traffic circle.Noodles: a half a liter of normal saline is addedto generic dried packet noodles and thenvarious goodies are added to the mix. Some ofthese goodies are recognizable. The plasticflavouring sachets are sometimes left in thebowl at serving, possibly to provide extradietary roughage but more likely todemonstrate that you are eating a qualityproduct. This is an excellent allroundnutritious and electrolyte replacement meal.Price: R2000 to R4000 for the chock full of wtfprotein version. Where: everywhere. Look forthe stack of packet noodles on stalls orrambling trolleys.Ice Cream: despite popular travel guide bookswarning to the contrary, Kampot expats do eatlocally made ice cream from meanderingtrolleys without subsequently going to thetoilet a lot. There are at least four sellers intown but look for the man with the itinerant

bicycle powered trolley along riverside. Price:R500 to R1000Popcorn: The sweet variety familiar toWesterners and generally of high quality. Notehowever that unpopped corn is poorly sortedfrom popped and indiscriminately biting downon one of these kernels may cost you a dentalfilling. Look for gallivanting trolleys with bagsof popcorn hanging from their sides. Where:often based near the post office on riverside inthe evening but also around town. Price: R500for the small and R1000 for the large bag.Duck Embryos: strictly for the culinaryadventurous S.E. Asia traveler, or expats whohave lost the plot entirely, an unhatchedduckling is boiled in its shell and eaten with aspoon. The duckling should be sufficientlyformed so as to be el dente. Where: on the oldbridge road and on the Kep road just past theTwo Cows intersection. Price: R1500.BarBQued Squid: dried small squid arestacked and suspended from the sides ofperegrinating trolleys where they resembledecks of cards with tentacles or somethingfrom a low budget SCI FI movie. Chock full ofhigh tensile seafoody flavour, your chosen



squid are served for takeaway, lightly toastedover charcoal with a chili dipping sauce. Anexcellent spicy beef jerky is often sold from thesame trolley. Where: often based on theriverside strip but also on touring trolleysaround town. Price: R1000 to R2000 per serve.Steamed Sweet Corn: Look for the darkyellow variety as this is generally sweetwhereas the white variants only function seemsto be the alleviation of constipation byingesting a mega hit of dietary fiber. Corn issteamed and served hot with a coating of“butter” which is actually margarine, egg andsugar mix – much more palatable than theingredients suggest. BarBQued white corn isalso everywhere should your constipation prove

resistant to the steamed version. Where: oftenbased on the riverside strip but also drifting.Price: R1300 per cob but slight fluctuationsaccording to seasonal availability.Grilled Beef: small portions of sliced,seasoned beef on a bamboo skewer cookedover charcoal and served with shredded sweetand sour green papaya with a dipping jus.Where: makeshift stall near the FM buildingat the 2000 Roundabout and promenading allaround Kampot. Price: R500 per stick.Bread: generally sold as baguettes in small,large and jumbo versions. An inexpensive andfilling way to overcome your cravings forWestern food and best bought in the morningsto guarantee freshness. Where: Look for theMan With No Shirt bakery about 50 metersdown the road from Epic Arts or a further 50meters along that road and round the corner toyour left also sold in the market. Price: R500– R1000 – R1500 according to size.Sugarcane Juice: hand cranked or electricallypowered mangles are used to extract the juicefrom stalks of sugarcane and half a lime whichis then served over crushed ice veryrefreshing. Iced black tea (Number 1 Brand)with lime juice and sugar is also excellent.Where: both inside and outside of the marketor look for the stacks of sugarcane and oftenbrightly painted mangles around town. Price:R1000 per glass.Coconuts: (Cocos nucifera) al fresco,nutritious refreshment in a portable andhygienic container. Where: everywhere aroundKampot – look for the stack of green coconutsoutside shops and stalls. Price: R1500Roasted Peanuts: small, highly flavouredpeanuts (Arachis hypogaea), roasted in theshell and often sold by Cham Muslim ladieswho circumambulate around Kampot carryinglarge aluminum basins of the legume on theirheads. A larger variant is sold boiled in saltedwater in the shell. Where: Circumambulating.Price: R1000 per serve.Cut Fruit Trolley: assorted peeled and slicedfruits behind glass on a traveling trolley.Where: often based on the riverside strip butalso migratory. Price: R500 R1000 per serve.A general note: the prices quoted are the localknown base line prices at the time of writing(September 2011) and should be taken as aguide for what you should expect to pay.By Irvin S. KSG ACE Reporter.https://www.facebook.com/pages/WorldToiletDay/

19th Nov 2012



UBoat Gold HuntA Decent through brine and time.

In the course of researching his article on thereturn of the vicious Asian Sea Crocodile to theKampot River X Ace Reporter Head Teasersurvived a sneak attack by a large Belgian andhis potcroc assassins. Waterlogged andstinking of reptile sputum, Head Teaser hasresurfaced with several fresh scars to mark hisepic struggle in the fetid waters. He doeshowever sport a natty belt, slithery shoes, scalywaistcoat and a stylish shoulder bag, all madefrom the croc he claims to have dispatched incold blood with a pen knife, a half bottle ofPastis and his characteristic lack of charm.Speaking more cryptically than usual, HeadTeaser claims he’s onto something big, reallybig; bigger than a 12 meter long sea croc,bigger than his reporting Cambodia’ssuccessful bids for the 2018/2020 Olympics,even bigger than the Pulitzer winninginvestigative report on weaponized Kampotpepper corns.“I was going down on that old croc for thethird time. It was either do or die time when theold luggage dragged me down to the bottom ofthe river,” Slurring his words, he took a deepswallow of warm Pastis. “Murky doesn’t halfdescribe what it’s like down there. Being shiteblind is better than seeing what it was I had mylegs wrapped around though.”At this point Head Teaser began weepingcrocodile tears. “Sucking air from the old girl’s

overbite is something that will haunt meforever, but those few lungful’s of air gave methe strength I needed to survive.”After sobbing like a schoolgirl for severalembarrassing moments, Head Teasercontinued. “I was reaching around forsomething to finish her off with when I foundit. I couldn’t believewhat it was I held inmy slimy hand; notthere, not at thebottom of the river,not after all thoseyears.”He went on to say thatas soon as he hadwashed the shite fromhis battered torso hestarted to researchwhat he was certaincould not be.“Undercoverinvestigations intomouldering archivessometimes producemore than sneezingfits and bookworm

Possibly U169 docking at Kampot Customs pier 1944(Courtesy of Max Crow Archives)



itch,” he chortled.“I found the first clue in a paragraph In DieUnter Waterwar Wir Fast Gewonnen. (TheUnderwater War We Almost Won). A referencein an obscure German war archive about the1944 voyage of U169 caught my inattention.It was at odds with the ‘official’ record that U169 was sunk March 27, 1943 by a British B17 off the south coast of Iceland with the lossof all hands.”In the dying days of WWII the German highcommand was desperate to shore up its Asianpartner in crimes against humanity, Japan. Overthe course of the war scores of Germansubmarines were regularly dispatched to Japan,largely carrying optical equipment and ahuman cargo of engineers and designers toassist with urgent research on rocketry andatomics. In exchange the U Boats would loadup with strategic resources such as rubber,sushi and Saki to satisfy the High Command’sinsatiable lust for oriental cuisine. The finalvoyage of U169 was different, highlyclassified and little documented. The details ofU169s fate are shrouded in the mists of war

and time.X Ace Investigative Reporter Head Teaserlocated former Sauerbraten Kurt Rottengut ofthe elite Scheiße Löffelente Corp. The ancientGerman veteran of WWII, stationed in PenangMalaysia during the war remembers the U169sailing into the U Boat base built there inAugust 1943 and commanded by KK WilhelmDommes or Dominating Dom as he wasknown.“I vas in charge of de toiletten vashing detail.Mein Got in Himmel, you can imagine destench after a dri month sail from Bremen. DasBoot vas loaded wis crates marked vis da logoof da SS und Schnapps Spezielle. Vee had toschlepp dee crates to get dee mops und bucketsin. I vas thinking at de time dat der vas more tode heavy crates than extra strength schnapps.Das Kapitan said zat zee vas sailing to Tokyovonce de boyz had some fun in Penang vis degirlies, undt de Sviss bean counters signed offon de Schnapps . A veek later ze Boot sailedaway under cover of da nacht, and I vaspromoted to Unter Sauerbraten Mit Bratwurstbars vor scheiße service to da Fatherland.”Scant and heavily accented information thoughit was, it was enough to set Head Teaser on aquest for more.“I found a Royal Air Force log book referencefrom a reconnaissance flight over the Gulf ofThailand, near Kep Cambodia on April 1st,1944. It was recorded the sighting of a U Boatmatching the description of U169 perfectly.The report was dismissed as observer fatigue asU169 had almost certainly been sunk over ayear previously south of Norway.“What I found while croc wrestling set me onthe trail. I am now certain that there’s more onthe bottom of the Kampot River than humansewage and a very large, skinned and mostsincerely dead crocodile.

Standard Cambodian Units.KW or Kilowatt = Number of Watts orPagodas per province.9mm = The gap between any two items thatshould be connected.Power to weight ratio = If you have power,you don't have to wait (also applies to money).Maximum passenger load = there is alwaysspace for one more.Western Conversions.1 Khmer unit = 1.5 – 2 Western units.This works for prices, sizes, drinks, seats anddistances.



Giggling madly he went on, “I’m as giddy as aschoolgirl after her first snog. I will be able toafford to leave the KSG and get away from themadman who runs it. Hell, I might just buy thedamned rag, demote the publisher to bootlicker and cut his wages to the point he won’tbe able to afford a happy hour beer. That’llshow him.”When pressed, at the tip of a bayonet, HeadTeaser parted with a few more intriguingdetails. He babbled on about securing salvagerights, hiring blind, deaf and dumb divers andemploying an architect to design a palatialmansion he would build at the Teck Chou zoo,which he intended to buy, “For whatever itcosts. Money will be no object,” he chortled.When asked what he intended to do with theanimals currently in residence at the zoo, heanswered while licking his lips, “Eat them ofcourse.”Head Teaser, in his guise of Fat Bastard wasknown to be forever broke and only ever paidhis numerous and inflated bar tabs withcounterfeit cash. Where was the money goingto materialize from? Had he sold a kidney, or apiece of his heavily damaged liver?Bribed with a double Pastis, ice, no water,stirred not shaken, HT had to be given anotherprod with the bayonet before he was ready todivulge more of hisstory. “You know thesaying that there’s goldin them there hills, wellI’ll tell you. You have topinky swear that youwon’t print a word or tella soul. If you do I’ll skinyou and use you to linemy new crocodilewardrobe.”HT took an unhealthyslug of Pastis, glaredmenacingly for effectand blabbed on. “Wellthere’s gold in that thereriver. I know it as sure asI know my name is,umm, oh yes; just callme Fat Bastard for themoment. Pretend youdon’t know me.“After thatreconnaissance flightspotted her, U169 was

never seen again. I happen to know, with1,000% certainty that U169 actually sailed upthe river as far as…never mind where, that’smy secret, not yours.“Once I’ve paid all the appropriate ‘fees’ andhave the thumb prints I begin salvageoperations disguised as a sand dredger.”When asked how 67 year old schnapps couldpossibly be so valuable, Head Teaser roaredwith laughter.“Idiot, why do I talk to you? No, it wasn’tschnapps you sorry excuse for a cub reporter.It’s gold you fool. The Uboat was loaded withNazi Gold. The final mission of U169 was tobring 45 tons of gold to Japan to pay Berlin’slong overdue account for rubber, sushi, Sakiand Japan’s bought and nearly paid forparticipation in the quest for globaldominance.”The man was obviously mad, but the bayonetwas within easy reach.“Buried in my garden in a mayonnaise jar, Ihave proof that U169 is at the bottom of theriver, and I know exactly where. You think memad, but what you don’t know is that I foundthe final piece of the puzzle in Berlin.“I started with the April 1st, 1944 sighting nearKep and worked backwards through recentlyreleased archives of handwritten receipts



signed off by high ranking Nazi officials.Finally after countless days of searching, thereit was, signed by Hitler himself. It is an orderassigning 45 tons of ‘gold, 24K, Jewishdonations’ to submarine command for loadingof same onto U169 in Bremen for immediatetransport to Japan. In faded red ink someonehad stamped Streng Geheime Top Secret.”HT took another long swallow on his Pastisand fixed the sorry excuse for a cub reporterwith a rheumy though steady eye. “So are youin?”When asked to explain HT laughed and said heneeded investment capital to pay appropriatecommissions, secure silent men and hireequipment. For a low buy in price of $10,000in small unmarked bills, he promised a .025%share if and when the gold was recovered.After this story was written and filed the sorryexcuse for a cub reporter calculated thepotential take and withdrew his life’s savings incash. Witnesses claim that when the KSGreporter asked for a receipt, X Ace ReporterHead Teaser hit him over the head with a Pastisbottle and was last seen running in thedirection of the governor’s mansion. Sorryexcuse has been demoted to no excuse andsuspended with pay. The current whereaboutsof Head Teaser is not known. Reports havecome in that he has all the paperwork sortedand will be rich, rich, rich soon. A brand newVietnamese sand dredger is rumored to bemoving up the coast.KSG reporters will be following this story withthe usual lack of enthusiasm. Everyone wantsto know. Is there really gold in the KampotRiver?By Alan HT KSG XXX ACE Reporter

Ask LuckyAnswering your questions about livingin Kampot

Two issues of the KSG ago, Lucky presentedtwelve Totally Awesome Business Concepts forpeople wanting to set up a commercialenterprise in Kampot. Lucky would like tothank the two people who contacted him andwho were overwhelmingly positive about hisarticle and – as always – your cheque is in themail. As for the other eight hundred andseventy three people who threatened Luckywith physical violence in response to his article– you can get stuffed – Lucky is not gettingpaid to write this. With that, Lucky presentsfive more Amazingly Awesome Niche MarketBusiness Concepts.Prestige Car DealerOh Lord wont you buy me a Murcledes Benz!You don't need a degree in sociology to realizethat there is an emerging middle class and aslew of cashedup Westerners in Kampot withthe disposable readies for a status car. Haveyou got a sweet deal for them. Import Made InChina knockoff prestige cars including Luxus, Ronge Raver, Murcledes, Fellati, OstenPlaten, Vulvo, Blentley, Masterbati andJugular – If Its Not Leaking Its Empty orExsanguinated. All are assembled in therenowned Glorious Peoples Turtle CanningFactory and come with an unbeatable 5 min or50 meter warranty – whichever comes first.Don't forget to sweeten the deal by throwing ina free pair of Liver of Strauss Jeans A Legendsince 2011 and a bottle of Johnny WankerBlack Label – Not a Drop is Sold til its TwoDays Old. (Please Note: The Extended – socalled Long March Running Dog Warranty on



the above vehicles – that, for a small annualstipend engaged a Chinese mechanic to jogbehind the vehicle whenever it was in motion –reeks of bourgeois exploitation and is no longerbeing offered).Last Resort BarThis one is liquid gold!. You might think thatexpat bars have been done to death andopening a new one in Kampot would be aboutas profitable as selling photos of the Pope inMecca. This is of course complete rubbish asthe most lucrative niche market has beencompletely overlooked by everyone exceptyou. Open a bar that only accepts customersthat have been banned from other bars!Many expats or long term visitors to Kampotcan easily get through five cases of beer, twobottles of Scotch, a bottle of Pastis and somemethylated spirits with milk – and this is just abreakfast aperitif before they start seriousdrinking! Unbelievably, Kampot bar ownersthrow money away by progressively banningthese juicy, high cashflow customers for suchtrivial things as swearing, fighting, falling overa lot, blacking out in the toilet, loudlyreminiscing about the good old days in Pattaya,

smashing the furniture, removing their clothes,projectile vomiting, challenging God to gamesof pool, self injuring, being incontinent of urineand publicly defecating on the floor. Where arethey going to drink when they have beenbanned from everywhere else? Your place! Geta mop and bucket, some industrial strengthdisinfectant, a baseball bat, some hired goonsand get ready for a big night – you are finallyliving the dream!Pop Song LyricistGotta get those good vibrations! Pop music isbig business in Kampot as step into any coffeeshop and you can't help but note that there atleast eighteen TV's running simultaneously atmax volume with each TV showing a differentbittersweet Karaoke pop song – and the localsare lapping it up! This is a gravy train justwhistling for you to get on board!Think you don't know how to write a local popsong? Don't sweat it! They are all based onShakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and have thefollowing theme:Poor boy meets rich girl but girl's familyforbids her to marry him because he doesn'thave money or a Murcledes, doesn't likeDurians and most damningly is from Kep.Boy cries, attempts suicide with Paracetemoland the red and green tablets and subsequentlyrequires brain transplant. Girl cries, calls boyon her iPhone and offers him her brain. Boycries, declines offer and attempts to buyreplacement brain in Kampot market or oneBay. Girl cries and secretly cuts her brain outto give to boy but family finds out and rushgirl, brain and iPhone to hospital but it is toolate and girl dies. Family cries. Onlookers cry.Complete strangers and dogs in street cry. Fiftythousand friends on Facebook cry and postphotos of their tearful faces. Tearful surgeonand nurse who secretly loved boy transplant

Advertising SpaceKampot Survival Guide

We print about 3000 copiesevery three months.Next deadline 20th November.More details on page 27



brain into boy. Girl's family realize they havemade Big Mistake, beg for forgiveness andadopt boy, several of the onlookers, the nurseand dogs. They all drive to Kep in their RongeRaver, eating Durians and watched over byghost of girl who is now smiling.Cosmetics ManufacturerI see some white skin and I want it paintedblack.Walk into any pharmacy or general store inKampot and you will note that the shelves areawash with unguents, lotions and potions toturn skin a whiter shade of pale but not asingle tanning or browning agent! This isbusiness oversight of epic proportions and youdon't need to be the CEO of Revlon to knowthat the women of Cambodia are screaming outfor you to manufacturer products to darkentheir skin. A sure fire, hip brand name is DirtyGirl Body Browning Cream with the sexy tagline – Low Caste and Lovin' It. Be sure to bringsome Western finesse to your choice of productlogo – possibly a pushbike, a walnut or a crowstanding in a tree struck by lightning.Kampot Fusion MilkshakesWelcome to Kampot, the land of Milk andMoney! Drive your Masterbati around Kampotand you don't need to be Ray Kroc to noticethat there isn't a single fast food outlet makingmilkshakes that fuse the best the West andCambodia have to offer tastewise.Suggested milkshake recipes include:Vanilla Bubble Gum with Mars Bars, Squid,Spiders and Ditch WeedStrawberry Cheese Cake with CaramelCustard, Small Dead Fish and IntestinesChocolate Toffee Pecan Butter, Rum N Raisinwith Chicken Feet, Snails and WTF ©Banana Peach Whipped Cream Marshmallows

with Eels and Unhatched DucksBest of all, there is a cheap and plentiful supplyof fresh UHT milk available from right nextdoor in Vietnam. To those that say that I did notwatch their buddies die face down in the muckso that people could drink milkshakes fromcommie cows, Lucky says it is time to moveon. Your suggested business slogan CommieCows Are Winners and your suggestedbusiness name – The Cow In Black Pajamas© Ask Lucky August 2012



Learn some useful KhmerAn introduction to the language.

Knowing a few phrases in Khmer always earnssmiles and nods of approval from locals aswell as crusty expatriates who are fluent in theCambodian language. Unlike Thai orVietnamese, Khmer is not a tonal language andis therefore not difficult to master. As a basicguide, Khmer has 87 vowels – 43 of which arepronounced as the letter a (a=apple) and 39pronounced as the letter e (e=egg). Theremaining 5 vowels have no equivalent soundin any of the IndoEuropean languages and areeither silent, useless or can be safely ignored.There are only 2 consonants, the letter p(p=pastrami) and the letter z which can bepronounced as either zed (female) or zee(male) according to the gender of the personspeaking or being spoken to. Grammaticalstructure is simplicity itself with sentencesfollowing the format verbverbverbadverbverb (e.g. go, go, go quickly go) exceptwhere the past tense is indicated. In this casethe structure is reversed or the consonant zedis added to the end of the sentence where thespeaker is female or transsexual or at leastcommitted to a sex change operation. Thefuture tense is universally indicated by theinclusion (and therefore the absence) of asilent vowel at the beginning of the sentence.Correct pronunciation of the 82 audible a and evowel sounds can present a challenge as whilethere are no tonal inflections, subtle changes inmeaning are conveyed by the volume withwhich the letter is said, the age and status ofthe person speaking, the ambient temperatureand the proximity to a Buddhist festival..Generally, the safest practice for a novice is tosay all a and e sounds as loudly as possible,bow or genuflect repeatedly while speakingand trust that meaning is construedcontextually. We at the KSG have put togethersome of the more commonly used Englishphrases with a Latinized phonetic Khmer (andtherefore more vowels and consonants)translation to help get you started.Khmer: Nis thlay Australie cab plonkHeathcliffe awt tay nuanceEnglish: This Australian CabernetSauvignonwine is dark and brooding but lacks subtlety.

Khmer: Anglais yeay gullible yeay K’maisamesameEnglish: The English word “gullible” is theonly word spelled and pronounced the same inthe Khmer language.Khmer: Khnum DaewooTico cheeh awt tayLiberace bling blingEnglish: My Daewoo Tico lacks performance,style and street creditability.Khmer: Khnum jang baan Hummer tomprahok sa art arnie term in atorEnglish: I want a Hum Vee vehicle so I can bea big cheese like the lovely ArnoldSchwarzeneggerKhmer: Nis thlay trad k’mai nuptial MilliVanilli tomtom bose ear Ow! Ow! AngkorEnglish: This is a traditional Khmer weddingusing fake 200,000W Bose speakers that havebeen in my family since Angkorian timesKhmer: Nis thlay trad krama ot sa’art samesame Ernest Borgnine. Puoomann Christiand’Or?English: This is bad krama. Wearing it makesme look like the actor Ernest Borgnine. Howmuch for one made by Christian d’Or?Khmer: Srey? Lady Gaga katoey massaanxiety khnum c dos runEnglish: The artist Lady Gaga is ofquestionable gender and I must respectfullydecline a massage from him/herKhmer: Loi klie samesame Imelda Marcos.Loi tictic khnum WMD pa’sar Imelda Marcoshumpy.English: These shoes are too expensive. Giveme a discount or I will unleash Weapons ofMass Destruction on your shoe stall.

By Irvin S. KSG ACE Reporter.

Found something not listed, tell us here.



Projects & Voluntary Work...There are many ways you can spend your time doinggood in Kampot, listed below are a few NGO's andprojects that could do with your help, either bydonating or volunteering.Teuk Chhou Zoo. UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT.Gone are the days of illtreatment & emaciatedanimals. Big plans & a bright future are afoot Cambodia's first wildlife education park. Check outteukchhou.com. Come for a visit, ask for Monique,she'll be happy to tell you more or even book you upfor their "Keeper for a Day" program.Project Cambodia was established by the BuddhistLibrary and Australian dentist Dr Cecilia So, itprovides dental aid as a humanitarian programmewhich delivers basic dental services to the childrenwho live in Cambodia’s 4th largest city, Kampot.Further info here,http://www.buddhistlibrary.org.au/projectcambodia/dentalaidproject3Epic Arts Café. The place to be if you have a sweettooth or have a liking for good coffee, run by and forthe disabled, it helps! So get down there. They alsohave a new performance centre and workshops nearthe friendship monument, (the one with the guns)check the cafe for further details.Kampot Traditional Music School. Pop in andcheck them out, Khmer music and dance is not allkaraoke based and some is really good, so is the danceso check them up and book yourself a performance.Sisters II / Heritage Orphanage. Cafe fare andinternet in one building, breakfasts, cakes andsandwiches to feast on whilst doing your email. Thecafe funds a small orphanage near to the Olympicstadium, so drop by and help support the kids.Kep Gardens Association is a nonprofit,independent project established by Australians toprovide education and training in English, hospitality,mechanical and civil engineering, computing andfarming skills as well as sponsor ongoing highereducation through our Educational Scholarship Fundfor the Khmer people of Kep. Australians andCambodians working together.Prek Thnout Community. Save Cambodia'sWildlife started this project back in 2007, it is nowrunning nicely and offers village homestay visits andday trips. Also trekking to local falls, rattan furnitureproduction and boat trips to see dolphins. It's 30kmtowards Snook but it's best to check with SCW firston 088 902 2099.Chumkriel Language School (CLS) is a Cambodianoperation striving to provide accessible education andassistance to the local community. CLS requests aminimum placement of one week and requires allvolunteers to be aged 18 years and [email protected] you know of any other NGO's or projects thatdeserve a mention, please do let us know, we reallywant to expand this section.

Things you didn't know about Kampot.1. Kampot led the Cambodian space raceduring the 1950's and 60's as Bokor Hill wasused for test launchings of their experimental“Wooung Gao Soo Gomlung” rockets.2. Kampot changed its name shortly afterKep was named, it was renamed specificallyto avoid any confusion with Kep, the name isderived from two words “Kamp” and “Not”.3. Bokor Hill used to be a proper mountainwith a pointy top, but the French stole it.4. In 1967 Kampot FC toured Europe on anextensive and unbeaten tour.5. Kampot was originally built around asystem of canals akin to Venice, sadly due toneglect these waterways have silted and dried,only to be seen during exceptionally heavyrains.6. Bokor Hill is still an active volcano,difficult to see during the wet season but allthrought the dry times you will see smokerising from all round the hill.7. Kampot City is larger than the City ofLondon, in both size and population.



Transport...We at the KSG apologise for our lack ofdetailed travel info, there is a reason for this,it's because this is a guide for Kampot, it'spurpose is to give you ideas to stay, so we'rebuggered if we're going to help you get away!Tuk Tuk. The first choice of transport thesedays, most of Kampot and the surrounding areacan be accessed by Tuk Tuk in all weathers,popular trips are down to Kep, mangroves,pepper plantation and caves, or up to therapids, zoo and beach.Moto. These guys can make your stay good,using their translation skills you will exploremore. Find them all around town but the bestspeaking ones hang between the traffic circleand the bus stop.Moto Rental. Either your guesthouse can sortit out or you can pop on down to the shops andpick your own, make sure you are happy withit and check it has lights if you plan to ride atnight. Wherever you go be careful, especiallyof the cows.Bicycle Rental. Some guesthouses offer rentalof bikes, mainly basic bone shakers so don't gettoo excited, although some tour companieshave mountain bike rental too, so use the shittybike to find a nice one.Bus/Taxi. The easiest way to sort this isthrough your guesthouse, they earn a smallamount of commission for this that covers theirtelephone costs etc, if you are a really tight gityou could go down the bus stop and haggle.Night Busses. We do not reccommend them,you won't get the sleep you think you will andtherefore will miss a day you could haveenjoyed, they are also quite dangerous.

Some Useful Numbers...ABC. 0972560585Bar Red GH. 077997096Bart the Boatman. 092174280Blissful GH. 012848390Bluestar Real Estate. 012611317Bodhi Villa GH. 012728884Bokor Mt Lodge. 033932314Borey Bokor I GH. 092978168Bungalow Kampot River. 011523627Cafe Expresso. 092388736Diamond Hotel 0336300800Epic Arts Cafe. 092922069Farm Link. 0333902354Ganesha GH. 092724612Green House. 0888863071Indochine. 092762933Kampot GH. 012512931Kampot Pie & Ice Cream Palace. 099657826Kampot Riverside Hotel. 012351764Kampot River View GH. 012821570Kampot Survival Guide. 092724720Kep Gardens Ass. 015653317Kepler's Books. 012306410Lee & Pop's. 016592735Le Soleil d'Or. 086295894Little Garden Bar GH. 012427572Long Villa GH. 092251418Magic Sponge. 017946428Mea Culpa GH. 012504769Oh Neil's. 015207790Olly's Place. 092605837Orchid GH. 092226996Paris GH. 033932330Pepper GH. 017822626Pizza 36. 0972204169Rikitikitavi GH. 012235102Salt + Pepper. 099219004Say Sabok. 012927897Srey Mom Cafe. 012987457Ta. Eng GH. 012330058Tiny Kampot Pillows. 0977666094Tuk tuk, Chak kan. 012456935Utopia GH. 0977560164Villa Vidici GH. 089290714



ABC. French run bar in the place of the old Honey bar.Aiming for the musically minded with events and jamnights every Saturday, offering unique cocktails, Frenchstyle snacks till 9pm and standard bar wares.BarRed. Under new management, English run latenight bar and guest rooms just off the front. Cambodiadraught beer at all day happy hour prices + all usual barwares, late night sports TV, free WIFI. Rooms have fan,TV, ensuite, English and Khmer spoken.Blissful Guest House. French/Brit run bar restaurantand guest house in the heart of town, nice gardens andchill areas, draught beer and wide selection of food,some cooked in a wood fired oven. Rooms $5 – 10,dorm $2, fan, en suite, garden, WIFI, English andKhmer spoken.Bodhi Villa. Aus run bar restaurant and guest house onthe west bank, riverside seating, pontoon, pool table,chill out atmosphere with late night opening. Rooms,bungalows and floating rooms $4 – 8, fan, river view,water sports, English and Khmer spoken.Bokor Mountain Lodge. Kiwi run bar restaurant andhotel on the front, classical colonial architecture with alarge river frontage, great sunset views, internationalmenu and well stocked bar. Rooms $35 45+, AC, HW,fan, TV, en suite, river view, WIFI, English & Khmerspoken.Bungalow Kampot River. New Khmer run barrestaurant and guest house on the west bank of the river,riverside bungalows $6, fan, river view, WIFI, Englishand Khmer spoken.Cafe Espresso. Australian style breakfast cafe.Specialty coffee, roasted on site, ground fresh, bakedgoods, home made condiments, good vegetarian options& daily lunch specials. Just around the corner from epicarts cafe. open 8am till late afternoon free wifi.Cozy Elephant Guest House. French/Khmer run guesthouse near the taxi stand. Rooms $4 12, dorm $2.50,AC, HW, fan, en suite, WIFI, free bicycle rental,English, French and Khmer spoken.Diamond Hotel. Bar, Restaurant and hotel just off thenew bridge road, rooms $2040, TV, AC, HW, en suite,English and Khmer spoken.Epic Arts Cafe. Open from 7am till 6pm offeringbreakfasts, lunches, coffee and cakes. Run by and forpeople with disabilities, they also have a performancearts centre, pop in to learn more.Ganesha Riverside Eco Resort. German/Khmer runbar, restaurant and accommodation on a lost loop of theriver, boat trips and activities on site. Rooms $6 45,English, German and Khmer spoken.Green House. Donkey/French run bar, restaurant andguest house up the river. Riverside bungalows with greatviews of sun rise/set. Bungalows $1020, fan etc,hammocks $3, bamboo rafts and soon to have Kayak forrent, English, Khmer and French spoken.Hour Kheang Guest House. New Khmer run bar,restaurant and guest house opposite the old market.Rooms $7 20, AC, HW, Fan, TV, WIFI, en suite,English, Chinese and Khmer spoken.Indochine. Western run bar restaurant within a stonesthrow from the front, slow cooked western & asianfood, great music, WIFI, Bobs your Uncle andDonkey's me mate. Khmer and English spoken.Jam Tic. Set on the slopes of Phnom Ker wirh stunning

views of Kep and Bokor, rooms $3, AC, HW, Spa, ensuite, swimming pool, free moto & boat rental, bar &restaurant, English, French, Greek and Khmer spokenbut not understood.Kampocchino. Under new management, Aus run coffeelounge and bar. Coffee snacks and general bar fodder ina comfortable setting, draught Cambodia beer, sportsTV, English and Khmer spoken.Kampot Guest House. Rooms $5 – 20, AC, HW, TV,fan, en suite, garden, bike rental, bar & restaurant, WIFI,English and Khmer spoken.Kampot Pie and Ice Cream Palace GH. NewCanadian/Khmer run restaurant and guest house just offthe northern front. Offering all manner of sweet thingsand some hearty snacks. Rooms $6 $25, AC, HW, TV,en suite, WIFI, English and Khmer spoken.Kampot Riverside Hotel. New Aus Khmer run hoteland cocktail lounge on the northern front. AC, HW, TV,WIFI, fridge, tea/coffee facilities, en suite. Rooms $20 45, English and Khmer spoken.Le Soleil d'Or. New French run bar, restaurant andguest house just off the front. Stylish decor with wellappointed rooms, AC, HW, ensuite, TV, fan, rooms $35 55 inc breakfast, French and English spoken.Long Villa Guest House. Rooms $6 – 13, AC, HW, TV,fan, en suite, bar & restaurant with varied menu, WIFI,English and Khmer spoken.Little Garden Bar. Rooms $10 – 20, AC, HW, TV, fan,en suite, garden, bar & restaurant, WIFI, English andKhmer spoken.Madi's House. Khmer run bar restaurant on the front,pool table, cocktails and a full menu with excellent

Bars, Restaurants and Rooms.

Whats gone or moved.Akashi Cafe GoneAlaska Super Club GoneBamboo Light Cafe GoneBlank Canvas Became Olly's placeBlue Dragon Became Rusty KeyholeBlue Mountain Became Rheaj's BurgerBonkors Became Blue Ray and thats GoneBokor M't Club Became Marco PoloBokor View Hotel GoneCoco House Became Rusty Keyhole 2Comfortably Numb Became BarRedGreen man Closed at presentHoney Bar Became ABCIke Bar GoneJasmine Became FrangipaniKampot Interact Became K'Pot SouvenirsKiri Guesthouse GoneLe Niam Bay GoneLucci Food GoneMarco Polo became Bokor M't LodgeMearly Chender GoneMoon's Guesthouse GonePiggies Became KampocchinoRheaj's Burger Became WunderbarSalt n Pepper Wholesale onlySouthern Cross Motel GoneSundowner Tavern Became Salt + PepperWhats Hot in Kampot Gone



sunset views. hosting live music events, open late.Magic Sponge. Western run guesthouse, restaurant,sports bar with 50" HDTV, beer garden, minigolf, pooltable, DVD lounge, WiFi. Large menu, big portions.Rooms $8$20, A/C or fan, H/W. Penthouse dorm $3with mozzie net, fan, LED lamp, lockbox, sundeck,lounge, English and Khmer spoken.Mea Culpa. Irish run bar restaurant and guest housebehind the Governors residence, wood fired pizza ovenand nice bar in a large secluded garden. Rooms $20 25,AC, HW, TV, DVD, WIFI, en suite, garden, bar &restaurant, parking, English and Khmer spoken.Natural Restaurant and Guest House. Khmer run barrestaurant and guest house on the river just north of thenew bridge. Over the river eating and Khmer stylestilted chalets. Rooms $15+, AC, HW, TV,Oh Neil's. Irish run late night bar next to Bokor MtLodge. Standard bar fare and tunes in a hole betweenthe walls setting. Irish themed and manned with foodavailable, English and Khmer spoken.Olly's Place. Belgian Bar, Restaurant and guesthouse onthe river, rooms and bungalows $810, fan, nets etc.Wind surfing and lessons, paddle boards for rent.English, Dutch, French, Thai and Portuguese spokenOrchid Guest House. Rooms and bungalows $5 – 15,AC, HW, TV, fan, en suite, garden, bike rental, tours,boat trips, bar & restaurant, English & Khmer spoken.Paris Guest House. Khmer run guest house one roadback from the front. Rooms $5 – 15, AC, HW, TV, fan,en suite, English and Khmer spoken.Pepper Guest House. Rooms $5 15, AC, HW, TV,fan, ensuite, soon to have a bar and restaurant, garden,parking, English, French and Khmer spoken.Pizza 36. Brit/Khmer run bar and restaurant just off thefront. Fresh US style pizza and pasta delivered free fromthe Kampot Playboys, the Pot's favotite band.Rikitikitavi. British/Dutch run rooftop bar restaurantand guesthouse on the front, high end eating and a goodselection cocktails and malt's. Rooms $30 – 35 incbreakfast, AC, HW, TV, DVD, en suite, bar &restaurant, English, Dutch and Khmer spoken.Rusty Keyhole. Brit/Khmer run bar restaurant on thefront, sports tv, BBQ western and Khmer food, Englishand Khmer spoken.Say Sa Bok. French/Khmer run bar restaurant on thefront, early happy hours, full Khmer and western menuand great Khmer coffee.Sisters II. Cafe fare and internet in one building,breakfasts, cakes and sandwiches. The cafe funds asmall orphanage near to the Olympic stadium, so dropby and help support the Heritage Orphanage kids.Srey Mom Cafe. Khmer run cafe opposite the 2000monument. Daytimes, Khmer food at local prices.By order it's still possible to get Srey Mom's famousIndian and western foods, curries, pies, pizzas, burgersand more, if your negotiation skills are up to it that is.Open from 5am daily till 6pm.Tiny Kampot Pillows Shop. Hand made pillows,cushions, pillowcases and covers as individual gifts orin commercial quantities. Wide range of fabrics tochoose from. Small orders usually completed within 24hours. Also selling krama items, photos, postcards etcall made in Kampot. Shop at the 2000 Roundabout.

Utopia. German/Khmer run bar restaurant and guesthouse up the river, just before Tek Chheu and the Zoo(8km ish), stunning views along river in a total get awayfrom it all setting, great spot to stop on a river cruise orjust an amazing getaway place. Rooms & Bungalows $6– 25, fan, en suite, river view, swimming, English andKhmer spoken.Villa Vedici. Dutch run bar, restaurant and guest house2km up the river. Bungalows $25, fan, TV, DVD, fridge,WIFI, swimming pool, boat trips, water sports, kitesurfing, river view, en suite, garden, Dutch, English andKhmer spoken.NOTE. Listings were correct once, they are notcontractually binding so do not rely on them. Facilitieslisted do not apply to all rooms, i.e. you won't find anAC room for $4. All places should be able to booktickets and tours and offer some travel advice.

Kampot Survival GuideCreation...This guide was written by real Kampot residents,people who live in and love Kampot. It was createdusing Linux Mint Debian, ScribusNG, Libre Office,Inkscape and The Gimp. All these applications areOpen Source and are freely available on the internet.The Team...Steve J Director, layout, basic guide, maps n sales.Irvin S Director, wordsmith, food guide, agony aunt.Alan HT Undercover X Ace Reporter, non factualconsultant, poster model and present Potpat at last.Uncle Fran Financial Probability Consultant,Official Distorian, Pig farmer and Ace Reporter.Obtaining Copies...New Issues are released every three months, copiesare delivered to advertising businesses in Kampot,they are also sent to PP, Snook and Kep.All of the past issues are available for download onour blog site in pdf, epub, and mobi formats.http://kampotsurvivalguide.blogspot.comAdvertising...Contact Steve on 092724720 or the email addressbelow. The next issue due is in December and thedeadline 20th November. Advert sizes are, Banner138mm W 48mm H, Quarter 69mm W 97mm H, Half138mm W 97mm H, artwork should be submitted infull colour in either .jpg .eps .png .pdf or .tiff fileformat, it should be of the highest possible quality.Sorry we cannot accept .doc or .docx files, ever!!!Thanks to...Many thanks go out to the sponsors and submitterswho make this rag possible, not forgeting my manyeditors who make it possible for me to be understood.Contact us...Submissions, corrections, classifieds, advertisingrequests and threats should be directed to thepublisher, if you can find him or emailed [email protected] you could be gay about it and post on the LonelyPlanet forums (thorntree), like oldted did.

Bars, Restaurants and Rooms.

This is not a map, it's not even close to being a map, but it should get you there.

Documents

Kampot Survival Guide Issue 24