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Lessons Learned from a
27 Year Recovery WalkMichele Alexander Bibby
Who Am I
• 51 year LWBIA
• 27 years managing my Bipolar Disorder
• Married for 27 years, recently widowed
• Parent of 2 children
• 5 years of experience parenting a child with a mental health diagnosis
• I am the EVIDENCE
My Story
• About Me
• Only child
• College graduate
• Mom, 2 kids
• Diagnosed while in Law School
• Medication Compliant for many years
• 20 plus year successful career in Human Resources
• Pregnancy, age 40 … hormonal shift
More About Me
• Change in medication
• Four years of seasonal cycling, • 4 summers of crisis hospitalizations• 2 inpatient commitments
• Inability to work
• Acceptance of the illness
More about me
• Education about bipolar disorder
• Re-claiming my life
• Giving back• Volunteering, DBSA support groups
• Telling my story for the 1st time 2007
• Trained as a certified peer specialist
More About Me
• Worked part-time as CPS at Austin State Hospital (previous patient)
• Worked full-time as a consultant with Via Hope
• Worked myself off disability
• Grief of recent loss
• Supporting children through their loss
Recovery
• I believe recovery is a process, not a destination. My recovery journey has spanned 27 years
• SAMHSA working definition of recovery. A process of change through which individuals improve their health and wellness, live a self- directed life, and strive to reach their full potential.
Childhood Experiences Matter
• Childhood trauma leaves scars
• Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study – CDC and Kaiser Permanente, www.acestudy.org
• ACE study says the more adverse experiences in childhood, the greater likelihood for struggling in adulthood
• Childhood experiences can be a critical starting point of reference for counseling therapy
Sick children ….. Sick
families• Emotionally distressed children are the
outcome of sick family systems
• In my case, after my diagnosis I began a journey of 27 years of counseling therapy
• No one in my family participated in or received any type of therapy
• I believe if you give counseling to a child from a distressed family and the child begins to improve, the benefits are diminished when they are returned to a sick family dynamic
When The Illness Shows Up Matters
• In my case, I was in Law School
• The later the onset of the illness, the more a person is likely to have accomplished
• We must acknowledge the difficulty children and adolescents have when they are diagnosed so early
• Childhood and adolescent diagnoses can impair the potential a person’s life may hold
Dreams Deferred
• As MH Consumers we have life goals and we have dreams
• Does the dreaded “D” – diagnosis mean the death of our dreams?
Impact of Race on Diagnosis
• The vestiges of slavery have left a legacy of anger in our community
• Anger should not result in a diagnosis
• Being black male should not increase the likelihood for special education or diagnoses
• We have to be very discerning about the labels put on us, on members of our community and our children
MH Service Trauma
• MH consumer diagnosed in the 1980’s, I experienced• Straight Jackets• Rubber Isolation Rooms• Mistreatment when you are the most
vulnerable
• There is a problem in our society when a person has to recover from the “therapeutic” services they received
Fear, Blame and Shame
• In my family, no one wanted to acknowledge any presence of mental illness in the family. There appeared to be a lot of fear related to my diagnosis
• Different sides of the family were blamed
• No one wanted to talk about the illness, consequently I felt a lot of shame
• We have to open up the dialogue in our families to normalize the conversations about the presence of mental health issues in our families
Language Matters
• Crazy
• Odd
• Troubled
• Mental Health Consumer
• Distressed
Medication Compliance
• I was blessed in that the first med I was prescribed was the right med
• I learned early on that the medication management was key to managing my symptoms
• Many consumers are not so fortunate and spend years trying to find the right cocktail
• Years of productivity can be lost spent adjusting and changing meds
• This is compounded for children and adolescents with constantly changing brains
Disability
• In 2002, I had a baby and had to change a med I had been taking for 20 years
• I began seasonal cycling
• I had 4 summers in crisis. Four hospitalizations
• I had to reorder my life
• Disability was a life saving option
Acceptance
• Once on disability, I came to terms with my illness
• I accepted that I had an illness that had to be managed and could become unmanageable
• Being on disability afforded me the poor treatment many MH consumers experience everyday
Self Awareness
• During a hospitalization at ASH, I was exposed to Mary Ellen Copelands Wellness Recovery Action Program (WRAP)
• WRAP allowed me insight that has become critical in managing my illness. I now know how to gage• Early warning signs• Signs that things are breaking down• What are my triggers• Who are my supporters
Support System
• As a MH consumer, having a circle of caring, loving people is key
• A loving support system ensures you are not isolated
• Having a supportive and loving family has been one of my success strategies
Relationships Matter
• We are meant to be in relationship one to another
• My greatest desire is to be engaged in healthy relationships with positive people
• Sometimes we do and say things in crisis that can strain or damage relationships
• I believe just as we can work on our recovery, we can work to recover relationships when they are worthwhile
Peer Support
• There is nothing like the mutuality of a relationship between people with lived experience
• DBSA tag line, “We’ve been there, we can help”
• I became a certified peer specialist. This is a career opportunity for MH consumers
• The authenticity of relating and sharing that PS provide in clinical settings is incomparable
Wonderfully Made
• People living with mental illness are extra sensitive and I believe a little extra human
• We are especially sensitive to light, season, hurt and pain (our own and others)
• We can relate
• Perhaps MH consumers are “extra” human
• There is a lot of pain and darkness in this world
• MH consumers are uniquely equipped to detect and support the distress of others
Shift of FocusIllness to Wellness
• What you focus on you give power to
• I began to focus on the things I do to stay well
• These are my wellness strategies• Meds• Heart Healthy Diet• Exercise • Healthy Relationships• Spirituality• Under committing• African American Therapist• Wicked smart Psychiatrist• Integration of physical and mental health care
Giving Back
• I learned that Giving Back is also a key wellness strategy for me
• I learned to be a support group facilitator with DBSA. I became DBSA chapter President
• It has been said to those whom much is given, much is required. So, I have moved my efforts to advocacy
• MLK said “Injustice Anywhere is a Threat to Justice Everywhere”
• There is still a lot of injustice that plays itself out with MH consumers on many different system levels
Adaptability
Priorities Change
• Career
• Family
• Managing the Illness
• Maintaining Wellness
• Me
• Advocacy
Resilience is Key
Face of Resilience
Face of Resilience
Face of Resilience
Re-Invent Yourself
Failure Is a Part of Growth
• Failure can actually put you on the path to the next great chapter in your life
• Recovery is non-linear. The non-linearity of it includes dead ends and detours
• The key is staying on the path
Life Throws Curve Balls
• Emotional Distress
• Situational Distress• Catastrophic Events• Death/Loss• Chronic Illness
• Key is overcoming
Fully Recovered
• Decision Making
• Major Social Supports
• Social Role / Identity
• Role of Medication
• Emotional Intelligence
• Global Assessment of Functioning (GAF)
• Sense of Self
My Responsibility
• My words, actions
• Be a loving parent
• Maintaining my own wellness
• Continuing education about mental health matters
• Supporting & inspiring my peers. Informing folks about mental health issues from a consumer perspective
Resources• Books
• Visible Darkness, William Styron• Unquiet Mind, Kay Redfield Jemison• Brilliant Madness, Patti Duke
• Via Hope, www.viahope.org. Certified Peer Specialist training and certification
• Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP), Mary Ellen Copeland, www.mentalhealthrecovery.com
• Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE Study)
• FacingUs, www.facingus.org - Wellness Tracker
• Depression Bipolar Support Alliance, DBSA. www.dbsalliance.org - Support Groups and other resources
• SAMHSA Working Definition of Recovery. http://store.samhsa.gov/product/SAMHSA-s-Working-Definition-of-Recovery/PEP12-RECDEF
• National Empowerment Center, ECPR Training, www.power2u.org
Summary