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Select the “Expository/Informative” link

Open your Rough Draft in WORD

Highlight and COPY the entire document.

PASTE the document into the Holt Scoring window and click the “Get Your Score” button.

I NEED TO SEE AND RECORD

YOUR SCORE!!!

SHOW ME THE

FEEDBACK!!!

Copy and Paste this feedback to the bottom of your ROUGH DRAFT

Your ScoreBased on a 6 Point Rubric

Feedback based on the Six Traits

of Writing

This is your OVERALL score

Click the “Analytic Feedback” buttonThis provides DETAILED information

Copy and Paste ALL FIVE

SECTIONS of the Analytic

Feedback onto the bottom of your ROUGH

DRAFT.

Read the bulleted lists under each

section.Focus on your weakest areas

for the best chance of

raising your score.

Holt Scoring Scale – Rubric and Grade Conversions

• ADVANCED = 6 Points (95%)

• PROFICIENT = 5 Points (85%)

• COMPETENT = 4 Points (75%)______________________________________

• LIMITED = 3 Points (65%)

• BASIC = 2 Points (55%)

• EMERGING = 1 Points (45%)_____________________________________

• UNSCORABLE = 0 Points (0%)

• Make sure you have ALL feedback on the bottom of your essay!!!

• SAVE your essay with the FEEDBACK attached.

• PRINT a copy of your ROUGH DRAFT with the feedback attached to use in class over the next few weeks.

• Read the feedback carefully and use your notes on the SIX TRAITS of WRITING to begin improving your ROUGH DRAFT.

• EDIT and REVISE your rough draft using a colored pen to show your work.*You will receive a grade for how much editing and revision is shown

Click the “Model Essay” buttonto view a well-written essay

The Model EssayExpository/Informative Writing

We will examine and analyze a well-written essay that meets the

requirements of the rubric.

The Model Essay:Champs, Survivors, and Ordinary People

In order to survive in this world, people sometimes go to great lengths. Within them they carry a spirit that inspires the will to go on. A girls'soccer team battles its way to the top; a disaster-movie heroine finds thestrength to save herself; a struggling couple discover in their love the spiritto go on. All, no matter what, have an instinct or a survival attitude thatpushes them to become winners—to overcome the odds they confront.

Introduction

Direct opener,with three examples to

anticipate the bodyparagraphs

Thesis statement

The will to survive affects even ordinary activities such as high schoolsports competitions. The girls soccer team at Central High School, forexample, learned a lot about survival last year. These girls started out theseason, wanting to achieve great things. We all knew that they had thetalent to win the state soccer championship, but did they have thedetermination to do so? The season began with a rocky start, includingproblems with several team members themselves, not to mention facingtough, higher-ranked competitors. But one game at a time, Central made itto the state competition. It was a harsh battle, and there were plenty oftears along the way, but Central survived the worst the season had to offerand earned the title of state champions.

BodyPoint 1

(Paragraph)

Support:anecdote

The will to succeed can train us to survive under extraordinarycircumstances, too. Such life-and-death situations are the subject of someof our most successful movies, including Titanic, the biggest box-officesuccess of all time. Rose, the movie's glamorous heroine, is in love withJack, and the two are struggling to stay alive as the ship goes down. In the

continued

Point 2(Paragraph)

Support:narrative example

final scenes of the movie, Jack dies and Rose is faced with the challengeof survival. She can stay in the water and risk the freezing temperaturesand the diminishing possibility of rescue, or she can use every remainingbit of strength left in her and summon the lifeboat that is many yardsaway, looking to pick up those alive in the water. As she sees the lifeboatgo by, she finds a small whistle, uses it to call the boat's occupants, and isrescued. Someone else might not have found the strength to go on, weakand exhausted in the freezing water, with a true love lost to such enormous disaster. Rose, however, found the will to survive.

Point 2(Paragraph)

Support:narrative example

The spirit of survival we admire in the heroine of Titanic can help us to endure less glamorous but equally difficult struggles. We find such a struggle in the couple Tommy and Gina, from the Bon Jovi song “Living on a Prayer.” In the lyrics, this couple can’t seem to get a break. Tommy works on the docks, but the union has been on strike, and he seems to be out of luck. His misfortune is mirrored by the fact that Gina works in a diner all day, just trying to make ends meet.

continued Point 3(Paragraph)

Support:narrative example

Exhausted, she cries every night, hoping they will be able to escape from the hardship that plagues their lives. No matter how hard things get, however, Tommy and Gina hold on for love. They believe in what they have together, and when times get rough, they remind each other that the love they have is enough to keep them going. Tommy and Gina have the will to survive; they prove their love for each other by showing how much they can truly take.

Point 3(Paragraph)

Support:narrative example

Our lives are plagued by loss, disease, and tragedy. Such adversityhelps build character, but more important, it shows whether we can step up to the challenges life presents. The will to survive comes from within each one of us. It is the factor that shapes the way we will be remembered.

Conclusion(Paragraph)

Reflection on the thesis

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