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Brought to you by Practical emotional intelligence workshop Sydney CBD: 15 September 2016 Parramatta: 28 September 2016

LYLEQ half day workshop

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Page 1: LYLEQ half day workshop

Brought to you by

Practical emotional intelligence workshop

Sydney CBD: 15 September 2016Parramatta: 28 September 2016

Page 2: LYLEQ half day workshop

Meet your presenter

Christopher Golis MBA MA FAICD FAIMAuthor, Coach & Workshop Leader

Graduate of Cambridge, LBS, SIAStarted working in 1967IT (general manager)

Financial Services (VC)Director of some 30 companiesNeverfail, Scitec/VeCommerce Nanyang Founder in 1994, raised $140mFellow of AICD and FAIMAuthor of 3 books & 8 e-books

Page 3: LYLEQ half day workshop

[email protected] 0418-222219 3

Conventional, self-controlled, formal Entrepreneurial, shrewd, hard-headed, materialistic

2

PSAQ instructions:1. For each pair quickly select one group or the other best describes your personal style.

Personal Style Assessment Questionnaire

2. Count the number of ‘1’s, ‘2’s, etc and thenplot the graph. (Total should = 21)

Golis
You can hand out the PSAQ before the talk starts and ask participants to include it. The key is to get each participant to prepare his own chart.
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Humm Profile Toby

0

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Component

Leve

l

Two peaks

Two troughs

Golis
Everyone has a different chart. There is no correct chart.
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Agenda

Define EQ The Humm-Wadsworth technology Empathy using TOPDOG Video: A visit to 7 Managers Social Skills Video: Productive Counselling Nicola Starr and Greg Flinders

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What is Emotional Intelligence?

The ability to perceive, control, and evaluate emotions

1990 Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer proposed EQ is like IQ

Inborn talent vs learned skill?

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Goleman publishes EQ in 1996

1. Self Awareness2. Self Management3. Social Awareness or

Empathy4. Social Skills or

Relationship managementNo model of core emotions!?

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People drive performance, emotions drive people, temperament drives emotions

Luck & memory very important Kings College, London study of

11,117 twins 58% of exam success due to genes 29% due to teachers & schools Nature 2x nurture Temperament = genetic emotional

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Page 9: LYLEQ half day workshop

EQ is achieving self- and social mastery by being smart with core emotions.

Self-Mastery = Awareness + Management

Social Mastery = Empathy + Social Skills

Temperament > Transient emotions

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The 7 core emotions 1920 Rosanoff: What drives our core

emotions? “We are all slightly mad” There are only 4 mental illnesses

1935 Humm & Wadsworth 7 components

1993 Empathy Selling The new names

Golis
The Humm Wadsworth was the first personality test ever developed.
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What is Emotional Intelligence?

Self Understandi

ngΨ test

Self InfluencingMindfulness

OthersUnderstandi

ngEmpathy

Others InfluencingSocial Skills

Self

Others

Understanding Influencing

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Social Awareness or Empathy

Cognitive empathy (conscious) Emotional empathy

(unconscious) Empathic concern

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Social Awareness - TOPDOG

Talk Organisation Position Dress Office (or Home or

Car) Gambit

Golis
Here I give out another handout and often will analyse someone else. If I am speaking at a joint seminar I generally use preceding speakers. As I analyse the speakers the jaws start dropping around the audience as they start seeing things in the speaker they had never seen before.
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Mover Desire to communicate Extrovert Active and dynamic Cheerful and

enthusiastic Either black or white Fluctuations in mood Multi-taskers

M = introverted, self-sufficient & independent

Golis
We now go through the seven components. At each component I ask did anyone have a peak at this component M=3. We also jointly analyse Rudd and Howard.
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Mover

• Talk - Friendly, jokey• Organisation - Retailers• Position - Front counter• Dress - Casual, bright colours• Office - Messy• Gambit - late but friendly

Golis
These are the clues that allow people to work out the emotional drives of other people.
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Doublechecker Desire for security Agreeable Cautious, double checkers Apprehensive and nervous Compassionate and

sympathetic Pessimistic and critical Low energy output but can

show D drive

D = High resilience, calm, composed, impulsive

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Doublechecker

• Talk - hypochondriacs• Organisation - Public service• Position - Administrator• Dress - Conservative, brown

cardigans• Office - Magpies, photos of

family or company

• Gambit - Punctual and friendly

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Artists Desire to create Sensitive & inquisitive Inarticulate, aloof and reserved Stubborn and single-minded Good visual imaginations Individualistic: beat to a

different drum

A = down-to-earth, reliable, frank & outspoken

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Artists• Talk - Inarticulate• Organisation - Creative• Position - Design• Dress - Oddball• Office - Tasteful• Gambit - Punctual but formal

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Politicians Desire to win Drivers & strivers Competitive and

assertive Defend fixed ideas

skillfully Suspicious

P = likable, relaxed, balanced

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Politician

• Talk - I-I-I• Organisation - Big• Position - Manager• Dress - Power• Office - Big, degrees on wall• Gambit - Late but formal

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Engineer

Desire to complete projects Conscientious Painstaking planners, read

everything Practical and objective Dedicated enthusiasm Hands-on operators

E = Jump in, erratic, slipshod

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Engineer

• Talk - Monotonic• Organisation - Builders and

developers• Position - Consultants• Dress - Pens in pocket • Office - Whiteboard, full

bookshelves• Gambit - Punctual (?) and

friendly

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Hustler Desire for material success Empathetic & Charming Astute, good financial acumen Love of gambling and

excitement Winners and losers Opportunistic Self-interest: WIIFM Egocentric

H naive, gullible, suckers, victim, martyr

Golis
I worked for Rene for 4 years as his inhouse venture capitalist. I have some great stories.
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Hustler

• Talk - Money, name dropper• Organisation - Wholesalers• Position - Brokers and agents• Dress - Flashy• Office – Showy and glitszy• Gambit - Punctual and friendly

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Normal Desire for order Non-neurotic &

Unemotional (cold fish?) Co-operative and law

abiding Mature and self-controlled Consistent and rational

(boring?) Self reliant and confidentN = Adaptable, rule breaker, carpe diem,

over-emotional, neurotic

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Normal

Talk - Logical, rational Organisation - Professional

Position - Accountant/CoSec Dress - Conservative

pinstripes Office - Neat and tidy Gambit - Punctual and

formal

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Normal

Normal is comparable to Freud’s superego:conscience, rules & standards

As your age increases, your Normal increases

The Normal is soluble; In vino veritas

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Humm Distribution:Not all factors are created =

N H M D A P E0%

10%

20%

30%

40%

50%

60%

70%

80%

90%

100%

40%

14%

56%52%

44%39%

57%

Dominant Humm Component DistributionSample size = 65,508 people

Component

% o

f pop

ulat

ion

havi

ng d

omin

ant c

ompo

nent

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Caveat 2:67% of individuals cluster around the average

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Caveat 3: The 7 components are like a web with several strong and several weak strands

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The Big 5

O = Openness to creativity C = Conscientiousness E = Extraversion A = Agreeableness N = Neuroticism (lack self-control)

Where is the dark triad? Corporate psychopath

Where is the Type ‘A’? Corporate bully

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The Big 5 & The Humm

O = Artist C = Engineer E = Mover A = Doublechecker N = NormalCorporate psychopath = Hustler & NCorporate bully = Politician & N

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Caveat 4: You can’t change your personality but you can change your behaviour

Source: Me, Myself, and Us: The Science of Personality and the Art of Well-Being by Brian R. Little

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The 4 steps of EQ Self Awareness Self Management Social Awareness Social Skills

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Social Skills

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. (Maya Angelou)

We like those who are like ourselves.

Golis
Again I refer to the book which has copious strategies about how to handle the various components. I love the Angelou quote
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Social SkillsFundamental attribution errorFailures/triumphs of someone due to

fundamental personal trait instead of looking at situation and context.

You forget something you are lazyWe forget something ∵ we are

overworkedEvery person on a project will say he did

50% of the [email protected] 0418-222219 38

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Social Skills for an N

• Who else is doing this?• Reference sales• Observe formalities• Agendas & action plans

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Social Skills for an H

How much is my discount?

Talk, dress and act like a winner

Name drop, lunches

Negotiate special terms

Signature on binding contract

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Social Skills for an M

Will the team like it?

Energy & enthusiasm

Meet other team members

Minimize the detail Keep in constant

contact

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Social Skills for an D

What are the risks? Keep it simple Zero choices Make up their mind Meet on Monday

morning

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Social Skills for an A

What if...? Lots of visuals Visual words: look,

see Imagine .... Sincerity &

sensitivity

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Social Skills for a P

What do you think? Use flattery Minor point closes Auditory words: listen,

hear, sound

When two Ps meet, it's an I for an I

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Social Skills for an E

Where’s the manual? Idealistic project Present new ideas in

detail Touch words: hot, cold,

feel Let them work with a

prototype

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Video Productive Counselling:Two case studies

What are the dominant components in the employee?

What are the dominant components in the supervisor?

Will the proposed strategies work?

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Case Study 1

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Case Study 2

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Page 49: LYLEQ half day workshop

Nicola Starr

1. What significant components make up Nicola Starr's temperament?

2. How will you handle her performance appraisal?

3. Are there likely to be any problems arising during the interview?

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Page 50: LYLEQ half day workshop

Nicola Starr ME N Staff most dislike inconsistency Sleep on decision Does this conflict with previous

decisions Bring tissues to performance

appraisal

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Page 51: LYLEQ half day workshop

Greg Flinders

1. What significant components make up Greg's temperament?

2. Is Greg tempermentally suited to be a Team Leader?

3. The heads of markeing and sales departments have complained to you that Greg is not sufficiently customer centric. What steps will you take?

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Page 52: LYLEQ half day workshop

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DPE A Good Operations ManagerNot IntrospectiveNew project = develop himself as a better manager

What makes a successful manager?People skills – use calendar of dates-ve or +ve criticism?Will need frequent encouragement

Greg Flinders

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One final warning

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Why I ♥ the Humm Easy to remember We have all 7 components Hot buttons Self control habits Improved empathy via TOPDOG We like those who are like ourselves Learn which components are anti-

you

Page 55: LYLEQ half day workshop

Q&A Forum Any ? Read the Humm Handbook Download white papers from

www.emotionalintelligencecourse.com

Sign up for my monthly newsletter

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