MENTORING

IS IT A GORDIAN KNOT?

Mentoring vs Coaching

Top performer DeficiencyBased on desire Based on needEquivalence HierarchyEvolution EvaluationSupport Appraisal Studies rolemodel Self examinationFuture oriented Current situationFree Fees

SHOWING YOUR TRUE COLOURS

• KNOW YOURSELF• BE AWARE WHAT IT EVOKES

IN OTHERS• SEE THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE

A LITTLE HELP

• 10 questions• Select 3 statements that match your habits• Assign 10, 5 qnd 3 points in line with the

extend to which they describe you• Do not take too long, it is only to get a feel

for your drives

1.What would trigger your irritation?

• O: If your manager keeps stressing the fact that all employees are equal

• Y: If you have to execute repetitive tasks• R: If your manager or peer shows weakness or emotion• P: If the organization decides to do away with proven

routines • G: If your manager keeps encouraging competition• T: If your teammembers or manager focus on self-

interest• B: If people revoke agreements

2.When do you speak up?

• Y: If you have to participate in compulsory group activities

• R: If someone doubts your strength or ability• O: If people focus on the investment and cost rather

than the revenue• G: If less talented employees are pressured to

perform better• T: If decisions are based on dogmatism• P: If overnight a turn-around in management is

introduced• B: If people make fun of rules and regulations

3.When do you loose interest?

• R: If your teammembers deny the hierarchy• Y: If the team lacks vision and a conceptual strategy• G: If your colleagues show opportunistic behaviour• P: If the organizational structure lacks a clear

hierarchy• O: If the management fails to reward achievement• B: If level-skipping takes place• T: If your manager or teammembers display

narrow-minded views

4. Which of the following reasons are acceptable to you for not sticking to an agreement?

• P: ‘We are used to do it in a different way and that has always worked well.’

• R: ‘I was pressed for time so I did something else.’• B: ‘It was against the rules.’• O: ‘It was the only way to meet the desired targets.’• G: ‘The agreement was humanly speaking

impossible.’• Y: ‘At second thought, the idea behind the agreement

was not correct.’• T: ‘The agreement was petty and irrelevant.’

5. What would cause you to consider leaving your organization?

• O: If rules and procedures become more important then results and bottomline

• R: If they don’t give me enough room to do things my way

• Y: If they lack a clear mission• G: If it becomes impossible to socialize during

workhours• B: If people fail to meet deadlines and ignore

procedures• P: If I can no longer take pride in what we do• T: If profit is the only purpose

6. Which statement represents your reaction to change?

• B: ‘Does this comply with the agreed procedures?’

• G: ‘Why change a winning team?’• Y: ‘Interesting, how does it fit in with our

concept and vision?’• R: ‘What is wrong with the way we are doing it?’• P: ‘Why don’t we respect tradition?’• O:‘Where is the beef? What is the benefit?’

7. What gives you a kick?

• G: Harmony and equality• B: Order and mutual appreciation• O: Being better then the others• R: Power and respect• P: Security and honour• Y: Working with a complex theory or concept

8. How do you define good teamwork?

• Y: When everybody contributes what he likes to do most

• G: When the team communicates well• O: When the team has a shared goal and interest• B: When everybody knows his task and the order of

activities• P: When we are like a family• R: When the team can rely on one another• T: When the members take an interest in one

another’s expertise knowledge

9. What do you consider one of your shortcomings?

• Y: I can be too theoretical• O: I can be too sensitive to status• R: I can be too impulsive• G: I can be too naive when it comes to

hidden agenda’s of others• T: I can be a dreamer• B: I can be too attached to procedures• P: I can be too informal

10. When do you consider something a good idea?

• P: When customs and tradition say it is so• R: When it suits me right here and now • B: When it conforms to the rules• O: When it serves my plans and objectives• G: When we have reached consensus on it• Y: When it is the most effective and functional

approach• T: When the living system of the world

ultimately benefits

SCORES

• Add up the totals• Rank them from high to low

MEANING OF THE PROFILES• Graves colour code on drives.• Researched and developed in 1957.• Human nature is not static. • Humans change as life conditions change. • New life conditions demand new rules for

thinking and acting, new drives.• ‘Old’ drives stay with us, though.• Thus, each person has different drives,

sometimes complementing, but often conflicting.

Drives, what is it about?

• Each person has his own drives. Drives are important in explaining behaviour and feelings, thinking and acting

• Drives derive from the way we look at this world: from world views

• But people have more world views at the same time …

World views

This world is full of chances. Go for

them!

The world is a place where people should

live in harmony

This world will be chaos if we do not stick to rules and

agreements

This world is actually a

jungle

This world is a nice complex puzzle

5 billion people on this earth, that

creates problems we should solve

We are all just a small piece in the

big circle of life

GRAVES PRINCIPLES

• There is no statistical relation between drives and:

sex intelligence ethnic background age

• Drives give direction to a person’s resources: his intelligence, emotions and his senses, regardless of the quality of those resources.

Purple

Blue

Red

Orange

Green

Yellow

Turquiose

safety, security

order, rules, duty

speed,power

Graves’ values theory

competition,be better

intellecual,conceptual

ideals, community

holistic,global

individual drives

groupdrives

Purple

Blue

Red

Orange

Green

Yellow

safety, security

order, rules duty

speed, power

competition,be better

intellecual,conceptual

ideals, community

holistic,globalTurquiose

Strengths Weaknesses

the real problems

theory is interesting

sense of community

purposeful, effective

loyal, reliable

conflict is OK

spirituality

vague, far-fetched

unpractical talk

soft, unrealistic

opportunist, egoïst

bureaucratic, rigid

conflict is damage

primitivePurple

Red

Blue

Orange

Green

Yellow

Turquoise

When you have a high PURPLE score:* you feel there is more between heaven and

earth.* the team you work with is important to you.* you value regular returning moments.* you have a feeling for the cyclical in life.* you are emphatic to the meaning of symbols.* if required, you’re willing to sacrifice yourself

for the good of the group.* you don’t always find it necessary to

manifest yourself as an individual.

Purple world view: This world is unsafe and incomprehensible. We must stick together and bond through rituals

Red world view: life is a jungle, everybody has to fight for his own space

When you have a high RED score: * you are decisive and sometimes impatient* you want things to be done NOW* you can react quick and impulsive * you have a keen eye on danger* you wanted to be treated with respect* you respect strength* you don’t have much faith in authorities* you are loyal to those you regard as your

friends

Blue world view: this world needs order which requires truthfulness, dedication, control and

discipline.When BLUE is dominant in your profile:* you are loyal to the systems you’ve chosen* you value rules and discipline* you truly finish what you started* you want your efforts to be appreciated* you value certainties and clear agreements* you observe if agreements are carried out

properly* you value justice* you think disobedience of agreements should be

punished

Orange world view: this world is full of opportunities. It’s up to you, and if you really want it, you can be succesful.

When there is a large quantity of ORANGE in your profile:

* you are competitive* you are strongly focused on changes and achieving

success* you take on challenges* you are strongly focused on targets and means* you think ”wanting” is more important than “being

able”* you want to be taken serious

Green world view: we are all equal, and all looking for love, harmony and warmth. It is important to

contribute to the community

When GREEN is dominant in your profile:* you have a social attitude* you can sense others feelings* you pay attention to the weak* you find mutual warmth and commitment

important* you think in essence all people are equal* you find normal behaviour foolish enough* you’re not after status and money* you loathe arrogance

Yellow world view: this world is full of complex systems, full of choices and dilemma’s. It is important to understand and

knowledge is a guarantee for freedom.

When YELLOW is dominant in your profile:* you are focused on knowledge and

understanding* you want freedom to act and think* you prefer to understand others, rather than to

judge and condemn them* fun motivates you* you think academically and often use models* you are inclined to view matters in a broader

perspective* you judge new ideas and theories with an

inquisitive mind

Turquoise world view: this world is a network of mutually dependant entities which are part

of a holistic organism.When TURQUOISE is dominant in your profile:* you view the world from a great distance* you value all that lives* you will put daily problems and fears into a

broad perspective* you’re not afraid of uncertainty and chaos* you’re not interested in material matters* you regard ecological- and foreign-aid issues

relevant to everyone* you are convinced that important problems

require a global and holistic approach

MENTOR

• Has travelled the route• Personal experience• Is a rolemodel• Looks at future success

COACH

• Knows how to read a map• Professional cognitive

expertise• Is a mirror• Looks at current success

MENTEE

• Rounded personality• Tangible achievements• Clear objective• Can point out why this

individual is the right mentor for her

Mentoring vs Coaching

Top performer DeficiencyBased on desire Based on needEquivalence HierarchyEvolution EvaluationSupport Appraisal Studies rolemodel Self examinationFuture oriented Current situationFree Fees

TOP PERFORMER

• Excells at her job• Lack of peers• Plenty of competitors• In between levels

DESIRE

• Looks for rolemodel• Seeks challenge• Outlet for courage and vision•Wants to achieve

EQUIVALENCE

• Mutual respect(experience mentor- courage mentee)• Vision on future trends (lessons

from the past - window on new generation’s views and drives)

EVOLUTION

• Based on talent and skill• Targetted actions• Targetted networking• Trial and error

SUPPORT

• Encouragement• Realistic feedback• Pull the brake• Share personal experience

and network

STUDY ROLEMODEL

• Identify specific skill or achievement• Analyse with what traits it was

achieved• Determine how it can be

acquired• Ask feedback on attempts

FUTURE ORIENTED

• Identify opportunities• Analyse what it requires to be in

the picture• Determine initiatives• Go for it• Ask feedback on outcome

WHAT CAN GO WRONG?

• Keeping the mentor happy• Pampering the mentee• Lack of mutual accountability• No sense of priority• Mismatch in terms of carreer, personality or

drives• No mutual understanding on frequency,

efforts required and goals

HOW TO PREVENT IT

• Open up to one another (mutual trust)• Talk TO and not ABOUT one another• Set goals and define expectations• Determine a frequency and plan ahead• Make action lists• Be transparant and realistic in feedback• Explore possible conflicts and how you will deal

with them• Mutual respect

OPEN UP

• Admit your failures and disappointments• Analyse what caused it• Share your pitfalls• Admit your insecurity or

doubt

TALKING TO AND NOT ABOUT

• Never air disappointment to third parties

• Don’t feel hurt, appreciate that the other takes the risk of evoking anger

• Word your comments from your perspective and ask how the other experiences it

GOALS AND EXPECTATIONS

• Be clear about individual goals and interests• Calibrate goals and expectations• Set tangible limits and priorities• Accept that you cannot address

everything at the time

LOGISTICS

• Plan the project and its ending• Make it a priority• Stick to promissed actions and

meetings• Use Skype if travel is a problem• Prepare yourself for meetings• Touch base frequently

FEEDBACK

• Is a gift• Communicate with respect• Sometimes says more about the

giver than the receiver• Do with it as you please

POSSIBLE CONFLICTS

• Explore what eachother’s attitude towards conflict is• Explain to one another what can

irritate you• Spend time to get to know

eachother’s habits and preferences• Decide how you will deal with

conflict beforehand

MUTUAL RESPECT

• Be aware of your individual habits and preferences• Be aware what you evoke in others• Word what you experience from

your own perspective• Don’t become eachother’s therapist

GOOD LUCKHAVE FUN

BENEFIT MUTUALLY