RABBI DAVID A. TWERSKY

----------------------------------TheDavid Twersky Spiritthrough hisClassic Speeches

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NOTJUST

SPEECHES(Volume II)

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"Not JustAnother Birthday"

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This book is dedicated to my motherOn the occasion of her

Eightieth BirthdayMay 8, 2003.

Mom, you continue to inspire me, to teach me and to motivate me as you

have throughout my life. Thanks again for all the love,

encouragement, and help you have always provided me and my family. May you continue to see only nachas

from your children, grand-children, and great-grandchildren… until 120 years!

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NOT JUST SPEECHES (Volume II)Table Of Contents

My Children Can't Be Grown Up Already –Where Did All The Years Go To?

Mordechai Twersky's Bar Mitzvah March 1999 Page 1Friday Evening Before Dena's Wedding to Moshe Luchins August 1999 Page 4Bris of Yitzchak Meir Luchins (First Grandson) November 2000 Page 9Pidyon HaBen of Yitzchok Mayer Luchins: November 2000 Page 12Shabbos of Alex's Ufruf December 2001 Page 15The Father's Actions Foreshadow December 2001 Page 20Twin Sisters Create A Special Situation December 2001 Page 22Bayis Ne'eman B'Yisrael December 2001 Page 24Pidyon Haben of Yehudah Shlomo Twersky November 2002 Page 26

Acting Rabbi – Speeches I Gave During Rabbi Kletenik's Sabbatical

Help From Heaven When the Bread Basket is Empty Succos 2000 Page 29Lech Lecha: And He Called In The Name of Hashem November 2000 Page 32Vayigash: NoteWorthy Comments by Ben Azai & Vilna Gaon January 2001 Page 35B'Shalach: I Have Been Young And Now I Have Grown Older February 2001 Page 38Bat Mitzvah of Yonah Malka Levin March 2001 Page 43Yom HaAtzmaut 5761 April 2001 Page 46

I don't do Board Meetings; But I Might Be Willing To Speak and Make People Bored At Their Organization's Meeting

BCMH Mens Club: Rav Baruch Shapiro's Yahrzeit October 1999 Page 51Torah, Avodah & Gemillas Chassodim: How do the 3 Pillars

of the World Support a Woman’s Quest for Spirituality? October 2002 Page 58Kollel Dinner: Master of Ceremonies January 2000 Page 69Seattle's Daf Yomi Siyum January 2003 Page 72

And Now It's Time To Say Good-bye…

In Memory of Mrs. Adele Frand August 2000 Page 75Aunt Adele Steinberg November 2000 Page 77Remembering Uncle "Eckie" July 2002 Page 79Not A Death Like "The Death Of All Men" September 2002 Page 81Siyum Mishnayos For The Shloshim Memorial of Ari Grashin October 2002 Page 83

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Table Of Contents(continued)

Not Just Correspondence

Dear Project Genesis / Rav Frand Mailing List Readers: August 2000 Page 85A Grandfather – Three Times Over June 2001 Page 87Thoughts On The Name: Ashira Esther June 2001 Page 89Esther Meira August 2001 Page 91Significant Others September 2001 Page 93May You See Children Born To Your Children, Peace on Israel Octoboer 2002 Page 95

Seven Blessings On Your Head – Mazal Tov! Mazal Tov!

Sheva Brochos of Aliza Tatel And Zvi Merzel August 2001 Page 97Sheva Brochos of Tova (Tatel) and Shiya Portowitz November 2001 Page 100Sheva Brochos of Ezra and Aliza Genauer September 2001 Page

102Sheva Brochos of Yishai and Saree Swigard December 2002 Page 105

David Twersky: The Lost Episodes (Speeches from the 1970s)

YU Freshman Shabbos 1970: The Limits of Freedom of Choice September 1970 Page 107JSS Kollel Shabbos October 1970 Page 109Depart From Evil and Do Good October 1971 Page 111Spiritual Mononucleosis November 1972 Page 114The Ninth Day Of Chanukah: Why Not December 1972 Page 117Free Will of Man (Bechira Chofshis) Mid 1970s Class Page 120Orthodox Jews Should Become Involved In Organizational Activity

With the Jewish Community At Large Circa 1978 Page 123

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My Children Can't Be

Grown Up Already

–Where Did

All The Years Go To?

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Mordechai Twersky's Bar MitzvahMarch 1999

In behalf of my wife Tzippy and myself, I'd like to welcome you all, to a very special event in the life of our son and in the life of our family -- a Seudas Mitzvah and Siyum to commemorate Mordy's Bar Mitzvah. As you walked in this evening, hopefully you picked up your high-tech place card which directed you to your proper table.

Actually, I have been working for the last several months on a computer program that I almost had perfected. I was hoping that as the guests would file in they would take a floppy disk and slip it into a personal computer we would have set up by the washing station. Each would be asked to respond to a few short questions about their communal prejudices, their political affiliations, their hashkafa, and interests, the people they like and dislike and the computer would then automatically assign them to the appropriate table and the appropriate section of the social hall.

Everything was ready to go into production with this software, but earlier in the week when we decided to give it a last minute test, we encountered a slight bug in the program. Tzippy and I were giving a demo to some of our other family members from out of town and we found out that the two of us were seated at different tables in opposite ends of the social hall. Oh well, as they say in the Association of Orthodox Jewish Programmers "better to have bugs in your software than in your salad".

Actually the floppy disk you picked up on the way in contains some 100 speeches or presentations I have delivered publicly over the last 25 years. We didn't want anyone to walk away this evening and complain that they didn't hear enough divrei Torah or enough speeches, so we've prepared this little goody-bag for you to take home and slip into your computer whenever you get the urge to hear another family simcha speech or the like.

In truth, Not Just Speeches is from start to finish, my mother's idea. For many years she has been encouraging and urging me that for my 50th birthday she would like to publish -- at least for my children -- a volume containing the collection of all my public speeches. The reason I have been able to put such a volume together is not because I am such a good speaker. If I were really a good speaker, I would speak extemporaneously or from a brief outline and have nothing to publish 25 years after the fact. On the contrary, because I am really a poor speaker, but rather a fairly decent writer, I carefully write down everything significant before I say it and consequently had it available as a permanent record which I could someday collect and make available for my children.

As things worked out, the collection was not quite ready for the milestone of my 50th birthday last Novemer, but Baruch Hashem, we did manage to put it all together for an equally significant family milestone -- the occassion of my youngest child becoming an adult. The volume as well as the associated floppy disk includes words I said at Mordy's Shalom Zachor and his Bris, as well as his own words that he will say from the pulpit this coming Shabbos, IY"H.

One of the things I said at his Shalom Zachor (which came at the conclusion of a rather hectic week during which I was somewhat under the weather) was the following:

People have been asking me how it feels to become a father again, for the fifth time. I've only somewhat tongue in cheek been saying that I feel like a grandfather. Having

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been on antibiotics all week, having lower back pain, a bad cough, and other aches and pains, I've jokingly said that my older kids can say about themselves that which Yosef's brothers said Yesh lanu Av Zaken, v'Yeled Zekunim katan -- we have an old father and a little boy, born to him in his old age.

Having the opportunity to recently proof read my remarks of 13 years ago and my quoting in reference to my son Mordechai, the verse refering to Binyomin as the Yeled Zekunim of Yakov Avinu, I could not help but think of a very interesting insight brought out by Ramba"n on his commentary to Bereishis.

The Chumash refers to Binyomin as the Yeled Zekunim of Yakov in Parshas Miketz.[44:20]. In Parshas Vayeshev we also find Yosef described as Ben Zekunim --"v'Yisrael ahav es Yosef m'kol banav ki ben zekunim hu lo..." [37:3]

Ramba"n calls our attention to the fact that the Targum translates the term Zekunim differently in Vayeshev than he does in Vayigash. In regards to the expression Yeled Zekunim katan, referring to Binyomin, Unkelus renders the translation "u'var sivtin, ze-air", meaning a small child of his old age. This is the way Rash"i and Even Ezra also understand the expression by Yosef "ki ben zekunim hu lo". They interpret that he was born in Yakov's old age. Unkelus however there interprets differently. He renders the expression as "ari bar chakim hu lei" -- because he was to him a wise son, based on the fact that the word Zaken can indicate wisdom as well as age, being an acronym, the Rabbis tell us for "Zeh Kanah Chachmah" -- this one has acquired wisdom.

Thirteen years ago, I referred to my young son Mordechai Michel as a Ben Zekunim in the sense of Unkelos' translation by Binyomin -- bar sivtin, the son of my old-age. Today, Baruch Hashem, I can still say about Mordechai that Ben Zekunim hu li, but I have in mind the rendition of the expression we find by Yosef, Bar Chakim hu lei.

Solomon tells us that Ben Chochom Yisamach Av, the wise son gladdens a father's heart. While this is certainly true in general, it is a particularly appropriate description when father and son engage in the ultimate activity of Simcha together -- the learning of Torah. It has been my greatest joy to be able to study Torah with all my children and in particular with my Ben Zekunim, who for the last several years has been my only child at home. Mordechai and I have studied for the past year Maseches Megillah and in recent months we spent time together learning Hilchos Tephillin. At this time I would like to call on Mordy to share with you some of the fruits of our labor.

I mentioned earlier that I enjoy being able to learn with my children. It would certainly, however, be a gross exageration to say that I am able to give undivided attention and the desired amount of time to this activity.

It is for this reason, that I am particularly grateful for all the partners I have had in this community and in this room in raising and in teaching Mordechai. Needless to say, my number one partner in raising my Ben Zekunim has been my own Eishes Neurim -- the wife of my youth. There is no way my children would be who they are and there is no way I would be who I am without my wonderful wife, Tzippy. This would be a good seguey into introducing Tzippy to say a few words, but she has declined my offer to have her speak, so instead I am going to seguey into an introduction of another set of partner I have in the raising of my children.

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Again quoting Mishlei, in Shlomo's world it was a simple matter of "Shma Beni, mussar Avicha" Listen my son to the instruction of your father. In today's world, for better or for worse, the father is usually only a junior partner in the Mussar Incorporated Corporation. The senior partners in this endeavour in the modern era have become the child's teachers and Rebbeim. I would at this time like to pay tribute to my senior partners -- Mordy's teachers and role-models from the community who have helped set him on the wonderful path he is headed upon today. Sincerest appreciation to Rabbis Blaut, Oppen, Skaist, Toledano, Engelsberg, Ginsberg, David, Goldsmith, Ben Zaquen, and our own Rabbi Kletenik. Also to Mrs. Lucy Varon, Mrs. Lori Peha Kezner; Mrs. Sheri Feuer, Mrs Leya Moskowitz, and Mrs. Kaden Oppenheimer. Finally, to two individuals who are neither SHA faculty members, nor Kollel members, nor Pulpit Rabbis but who greatly influenced Mordy and played a major role in his life (as they have in the lives of many others) in preparing him to play an active role as an adult member of this congregation: Mr. Gustav Samter, and Mr. Larry Russak.

Representing Mordy's teachers, I would like to call upon Mordy's current Rebbi to say a few words. Having had the opportunity to work particularly closely with Rabbi Engelsberg these past few months in matters of Inyanei Tzibur I feel I can almost call him my own Rebbi. He is a role model, he is a gentleman and a scholar; he has been a real asset and inspiration to me and to our entire communty. I give you Rabbi Shaul Engelsberg.

I want to take this opportunity to express my gratitude to all of Mordy's Aunts and Uncles -- the great ones and the "not so great ones" who came from out of town to be with us on this special occassion. We are very honored to have both of Mordy's grandmothers with us here this evening, my dear mother-in-law from Brooklyn, Mrs. Adele Yudin, and my dear mother Reva Twersky herself already a third generation member of this Congregation. Of course it gives the occassion an added thrill for us, to be reunited with our dear children from all over the globe, Moshe & Tzippy, CD & Sara, and Dena & Alex.

Rabbi Benjamin Yudin and Rabbi Abaraham Kupchik are great uncles to other members of the family, to Mordy they are only plain uncles -- but it is a great priviledge to have them both here. They were here for Moshe's Bar Mitzvah, we celebrated Alex's Bar Mitzvah together in New York, and I deeply appreciate their leaving their Congregation's and busy schedules in New York and New Jersey to join us for this weekend. I would like to call first on Rabbi Kupchik and then on Rabbi Yudin to share words of Torah with us.

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Friday Evening Before Dena's Wedding to Moshe LuchinsAugust 20, 1999

Good Shabbos everyone,

I would like to take this opportunity to welcome all of you to Seattle and to Congregation BCMH. We are in the presence of many distinguished guests, some I've known for many years, some I've known of; some I didn't know until now; some immediate family, some extended family, some future family, and some very dear and long time friends. To all of you, thanks for coming to join us in our Simcha. We hope you have a very pleasant Shabbos and weekend here with us.

I've often made the "kibbitz" in the past to friends of mine who are in Chinuch, that one of the inevitable Simanim that a new school year is about to begin is the reading of Parshas Ki Teitzei which prominently features the narration of the Ben Sorer U'Moreh -- the wayward and rebellious child.

Baruch Hashem, we are not here this evening to talk about children that are wayward and rebellious. Baruch Hashem the children we will make mention of this evening are at the other end of the spectrum. But nevertheless, Parshas Ki Teizei with all of its multi-dimensional richness has a most appropriate passage for the occasion of this weekend.

In the parsha this week we find the verse which begins Ki Tivneh Bayis Chadash (When you come to build a new home…) What four words could be more appropriate for a Chosson to read on the Shabbos of his Ufroof then the phrase Ki Tivneh Bayis Chadash.

Rash"i on that pasuk darshens Semichus HaParshiyos. He brings a homiletic lesson based on the juxtaposition of several seemingly unrelated Mitzvos. I too, would like to Darshen a Semichus HaParshiyos here this evening -- although with a different approach than Rash"i.

The Parsha immediately before the verse of Ki Tivneh Bayis Chadash is the Parsha of Shiluch HaKan. It is the Parsha which tells us the law of the person who comes to take away the young offspring from beneath the mother Tzipporah.

There are many approaches in Chaza"l to the mitzvah of Shiluch HaKan. Indeed analyzing the range of opinion of Meforshim on these few pesukim and the related Mishneh and Gemara in Brochos provide a fascinating insight into the Rabbinic perspective of Ta'amie HaMitzvos. But virtually everyone in discussing this matter takes into account the close emotional and psychological attachment between the mother Tzipporah and her young chicks.

Obviously parents have a close relationship to their children. For very many reasons it is also understandable -- Chaza"l already point it out -- that mothers have a closer relationship to their children, in general, than do fathers. Certainly when you throw in the gender bonding between a mother and daughter and finally when you consider the case of a youngest daughter to leave the nest you have a most powerful emotional and psychological connection that is about to be dramatically altered when this youngest daughter gets ready to 'fly the coop'.

We have with us tonight, a young man Moshe Aharon Luchins -- on his way to build a Bayis Chadash and he comes across a Tzipporah who is still roosting over her young chick.

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So far all of the above reasons I think it is most appropriate to discuss briefly with you tonight an idea which came to me that relates to the concept of Ki Tivneh Bayis Chadash that relates to the Parsha of Shiluch HaKan, that relates to the upcoming Yemie HaDin, that relates to the Kallah and that relates to the Chossen.

As I alluded to before, we find a fascinating dichotomy of Rabbinic opinion when in comes to the Mitzvah of Shiluch Hakan. On the one hand we have the famous statement of the Mishneh in Brochos: One who in his public prayers praises G-d for the fact that "His Mercy reaches to the nest of the Bird" is silenced. An opinion in the Gemara explains because he makes G-d's decrees into matters of mercy). Rash"I elaborates: G-d's intent by this command is not to show emotionalism or compassion, but rather to place upon Israel 'Chukei Gezeiros' incomprehensible decrees to make known that they are his servants who must keep his laws and decrees, despite the fact that the nations question the rationale for such commands and behavior.

On the other hand we do find numerous sources in the Talmud itself and certainly among the writings of the classic Rishonim that quote the law of Shiluch HaKan as a prototype example of G-d's mercy and concern for his creatures.

There is a significant body of Rabbinic literature which attempts to address this apparent dichotomy of Din / Gezeirah / Chok on the one hand and Rachamim / Chessed / Compassion on the other hand. I know that for a number of you, your bodies are operating 3 times zones later than Pacific Daylight Time, and I will not delve into this body of literature at this time.

But having hopefully raised your consciousness to this dichotomy of Din / Gezirah vs. Chessed / Rachamim in the Parsha of Shiluach HaKan, I would like to now focus in on the name of the Kallah -- Dena Bracha.

We gave our daughter the name Dena because she was born on Motzai Yom Kippur, the Yom HaDin and we gave her the name Bracha because we felt we were especially blessed in our Judgment that year to have our twins born just moments after concluding Neilah's Avinu Malkeinu prayer where we recited the words "fill our hands with your blessings".

Now usually we do not refer to Yom Kippur as Yom HaDin. The day of Rosh HaShannah comes more readily to mind when we use that title. The truth of the matter is, however, that both Rosh HaShannah and Yom Kippur are Yemei Din. They are part of a Din process which begins on Rosh HaShannah and concludes on Yom Kippur. (B'Rosh HaShannah Yikatesvun u'b'Yom Tzom Kippur Yeichaseimun).0

The Zohar speaks of Rosh HaShannah having a dual motif of Din. There is a motif of Dina Kashya (strong judgment) and there is a motif of Dina Rafya (soft Judgment). One source says the first day of Rosh HaShannah represents Dina Kashya and the Second day represents Dina Rafya. Another source says the firm Tekiyos represent Dina Kashya and the broken Teruos represent Dina Rafya. At any rate we find Rosh HaShannah has both aspects of Din.

Yom Kippur, on the other hand, has only one motif of Din -- it is entirely Dina Rafya -- the soft Judgement that comes together with Forgiveness and Atonement.

This concept of Dina Rafya, it seems to me, can be used to reconcile the dichotomy we mentioned above regarding Shiluach HaKan. Certainly it is a decree of G-d which we accept as a Gezeirah without attempting any rationalization or justification. Certainly if one tries to

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explain it purely in terms of emotionalism and mercy then we silence him. But even if it represents Din, it represents the type of Din which is a Dina Rafya -- a soft compassionate type of law which embodies the full range of compassion only completely understandable by the Av HaRachamim, the Father of all Compassion.

My daughter, Dena Bracha, has always for me -- been symbolically connected with the moment of her birth. She came at a time of Dina Rafya and she in her life has been a Dina Rafya. A person who is firm in her values in her standards and in her principles; but a person who is soft; understanding and caring; compassionate and forgiving.

And this Dena Bracha -- who like the moment of her birth and like the the Parsha of Shiluach HaKan has combined the elements of Din with softness and compassion has met and will become the life partner of a Moshe Aharon. The name Moshe represents Din v' Emes. The Lawgiver about whom we say Moshe Emes V'Toraso Emes; and the name Aharon represents softness -- the Ohev Shalom v'Rodef Shalom, The Divine Interceder who brought compassion, forgiveness, and atonement to the Jewish people. From what I have heard and from what I have seen, Moshe Aharon, like Dena Bracha -- lives fully up to the Midos alluded to in his name.

Ki Tivneh Bayis Chadash when you build a new house V'Asis Ma'akeh l'Gagecha -- one needs to make a fence. One can not build a house solely based on Din; solely based on Emes. On the other hand, neither can one build a Bayis Ne'eman solely based on mercy or emotion. The Din and Emes need to be fenced in by the Rachamim and the Rachamim needs to be fenced in by the Din and Emes. The Din must be the forgiving Dina Rafya of Yom Kippur rather than the firm Dina Kashya of the Tekios or of the first day of Rosh HaShannah.

This is a beautiful and appropriate Shidduch, may they build a Bayis Ne'eman B'Yisroel.

My Brocho to you, Moshe Aharon -- is hinted at in the verse which concludes the parsha I have been quoting: Shaleach Te'Shalach Es haEm -- may you never have any aggravation from your in-laws; V'HaBanim Tikach Lach -- may you raise a family of wonderful children to follow in the wonderful Middos of you and your Kallah. L'Maan Yitav Lach, v'harachta Yamim. May it be a long and wonderful marriage.

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Introduction for Alex Twersky

We used to say when the twins were younger that when Tzippy was pregnant with them she had a rather unique experience. Whenever she would pass a library building or a book store -- Dena would be pushing to get out; whenever she would pass the Kingdome or Husky Stadium, Alex would be pushing to get out!

Dena and Alex were never "identical twins"; but they have always had a lot in common and have had one of the most beautiful sibling relationships that I have ever observed. I would find it hard to believe that even Siamese twins share their moments of joy as well as their moments of pain as closely and as altruistically as Alex and Dena have done over the past twenty years.

Alex has come a long ways since the time we used to joke about his dedication to sports. I know he is a real Masmid the whole year in Yeshiva, but I thought at least when he came home for vacation over Pessach, he'd slow up and play a littel Ball. The only 'Ball' he had time for was the Sugya of Ba'al Yira-eh u-Ba'al Yimatzeh!

I mentioned last night that we could say about Dena Bracha that her name represented her personality. Alex's middle name is Ziskind. And he too is a wonderfully sweet kid. It gives me great pleasure to introduce the twin brother of the Kallah, Alexander Ziskind Twersky.

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Introduction for Rabbi Yissocher Frand

When I introduced Rabbi Yissocher Frand to speak at the Bris of my Bechor, Moshe Zvi, in this very Social Hall, some 25 years ago we were both in our 20s and I was able to make the statement "Rabbi Frand and I go back a long ways together". He delivered then a memorable Dvar Torah. When I introduced him to speak at the Bar Mitzvah reception of the Kallah's twin brother, Alex, some 8 years ago, we were both in our 40s and I was able to make the statement "Rabbi Frand and I go back a long long ways together". And he delivered a very memorable Dvar Torah.

We find at the end of Maseches Shabbos "With Torah scholars, the older they grow the more wisdom they acquire, for it is said 'With aged men is wisdom, and in length of days understanding' " Although I've aged as much as Rabbi Frand during the past 25 years, I unfortunately can't say that I've made the same type of progress in wisdom and understanding. But this is a very special occassion for me and I would like to share, before introducing Rabbi Frand a special thought.

As many of you know, Rabbi Frand and I were classmates for 10 years at the local day school now known as the Seattle Hebrew Academy. We graduated together from 9th grade in 1963. He was number 1 in the class and I was number 2. I went off to Public High School for 3 years; to college and graduate school in New York for 7 years; and have spent the last 26 years doing computing for Boeing. Rabbi Frand went off to Yeshivas Ner Israel and has spent the last 36 years there.

I recently wondered, if someone 36 years ago would have had a time machine and been able to provide the profile I have just outlined to our Junior high English teachers and asked them to predict -- based on this profile and based on their knowledge of our respective abilities -- what would become of David Twersky and what would become of Allan Frand by the year 2000? What would they have said? What would Mrs. Rosenbaum and Mr. Allport have said?

I don't think any of you had to be there to know what they would have said. "Oh David, he went to the Honors program in Garfield, he went on to YU and got a masters in Computers from New York University. He'll become world famous in the field of computers. He might write a best seller or two. Frand? He's closeted himself away in a Yeshiva all these years! He'll never amount to anything. You can bank on it, no one will recognize the name Allan Frand.

Well it may be true that no one will recognize the name Allan Frand, but the closest David Twersky got to world fame in the field of computers is by being involved in the transcribing of the much in-demand Droshos of Rabbi Yissocher Frand and helping post them on the Internet through the good auspices of Project Genesis. The closest I came to fame in my career at Boeing is by virtue of being mentioned (in an exaggerated fashion) in Rabbi Frand's new book in his chapter on Careers.

Rabbi Frand not only goes back a long long long way with me, but he is an individual who had an indispensible role in the making of this Shidduch. With great honor I call on a person who impressed Mrs. Rosenbaum and Mr. Allport almost 4 decades ago -- and would impress them even more today!

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Bris of Yitzchak Meir Luchins (First Grandson)November 4, 2000

I want to first of all thank all the friends and relatives who have come from near and far. I would especially like to thank the many hosts in the community of Passaic who on short notice have opened their homes to such a large contingent of guests. Finally, I want to thank my daughter and son-in-law for asking me to speak. And most of all I want to thank them for giving me something to speak about.

There are certain defining moments in every person’s life that stand etched in his or her memory –distinct and separate from all the other memories of life that inevitably blur and fade in the haze of passing time. Madison Ave. has given us a term for the capture of an unforgettable visual image. They are called – nisht Shabbos Geret – “Kodak Moments”. The memories I am referring to, however, are not always visual – they may be memories of meaning or emotion that can not be captured by a camera. I would refer to them, not as “Kodak Moments”, but as “Kodesh Moments”. The word Kodesh in its simplest meaning means separate and set-apart. “Kedoshim Teeheyu” – the Toras Kohanim says means “Perushim Teeheyu” – you should be a separate and set-apart nation.

One of the most powerful Kodesh Moments I have experienced in my life to this point came in July 1974. It was the moment when my wife Tzippy just gave birth to my first born son and I called my father, alav haShalom, to tell him the news and to tell him that we would be naming our first child after the young boy’s great-grandfather, my own father’s father – Moshe Tzvi, the Rebbe of Talne, zt”l. This was not a Kodak moment. We were talking over the phone, there was no picture to be snapped. But this was very much a Kodesh Moment, a moment which perhaps more than any other moment in our lives bonded us together and left an indelible mark in each of our memories.

In this week’s Parsha, Noach experiences a “Kodesh Moment” of his own which no doubt left an indelible mark on his mind and on the collective experience of humanity in general. It was that moment which occurred according to the Torah “l’es Erev” (shortly before evening) following his third attempt to send out a bird to check for dry land. “VaTavoh Eilav haYonah… v’Hinnei Alei Zayis Taraf B’Fiha” (And the dove returned to him and behold there was a branch of an Olive tree torn off in her mouth).

Noach experienced what no other person before or after had ever experienced -- the total destruction of the world as he knew it. Everything was buried. His life, his friends, his relatives, his farm, his land – all were gone. One can not imagine a more distressing image than that which confronted him, looking out from the window of the Teivah. Finally after many long long months, a dove returns with a tender branch of greenery in her mouth. True, what’s lost was lost. But there will be a future! The Olives and all the other fruit which he once enjoyed so much will again grow. The world which is gone will not return. But the genetic code has been preserved and a new world with new beginnings and fresh hope will yet emerge.

I have experienced today another Kodesh Moment which I am sure will be forever etched powerfully in my mind as long as I live. I today can appreciate fully for the first time, what my father must have felt when I made that memorable call to him some 26 years ago. When one loses a parent and one then sees his or her picture or recites a Yizkor or commemorates a Yahrtzeit – the feeling is very much like the feeling Noach must have had when the dove returned for the first time: "V’lo Matzah HaYonah Manoach l’Kaf Raglah” Literally the

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dove did not find rest for the sole of her foot. It is a feeling of despair, of hopeless sorrow, and irretrievable loss.

When however one has a grandchild who bears the name of the departed loved one, the emotion is totally transformed. It goes from an emotion represented by the dove with nothing in her mouth, to an emotion represented by the dove with the tender young olive branch in her mouth. The one who is lost will not return, but the genetic code has been preserved. A new young boy with the same name and much of the same DNA of the departed loved one, will again walk the earth. It is a most powerful Kodesh Moment. And I sincerely thank HaKodosh Baruch Hu for allowing me to experience it and I thank sincerely His two Shutfim in this three-way partnership.

I happened to be listening to one of Rabbi Frand's tapes recently and he mentioned in passing that just like when it comes to owning cars there is such a thing as "high maintenance vehicles" and "low maintenance vehicles", so too when it comes to raising children there is such a thing as "high maintenance children" and "low maintenance children". Some vehicles have a reputation that you can get by changing the oil every 6 months and the car will drive smoothly forever. With other vehicles, nisht Shabbos Geret it is quite a different story. And so too, l'havdil, it is with children. Some kids need a lot of parenting and some kids virtually raise themselves.I remember taking Dr. Edith Luchins, the great-grandmother, to the airport in Seattle following Moshe and Dena’s wedding. (And I must add -- speaking of great DNA -- bli ayin harah what a Zechus to have four living great-grandmothers and two living great-grandfathers to enjoy the nachas of the bris of a new great grand son.) My final words to her were that I wished her much Nachas from Moshe and Dena – and from all her grandchildren. She gave me an inquisitive look and asked why I was not wishing that she have nachas from her children also. I told her that I knew that from her children she already had Nachas. As only a Jewish mother could say, she responded. “This is true, so far they have given me a lot of Nachas. But I’m still waiting to see how they’re going to turn out!”

I am neither as wise, nor do I have as much patience as my mechutan’s mother. I am not prepared to wait any longer to proclaim that, Baruch Hashem, all our children have given Tzippy and I much Nachas.. But I must say – and I hope that my other children will not take offense – that while we have received and do receive equal Nachas from all our children, Baruch Hashem, Dena really excelled in being a "low maintenance child". Not only did she virtually raise herself, but from the youngest age she virtually raised her twin brother, Alex. It goes with out saying that by the time Mordechai came along Dena was a real surrogate mother and ready to take full control of the situation. By the time she was Bas Mitzvah, Dena was already able to apply Child Psychology towards her parents and by now I am sure she provides more psychological oil changes and tune-ups for her father than her father does for her. I'm sure that Dena will be a wonderful mother and that she and my dear son-in-law, Moshe, will both be wonderful parents.

I would just like to close with a brief thought which I saw on the Parsha, in a book called WaveLengths by Rabbi Macy Gordon, who happens to be my uncle’s brother and who used to be a Rabbi up the road in Teaneck.

Many times in Chumash we have stories of sibling rivalry in which one brother is portrayed as the hero and the other as the villain.. In the first part of Sefer Bereshis alone we have the struggles of Kayin and Hevel; Yitzchak and Yishmael; Yakov and Eisav. One can presume that Hevel, Yitzchak, and Yakov (the "good guys") were "Low-Maintenance children. Kayin, Yishmael, and Eisav (the "bad guys") on the other hand were probably "High

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Maintenance Children". Noah too had Shem the "low maintenance child", the good-guy and he had "Cham" the "high-maintenance, problem, child". But Noach had a third son as well – Yefes. Where does he fit in? Is he a good guy or a bad guy?

In the Chumash, the behavior of Yefes follows the pattern of his brother Shem. The Blessing that Noah reserves for him urges him to dwell in the proximity of Shem. But who really was Yeffes? Does he have an identity of his own?

The answer lies in his name. His name is from the Hebrew root that means beauty (Yaffeh). "Yaft Elokim l'Yeffet" (To this son, Japheth, G-d has given the gift of beauty) Yeffet is the patron of the esthetic. The glory that was Greece and the grandeur that was Rome are the legacy of Yeffet.

But does that make him a good guy or a bad guy? Noah in his blessing says, that depends. Beauty is neither good or bad, per say; it all depends on where it is found and how it is used. Beauty in the service of good becomes sanctified. Beauty in the trust of evil can be depravity. G-d gave Yeffet beauty, says Noah, but let him always make use of it in the tents of Shem. In this verse the Torah is making a clear statement about esthetics. Greek culture said, "If it is beautiful, it is good". The Torah counters "If it is good, then it is beautiful".

When modern culture speaks of "beautiful people" they are talking about people of visual beauty -- stars and starlets captured in Kodak Moments on the pages of People Magazine. On the other hand to whom does Jewish tradition refer when it speaks of someone as a "Sheiner yid" (a beautiful Jew)? He is not a jet-setter or the best-dressed man about town. A beautiful person is one who is charitable, kind, devout, gracious, and reverent. A person who experiences moments of Kodesh. Beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder, but the beholder has a sense of morality that tempers his esthetic appreciation. Beauty is G-d's endowment to Yeffet, but let him always reside in the tents of Shem.

My Bracha to Dena and Moshe is that their son – who certainly today qualifies already in one sense as a very "sheiner yid", should grow up as a "low maintenance child" and develop into a very "sheiner yid" in the fullest sense of the word.

I am grateful that Yaft Elokim l'Yeled. G-d has given me a very beautiful grandson and I pray that Yishkon b'Ohalei Shem he should grow up living under the protection of the Shechinah, the Divine Presence of G-d and he should grow up living under the influence and the aura of the Shem Tov -- of the wonderful name of the wonderful person whose name he carries. My father, alav haShalom, as his name implies was a Meir -- an enlightened and an enlightening person. He would spread his wisdom and great sechel with pleasantness, smiles, and laughter (Yizchak). He had a Shem Tov in the finest sense of the term and I am thrilled to know that my first grandson will carry that same Shem Tov throughout his life. Knowing that he will be growing up in the Ohel of Moshe and Dena and knowing that he will carry the Shem Tov of my dear father, of blessed memory, I have every confidence that he will in fact grow up to be a very "sheiner Yid" indeed.

May we all be able to share many moments of Kodesh together with each other in the future.

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Pidyon HaBen of Yitzchok Mayer Luchins:November 27, 2000

Originally I decided that I wasn't going to prepare a formal speech for this occasion. I told my son-in-law that I wasn't the kind of grandfather who was prone to spoil grandchildren and give them all the things that I never gave my own children. For my own Bechor, Moshe Zvi, I spoke only at his Bris and not at the Pidyon Haben -- so that would have to be good enough for Yizchok Mayer as well. Then I remembered that when Moshe Zvi was born I did speak twice -- once at the Shalom Zachor and once at the Bris. Since I didn't speak at Yitzchok's Mayer's Shalom Zachor, I figured that maybe I do "owe him one".

When I introduced my son Alex who spoke at the Shabbos Seudah before Dena and Moshe's wedding, I mentioned the family Kibbitz we used to say based on the Chazal that Rashi quotes at the beginning of this week's Parsha: When Tzippy was pregnant with our twins she used to experience the following: Whenever she would pass a library -- Dena would push to get out, and whenever she would pass the KingDome (where the Mariners and Seahawks used to play) Alex would push to get out.

I always enjoy saying over a cute thought that I once heard on this Chazal, that is I think relevant to the idea I wish to mention this afternoon. Rav Simlai taught that a Malach teaches a child the entire Torah while he is still in his mother's womb. So the question is -- we understand very well why Eisav was fighting to emerge from the womb when his mother passed a house of Idol worship, as Rashi brings. But Yakov was learning Torah from a Malach -- why would he be so anxious to get out when Rivka passed the Yeshiva of Shem V'Ever. The answer is that you can be in the best Yeshiva in the world and have a Malach as your Rebbi -- but if your womb-mate is Eisav, you've to get out of there!

On a more serious vein, I spoke at the Bris on the great significance the name Yizchak Meir has for me and for all who knew my father. From the perspective of Chumash of course there is some what of an ambivalent element in the name Yitzchak in that, among other things, it recalls a "tayna" (complaint) that HaKadosh Baruch Hu seems to have had against Sara Imeinu. "Lamah zeh Tzachaka Sara" -- why did Sara laugh when she was told of the news of the birth of Yitzchak, implying that there was some type of lack of Bitachon on Sara's part by this reaction.

The question can be asked however, and I heard this thought from one of Rabbi Frand's tapes, what was the complaint against Sarah? She wasn't aware this was a prophetic message. She was not aware of the identity of the strangers that Avraham brought into the house. Avraham brought a lot of characters home with him. If one would meet a stranger on the street who made a fantastic unbelievable prediction about one's future, should one be faulted for laughing at this prediction? After all we are not required -- in fact it would be foolish -- to believe everything every stranger off the street tells us.

Rabbi Frand quoted the following idea as being the "tayna" against Sarah. It is not that Sarah should have necessarily believed these strangers, but she should have said "Amen". In other words, it is the idea of "al tehi birkas hedyot Kallah b'einecha" -- one should not take lightly a blessing, regardless of its source. Sometimes it is davka the Bracha of a simple person which HaKadosh Baruch Hu will act upon. By responding Amen to each and every Bracha we are given -- indeed by soliciting Brachos at all appropriate opportunities -- one testifies to his belief in the power of a Bracha to invoke the Rachamim and Chessed of Hashem in fulfilling these Brachos.

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Rabbi Frand told an incident involving a fellow who came to the Steipler Gaon and asked him for a Bracha for a Shidduch for his daughter who was already past the age when her father felt she should have found a Shidduch already. Rather than immediately give a Bracha, the Steipler asked the fellow "tell me, did you make a Kiddush for your daughter when she was born"? The father was taken aback somewhat, but had to admit that no, she was already the third or fourth child. For his first or second daughter he had made a Kiddush, but by the time this daughter was born -- for whatever reason -- he did not make a Kiddush.

The Steipler advised, go make a Kiddush for your daughter! He explained that when a child is born and you make a Simcha commemorating the event, inevitably people come over and wish you Mazal Tov and give you Brochos. You should have nachas from your children, she should grow up to be this and that, she should have an easy time finding a Shidduch, etc., etc. These brochos may come from very simple individuals, but one never knows to whose Bracha, the Hashgocha will respond. "You denied your daughter the opportunity of receiving such Brochas. It is not too late. Go make a Kiddush in her honor, you will receive Brochos for her from your friends -- and G-d will respond to these Brochos". And so it was.

Well if truth be told, I didn't make a Kiddush when Dena was born.... She was, after all, my third child. Fortunately, however, Dena had a twin brother and at Alex's bris when people came over to wish my wife and I Mazal Tov they invariably offered a Bracha for Dena as well. No doubt, many people offered the wish that Dena should grow up and have an easy time finding a Shidduch and should herself raise a Bayis Ne'eman BiYisroel. Al Tehay Birkas Hedyot Kallah Be'Einecha -- obviously HaKadosh Baruch Hu, listened to one of those Brochos and with Chessed and Rachamim, we have merited to begin to see the fulfillment of these blessings.

In that vein I just want to extend my own Bracha to Moshe and Dena and Yitzchak Mayer on this special occasion.

We are celebrating today a "Pidyon HaBen". What does the word "Pidyon" mean? I believe we can get insight from the juxtaposition of two similar but distinct verbs from our daily davening. We say "Mimitzrayim Gealtanu, u'm'Beis Avadim Pedeesanu" Loosely translated we have here a redundancy: You have redeemed us from Egypt and from the House of Slavery you have redeemed us". But there is clearly a nuance of difference between the words "Ge-altanu" and "Pedee-sanu". I believe the difference is as follows. From Egypt we needed to be taken out completely. Therefore the word "Geulah" is used as in the phrase "Geulah Shleima" -- a complete removal from Egypt. "As you see the Egyptians today, you will see them nevermore, forever." From the House of Slavery, however it was not "Geulah", it was "Pedeeyah". Pidyon usually indicates a redemption in which some type of substitution is involved. I believe it is not far fetched to say that the phrase U'm'Beis Avadim Pedeesanu alludes to the fact that we were not totally removed from the House of Slavery, it is just that we left the category of "Avadim l'Avadim" and were redeemed into the higher category of "Avadai Heim". We would no longer be the servants of Pharoah, but now we would be the servants of G-d Himself."

I want to suggest that the same idea can apply to Pidyon HaBen. Originally the first born son belongs to the Kohen. From that perspective he would be obligated to be raised according to the Chinuch of the strict regiment of being an Eved HaShem as defined by the Avodas HaKohanim which is very detailed and very circumscribed by all the rules and regulations we find in Toras Kohanim.

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We actually find in Tanach, a case of a Peter Rechem who it seems at least symbolically, if not literally, did not have a Pidyon HaBen. Shmuel, the first born son of Elkanah and Channa, was given over to Eli to be raised not by his parents but to be raised by Eli as the type of Eved HaShem that the Kohen Gadol himself saw fit to raise, according to his standards and his world outlook.

In most cases, of course, this is not the case. But although the father may take the son out of the domain of the Kohein, it should be noted that the father is not "Goel" his son in the sense that he will not be an Eved HaShem at all (Chas V'Shalom), but rather he is "Podeh" him. He is redeeming his son in the sense of agreeing to take him off the hands of the Kohein, and offering him a substitute form of Chinuch. The First Born Son will still be raised as an Eved HaShem, but it will be the Chinuch that is based on the unique Minhagim and the unique Hashkafos and the unique Kochos that are found in the house of the family into which he is born.

It is my Bracha that Moshe and Dena should be very Matzliach in raising and be Mechanech their first born son according to his own unique Kochos in the wonderful Minhagim and HaShkafos of Kiruv and Chessed, and Ahavas Torah and Ahavas Yisroel that exists in their family and that exists in the extended families m'dor Dor into which he was born. I bless the extended families that they should all live to see Yiddishe Nachas from young Yitzchok Mayer and that we should be together at his Bar Mitzvah and see him grow up to be Nichnas L'Torah, L'Chuppah, ul'Maasim Tovim.

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Shabbos of Alex's UfrufDecember 1. 2001

When we see our children fall-in-love and find their destined zivug we cannot help but marvel at that special gift that HaKodesh Baruch Hu has placed in this world whereby He allows an individual to recognize and be convinced that there is another individual that was placed in this world specially for him. A young man is very fortunate when he discovers at an early age -- such an individual and recognizes that by pairing up and establishing a long term relationship with that other person he will be able to grow and develop and reach his full potential in life. He is even more fortunate when that discovery comes b'geder "Love at first sight".

That is the fortune, my son Alex had more than 5 years ago when he first met Rav Chaim Ilson. It was love at first sight. Although Yeshivas Derech HaTalmud was at the time, just a twinkle in Rav Ilson's eye – when Alex heard him give Shiurim at the Morasha Kollel in the summer of 1996, he recognized and was determined that Rav Ilson was the person that he wanted to make his Rebbe Muvhak. And b'geder Lechteich Acharay Bamidbar, b'Eretz Lo Zeruah, Alex did not care if Rav Ilson's yeshiva was accredited or not, he didn't care if it had a building or not. "If Rav Ilson opens up his doors, I will be there" was his attitude.

Baruch Hashem, the Zivug has been "oleh yafeh". The progress in learning that Alex has made in the intervening years is remarkable. I have a strong sense that the feeling of admiration that Alex has for his Rosh Yeshiva is mutual and we are very honored and appreciative to have Rav Ilson with us in New York for the Chassanah to be the Mesader Kiddushin, and especially to have him with us here in Flatbush for the Ufruf Shabbos.

This has been b'geder "Birshus HaRav". Now to proceed with my "drasha."…I want to first of all sincerely thank the Wiklers – Sara and Yosef and their children -- for inconveniencing themselves and for hosting so many of my family members on this special Shabbos for the Twerskys. Besides being the Shabbos before Alex's Wedding, this is a special Shabbos featuring an all too infrequent "family reunion" which reunites siblings with each other and which reunites children with parents and parents with children.

I would like to use the theme of family reunions, the Parshas HaShavua, and Alex's upcoming marriage to express a few thoughts on this occasion. In other words allow me to share with you an excerpt from the chapter in my memoirs entitled "Not Just Ufrufs".

Parshas Vayishlach is a Parsha in which family reunion plays a very central role. It is the first meeting between Eisav and Yakov in some 34 years. As always, when relatives who have gone their different ways in life and have not seen each other for a long time get together, there is some anxiety and nervousness on the part of each sibling in anticipation of the reunion. But thank G-d both siblings are on their best behavior and the reunion goes far better than either anticipated. That is a story we are all familiar with.

But what intrigues me this Shabbos, is the other dimension of family reunion that occurs, or at least should be occurring, in our Parsha – not the reunion between siblings, but the reunion between Yakov and his parents. The question that has always bothered me is – what was that reunion like? Why does the Torah tell us virtually nothing about it?

After all, it was at the behest of his parents that Yakov left home. Now after all these years, without telephone connection, without e-mail, perhaps even without regular mail, years

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without sending photos of the family – Yakov is finally back home in Eretz Canaan with his wives and children. Where is the Torah's description of his tearful reunion with his parents? Where is the parallel scene to that powerful reunion between Yakov and Yosef of which we will read in a few short weeks? It's not there! Why not?

According to the Agadah we are told that there never was a reunion between Yakov and his mother. We are told that the name Alon Bachus, the "weeping Oak tree" referring to the place where Yakov buried his mother's nursemaid, alludes to the fact that at the same time that Devorah died, Yakov was informed of a second death – that of his beloved mother. Rivka was the person who ran interference for Yakov with his father and salvaged the blessings for her favorite son. She was the person who was prepared to unselfishly send far away the only nachas she had in life – for his benefit, so that he would be spared the wrath of his brother, and so that he would marry properly and raise a proper family in the tradition of his parents. And yet, according to this Agadah, Rivkah was never reunited with her beloved Yakov after all those years of separation. She never got to meet the daughters-in-law for whom she sent him away. She never got to see those beautiful grandchildren the fruit of that painful separation from her son, that she willingly accepted upon herself and even encouraged. Unfortunately that is the way life sometimes go – you send your beloved children away for their benefit – and you never get to see them again.

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But what about the reunion with Yitzchak? Yakov and Yitzchak were re-united. They co-resided in Eretz Canaan, most likely they co-resided in the same neighborhood of Chevron for another 20 years. But there is no mention of this re-union. There is no mention in the Torah even of any dialogue between them at any time after Yakov's return from Padan Aram. On the contrary, there is specific mention in Chazal of a hard-to-understand lack of communication between them. Yitzchak remained alive for 12 years after the sale of Yosef. According to our Sages Yitzchak knew through Ruach HaKodesh that Yosef was alive and well. He knew that his son Yakov was in perpetual mourning for his beloved Yosef, but Yitzchak did not tell Yakov that Yosef was still alive. He did not even urge him to stop mourning.

What goes on here? Was Yitzchak still upset at Yakov for fooling him regarding the Brochos? Was Yitzchak holding a grudge that Yakov spent 36 years away, and did not write home frequently enough? Was he unhappy with some change in Yakov that transpired while he was in the house of Lavan – or perhaps that transpired while he was learning in the Yeshiva of Shem v'Ever? What goes on here?

What I'm going to say is not P'shat. It is not even authentic Derush. But I think there is a Remez here and I believe it is a Remez that is appropriate to point out on the occasion of Alex's Ufruf Shabbos and on the occasion of this rare simultaneous reunion with all my married children.

I think there is a message in the fact that we find no recorded dialogue between Yakov and his father Yitzchak in all the years after Yakov returned from Padan Aram. In fact I think it is not just coincidental that we likewise find no recorded dialogue between Yitzchak and his father Avraham in all the years after the Akeida. The common denominator that explains this lack of "I-Thou" conversation, this absence of "Vayelchu shneihem Yachdav" at this particular point in their respective lifetimes is the following: Yakov when he is in proximity with Yitzchak in Parshas VaYishlach and beyond and Yitzchak when he is in proximity with Avraham in Parshas Chayei Sarah and beyond are married men already. At this point, they had their own wives, their own lives, and their own families.

It is one thing for a father to speak to a child, to try to mold the child, to try to guide the child, to give him or her mussar and advice as needed when the child is single. Then we can have a "Vayelchu shneihem Yachdav" dialogue and interchange. Then a one-on-one heart to heart conversation makes sense and is appropriate. Then a father can summon a child to his bedside and intimately proclaim "Gesha nah u'shakah li beni" (Come closer and kiss me, my son). That is the appropriate time for parents to pour out their aspirations and blessings, their hopes and dreams for their children, their sons and their daughters.

But once Yitzchak brought Rivkah into his mother's tent, once Yakov set out from Be'er Sheva and headed to Charan a new dynamic came into play in the father-son relationship. It was that basic metaphysical law formulated by the Torah at the very dawn of man's creation: "Al ken Ya'azov ish es Aviv v'es Imo; v'Davak b'Ishto" (A man shall therefore leave his father and his mother and

be united with his wife). Once the son or the daughter has formed their own marital relationship, once they have begun to form their own family unit – the time has come for the parents to stop raising their children. One may still wait on the sidelines anxious to see how the children will "finally turn out when they grow up", but the time for molding, the time for mussar, the time for intervention and interference in their life's decisions has come and gone.

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At the Shabbos Seudah before Sara's Chasunah I compared my relationship to Sara growing up to that of Yakov and Yosef. [Ayen my chapter on "Ufrufs: Not Just Throwing Things At Your Kids"]. If I had to pick a paradigm among the Avos to characterize my relationship with Alex growing up it would no doubt be that of Yitzchak and Yakov. And it's not because I commanded him to find a wife from the birthplace of his mother. I did not do that. But, like Yitzchak with Yakov, I misjudged my son. In a sense – I don't know whether it was willingly or unwillingly – Alex fooled me!

I always thought that of all my children, Alex came closest to being my clone. Indeed throughout elementary school he was always overshadowed by a more academically outstanding classmate, as was I. During his early teen-age years he stayed home in Seattle and attended a high school whose environment and philosophy would clash significantly with that of the atmosphere and values of the institutions where he would later spend his formative post-high school years, as did I. As did I, he headed off to YU. As did I he applied and was accepted to spend a year studying in KBY. As did I, he wore Kippot. And as did I, he fell in love with a Brooklyn girl and proceeded to make plans to take that girl far away from the family and neighborhood where she grew up.

But I misjudged Alex. I was really fooled, if I thought, that he was growing up to be my clone. On Moshe's Ufruf Shabbos, I spoke about the difference between "Zeh Keli; and Elokai Avi" -- (My G-d and The G-d of My fathers). I mentioned the fact that it is normal and even appropriate for a father and son to relate to G-d and to spiritual matters differently from one another. I pointed out that in our own family we have a long tradition of fathers and sons adopting different paths in their respective modes and models of Avodas HaShem.

This is not unique in our family. Chazal contrast the Avodas HaShem of the Avos. Avraham served G-d with Midas haChessed; Yitzchak with Gevurah, and Yakov with Tiferes. This is not just a difference that became apparent in hindsight to later generations. Yakov himself recognized that there was a difference between "his G-d", "his father's G-d", and "his grand-father's G-d": He referred to the G-d of his grandfather as "Elo-kai Avraham", but he referred to the G-d of his father as "Pachad Aviv Yitzchak", literally "the Fear of his father, Isaac".

I admire Alex very much. Over the past several years on each visit home, he never failed to amaze me and impress me with his learning maturity and with his laser-like focus of purpose to continue growing in Torah knowledge. He has already far outpaced me in terms of Torah learning and unadulterated Avodas Hashem. He aspires to even greater achievement in both these areas. Alex has chosen values and goals in life that his father very much identifies with. But there is one area where Alex has always differed from his father and indeed this difference of personality and outlook on life have led to other differences as well.

The immediate family members all know, that Alex was always called "Mr. Cool" in our household. That was not because of his haircut or the type of clothes he wore or the friends he would hang out with. Alex was Mr. Cool, because he was always "cool as a cucumber". He took things in stride. He was always calm. He never worried about what was going to be and he was never in awe of people or situations. If his parents or teachers had a complaint about Alex, it was that he was sometimes "too flippant". It irritated them that he did not take things more seriously.

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In this Middah, Alex is certainly not a clone of his father. On the contrary, Alex knows I'm a worrier. I'm a pessimist. I'm a nervous person. I've always been like that – and if anything I'm getting worse in my old age. So when it came to making life decisions, when it came to planning to remain in Kollel and to starting his married life in Eretz Yisroel, Alex decided to follow the path of Elokei Achiv Moshe (the G-d of his brother Moshe), rather than the path of Pachad Aviv Dovid (the Fear of his father, David).

Alex fooled me! When he asked for my Bracha to spend that first year or two in Derech HaTalmud, I never expected that his plans would take the direction they are now taking. I knew, that in a sense history was repeating itself. But I said to myself "haKol Kol Moshe Zvi" (the voice asking to stay in Eretz Yisroel just one more year, is the same voice that I heard from his brother Moshe when he started out in Rabbi Meisselman's Yeshiva. But I consoled myself that "haKipa, Kipas Dovid Aryeh" – Alex wasn't wearing a Black hat yet, his head covering was still that of his father, David.

In conclusion, I want to say, that although Yitzchak originally gave the Bracha of "M'tal haShamayim, u'miShmanei ha'Aretz" (from the dew of the Heaven and from the fat of the earth) to Yakov under false pretenses, and although it was only begrudgingly that he ratified it after-the-fact "Gam Baruch Yi-heye" (the blessing will remain his), there is a second Bracha that he gave to Yakov, at the end of Parshas Toldos, with full awareness of the identity and of the nature of his son. "V'Yiten lecha es Birkas Avraham, lecha u'lzar-acha itach, l'Rishtecha es Eretz Megurecha asher nasan Elokim l'Avraham". This was the unique blessing of G-d to Avraham which was passed down to Yitzchak – the blessing of inheriting the Land of his Sojourning, Eretz Yisroel.

Alex, the Gemara in Brochos says that G-d's three great presents to the Jewish people -- Torah, Eretz Yisroel, and Olam HaBah -- are only acquired through suffering. The attribute of Pachad Avicha has no doubt, during my life time minimized the portion I have been able to acquire in each of these three Matanos. My Bracha to you, the one I give to you today, when I am fully aware of your identity and your strength of character and personality, is that you should always be able to maintain your sense of calm and confidence in pursuing and acquiring a much larger share in each of these Matanos than your father has attained. To paraphrase Yakov's blessing to Yosef: "Birchos Banai gavru al Birchos Horeihem". The spiritual aspirations and achievements of my children have exceeded those of their father. May you and your life-partner and your siblings along with their life-partners continue to bring Nachas and Zechut to your parents, to the entire Mishpacha, and to all of Klal Yisrael.

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The Father's Actions Foreshadow …December 2001

Children's Sheva Brochos are by their very nature a bitter-sweet occasion for parents. On the one hand, when a parent sits across the table from a newly married son or daughter sitting next to their newly acquired daughter-in-law or son-in-law, there is undoubtedly pride and satisfaction at seeing their child reach this happy milestone in their life. On the other hand, to be honest there is also a sense of sadness and angst at the knowledge that a barrier of separation has to some extent descended between you and your child – the mechitza of "Al Ken Yazov Ish es aviv v'Es Imo" has been permanently erected between parent and child.

Now we all know, in today's Orthodox society there are different kinds of mechitzos. Some mechitzos are taller than others; some are thicker than others. Sometimes the mechitza separation is made up of a main floor and a balcony; sometimes it is two separate rooms. Sometimes you can see through the Mechitza; sometimes you can see over the Mechitza; sometimes you can not.

Mechitzos are very symbolic. The rule with my childrens' weddings have been the bigger the Mechitza during the wedding, the more we have been separated from them after the wedding. If you will excuse the pun, "Ma'aseh Avus" – from lashon Aveh – meaning thick – the more thick the Mechitza at the wedding, Siman Levainm (from lashon leveinah, meaning brick) -- the more your efforts to have your children move back to Seattle are like banging your head against a brick wall!

Sara had the least imposing Mechitza at her Chassanah – and we still have hopes of getting Sara and Chaim back to Seattle one day. Dena's Mechitza was more substantial but at least you could see through it and see around it and we are still in the same country as Dena, we get to see her family a few times a year, b'Ezras HaShem. By Moshe and Alex's Chassanahs the Mechitzas were truly symbolic of the geographic and cultural distance which separates Seattle from Yerushalayim and the likelihood of having them permanently come back with their families to Seahawks, Sonics, and Starbucks after years of Kodesh, Kollel, and Kotel are truly b'geder Ma'aseh Avus Siman Levainim.

And as I see my children, one by one go off and leave Artzam, u'Moladetam, u'Beis Avosam (their land, their birthplace, the house of their parents) – I do have bitter-sweet emotions. I am happy for them that they have found wonderful spouses and wonderful communities, but I miss them and I miss the grandchildren and I am haunted by a Seforno in this week's Parsha.

The Seforno's comment is at the beginning of Perek 38 – the story of Yehudah and Tamar – on the words "Vayehi B'Es Ha-hi" (and it was at that time). All of the commentaries are intrigued by the interruption of the narrative of the sale of Yosef by this seemingly unconnected story of Yehuda and Tamar. Why is this story placed here and why does it begin with the words "And it was that time". Seforno offers a penetrating interpretation.

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He says that Yehuda was the one responsible for the fact that Yakov was bereft of his beloved son Yosef. It was Yehuda who suggested "Lechu v'Nimkerenu l'Yishmeylm" (Come let us sell him to the Ismaelites) rather than return him safely to his father's home. Consequently G-d dealt with Yehudah midah k'neged midah and caused him to be bereft of two of his own sons.

This is very harsh and very frightening. After all, Yehudah's intentions were not evil. He was trying to limit the damage. The alternative being considered to the sale of Yosef was his death. It was that possibility that Yehuda was trying to avert. And yet there was collateral consequences of the sale. Yosef was saved. But he was taken away from his father. Yakov was left mourning the loss of his ben zekunim. The pain Yehudah thus inflected on his father, even though unintentional, was something he would eventually have to experience himself.

Es Chatai ani Mazkir Hayom. (I confess my sin today). I was responsible for taking away a Bas Zekunim -- far away from her land, her birthplace, and from the house of her parents. Although it was certainly unintentional, I'm sure this caused both initially and also over the years a certain degree of anguish to my father-in-law of Blessed Memory and – tibadel l'Chayim, to Bubby. And I'm sure that to some extent the pain I feel as my children get married and move far away from the house of their parents is somewhat of a Heavenly payback along the lines suggested by the Seforno at the beginning of Perek 38.

My only consolation is that if in fact Ma'aseh Avos Siman L'Banim – if the actions of the earlier generation does in fact foreshadow what will be the case in subsequent generations – then I am not totally despondent. Baruch HaShem, despite the distance, despite the separation Zeidei in those few years and Bubby Thank G-d for these many years have maintained a close and loving connection with the "distant relatives" in Seattle. From a distance of a continent or a distance of Eternity, Bubby and Zeidei have seen abundant nachas from their grandchildren who were born so far away from "Beis Zikneihem", the house of their grandparents – and hopefully they have seen nachas too from their daughter who was taken from them and perhaps also even from their son-in-law who was responsible for this separation.

Yehi Ratzon that Tzippy and I, too, be able to maintain a close and loving connection with our "distant relatives" and may we see only nachas from our children and grandchildren – wherever they may be. I quote, in particular regarding our children in Israel – Moshe and Nomi, and now Alex and Chani – the Chosson v'Kallah the words of King David in reconciling himself with the loss of his firstborn son from Bas-Sheva: "Ha-Uchal L'hasheevo od. Ani holech eilav, v'hu lo yashuv eilay" Can I bring him back again? I will be going to him, but he will not return to me.

Hashem, our G-d, let there soon be heard in the cities of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem the sound of joy and the sound of gladness, the voice of the groom and the voice of the bride, the sound of the grooms' jubilance from their canopies and of youths from their song-filled feasts. May there also be heard the sound of parents having nachas from their children and grandchildren and the sounds of siblings being reunited with their brothers and sisters. May it all be hastened by the sound of the Shofar and the sounds of the footsteps of Moshiach, speedily in our day.

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Twin Sisters Create A Special SituationDecember 2001

I said this past Shabbos that we do not find in Chumash any direct dialogue between Avraham and Yitzchak after Yitzchak got married nor do we find any dialogue between Yitzchak and Yakov after Yakov got married. I suggested that this absence of father-son communication following the son's marriage is perhaps hinting to us that once a child gets married it is time for the parents to "butt out" – the time for raising the child has passed. The time for solving the child's problems has passed. It is time for the child to move on with his or her own life and to -- with his or her new life partner -- begin to find their own formula for confronting life's challenges and opportunities. In short it is time to invoke the universal law of "Al Ken Ya'azov Ish es aviv v'es Imo; v'Davak b'ishto… ".

Perhaps people were being polite, but no one asked me a very basic question which seems to pull the rug out from my entire thesis. Namely, since when is it true that the Avos did not communicate with their children after their children got married? What about Yakov with his children? Clearly there is ongoing dialogue between Yakov and his children in each of the last four Parshiyos of Sefer Bereshis: Vayeshev, Miketz, VaYigash, and VaYechi each have very direct and very personal conversation between Yakov and his grown children up to and including the very direct and sometimes very blunt death bed directives to each of his sons.

But I thought of this question before I delivered my speech last Shabbos and I have an answer. The answer is in fact in a Rashi in this week's Parsha! And it is in fact a Rashi which is very appropriate to quote on Alex's Sheva Brochos. We find [37:34-35] "Vayikra Yakov simlosav vayasem sak b'mosnav vaYisabel yamim Rabim. VaYakumu kol banav v'chol benosav l'nachmo; va'yema-en l'hisnachem…" (And Yakov tore his clothing and he wore sackcloth, and he

mourned for his son many days. And all of his sons and daughters arose to try and comfort him, but he refused to be comforted). This is a very dramatic set of verses and we can get lost in the emotion of the pathos here. But Rashi calls our attention to a very striking pair of words in this passage. "Excuse me, but did you say "v'chol benosav"? (all his daughters). Since when did Yakov have daughters (plural)? Rashi answers by quoting the opinion of Rabbi Yehudah in the Medrash who says "Achayos te'umos noldu im kal shevet, v'shevet – v'nasum" (twin sisters were born with each of the 12 tribes and they married them).

Now Alex is certainly well aware of the great bracha and zechus it is to have been born with a twin sister. Certainly such a special twin sister as he has. But according to Rav Yehudah – the Shevatim had an even greater need for twin sisters than did Alex. For as we see with our own eyes, Alex Baruch Hashem managed to find a wonderful shidduch from outside his family. But who would the Shevatim have married, especially after both Yitzchak and Avraham were so insistent that their children not marry from the local population. Who then could they marry – if not their own sisters?

The commentaries explain by the way – that according to Rabbi Yehuda the Shevatim did not marry their own twin sisters because even a Ben Noach is forbidden to marry a maternal sister. Rather they married a half-sister from another mother. In other words Leah's 6 sons married the twin sisters that were born with the sons of Rachel, Bilha, and Zilpa and the 6 sons of Rachel, Bilha, and Zilpa married the 6 twin sisters that were born with each of Leah's sons. In this way they were each marrying only an Achos min ha'Av – a paternal half-sister, which is permitted to a Noachide.

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I just want to point out that the Ramba"n avoids the textual problem in the verse I quoted before by saying that "all his daughters" includes both daughters and grand-daughters and it would then refer to Dina the daughter and to Sarach Bas Asher, the grand-daughter. But besides the textual problem of this Pasuk which Ramba"n gets out of – there is the practical problem – who in fact did the sons of Yakov marry? And the Ramba"n in fact in the Parsha of Tamar does wind up quoting the same Medrash that Rashi brings on the pasuk of "v'chol Benosav".

So what do we gain from Rabbi Yehuda's opinion? It now comes out very well why Yakov could still continue a dialogue – could still give mussar and advice and order around his children – even after they got married! (Ayn Hachi Nami) It is certainly true that when your children marry 'outsiders' – who grew up in their own family with their own set of quirks and their own set of Mishugasin then the best policy is to let the young couple form their own family unit, come to their own meeting of the minds in terms of how to proceed with life – and to let the older generation stand by the sidelines and wait to see how the kids will turn out when they "grow up".

By Yakov, however, we had a unique situation – the sons were his sons and the daughters were his daughters! They all had his idiosyncrasies. There were no new quirks and Mishugasin of "in-laws" to deal with! Therefore Yakov could feel comfortable to give orders and mussar and advice to his children – even after their marriage – all the way to his death bed.

I just would like to close by tying in these thoughts from the Parsha with a related thought from the Sheva Brochos. We will shortly recite the beautiful blessing which begins with the words "Sameach Te'Samach reyim ha'Ahuvim k'Samechacha yetzeercha b'Gan Eden …" [Gladden the beloved companions as you gladdened your creation in the Garden of Eden ] We offer a prayer that the young newlyweds will experience the marital bliss that was experienced by Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden at the very dawn of creation. What was so special about the relationship of Adam and Eve. The world says that the uniqueness of their relationship was that Adam and Eve each knew that they truly had the best spouse in the world. There was no potential of rivalries or of jealousies, there were no "old-flames" – no former boyfriends or former girlfriends. Truly – Gan Eden.

That's what the world says. I want to suggest that the number one cause of problems in marriage (present company excluded, of course) – especially among newlyweds is not the problem of competition for affection or attention from rivals or "old flames". The number one cause of problems in marriage is "in-laws". It is the older generation trying to suggest – gently or otherwise – to their newly married son or daughter how they should conduct themselves in their new home, and perhaps more commonly and more troublesome – how their new son-in-law or daughter-in-law should conduct themselves in their new home.

That was the uniqueness of the Simcha of Adam and Chava – they had no in-laws. There were no parents looking over their shoulders telling them what to do. My Bracha to my own children and to all newlyweds is that they should know the Simcha that Adam and Chava knew in the Garden of Eden – they should never be troubled by intrusive parents or intrusive in-laws. They should be able to grow together – to explore and to learn together what it takes to make a successful marriage and they should be, with G-d's Help successful in that quest.

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Bayis Ne'eman B'YisraelDecember 2001

When we think and speak of "Sheva Brochos", we are of course referring technically to the 7 specific blessings recited under the wedding canopy and during the meals at which a Minyan participates together with the Bride and Groom during the "Seven Days of Festivity" (Shivas Yemei HaMishteh) following the wedding. In truth the majority of these blessings do not uniquely relate to the wedding Simcha. When you strip away the generic, background, and preparatory blessings, so to speak, you are really left with only 2 blessings out of the seven that are specifically focused on the bride and the groom. You have the blessing which ends MeSameach Chosson V'Kallah and the immediately following blessing which ends MeSameach Chosson im haKallah.

There is however, at least colloquially, another blessing that comes to mind relating to the Groom and the Bride which is not included in the text of the official 7 Blessings recited as part of Sheva Brochos. That is the commonly expressed sentiment where family and friends bless the young couple "Yehi Ratzon SheTivnu Bayis Ne'eman B'Yisrael" (May it be G-d's Will that you build a faithful household in Israel).

The term Bayis Ne'eman – literally a faithful house – is very rich with meaning and nuance. And on this very meaningful occasion of Alex and Chani's last Sheva Brochos, I would like to express my own Bracha of Thanksgiving to G-d that we have the Zechus to celebrate this occasion in this particular Bayis Ne'eman of my mother, Alex's Grandmother.

This house has in fact been the faithful address for many Simchas in our family. We had Moshe and Alex's Shalom Zachors in this house; We had Moshe's Pidyon HaBen here; We had my daughters Bat Mitzvah receptions. There were many Yom Tov meals; there were memorable Sedorim and Succhos meals here; there were Thanksgiving Dinners and Fourth of July barbecues. Many family birthdays were celebrated here. Alex used to bring his birthday parties over to watch sports events on the Cable Television. Whenever Tzippy and I would not be at our house when the kids came home from school – this Bayis Ne'eman would be the "drop-off" address for our children. And it was always hard to get Alex and the rest of my children to leave.

And so, I take this opportunity to express my sincerest appreciation to my mother, for all she has done for Tzippy and myself and for all of our children over the years. May she have many more years of health and happiness in this Bayis Ne'eman and may she continue to see nachas from her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. I am especially appreciative for her energetic and enthusiastic volunteering to host this final Sheva Brochos for our Seattle family and long-time family friends which gives them the opportunity to participate in our Simcha and to meet and to wish their own personal Bracha and Mazal Tov and to be meSameach Chassan v'Kallah.

I would for just a few moments, like to say a short Dvar Torah, not on the subject of Chassan v'Kallah (the Groom AND the bride), but on the subject of Chassan Im HaKallah (the Groom WITH the bride), namely the appropriate interaction between newlyweds.

In this week's parsha, when Yakov sends back his sons including Binyamin to negotiate for food and for the release of Shimeon with the mysterious viceroy of Egypt he tells them "V'Kel Shakai yiten lachem Rachamim…." (May G-d Almighty give you mercy) . One would have expected that it would be more appropriate for Yakov to pray "May G-d

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Almighty be merciful to you". What is the meaning of this expression "May He give you mercy"?

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski writes that Jacob's words were more than a prayer They were a lesson as well. What he told his children was that if they wished to elicit mercy from the Egyptian ruler who had been so stern with them, they must first be compassionate themselves. If they relate to other people with a lack of sensitivity, then they should not expect anyone to be considerate of them.

Jacob's prayer, therefore was, "May G-d Almighty grant that you be merciful (yiten lachem rachamim), for then you can hope to receive mercy as well from others."

Alex and Chani, I've already pledged that I'm not got to mix in and tell you how to run your lives, but that doesn't preclude me from sharing Divrei Torah with you every now and then. I feel this lesson of "Yiten Lachem Reachamim" is a very important one for newlyweds and indeed for all married couples to always remember. We can, to a significant measure, influence how our spouses react to us, by developing those character traits in our behavior towards them that we would wish them to manifest toward us. Character traits of respect, of empathy, of sensitivity for feelings, and of love.

May you always manifest all these character traits towards each other, may you build on the examples you have seen in your parents and in your grandparents homes and may you too build your own Bayis Ne'eman B'Yisrael.

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Pidyon Haben of Yehudah Shlomo TwerskyNovember 11, 2002

The last time I spoke publicly was when I was given the honor of making the communal Siyum Mishnayos at the conclusion of the Shloshim for Ari Grashin, z"l, a little over two week ago. On that occasion, I read the last Mishneh in Uktzin in which Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi expounds on the verse in Mishlei "אלמא םהיתרצאו שי יבהא ליחנהל".

Of course, Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi teaches that the word "שי" in the expression "to cause those who I love to inherit שי" is really a code and it represents its numeric value of 310. He teaches that in the future G-d will grant every Tzadik 310 worlds.

Today, Baruch Hashem, we have the opportunity to speak at the conclusion of a different kind of Shloshim. We have completed, with G-d's help, the 30 day period in which the new born child leaves the category of doubtful viability, and we have arrived at the relatively rare Simcha and Mitzvah of Pidyon HaBen..

I again today wish to quote the expression from Mishlei שי יבהא ליחנהל and to again interpret the word שי as a code – but not a Gematria code, but rather a "Roshei Teivos" code, an acronym. The word שי consisting of the letters yud and shin, stands for Yehudah Shlomo, my first male grandson to carry the Twersky name. The letters yud and shin not only represent the "Roshei Teivos" of the two names of my new grandson but they also represent the "Roshei Teivos" of the two names of the place where we are zoche to be celebrating this Simcha. Chazal tell us that originally this city was named Shalem, as we find in Parshas Lech Lecha in reference to Malki Tzedek Melech Shalem. Later in Parshas Vayera, it was given the added name Hashem Yireh, and was thus subsequently known by both names Yireh and Shalem, or YeruShalyaim. I feel very blessed and very fortunate to be present at this Simcha involving Yehudah Shlomo in Yeru-Shalayim and while not considering myself deserving, I feel that I have been a recipient in a sense of the Bracha of "Yesh" – Yud Shin, from HaKadosh Baruch Hu, on this trip.

In a sense you could say that this experience is for me a surprise b'geder "Yesh m'Ayin". Until just a couple of weeks ago I did not really expect to be here for the Pidyon HaBen. But then I remembered a couple of teachings of Hillel which helped bring me here. The first teaching I remembered was "Im lo achshav – Eimasai". (If not now when). There are unfortunately no shortage of excuses for not visiting Eretz Yisrael these days. Here I was presented with an opportunity to attend a grandson's Pidyon HaBen in Eretz Yisrael. Needless to say this is an "excuse to come" which may never be duplicated and if I would not take advantage of this excuse, then in fact when would I ever come? Im lo achshav eimasai.

The second teaching of Hillel which brought me here comes from the very same Mishneh in Avos: K'she-ani l'atzmi mah ani. When I am by myself what good am I? I knew that my dear wife Tzippy was determined to come to visit her new grandson, regardless of what I decided. Tzippy and I are completing this month a "Shloshim" of our own – 30 years since we first met. And so the thought of having to spend two weeks in Seattle k'she-ani l'atzmi, without my wife also was part of the "Yesh m'Ayin" calculation which brought me here.

I e-mailed a few thoughts to my children recently on the concept of bnei banim, harei hem k'banim -- the fact that sometimes grandchildren are considered like children. There is an inverse concept to the principle of bnei banim, harei hem k'banim and that is the concept that avi avos harei hem k'avos – a father's father is also considered like a father. In fact we have two examples of just this principle in this weeks parsha of Vayetzei.

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In the dramatic dream of the ladder, G-d introduces himself to Yakov with the words "Ani HaShem, Elokai Avraham Avicha, v'Elokai Yitzchak…" (I am the L-rd, the G-d of your father Avraham, and the G-d of Yitzchak). In this verse, Avraham is called the father of Yakov, and Yitzchak is just called Yitzchak. Again later on in the Parsha, when Yakov meets the shepherds from Charan he asks them "Do you know Lavan son of Nachor?" -- even though it was Besuel who was Lavan's father, and Nachor was his grandfather.

These two verses from this week's parsha are very difficult. They seem to either ignore or downplay the father–son relationship and emphasize the grandfather-grandson relationship in its place. What is going on here?

I think that this can be partially understood in light of an insight provided by the Kli Yakar at the beginning of last week's Parsha. The Kli Yakar contrasts the statement at the beginning of Toldos concerning Avraham's relationship with Yitzchak with that which we find just 7 pesukim earlier concerning Avraham's relationship with Yishmael. In pasuk 19 we find: "V'Eleh Toldos Yitzchak ben Avraham; Avraham Holid es Yitzchak"; while in verse 12 we find "V'Eleh Toldos Yishmael ben Avraham asher Yaldah Hagar HaMitzris Shifchas Sarah L'Avraham". In other words in connection with Yitzchak, Avraham is the subject of two different relationships: The "Ben" relationship and the "Holid" relationship. However in the case of Yishmael, while Avraham is the subject of the "Ben" relationship, it is his mother Hagar who is the subject of the "Holid" relationship.

The Kli Yakar points out that in Hebrew there is a difference between the relationship of "Ben" (child) and the relationship of "Toladah" (having given birth to). The Ben, or the Father-Son relationship, he points out is a term which is applied in a number of cases to non-biological relationships – be it one of teacher-disciple or be it one of adoption. He quotes by way of example: V'yehi lah l'Ben (which it says about Bas Paroah's relationship with Moshe); "VaTehi lo l'Bas" (which it says about Mordechai's relationship with Esther). Likewise Avraham is called "Av Hamon Goyim", and disciples are called "Banim" as in (V'Shinantam l'banecha: elu talmidecha). Holadah, however, refers to the biological parent – child relationship.

The Kli Yakar says that what one picks up from someone in which he has the "Av-Ben" relationship is "B'Mikreh", but what one picks up genetically from someone who has been "Moleed" him is "B'Eztzem". I guess in modern terminology this dichotomy of "B'Etzem" vs "B'Mikreh" would be called "Nature" vs "Nurture". Modern day sociologists have spent a lot of time and research trying to study the relative weight and significance on the development of a child between nature and nurture. For his part, the Kli Yakar argues that "B'Etzem" (nature) is more crucial in the development of the child. "B'Mikreh" (nurture) means that the child was influenced by this person – be it a teacher or parent or adopted parent. But that influence can easily become undone if the child leaves the "parent's" environment and seeks out other influences in other environments. It is much harder to change one's nature – his gut instincts, which he gets from the biological parent. That is why although Avraham had some influence on Yishmael and he is called Yishmael ben Avraham, ultimately the influence was not the over-riding factor in Yishmael's development because his biological and emotional instincts he got from Hagar the Egyptian – as it says "asher Yaldah Hagar haMitzris". Yitzchak, on the other hand received both "B'Mikreh" and "B'Etzem" the influence and the instincts of Avrohom. So by Yitzchak it is not only Yitzchak ben Avraham, but also Avrohom Holeed es Yitzchak.

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I know that Yehudah Shlomo has been brought into this world by a wonderful set of Moleedim. Alex and Chani each have wonderful midos and kochos in their own right. Together they make a wonderful set of parents who have implanted in their son "b'etzem" beautiful instincts and beautiful genetic potential. They too, G-d willing, will be wonderful teachers and have the ability and the zechus to be mekayem through their own children and through the children of others who they will have the opportunity to influence "V'sheenantam l'banecha – elu Talmidecha".

But here, in the area of influence at least b'Geder "Mikreh", if not directly b'geder "Etzem" there is room for Grandparents as well. And the potential influence of grandparents can in fact be major factors in the lives of grandchildren. I must admit quite frankly, that my expectation of having an opportunity to even b'mikreh have much influence over grandchildren that live 10,000 miles away is not that great. Nevertheless, we have many times witnessed as a people and as individuals pleasant surprises from HaKadosh Baruch Hu – b'Geder Yesh M'Ayin – Brochos of "Yesh" where our expectation was "Ayin".

I hope and pray that just as Hashem has granted me and my wife the Bracha of Yesh to be in Yerushalayim and attend the Pidyon HaBen of Yehudah Sholomo, so too He will grant us the opportunity to return again – perhaps on a longer or more permanent basis, to get to visit our children and to get to know our grandchildren and to become an influence in their lives.

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Acting Rabbi-

Speeches I Gave During

Rabbi Kletenik's Sabbatical

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Help From Heaven When The Bread Basket Is EmptySuccos 2000 Congregation BCMH

A couple of months ago I got a phone call from Rabbi Kletenik who told me he was trying to divide up his various responsibilities to make sure the community had adequate coverage while he would be out of town on his Sabbatical. He asked me if I would teach the Daf Yomi every day. I counter offered that I would be glad instead to be the rabbinic stand-in for him in the Purim video this year. He came back and suggested that I give the daily classes after Shachris and Mincha. I counter offered that I would record the weekly messages on the Eruv line. After going back and forth several times, we finally compromised that I would speak from the pulpit once a month. So here I am.

The truth of the matter is, as many of you may remember, this is not the first time I am speaking from the BCMH pulpit. This is not even the first time I am speaking from this pulpit on the first day of Succos. Exactly seven years ago today and several other times in the 1993-1994 time frame when this congregation was without rabbinic leadership, I found myself exactly where I am standing at this moment.

Although 7 years ago I delivered sermons when the Congregation was without a Rabbi and today I am delivering sermons when we are without a Rabbi – I personally sense a fundamental difference between the two experiences which I would like to share with you this morning.

The difference I feel can best be expressed by a very famous Talmudic idiom: Aino Domeh mi she'yesh lo Pas b'Salo – l'mi Sh'ein bo pas beSaloh. Literally "there is no comparison between a person who has bread in his basket and a person whose bread basket is empty". The Mishneh in the 6th perek of Yoma describes the process whereby on Yom Kippur the Ish Iti, the designated representative of the Kohen Gadol would accompany the Sair L'Azazel – the goat that was to be thrown over the cliff -- from the courtyard of the Temple to the heights overlooking Azazel. The distance to travel was lengthy. According to one opinion 10 mil, according to another opinion 12 mil. Every mil along the way were little booths – Succot, the Mishneh calls them – where the messenger could rest up and regain his strength. In each Succah was prepared food and drink in case the messenger was weak and needed to break his fast. The Gemarah teaches that in the hundreds of years the Yom Kippur Service was carried out, year after year – it never happened that the messenger had to break his fast. If so, they ask, why was it necessary to prepare food and drink in each of these booths – year after year. The Gemarah answers with the principle I quoted before -- : Aino Domeh mi she'yesh lo Pas b'Salo – l'mi Sh'ein bo pas beSaloh.

The very presence of the food, made it easier to fast. Knowing, that if he wanted to eat, he could eat – knowing that in just a fraction of a mil there will be more food and drink available -- allowed him to push on, and not become preoccupied and distraught over the deprivation he was currently suffering. The Talmud applies the same idea elsewhere to overcoming the frustration of temporary sexual deprivation. We find the idea also applied to financial security. The concept is the same throughout – when a person knows that there is a clear end to his current plight – be it physical or emotional – the plight is far more manageable that where there is no end in sight.

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Today we are, Baruch Hashem, a congregation with Pas B'Saleinu. We may not have a Rabbi with us this Yom Tov. We may not have a Rabbi with us for many many Shabbosim over the coming months. But we know we have a Rabbi under contract. We have confidence he will be returning to us. We have Pas B'Saleinu. We will, I"YH be able to manage for these next few months.

It was not thus when I spoke here on Succoth 7 years ago. I remember well the feedback we received from our "Job Announcement" written in May 1993. The 24 person Search Committee, representing every precinct of special interest within this diverse congregation came up with a 2 page wish list describing a Superman. I was told by leading personalities from the OU and from a variety of well-known Yeshivas that the person we described did not exist. And if he did exist, he would never come to Seattle. We weren't looking for a Yeshiva graduate, we were told, we were looking for an immigrant from Krypton.

I remember well the despair I had at ever finding suitable candidates. I remember well the despair of trying to envision the committee and ultimately the congregation ever agreeing on who was a suitable candidate. And I remember well the despair I felt at having to speak to the Congregation on Succos and Shemini Atzeres and other times that year – wondering if we would ever again have the Pas B'Saleinu of respected and distinguished Rabbinical leadership in this Congregation.

What I learned from that experience is that one must set high goals – always trying to reach for the stars, spiritually speaking. Don't become depressed by the nay-sayers. Take it with a grain of salt when they tell you "What you are asking for does not exist" Resist the temptation to "be realistic" and to quickly settle for mediocrity when deep down you know that mediocrity will not do the job.

I reread our Job Announcement 7 ½ years later and realize that we were given tremendous Siyata D'Shmaya. In bullet after bullet, we have hit the bulls-eye with our Rabbi who is now on his well-deserved Sabbatical. I mention all of the above, by way of introduction to the following short thought I wish to share with you this morning…

Succos is a holiday when we literally reach for the stars, spiritually speaking. We commemorate and try to recreate the atmosphere of the Jewish people living under the protection of the Ananei HaKavod, the Clouds of Glory. Those were the days of "Ha-Machilcha man BaMidbar l'maan anosecha" the days when we were fed manna in order that we feel suffering. The Gemarah in Yoma asks the obvious question – what kind of suffering was there in the eating of Manna? One of the answers given was the very idea I mentioned earlier – it was an eating without having Pas B'Salo – there was no more bread left in the cupboard. How could you enjoy the manna – knowing that it was always the last morsel of food that stood between you and starvation in the wilderness. Such eating would inevitably be traumatic and full of suffering – unless one had Emunah in G-d that indeed He would provide for our needs -- and there would be another Heavenly shipment of mannah arriving the next morning… as indeed there was day after day, 6 days a week, week after week, for forty years.

This is the idea we are trying to recapture, at least symbolically, by moving out of our comfortable homes and out from underneath our sturdy roofs. Minus the carpeting, minus the chandeliers, minus the textured ceilings – one gazes up through the greenery and sees the same stars and the same Heaven that were viewed by our ancestors 4000 years ago. From that Heaven our ancestors received all of their needs and from this same Heaven – directly or indirectly -- we too receive all our needs.

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Our goal on Succos is to make that association. To integrate that high level of trust in G-d into our world outlook. This is a very lofty goal. Like all lofty goals, there is no way it can be achieved without great Siyata D'Ishmaya, help from Heaven.

When one sets goals which require great Siyata D'Ishmaya -- there will always be voices of nay-sayers. telling you to settle for less: Less Emunah, less Bitachon, less Faith in G-d. There will always be voices that say such help from Heaven does not exist and if it does exist – it won't be coming to you. Sometimes these are voices of friends or relatives; sometimes the voices we hear is the struggle of conscience that exists within our own mind – for the integrity of our very soul.

At no time of the year do we have the potential to victoriously confront these voices advocating spiritual mediocrity as we do within one week of Yom Kippur. In no place on our property do we have the potential to rendezvous with the spiritual strengths of our Manna-eating ancestors as we do in that frail little structure that sits on our porch or in our back yard.

Succah is a beautiful Mitzvah. It is the classic Mitzvah of "Pas B'Salo". The house is right there. We can certainly move back home next week. If it rains or gets too cold we can even head back there right now. All it takes is a little Mesiras Nefesh and a little imagination to reach up through the Schach and hit the spiritual bulls-eye we are striving for. May we all set for ourselves high Spiritual goals and may we all be granted the Siyata D'Ishmaya to reach those goals.

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Lech Lecha: And He Called In The Name of HashemNovember. 11, 2000 Congregation BCMH

In the late fall of 1972, I was in the Semicha program at Yeshiva University, sitting in the class-room of Rabbi Walter Wurtzburger. Rabbi Wurtzburger gave his students a vivid illustration of the great power and prerogative a Rabbi possesses when he steps up to the pulpit on Shabbos morning.

He put it as follows: Gentlemen, take any parsha between the end of the Democratic and Republican conventions and the election. I could give you an erudite and eloquent Sermon based on the Parsha of the week that would convince you that Daas Torah (Torah Philosophy) requires you to vote for George McGovern. I could give you a second equally erudite and eloquent Sermon based on the Parsha of the week that would convince you that Daas Torah requires you to vote for Richard Nixon. And I could give you a third erudite and eloquent Sermon based on the Parsha of the week that would convince you that Daas Torah requires you to not vote at all when confronted with a choice between George McGovern and Richard Nixon.

I personally would never be so presumptuous as to use a pulpit to campaign or lobby for the election of one candidate or another based on my supposed understanding of how Daas Torah applies itself to the particular issues or personalities at hand. But that having been said, now that this historic campaign and election are now over (if not decided), I feel it is not inappropriate to make a passing reference to the candidacy and the campaign of Joseph Lieberman, a Torah observant Jew, in connection with this week's Parsha.

As many of you know, Lech Lecha is my Bar Mitzvah Parsha. I am reading it now publicly for 40 years. Given all the times I've practiced the leining, I would estimate that I have read the verses of this Parsha well over 1,000 times in my life. Yet there is one unique phrase – which actually appears twice in the Parsha – which struck me this year as if I were reading it for the first time.

In describing at the beginning of the Parsha, Avram's arrival in the Land of Canaan, we are told that he pitched his tent, he built an altar to G-d. and then the Torah tells us "VaYikra b'Shem Hashem". Now normally we find the verb "Vayikra" (and he called) followed by the preposition "El" [As in Vayika el Moshe or Vayira el Hashem] or we find it followed by the preposition "L" [As in Vayira Lo or Vayikra Lah] , meaning that someone called to someone else. But for 40 years when I came to this phrase "VaYikra b'Shem Hashem", I did not think about the uniqueness of the construct, I thought to myself nothing more than the cantillation notes "Tipcha, Mercha, Sof Pasuk" and went on to the next verse.

This year, when I came to the expression "VaYikra b'Shem Hashem", I thought of a question that Lawrence Spivak asked Menachem Begin on Meet the Press some 22 years ago. A somewhat frustrated NBC interviewer said, "Mr. Begin, whenever you answer a question you keep saying 'if G-d wills it we will come to this agreement with the Egyptians; if G-d wills it we will come to that agreement with the Arabs' – could you please clarify for us what you mean by 'if G-d wills it' – is that a prayer or a pre-condition of the negotiations?"

This Safek or doubt that Lawrence Spivak had as to the intent of Menachem Begin actually happens to coincide with a Machlokes between Rashi and the Ramba"n as to the interpretation of the expression "Vayikra B'Shem Hashem" in this week's parsha.

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Rashi following Unkelos interprets it to refer to Prayer. The Ramba"n and many other commentaries, following the Medrash interpret it differently. They interpret it to mean that "Avrahm invoked the name of G-d in his dealings with his fellow man and he endeared the concept of G-d to his fellow man. As Bereshis Rabbah expresses it "melamed sh'hikra shmo shel HaKadosh Baruch Hu b'pi kol Beryah" Avram gently and non-threateningly introduced the concept of G-d and a Higher Moral law into the vocabularies and ultimately into the value system of a population that knew no such concept. This is the identity of "HaNefesh Asher asu v'Charan" -- all the souls that Avram and his wife Sarai had gathered around them in Charan.

Forget about Tax Plans, forget about how to spend the surplus, forget about School Vouchers, forget about Medicare revisions, if there is one thing which the proud descendant of Avraham,Avinu, Joseph Lieberman, brought to the Presidential Political process this year it is the idea of VaYikra B'Shem Hashem – the introduction of the concept– especially to people who might find the idea foreign and at first perhaps even offensive – of invoking the Name of G-d and of a Higher Moral Authority Who impacts all aspects of human endeavor.

I would like to read a quote from a CNN interview with Senator Lieberman just one week before the election. Larry King asked him to describe his schedule during the hectic closing days of the closest Presidential race in history: He replied, "I'm in Florida tonight. I'll be here tomorrow. I'm then going to Little Rock, (and then) on to St. Louis. We are going to be in St. Louis Thursday. Then up into the upper Midwest, in Wisconsin. And then to Pittsburgh Friday morning, back to Florida Friday afternoon. And thank G-d, no pun intended, then comes Sabbath, and we rest.

Here you have it, gentle, with good humor but nevertheless enlightening and inspiring -- testifying to the fundamental Sign of our faith (to the Os hi l'olmei Ad) that the world has a Creator who worked for six days and rested on the Seventh.

I believe that Senator Lieberman was not just teaching a subtle lesson to Larry King, he was teaching a lesson to all of us. Maybe some of us, Baruch Hashem, don’t need the lesson of Sabbath Observance – but I dare say that we could all use a lesson in what in means to be “Koreh B’Shem Hashem”, as the Medrash understands the term. One does not need to be an Avraham Avinu, or a Prime Minister of Israel, or a US Senator or Vice-Presidential candidate to have the opportunity and the challenge to invoke verbally as well as non-verbally the Name of Hashem in all our conversations and in all our actions – particularly as the relate to our interactions with non-Jewish and non-religious members of society. I am not talking lip-Service, I am talking real Avodas HaLev – service of the Heart, which impacts our lips as well as every other limb of our body. Avraham set the standard for Invoking the Name of HaShem in a way which leads to Kiddush Hashem – the Sanctification of G-d’s Name. Happy are those who follow in his footsteps.

I would just like to close by using for a few moments the power and prerogative of being at the pulpit to comment briefly on the occasion for which my mother is sponsoring a Kiddush for the shul this morning.

I attended last Shabbos the Bris of my first grandson in Passaic, NJ. I know Eva and Eli Genauer were recently back East for the Bris of their first grandson and they brought back pictures. My grandson’s bris was on Shabbos so I don’t have any pictures to show. It didn’t classify as a “Kodak Moment”, but I certainly consider it as a “Kodesh Moment”. The word Kodesh in its simplest connotation means separate and set apart as the Toras Kohanim interprets Kedoshim Teeheyu – Perushim Teeheyu: You should be a separate and set apart

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nation. Besides being a Kodesh moment because it was my first grandson, it was also very much a Kodesh moment, because the baby was named, Yitzchak Mayer, after my father of Blessed Memory who was president of this congregation for a number of years and a respected communal leader here in Seattle for a number of decades.

I dare say, that in the first 40 years of my life I heard my father’s name mentioned thousands of times, and like so many other things in life, I took it for granted, never giving it a second thought. It was towards the end of his life and beyond that I came to appreciate how meaningful and appropriate a name it was. The name Yitzchak (from the word tzachak laughter) and the name Mayer (from the word Meir – one who gives light) really captured his essence. He was just as a described before – a man with a gentle, good humored nature, who was nevertheless always enlightening and inspiring.

This is not surprising. The Gemara in Brochos tells us that Shma Garim – a person’s name has an impact on his fate and destiny. This is true both in terms of a name’s etymology and it is true in terms of living up to the character traits of a person you are named after.

It remains to be seen whether Yosef Lieberman will live up to his namesake and rise to a position of Mishneh L’Melech, second in command of the most powerful nation on earth. I will not use the prerogative of the pulpit to tell you that based on Daas Torah, I think this is what should or should not happen. I will use, however, the prerogative of a son and a grandfather to say that I hope and pray that Yitzchak Mayer Luchins will in fact live up to his namesake and grow up to be a well-loved individual who will be Koreh B’Shem Hashem and who will, through gentle humor, spread enlightenment and Kiddush Hashem in all his endeavors.

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Vayigash: "Note"-Worthy Comments by Ben Azai and the Vilna GaonJanuary 2001

Ben Azai teaches: "Al tehee baz le'chol adam; v'al tehee maflig lechol davar; she-ayn lecha Adam sh'ayn lo Sha-ah, v'ayn lecha davar she-ayn lo makom". (Do not be scornful of any person and do not be disdainful of any thing, for you have no person without his hour and you have no thing without its place). "Es Chatai, ani mazkir hayom". I must recall today a sin which I committed in the past. When I last spoke from this pulpit, I disregarded Ben Azai's teaching from Pirkei Avos.

On that occasion, I disdainfully spoke about the cantillation notes. I said that for the past 40 years which I have been leyning Lech-Lecha the only thing that I thought about when I read the words Vayikra Avram b'Shem Hashem was the trop of tipcha – mercha – sof Pasuk. I made this remark as if, chas v'sholom, the traditional notes of cantillation were nothing more than a nursery rhyme tune.

Nothing could be further from the truth. The Talmud in Megillah teaches that the Piskei Ta'amim, the musical notes, are part of a tradition going back to Sinai and are critical in understanding the words of Torah.

To atone for the disdain I may have shown towards the trop in my last drasha, I take this opportunity to share with you a brilliant analysis of the trop found on the words of the first pasuk of this week's parsha expounded by the Vilna Gaon. The Gaon shows us that not only is the trop crucial for knowing how to properly read and punctuate a verse of Chumash (which is probably the simple meaning of the Gemarah in Megillah), but even the traditional names of the notes can provide amazing insight.

The Vilna Gaon points out that the trop for the words Vayigash eilav Yehudah vayomer be adonee is 'kadma v'azlah rve'ee, zarka munach segol'. We'll come back to this in a moment.

If you'll recall last week's Sedra, Yakov was hesitant to send Binyamin to Egypt. He rejected Reuvain's offer to kill his own two sons if he failed to return Binyamin safely. But ultimately Yehudah made him an offer which he did not refuse: "Anochi e-ervenu, m'yadee tevakshenu im lo havio-siv eilecha, v'hetzagtiv l'fanecha, v'chatasi lecha kol hayamim" (I will personally guarantee him; from my own hand you can demand him. If I do not bring him back to you and stand him before you, then I will have sinned to you for all time). Rashi says "V'Chatasi lecha kol HaYamim" means "L'Olam HaBah" In other words Yehudah was willing to put on the line his Eternal Share in the World to Come, as a guarantee that Benjamin would return safely to his father.

Now let's go back to the trop. The Vilna Gaon interprets the notes appearing on the words at the beginning of this week's portion as follows: kadma v'azlah rvee'ee means (in Aramaic) the fourth one (i.e. – Yehudah who was the fourth son of Jacob) got up and went. Why was it the fourth son, and not Reuven, the eldest brother, who made this plea? Because zarka munach segol which means (again in Aramaic) thatYehudah had thrown away (zarka from the word zarak) his Eternal Rest (munach from the word Menucha) with the treasured nation (Segol from the same root as Segulah). In other words since Yehudah had placed in jeopardy his portion of Eternal Rest in the World To Come he had supreme motivation to take whatever action necessary to ensure that Benjamin would be safely returned to his father.

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So indeed I apologize for being disparaging about the meaning contained even in the cantillation notes and will try in the future to better keep in mind Ben Azai's advice of v'al tehee maflig lechol davar of not being disparaging of any thing.

But far more spiritually detrimental than neglecting to heed Ben Azai's second statement in the Mishneh is the far wider tendency amongst us to neglect his first statement. Al tehee baz le'chol adam: Do not be scornful of any person.

To again paraphrase the Sar HaMashkim, Es Chata-eynu ani Mazkir Hayom. Our collective sin I must make mention of today. There is an insidious tendency in society at large which carries over into Jewish society and even into "frum Jewish society" to be scornful of people in violation of Ben Azai's dictates. We are scornful of people we disagree with and we are even scornful of people we basically agree with if they are ever exposed to have weaknesses or have made mistakes – as if we have no weaknesses and never make any mistakes of our own.

There is no doubt that in falling prey to this vicious trait of rushing to heap scorn on people, we are influenced by the practices of a biased print media whose mission is to expose, to sensationalize, to generate controversy and to sell newspapers. Virtually all media is biased, its just that some of the media shares our own bias and some of the media is biased against us. I used to have a teacher who said that both Pravda and Voice of America constantly spew out propaganda. It's just that from our perspective Voice of America is "Propa-Ganda" and Pravda is "Impropa-Ganda".

We are living in a world – both the general world and the Jewish world – which is so polarized and so politicized that it is a matter of course that spokesmen of a particular point of view will not only take issue with their opponents, they will seek to totally de-legitimize and even demonize their opponents.

Look at the words written and spoken about Bill Clinton or Al Gore by Republican journalists and columnists; look at the words spoken about George Bush by Democratic journalists and columnists. Obviously there is room for criticism, there are short-comings and mistakes which exist on both sides of the political spectrum. But the rush to heap only scorn and (to use the Mishnaic term) 'Buz' on one's opponents, in total disregard of their finer qualities, talents, and accomplishments is nothing less than a spiritually degrading exercise for all of society.

What is true in the American society and press viz a viz our politicians is worse by at least an order of magnitude in Israeli society which unfortunately has seen already bullets and not just buz directed at its leaders. We on the right may not agree with the policies of Rabin, Peres, and Barak. These policies may anger and frustrate us, but it is morally wrong to speak (or even to think) of individuals who have devoted their entire lives to the Jewish people and who in their careers accomplished, often with tremendous personal Mesiras Nefesh, great things for the State of Israel as if they were villains and traitors. Of course the same criticism can be made about the writings and remarks of the left viz a viz Sharon and Netanyahu. Unbalanced scorn and buz is unbalanced scorn and buz whether it comes in the form of Propa-ganda or Impropa-ganda.

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On a more painful note and one which strikes closer to home, I believe our community is plagued by this same phenomenon when confronted (lo aleinu) by scandals – be they sins of commission or omission -- involving presumed leaders, movers and shakers, of our own Orthodox community. Of course we are rightly outraged and embarrassed by inappropriate behavior, by breach of trust, by witting or unwitting Chillul HaShem when it occurs and unfortunately it does occur.

But, we must never lose sight of the wisdom which Beruryah pointed out to her husband, Rabbi Meir who had been praying for the death of certain wicked individuals [Brochos 10a]. She told him that the verse in Tehillm reads Yetamu Chataim min Ha'Aretz (May sins be eradicated from the world) rather than Yetamu Chotim min Ha'Aretz (May sinners be eradicated from the world). What we need to pray for is the eradication of sin rather than sinners. If sin alone can be eradicated then perforce Reshaim od eynam – there will no longer be wicked people.

I am thinking in particular about the most unfortunate set of facts released to the public within the last couple of weeks by the OU's Special Commission Investigating Rabbi Baruch Lanner and his affiliation over the past 30 years with NCSY. I certainly recognize that certain actions of his were totally unacceptable and deserving of discipline and termination far earlier than actually happened. But on the other hand, knowing Rabbi Lanner personally – knowing his great talents, his unique charisma, and his many accomplishments both in terms of individual teenagers he inspired as well as what he accomplished for NCSY as a national movement, I am troubled by the tendency of some to demonize him and I am certainly troubled by those who tend to demonize other Rabbis in the OU leadership as well as Kiruv work in general because of guilt by association with Rabbi Lanner and the NCSY.

The Sefer Mussar Avos interprets Ben Azai's teaching: Al tehee baz le'chol adam Don't cast scorn on the entire person based on a particular character flaw. There is no person who does not have redeeming value and one should never totally dismiss him based particular faults. Every person has within himself both heroic and tragic elements. Sometimes discipline is required, some times house cleaning is in order. When this is the case it can and should be done with a minimum of righteous indignation and without heaping personal scorn on the individuals whose human frailties have been exposed.

We in this community are well aware that Rabbis and communal leaders are human. They make mistakes. They are subject to human weaknesses. When such weaknesses are uncovered it is only natural to be angry and upset. It is however no justification for losing perspective, for refusing to acknowledge the good done and the contributions made by these same individuals during the prouder moments of their careers. It is permissible to heap scorn and abuse on the Chataim (the sins). It is impermissible to unleash venomous scorn and hatred against the Chotim themselves. One needs to be much more tolerant, understanding, and forgiving.

Mistakes were made between Yosef and his brothers. The brothers had what to be upset about regarding Yosef and he certainly had what to be upset about regarding them. This weeks Parsha (as well as the accompanying Haftorah) symbolizes the reunification of the Jewish people. Vayigash Elav Yehudah –Judah's drawing near to Yosef foreshadows the end of the cycle of Sinas Chinam between brothers and the reunification of the entire family of Yakov.

May we all tone down the rhetoric against the particular brother or brothers in our nation who have offended us and even continue to offend us by their actions. May we follow the dictates

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of Ben Azai and withhold some of the scorn, trying more to appreciate the 'Sha-ah', the moments and aspects of greatness that exist even in the most offensive of our siblings. Finally may we see the end of Sinas Chinam and the reunification of all the disparate elements of the family of Am Yisroel and may it come speedily in our day.

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B'Shalach: I Have Been Young And Now I Have Grown Older….February 10, 2001

In sitting down to prepare my sermon this week, a discussion that took place about 30 years ago in one my Practical Rabbinics Courses came to mind. Rabbi Joseph Lookstein, z"l, was discussing the popular style of many Rabbis to always base their sermon on an idea in the parsha that can be related to a current event in the news. One of my fellow Semicha students made an interesting observation. He noted that this was indeed the style of his home town Rabbi and he commented that "it wasn't until I was well passed Bar Mitzvah age that I finally figured out what was really going on. I used to be constantly amazed at the workings of the Hashgocha (Divine Providence) – that week in / week out; year in / year out G-d would always make something happen in the world that would directly correlate with the events of the weekly Torah portion." He said that when he finally figured it out, he became a little less impressed with the workings of Divine Providence, but a lot more impressed with the scholarship and oratorical ability of his Rabbi.

I must tell you that, even at my age, I remain most impressed at the workings of the Hashgocha to correlate the dramatic news of the week with the dramatic verses of the Parsha. And if, my counter-part, Rabbi Elisha Paul was given Siyata DishMaya last month when he was able to make a connection between the Burning Bush of Parshas Shmos and the inauguration that same day of the 43rd President of the United States, then I too thank HaKadosh Baruch Hu for providing me also with an obvious connection between this week's historic Israeli election and the words of this morning's Torah reading. We find the following memorable Pasuk in Shiras HaYam: Yemincha HaShem Ne'daree B'Koach; Yemincha HaShem Tir'atz Oyev. [Shmos 15:6] (Your Right hand, Hashem is glorified with strength; Your right hand, Hashem smashes the enemy.) Rashi on this Pasuk makes an interesting observation: Virtually every place in Tanach where a verse metaphorically speaks about hands it will mention both the Right Hand and the Left Hand. There are many such examples: Orech Yamim B'Yemeena, b'smolah osher v'kavod from Mishlei [3:16] Smolo tachas l'roshi, v'Yemeeno tchabkeinee from Shir HaShirim [2:6]; and so forth. In this verse from Az Yashir we find something unique. The right hand is mentioned twice, with no mention of the left hand. Quoting Rashi: Yemincha, Yemincha – shnei peamim (it mentions Your Right Hand twice). K'sheYisroel osin retzono shel Makom – haSemol Na'asis Yemin! (When Israel does the will of G-d, the Left becomes the Right!).

If I may rely a bit on my Chassidic ancestry – I would like to use this Rashi to make a comment about the recent Israeli election. Kshe'Yisroel osin Retzonom L'Makom – When the Israeli electorate make known their attachment to the place which is referred to in Chumash as HaMakom – namely Yerushalayim which is always called "haMakom asher Yivchar HaShem Elokeichem bo l'Shaken Shmo sham" [Devorim 12:11] (the place where Hashem your G-d will choose to rest his Name there); when Israeli voters are called upon to make known their will regarding maintaining exclusive Jewish sovereignty over that Place -- then the left becomes the right and even those who usually vote for the left, wind up voting for the right.

That is the connection between the week's events and the week's Parsha that I suggest somewhat whimsically relying on the liberties of Chassidic exegesis. But I find that the parsha also contains a more profound message that relates to the current situation in Eretz Yisroel. It is primarily this thought I wish to share with you today.

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The opening words of the parsha tell us that it was the plan of the Hashgocha not to allow the Jews to enter Eretz Yisroel by the short and easy route. VaYehi B'Shalach Pharoah Es ha'Am, v'Lo Nacham Elokim Derech Eretz Plishtim, Ki Karov Hu! (And it was when Pharoah sent out the nation, the L-rd did not lead them by way of the Land of the Philistines, because it was near). The route that would bring them to the Promised Land would be precisely the circuitous one. The Jews were not immediately aware of the Divine plan There was not the slightest doubt in their mind that having at last been redeemed from centuries of servitude in Egypt they were now on the quick path to total Redemption… As our parsha begins, the Children of Israel were proceeding with a feeling of total exuberance and confidence. "U'Bnei Yisroel Yotzim b'Yad Ramah". But Geulah (Redemption) is never so simple.

Daber el bnei Yisroel v'Yashuvu v'Yachanu lifnei pi haChiros. Speak to the children of Israel and let them turn back and encamp before pi-HaChiroth. Rashi is explicit here: V'Yashuvu means l'achoreihem – l'Tzad Mitzrayaim (backward; retreating from the progress they already had made, retracing their steps back to Egypt!). The Divine Plan for Geulah was not a straight path, it was by the route that gave both the Jews and their enemies the impression at times that "Nevuchim hem B'Aretz; sagar aleihem haMidbar" – they were lost, they were trapped, they were facing a desperate no-win situation!

When the Jews found themselves apparently trapped by Pharoah's forces on the shores of Yam Suf, they clearly were depressed emotionally and spiritually. They questioned Moses and they questioned G-d: "Were there no graves in Egypt that you took us to die in the Wilderness?" But this was neither the first time nor the last time in Jewish history that someone became disillusioned and began to question and despair upon realizing that the road to Geulah was not as straight forward nor as simple as had initially been expected.

No less a personage that Moshe Rabbeinu himself, had a similar experience not long before. Moshe had initially expected when G-d sent him from Midian to take the people out of Egypt, that they would be given deliverance forthwith. When things took an apparent turn for the worse shortly after his arrival in Egypt he inquired of G-d: Lamah haReioSah l'Am HaZeh; lamah zeh Shelachtani"? (Why have You done evil to this people, why have You sent me?). He was psychologically unprepared for the temporary setback of Pharoah's order to withhold the straw and intensify the servitude. Moshe, too, was initially unaware that G-d has His own calculations. Eventually there will be Geulah and Shirah. Redemption and Song will ultimately surely come; but the time line is of G-d's making, not man's.

The most formative years of my spiritual development were the years I spent in Yeshiva in general and the time I spent learning in a Yeshiva in Israel in particular. This is probably a statement that many people in this room and beyond can make. In my case, however those years were the particularly heady period in modern Jewish history between the Six Day War and the Yom Kippur War. It was definitely a time of "u'Beni Yisroel Yotzim b'Yad Ramah".

During that period of ongoing "Shirah" following the deliverance from a threat far worse than anything we are currently facing – my generation (particularly those educated in Hesder Yeshivot such as Kerem B'Yavneh) felt that we were definitely on the quick path to Geulah Shleimah. Like Moses in the early days of his mission to Egypt; like Bnei Yisroel in those first days after the Exodus, we naively assumed that we were "home free" in terms of Redemption. But as Moshe found out, and as Bnei Yisroel found out, the journey to Geulah is a circuitous one. G-d does not choose to lead his people by the shortest and quickest route to the Promised Land. My generation has found this out as well. Na'ar HaYeesi V'Gam Zakantee. We have been young men and now we are gaining in wisdom as we move on

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through middle age. Our motto has become "vAf al Pee, She'ani Ma'min; Im Kol Zeh Ani Roeh she'hu Misma-meya" Even though we still firmly believe in Moshiach's coming, with all that we see that he is tarrying – longer than we had anticipated.

There is a beautiful Midrash on the passage in Shir HaShirim "Kol Dodi Hinnei zeh bah, medaleg al heHarim, mekabetz al haGevohos. Domeh Dodi l'Tzvi…" (The Voice of my Beloved is coming, He skips over the mountains and leaps over the hills. My Beloved is like a gazelle…). The Medrash compares the Redemption to the running of a gazelle. When the deer runs in mountainous regions, he is visible only when he climbs the mountain; when he descends, he cannot be seen. But even then he is moving forward.

What we have learned over these last 30 years is that we cannot always see the progress of the deer on the road to our Redemption. There are certainly periods when the deer seems to have descended from the heights, and becomes for all intensive purposes invisible to us. The last several months and in some sense the last several years have been such a period. We have been in a mode of Daber el bnei Yisroel v'Yashuvu …. " Speak to the Children of Israel and have them retreat, have them give up territories they have already conquered; have them witness the crumbling of accomplishments they have already taken for granted. But as the Medrash states, even while the deer is descending the others side of the mountain, we have faith that it is still making forward progress, somewhere out of our line of immediate vision.

I recently gave someone a parable. Imagine you set your VCR to record a Seahawk-Raider football game which you cannot watch. The next morning you see the final score in the Seattle Times. Go Seahawks – we won! That night you sit down to watch your recorded tape and you see the Seahawks are getting clobbered throughout the first half. It is mid-way through the fourth quarter, they are still far behind, and the Raiders are still in possession of the ball! Although you are well aware that the Seattle Times is far from infallible, if they recorded a Seahawk victory in the morning's paper you are confident that this is the way the game will end up and you eagerly anticipate the great come from behind victory that you are about to see during the games final minutes.

The Book of Books which is Infallible has told us how the 'game' will end b'Achris HaYamim (in the end of days). We may be getting clobbered at this point, we may not have possession of the ball – but we darn well know how it is going to all turn out.

The gazelle of Geulah may have for a time dropped out of our line of vision. We hope that the change of Prime Ministers this week will be a positive event in the Geulah process. But in truth, about this we can not be sure. But of one thing we can be sure…eventually that gazelle of Geulah will make it to the top of that final mountain. V'Alu Moshiim b'Har Tzion LishPot es Har Eisav. (And the saviours will arise on Mt Zion to judge the mountain of Eisav) v'Haysa L'HaShem haMelucha! (and the Government will belong to Hashem).

Before wishing you all a Good Shabbos and moving on to Mussaf, I just want to make a few brief comments that are in fact closely related to the topic I have discussed this morning. After my last Sermon, my good friend and former classmate Larry Jassen asked that the next time it was my turn to speak, I say a few words about the wonderful work being done by AMIT. Ironically, exactly 22 years ago today – Parshas B'Shalach 1979 I spoke from this pulpit on Shabbos Shirah which was at that time specifically designated nation-wide as the American Mizrachi Women Shabbos where pulpit Rabbis across the country were asked to single out the work of this organization in their Droshos. For some reason, our Rabbi was out of town that week and Tzivia Katsman, of Blessed Memory. asked me to speak. My policy is never to plagiarize – even myself – so I did not repeat that Drosha this morning. Anyone

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who is interested in reading what I said about AMW in 1979 can find that along with my other speeches at members.aol.com/twerskyd/Not_Just_Speeches.

But the truth of the matter is that what was said about AMW in 1979 can be said about AMIT in 2001. The women behind this organization – both locally and nationally – represent the best attributes of Jewish women from Biblical times forward: Miriam and Dvorah who we read about on Shabbas Shirah, the Imahos in Sefer Bereshis, the daughters of Tzelofchad in Sefer Bamidbar, and the Jewish wives and mothers who kept up the spirit of the Jewish males in Egypt and throughout the generations during those periods of history when the gazelle of Geulah fell out of our line of vision. It has traditionally been the Jewish women more than the Jewish men whose love for Eretz Yisroel and whose Faith in G-d's Promise to His people has remained firm and unshaken even in times of setback and distress.

The women of AMIT dedicate their work to provide for the spiritual, social, and professional training needs not just selfishly of their own children or their own communities, but for young Jewish children – immigrants, orphans, children from broken homes -- in Eretz Yisroel half a world a way. Seattle Chapters of Amit recently began their 62nd year of impressive achievements in support of the network of 55 AMIT schools, youth villages, and child havens in Israel which care for over 14,000 children at risk and help turn their lives around.

In the merit of these efforts may G-d help turn the lives around of all of our brethren in Eretz Yirsroel. May we see only forward progress on the road to Geulah so that we may approach the time when together we can all sing the Shirah spoken of in the Haggadah…v'Nodeh lecha Shir Chadash al Geulaseinu v'al pedus nafsheinu (We shall then sing a new song of praise to You for our redemption and for the liberation of our souls). Have a Good Shabbos.

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Bat Mitzvah of Yonah Malka LevinMarch 10, 2001

It gives me great pleasure to have been asked to participate in the Bat Mitzvah Shabbos of Yona Malka Levin. As a native Seattlite, I take special pride in being here to witness this milestone in the life of Arthur and Andrea's family. Arthur first came to Seattle and to BCMH from Anaheim, California as a young single man some 20 years ago. Back then this was "Frontier Land" – to borrow an Anaheim colloquialism. Those were the days before the Kollel, before the NWYHS on Mercer Island; before Discovery Seminars in Bellevue and Renton, before Chabad in Redmond, before Aish HaTorah Speed Dating, before sold-out Youth activities and before waiting lines at the Mikveh. L'Havdil those were the days before Windows, before Amazon.com and before Starbucks. Back then thoughts of Seattle developing into the great crossroads of the cultural and economic world that it has become today or thoughts of Seattle developing into the vibrant place of Jewish activity and Torah learning that exists here today – were strictly thoughts from Fantasy Land. But somehow Arthur liked what he saw. He returned in 1989 with his childhood sweetheart, Andrea, and they decided that Seattle would become their Tomorrow Land. Raising a family bli Ayin Harah of 6 children, can be an Adventure Land and Arthur and Andrea certainly have had their share of Adventures. But we are thrilled that they have chosen to make their home on Morgan Street USA. They have become an integral part of our community. Their dedication to the youth of this congregation, Andrea's service to the Women of the community in the Seattle Mikveh, and their many other volunteer activities in this Shul serve as role models for many who have come after them to build their homes around this community and have experienced the reality of Livnos u'Leheebanos bah – to build here and to be built up oneself here in terms of self development and self-fulfillment, growing and flourishing as individuals and as a family unit, together while helping to build a growing and flourishing community.

The main topic of Parshas Tezaveh is the Bigdei Kehunah, the special priestly garments of those who serve in G-d's Sanctuary. The Torah tells us that these garments are to be "L'Kavod u'LeTiferes" – for honor and for beauty. It just so happens that we find elsewhere in Tanach that Scripture uses the garments of a Kohen Gadol as a metaphor for his children. We read in Trei Asar that the prophet Zecharia had a vision of Yehoshua Kohen Gadol: "V'Yehusha haya lavush Begadim Tzoim" (And Yehoshua was wearing soiled garments). Rashi, Radak, Metzudos, and virtually all the commentaries explain the metaphor of soiled garments as meaning his children were spiritually unworthy. For better of for worse – much like our clothing projects an image of ourselves to the world around us, so do our children. The image presented by a person's dress may be an unfair and inaccurate representation of the true person, but many times that is how the world judges him. So too is the case with one's children. Ideally the garments of those who serve in the House of G-d must be L'Kavod U'L'Tiferes – for glory and for beauty. Arthur and Andrea are Servants of G-d in this Mikdash Me'at, the miniature Sanctuary we call BCMH. Each of their children in general and their first born daughter in particular, are their metaphorical garments and they are truly L'Kavod U'LeTiferes. The Levin children are signs of Honor and Beauty for their parents, for their entire families, and for this community.

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While the main topic of the parsha deals with the Priestly Garments, Tezaveh actually begins with another topic – the requirement to light the Menorah with olive oil which as been pressed rather than crushed. The Torah requires specifically "shemen zayis zach Kasis l'Maor" (pure, pressed olive oil for illumination") This is the finest oil, absolutely pure without any olive particles or sediment mixed in. This oil was made by pressing each olive gently until only one drop of pure oil emerged. Afterwards the olives could be crushed and the remaining oil used for baking the meal offerings. Rashi quotes the source for this law from a Gemara in Tractate Menochos which derives "Kasis l'Maor, v'lo Kasis Le'Mnochos". Literally this means pressed for illumination, but not pressed to be used for flour offerings.

Some commentaries homiletically interpret the word "Menachos" as related to the word "Nachos", meaning to be low. The Talmudic phrase would then mean "crushed to illuminate, but not crushed to be lowly". Many times in life we experience situations or circumstances which are not to our choosing. Every one has their own package of troubles in life and there are many things which happen to us in the course of a lifetime which may leave us feeling crushed. This is true in terms of personal experience and this is true in terms of national experience. When an individual or a nation experiences such crises, such crushing circumstances, there can be one of two reactions. It can be a reaction of illumination or it can be a reaction of lowliness and despair. Homiletically, the Gemara is teaching that our Kasis – our crushing experiences in life – should be L'Maor they should inspire us to overcome adversity and to rise to the challenges presented, they should not be "L'Menochos" – they should not lead us to a feeling of lowliness and despair.

This characteristic of rising to the challenge in the face of adversity, of confronting life's crushing moments with illumination rather than despair is portrayed beautifully by the personalities of the hero and the heroine of the Megillah. Our Sages relate that this attribute is hinted at by their names. The Rabbis connect the name Mordechai to Mera Dachya, a spice that diffuses fragrance only after it has been processed. Likewise Esther is also known by the name Hadassah, meaning Myrtle. Here again the leaves of this plant have a very sweet fragrance that can only be released when the leaves are bruised and crushed. Just like the hadas is only fragrant when it is bruised and crushed, so too was Esther's potential brought out to its fullest by her hard life.

A person's ability to rise to the challenge of adversity, to be crushed and yet to illuminate rather than despair depends to a large extent on a person's possession of a wonderful attribute known as Bitachon. Our Sages have told us that women possess this attribute of Bitachon to a far greater degree than do men.

Many people use the terms Emunah and Bitachon interchangeably. But they are different. Emunah means Faith in G-d. This Faith can have many forms. As long as one believes that what happens to us comes from G-d and that ultimately G-d Knows what He is doing, this is Emunah. What happened is tragic – but ultimately it is for the best. Bitachon is a much higher form of Emunah. It means confidence – it is the Emunah Peshuta – the pure unshakable faith that what happened is not so tragic – it is truly for the best, even now.

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I believe we can detect this dichotomy in the respective reactions of Mordechai and Esther to the decree of Haman. Mordechai was in despair. He tore his clothes, he put on sackcloth with ashes. He went out into the midst of the city and cried loudly and bitterly. Chas V'Shalom to say that Mordechai had no Emunah. He did not lose Faith. But clearly, his demonstrated emotions are far removed from one who has confidence that the current situation is anything other than devastating. He commands Esther to take a drastic and desperate course of action – to go immediately before Achashverosh and pleadingly beg for her nation.

Esther does not share Mordechai's reaction. She shows more confidence and more cunning in her strategy for facing the crises. First she urges communal prayer, then she plans subtle action. She procrastinates, setting up one party and then another – stalling for time until the miracle of salvation which she confidently expects to occur indeed happens. When Esther finally appears before Achashverosh, the Megillah relates "Vayehi b'yom haShleshi, vaTilbash Esther Malchus" (And it was on the third day that Esther donned royalty…). The Talmud comments, it doesn't say she donned royal clothing, it says she donned royalty. This means, the Gemara says, Ruach HaKodesh -- the Holy Spirit of the Divine Presence clothed her. The Talmud elsewhere states "She'ayn Shechinah Shoreh, lo m'toch Atzvus v'lo m'toch Atzlus" the Divine Presence does not rest on a person who is either in a state of despair or despondence. Clearly then, Esther HaMalka who had the Divine Presence accompany her at this time of crises faced the crises not with gloom or panic, but with complete confidence in Divine Help and complete confidence in success. Such is the attribute of Bitachon that Jewish women have demonstrated from the earliest days of our history.

Yonah Malka, I am told from reliable sources that you -- even before having reached the age of Jewish womanhood which you arrive at this week -- have acquired from your mother and from all Jewish mothers before her the wonderful attributes demonstrated by Esther HaMalka. You have been challenged with a condition that impacts your great artistic abilities, that impacts your love of reading, and that impacts your ability to see many things that you would like to see but cannot. But you have reacted with Bitachon and confidence. You have told your mother that "HaShem must have his reasons for not wanting me to see certain things". While it is clear that you are challenged with poor vision, clearly G-d has given you the trademark of the disciples of Avraham Avinu -- an Ayin Tova. A Good Eye, in the sense of a positive outlook on life – the ability to always see the cup as half full rather than half empty – and to recognize the gratitude we owe to HaKadosh Baruch Hu for every single drop he puts in our cups rather than to complain or despair about the part of the cup which appears to be empty. You have learned and you teach others the lesson of Kasis L'Maor – pressed to illuminate, v'lo Kasis l'menochos rather than pressed into lowliness.

Your mother told me that she can never stop singing your praises. You are everything she could have ever hoped for in a first born child. May you always continue to be that source of Nachas to your parents and to Klal Yisroel and may you Yona Malka always experience the blessing brought about through the agency of Esther HaMalka: LaYehodim Hayesa Ora V'Simcha, V'Sasson, V'Yekor: The Jews had Light and Gladness and Joy and Honor.

Mazal Tov and Good Shabbos to you all.

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Yom HaAtzmaut 5761April 28, 2001

Under normal circumstances, I would not speak today. The Executive Committee may have decided to extend the Rabbi's Sabbatical by a couple of weeks due to the situation with his house, but they have not formally extended my contract to deliver monthly sermons during the Rabbi's absence. Since I have no strong personal drive to give sermons and in general appreciate very much davening in a service without sermons, my primary instinct would be to remain in my seat and continue immediately with Mussaf. But, today being Hay Iyar, the 53rd anniversary of the proclamation of the State of Israel, I feel that it is appropriate to take a few moments to contemplate this occasion. So to quote Yeshaya, "L'maan Tziyon lo eche-she; u'lmaan Yerushalyaim lo Eshkot" – For the sake of Zion I will not be quiet and for the sake of Jerusalem I will not be silent."

The Medrash tells us that Solomon wrote three books with Ruach HaKodesh, Divine Inspiration: Shir HaShirim, Mishlei, and Koheles. The Medrash goes on to specify (according to

one opinion) that these books were composed chronologically: Shir HaShirim Solomon wrote "b'Katnuso"; Mishlei he wrote "b'Yalduso", and Koheles he wrote "b'Ziknuso". This sequence has a lot of intuitive appeal. Shir HaShirim which is a song of Romance and of Love, Shlomo wrote in his boyish youth. Mishlei which is a book of parables and wisdom he wrote when he was a bit more mature. Finally Koheles which is a book of skepticism and cynicism he wrote in his old age.

What often escapes us in hearing this well known Medrash is the fact that Shlomo never reached the age of "Zikna". Pirke Avos defines Zikna as 60 years old. Shlomo died in his early 50s! We see clearly, therefore, that one can be in his early 50s and yet reach the psychological state of Zikna as expressed by King Shlomo in the Book of Koheles.

It is interesting to note that some 45 years ago in the early years of Medinat Yisrael, Rav Soloveitchik, zt"l, delivered a magnificent Yom Hatzmaut Drasha based on a truly inspired exposition of the verses of Shir HaShirim. This lecture, which has become required reading in the Religious

Zionist school system in Israel and which has been reprinted in numerous languages, is entitled "Kol Dodi Dofek". "The Voice of My Beloved Knocks". Like Shir HaShirim this essay is filled with Love, Romance, and Passion. Like Shir HaShirim, this essay was written "b'Katnuso" – when Medinat Yisrael was yet in its earliest stages of development – still a young embodiment of 2 millennium of dreams and of hopes.

On Yom HaAtzmuat 5761, Medinat Yisrael, like King Shlomo "b'ziknuso" is already in its early fifties.I cannot help but wonder, if the Rav would still be alive today, whether his inspired eloquence and prose would not be expounding on this Yom HaAztmuat from that other Sefer in Shlomo HaMelech's Trilogy – the book of Koheles – a book that (at least on its surface) appears filled with nothing but skepticism and cynicism.

The book of Koheles, like Medinat Yisrael, was for many years a subject of controversy and even pain among the Sages of Israel. The Talmud relates of Rabbinic disputes which lasted hundreds of years in terms of defining the nature of the book of Koheles. Was it Kodesh or Chol? Was it Divinely inspired or merely Solomon's personal opinion? Was it to be treated as one of the Sifrei Tanach or excluded from the Cannon?

Indeed I feel that with all its contradictions, with all its inconsistencies and with all its controversy, Koheles more than any other book of the Bible best characterizes the feelings of

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uncertainty, the mood of anxiety, and the sense of mixed emotion if not outright futility that overcome us these days when we think about Medinat Yisrael on its 53rd birthday.

Shlomo was granted wealth, wisdom and dominion – he explored and tasted all of life's supposed blessings, but he found that the pursuit of happiness remained just that – a futile pursuit of an always elusive goal.

Medinat Yisrael has likewise been granted much Divine Help. They have been blessed with amazing Siyata Di'Shmaya in accomplishing truly miraculous feats throughout its tumultuous existence. But ultimately for all their accomplishments and for all their success, Israel today more than perhaps at any time during the period of modern statehood recognizes that she finds herself in a no-win situation. There is no military solution to be found to their problems and there is no political solution to be found. Every solution and approach that has been tried – be it by governments on the right or governments on the left – have lead to frustrating dead ends -- Gam Zeh Hevel, u'Re-us Ruach.. This approach, too, gives one a sense of futility and vexation of spirit:

The essence of frustration is disappointment – dreams that have not been realized; hopes and expectations that have not come to fruition. Our Sages tell us "Eyn Adam Meis v'Chatzi Ta'vaso b'Yado" – a person dies without achieving even half of the desires he hoped to accomplish in his life. We understand therefore very well the mood of Re'us Ruach – of vexation of spirit – which gripped haMelech Shlomo, b'Es Ziknuso and which grips Medinat Yisrael today on it's 53rd birthday. When I last spoke from this pulpit I had occasion to quote the beautiful words of a mother who said about her Bat Mitzvah daughter that "she was everything she could have ever hoped for in a first born child". This is a beautiful sentiment. Halevay more parents could say that about their children when they reach the age of Halachic maturity. And Halevay that all parents who say or think that about their children when they become Bar or Bat Mitzvah – could still say or think that about their children as they pass through that critical second 12 or 13 year period of their lives when they move through adolescence on to adulthood.

In fact it is very rare that a child should move on through adolescence to maturity and independence without in some-way disappointing or frustrating the aspirations that the parents had for their son or daughter. "Kneged Arba Banim Dibra Torah" – the Torah tells us that children are not all the same. Siblings can be very different from one another in terms of interests and aspirations and they can certainly be very different from their parents.

This is sometimes hard for parents to swallow. Parents extend unbelievable effort and sacrifice in raising their children to follow in their footsteps. Sometimes it does not exactly turn out that way and the parents are left asking themselves "Mah yisron L'Adam, b'chol amalo, she'yamol tachas haShemesh" – (what benefit does man gain from all his exertions under the sun?). Depending on the personality of the parents, depending on the nature of the child's deviation from the path the parents had hoped the child would take – the inevitable manifestation of independence on the part of the child as he or she reaches adulthood can leave the parents in a mood of great despair and frustration.

A generation or two ago, tens of thousands of Jewish parents in this country saw children leave the spiritual ways of their immigrant parents and proceed on a path of their own choosing – a path without Shabbos or Kashrus or Torah or Mitzvos. Recent times have seen the pendulum swing somewhat in the other direction. Today it is not rare to find parents

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frustrated in the opposite direction – disappointed that their children are rejecting a lifestyle heavy on material comforts, in favor of more spirituality, more Torah, and more Mitzvos.

Parental frustration with their offspring's lifestyle is not a new phenomenon and it doesn't have to involve either generation abandoning the way of Torah. R. Berel Wein tells the story of R. Yehudah Leib Eiger – a grandson and student of the great R. Akiva Eiger. In his youth he came under the influence of R. Yitzchk Meir Alter, the first Gerer Rebbe and ultimately he became a disciple of R. Menachem Mendel of Kotzk. Rav Shlomo Eiger, Yehudah Leib's father, was himself a Rosh Yeshiva and a strong Misnaged or opponent of Chassidism. When his son became a disciple of the Kotzker Rebbe, Rav Shlomo Eiger was heart-broken and sat Shiva for his son. Rabbi Wein claims that Reb Leibele asked the Kotzker whether he was obligated to fulfill the Mitzvah of honoring one's parent and therefore go be "Menachem Avel" his father who was sitting Shiva for him.

At any rate it has happened and it does happen and it undoubtedly will happen that parents get frustrated when their children do not exactly live up to their dreams and aspirations for them. The wise parent, will manage somehow, to get beyond the momentary hurt and disappointment. A parent can hope that a child will outgrow a temporary mishugaas. He can pray that G-d will help him 'see the Light' and return to the ways of his parents. But in the final analysis, a wise parent will come to the realization that after 120 years, for better or for worse, this 'child' will be the one who is carrying on the family name and the destiny of that family and its heritage will be in his hands. A wise parent will not magnify the differences and ignore the similarities that exist between father and son or mother and daughter. If one focuses only on the issues which divide the generations, the points of contention between parent and child, one is likely to overlook how much the child in fact is like the parent and how close in fact the parent has come to raising a child in his or her image.

Medinat Yisrael has had many human parents who nurtured her and who sacrificed for her. These parents came with many different aspirations and dreams for the young Medina. Some were seeking a socialist utopia; some were seeking a place where Jews could live together in unity and harmony; some were seeking a State where Jews could live in peace and security without the fear of anti-semitism and persecution; some were seeking a State renowned for Jewish Culture and Heritage; some were seeking a Medina al Pi Torah, a state that would be a stepping stone to the Messianic Era and to the Rebuilding of the Beis HaMikdash. But B'Rov Chachma rav Ka-as, v'Yosif Da'as Yosif Machov. The more aspirations we enumerate and the more dreams and visions of what could have been we catalog, the more we understand the frustration and even anger that so many people are feeling for the reality of the situation 53 years later.

But it is our responsibility to be wise parents. We must focus not only on that which divides the dreams from the reality, but we must appreciate the reality which has in fact materialized. To again quote Rabbi Wein, "our grandfathers would have walked barefoot through Europe through snow and mud to be able to see any kind of Jewish State in the land of Israel". Ashreinu u'Mah Tov Chelkeinu. How happy must we be and how goodly is our portion that we have merited to live to see the day that a Jewish State protected by a Jewish Army exists once again on our ancestral homeland. How thrilled must we be at the Kibbutz Galiyus that we have witnessed in our generation – literally, "If your dispersed will be in the ends of the heavens, from there the L-rd your G-d will gather you in and from there He will retrieve you." We have witnessed the fulfillment of explicit Biblical prophecies in seeing the Land of Israel again give forth its fruit to its returning sons and daughters – over 5 million of them, ken yirbu, after being barren for 2000 years. Finally, we must humbly recite a She-hechiyanu to the Almighty at the quality and the quantity of Torah study that goes on in Eretz

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Yisrael today – an unprecedented renaissance of Torah Learning -- both among the full time Yeshiva students and among those whose approach to life is a combination of Torah v'Avodah.

So as parents and supporters of Medinat Yisrael, there is in fact room for much Nachas. We certainly have what to be proud of and what to be thankful for in the accomplishments we have witnessed over these past 5+ decades.

But even if we are disappointed, even though we feel we have grown old supporting lofty dreams and messianic visions which have not fully materialized, we must not abandon those hopes. We must pray to Hashem, that the current situation is a temporary mishugaas that the Jewish people must pass through on the way to redemption. It is part of the circuitous path to Geulah that I spoke of on Parshas B'Shalach. Eventually, the Medinah will with the Help of G-d "grow out of this phase" and mature into the type of society and country of our dreams and the dreams of our ancestors.

Finally as wise parents, we must realize that, after 120 years – the future of the Jewish people will revolve not around what is happening in Seward Park or on Capital Hill or Mercer Island or Redmond. The State of Israel carries our name – and for better or for worse – that is the main stage where the final act of Jewish destiny will be played out between now and the End of Days.

It is our hope and prayer that Sof Davar Hakol Nishma, when all is said and done after 120 years, if not sooner BimHera B'Yamenu, we should celebrate a Yom HaAtzmaut of a country which can once again capture in the minds of its inhabitants and in the minds of those who dream to become its inhabitants feelings of youthful enthusiasm and the passion of boyish Love and Romance. May it be a country which lives by the principle of Es HaElokim Yi-rah v'Es Mitzvosov Shemor where all its inhabitants fear G-d and keep His Mitzvos – ki zeh kal haAdam – for this is the most fundamental duty of man. Good Shabbos.

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I don't doBoard Meetings

But I Might Be Willing To Speak and

Make PeopleBored At Their Organization's

Meeting

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BCMH Mens Club: Rav Baruch Shapiro's YahrzeitOctober 24, 1999

My cousin Mordechai Treiger asked his father Louis why I was being advertised as a 'Guest Speaker' -- "he's not a Guest speaker, he's here all the time". The truth of the matter is that perhaps in at least one sense I am a Guest speaker. Although I have spoken at many Mens Club breakfasts over the years, Rav Shapiro's Yahrtzeit breakfast is a special event. The circle of people who have spoken on these occasions have been for the most part from that special group of individuals in our community that had a particularly close relationship with Rav Shapiro, zt"l. I am not really part of that circle. My family never davened in Rav Shapiro's shul; when Rav Shapiro was alive I was not at an age and an educational level to appreciate his Torah learning; and to the best of my recollection whenever I heard him speak in public it was in Yiddish, a language which I could not really understand. So in that sense I consider myself a guest speaker -- someone who does not really belong here, someone whose insights will not be coming from the "inner circle", but from outside that circle.

The challenge of a Yahrtzeit -- especially a Yahrtzeit that occurs close to 3 decades after a loved one’s death is to try somehow to maintain the link with a member of a now departed generation.

Rav Soloveitchik, zt"l, used to say that the most powerful method the Jewish people have always utilized from time immemorial to unite generations has been the activity of Talmud Torah. Learning Torah is not just a didactic, formal and technical experience whose purpose is the creation and exchange of ideas. "Talmud Torah", the Rav said, "is the intense experience of uniting many generations together, the joining of spirit to spirit, and the connecting of soul to soul. Those who transmit the Torah and those who receive the Torah are invited to meet one another at the same historic juncture". He would refer to it as the “rendezvous between the Av Zaken and the Yeled Zekunim -- the wise old father and the clever young child. He used to dramatically speak of inviting the Rambam and Rabbeinu Tam into the classroom and introducing them to his students, of engaging in a dialog with Rabbi Akiva and Rabbi Tarfon. He used to emphasize that the Mishneh speaks in the present tense when it records “Rabbi Yehudah Omer”, “Beis Hillel Omrim” and so forth. When it comes to the transmission of Torah, it is not something that was said long ago -- Rabbi Yehudah Amar, Beis Hillel Omru -- they are talking to us right now, in the present tense across the generations and across the millenia.

The Rav used to speak of the "Massorah Community" -- a chain of transmission which links hands across generations -- the wrinkled parched hand of the old teacher reaches out to grasp the firm tender hand of the young student -- and connects that young student with the teachings of his own teacher and with his teacher's teacher before him all the way back to Sinai.

Rav Shapiro, zt”l, brought to this community the teachings, values, and charisma of his great teachers from Eastern Europe, and dedicated himself to the best of his ability to passing on these teachings and values to a new generational link in the chain of the Massorah Community.

Like I mentioned before, I was not priviledged to be a direct link in the Massorah chain that Rav Shapiro brought to Seattle. However, knowing that I would be speaking here this morning I e-mailed this past week an individual who did have the priviledge of learning by Rav Shapiro, who was greatly influenced by him, and who today is passing these same Torah

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teachings, values, and Charisma on to a new generational link in the Massorah Community. He was gracious enough to allow me to share his thoughts with you:

Rabbi Shapiro was a gaon olam who could have held his own with the biggest rabbonim back east. Yet hashgacha placed him in Seattle at a time that there were very few people who could appreciate who he was. Imagine being somewhere where you are not appreciated fully; where the shailos are mostly basic stuff and the potential for giving over your learning is very limited. One could become very bitter. I was very young at the time and not very perceptive about these things but I never sensed that he was a bitter person. Coupled with the fact that he never had children he indeed could have been a depressed and negative person but he wasn't.

In spite of the fact that he was a gaon olam he seemed to have the common touch and treated all people warmly. I remember him being mesader a get for some guy that all he knew about himself was that his name wasBarney; he had no idea of his Hebrew name and yet this is some of the clientele that he dealt with in a friendly, kind manner.

Rabbi Rivkin today is considered one of the great experts in Gittin. He learned what he knows, as did Rabbi Maimon from Rabbi Shapiro. For years he was the address for anyone who needed a get in the whole Norhtwest region. The fact that there all less mamzeirim around today and that the science of gittin is being practiced by the Rabbi Rivkins of the world is to his credit. Which just goes to show, that one can be stuck away in Seattle and yet his hashpaa can be felt well beyond its city limits for generations to come.

I don't know if you want/can/should use any of this , but these are the musing of someone who knew him when I didn't realize what he was but cherish the fact that he learned with an ignornat young bachur with great patience and understanding. Kol Tuv, Yissocher

As I said before, I can’t really give you a lot of personal recollections of Rav Shapiro. On the other hand, I don’t think I can be totally “Yotzei” my speaking obligation this morning by quoting an e-mail from Rabbi Frand. What I decided, therefore to do, -- keeping in mind the idea of Rav Shapiro’s Yartzeit and keeping in mind the idea of the unity of generations within the Massorah Community, is to speak about the two Torah giants who were Rav Shapiro’s own mentors and influences before he came to Seattle.

Basically what Rav Shapiro, zt"l, did for his congregants and his Talmidim, is to introduce them to the values and teachings of his own teachers. Rav Shapiro had two of the most charismatic and brilliant teachers of this century -- Rabbi Meir Simcha HaKohen of Dvinsk (known by the title of his most famous Sefer, the Or Sameach) and Rabbi Yosef Rozen, known by the city of his birth as the Rogatchover Gaon. I would like to spend a few moments this morning introducing you to them.

Dvinsk in Latvia at the turn of the century had a Jewish community of approximately 7,000 Jews; but for close to 40 years it was considered a major Jewish community by virtue of the fact that two of the greatest Torah scholars of all time lived there. As was common in many Eastern European cities, since the split in the late eighteenth century between the followers of the Vilna Gaon and the followers of the Ba'al Shem Tov the city had two major Kehillos -- both Minhag Ashkenaz, but one Nussach Sephard for the Chassidic community and one Nussach Ashkenaz for the non-Chassidic community. Rav Meir Simcha was the Rav of the Ashkenazim (as the Misnagdim were called) and the Rogatchover was the Rav of the

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Chassidim; but in truth this dichotomy was blurred in Dvinsk because all of world Jewry claimed each of these Torah Giants as their own.

The two had a unique relationship and were constantly testing each other upon the most esoteric and abstruse Talmudic questions, each humorously commenting on the other's Torah knowledge and greatness.

It is said that once a year the two Dvinsk communities davened together in a single joint minyan -- on Simchas Torah. Standing next to each other, while watching the rejoicing with the Torah, Reb Meir Simcha would remark "I have just completed a study and noticed that Rav so and so's name is mentioned in the Talmud only seven times.. The Rogatchover would pause for a moment, smile, and answer, "You know, of course, concerning the sixth time, in Zevachim, there is a mistake in the Girsa, and you made up the seventh time just to test me!"

Someone once commented in front of Reb Meir Simcha that the Rogatchover had a phenomenal memory. "Nonsense" replied Reb Meir Simcha, "he hasn't any memory at all. A person with an extraordinary memory is one who many years later remembers something he studied long ago with the same freshness. Reb Yoseif reviews the entire Talmud daily and is always in the midst of every portion of the Gemara. Is this memory?"

Indeed the Rogatchover, who used to go annually back to Rogatchov from Dvinsk to visit his father's Kever on the Yahrtzeit told the people in Rogatchov, one year, that in honor of the Yahrtzeit he reviewed half of Shas on the way from Dvinsk to Rogatchov…. And he intended to review the second half on the way back home.

In terms of memory, Reb Meir Simcha was known for his photographic memory, about which many stories are told. He said about himself that until he was age 60, he didn't know what the word "forget" meant. He heard the concept, but he never experienced it because everything that ever came into his mind was clearly etched there and available for instant recall. Since he had a sense of humor, he continued "… until I became 60 -- then I forgot that I was 60!"

Similar stories are told of both Reb Meir Simcha and the Rogatchover being "wonder children", of mastering Shas at an early age, and being consulted by great Rabbanim as equals when they were still in their early teens. The story is told that an elderly Rabbi came to town when Rav Meir Simcha was just 13. He brought a scholarly manuscript that he had been working on for years. He accidentally left the manuscript in shul one evening. Young Meir Simcha, picked up the manuscript, read it, edited it, and wrote incisive comments in the margins. When the older Rabbi came in the next morning and saw his manuscript marked up, he became outraged "How dare you scribble on my precious manuscript". He thought the youngster had been doodling on his life-long project. Later when he stopped to read what Reb Meir Simcha wrote he was so taken aback by the scholarship and the appropriateness of the comments, that he became a publicity agent, as it were, for the young illui.

Reflecting upon the challenge and difficulty of being the Chief Rabbi in the same city with the Rogachover Gaon, Reb Meir Simcha said -- later in his life -- that this was a punishment from Hashem for him Midah, k'Neged Midah -- because in his youth he used to publicly demolish the local Rabbi's Shabbos HaGadol and Shabbos Teshuvah drashas with his sharp questions and proofs contradicting the thesis of those Droshos.

When he was 18, Reb Meir Simcha married the daughter of a Zevi Paltiel, a wealthy man from Bialystok. Rather than support him directly, his father-in-law set up his daughter Chaya

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in business. She was a very successful business woman and Reb Meir Simcha was able to devote himself entirely to learning for the next 18 years.

In 1887 the Rabbinic position in Dvinsk opened up. Dvinsk had a relatively small, but prestigious Jewish community, and leading candidates from all over Lithuania and Russia applied for the position, succeeding Rav Reuven Denenberg , himself a well known Torah scholar. However, Reb Meir Simcha was recommended to Dvinsk by two or three of the most respected Rabbonim in Lithuania including the Beis HaLevi and was invited to take the position without having to formally apply or appear for an interview and without any previous Rabbinical experience. (This was a truly rare situation, then or now.). He remained there as Rav for almost 40 years. In 1906 he was offered the position of Chief Rabbi of Jerusalem and wanted very much to accept the position, but the people of Dvinsk literally surrounded his house and refused to let him leave.

During World War I, Dvinsk was right in the path of the advancing German army. Many Yeshivas and Rabbanim in the area (including the Rogatchover) fled Latvia; but Rav Meir Simcha announced that as long as there were 9 other Jews in town he was the Rav in town and he would not leave his flock.

Once he came the Rav in Dvinsk he insisted that his wife give up her business. He said that when you are in business, inevitably you will be involved in a Din Torah with people in town sooner or later. It would put him in a very awkward position of having to be involved in a Din Torah in which his wife was a party. Consequently they took a cut in standard of living, inasmuch as the Rav's salary was quite a bit less that his wife had been making from her business.

Although he had a good sense of humor, in many ways Rav Meir Simcha had a tragic life. He had an only daughter who died at a young age. He always bemoaned the fact that he would have no one to say Kaddish for him.

He was a strikingly handsome man. He dressed very aristocratically, and had tremendous strength of character as well as a very independent streak about him. He refused to sign on public letters -- the Kol Korehs with dozens of Rabbinic signatures (although he did give Haskomas for Seforim and made many efforts to support the spread of Torah Literature).

Although Rav Meir Simcha never started a Yeshiva, many students came to Dvinsk -- many in fact staying in his home -- and learned privately with him for periods ranging from months to years. He gave many people Semicha (including Rav Shapiro). According to Rabbi Berel Wein's biography tape, Rav Meir Simcha's philosophy was to take into account character and sincerity as much as actual learning accomplishment in granting Semicha. If he saw a young man had character and ability and showed promise of continuing on in his learning -- he might grant Semicha based on the presumption of future accomplishment, even though the particular student had not achieved the level of learning that might be necessary to get Semicha, say in the Volozhin Yeshiva. Despite the reputation for giving out Semicha relatively easily, many of his students -- certainly including Rav Shapiro -- were great Torah scholars and became leading Rabbonim of the next generation. I was told that part of the inscription on Rabbi Shapiro's Matzevah is taken directly from the personal Semicha given to him by Rav Meir Simcha.

The Rogatchover was a very intense man who did not easily suffer fools. Even many of his own congregants were afraid of him and came to Rav Meir Simcha who was a much more patient and gentle individual to ask their Shaylos. Although the Rogatchover, was

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theoretically the Chassidic Rabbi in town, when people came to him for a Brocha -- he would say "I am only a simple man; I bentch only after eating." "Go to the Kohain for your Brocha", he would say, referring to Reb Meir Simcha HaKohen.

It is told that a distinguished Rav was once present and he heard the Rogatchaver turn away a woman who came to him for a Brocho. He said, "Why won't the Rebbi give her a Brocha? The Mishnah states that 'Even the blessing of a simple man should not be light in one's eyes'. Kal V'Chomer your blessing, Rebbi". The Rogatchover snapped back, "Why wait for me to deliver the blessing with the aid of a kal v'chomer? You can do it yourself, even without a kal v'chomer."

Rav Meir Simcha on the other hand was gentle and soothing. If someone would come to him with a shaylah on a chicken and it turned out OK, with a great big smile he would say "I am very happy to tell you this chicken is perfectly Kosher." If that were not the case, he would not say "the chicken is traife", he would just stay "HaMakom Yemaleh Chisronech" (May G-d restore your loss). If a woman came with a Shaylah on a dish which turned out to be non-kosher he would suggest "Take this dish; wrap it up carefully. G-d willing you will have a Simcha some day and you can use this dish to break at you son or daughter's Tenaim". His motto was that the greatest task of a Rav was to bring peace -- peace in families and peace in the community.

I mentioned before, that Rav Meir Simcha had an independent streak. At a time when the greatest Rabbis of Eastern Europe were bitterly anti-Zionist, he took a very different stance. Although he was not affiliated with Mizrachi (or any other political party) he wrote as follows: "Zionism and their efforts are not against the Torah. I don't find in their efforts anything that will destroy the Jewish people, it will only encourage the faith of Israel in the future redemption. Zionism will afford us an opportunity to bring closer to Judaism those secular elements in the Jewish people who have drifted away. Therefore I see no reason to oppose them."

Zionism was not the only issue where Reb Meir Simcha found himself differing with many of the other Gedolei HaDor. In 1910 the Russian Minister of Interior convened a Central Committee of Rabbis, representing Russian Jewry in its relationship with the Czarist Government to discuss the "Jewish problem". The Russian Government was insisting that Rabbis have a secular education and learn the Russian language. The Chofetz Chaim and Rav Chaim Soloveitchik appeared at this conference and argued very strongly against those proposals. Rav Meir Simcha sharply disagreed with the Chofetz Chaim and Reb Chaim on this issue and felt that Rabbis should endeavor to meet some of the government's demands in terms of secular knowledge and knowledge of Russian. The majority of the Rabbis at this conference sided with Rav Meir Simcha against the Chofetz Chaim and Reb Chaim Brisker.

The hour is late and there is much more to say about Rav Shapiro's two great teachers. I just want to close with a few short Divrei Torah from this past week's Parsha from Rav Meir Simcha’s great and famous Torah commentary the Meshech Chochoma.

The Meshech Chochma says on the words “Vayehi HaShemesh Ba-ah” at the beginning of the Bris Ben HaBesarim that until this point in the Torah, the sun was always referred to as HaMaor HaGadol (the Great Light). Until Avraham’s time, many people worshipped the Sun. They felt it had independent powers. Abraham taught that the Sun was just following “Orders” from its Creator. It had no control of anyone’s Destiny including its own. It could only obey G-d’s command that it rise every day in the East and set every day in the west. In

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effect the Sun was nothing more that a Shamash -- a servant of G-d. That is why henceforth it was called Shemesh.

The verse says in Lech Lecha that Malki Tzedek, whom Rashi identifies as Shem, son of Noach, blessed Avraham and said “Blessed be Abram of G-d Most High, Maker of Heaven and earth. Then he said, (U’Varuch Kel Elyon, asher Migen Tzarech b’Yadecha) “And blessed be G-d the Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand.” Finally the Pasuk concludes “Vayiten Lo Ma’aser Mekol”. According to the simple interpretation Avram gave Malki Tzedek 10% of the spoils of war. (Malki Tzedek was a Kohen, a Priest and this symbolized, according to Ramba”n that Avraham’s descendants would give a tithe to the Leviim). The Meshech Chochmah brings a Derush that the words “VaYiten Lo Ma’aser Me’kol” are a continuation of Malki Tzedek’s brocha to Avraham. “And G-d (Kel Elyon) gave Avraham a tenth of the 70 Nations of the World who descended from Noach -- namely the 7 Nations of Canaan.

On the verse (Im M’chut v’ad Seroch Naal, v’Im Ekach M’kol asher Lach) “I will not take a thread or even a shoestrap for myself from any of the spoil so that you not be able to say ‘I am the one that made Abraham rich’”, the Gemara in Chulin states in the merit of this Kiddush Hashem by Avram, his descendents were given the Mitzvah of Tzisis (the thread) and Tefillin (the strap). The Meshech Chochma suggests that this is the reason why these two Mitzvos which fundamentally are to be performed during the entire day, are especially associated with the Tefilas Shachris -- which was the specific prayer enacted by Avraham Avinu (Berachos: Perek Tefilas HaShachar).

Finally, one last vort from Rav Meir Simcha -- which I think has particular historical relevance to our time and the topic addressed by Rabbi Kletenik in yesterday’s sermon. On the verses [13:14-15] “... lift up now your eyes and look from the place where you are standing, northward and southward, east and west. For all the land which you see to you will I give it and to your seed forever.” The Meshech Chochma writes “The matters is that the Land of Israel is holier than all other lands and is under Divine Providence. And even when it is in the hands of foreigners, nevertheless its Sanctity is not nullified. Thus it was in the days of Avram that G-d gave him the land even though (the verse states) ‘the Cannaanites were then in the land’ and even though he had to pay 400 Shekel for a parcel of land; nevertheless the land was given to him, meaning that the Sanctity of G-d was present on the Land which did not come under the jurisdiction of any Constellation or other Heavenly Force. (The proof of this) is that even in his time we are told in Yevamos that the years Abraham and Sarah lived outside of the Land of Israel did not count towards the 10 childless years of marriage they experienced. Therefore, by saying “Lift up your eyes” G-d is telling Avraham even though by looking at the facts on the ground -- it may not appear to you that the Land belongs to you -- for the Canaanites are bound to it like a dog and are nursing its breasts, nevertheless if you lift your eyes (and check the facts in Heaven) you will see that the Land is Sanctified with a holiness that is appropriate (only) for you and your children.

Reb Meir Simcha did not leave any children and in the narrow sense did not have anyone to say Kaddish for him. Rav Shapiro, like Rav Meir Simcha was an aristocrat; an independent individual; a gentle and peace-loving individual; a recognized Torah scholar of the first order. Like Reb Meir Simcha, he did not leave any children and in the narrow sense did not have anyone to say Kaddish.

However, Chazal tell us, "V'Shinantam Le'Vanecha" -- elu Talmidecha (You shall teach your children; these refer to your students). Torah Teachers who stretch out the link of the Massorah community to the next generation, who introduce their disciples to the Teachings

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and Values of the Great members of the Massorah community from whom they have in turn themselves been taught, do leave over children. We who are witnessing Baruch Hashem a Torah Renaissance in this community and in other Orthodox communities throughout the country are united in soul and in spirit with that of all the great teachers of Israel, m'dor dor. We owe a debt of gratitude to Rabbi Shapiro for helping unite us with that Massorah community. Rav Shapiro’s name was Baruch,. Yehei Zichro Baruch. May his Memory be Blessed.

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Torah, Avodah & Gemillas Chassodim: How do the 3 Pillars of the World Support a Woman’s Quest for Spirituality?

October 2002

Several months ago, I received an e-mail from Laurie Young asking me some penetrating questions about a woman’s quest for spirituality in Judaism – how Torah study fits into a woman’s spiritual equation in the Jewish world outlook, and what exactly were a Jewish woman’s “options” so to speak in deciding how to channel her spiritual resources between Torah study or intellectual activity on the one hand and Gemillas Chessed or doing acts of kindness on the other hand.

At the time I e-mailed back a few off the top of my head thoughts on the matter and I believe I also snail mailed her a citation or two on the topic, assuring her that it was a very good question and I had only scratched the surface with my response to her.

Well Laurie is a very persistent “Young” woman (no pun intended) and a few months later she sent me another e-mail telling me that she is arranging a series of monthly lectures for Jewish women on the ‘Island’ and she invited me to discuss this same topic in an expanded forum at one of those sessions. As Laurie put it in her second note “Hashem put the idea into my head that you should talk to the women of Mercer Island on this topic”.

I responded to Laurie that “if Hashem put the idea into your head that I should talk on this topic, then who am I to refuse”? And in that vein, although I certainly do not consider myself an expert or any type of halachic authority on this issue, out of respect for Laurie’s sincerity and interest in the topic and in the hope that other’s may share her interest in hearing some discussion of the matter, I agreed to come here this evening to share with you some thoughts on this topic. When it came time to actually come up with a catchy title for publicity and the like, Laurie and I again exchanged a few e-mails and came up with the advertised title: “Torah, Avodah & Gemillas Chassodim: How do the Three Pillars of the World Support a Woman’s Quest for Spirituality”.

This title of course comes from the words of Shimon HaTzadik in the second Mishneh of Pirkei Avot: Al Shlosha Devorim haOlam Omed, Al HaTorah, v’al HaAvodah, v’al Gemilut Chassadim. The world stands on three pillars – on Torah, on Prayer, and on Acts of Kindness.

Now there are a variety of sources in Talmud and rabbinic literature that discuss the superlative spiritual quality of each of these three pillars independently. We are taught, for example about Torah that students of Torah are superior to Prophets, one who studies Torah shields the whole world; one who studies Torah it's as though he built the heavenly and earthly Temples; Talmud Torah outweighs them all (Talmud Torah k'neged Kulam). About Avodah, too we are taught "G-d longs for the prayer of the righteous", and that the sacrifices played a critical role in the atonement of Israel, in all blessings that were bestowed upon the Jewish people, and indeed on the existence of the world. Finally about Gemillas Chessed we are taught that the Torah begins and ends with acts of kindness. In the beginning of Beresshis G-d clothes Adam and Eve and in the end of Devorim he buries Moshe. The Rabbis go on and on about the virtues of Gemillas Chessed: Charity is limited to the living, the poor, and money; but kindess applies also to the dead, the rich, and personal service.

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But while each of the pillars, are indeed individually praised and singled out by our Rabbis, it is axiomatic that the pillars are not alternative forms of religious service. It is clear from this Mishneh and from many other statements in the Oral Law that with only one or even with two of these three pillars of support – the world will not stand! Likewise, a person is not really a spiritually viable personality if he or she possess only Torah and Avodah without Gemillas Chassadim or only Avodah and Gemillas Chassadim without Torah or any other of the mathematical possibilities implied by this tripod of Divine Service.

There must be an appropriate blend of Torah, Avodah, and Gemillas Chassadim that is appropriate to the nature and makeup of the individual; and to the needs and the circumstances of the hour, What works for one individual -– male or female -- might not be the right formula for another individual. What works in one historical era or one geographical location, might not suffice in another era or location.

Indeed our Sages in the Medrash state that while each of the Patriarchs of course served G-d through Torah, through Avodah (Divine Service), and through Gemillas Chassadim (acts of Kindness) – each specialized in his own particular pillar of this tripod and uniquely tailored his Service to G-d by putting primary emphasis in one of the three areas. Abraham specialized in acts of kindness (Chessed l'Avrohom). He was renowned for his hospitality, for his taking care of the needs of others. Yitzchak specialized in Avodah – Divine Service. He was the "Olah Temima" the unblemished offering that was placed on the altar. And Yakov was the Ish Tam Yoshev Ohalim, the pristine man of Torah who dwelt in the tents, who spent years of Torah study – day and night – in the Yeshiva of his great ancestors Shem and Ever.

So we see, already, from the Patriarchal era that there is room for some flexibility in terms of how an individual seeks spiritual fulfillment, how an individual serves his Maker by fulfilling the Will of his Maker with particular emphasis on service through those areas which resonate most clearly with the inner resources of his unique soul. And I can find no source or logical reason for distinguishing in this license for flexibility in spiritual fulfillment between the male soul and the female soul.

However there is always an important caveat to remember when drawing practical lessons from the lives of the Patriarchs – be they their lives as described in the text of the Chumash or be they their lives as portrayed by the various Medrashim which elaborate upon the Biblical narrative. That rule is that the Patriarchs lived in the era – "kodem matan Torah" (before the Revelation of the Torah at Sinai). By definition their spiritual lives could be more flexible and "creative", if you will, than our own spiritual lives because of the fact that they did not have the binding rule book – the Torah – which precisely legislates and spells out for each of us – what is spiritually required of us, what is good for our souls and what is bad for our souls. Now it is true that there are Medrashic statements to the effect that the Patriarchs observed the Torah before it was given. But even if that Medrash would be taken 100% at face value – which it obviously cannot because Yakov married sisters and for a variety of other technical reasons – but even if we accept that the Patriarchs observed the Torah before it was given, still they were observing it as "ayno Metzuveh v'oshe" – as those who do it without being commanded to do it. Please remember this expression of "ayno Metzuveh v'Ose" (of not being commanded to do it, and yet doing it anyway) – as it is a significant concept we will discuss later in terms of a woman's obligation regarding Torah study.

Once the Torah was given at Mt. Sinai, it was very much a "new ball game" in terms of the spiritual obligations of the Jewish Nation as a whole and of the individual members of the Jewish nation. The specific spiritual obligations of the individual members of the Jewish

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nations were not uniform. This is an idea which might not be popular or even completely palatable for those raised on the Jeffersonian philosophy of equality. This is certainly an idea that is hard to digest for those raised or influenced by radical feminist ideologies. But the fact remains that in the Torah's world view for different members of (Klal Yisroel) the Jewish Nation there are different roles and different religious and spiritual rights, privileges, and responsibilities.

Kohanim have several privileges that others do not have, they also have several restrictions that non-Kohanim do not have. Likewise they have responsibilities and obligations that apply uniquely to them. The same can be said of Jews who live in the land of Israel vis a vis those of us living in the Diaspora. The same can be said of Jews who lived at the time the Temple was standing vis a vis those of us living nowadays. The same can be said of the unique spiritual rights, privileges, responsibilities, and obligations of men and women vis a vis each other..

Of course when I speak of Revelation -– of the newly regulated spiritual life styles for every member of the Jewish nation that came with Matan Torah – I am speaking of both the Written Torah as appears in the Chumash as well as the Divinely given Oral Torah which was transmitted by word of mouth from father to son and from teacher to disciple for well over a thousand years before it too took on a written form in the Mishneh and Talmud.

However, beyond the Written and Oral Torah, to add to the complexity and perhaps to the controversial nature of the matter, we have additional Rabbinic legislation and / or Rabbinic recommendations that became accepted as wide spread normative practice among the Jewish people. These Rabbinic teachings at times noted or codified prevailing practices in Jewish society of their time based on prevailing societal circumstance and to a greater or lesser extent became somewhat sanctified through their wide spread adoption by Jewish society of later generations.

Now I say up front without apologetics and without elaboration that many of the "hot buttons" that offend feminists, members of the Women's Liberation movement, and in general non-Orthodox members of the Jewish community are part of the Torah or Oral Law itself. The fact that women are not counted for a minyan, the fact that a woman can not be a witness in a classic Torah trial, etc., etc. are not merely "Rabbinic enactments – these are all part of the Oral Law that originated at Sinai. Some of these laws may have reasons and logic behind them which we can appreciate, some we may have to accept as Divine Decrees without apparent logic, like we accept many other laws in the Torah. Thankfully, these "hot buttons" are not what I've been invited to Mercer Island to speak with you about this evening.

What I'd like to explore tonight is specifically the Biblical and Rabbinic view – both classic and contemporary – of women's relationship to Torah study and then, based on that, try to come to some conclusions about how a woman might seek to blend her time and efforts in coming to a spiritually meaningful and satisfying balance between the various spiritual pillars on which the world is founded.

Now if we look just at the formal derivations from scriptural verses that we find in the Talmud regarding women and Torah study – we might erroneously conclude that Torah study has no place in a woman's spiritual resume so to speak. This, as we will see, is a classic case of over-simplification and perhaps confusion over vocabulary and terminology.

There are basically three gender related teachings, all based on scriptural derivation, which seem to circumscribe a woman's relationship to Torah study. First of all it is the father not

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the mother who is commanded to teach his son Torah. Second, it is the son and not the daughter to whom the father is commanded to teach Torah. And finally it is the man and not the woman who is enjoined to engage in Torah study.

Now again, I'm not going into "Ta'amei HaMitzvot" (reasons for the commandments) here. It has been suggested that perhaps the reason the Torah specifically commanded men regarding Torah study – and a variety of other mitzvot – and excused or excluded women from those obligations is because men's souls need the purification of Torah and mitzvot more than women's souls. Perhaps man's lusts and tendency to become spiritually distracted make it incumbent upon him to engage in intellectual and demonstrative activities to counter-act his baser tendencies to gain spiritual accomplishment Women, on the other hand, may achieve the same or greater spiritual achievement without these Divine obligations. They perhaps do not need Torah as an antidote for their baser instincts in the same way that men do. Some in fact interpret the blessing of praise a woman recites in her prayers in this same vein. "She-asani Kirtzono" (G-d has made me in accordance with His Will – in other words, a woman by her nature acts in accordance with G-d's desire and does not need a whole regimen of religious activity to mold her soul into the proper shape.

Be that as it may, the Torah does distinguish rather dramatically between men – for whom the study of Torah is an over-riding spiritual pre-occupation (to the extent that we are taught in the book of Joshua "V'Hagita bo yomam v'laylah) – you shall contemplate it day and night and women who would seem at best not obligated to study Torah at all.

I say at best not obligated to study Torah, because there are many mitzvot – sitting in a Succah, shaking the Lulav and Esrog, hearing the shofar blowing, etc. which women are not obligated to fulfill and nevertheless they may fulfill these mitzvot and it is universally recognized as spiritually beneficial for them if they do fulfill these mitzvot. [In Ashkenazik communities, following the ruling of Rabbeinu Tam they may fulfill these mitzvot even with the recital of a blessing; in most Sephardic communities following the ruling of Rambam and Rav Yosef Karo in the Shulchan Aruch they fulfill the mitzvos which they were not commanded to fulfill without reciting the blessing "Asher kidishanu b'mitzvotov v'tzevanu".

With Torah study, however, the matter is not that clear cut. There is in fact a dispute in the Talmud whether a father who is obligated to teach his son Torah is even allowed to teach his daughter the Oral Torah. Ben Azzai urged that Jewish daughters be taught the Oral Torah –- lest she misunderstand the basic meaning of Scripture, which is unintelligible without the Oral Law. However, Rabbi Eliezer unequivocally forbade a Jew to teach his daughter Torah. This latter opinion evidently was the majority opinion and has been codified as such in Shulchan Aruch.

However, there are a number of significant qualifications that post Talmudic halachik codifiers have placed on this prohibition, to render it almost moot in terms of today's curriculum in Jewish Day Schools and even secondary schools. Even in schools of higher Jewish learning, there is room for feminine Torah study, accomplishment, and spiritual satisfaction as we will mention in a moment. The qualifications on Rabbi Eliezer's prohibition against teaching one's daughter Torah fall into three categories: The scope of the study, the nature of the study, and the framework of the study.

First of all in terms of scope, the prohibition only applies to teaching the Oral Torah (what we call "Gemara" or Talmud) not the Written Torah. I might add, that practically speaking the way this qualification has been interpreted in contemporary times is that girls are not only taught the Written Torah but the Written Torah with the classic commentaries -- even though

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the classic commentaries to the Written Torah are based virtually entirely on the Oral Law! As my Rosh Yeshiva of blessed memory, Rav Goldvicht, once commented. "Even in my daughter's Beis Yakov in Bnei Brak they learn Chumash with Rashi on Parshas Mishpatim. But Chumash with Rashi on Parshas Mishpatim is 100% Torah She'bal Peh (Oral Law)!"

Second, in terms of the nature of the study. The prohibition extends only to theoretical study. Large sections of the Talmud deal with matters relating to the time of the Temple, to ritual laws of purity and impurity which are inapplicable today. Even the more "relevant" legal portions of Jewish jurisprudence are by and large theoretical today in absence of a Jewish court system functioning according to Torah law. It is these sections of Oral Law which are included in the prohibition of Rabbi Eliezer not to teach one's daughter Torah.

However women ought most certainly to master the details of the practical mitzvot they observe. Most authorities hold that this requires methodical study with text books. This certainly opens up as permissible, even advisable if not obligatory the study of vast portions of Torah Law – both written and oral – that relate to contemporary practice – be it Shabbos and Yom Tov observance, laws of Kashrus, of Family Purity, of Prayers and Blessings, and of laws governing human relationships. Latter day scholars include in "practical mitzvot" the ideological principles of Torah outlook and way of life. Indeed it is these areas that almost universally comprise the core curriculum of contemporary Jewish educational institutions on the primary and secondary levels. And it is no doubt these areas of Torah study which would be the focus of an adult women's quest for spiritual growth and fulfillment, as hypothesized by Laurie's original questions.

Third, there is a qualification in terms of framework of study. Even at the advanced theoretical level, the prohibition is only directed towards the father teaching his daughter Torah. Nowhere do we find a prohibition of self-study by women. There is also precedent – both in Biblical, classical and modern times – for gifted women to be taught advanced Torah lessons (and even to become Torah teachers themselves at a sophisticated level). This phenomenon indicates that the prohibition was not seen as an absolute rule with no exception, but one which was advisable as general communal policy, recognizing that there is room for exception to the rule in special circumstance or with special personalities.

Finally, I heard from one of my teachers at Yeshiva University the following interesting justification for why he learned Gemara with his daughters (over and above the curriculum they were exposed to in the Beis Yakov schools they attended). He explained that although, the Talmud might prohibit a father teaching his daughter Oral Law, virtually all prohibitions in the Torah are suspended for "Pikuach Nefesh" (the saving of a Jewish soul). It is on this basis that we have the well known principle that when there is an issue of possible loss of life, we feed a patient non Kosher food, we do not allow him to fast on Yom Kippur, we desecrate the Sabbath, and so forth and so on. Rav Chaim Soloveitchik used to pasken that saving a Jewish soul from spiritual danger was also a case of "Pikuach Nefesh". He ruled that one may desecrate the Shabbos to go retrieve a young Jewish boy or girl who was taken away by missionaries – even though they were in no physical danger.

My rebbe said, "I teach my daughter Torah She'Bal Peh because I hold this is Pikuach Nefesh". Today, that girls attend universities and are exposed to mature and sophisticated secular philosophies and cultures they are in spiritual danger of being impressed and influenced away from Torah by these competing philosophies. Unless I can demonstrate to my daughters that Judaism is more than just "Bible Stories" but is based on a mature and abstract set of axioms and principles that is as sophisticated and more so than anything that exists in Western society, they are vulnerable to succumb to assimilation and spiritual

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decline. I teach them Gemara, and advanced principles of the Oral Law simply because it is the only way they will be able to survive as committed Jews in today's society.

This idea was not just a radical approach of some YU Rebbe. A similar idea was already expressed a generation earlier by the eminent Hafetz Hayyim. He too, invoked the principle of "It is a time to act for the L-rd; they have violated your Torah" to urge Jewish women to raise their Jewish learning to the standards of their secular knowledge. At times we may waive a particular law in order to safeguard the totality of mitzvot and Torah values. This idea of "Es L'asos l'Hashem heferu Toratecha" is a very explosive concept and certainly in the wrong hands it could wreck havoc with Torah law and Torah values. However, in the case of permitting women to learn and even be taught Torah, this principle certainly has been applied in our day and we are witnessing literally a revolution of both personal and institutional learning opportunities for Jewish women who wish to pursue those avenues of spiritual growth.

Given, though, that these unprecedented opportunities exist for women to study Torah and to grow intellectually and religiously through Torah study – the real question at hand this evening is given where I am today what should I do with my time? Would G-d prefer that I spend my disposable hours in the Beis Medrash learning Torah, or visiting the sick doing acts of kindness? Would He prefer I achieve and spiritually develop along the lines of the Patriarch Jacob in the Tents of Torah or would He prefer I achieve and spiritually develop along the lines of the Patriarch Abraham with an open tent and a dedication to hospitality and the needs of others?

These are not easy questions to answer and the answer is not a general answer for all women. It depends very much on her circumstances and on her individual situation.

Let us start, therefore, with an easier question. What if the question is – should I go to a Torah lecture and have my husband stay home and baby sit the children or should I send my husband to a Torah lecture and I'll stay home and baby sit the children? Now, it could very well be that most of the women in the audience have already answered this question for themselves by virtue of their presence here this evening. This may not necessarily have been the correct answer, however.

The Talmud teaches [Berachos 17a] "Rab said to R. Hiya: Whereby do women earn merit? By making their children go to the synagogue to learn Scripture and their husbands to the House of Study to learn Mishneh and waiting for their husbands until they return from the House of Study".

According to this passage, (which immediately follows a passage that teaches that the reward of women is greater than the reward of men), a woman's prime obligation – in terms of Torah learning – is to see to it that her husband and son learns Torah. As we've seen before, the males have the primary obligation – the Chiyuv – to learn Torah. If a woman encourages the men in her life to reach their potential in Torah learning she has fulfilled to the highest degree possible her role in creation as "Ezer K'Negdo" (a spiritual help-mate to her husband) – and shares fully in the Heavenly reward granted for learning Torah.

Incidentally, this idea that someone who enables or serves those who learn Torah is entitled to an equal or greater reward than the person who learns Torah himself is found elsewhere in the Talmud as well [Berachos 7b]: R. Jochanan said in the name of R. Shimeon b. Yochai: The service of the Torah is greater than the study thereof (Gadol sheemusha shel Torah, yoser m'leemuda) as it is written: "Here is Elisha the son of Shafat, who poured water on the

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hands of Elijah. It is not said who learned from Elijah (although Elisha in fact did learn from Elijah), but who poured water on Elijah. This teaches that the service of the Torah is greater than the study thereof.

So we see, that in terms of spiritual reward one need not at all take a back seat in Gan Eden because one has been an enabler or a server of Torah rather than a student of Torah. This is particularly true for women who have no technical obligation to study Torah.

But spiritual reward is not always the same thing as spiritual satisfaction. Certainly there are women, who do not find themselves in a situation where they can or where they need to encourage the men in their life to study Torah. Certainly there are women who do not have husbands or sons.

It is certainly appropriate for a woman to seek out spiritual growth and connection to G-d through increasing her Torah knowledge. Obviously one's motive in studying Torah (for women as well as for men) needs to be pure and the study of Torah needs to be approached with humility and the idea that we can grow from Torah, but we cannot ever claim to fully "understand" Torah to the extent that we can second guess the Rabbinic authorities of ancient or modern times.

However, I am not at all convinced that rigorous and regimented Torah study is where a woman's spiritual preoccupation needs to be.

G-d, as we all know, has many names in Hebrew, each reflecting different Divine attributes. It is interesting to note that some of these Names are "masculine" in form and some are feminine in form. The name Elokim (translated "L-rd"), for example, is masculine. Elokim also means judges. It represents those who have achieved expertise in Jewish law, who have mastered complex areas of Torah study to the point that they are qualified to interpret and apply Torah law, halacha l'maaseh – in practical civil cases. The name Shechina (translated "Divine Presence), on the other hand has a feminine form. Shechina represents the attribute of G-d that nurtures, that watches over us, comforts us and protects us.

Without retracting at all, from my original statement that Judaism allows flexibility in how we place our emphasis in Divine Service – in balancing the relative effort we place in upholding each of the pillars on which the world stands, in my opinion there might very well be a particular affinity or bias of the Jewish feminine soul for the attributes of the Shechina – the attributes of nurturing, comforting, and protecting; while there might very well be a particular affinity or bias of the male soul for the attribute of Torah study, or Din.

Certainly, women should strive to be literate in the basics of Judaism, the laws that apply to them and to their households. Certainly a Jewish woman who feels moved to study Torah at deeper and more sophisticated levels than her peers and feels herself drawn closer to HaKodosh Baruch Hu, by that activity – should be given the opportunity to pursue it. Certainly there is room for Torah classes and Torah literature that meets the needs and the aspirations of Jewish women. This might be the same Torah classes and literature that meets the needs of a large population of Jewish men, it might be customized Torah classes and Torah literature.

However all that having been said, I must tell you that there are crying needs for acts of Chessed in our own Jewish community, and certainly in Jewish communities in Israel and around the world. If a woman has the talents and personal fortitude to contribute – be it organizationally or on a one-to-one individual basis with people in need, I would find it very

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hard to recommend that she should forgo that opportunity for helping another person and for achieving her own spiritual growth in that arena, so that she could set up a daily Chavrusa for Torah study instead.

As I said at the opening, what's needed is a balance – the proper mix of Torah, Avodah, and Gemillas Chassadim. One cannot perform acts of kindness with Torah sensitivity and Torah values without having learned Torah. One cannot be an ivory Torah scholar without expending the effort to help a fellow Jew in need – and there are always fellow Jews in need to be readily found.

There is a famous story involving Reb Yisroel Salanter the founder of the "Mussar Movement". Mussar is a Torah discipline that centers on building character, perfecting one's ethics, and developing oneself spiritually to properly serve G-d. It was in a sense a break from classical Torah curriculum which felt that if one would learn Torah, the character development would follow naturally. Someone once came to Reb Yisroel Salanter and posed the following question "Rebbe, I have only one hour a day to involve myself in matters of spirituality – how should I spend it? Should I learn Torah or should I learn mussar?" Reb Yisroel is reputed to have advised him to spend the hour learning mussar. "He said, if you will spend an hour a day learning mussar, you will realize that you have far more than an hour to devote to matters of spirituality, and you can then devote the added time you find to study Torah".

In a similar vein, I say to you tonight, fundamentally I believe a woman's highest spiritual reward comes from the acts of Gemillas Chessed she does for others. I feel that, in general, this activity resonates most closely with the soul of a woman who is by nature a nurturer and was created originally as an Ezer k'negdo – a help-mate.

However if a woman feels she has only very limited time to devote to spirituality, perhaps it is best that she devote that time to learning Torah –- particularly the sizeable body of Jewish law and tradition that speaks to the Mitzvos bein Adam l'chaveiro, the societal obligations between man and his fellow man and woman and her fellow woman. She may very well discover, by spending this time in study, that she can rearrange many of her life's other priorities and find more time for doing acts of kindness as well.

Before I open the floor to discussion or questions and answers, I'd just like for a few moments to tie up a few loose ends that I think are worthy of mention, but did not fit directly into my presentation as I arranged it.

The first is the matter of Avodah – Divine Service or Prayer. Laurie's original question to me dealt with the conflict or the matter of priority between Torah Learning and Acts of Kindness, so I emphasized that in my presentation, but since we did advertise that we would be discussing the three pillars of the world, of which prayer is one of them – I did want to say a few words on this topic.

Much has been made, in the non-Orthodox world over the fact that Halacha does not count women for a minyan, that women are ineligible to lead the prayer services, etc., etc. Again the purpose of my lecture here this evening is not to discuss the technical reasons or justification for what have become in certain circles controversial issues. But, I do wish to emphasize that traditionally and philosophically women have played a critical role in the development of the Jewish attitude and practices regarding prayer.

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The story of the prayer of Channa at the beginning of the book of Samuel which is read as the HafTorah of the first day of Rosh HaShannah is quoted extensively in Tractate Brachos as the source of many of the laws of personal prayer. Likewise, the prayers and actions of Queen Esther are cited as being the source of many of the laws of communal prayer. The famous Medrash in Eicha Rabbasi notes that when the Jews were sent into exile the prayers of the Patriarchs and the great heroes of the Bible went unanswered, but it was the crying of Mother Rachel that evoked the promise from Heaven that the children would eventually return to their borders.

There is much discussion in recent and contemporary Rabbinic literature about a woman's obligation to pray – exactly when, exactly how often, exactly how much, etc. Clearly the historical reality for many centuries was that women did not recite all or even any formal prayers on a daily basis. However, the lines of communication between the Jewish mother and her Father in Heaven were never closed and indeed, as mentioned before, it was often precisely the prayers of the women that were most effective.

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We are taught that there are various times during the calendar and even during the day that are most auspicious for praying – when the gates of prayers in Heaven are wide open, so to speak. However there is also a teaching that Shaarei Demaos, lo ninalu.—the gates of tears are never closed. Sincere, tearful prayer is always heard. Women by nature are closer to tears than men and in that sense have an easier time breaking through the Heavenly gates to have their prayers accepted.

Rav Soloveitchik used to say that Talmud Torah consists of communication from G-d to man and prayer is the reciprocal activity – consisting of communication from man to G-d. I know that in many communities – in Israel, in New York, and even in outlying communities there are "Women's Tehillim groups" that gather on a regular basis to recite special prayers – for people needing a Refuah, for people needing a Shiduch, for people needing Parnossah. I have heard and have observed first hand that the women who participate in such groups find spiritual fulfillment, find themselves being spiritually elevated and drawn closer to G-d, and when it is so willed in Heaven, do find that their prayers are not turned away empty-handed.

So the bottom line is that there is plenty of room for growth and for spiritual fulfillment for women in each of the three pillars on which the world stands – Torah, Avodah, and Gemillus Chassadim.

I just want to close by quoting a passage from Rav Soloveitchik that he gave as a eulogy for my great Aunt, Rebbeca Twersky of Boston, the Talne Rebettzin. I believe I sent this passage to Laurie when she first e-mailed me on this question and I believe it's inclusion is an appropriate wrap up to this discussion.

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[From Tradition: Spring 1978; pages 76-77]

People are mistaken in thinking that there is only one Massorah and one Massorah community: the community of the fathers. It is not true. We have two massorot, two traditions, two communities, two shalshalot ha-kabbalah - the massorah community of the fathers and that of the mothers. "Thus shalt thou say to the house of Jacob (== the women) and tell the children of Israel (== the men)" (Exodus 19:3), "Hear, my son the instruction of the father (mussar avikha) and forsake not the teaching of thy mother (torat imekha)" (Proverbs 1:8), counseled the old king. What is the difference between those two massorot, traditions? What is the distinction between mussar avikha and torah imekha ? Let us explore what one learns from the father and what one learns from the mother.

One learns much from father: how to read a text - the Bible or the Talmud - how to comprehend, how to analyze, how to conceptualize, how to classify, how to infer, how to apply, etc. . . One also learns from father what to do and what not to do, what is morally right and what is morally wrong. Father teachers the son the discipline of thought as well as the discipline of action. Father's tradition is an intellectual moral one. That is why it is identified with mussar, which is the Biblical term for discipline.

What is torat imekha? What kind of a Torah does the mother pass on? I admit that I am not able to define precisely the masoretic role of the Jewish mother. Only by circumscription I hope to be able to explain it. Permit me to draw upon my own experiences. I used to have long conversations with my mother. In fact, it was a monologue rather than a dialogue. She talked and I "happened" to overhear. What did she talk about? I must use an halakhic term in order to answer this question: she talked me-inyana de-yoma. I used to watch her arranging the house in honor of a holiday. I used to see her recite prayers; I used to watch her recite the sidra every Friday night and I still remember the nostalgic tune. I learned from her very much.

Most of all I learned that Judaism expresses itself not only in formal compliance with the law but also in a living experience. She taught me that there is a flavor, a scent and warmth to mitzvot. I learned from her the most important thing in life - to feel the presence of the Almighty and the gentle pressure of His hand resting upon my frail shoulders. Without her teachings, which quite often were transmitted to me in silence, I would have grown up a soulless being, dry and insensitive.

The laws of Shabbat, for instance, were passed on to me by my father; they are a part of mussar avikha. The Shabbat as a living entity, as a queen, was revealed to me by my mother; it is a part of torat imekha. The fathers knew much about the Shabbat; the mothers lived the Shabbat, experienced her presence, and perceived her beauty and splendor.

The fathers taught generations how to observe the Shabbat; mothers taught generations how to greet the Shabbat and how to enjoy her twenty-four hour presence.

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Kollel Dinner: Master of CeremoniesJanuary 8, 2000

The Gemara in Ta'anis [29a] teaches "megalgilim zechut l'yom zacai, v'chovah l'yom chayav". Auspicious events happen on auspicious occasions and tragic events happen on days destined for tragedy. The date the 9th of Av is inextricably bound up in the mind of Jews with tragedy and the day the 15th of Nissan is inextricably bound up in our consciousness with Redemption. I dare say, that tonight's date Gimmel Shevat is in my mind inextricably linked with the idea of Kiddush Hashem al Yedei Harbatzat Torah B'Rabbim with the Sanctification of G-d's Name through public teaching of Torah.

The third day of Shvat is the Yarhtzeit of Rav Moshe Soloveitchik who passed away in 1941. For many decades, on this date his son and successor, Rav Yosef Dov Solveitchik, would give an annual Yahrtzeit shiur at Yeshivas Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan in his father's memory on the night of Gimmel Shevat. The 3 to 5 hour Yiddish shiur would mesmerize the audience of hundreds and eventually thousands of Rabbis and Yeshiva students who would come from all over the Northeast to participate in these lectures of electrifying brilliance. For over 30 years, this event was one of the spiritual highlights of the year in terms of Kiddush Hashem and in terms of appreciating the power of Talmud Torah for anyone who ever had the zechut to attend. Megalglim zechut l'yom zakai. In my mind, it is more than just coincidence that this 8th annual Kollel dinner is being held on Gimmel Shevat. In my mind what the Rav's Yartzeit shiur was for the New York Jewish community in the 40s and 50s and 60s and 70s, in terms of spiritual Chizuk, is what the Kollel Dinner has become for the Seattle Jewish community in the 90s and now into the 21st century. It is an event which is invariably a Kiddush Hashem and invariably a celebration of the power and the attraction of public Talmud Torah in our community.

It is my great pleasure to now give public recognition to the Kollel Rabbis and their wives, the four young couples who have dedicated their lives to publicly spreading Torah teachings and Torah values in our community…R. Avrohom & Rooksie David, R. Michael & Devorah Cohen, R. Mordechai & Ruchie Farkash; Rabbi Naftali & Jennifer Goldsmith.

In addition to Rabbi Solomon Maimon, who I will introduce in a moment, I also wish to acknowledge the presence this evening of Rabbi Moshe Kletenik, Rabbi Simon BenZaquen, R. Bernard Fox, Rabbi Shmuel Kay, Rabbi SB Levitin, Rabbi Elisha Paul, and Rabbi Jim Mirel.

It has become quite popular recently to dig up old predictions of what life would be like in the year 2000 and see how close they were to reality.. Of course there were many forecasts which were 'right on' and there were also many forecasts which were 'way off'. For those of us like myself, who are long-time residents of Seattle, we remember well the predictions of the "futurists" of the 1960s as to what life would be like in "Century 21". We had an entire World's Fair here devoted to just such prognostications. Here again looking back, some prognostications were 'right on', but many were 'way off'.

There were "futurists" in Seattle's Torah community back in the 1980s and early 1990s who were making predictions about the year 2000 as well.. Predictions were made as to what would be the future of our community if we started a community Kollel -- and what would be its future if we did not. Baruch Hashem, we are not in a position to analyze the accuracy of

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the predictions where we might have been, if the Seattle Kollel had not begun in 1992. But looking back now, a complete Shmitah cycle later, we can evaluate the other set of prognostications. Like those of the World's Fair exhibition -- some were 'right on', and some were 'way off'.

Rabbi Maimon assured us in the early 1990s, that if we had a Kollel the community would experience dynamic growth and rejuvenation (with his traditional Sephardic pronounciation placing the emphasis on the second syllable -- re-JEW-venation). He promised us that the quality of our spiritual lives on an individual, on a family-unit and on a communal level would be improved. He promised us that the presence of young role-model families devoted to a Torah life style and Torah learning and nothing else would dramatically impact our individual and collective value systems and priorities. He predicted that adult Torah learning would move to the top of the personal agenda for scores of individuals who had never had the opportunity to learn Torah when they were younger and for scores of individuals who had once learned but who had since neglected to be Koveah Itim l'Torah on a regular basis.

There is a verse in Navi which sums up the accuracy of Rabbi Maimon's predictions: "… Lo Nafal Davar Echod m'kol devaro haTov asher Diber…" [Melachim I 8:56] There is not a single thing of all his good predictions which he predicted which did not come true (appropriately enough this is in the Tefillah of HaMelech Shlomo upon dedicating the Beit HaMikdash).

On the other hand, there were forecasts that did not materialize. There were those who said, "A Kollel will polarize the community", "A Kollel will siphon off crucial funds from the Academy and the High School", "A Kollel will undermine the authority of the local Rabbinate", "Kollel Rabbis will look down upon us", and all the other horror scenarios that nay-sayers are ever fond of predicting.

Anyone who honestly evaluates the situation in January 2000, will have to admit -- that none of this has happened. In fact many of these scenarios -- in hindsight -- contain a degree of ironic humor. In the year 2000, the Kollel has become the least controversial Torah educational institution in the city, Orthodox or non-Orthodox! The Kollel, through its own programs, and through its ancillary Discovery Seminars has served as a magnet for the Seattle Torah community bringing in new blood, new leadership, and new funds to all the existing Torah institutions. Kollel Fellows help staff the Seattle Hebrew Academy and the Northwest Yeshiva High School Limudei Kodesh departments. The Kollel Rabbis and the Kollel programs are widely known and respected throughout the community as being non-Judgmental, tolerant and concerned with teaching rather than with "labels".

Finally, as someone who has been quite involved in soliciting Rabbinic leadership to our community during these past several years, I can tell you unequivocally, after dozens of conversations with potential Rabbi and Headmaster candidates that the presence of a Community Kollel has universally been viewed as a plus for Seattle and a significant drawing card in helping interest qualified candidates to the idea of possibly relocating to our city.

It is a great honor, at this point, to call on that master of predictions, the Spiritual Godfather of the Kollel, Rabbi Solomon Maimon, to introduce the first portion of our program.[Rabbi Maimon will introduce Rabbi David and "Power Presentation"] 6:40 Dinner 7:15

One of the most gratifying results of having 7+ years of Kollel existence and success in our city is not only the number of verses of Scripture or folio of Talmud that have been taught, but, even more so, the number of individuals and families who have been inspired to not only

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change their own lives but to work with loving dedication and generosity to strengthen the Kollel so that its message and its inspiration can be brought to ever greater numbers in the future. During the next portion of the program, we will pay special recognition to a few such individuals. We will first have Rabbi Michael Cohen make the presentation to Skip & Liz Rosen and then Dr. Davis Fox with make the presentation to Jeremy Miller.

I mentioned at the start of the evening that one of the dramatic effects of a Community Kollel in Seattle is the new emphasis being given by so many individuals to the dictum of "Aseh Torascha Keva" -- make Torah learning a regular part of your life. This teaching is actually one of 3 teachings by Shammai HaZaken at the end of the first Perek of Pirkei Avot. A second teaching of Shammai in the same Mishneh is that of Emor Me'at V'Aseh Harbeh. "Say little and do much".

The Kollel has certainly fulfilled this second teaching of Shammai as well, with tonight's guest speaker. Although, as I mentioned previously, the Kollel Dinner has a reputation for bringing outstanding Torah personalities to Seattle to enlighten and inspire us, the publicity surrounding the identity of tonight's guest speaker certainly fell within the parameters of "Emor Me'at". And yet, once again the Kollel Dinner Committee has fulfilled the goal of "Aseh Harbeh".

They have brought us, an individual I consider to be one of the outstanding rabbinical personalities on the west coast. Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein is the Director of the Jewish Studies Institute, a joint project of Yeshiva of Los Angeles and the Simon Wiesenthal Center. He is a contributing editor and member of the editorial board of the OU's Jewish Action magazine. And is the Editor and Publisher of CrossCurrents an E-Journal of Torah and Current Affairs available by free e-mail subscription and on the web. I had the distinct pleasure of hosting Rabbi Adlerstein for a Shabbos in my home several years ago when he was a scholar in Residence at BCMH. I am an avid reader of all of his columns electronic and otherwise and I look forward very much to hearing the message he has for us this evening.

Birkat HaMazon by Rabbi Mordechai Farkash

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Seattle's Daf Yomi SiyumJanuary 11, 2003 Congregation BCMH

There is a well know minhag that at a Traditional siyum which officially marks the conclusion of a unit of Torah study, we not only conclude the unit we have just been studying – we also either restart the same unit or at least begin the next unit we will be studying thereafter. The best known example of this minhag is Simchas Torah when immediately after concluding the last verses of Zos HaBracha, we read the opening verses of Bereshis. One of the lessons to be derived from this is that we have not in any sense finished learning the Torah -- on the contrary we recognize the need to go back to the very beginning and start all over again.

Having participated in the Daf Yomi for the best part of the last 7 ½ years, I do not in any sense need to remind myself that I have NOT finished learning the Talmud. On the contrary, I am reminded very much of the feeling that Rabbi Eliezer expressed to his students [Sanhedrin 68a] when he said "Much Torah have I learnt, yet I have but skimmed from the knowledge of my teachers as much as a dog lapping from the sea."

So while I cannot proudly stand before you tonight and say that I have learned Shas, as co-chair of the Congregation's last Rabbinic Search Committee, I am proud to stand before you tonight and tell you that Rabbi Kletenik has taught Shas. In this connection I would like to quote an excerpt from an article I published in the shul Tribune in August 1997 on the occasion of the last International Siyum HaShas. The article was entitled "My 15 Top Reasons For Learning Daf Yomi". They've only allotted me 8 minutes to speak this evening so I can only quote one of my reasons. Reason #12: Develops a respect and admiration for one's Maggid Shiur.

"When developing criteria for the type of Rabbi our congregation was looking for, one of the requirements drafted by the Rabbinic Search Committee was that our future Rabbi "should know Shas". Such a requirement was wishful thinking from a number of perspectives: First, it was unlikely to find such a person; second it was even more unlikely that our Lay Search Committee would be in a position to know if any candidate we interviewed met this criteria. Speaking on behalf of the 5 members of our 1994 Search Committee who are now steady Daf Yomi attendees, having marveled night after night for over 2 years at Rabbi Kletenik's mastery of folio after folio of some of the least studied areas of Talmud, we are proud to report back to the Congregation that we have a Rabbi who deserves our greatest respect and admiration." So if I personally can say that I am making any kind of siyum here this evening, I can only be me'sayem the partial report I published over 5 years ago regarding our Rabbi's knowledge of Shas. We continue to marvel at his mastery of Torah – not just the page of Talmud he has prepared for us that evening, but clearly his mastery extends far beyond the page of the day. He is always prepared to answer questions and to quote relevant sources and texts from Gemaras, Rishonim and Achronim that were far back or far ahead of the current location of the Daf Yomi cycle.

Perhaps no less impressive than his mastery of Talmud is his ability to always clearly explain the day's blatt to a group of students ranging from those who have little or no background in Talmud to those who have already studied in Yeshiva in depth that particular masechta or perek in a way that everyone feels they are gaining from the shiur. Most impressive is the

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fact that he is able to take the infinity of Torah, the vastness of his Torah knowledge and to somehow emulate the Kabbalistic attribute of Tzimzum to invariably compress the Ein Sof – that which is without limit -- into the 45 minute sessions per day in which he is able to teach an entire folio of Talmud. We all know and appreciate the tremendous time commitment involved in preparing and saying this shiur for us day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. I know the Rabbi had been somewhat hesitant to start a new cycle of Daf Yomi with the implied commitment for the next 7 ½ years. I told him recently that I personally would certainly understand if he felt that there were other priorities to which he had to devote his efforts. On the other hand, I hope it is not being too bold on my part to remind the Rabbi of a pledge he made in the very first Drasha he delivered from this pulpit as the elected Rabbi of our congregation. In his inaugural Shabbos morning Drasha a little over eight years ago, Rabbi Kletenik announced a 3 point program he hoped to institute in Seattle to instill spiritual life and vitality into this congregation and into this community. That 3 point program consisted of – and I quote – "Torah, Torah, Torah". Celebrating tonight the conclusion of a complete cycle of teaching the entire Talmud Bavli, I would like to suggest that Rabbi Kletenik has now redeemed 1/3 of his pledge. We Baruch Hashem have been very inspired and very appreciative of the last 7 ½ years of Torah he has taught us. We anxiously look forward to at least 15 more years of "Torah, Torah", to fully implement the last two-thirds of the pledge he made to us that Shabbos morning.

As I mentioned before I have been given a time limit and there is much more I could say that I will not. However I do want to add one final postscript from the criteria the Rabbinical Search Committee set up in 1993. The Search Committee wrote that "The candidate should have a Rebbetzin willing to play an active role, as appropriate, in the outreach, social, and educational programs of the Congregation". Well in his inaugural address to our Congregation, Rabbi Bernard Poupko told us that the Congregation got a real "two-for-the-price-of-one bargain!" We certainly appreciate that insight of a proud and loving father more and more as the years go by. But I don't know if everyone realizes the behind the scenes role that our Rebbetzin has played in giving Chizuk to the Daf Yomi. The Rabbi has spoken on several occasions of the encouragement that his wife has given him to start up the Daf Yomi and the encouragement she has given him throughout this endeavor. I particularly want to make note of the numerous "mini Siyumim" she has hosted in their home – on their lawn, in their Dining Room, in the Succah. They were "mini Siyumim" only in the sense of number of Dafim covered compared to a Siyum HaShas – but each siyum was quite lavish and quite an undertaking in terms of the number of guests invited, the amount of food served, and the effort necessary to pull it off. As Rabbi Frand said at the last Siyum HaShas, it was Rav Meir Shapiro's mother who inspired her son to come up with the concept of the Daf Yomi -- and it has been the Nashim Tzidkoniyos who give encouragement and support to their husbands to participate in Daf Yomi that has truly made this revolutionary 20th century phenomenon a reality. Thanks to Rivy and to all our wives for their support and encouragement.

I would be remiss if I did not likewise express appreciation to Rabbi Avraham David and the other Rabbis of the Seattle Kollel who filled in for Rabbi Kletenik during those masechtos that fell out during the Rabbi's Sabbatical in Israel. A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link and Baruch HaShem the Chain of Torah transmission in Seattle is greatly strengthened by having such personalities as the Kollel Rabbis to backup and reinforce the teachings of our pulpit rabbis.

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Finally I want to thank my fellow Daf Yomi students. Since the start of our cycle some have made Aliyah to Eretz Yisroel, some have made Aliyah to Olam HaBah, some have gone up to learn in Yeshivas of higher learning. Some have come regularly, some have come occasionally, some have come just a few times. It is always a chizuk to have more people sitting around the table. Marbeh Yeshiva Marbeh Chochmah. Particular thanks to my cousin Dr. Shlomo Goldberg for being the Daf Yomi cheerleader and PR person from Day One on. It has been a particular inspiration knowing the busy schedule and long hours that Shlomo puts in professionally to see him come each evening stand by the Bimah shuckling away as he compares Rabbi Kletenik's shiur to the Yiddish Daf Yomi shiur he has already listened to on his car tape deck while driving back and forth to the hospital. I can only say about Shlomo, "A Daf A Day, keeps the Doctor in sway".

Again, in behalf of all of us, deepest thanks and appreciation to Rabbi Kletenik for all his teaching and for making this siyum possible.

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And Now It's Time

To SayGood-bye…

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In Memory of Mrs. Adele FrandAugust 2000

Mrs. Adele Frand, a long time Seattle resident, passed away on July 31, 2000. She married her husband Mr. David Frand in Frankfurt, Germany in 1935. He came to the United States in 1939. She arrived, with her eldest son Erwin, more than a year later in 1940. David Frand predeceased his wife in 1978. The Frands for many decades were dedicated workers for numerous community institutions. Mrs. Frand was an active member and fund-raiser for AMIT women, the Seattle Hebrew Academy, and our congregation's Sisterhood. She lived in the Kline Galland Home for the last 4 years.

* * *

Many people are aware of my life long connection and friendship with Rabbi Yissocher Frand. Many may assume, therefore, that the state of mourning that I found myself in when his mother, Mrs. Adele Frand passed away at the age of 87, fell into the category of "Imo Anochi B'Tzarah" - My friend suffered and therefore I suffered and mourned with him.

It is true that Reb Yissocher and I go back a long way and that we feel keenly each other's joy and pain. But the truth of the matter is that as long as it is that I've known, respected, admired - and been in awe - of my good friend Yissocher, I have known his mother just as long. My respect, admiration - and even awe of her - predate the respect, admiration, and awe I have for Yissocher. There was a time in my life, when Reb Yissocher was just a good buddy - not the great personage he is today. But there was never a time I can remember in my life when Mrs. Adele Frand was not an Isha Chashuva - a woman of great dignity, commanding the respect and even reverence of myself and all those who knew her.

Some 3 years ago at the world-wide Siyum HaShas, Rabbi Frand electrified the audience of thousands who were present and tens of thousands who were there by satellite hook-up when he credited the institution of Daf Yomi and the greatness of Rabbi Meir Shapiro, zt'l, its founder, to righteous women in general and to the mother of Rabbi Shapiro in particular.

Rabbi Frand knew well what he was talking about when he spoke of the greatness of a son being directly attributable to the dedication and the character traits of his mother. We all know of the son's great power of speech, his eloquence in stressing the importance of honesty, decency, and common-sense propriety and virtue. Obviously, the sources he is able to marshal, the talmudic and Midrashic citations he is able to use to buttress his points - all that he got from his teachers and from the 37 years he has spent in Ner Israel. But the basic conviction, the instinctual attraction to these ideas and virtues, and the drive to excel in promoting and expounding these ideas - that he got from the house in which he was raised.

Quite frankly, there were boys who came to Ner Israel over the past half century who had a superior background in Torah learning to the young man who left this community in 1963. I dare say there were boys who came to Ner Israel during this period who had a superior intellect to the young man we used to call Alan. But none of these boys became Rabbi Yissocher Frand. I am convinced that it was because he had something which none of the other boys had - he had Mrs. Adele Frand, of blessed memory, as a mother.

And so, when Mrs. Frand passed on, I mourned not just the mother of a good friend, I mourned a woman I knew well, an Isha Chasuva and an Isha Yekarah - a woman I greatly admired and a woman who was very dear to me. I dare say that other than my most

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immediate female relatives I got to know and observe Mrs. Adele Frand better than any other woman in my life. I visited Mrs. Frand, enjoyed her hospitality and conversation and insights in each of her 5 residences: Her home on 26th Avenue, her home on 37th Avenue in the Madrona district, her home in Bensonhurst, her home on Orcas St. in Seward Park, and finally her room in the Kline Galland Home. I shared her company and her hospitality both in the presence of her sons and daughter and when her sons and daughter were geographically far away. Even in Kline Galland she would insist I take home food or various plants or momentos she had with her in the room - a token of the great meals and festive hospitality she had provided in her previous four residences. We shared moments of crises and moments of triumph.

Mrs. Frand had a seriousness of life about her. There was always present a no-nonsense insistence on what behavior could be tolerated and what could not be tolerated -- a clear sense of what was right and acceptable and what was otherwise. No doubt her European upbringing and the trials and tribulations she went through early in life gave her an insight and appreciation of many things that those of us born in America have never fully integrated into our I-awareness.

Despite her seriousness and formality, she was a very warm person, a most giving and hospitable person. She could appreciate a good joke and had a hearty laugh which I used to love to hear.

I would be remiss if I did not mention the unique and extremely close relationship that Mrs. Frand had with my daughter Dena for the past 10 or more years. Dena used to visit her in her home on a weekly basis. She learned many things from Mrs. Frand who shared much knowledge, experience, and insight. Dena became almost a proxy grand-daughter. Mrs. Frand, years ago, gave Dena items for her "Trousseau" and made a supreme effort to be at Dena's wedding last August - which was virtually the only "social engagement" on her calendar over the last several years. For months she talked about Dena's wedding, what she wear, how she would get there, etc. She wanted very much to throw a bridal shower for her "proxy grand-daughter" from her "home" at Kline Galland.

Life does not go on forever. Mrs. Frand led a full life, a life which inspired hundreds directly through her own words and actions, and tens of thousands indirectly through the words and actions of her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren who continue and will continue her life's mission. May this woman who led a life of Yashrus, and who inspired her children in the way of Yashrus be a Melitzah Yosher in Heaven for her family and for all of us.

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Aunt Adele SteinbergNovember 2000

When I came back to Seattle as a newly wed in July 1973 with my new bride, Tzippy, one of the first things my father said to me when he met us at the airport was that there was some bad news in the family – Uncle Reuben had passed away. I arrived home last Monday from the Bris of my first grandson and called my mother as soon as I got in the house. The first thing she told me was that there was some bad news in the family – Aunt Adele passed away. In the intervening 27 years a whole generation has passed by.

It is really hard for me to contemplate that these past 27 years, which for me represent virtually my entire adult life – the period in which I have raised my children, seen them grow up, and now move on to lives of their own – for Aunt Adele this lengthy period of her life, can almost be said to be a footnote to a very full and vigorous lifetime. This was not because during her later years – as sometimes happens – she became less alert, less interested in what was going on and what was doing in the world around her. I was constantly amazed each time I saw her even in the later years – how alert and inquisitive she remained. Always preserving that sense of aristocracy and sense of dignity she always maintained, always prepared to dispense advice, wisdom, smiles, and even that devilish laugh that Steve referred to in his moving eulogy.

If I call the last years of Aunt Adele's life a "footnote", it is only because, the years of widowhood, of a woman whose contemporaries knew her as the "First Lady of Congregation Bikur Cholim", as the wife of a prominent and successful businessman, a Ba'al Tzedakah, and a distinguished and respected communal leader inevitably must rank as secondary to the years when she was in the prime of her life.

I guess maybe Irwin and Rabbi Maimon who also spoke at the Levaya knew Aunt Adele in the Prime of her life. In my memory – Aunt Adele was always a "Senior Citizen", although if truth be told, looking back now to those early memories of her sitting around the table with Aunt Dora, Auntie Rose, and my Grandmother, at that delight Oneg Shabbos table in my grandparents home – she was no older than I am currently (although I can swear she had a head of white hair for as long as I know her). Aunt Adele was certainly not my contemporary. She was not even a contemporary of my parents. She was a contemporary of my grandparents and of their remarkable generation.

The Gemara at the end of Maseches Megillah comments that the Kibud of Gelilah should go to the most distinguished member in the congregation, because the reward of having Gelilah –is equal to the reward of all other Kibbudim put together. Basically, to use a baseball analogy, the one who has Gelila and wraps up the Sefer Torah is the "Closer". The "Closer" is the pitcher who gets mobbed by his team-mates if his team wins the championship, even though someone else pitched the first 8 2/3 innings – just by virtue of the fact that he is the one on the mound when the game finally ends. L'Havdil, somehow for a similar reason the Golel is said to get a reward equal to the sum of all the other Aliyos which preceded him.

Aunt Adele was certainly the "Closer" of her generation – she outlived her siblings and sisters-in-laws and brothers-in-law in the Steinberg – Ketzlach – Elyn – Treiger family by many years, even by many decades. This was a remarkable generation made up of remarkable and memorable individuals who worked very hard for many things that my generation took and takes for granted – both materially as well as spiritually.

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The Gemara in Kiddushin (33a) relates that Issi B. Yehudah interpreted the verse Mipnei Seivah Takum commanding us to rise and show respect to the elderly to refer to any old person. Rabbi Yochanan concurred and would rise in front of even an elderly heathen, commenting "How many troubles has this one seen in his lifetime".

Aunt Adele, lived an exceptionally long life-time. She saw a life with many accomplishments, much laughter, and much joy; but likewise she has seen many troubles as well. She certainly has and always had my deepest respect and admiration. I will sincerely miss her and I am pleased to be asked to learn a few Mishnayos this afternoon in her memory.

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Remembering Uncle EckieJuly 2002

Dear Jean, Bonnie, Sid, David, and Macy;

I know you each have your own memories of your very special husband, father, and brother. Please allow me to share with you my own recollection of my dear Uncle Eckie.

In Shiur HaShirim [1 : 15-16] we find the expression "Hinach yafa ra-ayasi, hinach yafa.... Hincha yafeh Dodi, af Naim...". (It is certainly well within the realm of the style of writing for which Uncle Eckie had trademark mastery to darshen the word Dodi in verse 16 not as "my Beloved", as is its simple interpretation, but as "my uncle" which is also a valid translation of the word).

The Medrash Rabbah on Shir HaShirim [4:1] comments on the repetition of the word yafa in these verses. "Behold you are beautiful in your performance of Mitzvos; behold you are beautiful in your performance of your acts of kindness (Gemillas Chassadim);.... behold you are beautiful in this world; behold you are beautiful in the next world." This is most certainly an appropriate description of Dodi, Eckie Gordon.

Long before the advent of the internet and electronic mail we used to look forward to those memorable masterpieces of correspondence with the distinctive ALL CAPS typing that Uncle Eckie would send. Truly they were characterized by the initials WWW -- Wonderful Wisdom & Wit! We got the family run-down. We got to learn -- from a distance of some 3000 miles -- about the various up and downs, triumphs and troubles of the varied members and branches of the Twersky family.

Indeed, I always felt that Uncle Eckie was a superb addition to the family -- his soft spoken voice, his mild nature, his calmness and good humor was a much needed counter-balance to the more outspoken, intense, and high-strung nature of the Twersky gene-pool. (that's gene with a G! :-).

To be in Uncle Eckie's presence was even more of a pleasure than to read his brilliant correspondence. I have only the fondest of memories of the various Gordon visits to Seattle, my own visits to Philadelphia -- especially during the years when I was learning in YU. I always enjoyed Eckie's humor and his soothing demeanor and personality. I was always impressed by his thoughfulness, his kindness, and his level-headedness. I am especially appreciative of the special efforts made by Eckie -- and, Tibadel L'Chaim, Jean -- to attend both the weddings and the Bar Mitzvahs of Moshe Zvi and Alex. The Gordon presence at those events certainly added to our Simchas.

To Jean, I will say, that you merited to have a long and happy marriage with a wonderful husband. You have merited to see nachas from children and grandchildren. I know that no one feels the loss of a person more than their spouse. Particularly the loss of an individual as caring and loving as Eckie was is a very trying ordeal. May G-d grant you the strength to get through this trying time. May He grant you good health and many continued years of seeing nachas from the family.

To Bonnie, Sid, and David I say that I recall the pain and the trauma of my own father's passing over 12 years ago (and I was certainly comforted by your parents coming to Seattle to sit Shiva hear with the rest of our family). The keenest feeling I recall is that sense of losing

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one's "buffer" between himself and Eternity. It is quite a shock to all of a sudden feel that "I am the 'older' generation now".

To all of you I say, Eckie was a wonderful person. May you be comforted by your memories and the knowledge of your kinship with such a dear and outstanding individual. HaMakom Yenachem Eschem b'Toch She'ar Avilei Tzion v'Yerushalayim.

Sincerely,

David Twersky (Seattle)

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Not A Death Like "The Death Of All Men"September 2002

"If like the death of all men, these men die, and the visitation of all men is visited upon them, then it is not Hashem Who sent me" [Bamidbar 16:29]. Reish Lakish in the Talmud [Nedarim 39b] quotes this verse as a Biblical allusion to the mitzvah of visiting the sick.

Rashi on that Gemara interprets Reish Lakish's statement to refer to the end of the verse "and the visitation of all men is visited upon them". Namely, normally when individuals are ill and confined to bed near the end of life, friends and relatives will visit them. In the context of the verse, Moshe is saying "If these followers of Korach get sick and die a normal death such that there is time for people to visit them before they die -- then that is proof that I am not G-d's messenger. However, if G-d creates a new creation and the earth opens up its mouth and swallows them and all their property....

The Kli Yakar in parshas Korach offers a diiferent interpretation of Reish Lakish's statement. Here are his words:

Behold I have room to interpret this "visitation" (pekidah) in another manner. There are two purposes in visiting the sick. One is that we visit the sick to make sure their needs are being met. The second addresses the needs of the ones going to visit. For just as it is (spiritually) beneficial to visit a house of mourning in order that the living take serious note (that this is ultimately the fate of all of us), so too it is good to visit the sick -- for the visitor will thereby come to examine his own actions. For when people come they are often strong willed, distant from acts of charity, and do not have the Fear of G-d opposite their eyes. Their uncircumcised heart is too corroded to contemplate their own end -- for it is nothingness and destined toward a place of worms. This is the reference to 'Pekudas kol adam' -- for the outcome is that the end of all man will be remembered upon them. "Yeepaked" connotes remembering and the intent of the verse is that "if these people (Korach's followers) cause other people to remember their own ultimate destiny...." This is certain that by causing the people who visit them to remember their own fate (and thereby 'sober up', examine their own lives, and do Teshuva) a great merit will be brought to the masses (who visit the sick) and the sick person's role in causing this merit will suspend punishment that might have been coming to him (for his own misdeeds). If these people (the followers of Korach) earn such merit by first getting sick and causing other people who visit them to reflect on their own actions -- then I am not G-d's messenger. However, if G-d creates a new creation and the earth opens up its mouth and swallows them and all their property..... For from such a novel event, no one will reflect upon his own actions for it would not occur to him that he might suffer such a miraculous and unprecedented death as well.

* * * * *It is very hard to offer meaningful words of consolation, for the tragedy you have suffered -- indeed for the whole nightmarish experience you have had to live through for the past 10 months.

Unfortunately, there is a lot of tragedy in this world and Ari was, sadly, not unique in the illness he had to deal with. Nor, unfortunately are you the first family -- and, sadly I fear, you will not be the last -- to have to deal with the terrible ordeal with which you have been facing. But clearly this was far from a situation of "K'mos kol ha'adam yamus zeh" -- this was not the normal illness / death scenario that plays out all too frequently in this unredeemed existence of ours.

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However, while the sudden death of Korach's followers stood out (according to Kli Yakar) by its inability to move observers to Teshuva and closeness to G-d, Ari's illness and passing stood out for the unprecedented spiritual arousal it generated. It was an arousal which knew no limits in terms of geography, in terms of intensity, in terms of diversity of those affected. I know of no precedent -- whether it be for the great and famous or for the more humble and unknown -- to the outpouring of spiritually channeled emotion and devotion that Ari's illness and passing have inspired.

Certainly each member of my family – has been profoundly impacted – at a deep and spiritual level – by what you and your son / brother has gone through these past months and the way you and he have handled it. I know this sentiment is repeated by all the countless other families and individuals who have been touched by this situation.

If there is consolation to be found in this whole episode, it is in the fact that the great merit of the influence Ari has had on so many others will surely bring back equal merit back onto his own soul. May it be bound in the bond of Eternal Life.

It is clearly Ari's wonderful parents and family that helped make him the very very special young man he was in life. It is clearly they who helped inspire and spiritually arouse his extended family and ever-widening circle of friends and acquaintances during his illness and the time of his passing. May they share in his merit and may they be comforted in the knowledge that it is a vast pool of merit in which they are sharing.

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Siyum Mishnayos For The Shloshim Memorial of Ari GrashinOctober 23, 2002

In some ways it seems like only yesterday although it was approximately 5 years ago that Debbie Grashin approached me in this very building – during a Shabbos morning Kiddush – and asked me if I would be willing to be her son Ari's Bar Mitzvah teacher. Although she was aware that other than my own sons, I had never taught Bar Mitzvah lessons, she said that it was Ari's request and she hoped I would be willing to do it. I remember clearly how flattered I was that Ari felt he wanted to have with me that special connection that develops between a twelve year old and his Bar Mitzvah teacher and because of my love of Ari and because of my great admiration for David and Debbie I of course could not say no.

And de ja vu -- so it was all over again – when Debbie called a couple of weeks ago and offered me the honor of learning the final mishneh to conclude the Siyum mishnayos coinciding with the end of the Shloshim for Aryeh Noam Chaim ben Dovid Yehudah I am again very flattered and very honored to have this connection with this special evening's program. Of course because of my love of Ari and because of my great admiration for David and Debbie and their whole family, I could not say no.

It was just over 4 years ago, that from this very pulpit, Ari delivered his Bar Mitzvah drasha and with that trademark devilish look in his eye, he said that he hoped Rabbi Twersky would always be able to say that other than his own sons Ari Grashin was the best Bar Mitzvah student he ever had. Ari, I can do far better than that. I will always remember you, not just as one of my greatest students – I will remember you as Rabbi Chanina remembered his students.

"Harbeh Lamaditi m'Rabosai", Rabbi Chanina taught in Maseches Taanis Daf 7a. I learned much from my teachers. "U'Mechaveirai Yoser Me'Rabbosai" – And from my colleagues more than from my teachers. "… u'm'talmiday yoser m'kulan" -- but from my students I learned more than I did from either my teachers or my colleagues.

Ari and his parents and his brothers during this past year became teachers to all of us. I say this without engaging in homiletic hyperbole. They became teachers – spiritual mentors -- for all of us here and far beyond those assembled in this room Teachers deserving of Kavod and Yirah – of awe and reverence. Teachers who impacted our lives and imparted lessons to us – in terms of how to deal with adversity and to conduct oneself with nobility and distinction under the worst of circumstances, and most importantly teachers who demonstrated how to seize every opportunity available in life to spiritually elevate themselves and spiritually elevate everyone they made contact with.

What – after all is said and done – can man hope to achieve in this fleeting world? Only to leave a mark on others. To make somehow an impact in this world . The force and the scope of the impact that Ari Grashin made on those who knew him well, and those who knew him not so well – or perhaps not even at all – is truly on par with the impact made by great personalities who lived to ripe old ages and who had many disciples or had a chance to earn great reputations resulting from many decades of accomplishment in life.

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The Talmud consists of six orders of Mishneh, which are divided into some 63 tractates or Masechtos, representing virtually the entire corpus of Jewish Law. The project of completing the study of Mishneh of the entire Talmud is usually not a 30 day project. It would normally take years or decades. Many people do not expect to complete it in their entire lifetime. But what cannot be done in a short time frame by an individual going at his normal pace of study can be done by a community of many individuals setting their minds to make an intense communal effort to achieve a common goal.

What an appropriate and meaningful Siyum or conclusion to this spiritually memorable chapter in the life of our community. We have communally made unprecedented and intense spiritual efforts in behalf of Aryeh Noam Chaim over these last several months. The miraculous cure for his body that we were all praying for did not happen. But our prayers and our tears and our mitzvos were not in vain. If they did not help achieve the intended effect for Ari's body, they certainly left a powerful impact on the personalities and souls of everyone who participated in those efforts. And ultimately that impact is credited to the soul of Aryeh Noam Chaim. Ultimately, through the intense unprecedented efforts of the past months, this family and this community has given Ari the capability to spiritually achieve in his life a legacy that few if any of us in this room will ever achieve in our own lives.

I know that the capital of this legacy will continue to grow in the coming weeks and months. The Kaddish prayer will be offered, more Torah will be learned, more charity will be given and more acts of kindness will be performed to preserve and enhance this already unimaginable legacy of a young man taken from us before his 17th birthday.

And yet tonight marks a period of closure of sorts. The formal 30 day period of mourning comes to a close. The opportunity to express some pent up emotions that were suppressed at the time of the Levaya presents itself. And we now learn the last Mishneh in Maseches Uktzin to symbolically complete the communal learning of the entire order of Mishnayos in memory of Aryeh Noam Chaim ben Dovid Yehudah.

The Mishneh (Uktzin 3:12) states: רמאנש ,תומלוע הרשעו תואמ שלש ,קידצו קידצ לכל ליחנהל אוה ךורב שודקה דיתע :יול ןב עשוהי יבר רמא, )אכ ,ח ילשמ(אוה ךורב שודקה אצמ אל :אתפלח ןב ןועמש יבר רמא ."אלמא םהיתרצאו שי יבהא ליחנהל"

." רמאנש ,םולשה אלא לארשיל הכרב קיזחמ)אי ,טכ םילהת(םולשב ומע-תא ךרבי 'ה ,ןתי ומעל זע 'ה" ילכ

Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi makes note of the fact that the righteous in this world appear many times to not be receiving their just rewards. Many times we observe that the righteous suffer. To borrow a phrase from Ari, "It's OK", says Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi. Because, he says that in the future – in the World to Come --the Holy One Blessed be He will cause them to inherit worlds that are 310 fold more pleasurable and more substantive than this world. As it is written in the book of Proverbs (8:21) "I have what to bequeath to those who love me, and I shall fill their storehouses". The word שי which has the numeric value of 310 means literally to possess. The implication, the Ramba"m writes is that a portion in the world to come is the ultimate and only permanent possession that a person can ever acquire during his sojourn in this world. Rabbi Shimeon ben Chalafta says, "The Holy One Blessed Be He found no other vessel to hold blessing for Israel other than Peace as it is written in Psalms (29:11) 'G-d will give strength to his nation; G-d will bless his nation with Peace."

The Ari, the lion, is the classic symbol of strength. Ari Grashin was a courageous lion and a source of tremendous inner strength. He has gone to his blessing of Eternal Peace and I trust that he will find there the full storehouses of substance and possession that far surpasses what he had a chance to acquire and experience in this world. Hadran…

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Not Just Correspondence

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Dear Project Genesis / Rav Frand Mailing List Readers:August 2000

Over the past few days I have received 3 separate communications from readers who told me that either they or others they knew read into the Parshas Ki Savo mailing a nuance which was certainly not intended. Although I immediately responded to these individuals, because of the seriousness of the misinterpretation and the possibility that others were mistakenly offended by jumping to a similar conclusion, I wish to provide our readership at large a "behind the scenes view" of the RavFrand list, which will hopefully put to rest any lingering doubts about this matter.

Specifically, offense was taken at the fact that the first Torah insight was quoted in the name of "Rav Mordechai Gifter (Telshe Rosh Yeshiva)" and the second Torah insight was quoted in the name of "Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik,(1903-93)". There were readers who felt that somehow Rabbi Frand was "discriminating" against Rav Soloveitchik, z"tl, or against Yeshiva University by (a) not using the title "Rav" and (b) not associating Rav Soloveitchik with Yeshivas Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan, the way Rav Gifter was associated with Telshe. Nothing could be further from the truth.

In terms of institutional identification, Rabbi Frand in general does not provide biographical background information about the sources he quotes. The live audience in front of whom these tapes are recorded have instant recognition of the names of the leading Rabbinic luminaries quoted and need no institutional identifier.

When I began transcribing Rabbi Frand's tapes several years ago, recognizing the fact that many of the sources quoted would be unfamiliar to some of the Project Genesis readership, I appended to the end of the weekly write-up a list of "Personalities and Sources" containing brief background information. On numerous occasions affiliation with Yeshivas Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan is recorded in those biographical snippets (both for Rav Soloveitchik as well as other sources quoted by Rabbi Frand).

In recent months I have been moving away from the appended list of Personalities and Sources. I felt it was becoming tedious and repetitive. (I will be happy to e-mail a composite listing of these sources to any interested subscriber). Given, however, the fact that we are continually getting new subscribers, I felt that it is not inappropriate to occasionally identify a quoted source – at least in terms of the era and/or country in which they are from and -- for contemporaries -- the institution or city which they are associated with.

Given the above and given the fact that Rav Gifter, Baruch Hashem is still with us and is still the Rosh Yeshiva of Telshe it was natural to so identify him with his Yeshiva. Conversely, given the fact that Rav Soloveitchik, unfortunately is no longer alive, it was natural to provide his life span as a means of placing him (particularly since he carries the same name as his famous great-grandfather).

Beyond this fact, it is my feeling – as a proud alumnus of Yeshiva University and a loyal student of Rav Soloveitchik, zt"l -- that his fame, reputation, and accomplishments are far broader than his affiliation with the institution where he gave shiurim for almost half a century. [For an analogous reason, when Rabbi Frand quotes Rav Moshe Feinstein, zt"l, I identify him by his life span, rather than by Yeshiva Mesivta Tiferes Jerusalem (MTJ), with which he was affiliated.]

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As far as using the title "Rabbi" rather than the title "Rav" – here too the "blame" lies with the YU Musmach rather than the Maggid shiur from Ner Israel. Listening again to the tape (after receiving the various communications) I verified that Rabbi Frand does indeed use the title "Rav" (as he uses the phrase "zecher tzadik l'vracha) in connection with Rabbi Soloveitchik.

Of course, for myself, as for his tens of thousands of students and disciples world-wide, Rabbi Soloveitchik is and always will be "the Rav", par excellance. In preparing Rabbi Frand's oral lectures for broad dissemination, however, I often anglicize his Hebrew / Aramaic /Yiddish idioms and expression for the general readership. In fact, in just the prior week's e-mailing I referred to the Telshe Rosh Yeshiva as "Rabbi Mordechai Gifter". Obviously, there is absolutely no slight and no inference to be drawn from this literal translation of the Hebrew title.

If in fact, my proof-reading (and that of several others on the Project Genesis staff) of Parshas Ki Savo did not catch "a nuance of discrimination" between the use of the title Rav for Rabbi Gifter and the title Rabbi for Rav Soloveitchik, it is probably because the former's name probably appears in most publications where it does appear with the title Rav and the latter's name probably appears in most publications where it appears with the title Rabbi.

I am in fact embarrassed to belabor this point, especially two weeks before Rosh Hashanah. There are far more significant spiritual issues which we all need to confront at this time.

I urge all readers to please pay more attention to the message of Rabbi Frand than to the choice of words or titles used by those who prepare his shiur. The message is always one of tolerance, of Ahavas Yisroel (love of fellow Jew), and of giving the benefit of the doubt.

May the RAV Chessed (the Master of Kindess) tip your scales in the direction of Kindness [Rosh HaShannah 17a]. Shana Tova to you all.

Sincerely,

David TwerskyTwerskyD@aol.com

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A Grandfather – Three Times OverJune 12, 2001

When I awoke this morning -- a little after 6:30 am -- Ema asked me, "How are you feeling?" (I went to bed a little early last night feeling slightly under the weather). I said "I feel like a grandfather". She asked "Twice over or more than twice over?" I responded "Definitely more than twice over."

I'm sure you are aware of the "Segulah of 'osher' (with an Ayin)"; that is associated with one who is a Sandek. No more than 5 minutes after I had the zechus (for the second time this year -- this first being with Yitzchak Meir) of being a Sandek, Ema received Moshe's call on her cell phone. It was a quick kiyum of the "Segulah" of "osher" -- certainly with an Aleph, and metaphorically also with an Ayin. We are certainly very happy for you both -- and for the whole family!

Speaking of Segulah's, the first call I received when I walked in the house from the Bris (I had called Grandma from shul) was from my sister Judy. She wished me Mazal Tov and told me, with amazement, that she checked her calendar and found that her appointment with Rabbi Pinto was last September 12 – exactly nine months to the day ago!

I understand that you have your own Chesbonot and I am sure that it is not a "davar reik" either that in the last Aliyah of the closest Parshas HaShavua to your daughter's birth, the Torah deliberately changes the way it refers to Moshe's wife from Tzipporah to something else – "Isha Kushis" (Tanchuma – because of her beauty – pleasing in her beauty and pleasing in her actions -- the name is changed to avoid ayin harah).

As far as I am concerned both of these "coincidences" are note-worthy. "V'zeh v'zeh gorem mutar" [Yoreh Deah 87:11].

I'd like to share with you my own little "Chidush Halacha" on this occasion (more in the area of "Toras HaNigleh than Nistar). You are no doubt aware that the Shulchan Aruch rules [Orach Chaim 223:1], that when a baby boy is born the parents are supposed to recite the Beracha "HaTov V'HaMeitiv" (the Mishneh Berurah (seif katan beis) says as a davar pashut that the first time parents see a baby daughter they say a She-hechiyanu). [The Ramoh writes there is a widespread custom to be "meikil" in these Brochos -- ayen sham].

I would like to be m'chadesh that although the birth of a daughter does not trigger the recital of a HaTov V'HaMetiv in Siman 223, I certainly believe that having a daughter would trigger the recital of HaTov V'HaMetiv in Siman 221. There the Shulchan Aruch speaks of the Bracha one makes after a drought when it begins to rain. There is one brocha (Modim anachnu lach...) if one does not own a field. If one does own a field then it depends... If he owns it by himself, he says "She'hechiyanu"; if he owns it in partnership, then he says "HaTov V'HaMetiv".

The Mishneh Berurah (seif katan daled) writes that it is implicit from many Achronim that if a person owns a field by himself -- but he has Isha u'Banim -- (wife and children), then they are considered Shutfim (partners) -- and he does make the HaTov v'HaMetiv". Apparently a wife alone would not be considered a "partner", but a wife and children do qualify. The fact that one's "Ezer K'Negdo" is not a partner by herself, but that only together with children is a true partnership formed requires explanation.

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It seems to me that the explanation is as follows. Ideally a husband and wife should have identity of aspirations, identity of goals, and identity of purpose. Ideally they should reach the status of "Ishto k'gufo" -- such that really they are not two people, but a single individual. A single individual is not a "Shutfos" -- he/she makes just a "She'hechiyanu". Children, however (as much as you want them to follow exactly in your footsteps), you really never expect or perhaps even want them to be "K'gufo". On the contrary, a parent's aspiration for his children -- is that they should ultimately become independent (the Rav once explained this is particularly an aspect of the father's relationship to his children; more so that the mother's who wants to preserve the attachment to a greater extent – Ayen "Family Relationships" by Rabbi J.B. Soloveitchik).

Independence obviously is a "two-sided" coin which implies a certain distinctness and distancing between the parent and the child. It is precisely this distinctness that guarantees that there will always be at least "two opinions" (even when they happen to coincide) when a person has not only an Isha, but "Isha u'banim". It is the guaranteed presence of multiple opinions that defines a "Shutfos" and defines the Mechayev of the Bracha of HaTov V'HaMetiv.

Take it from me, when it comes to having a mind of their own, daughters certainly do not take a back seat to sons! (On the contrary!)

HaTov V'HaMetiv is the Bracha which testifies to our awareness that we must be appreciative of G-d's Kindness to us, in a non-selfish way. We testify that we are aware not only of what is personally beneficial, not only of what is perhaps selfishly gratifying, but of what is beneficial for the larger group as well.

Children, more than anything else in the world, broaden our outlook and make us appreciate the fact that there are needs beyond our own. They allow us to rejoice in another person's joy as much as in our own and they allow us to be appreciative of G-d's Kindness in a more global fashion.

In addition to everything else, the Bracha of having children is the Bracha of broadening one's perspective and being able to come closer to the attribute of "v'Halachta b'Drachav" (of emulating G-d's ways), by wanting to be a Gomel Chessed (doer of kindness) and having someone who very much needs to be a recipient of that Chessed.

Ema and I certainly rejoice in your joy and are overjoyed ourselves with this happy news.

Barachu …. She'hechiyanu v'Kiyemanu v'Higayanu l'zman hazeh!

Love,

Aba

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Thoughts On The Name: Ashira EstherJune 15, 2001

Rabbi Yochanan teaches [Bava Batra 12b] "From the day the Beis HaMikdash was destroyed prophecy was taken away from the prophets and given over to the feeble minded and to children." In light of this Talmudic passage, it is perhaps unwise to boast about one's having once made remarks which in hindsight appear to have an aura of prophecy to them. Nevertheless, I refer you to my remarks at Moshe and Tzippy's last Sheva Brochos (See: Not Just Speeches: Az Yashir Moshe; 3/21/98; pp 53-54; http://members.aol.com/twerskyd/Not_Just_Speeches/Index.html.).

At that emotional moment, I spoke of the various types of "Shira" which I said "I hope and pray will emerge from the Bayit Ne'eman b'Yisroel which the two of you are now establishing."

K'Darko B'Kodesh, Moshe has gone one better than his father. I anticipated that "Shira" would emerge from their Bayis Ne'eman. However, my children have creatively named their first child "Ashira".

Ashirah is a name of stunning beauty. As we all know, the Aleph is a letter of very small numerical value, but it is one of the most powerful letters in the alphabet. It changes the impersonal passive noun (Shirah=song), into the personal active verb (Ashira=I will sing). I consider Ashira to be a "Biblical name". It is not a Biblical name in the same sense as Moshe or Tzipporah or Naomi. No personality from the time of Tanach was named Ashira. But it is a Biblical name in the sense that many names we know of from Chumash were given to express a deep existential message. They are reflective of the deepest desires and emotions of the name giver. So, too, I know that for her parents "Ashira" is a name which reflects deep emotions and feelings of rapturous expression that can not be verbalized in words alone.

The Pasuk says "Az Yashir Moshe u'Bnei Yisroel es Hashirah haZos l'Hashem vaYomru leimor: Ashirah L'Hashem ki Ga-oh Ga-ah.." [Shmos 15:1]. There is something very interesting about the word "Ashira" in this verse. The subject of the verse is Moshe and the Children of Israel. We would have expected the verb to be either first person plural (Nashira) or perhaps even second person plural (as in Miriam's song "Shiru L'Hashem" – sing ye to G-d). The striking use of first person singular in the pasuk (Ashira), indicates that each person had his or her own personal sense of gratitude and overflowing emotion that he or she brought to Shiras HaYom. Moshe Rabbeinu had his own personal emotion that he expressed in the word "Ashira" and each member of Bnei Yisroel likewise expressed their own personal sense of lyrical gratitude as indicated by the singular term "Ashira".

So on this occasion, I do not want nor do I need to put words into the mouths of my son and daughter-in-law to express their own personal reasons for giving their first child this hauntingly beautiful name. But I too, feel today, a sense of "Ashira L'Hashem". It is my own, first person singular response to this momentous family milestone.

"Ashira L'Hashem" is an emotion which, as I said before, cannot be fully verbalized in words. Part of it is very private – strictly in the domain of "Bein Adam L'Makom". Part of it, one wants to share with friends and family – but he cannot find the words to fully express it. Despite these inherent limitations, I wish to share a few dimensions, from my personal perspective, of the appropriateness of the name "Ashira Esther" for the first child of my first born son.

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First of all, I say "Ashira L'Hashem" that Moshe and Tzippy-Naomi could not find a female name in the family on either side to name their daughter without going back 4 generations. What a bracha to have both grandmothers and all four great grandmothers, alive and shepping nachas from their beautiful children and granchildren. What a bracha to have such wonderful role models alive on both sides of the family. Without exception we are talking about outstanding women of valor, leaders in their homes and in their communities. Zweig, Schild, Twersky, Yudin: These are names of inspirational women who form a cross-generation chain of role-models for their daughters, grand-daughters and great-grand-daughters.

Second I say "Ashira L'Hashem" that we now have in the immediate family – more than 20 years after her death -- a child named after my beloved Grandmother, Esther Ketzlach, ob"m.. "Baba" had the name of a Biblical Heroine and I always considered her a heroine of Biblical proportions (See Not Just Speeches pp. 87-91). May Ashira Esther not only be able to emulate and carry on the Midos and traditions of the family matriarchs who are with us today, but also the Midos and traditions of her namesake and all the other matriarchs who are with us today only in spirit.

Thirdly I say "Ashira L'Hashem" to have a Sabra born into the family. I know that on the Zweig side, we are talking about a ninth generation Yerushalmit! What a Zechut! But from the Twersky / Ketzlach / Steinberg sides – I dare say that tracing Moshe's Yichus backwards one might have to go 2000 or even 2500 years before finding a family member born in Eretz Yisroel [Although the "Twersky" name is said to have come from the city of Tiberius, this is because they resided in a village in the Ukraine which they longingly named after the Holy City of "Tvereya".]

I mentioned at Moshe's Vort [See N.J.S. pp. 48-49], the very close connection that my grandfather, Mr. Ketzlach, ob"m, had to Eretz Yisroel and how thrilled he would be to know that his oldest grandson was marrying a Sabra and beginning his married life in Jerusalem. I dare say that he would be even more thrilled to know that Moshe's first daughter would be named Esther, after his beloved wife of over 50 years.

In a sense there is real poetic justice here. My grandmother, no doubt, was the one who kept my grand-father from making Aliyah. In life, his dedication to his wife, kept my grandfather away from his "other love", Eretz Yisroel. But he told his beloved wife that "death will be the separator between me and between you" [Ruth 1:17]. My grandfather was buried in Jerusalem on Har HaMenuchot and my grandmother was buried in Seattle. So I know that my grandfather would have a special thrill to know that he now has a great-great-grand-daughter "Esther" here "with him" in Yerushalayim. And he would certainly have a special thrill to know that there are now members of the family not only being buried in Eretz Yisroel, but once again after millenia of Galus, being born in Eretz Yisroel. Ashira L'Hashem Ki Ga-oh Ga-ah.

May the One represented by the letter Aleph, restore prophecy to the true prophets, may all Jewish families of the Exile once again have their children and grand-children born in Eretz Yisroel, and may we see the restoration of the Beis HaMikdash so that we my sing a Shir Chadash… Bim'hera b'yamenu!

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Esther MeiraAugust 26, 2001

Elul is the month in which we begin to analyze our past actions and start the process of making amends and doing Teshuva. Es Chatai, ani mazkir hayom: I've always felt somewhat guilty that my daughter Sara has been somewhat discriminated against when it came to receiving her father's attention. After all, if you look in Not Just Speeches there is a Dvar Torah that I said for Moshe's Shalom Zachor and for his Bris; there is a Dvar Torah that I said for Mordy's Shalom Zachor and for his Bris. I was, I'm sure, quite winded when the twins were born and must have been at a loss for words at Alex's Shalom Zachor – but at least there is a Dvar Torah for Alex's Bris at which I mentioned the special Simcha of having both a son and a daughter born. But Sara clearly suffered from the "Middle Child Syndrome" -- there is no mention in Not Just Speeches of her birth.

Sara has been a good sport about this. She never complained. But I often wondered if it wasn't somehow at least subconsciously because she did not get enough fatherly attention from me that she sought attention from another male figure at such an early age .

All this would have been bad enough on my part, but I now realize that I am on the verge of repeating the "sins of my youth" [Tehillim 25:7]. In "Volume 2". I already have included there [http://members.aol.com/twerskyd/ Not_Just_Speeches/Index.html] the Dvar Torah that I said at Yitzchak Meir's bris and the e-mail that I sent upon the birth of Ashira Esther. But nowhere is there mention of my sweet Number 1 grandchild – Yael Chava! I guess being number two out of 5, doesn't make Sara a "Middle child" anymore, but as we all know the "Upper Middle Class" also, often gets squeezed out of many perks in society. Chas V'Shalom, that Sara should still feel stigmatized as suffering from the "Upper Middle Class Child Syndrome" even as she becomes a member of the "middle generation".

Not giving over a Torah thought at the time of the birth of a child or a grandchild is a "Me-uvas lo yuchal liskon, v'chisaron lo yuchal l'heemanos" (A twisted thing which cannot be made straight, and what is not there cannot be numbered) [Koheles 1:15]. Sara, I'm afraid it is too late to make amends for whatever neglect you suffered as a child. Yael, perhaps I can make it up with a Dvar Torah at your "Chagigat Siddur – or at least, G-d willing, at your Bat Mitzvah. But for Esther Meira – it is the month of Elul (Ani L'Dodi v'Dodi Li) and time to turn over a new leaf for this new branch to our, Baruch Hashem, ever-growing family tree. Let me share with you my thoughts on your name:

Esther Meira, you carry the names of the only two individuals that I have ever had to eulogize at the time of their funerals. The words spoken and the emotions felt at those special moments last a lifetime. Indeed the impact of the personalities of my maternal grandmother and my dear father, zichronom l'Bracha, are deeply etched forever on myself and on all those who knew and loved them.

As I look back on the meaning and connotation of the names Esther Meira in light of my grandmother and father and in light of my new granddaughter, the thought occurred to me that the combination of names is most appropriate and significant.

The names on the one hand almost contradict each other; on the other hand they also complement each other in a most beautiful way.

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Esther comes from the shoresh of the word "seser" (hidden) as Chazal tell us [Chullin 139b] "Where is Esther alluded to in Chumash? In the verse 'And I will surely hide my face (Haster Astir panai) on that day' [Devorim 31:18]." But "Seser" does not only describe G-d's presence in a negative sense, as in the idea of "Hester Panim". It also is used to describe G-d's power and majesty as in the beautiful Shalosh Seudos Zimrah "Kel miStaTER b'Shafrir chevyon" (G-d conceals Himself in the beauty of secrecy).

In this second sense the name Esther is a beautiful name for a young Jewish girl because it connotes the idea of Tzniyus and modesty, the attribute of hidden-ness which is so becoming for a Bas Yisroel. I spoke at my grandmother's funeral about her modesty – her lack of a need to "show off" and to be flashy. The name Esther was most appropriate for her, and I hope and pray that in this regard my new granddaughter will live up to both her name and her namesake.

But if Esther represents "seiser" and the quality of being hidden; "Meira" represents just the opposite. Turning one page back in the Shalosh Seudos Zmiros we find (at the end of Yedid Nefesh) the beautiful phrase "Ta-eer Eretz M'Kvodecha" (Illuminate the world with Your glory). Meir / Meira means one who illuminates or sheds light. It connotes one who does have what to show off – not in terms of "flashiness", but in terms of clarity and wisdom. I spoke at my father's funeral about his attribute of sechel of clarity of thought and of wisdom and enlightenment. The name Meir was most appropriate for him, and I hope and pray that in this regard also my new granddaughter will live up to both her name and her namesake.

My Grandmother and my father had far more in common than the fact that I eulogized them at their respective funerals. They both were born in Russia and knew first hand persecution and pogroms. They spent their early youth in a period and a land governed by the phenomenon of "Esther" – namely "Hester Panim" and with their families they moved to America, to a land symbolized by the torch of light held by the Statue of Liberty off Ellis Island which served as a Meir (beacon of light) for hundreds of thousands and millions of immigrants in the early part of the 20th century.

Esther Meira, you too are born into a world in which we suffer yet from an element of Hester Panim. We witness daily persecutions and attacks in Israel and beyond from our enemies. May we soon see a progression from "Esther" to "Meira". May the light of Shalom come to our People and to our Land.

In a related vein, Esther Meira, -- as with my other grandchildren, you remain for now b'geder Hester -- "hidden" from my view. I look forward to the time when you – and my other grandchildren -- will be for me b'geder Meira, when my face will shine from the nachas of seeing you in person.

Finally, Esther Meira – you have combined the middle names of your two first cousins (Ashira Esther and Yitzchak Meir). This is a most auspicious beginning, for someone who one day may follow in her mother's footsteps and become a middle child herself. My bracha to you and to your parents is that you do indeed one day (B'Shaah Tova for Sara Tova and for Chaim Daniel) become a "middle child" and then even an "upper middle class" child; but that you never suffer from the "Middle Child Syndrome". May you have a long wonderful life, in which you live up to fine attributes of your namesakes and may you always feel secure and confident in the love and attention which will always be showered upon you by your parents, your siblings, your grandparents, and the entire family. Love, Saba

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Significant OthersSeptember 14, 200126 Elul 5761

My Dearest Children,

We have all heard the poignant stories in recent days of family members calling their spouses or their parents or their children during what they knew to be their last minutes on earth to tell them that they loved them… realizing that this would be their last opportunity to ever let their "significant other" know what they meant to them.

In the aftermath of the tragedy of this week and in the dawn of the period leading up to the Yom HaDin we all recognize that no one ever really knows when he or she will have their last opportunity to let the "significant others" in their lives know what they mean to them.

I therefore seize this opportunity to address you all – in my most comfortable medium of communication, the written word – to let you know how much I love you all and how much you all mean to me.

In Tehillim Chapter 27 (L'Dovid HaShem Ori V'Yishi…) we repeatedly state the fact that we have no need to fear because we trust in G-d. We find a similar phenomenon in the opening words of the Havdalah (Hinnei Kel Yeshuos Evtach v'lo Ephchad…). One of my teachers once pointed out that we say these words – indicating we have no fear – precisely at moments when deep down we do have fear. The days of Elul and Yemei haDin of Tishrei, the first moments after the departure of Shabbos – these are times of psychological insecurity. These are times when fear is a very normal emotion. Precisely then – when we are afraid – do we need to remind ourselves, by stating over and over – that we have no fear. [This is perhaps not too different from the 'bravado speeches' being given by many American political leaders in recent days.]

One of the sources of anxiety that we mention in Tehillim 27 is the fact that "Avi v'Emi azavuni" (my father and mother have left me). The simple meaning of this is obvious. When children are young they feel secure knowing that they can always depend and rely on their parents to provide them with all their needs. They know their parents will be there to "catch them" if they fall; to comfort them if they get hurt; and to nurse them back to health if they get sick. There can be great trauma in observing that one has reached a state in life where that "security blanket" is no longer there, when a child has reached the state in life, literally or figuratively of "Avi v'Emi azavuni". Only the recognition that "HaShem Ya-asfeini" (G-d will gather me in) can redeem the child from the accompanying sense of fear and abandonment.

What you probably do not realize at this time in your lives, certainly not to the extent that G-d willing you one day will, is that the trauma associated with the phenomenon of "ki Avi v'Emi azavuni" is not only sensed from the perspective of the children. There can be equal, if not greater, trauma felt by the parents at confronting this same phenomenon from their perspective.

Nothing makes a loving parent happier than to be in the presence of their children – to provide for their needs, to "catch them" when they might fall, and to comfort them when they might get hurt. A parent does this out of altruistic love, without expecting

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anything in return, simply because being able to help their children gives the parents a sense of satisfaction and indeed a sense of security.

Inevitably, however, there comes a point in the children's lives – and in the parents' lives – when they can no longer always provide for all the needs of their children. Recognition of this phenomenon is traumatic for the parents as well.

It has been and continues to be a sense of trauma and anxiety for me as each of my children grows up and moves out of the house and on with their lives, moving on to needs and to risks about which I can no longer say with certainty "I will always be there to catch you if you fall". G-d willing, one day each of you will reach this stage in your own lives with your own children and realize more fully the emotions of which "the old King David" is speaking.

The word "Azavani" in the verse in Tehillim does not have to be understood (as many translations have it) as "abandonment". It is not so much a question of parents willfully abandoning children or children willfully abandoning parents. It is "a parting of ways" which is a normal and healthy phenomenon -- a sign of maturity -- and part of the natural process of transition of generations. But it is a phenomenon, nevertheless, which brings anxiety and anguish to both sides of the "dor holech v'dor bah" continuum. Both sides of that continuum need to be comforted and consoled by the knowledge that "Hashem Ya'Asfeinu": G-d will somehow see to it that the children survive with minimal involvement of their parents; and He will likewise see to it that the parents survive without being able to control or guarantee the course of the lives of their children.

When we see tragedy, such as we've seen, we appreciate more than ever how much we have to be thankful for. We appreciate more than ever that we should not take our blessings – or our loved ones – for granted.

I take this opportunity to let each of you know how much I love you and your families and how proud I am of the decisions you have made and the paths you have taken in your lives thus far. (Like Dr. Edith Luchins, I anxiously wait to see how each of you will "turn out" in the end.) I further take this opportunity to let you all know that you are foremost in my mind when I pray to G-d that we should all be blessed with a Year of Life – including all the blessings implied by the term "Chayim".

May it be a year of Simchos and Shalom for our family and for Klal Yisroel. May we see fulfillment of the Gemara [Rosh Hashannah 16b] "Every year in which we are humbled at the start of the year will bring prosperity by the end of the year…"

Love to each of you,

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May You See Children Born To Your Children, Peace on IsraelOctober, 2002 [Tehillim 128:6]

Alex and Chani, I would very much like to fulfill "Lech Lecha Me'Artzecha U'Meemoladetecha U'M'Beis Avicha el Ha'Aretz…" in a literal sense this year, this week. But unfortunately as in the past, we will have to fulfill it "b'geder U'Neshalma parim sefaseinu". I just want to let you know that – despite the distance that separates us – what a special milestone this event is in my life and (as if you don't realize it) what a special milestone this is in your own lives.

First of all the sixth grandchild is a special milestone for Ema and myself because we now have more grandchildren than children! This officially solidifies our status as "more grandparents" than "parents". It is a wonderful status to have achieved and I want to take this opportunity to thank all my children and children-in-law who have done so much to make that change in our status possible. Keep up the good work

Second this is a special milestone because it is my first male Twersky grandchild. Aside from now having someone to be next-in-line for the position of Tolner Rebbe after Mordy, I now have a descendant about whom the Vilna Gaon would agree that I can say "Bnei banim harei hem k"banim". The Gaon holds that this concept only applies to grandchildren who are sons of sons.

Finally this is a special milestone because each child and each grandchild is very special and very precious in their own right. As I wrote when Ashira was born, we view with special significance the fact that members of our family are once again being born in Eretz Yisroel after having so many centuries being born in the various countries of the Diaspora.

* * *Alex, your son was born on the day of the reading of Parshas Noach. At the end of Parshas Noach we have the tracing of the ten generations between Noach and Avraham. The format of the Torah's narration parallels very closely the chronology presented at the end of Parshas Bereshis where we have a listing of the ten generations between Adam and Noach.

There is a very interesting phenomenon here which I think is worthy of calling to your attention at this time. Look for example at the beginning of the genealogical list [11:10]. "These are the descendants of Shem: Shem was 100 years old when he begot Arpachshad, two years after the flood. And Shem lived 500 years after begetting Arpachshad, and he begot sons and daughters." Each of the generations follows exactly the same pattern: "X was v years old when he begot Y and X lived w years after begetting Y and he begot sons and daughters."

What is clearly striking about this pattern is that the bechor, the first born son is clearly the focus of the whole life description of the father. The bechor is the only child mentioned by name – all the other children are simply anonymous "also borns".

As Mordy mentioned at the start of his Bar Mitzvah drasha, we know that many times in Tanach the bechor is not such a hero. On the contrary, it is precisely the younger sibling who often gets the better bracha or is described as being the more praise-worthy personality. But nevertheless, I think there is a lesson to be learned by the genealogies presented at the end of Bereshis and Noach.

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The nature of things is that parents often have the most time, patience, and sense of youthful attachment with their oldest child. These factors team up to give parents vis a vis their oldest child kochos and emotions that they might not be able to fully summon up for later children. [Refer to the Ramba"n's comments on why Yitzchok favored Eisav over Yakov – this even though they were twins!].

If parents demonstrate – as a result of these natural tendencies – favoritism towards the oldest child in the presence of the younger siblings, then obviously they are asking for resentment and trouble [Shabbos 10b].

But if parents have Siyata D'Ishmaya these natural tendencies to excessively dote over their oldest child, to give them their undivided love and attention, to invest in him or her all their kochos may in fact pay rich dividends. Rather than being a detrimental factor in the growth and development of the younger siblings, this special treatment afforded to the bechor may actually benefit the younger siblings.

If the Siyata D'Ishmaya is there, then that carefully nurtured Bechor may turn out not to be a rival or a source of jealousy for his younger siblings – he may be a role model for his younger siblings, someone who may ultimately be able to be a bigger influence on the goals and life-outlooks of those younger siblings than even were able to be their own parents.

Alex, you are well aware of the phenomenon of which I speak from the dynamics of our own family and from the leadership role that your brother Moshe played in blazing the trail – especially for you and in a sense for all your siblings – in many key ways that he was able to do "as a member of your own generation" and which was less feasible for Ema and myself as members of the "older generation". [Ayen my remarks in N.J.S. – Alex's Ufruf Shabbos]

Alex and Chani you have a great opportunity before you – to raise a bechor! To implant in a first born child all the love and all the kochos and all the time and attention that can only be given to a bechor. Certainly for now, this bechor is the focus of your whole life description and to some extent this phenomenon will remain true regardless of how many years you are zoche to live after begetting "Y" and regardless of how many "banim u'banos" you will yet be zoche to beget into this world..

It is my Tefillah and Bracha to you that you will be blessed with the same Siyata D'Ismaya in raising your Bechor that your parents were blessed with in raising their Bechor. May he grow up to be a Ben Torah who will be looked up to and be seen as a role model and a source of inspiration by all his siblings.

It seems like just yesterday I was darshening to you the beginning of the pasuk "Al ken ya-azov ish es aviv v'es imo" [Bereshis 2:24] and now we are already zoche to see the fulfillment of the end of the pasuk "v'hayu l'basar echad" which as Rashi says refers to "havlad notzar al yedei shneihem, v'sham na'aseh besaram echad." (the child created through the two of them and there their flesh becomes one). May it be G-d's Will that just as we have been zoche to witness and to darshen the beginning of the verse "u'r-ay banim l'banecha…" (May you see children born to your children) so too may we be zoche to see speedily the fulfillment of the end of the verse "…Shalom al Yisroel" (Peace on Israel).

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Seven Blessings On Your Head

-Mazal Tov !Mazal Tov !

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Sheva Brochos of Aliza Tatel And Zvi MerzelAugust 2001

Good Shabbos everyone. I want to thank Chaim and Leah Tatel for inviting me to participate with them in this Simcha of the week of Sheva Brochos in honor of the marriage of their daughter Aliza to Zvi Merzel and for inviting me to share with you a few short words of Torah U'Bracha on this happy occasion.

This week's parsha introduces the concept of Sechar V'Onesh in very definitive language – keeping the Mitzvos or not keeping them is the difference between Beracha and Kelalah, blessing and curse. Reward and punishment is one of the basic concepts of Jewish belief and indeed is codified by the Ramba"m as one of the cardinal principles of faith. Reward comes both in material terms as spelled out in many places in Sefer Devarim as well as in spiritual terms as in the concept of Mitzvah Goreres Mitzvah. We find this latter idea mentioned by Chazal already in Sefer Bereshis. The Rabbis tell us that in the merit of "VaYikach Shem v'Yefes es haSimlah" (And Shem and Yefes took the garment to cover the nakedness of their father Noah), the descendants of Shem merited the "Talis" the garment with which the Mitzvah of Tzitsis would be fulfilled. In a similar vein, Chazal comment that the fringes of those Tzisis were merited by Avraham for saying "Im M'Chut v'ad Seroch Na'al" – for refusing to take even a thread even a shoe-lace from the spoil of the war against K'DarLaomer and his allies. It is rare that you can come to a Sheva Brochos and say that you have known the father of the Kallah for Sheva Shmitah cycles, but that is almost how long I've known Chaim Tatel. When it comes to Torah, v'Avodah, u'Gemillas Chassadim - the three pillars of the world – Chaim has long been a Jack of all trades and a pillar of our community. There are many many areas within Seattle's Jewish life where Chaim makes a major contribution to the Kehilla, but in most of these areas he has, Baruch HaShem, at least some competition – he is b'geder "a man amongst men". But there is one mitzvah, where Chaim really has always stood out in this community not b'geder "a man amongst men", but literally b'geder "b'makom she'ayn ish" – he has been an invaluable and irreplaceable resource. That is in regards the Mitzvah of Shatnez testing. If Shem received spiritual reward Midah k'neged Midah for the "Simlah" the garment, and Avram received spiritual reward Midah k'neged Midah for the "Chut", the thread, then I believe it is only natural to expect that Chaim who for decades has been the Yachid b'Iro (the only one in his city) to occupy himself with this Mitzvah involving both Simlah and Chuttim, both garments and threads – should receive from haKadosh Baruch hu, the appropriate spiritual reward, Midah k'neged Midah.

But what is the appropriate spiritual reward, Midah k'neged Midah for the Mitzvah of Shatnez? Of course, Shatnez testing involves checking for appropriate "Zivugim", you can have linen mixed with polyester and linen mixed with cotton and cotton mixed with wool and wool mixed with polyester – all these are appropriate Zivugim, appropriate pairings. Only Linen and Wool is a Zivug which is looked on with disfavor by halacha.. But of course we know that a garment blended from appropriate materials is a metaphor in Tanach for marriage. "u'farasta k'nafecha al amascha…" [Ruth 3:9]. So then what more appropriate meedah k'neged meedah reward could there be for a Shatnez tester than to be zocheh to such fine Zivugim – first for himself with his Eishes Chayil, Leah, and now in quick succession for his two daughters – Alisa and Tova. I had the privilege to host both Chassanim, Zvi and Sheeya, in my home when they first came to Seattle. They are both Bnei Torah in the finest sense of the word and they merited two of the most eidel most chessed oriented girls that Seattle has ever produced.

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There is at least one other Mitzvah in this community with which Chaim has been uniquely instrumental in its establishment. That is the Mitzvah of Eruv. Without his hard work getting the project off the ground and checking the Eruv each week – together with his daughters -- for so many of those crucial initial years, we would certainly not have an Eruv in Seward Park. In the merit of his involvement in Eruv, he has also been rewarded Meedah k'Neged Meedah in that I am able to speak at his daughter's Seudah Shlishis / Sheva Brochos. Inasmuch, as I never speak without notes and without the Eruv, I could not have brought my notes here – this too, perhaps, is b'geder Sechar Meedah k'neged Meedah.

I just want to conclude with a Beracha to the Chosson and Kallah from the opening words of this morning's Parsha: Re'eh Anochi Nosen Lifneichem HaYom. The commentaries discuss the unique grammatical structure of this verse. The word Re'eh is Lashon Yachid, singular (the Torah says Re'eh not Re'u). The word Lifneichem, on the other hand, is Lashon Rabim, plural (the Torah does not say l'fanecha). This appears to be grammatically incorrect. A number of meforshim give different answers to this question, al pi Derush.

But for you, Tzvi and Aliza these words "Re'eh Anochi Nosen Lifneichem haYom" – on this Yom, do have very special meaning. You are -- at this beautiful time in your lives -- moving from Lashon Yachid to Lashon Rabim. Until now you could be thinking about your plans, your aspirations, your needs, and your wants in terms of Lashon Yachid: "I", "Me", "Myself". From this week forward you need to move your thought process and your speech vocabulary from Lashon Yachid to Lashon Rabim -- "We", "us", "ourselves". May together you (plural) build a Bayis Ne'eman which will have in it only Beracha, in fulfillment of the second verse of the Parsha… "Es HaBracha, asher Tishm'oo el Mitzvos HaShem Elokeichem asher Anochi Metaveh eschem haYom": (The Blessing that you listen to the commandments of Hashem, your G-d that I command you today.) Listening to the commandments is itself the Beracha, because it will lead inevitably to material and spiritual reward.

May HaKadosh Baruch Hu grant the two of you together, Aliza and Tzvi, Sechar, Medah k'neged Medah for all the Mitzvos you have done individually, b'Geder Re'eh Anochi, to this point in your lives. And may, from now on, the two of you together begin accumulating Sechar collectively, b'Geder "Lifneichem haYom" which should be credited to yourselves as a family unit and to future righteous Banim u'Banos which you should bring into this world.

Mazal Tov and Good Shabbos.

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Sheva Brochos of Tova (Tatel) and Shiya PortowitzNovember 18, 2001

I believe Leah Tatel asked me to speak this afternoon for three reasons. First, Tova the Kallah, was my daughter's roommate at the Beis Yaakov in Denver – so she knew I would have no problem finding good things to say about Tova. Second, Shiya was my house guest this past summer for a brief time when he game to Seattle to meet Tova's parents, so she knew I would have no problem finding good things to say about Shiya. And thirdly, she knew that when I spoke at Aliza's Sheva Brochos just a few short weeks ago, I found good things to say about her and Chaim – so she knew I would be capable in that department as well.

Indeed there is so much similarity between what I said last August about Aliza and Zvi to what I could say this afternoon about Tova and Shiya, that in the immortal words of Yogi Berra, it would be like Déjà vu all over again! And if the praise of Aliza and Zvi is similar to the praise I would say about Tova and Shiya, then Kal v'Chomer what I said about Chaim and Leah in August is virtually identical to what I would say about them today. The "velt" says that nothing is the same after September 11 as it was before September 11. I'm here to disagree – the praises I said then about Chaim and Leah, and about their Kallah daughter and new son-in-law are b'dee'yuk what I say today about Chaim and Leah, and their Kallah daughter and new son-in-law.

For those who were not with us in the Tatels living room for Shalosh Seudos on Parshas Re'eh, ask me later for the URL of my web site, and I will be happy to point you to the remarks I said on that occasion. And you can download them to your word processor and make a global change replacing Aliza and Zvi with Tova and Shiya.

Seriously, marrying off a second daughter within a very short time of marrying off an older daughter is a very special and unique experience. I know first hand. My wife and I were married less than two months after her older sister got married. Same bridal gown, same caterer, same location, same photographer, same menu, same guests from the Kallahs side – only the plates smashed at the Tenaim and the wine glass broken under the Chuppah were different!

But the truth is, that in this week's parsha we also have the well known situation of two sisters getting married in close proximity to one another. Granted Lavan was not as ehrlich a father-in-law as Reb Chaim is, but the two sisters were certainly very akin to Aliza and Tova in that they were nashim Tzidkoniyot who were role models for their family and for future generations.

So because we are celebrating today the Sheva Brochos of a second sister's marriage in close proximity to the marriage of her older sister, I would like to share with you a Dvar Torah related to Leah and Rachel who also got married in close proximity to each other. [Maleh Shevua zos, v'nitna lecha gam es zos – the meforshim all say means "finish off the week of Shivas Yemei HaMishteh and then I will immediately let you marry Rachel]. This thought I saw in Living Each Week by Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski.

We find as the last Pasuk in Perek 29 "And (Leah) conceived again and she bore a son and she said 'This time I will be grateful to G-d' Therefore she called his name Yehudah"… In the very next pasuk, at the start of Perek 30 we find "When Rachel saw that she bore no children to Jacob, Rachel envied her sister". (V'Tereh Rachel ki lo yalda l'Yaakov, vaTekaneh Rachel b'Achosah).

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Rabbi Twerski asks, why was Rachel only jealous of her sister after Yehudah was born. We find no mention of resentment or jealousy following the birth of Reuven, Shimeon, or Levi. He answers by a powerful insight that emerges from an analysis of the text.

He argues that contrary to what one might surmise, Rachel's envy was not aroused by her sister's bearing children. When Leah had her first son and said, "G-d saw my suffering, for now my husband will love me" Rachel did not react. Nor was she affected when the second son was born and Leah said, "G-d heard that I am disliked, and he gave me also this son." Nor when the birth of the third son elicited Leah's statement, "This time my husband will join unto me, for I have borne him three sons."

All these statements were self-directed. However, when the fourth son was born and Leah said, "This time I will be grateful to G-d", Rachel realized that by not having any children she could not achieve the quality of gratitude toward G-d that her sister had attained. It was Leah's spiritual attainment of this great degree of thankfulness – not her fertility – which provoked Rachel and caused her to be envious.

Rabbi Twerski points out that usually envy is a destructive emotion, but nevertheless Chazal tell us that "Kinas Sofrim Tarbeh Chochma" – envy among scholars increases knowledge. Envy for the right reason can stimulate one to a higher degree of learning or a higher degree of spirituality. It is this type of Kinah that Rachel had for her sister. She was not envious of her earthly successes, she was envious and thus stimulated and motivated by her spiritual accomplishments.

Tova had the advantage of having a wonderful role model as an older sister. But the true praise of Tova is that she channeled the natural sibling rivalry and envy that normally exists between a younger sibling and an older sibling into spiritual growth and spiritual accomplishment. She was always determined to match Aliza, mitzvah for mitzvah, chessed for chessed, honor list for honor list and ultimately Chosson for Chosson!

I am tremendously happy for Chaim and Leah to have now in such a short time acquired two such wonderful sons-in-law, outstanding examples of Middos Tovos, of dedication to Torah and to learning.

At the same time, I am well aware that it is somewhat of a bitter-sweet Simcha to marry off children and then see them take off and go live on the other side of the world. Chaim and Leah as well as Tzippy and I are learning to appreciate the appropriateness of the proximity of the Brocha of Mesameach Tzion B'Vaneha with the Brahca of Mesameach Chasan V'Kallah. We will each, IY"H, have two of our children living with their new spouses al Taharas HaKodesh, young Kollel couples in Yerushalayim. It is our Simcha to marry off our children. It is G-d's Simcha and indeed the Simcha of Klal Yisrael – the Eternal entity of the Jewish nation – to have the cream of the crop of their children return to Zion and devote themselves to Torah..

May we soon see the coming of Eliyahu about whom it says "V'hesiv Lev Avos Al Banim"… he will return the parents to the children. May we soon be able to join our children in Eretz Yisroel and may we soon be zoche to only hear the explosive sounds in the streets of Jerusalem and in the cities of Yehudah of wedding jubilance and of youths from their song-filled feasts, kol Mitzhalos Chassanim m'Chupasam u'narim m'mishteh nigeenasam . Mazal Tov.

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Sheva Brochos of Ezra and Aliza GenauerSeptember 7 , 2001

This week’s Parsha contains the section of “Vidui Ma’asros” – literally the “Tithing Confessional”. At the end of the tithing cycle a Jew must carefully inventory what he has accumulated over the past years in his house. If he has any produce that rightly belongs to members of the tribe of Levy that he has not yet given to them, he must seize the opportunity to do so immediately. Only then can he honestly pronounce before G-d the formula of “Vidui Ma’aser” – Biarti haKodesh min Habayis (I have removed the sacred materials from my house).

As you all know, tomorrow night we begin saying Selichos. We are on the threshold of the period of a Vidui Recital. I have taken this opportunity to inventory the speaking material I have accumulated over the past few years and have been asking myself the question – do I have anything in my possession that I owe to a member of the tribe of Levy? In checking my records I find that indeed I have written a Dvar Torah for the occasion of Rami Genauer’s Bar Mitzvah, I have written a Dvar Torah on the occasion of the Sheva Brochos of Ahuva Genauer, but lo and behold I checked and double checked my records and could not find ever having delivered any of my produce to the “First Fruit” of Eli and Eva Genauer’s family, our dear Chosson Ezra.

So I want to sincerely thank Esther and Michael for inviting Tzippy and myself to this Sheva Brochos tonight, and allowing me the opportunity to finally settle my account with a family that I have long considered to be the prototype of “HaLevy asher B’Shearecha” when it comes to community service and when it comes to assisting in the Avodah in the Battei Mikdash of our Kehillah. I have many fond memories of Ezra playing with my son Moshe when they were growing up. Since we were neighbors on Holly Street for a number of years and our boys were close in age, Ezra was not only “HaLevy asher B’Sherecha”, he was very often “HaLevy asher B’Veisecha u’viSherecha”. Ezra and Moshe did a number of creative things together, but one of the most memorable things they ever did was a performance they gave at a BCMH Talent Show contest one Chanukah for which they won first prize. It was a take-off on the famous Abbott and Costello “Who’s On First” routine. Ezra played the role of Gabbai Rishon and my son Moshe played the role of Gabbai Sheini. They were reviewing the list of Kibbudim being given out the next Shabbos. Ezra was trying to explain to Moshe that “Who” got Shlishi, and “What” got “Revii”, and “I Don’t Know” got Chamishi, and so forth. Moshe of course was getting terribly confused as Ezra tried to explain the Kibbudim and after about a five minute routine that had everyone rolling in the aisles, Moshe in frustration gave up trying to figure it out and yelled “I-Don’t-Give-A-Damn”. To which Ezra responded “He gets Hagbah!”

You are probably asking yourselves, what does this recollection of the “Who Got Shlishi” routine have to do with this week’s Parsha? There is a connection. And it’s not just that David Damn is scheduled to get Hagbah tomorrow! You see what makes comedy of this nature successful, and what made Ezra’s performance that night so hilarious was his sense of timing. Everyone knew the basic shtick of the Abbott and Costello routine, but Ezra’s sense of timing in delivering the anticipated lines at just the right moment, was really what carried the performance and gave it maximum impact.

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But that observation ties in perfectly with a teaching of Chazal about Ezra’s sense of timing which is directly related to our Parsha. Our sages teach that Ezra enacted the timing of the reading of the two Parshiyos in Chumash which contain Tochacha. Ezra divided up the Chumash into the Parsha readings as we know them and he enacted that the two sections of Curses be read at specific times in the year to give them maximum impact! As the Gemara in Megillah 32b states

רמוא רזעלא ןב ןועמש 'ר אינתארזע ןקיתה"ר םדוק הרות הנשמבשו תרצע םדוק םינהכ תרותבש תוללק ןירוק והיש לארשיל ןהל

The Gemara goes on there to state a reason why this is so…רמא אמעט יאמ

היתוללקו הנשה הלכתש ידכ שיקל שיר אמיתיאו ייבא

The Gemara then asks that this should apply only to the Curses in Ki Tavo, which comes out before Rosh HaShannah, but not to the curses in Bechukotai which comes out before Shavuos and the Gemara answers that in a sense Shavuos too is like a New Year because we learned in the Mishneh in Rosh HaShannah that on Shavuos there is judgement over the Fruits of the Trees.

Rav Soloveitchik, zt"l, once explained the reason for this enactment of Ezra from a different perspective. The Gemara in Megillah started from the perspective that we wanted to get rid of the curses in the old year and start the new year with a clean slate. Therefore the reading of the curses in Ki Tavo was simple because it comes before Rosh HaShannah and the Gemara needed to find out in what sense Shavuos is like Rosh HaShannah which would explain why we have a Tochacha in Bechukosai.

The Rav said that it makes sense that the Tochacha should be read before Kabalas HaTorah – because it is a warning what will happen if we do not observe the statutes of the Torah which we are now being given. So the Tochacha in Bechukosai before Shavuos is the obvious starting point. The reason we read Tochacha in Ki Tavo is because it comes before the New Year season which includes Yom Kippur. Although we usually do not think of it in terms of Zeman Matan Toraseinu, Yom Kippur was the date Moshe brought down the second set of Luchos from Har Sinai – therefore it too is a day of Kabalas HaTorah and a Tochacha warning about observance of the Torah is most appropriate immediately before Yom Kippur.

So now we know the connection between Ezra Genauer's timing of his lines in the "Who Gets Shlishi" routine and the Parshas HaShavua which was timed to fall out exactly at this time of year by Ezra HaSofer..

But what is the connection between the Tochacha in Ki Tavo and Sheva Brochos? For this we need to quote a Chiddushei HaRim. The Chiddushei HaRim makes a correlation between the 98 curses that we find in Parshas Ki Tavo and the 98 blessings that a couple has the opportunity to hear during the week of Sheva Brochos. If you multiply 7 blessings per meal times two meals a day times 7 days in the week you get 98!

The 98 blessings of Sheva Brochos serve as an antidote to counteract the 98 curses of the Tochacha. In other words the world can be a harsh and terrifying place, but with a strong marriage rooted in Kedusha and in blessing, the young couple can feel fortified and confident that they will be able to face together – with G-d's help -- any challenges that life brings them.

In conclusion, I know that Ezra is into accounting and bookkeeping and I'm sure he's going to be worried that maybe he didn't have 14 meals at which Sheva Brochos were recited this past

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week and so he didn't accumulate the quota of 98 Brochos needed to counter act all the Curses of the Tochacha. To put your mind at ease, Ezra, I offer you the following calculation: "Ben Levi" is B'Gematria also equal to 98.

The whole reason for the 98 curses was "V'haya im lo tishma b'kol Hashem Elokecha lishmor l'asos es kol mitzvosov v'chukosav…" But the Bnei Levi, throughout our history, were always the ones who were meticulously faithful to observe all the commands of the Torah. So my Bracha to you and your wife is that you should form on your own a faithful Mishpachas Levi, walking in the footsteps of your ancestors – both your immediate and your distant ancestors – and may that Zechus alone serve as your antidote and protection from any and all of the curses of the Tochacha. That will G-d willing give you a surplus of all the Sheva Brochos you have received and will be receiving this week as strictly icing on the

cake. May you find in your life together fulfillment of the words in the Parsha -- ךגישהו הלאה תוכרבה-לכ ךילע ואבוMay all these blessings come upon the two of you and "overtake you". The Kotzker Rebbe says the expression "V'Heeseegucha" comes from the root word "hasagah" – challenge (as in HaSagas haRava"d). HaShem blesses us with Health and with Good Fortune and he challenges us to make proper use of these blessings to fulfill His Will. May you receive all these blessings and live up to the challenge by building a Bayis Ne'eman b'Yisrael. Mazal Tov to Ezra and Aliza. Mazal Tov to the parents and to the grandparents and to the entire family.

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Sheva Brochos of Yishai and Saree SwigardDecember 7, 2002

First of all, I want to wish Mazal Tov to the Chosson and Kallah, Yishai and Saree Swigard and hope that they be zoche to build a Bayis Ne'eman b'Yisrael. Second I want to wish Mazal Tov to our good friends, Kent and Nancy Swigard and hope they continue to be zoche to sell many Batim ne'emanim b'Seattle. Finally, Mazal Tov to the Parents of the Kallah and to all the assembled friends and relatives and hope that we may all be zoche to have a little Menuchas Shabbos yet this afternoon. With that thought in mind, I promise to be brief.

This bli ayin Hara is the fifth Sheva Brochos within less than 5 years that I am speaking to a young Chosson-Kallah, children of American parents who are about to begin their married life as Kollel couples, living in Yerushalayim, immersed in Torah study and a Torah life-style al Taharas HaKodesh.

As I said on a previous occasion, parents of such young couples learn to appreciate the appropriateness of the proximity of the Brocha of Mesameach Tzion B'Vaneha (who rejoices Zion with her children) with the Brahca of Mesameach Chasan V'Kallah (who rejoices the Groom and Bride). It is the parents' Simcha to marry off their children and it is the children's Simcha to be married to each other. It is G-d's Simcha and indeed the Simcha of Klal Yisrael – the Eternal entity of the Jewish nation – to have the cream of the crop of their children return to Zion and devote themselves to Torah..

I just want to share a brief Torah thought on the Parsha from my "Rabbi Frand archives", which perhaps has some relevance to the occasion.

Our Parsha begins with the words, Vayehi Miketz shenatayim Yamim "And it was two years later…." At the end of last week's Parsha, Rash"i quotes a Medrash that says that because Yosef put his trust in the Butler, by asking him to put in a good word for him with Pharaoh, Yosef was punished. For the two words he spoke -- "u'zchartani, v'hotzaisani" (and remember me and take me out), Yosef's stay in jail was extended for two more years. Rash"i alludes to a very enigmatic Medrash which references the verse in Tehillim "Ashrei haGever asher sam Hashem mivtacho, v'lo panah el rehavim v'satei chazav": "'Happy is the man who places his trust in G-d...' -- this, the Medrash says, refers to Yosef; '...and turned not to the arrogant and to strayers after falsehood' – this alludes to the fact that Yosef's sentence in jail was extended for two years because of the two words he said to the butler."

This Medrash seems to contain an internal contradiction. At first it singles out Yosef as the prime example of a person who places his trust in G-d. Then it turns around and says, because he asked the butler to put in a good word for him and did not trust G-d sufficiently, he was punished with two extra years in jail.

There are, however, those who differ with Rashi and understand that the two year prison extension was not a punishment. Yosef did no sin in asking for the butler's intervention. What we have here can be called 'the natural consequences of a person's actions.'

This means as follows: If one wants to conduct himself with G-d in a manner that rises above nature (l'maale m'derech haTeva), and this is how the person always conducts himself with G-d, then G-d will respond to him in the same way. But if one lives his life according to the way of nature (which is indeed the approach of most people), then G-d's response to him will also be according to the way of nature.

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The Baal Shem Tov offers a beautiful parable to illustrate this concept. It says in Tehillim HaShem Tzilcha al yad Yeminecha "G-d is your shadow next to your right hand." The Baal Shem Tov explains the metaphor. When one raises his hand, one's shadow raises its hand. When one jumps, the shadow jumps. When one goes fast, the shadow goes fast. The relationship a person has with G-d is like that of a shadow. However one conducts himself with Him is reciprocal. That is how G-d will conduct Himself with the person. If one conducts himself in such a manner that he places all his trust in G-d, there will be a reciprocal relationship -- that trust will be well placed. But if one conducts himself through "normal channels," the conduct of normal human beings, then that is how G-d will conduct Himself with the person.

The reason Yosef had to spend the extra two years in jail was not a punishment. Rather, by virtue of the fact that Yosef went through the channels of normal human beings, and asked the Butler to intervene for him with Pharaoh, G-d allowed nature to take its course. It is quite natural that if one asks a person to do a favor, the person forgets about the favor and remembers two years later.

I say this Dvar Torah perhaps has some relevance to this occasion and to similar occasions that I have spoken at in the past because the truth of the matter is that a young couple beginning life as a Kollel couple in Jerusalem, is very much living an existence that is l'maaleh m'derech haTeva (at a physical and spiritual level that is on a higher plane that that of normal, natural existence).

Frankly, many if not most American parents of my generation are for all their observance and all their religious commitment very prepared – as Yosef was – to engage in Hishtadlus and to live their own lives based on derech HaTeva in exerting human effort to achieve their goals and their aspirations in the normal way of the world, if you will. Of course, everything we achieve is B'Ezras HaShem – with the Help of G-d, but it is Ezras HaShem that comes b'derech haTeva.

Frankly, we are not on the spiritual level of our children. Even when we discount the idealism and perhaps naiveté of youth, we were not on their level when we were their age! Yishai and Saree and the ken Yirbu thousands of young Kollel couples like them who chose to begin married life plugged into a level of existence that is l'ma'aleh m'derech haTeva, beyond the plane of the normal existence – are walking in the path of the verse of Tehillim Ashrei haGever asher sam Hashem mivtacho (Happy is the person who places his trust in G-d). May they also be zoche to experience the complimentary verse in Tehillim HaShem Tzilcha al yad Yeminecha (G-d is your shadow by your right hand)

May we all soon see the coming of Eliyahu about whom it says "V'hesiv Lev Avos Al Banim"… he will synchronize the hearts of the parents with that of the children. May we soon be able to join our children in Eretz Yisroel, to share their lifestyle al Taharas HaKodesh and may we soon be zoche to only hear the explosive sounds in the streets of Jerusalem and in the cities of Yehudah of wedding jubilance and of youths from their song-filled feasts, kol Mitzhalos Chassanim m'Chupasam u'narim m'mishteh nigeenasam . Mazal Tov.

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David Twersky:

The Lost Episodes

(Speeches fromthe 1970s)

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YU Freshman Shabbos 1970: The Limits of Freedom of ChoiceSeptember 1970

We are now in the month of Elul, a time which Jews have traditionally set aside as a time for introspection and preparation for the rependtence of Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. I am not referring to the standard preparations of taking one's suit to the cleaner, buying a ticket for your seat in shul, etc. Elul is a time for the analyzing of our thoughts, our actions, and the direction upon which we are headed during the coming year. This being the beginning of the school year, and especially, for freshmen the beginning of a whole new experience – one which will without a doubt be crucial in forming your entire outlook and values for the rest of your lives – it is all the more important that we begin with an understanding and a sense of direction in where we are headed and where we should be headed.

Chazal, our Sages, tell us that the battle of one's conscience – the battle between the yetzer hatov and the yetzer haraw is comparable to the battle between two opposing armies. The confrontation begins on a battle field – on one side of the battle lines is the territory of one army and on the other side is the territory of the other army.

The territory that is far gehind one's battle lines is at the first clash not vulnerable at all to the opposing armies attack. The entire contest takes place at the front. If after the first clash one side is victorious, focing a retreat of the second army, then the next time the opposing forces meet, the previous war zone will be safely on the side of the vicotros and the new battle ground will be on territory which was formerly held by the other army. That is, the physical battle will take place at any one time in only a certain spot. However, potentially, all the territory of both nations may eventually come under the control of one of the armies.

Chazal say it is the same way with the battle between the Yezer Hatov and the Yezer haraw within a person. During any given period during a person's life a certain percentage of his actions will be governed by his inclination to do what is right and a certain percentage of his actions will be governed by his inclination to do what is wrong. Those actions, both right and wrong, he does without thikning. There is no struggle of conscience whether he should or should not do an action which is safely within the territory of the Yetzer Hatov or the Yezer haraw. Then there is the battle front – between the territory solidly controlled by those opposing inclinations. There comes the decisions and actions about which he must struggle with his conscience and with his inclinations, and depending on the repeated outcome of such struggles, over a period of time, the decision or coursed of action taken will eventually become habit and will fall into the controlled territory of one or the other spiritual armies.

To give an example – you may have one fellow who is a tremendous Tzadik, very righteous in all his actions. For him the battle between the Yetzer HaTov and the Yetzer HaRaw will take place at a very high level – to sleep late and miss davening for him would be out of the question, the mitzvah of davening with a minyan for him is safely in the territory of the Yetzer Hatov. He may have to struggle with his incllination to daven with more kavonah – with deeper deciation and meaning.

On the other extreme there are individuals who will think nothing of stealing from his neighbor, embezzling from his business, etc. For him these actions are safely within the territory of the Yetzer Haraw. He doesn't even feel guilty about such actions. Where he may have tostruggle with his conscience is when it comes to murder – to much of his actions are governed by his Yetzer Haraw that only at the point of murder does his Yetzer HaTov have enough power to challenge his Yetzer Haraw.

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What it boils down to is that it is true that a person has bechira chofshis, which means the power to chose between good and evil, right and wrong. But his choice is in a certain sense limited to his personal, inner battle front. The level at which this battle front exists depends on many factors, not all of which are within a person's control. First it depends upon a person's background, his family, education, and friends. Such factors do much to determine what values and actions a person accepts as being common and most natural – be it stealing or be it giving charity, be it filling one's speech with obscenities or filling one's speech with Divrei Torah.

A second factor in determining one's battle front is the result of previous battles – just as one army can advance and take over the territory held by the other side, so too regardless of one's background, based on previous victories on his earlier battle fronts, one can work his way up to gain more territory for his positive inclination by doing what his conscience tells him is right, winning the battles with his Yetzer Haraw, and in this way overcome any advantage his previous surroundings gave to his negative inclination.

To bring what I'm saying a little closer to home, we have here in this room boys from very varied backgrounds – some from Yeshiva high schools, some from Hebrew high schools, some from Public high schools. Some come from cities with large Jewish populations who have many Jewish friends, some from cities with almost no Jewish population, with no Jewish friends. Some are from homes where they could experience a Shabbos atmosphere and some are from homes where there is no such atmosphere.

What we all do have in common is our own personal battle front and the ability – and freedom of choice – to move that battle field up to a higher level, proclaiming victory for our Yetzer Hatov or to G-d forbid let it slip down to a lower level with victory for the Yetzer Haraw.

In pirkei Avot it is taught Mitzvah Goreres Mitzvah – one good deed leads to another. For if we get used to being victorious over one area, controlled by the evil inclination, if we succeed in curing ourselves of one bad habit, that habit will no longer plauge us and we may move on to improve ourselves in other areas. The corollary is that Averah Goreres averah. If one chooses to let his evil inclination win now in an area where he must currently struggle to do what is right, then he must fully realize the direction in which he is heading. The battle ground does not stay in one place.

The Gemarah says: When a person submits to his evil inclination and commits a sin, once and then repeats it a second time, he considers it already to be for him entirely pemissible. That territory will be captured by the Yetzer Haraw which will then proceed to confront the Yetzer Hatov on new territory which previously was securely under control.

I will end by saying that this process of moving the battle front up or down is a very subtl one. If you don't stop to analyze your actions, decisions, and direction you are headed, you might not feel it happening at all. But four years from now when you look back, contrasting yourself from the way you will be then to the way you are now, you will be surprised at the change. I hope that four years from now we will all be able to say that we moved our battle fronts higher during this period and that this Elul will be a beginning for a new dedication and a new striving to win our personal battles and gain a higher and new relationship to our Creator and the world around us.

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JSS Kollel ShabbosOctober 1970

I find it very appropriate that the Shabbos dedicated to the JSS Kollel should be held during those weeks of the year in which we read from the Torah the events of the life of our founding father – Avraham Avinu. After all, the life of Avraham is quite similar to that of what I would like to call a "typical JSS success story". The Rambam describes the spiritual development of Avraham: {Hilchos Avodas Kochavim 1: 1-3}.

What we see here is a case of a boy who came from a non-religious home; he sensed an insufficiency in the religious guidance he had received at home and a deficiency in the entire set of religious values and attitudes of the society of which he was a part. Whether it was through participation in an Ur Kasdim regional seminar or convention I'm not exactly sure; but somehow Avram saw the light. He was mature enough to renounce the accepted beliefs and practices of those around him and to commit himself to learning and teaching the ways of his true Creator. He was prepared to leave his land, his birthplace, and his parents home, to put himself in a new atmosphere that of "the Land I will show you" – to begin life anew in the Kedusha of Eretz Yisrael.

Now when Avraham came to Eretz Yisroel to begin his new life, he was not the only entering freshman. He and Sarai took in with them a large class including "all the souls that they made in Haran" and also including Avram's nephew Lot. Now Lot was a border line case, when he applied for admission to Eretz Yisroel together with Avram and the others. The Office of Admissions reviewed his records and was in doubt whether to accept him or not. Certain administrators felt that he was only coming in with Avram to achieve wealth – knowing that G-d had promised Avram that he would prosper and figuring that he was the next of kin to the childless Avram, he expected to inherit him. Other administrators felt that Lot should be given a chance – leaving him back in Choron or Ur Kasdim he would certainly be influenced by the idolaters. On the other hand there was the hope that if he were admitted, Avram would be a good influence on him. He would learn from Avram's midos how to be hospitable, he would follow the mitzvos Avram taught him like eating matzo on Pessach and so forth. The more lenient policy prevailed in the Office of Admissions and Lot was admitted.

At first things worked out well. Lit vindicated the trust placed in him by passing up an opportunity to inherit all of Avram's wealth by not revealing to Pharoah that Avram was really the husband, not the brother of Sarai, thereby saving Avram's life. However before long there were fights between the shepherds of Lot and the shepherds of Avram. The differences between Avram and Lot became apparent and they went their separate ways. "Vayipardu ish me'al achiv. Avram yashav b'Eretz Canaan; v'Lot yashav b'arei ha'kikar; va-ye-e-hal ad Sdom". Avram remained in the Beis Medrash and Lot went down to the BIMS.

As time went on, each continued on his own course. Avram passed test after test to receive his HA degree – having his name changed from Avram to AvraHAm, he circumcised himself and his son, entering into a covenant with G_d and truly went from level to level, always getting closer to G-d.

Lot, on the other hand, also continued on his course. He established himself in the metropolis of Sodom, the original Fun City, and took part quite actively in the goings on of the local scene. So much so, that when the Angels finally came to Sodom to bring news of the impending disaster, they found that Lot had become a member of the Student Council there.

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"V'Lot yoshev b'shaar S'dom" – Chazal say that just that day he had been appointed Chief Justice of Sodom. The Angels were actually the advisors from Lot's Religious Division. They had come to issue him a stern warning: "Heemalet al nafshecha; al tabeet acharecha v'al ta-amod b'chol hakikar; ha-hara heemalet pen tisafeh". You must save your soul by departing immediately from the wickedness which is about to be destroyed and return "ha-hara" (to the mountain) – which Rashi explains is where Avraham was – a return to the environment of Avraham.

Lot's response is peculiar [Bereshis 19:19] "Thank you very much for your kind warning, but please don't make me go back to the mountain where Avraham is, lest the evil overtake me and I die". On this response of Lot, Rashi quotes a most interesting Medrash, explaining Lot's rationale:

Lot realized that if one desires to put himself into a community, into an atmosphere of a higher spiritual order than that which he is used to, then he is no longer a free-agent. He will

no longer be judged by the standards of Ur Kasdim or the morals of Sodom, or those of wherever else he has come from. He will now be judged by the standards of Avraham. If he is prepared to live up to these standards, even if they are above those which he may be used

to, then he will fit in with that atmosphere and be elevated by it. However, if he thinks he can move from Sodom to "the mountain" as a free agent, making a geographical change without

attempting any corresponding spiritual redirection, then let him know that this is not possible. Lot who was not prepared to mend his ways and strive for the ideals of Avraham realized that

"I am not able to escape to the mountain".

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Depart From Evil and Do GoodOctober 1971

The first Mishneh in the second perek of Avoth begins "Rebbe says: What is the proper path a man should choose for himself? (she-yavor lo ha'adam)" The meforshim comment on the use of the word yavor meaning choose. In Hebrew there are two words which indicate choosing. One is the word livchor and one is the word livror. The difference between the two is that bachar is used to indicate choosing the good from the bad as in the phrase "asher bachar banu m'kol ha-amim" or as in the phrase "u'bacharta b'chaim". The shoresh of baror is used in the reverse case – in picking out the bad from the good as in the prohibition of bereira on Shabbos. The commentaries on this Mishneh point out that in choosing a derech yeshara – a proper path – one must be borrer: He must first remove himself from the improper behavior and actions and then, after picking out the bad, he will be able to attempt to find the proper path. This is the idea of Sur m'rah (depart from evil), v'aseh tov (and do good)". First one must be a "sur m'rah" (removed from evil), and then he can reach the level of "aseh tov" (doing good).

The Torah in the narration of the lives of the Avoth, presents not only a historical account of the actions and deeds of our Patriarchs, but primarily the Torah wishes to teach us midos (ethics) and give us mussar (lessons) that we may apply to our own lives. We are told of the Chessed (kindness), Emunah (faith), Temimus (wholesomeness), Anivus (modesty) of our forefathers in order that they may act as examples and models for us and in order that we may try to emulate their actions.

It is therefore quite proper, in keeping with the principle of Sur m'rah v'aseh tov that prior to setting before us examples of the proper path to choose, we are introduced to the opposite end of the spectrum. Before reading Parshas Lech Lecha, the commencement of the narration of the lives of the Avoth, we read Parshas Noach in which the Torah presents two examples of behavior one should be careful not to emulate.

The two examples of patterns of life which one should not emulate are the society of the Dor HaMabul (the generation of the flood) and that of the Dor Haflagah (the generation of the dispersion). I realize that perhaps not everyone here is familiar with the characteristics of these two ancient civilizations, so for the benefit of those JSS freshmen who are just starting to learn Bereshis and haven't gotten up to Noach yet, and for the benefit of those RIETS students who have never learned Chumash, I will point out the major behavioral patterns of each society. In fact, it will readily become evident that we don't have to go back 4,500 years to understand such societies. The Dor HaMabul and the Dor Haflagah are characteristic of the two alternate courses of action available to a society which has cast aside its subjugation to the Ribono Shel Olam. The Rav, in a Yartzheit drasha a couple of years ago categorized these two civilizations. The Dor HaMabul he called Orgiastic Society and the Dor Haflagah he called Arrogant Society.

I will try to examine each separately and point out their modern counterparts. The Torah says of the Generation of the Flood "And the earth was corrupted before G-d." (VaTishaches ha'Aretz lifnei Hashem). The Gemarah in Sanhedrin points out that whenever we have the language of hashchasa (corruption) used, it always refer to immorality and idolatry. The Torah continues "And G-d saw the earth and behold it was corrupt, for all flesh had corrupted their way upon the earth." The Gemarah elaborates upon their immoral behavior: "This teaches that animal species cross-mated with each other and mankind cross-mated with animal species." In short, the society of the Dor HaMabul was rated X. The Orgiastic Society, as the Rav called it, is a pleasure seeking society. Their prime objective is to enjoy.

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There is no self-reflection, no soul searching. Sensual pleasure is both the means and the ends. Orgiastic Man not only responds to biolgical drives whose fulfillment yields pleasure, but he experiments with how to create new artificial situations just for gratification.

As I mentioned before, we don't have to refer to our Chumashim or our history books to find the orgiastic society. We are immersed in it. Western society, especially the New Morality, the new values that are being expounded on campuses and in the mass media, glorifies the limitless, never ending addiction to pleasurable sensations and experiences.

Judaism has not preached asceticism and self-denial as have other religions. The Torah allows for enjoyable experiences and sensations, provided however that one knows when to retreat and withdraw. The rebuke against the Orgiastic Society is formulated in the 10th Commandment: Don't desire something beyond your reach. Accept and be happy with what you have. The person who subjugates himself to the higher moral force – the person who adheres to Divine Law with its restrictions and with its limitations may not enjoy the same moments of temporary pleasure that will be experienced by his counterpart in the Orgiastic Society. However, he will be able to enjoy something that the person who knows no bounds to his craving for pleasure will never experience – satisfaction. For Orgiastic Man everything will please -- but nothing will satisfy. The person who accepts Divine law is granted a double blessing, as we say in Birkas HaMazon: HaRachaman hu yigmeleinu kol tuv, u'meekol tuv l'olam al yechasreinu. The Merciful One will grant us all good, and from all good He will never cause us to be lacking. Why the redundancy? If we have "all good", then of course we will not be lacking "all good". The interpretation is as follows: You can have Kol Tuv (all good) – every luxury and every pleasure imaginable and yet all this will be worthless because you still feel a chisaron (lack) – you still feel your life is empty, something is missing. It is the person who controls his passions and limits his pleasures, who can have his cake and eat it too. He can enjoy Kol Tuv and yet still have the satisfaction of meekol tuv al yechasreinu – in a state of having all good, I feel nothing missing.

So much for the Generation of the Flood. The specific sin of the Dor Haflaga is not as easy to pinpoint. As the Medrash says: The sin of the Generation of the Flood is explicitly mentioned in the Torah, whereas the sin of the Generation of the Dispersion is no mentioned. However, with the aid of our Sages and the commentaries, we come to understand the sin of the civilization which the Rav characterized as Arrogant Society. The Torah narrates: "And they said to one another, 'Come let us make bricks. Come let us build ourselves a city and a tower with its top in Heaven, and let us make for ourselves a name.' "

The commentaries ask, "What kind of a "shem" (name) did they desire? Since we are dealing with all the inhabitants of the earth here, who were they trying to impress? With whom were they competing? We must say, the commentaries explain, they were striving to make a war against Heaven – they were trying to rival G-d Himself. Rather than serving and glorifying G-d, the intention of the builders of Migdal Bavel was to build their own cult – to serve and glorify themselves. The Torah continues: "And G-d came down to see the city and the tower that the people built. " Seforno makes an interesting comment on the language "And G-d came down" (VaYered Hashem). He says that the verb vaYered is used because the specific act of building the tower was not in itself worthy of punishment. It is only because of where it could lead, the consequences that could develop from it at a later date, that G-d was forced to intervene and upset their plans. Seforno compares it to the expression in the Gemara by Ben Sorer U'Moreh: Yarda Torah l'sof da'ato (The Torah descended to the end of his intentions). Even though at this young age, he was not deserving of punishment, the direction in which he was headed, the ultimate result of his present behavior is the reason for his harsh punishment.

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Of course, we all know the end of the story. G-d was bolel sefas kol ha'Aretz – he mixed up the language of the people of the earth into 70 languages so they were no longer able to carry out their plans "And therefore the name of the tower was called Bavel".

I mentioned earlier in connection with the Generation of the Flood that we needn't look to our Chumashim or history books to find the Orgiastic Society. The same is true of the Arrogant Society. Again we have it right here before our very eyes. Indeed we needn't look past the shadows of Rubin Hall to find our very own Midgal Belfer. "And the Board of Trustees said to one another 'Come let us make bricks; come let us build a tower with its top in Heaven – and we will make for YU a name'." Again we must ask – what kind of a "name" do we desire? Who are we trying to impress? With whom are we competing?

Should it be the goal of Yeshiva University to duplicate the efforts of a dozen other better run, better financed secular graduate schools or should she concentrate her limited resources on strengthening and improving her unique Yeshiva College set up? Should YU strive to leave its imprint on the landscape of Washington Heights or should she rather be concerned with leaving her mark on the face of the rapidly assimilating American Jewish community? As Seforno comments, the building of Migdal Belfer is not in and of itself the greatest problem. Its consequences and the direction it foreshadows is the crux of the problem.

I don't expect to solve the problem of Migdal Belfer any more than I am able to curb the passions of our Orgiastic Society. Nevertheless, I think it is beneficial to point out the various "paths that are not correct" (derachim she'aynam yesharim) so that in choosing the right path for ourselves, both in terms of being able to control our desires, being able to say no to our passions and in terms of setting the proper priorities in our personal studies, we will have benefited by the mistakes of others.

May we now have reached the level of sur me'rah and be prepared to learn from Lech-Lecha and onwards the midos of "Aseh Tov".

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Spiritual MononucleosisNovember 1972

As every dorm resident knows, one of the duties of a dormitory counselor is to wake up the boys on his floor for minyan. As a third year counselor, I will tell you frankly that we often get quite discouraged and suffer from a sense of failure at our inability to succeed in this particular aspect of the job. I am not speaking about those boys who throw shoes at us as we come by in the morning, nor am I referring to those bochrim, who upon hearing our knock leap out of bed to engage us in physical battle. On the contrary, from such cases a counselor gets a great deal of satisfaction, knowing he has fully succeeded in awakening the student. The disappointment comes from the other cases – those students who respond apparently positively to that friendly 7:30 knock. It is precisely because the response is positive – "Yes, I hear you, thanks for waking me. I'll be right down, O.K. I'm getting up," – precisely because of the positive response, the disappointment is that much greater when half an hour later we are still short for a minyan.

To be perfectly honest, I had been feeling very upset about my failures in this area and like the losing football couch began to ponder whether perhaps the fault was not with the players but with myself. Perhaps it was time to hang up the old key-ring and call it quits. Fortunately, I received a tremendous psychological boost, when going through the Mayanah shel Torah on this week's sedrah. Perhaps, it was non my fault after all. Perhaps there is something about certain students – which by their very natures cause them to act in this manner.

On the Pasuk beginning "And Jacob arose from his sleep and he said, behold the L-rd is here in this place", the Mayanah shel Torah quotes the following interesting insight: By Pharoah it states (referring to the verses in Miketz where Pharoah has his famous dreams): "And Pharoah awakened and he went back to sleep and dreamt a second time." This is the difference between Yakov and Pharoah. When Yakov awakes from his sleep, immediately he gravitates towards Torah and the Avodah and says "Behold there is a G-d in this place". However, when Pharoah awakens from his sleep, immediately – he rolls over and goes back to sleep.

One of the other duties of dormitory counselors is to occasionally prepare droshos to say at Seudah Shlishis. Here, too, one often has similar difficulties and if the drosha gets to be too philosophical or long winded, he will notice that his audience is again following the example of Pharoah – "And he fell asleep and he dreamt again."

With that in mind, in a more serious vein, I wish to briefly discuss the following thought this afternoon: In the parsha [31:27-29] where we read of Yakov's escape from Lavan and Lavan's subsequent pursuit and confrontation with Yakov, we are struck by the following strange statement in the Lavan-Yakov dialogue. Lavan complains: "Why did you flee so secretly and steal from me and did not tell me that I might have sent you away in joy and with songs, with timbrel and with harp. And you did not permit me to kiss my sons and daughters. It lies within the power of my hand to do evil unto you."

What goes on here? First Lavan complains that Yakov didn't give him a chance to throw a going away party with songs and music; he didn't let him kiss the grandchildren goodbye, and then all of a sudden he turns around and threatens him, telling him "you're lucky I don't harm you."

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A similar difficulty arises a few verses earlier, in G-d's warning to Lavan as he approached Yakov's camp with his evil intentions: "Take heed to yourself that you speak not to Jacob, either good or bad." The Gemarah in Yevamoth raises the obvious question: We can understand why Lavan was warned not to speak evil with Yakov, but what was wrong with speaking with him good? The Gemarah there provides the answer: "This teaches us that the favors of the wicked are evil for the righteous". Lavan's peculiar statement to Yakov can be understood in a similar manner. This is the nature of Lavan's parties and kisses – at the very same instant he appears to be doing you a favor, embracing and kissing – at that very moment, you must be alert and keep your guard up lest harm come to your from it.

The phenomenon of the kiss of Lavan should not be a new one to us. Last Friday night during his remarks to the students, Dean Bacon mentioned a classical case of "the good of the wicked is bad for the righteous". In discussing why Yeshiva College is not affiliated with the prestigious Phi Beta Kappa national honor society, the Dean explained that when he first came to YU he made inquiries with the society proposing that YC become affiliated with them. He was told that YC was ineligible because the school was too parochial. He then dispatched 3 faculty members who were Phi Beta Kappa members themselves to the national office to testify that the apikorsus, I mean the courses taught here were the same as at any other college. Finally, the clarification came through. It is not because of the courses offered that we consider you parochial, but because your student body is all Jewish. Show us twenty non-Jewish students at Yeshiva College and you will qualify for Phi Beta Kappa. The Dean correctly realized that such a "Birkas Rasha" we didn't need and told them that if that's what it takes to get a Phi Beta Kappa, they can keep it.

Unfortunately, all too often we are not on guard against the hazards of accepting Birkos Reshaim – the blessings of the wicked. All too often we lust after the kisses of Lavan and from such kisses contact a disease which I will call spiritual mononucleosis. This problem is especially difficult in an atmosphere such as our own in which we believe in synthesis. We strive to have the best of both worlds, the world of Torah and the world of Madah. We try to duplicate the feat of Yakov Avinu – With the wicked Lavan I have lived and yet the 613 commandments I have kept.

The Torah tells us that Yakov prospered greatly during the years he was with Lavan and yet there came a time when Yakov had to leave Lavan – a time when he had to be on guard against the blessing and kisses of the Aramean. Modern Orthodox Judaism, as typified by the students of YU and as typified by YU itself has prospered much from their association with Lavan, so to speak. The development of a large community of Orthodox doctors, scientists, lawyers, and businessmen in this country can be traced back to the proven feasibility of the "with Lavan I have lived and the mitzvos I have kept" – the feasibility of Torah and Maddah's coexistence. If even half of what the Dean said last week about the school's reputation is true, then YU's existence is truly a sanctification of G-d's Name in the eyes of the Nations.

On the other hand, do we not show the symptoms of spiritual mononucleosis? Do we not sometimes lust too much for the Birkos Reshaim? Be that a Birkas Rasha in the form of Government aid at the expense of the school's religious character, be it in the form of a course listing limited to the traditional liberal arts subjects at the expense of courses in Halachic Medical Ethics and the like; be it in the form of demanding required study in the fields of Music, Art, and Foreign Languages at the expense of allowing students to transfer a higher number of elective credits from their Jewish studies department.

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On a personal level as well, many of us lust after the blessing of society and the kiss of approval from our peers and seem to not heed the symptoms of spiritual mono from which we suffer. We too seek out Birkos Reshaim be they in the form of supposed sophistication of modern literature and movies at the expense of proper values of Tznius and morality; be they in the form of the title Phd and a salary of $30,000 a year at the expense of committing oneself to a life of Limud Torah and personal commitment to Klal Yisroel; or be it in the form of being 'cool' and 'with it' in one's manner of speech, dress, and behavior at the expense of maintaining one's uniqueness as a ben Torah.

In conclusion, I am not necessarily advocating a Meah Shearim society, isolated completely from the world of Lavan. I believe we should continue to strive for the ideals of "with Lavan I have lived and the 613 commandments I have observed", but at the same time we must realize that we are walking on a tight-rope and carefully analyze all of the consequences of accepting a Birkas Rasha. In short living in a world such as our own, one must say "Kol ha'olam kulo gesher tzar me'od" (The entire world is a narrow bridge), V'haIar, l'fached ketzas (and the important thing is to be a little bit afraid).

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The Ninth Day Of Chanukah: Why NotDecember 1972

I'm sure during the last week every one must have heard several times the famous question of the Beis Yosef – why is Chanukah 8 days, it should only be 7 days because there was enough oil to last for 1 day, so the miracle only lasted 7 days. Many of the answers to this question remind me of the story of the darshan who began a drosha by asking why is Lech-Lecha written with two cheses. Someone interrupts him and says "but Lech-Lecha is not written with two cheses – it's written with two chafs!". Whereupon the darshan replied, "That is one answer, but I have a better answer."

A perhaps more serious question that Rishonim and Achronim discuss, but one which we don't hear about as often is why in fact is Chanukah in Chutz L'Aretz not 9 days? Just as we say by Shalosh Regalim in Chutz L'Aretz that because of the sefeika d'yoma (doubtful day), we add an extra day to the holiday, so too by Chanukah let us have a ninth day, due to sefaika d'yoma. The same question applies to Purim, and in fact many of the answers given to this question apply only to Purim – namely in the form of Purim Torah – including perhaps some of what I will be discussing.

The Toldos Yakov Yosef and the Arvei Nachal discuss the question in connection with the question of the Beis Yosef (why Chanukah shouldn't be 7 days), and they come up with the clever but rather startling conclusion that in fact Chanukah should be 7 days, but because of sefeika d'yoma, we celebrate it for 8 days. The obvious question to which they do not reply is that in Eretz Yisroel we also celebrate Chanukah for 8 days!

Later authorities kvetch at the following answer which would address both the question of 7 and 9 days together: They say there had to be an even number of days in Chanukah, so that every night it would be clear from the number of candles lit that we pasken like Beis Hillel over Beis Shamma in the question of Mosif v'Holech (starting at one candle and adding one each night) or Poches v'holech (starting at 8 candles and subtracting one each night). If Chanukah would be 7 or 9 days then on the fourth or fifth day respectively, you would light 4 or 5 candles regardless of whether you start at one and add one each night like Beis Hillel or start at 7 or 9 and subtract each night like Beis Shammai. Therefore we celebrate 8 nights of Chanukah both in Eretz Yisroel and in Galus. This explanation of course leaves unsolved the problem of how the Macabees had the foresight to know there would be a dispute between Beis Hillel and Beis Shammai on this issue.

The Baal HaItur and the Avudraham give what would appear to be the most straight forward answer: Chanukah is itself a Mitzvah D'Rabbanan and we apply the principle of sefeika d'rabbanan l'kula (being lenient in cases of Rabbinic doubt) so we only celebrate 8 days even in chutz L'Aretz, unlike Shalosh Regalim where we have a sefeika d'oraita (Biblical case of doubt) and we must go l'chumra – keeping an extra day due to this calendar-based doubt.

The Minchas Chinuch in Mitzvah 301 concerning the seventh day of Pessach discusses the whole question at length. He brings the reason of sefeika d'yoma in a d'Rabbanan being l'kula and disagrees with that reason. He says, if that principle would apply, then in Chutz L'Aretz we would wind up keeping only seven days – because not only is the 9th day of Chanukah a safek (maybe it's really Teves 3), but the first day should also be a safek (maybe it's really Kislev 24). We should then say in both cases sefeika d'Rabbanan l'kula and not celebrate either the first or the 9th day, for the 9th day is no more of a safek than the first day.

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He compares this situation to a law brought down by the Ra"n in Pesachim. By the Daled Kosos there is a machlokes whether only the first two cups have to be drunk reclining or only the last two cups have to be drunk reclining. The Ra"n concludes that since the halacha was not resolved definitively one way or the other, we have to be strict and drink all four cups reclining. The question is -- reclining for the four cups is a rabbinic law, so why do we say sefeika l'chumra (being strict in a case of doubt)? The answer is that were we to work with the normal principle of sefeika d'Rabbanan l'kula we would apply it to both the first 2 cups and the last 2 cups and we would have a tarti d'sasra (self-contradictory situation), entirely uprooting the enactment of reclining for 2 cups. We have no choice but to go l'chumrah in both directions and drink all four cups reclining. Here too in connection with Chanukah, if we would apply sefeika l'kula on both the first and ninth days we would uproot the enactment of an 8 day Chanukah. We therefore have to – like with Daled Kosos – go l'chumra in both directions and celebrate 9 days.

The Minchas Chinuch has the unique opinion that ayn hachi nami in the time of the Beis HaMikdash when they sanctified the New Moon based on visual sightings and there was a real doubt about the day of Rosh Chodesh in distant locations, they in fact celebrated nine days of Chanukah. However, nowadays when we have a fixed calendar there is no doubt about when the 25th of Kislev is. The only reason that by Shalosh Regalim we keep an extra day is because of Minhag Avosainu (that was the custom of our ancestors), by Chanukah since it is only a Rabbinic enactment to start with, Chazal were not strict to make us keep a ninth day.

What comes out from all this is that the reason we don't have a ninth day of Chanukah in Chutz L'eretz,, that is the reason it is not Chanukah in New York today is because it would be a Chumrah (stringency). We may infer from this, that if making today Chanukah in New York would be a kula (leniency), it would be Chanukah. Now for me, making today Chanukah is a kulah. Because, were it not Chankuah today, I would have to prepare a drosha on Parshas Miketz and since I was only asked to speak early Friday morning, I had no time to prepare a drosha on Miketz. If however, today were Shabbos Chanukah, it would be a tremendous kula for me, since I could say over the Chanukah vort, I already said earlier in the week at my dorm floor's Chanukah Chagiga. Since for me the reason of not making today Chanukah in New York does not apply, I will feel free to say over the following short Chanukah thoughts:

In Sefer HaToda'ah, Rabbi Eliyahu Kitov mentions the origin of playing with a dreidel on Chanukah. He says that since the children all had money in their pockets – as a result of the recently received Chanukah Gelt, and since the excitement and distraction caused by the lighting of the Chanukah candles was so great, they were anyhow being mevatel Torah during those long winter evenings. We therefore tell them "Alright – we'll let you have a break and enjoy a little relaxation from your studies. You can have fun: playing dreidel. But even when you seek diversion from your studies, even when you seek to get away from the formal classroom or book learning, even then you must keep in mind G-d's miracles and the wonders He has done for His people." For this reason, the dreidel's sides contain the letters Nun Gimmel Hay Shin – Nes Gadol Haya Sham – reminding us, even while we are 'gambling' of G-d's miracles and of our unique position as G-d's people.

The lesson of this for us is simple. Our daily routine, our whole life is divided up between various activities: Part of the day we learn Torah and part of the day we play dreidel. That is part of the day we are in our religious divisions, part of the day we are in college, and part of the day and night we are on our own seeking our own distractions and forms of relaxation. What we can learn from the game of dreidel is what a former Rebbe of mine once described

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as the formula for success at YU: "When you are in your Yeshiva classes in the morning, forget that you go to college in the afternoon; and when you go to college in the afternoon -–remember that you go to Yeshiva in the morning." All our academic and social activities – even the secular ones -- must be engraved with the letters Nun Gimmel Hay Shin – so that we do not leave the Beis Medrash or Yeshiva and tell ourselves that now – while we are not reading a Gemarah or while we are not being watched over by our Rebbeim – that now we are like the students at Columbia or NYU or City College. Our unique heritage and unique responsibilities are things we must remember even while we spin the dreidel of our twentieth century existence.

I'll conclude with one other short thought: The question is raised concerning the miracle of the oil: Why was it necessary to have a miracle performed? Where do we find that G-d should perform a miracle just so that we would be able to fulfill a mitzvah? What would have been so tragic if no miracle was performed and they didn't light the Menorah in the Beis HaMikdash right away? After all, there was no Menorah lit for many months prior to the time the Macabees recaptured the Temple, so it would have taken another week until they made fresh oil! We have a principle ones Rachmana patrei – the Torah excuses one who due to circumstances beyond his control can't do a mitzvah.

The answer is that the very reason for the miracle of Chanukah was to demonstrate G-d's love for Israel. He is so interested in having them perform His will and do Mitzvos that He will even perform miracles -- make the seemingly impossible become possible so that we can do a Mitzvah. There are many mitzvos which seem impossible to fulfill. I've been told it's impossible to go to minyan in the morning while carrying a double program, it's impossible to wear Tsisis in warm weather; it's impossible to keep the Torah's stringent standards of sexual behavior in the twentieth century; it's impossible to fulfill the mitzvah of Ahavas Yisroel regarding certain inddividuals, etc., etc.

This then is the lesson of Chanukah. There is a concept of siyata d'Shmaya – the help of Heaven to accomplish the seemingly impossible when it comes to fulfilling mitzvos. If we give up and say there is not enough oil to burn for 8 days, so it doesn't pay to light the Menorah at all, we will not get siyata d'Shmaya. But if we don't give up, if we make the effort and do the best we can, then even if it seems impossible when we start, we can rely on HaKadosh Baruch Hu's love for the fulfillment of mitzvos that we will be aided by siyata d'Shmaya so that we can perform the seemingly impossible mitzvos.

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Free Will Of Man (Bechira Chofshis)(Outline of Class Given in mid 1970s)

I. Questions Requiring Analysis.A. Is man the cause of all his actions or does he only appear to be free to chose,

while in fact his fate is predetermined by G-d (or 'nature' or 'planetary influences')?1. To deny man's free will would be to question G-d's justice in meeting

out reward and punishment.2. To deny man's free will would be to question the purpose of the Torah.3. Before accepting the axiom of man's free will we must resolve

Question B below.4. Before accepting the axiom of man's free will we must explain many

difficult sayings in the Talmud which would seem to contradict this principle.

5. A compromise position would seem to be in accordance with many of the Talmudic statements – namely, man does have free will in matters of ethical choice, but he does not have total control over his destiny in other areas.

B. If we assume man has free will – how can we reconcile that with G-d's foreknowledge?1. The foreknowledge of G-d is axiomatic to Judaism.2. The free will of man – at least in the areas of ethical choice – is also

axiomatic to Judaism.

II. Biblical Statements of Relevance to the Questions raised above:A. Indications of free will:

1. Devorim 30:19 – "Life and Death I have put before you; the Blessing and the Curse; and you shall choose the Blessing

2. Every commandment to do or not to do something implies free will as mentioned above (A2).

B. Statements which seem to imply the lack of free will.1. Bereishis 15:13 – "And He said unto Avram: Know for a fact that

your seed shall be a stranger in a land that is not theirs; and shall serve them; and they shall afflict them 400 years, etc."

2. Devorim 31:16 – "And the L-rd said to Moses: Behold you are about to sleep with your fathers and this people will rise up and go astray after the foreign gods of the land, etc.".

3. Shemos 14:14 -- "And the L-rd spoke unto Moses saying: And I will harden Pharoh's heart, and he shall chase after them."

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III. Mishnaic and Talmudic Statements of Relevance to the Above.A. Indications of free will:

1. Pirkei Avos 3:15 (Statement by Rabbi Akiva) "Everything is foreseen; but freedom of choice is given."

2. Shabbos 104a (Statement by Reish Lakish) "If one comes to defile himself, one is given an opening; if one comes to cleanse himself, he is helped.

B. Indications of the limitations of free will:1. Shabbos 156a (Statement by R. Chanina) "The planetary influence

gives wisdom, the planetary influence gives wealth, and Israel stands under planetary influence." (R. Yochanan, Rav, Shmuel, R. Akiva, and R. Nahman b. Yitzchak maintain "Israel is immune from planetary influence").

2. Chulin 7b (Statement by R. Chanina) "No man bruises his finger here on earth unless it was so decreed against him in Heaven.

3. Berachot 33b (Statement by R. Chanina) "Everything is in the hands of Heaven, except the fear of Heaven."

4. Niddah 16b (Statement by R. Chanina b. Papa) "Before conception, the angel in charge of conception takes a drop and places it in the presence of G-d saying, 'What shall be the fate of this drop? Shall it produce a strong man or a weak man, a wise man or a fool, a rich man or a poor man?' Whereas 'wicked man' or 'righteous one' he does not mention, in agreement with the view of R. Chanina."

5. Sotah 2a (Statement of Rav) "Forty days before the creation of a child, a heavenly voice goes forth and declares: The daughter of A is for B, the house of C is for D, the field of E is for F."

IV. Comments of our Sages concerning Free Will vs. Foreknowledge.A. Sadiah Gaon (Emunot V'Deot)

1. Philosophically there is no contradiction between free will and foreknowledge; foreknowledge does not cause man's action.

2. Man senses he has free choice; so by definition he does – whatever he finally decides to do, that is what G-d knew all along he would do.

B. Bahye Ibn Pakuda (Chovot Ha'Levovot)1. Philosophically the problem cannot be resolved.2. Practically we should conduct ourselves according to both views:

a. We should have faith in G-d like one who is certain that all his actions are pre-determined.

b. One should carefully choose his course of action as if he controlled his own fate.

C. Rambam (Hilchos Teshuva).1. There is a philosophic problem; it can be resolved; but it is beyond

man's comprehension to understand the resolution; just as it is beyond man's comprehension to understand the essence of G-d.

2. Our belief in man's freedom to choose to do good or evil is based on tradition as well as on clear arguments.

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V. Comments of our Sages concerning the limitations of one's free will:A. Shneur Zalman of Liadi (Tanya)

1. A person only has bechira concerning his actions, not concerning his desires; mastery over one's will is not within man's power.

2. Some people are born with an inclination to do good; others with an inclination to do bad.

(Rambam in Hilchos Teshuva 7:3 states that a person is obliged to repent not only for his evil actions, but also for his evil character traits such as anger, hatred, jealousy, passion for money, honor, etc.)

B. Rambam (Igeres L'Yehudei Teman)1. The free will of Israel's enemies to destroy us is limited by G-d's

Divine Providence over Israel (i.e. G-d has promised that the Jews will never totally be destroyed; consequently H will not allow the enemy to exercise his free will in this regard).

2. Similarly, Israel's free will to – as a nation – totally disassociate themselves from G-d is limited by G-d's promise that Israel will never cease to exist as the nation of G-d (although individual Jews do have this option).

C. Eliyahu Dessler (Michtav m'Eliyahu)1. Every person has a "Nekudas ha'Bechira" – a point of choice at which

the battle between his Yetzer Hatov and Yetzer Haraw takes place.2. Above this point on the spiritual ladder are spiritual levels the person

wouldn't even think of attaining; below it are levels of sin a person wouldn't even think of transgressing.

3. One moves his 'point of choice' up or down the ladder by doing mitzvos or averos.

D. Rambam (Shmoneh Perakim)1. Historically we find G-d on occasion takes away the option of a person

to repent from his sins (Pharoah, Sichon, Seven Nations, etc.)2. In such cases the punishment they receive is for their previous sins, not

for the fact that they didn't repent.

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Orthodox Jews Should Become Involved In Organizational Activity With The Jewish Community At Large

(Debate between David Twersky and David Balint – Held as BCMH Saturday Night Cultural Program circa 1978)

I have taken the distinctly unpopular side of the issue in question. Jews in general (and traditional Jews are no exception) have a particular affinity for organizational activity and the acceptance of communal responsibility. Indeed the sense of purpose and commitment to one's fellow-man and the community at large is such an integral part of our religion that it is no wonder the battle cry of involving oneself in community-wide organizations and responsibilities strikes such a receptive note in the conscience of Traditional Jews. Add to that our desire to counter-act the charge by non-traditional machers in the community that "the Orthodox are stick-in-the-muds, free-loaders, apathetic and stingy parochialists" and you have the makings of a seemingly unchallengeable position.

I wish to argue, however, that as noble as our motivations may be and as high-sounding as the goals are on a theoretical level, the realities of Jewish life today -- locally as well as nationally --make the communal philosophy impractical, improper, and imprudent.

The realities of Jewish life today are that traditional Jews are in the minority. Judaism isn't a democracy, so there is no danger that the Shulchan Aruch will be repealed by a resolution of the Conference of Presidents of American Jewish Organizations or that Rabbi Yosef Karo will be given a vote of no-confidence by the American Jewish Congress; but we are a minority nevertheless.

As a minority, pledged to an Eternal, although sometimes unpopular code of behavior, traditional Jews (to the extent that they wish to be faithful to traditional Judaism), must maintain a certain degree of hostility towards the non-traditional community and vice versa. I'm not saying to reject diplomacy nor am I denying that we do share some areas of common concern. The facts are however, that notwithstanding all our common interests, there are certain sensitive and explosive issues that must separate traditional Jews from the community at large – and all the diplomacy in the world is not going to make those issues go away. Whether it be Orthodox rejection of Conservative conversions or whether it be the question of whether a Reform Rabbi has the right to teach a Chumash class in a community-wide Day School or whether it be any of a host of areas of Orthodox "religious coercion" on the general community, halacha often requires us to take uncompromising stands which are guaranteed to lose friends and antagonize people. These are issues which constantly come up and which can not be overlooked. They render a satisfactory working relationship with the community at large totally impractical.

My second point is what I will call the Agudas Yisroel argument – namely the position that even though they are prepared to vote with the current coalition in the Israeli Government to insure their majority, they are unwilling to accept cabinet positions and become an official part of the Government inasmuch as they refuse to take collective responsibility for certain official Government acts of Chillul Shabbos, etc. Regardless of how one views the merits of the argument vis a vis Agudah's position in the Knesset, I think the point is a relevant one in our situation with community-wide organizations in America. While it is true that Kol Yisroel Arevim Zeh Bazeh – all Israel are responsible for one another and that each Jew has a religious obligation of Hocheach Tochiach et amitecha – rebuking his fellow man for wrong-doing; nevertheless, while this is true in a general way at all times, there is certainly a

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particular responsibility one bears for the activities and policies of any organization he actively associates himself with in a role of leadership or responsibility. To sit on a Board of a community wide organization and not to vociferously protest each and every action which goes contrary to one's religious convictions is to acquiesce to these actions. To sit through a totally 'pareve' agenda at a Board meeting of a community-wide organization and not to raise issues concerning the policy and direction of those organizations is a silent but clear endorsement of those policies and directions. Such a compromise of our standards and convictions is something which should not be accepted lightly.

Finally, aside from the impracticality of establishing a homogeneous working relationship with our non-traditional brethren, and aside from the impropriety of allowing our presence to give an implicit hechsher to some very non-kosher organizational policies, I believe that taking an honest stock of our numerical resources in terms of money, talents, and efforts, it is highly imprudent for us to dilute that reservoir by plunging into active involvement in a variety of broad-based organizations.

Without minimizing the importance of the multitude of causes for which communal organizations have been established, the fact remains that these organizations can and do survive without us. True we have leadership to offer, true if traditional Jews were involved in t hose organizations, some of the policies and activities of said organizations would be more to our liking; but it is a fact of life that not everything you would like you can have; not everything you hope to accomplish can be accomplished.

One must set priorities; determine where his efforts are essential and where they are marginal; which worthy institutions and organizations would survive without him and which would not survive without him. It is not popular to preach a reduction of expectations or to ask people to wake up to the reality that they are human and cannot accomplish everything they would like. But these are the facts: There is a finite amount of time, money, and energy that traditional Jewry has to offer towards Tzorchei Tzibbur – community affairs. If it is spent worrying about the swimming pool at the JCC, it cannot be spent worrying about the Mikveh in Seward Park. If it is spent on Bnai Brith Brotherhood projects, making the Jews an Or LaGoyim, it cannot be spent on building Yeshivot, making Seattle an Or HaTzafon. If it is spent on helping JNF plant trees, it cannot be spent on strengthening youth activities which implant within our youth the conviction that Torah is a Tree of Life.

Without a doubt our initial reaction is sure, let's go out and save the world, let's show those machers that the Orthodox have a mission and were meant to take charge of all communal affairs! A realistic appraisal of the situation however argues against such a rash decision. Such a path will only lead us into the trap of the tragic Shunamite in Shir HaShirim: "Bnei ami nacharu bee, samani noteirah es haKeramim; karmi sheli lo natarti": My mother's sons were incensed against me. They made me keeper over the vineyards. But my own vineyard, I did not keep.

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