How To Homeschool

A Self-Teaching Approach

By Steven Veach

This book is dedicated to all those parents out

there who long to take back the responsibility to educate

their own children, but who are unsure of how to go

about doing it.

It is my hope that this book will give you the

support and encouragement you need to offer your child

what we never received.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Ch 1 Introduction 1

Ch 2 Why We Decided to Homeschool 5

Ch 3 Our First Year 15

Ch 4 The Self-Teaching Approach 23

Ch 5 What About a High School Diploma 57

Ch 6 The Dreaded Topic of Socialization 63

Ch 7 Sending Kids into the World 75

Ch 8 A Book List - Sample 87

CHAPTER ONE

Introduction

This book was borne from a desire to share with

others our experiences and our own challenges in

homeschooling our three children. Before I

married my wife, I never would have believed that

I would be a homeschooling dad. I had always

thought that it was the right choice, though. I am

also convinced that it would have been a better

choice for me when I was growing up.

But I have learned that parents will change

more than the children if you choose to walk down

this path. Parents have more to learn and rarely

does it have anything to do with mathematics or

1

writing or social studies. We are faced with the

daunting task of reprogramming our minds. We

have a lot of preconceived ideas that swirl around

us all the time. They come from our own

childhood, from our schools, our churches, our

culture.

Most of the time these ideas manifest

themselves in the form of fear and anxiety. We

worry that we are not smart enough to teach our

kids. We stress over hindering our child's future

by trying to relive our youth. We fret over their

socialization, wondering if they will be ill

equipped to make lasting relationships when they

become adults.

Let me take a moment here to reassure you.

Everything is going to be okay. Take a deep

breath. Relax. If you are even considering

bringing your children home from public school

you are doing more than what most parents do. In

2

fact, though the thought of homeschooling may be

a daunting one, the reality is it is actually easier

than sending your kids off to school each year.

It is my hope that this book will settle some of

your concerns and encourage you to step out in

faith. I know from personal experience that you

and your children will be happier for doing so.

3

4

CHAPTER TWO

Why We Decided to Homeschool

I married my wife back in 2004. I was 29 years

old at the time and had no children of my own.

But, on the night I said “I do” I became both a

husband and an instant father to three children.

We settled into our new life as a blended family

rather quickly. Within the first few months I went

to my very first conference with Kyla's teacher.

She is our oldest and was in the 3rd grade at the

time.

Her problem, as the teacher put it, was that Kyla

was testing at the 1st grade level. She was not a

problem child, mind you. She sat quietly at her

5

desk throughout the day, did not bother anyone,

did not cause trouble. But she also would not do

her schoolwork. And the homework she brought

home on Friday was usually stuffed under the bed

and never saw the light of day again. We were a

bit troubled to say the least. So I tried to get

involved.

I would sit her down to do her schoolwork, but

she would cry and throw a fit. She said she

couldn't do it. She said she didn't understand it. It

was too hard. How could I argue with her? Most

of the materials she brought home were review

sheets that barely explained what she was

supposed to do, let alone how to do it. It got to the

point that we had to sit with her and prod her

along every few minutes to finish her work, just to

get a vocabulary sheet finished for the week.

I started to think maybe there was something

else going on. I soon came to realize that she

6

knew how to do the work. She understood it. But

she wanted her mother or I to sit with her before

she would do it. She wanted the undivided

attention from her parents.

This went on for a few months, as we clamored

for a different place to stay and struggled with our

daily work schedule. At that time we had daycare

for the little kids when we both had to work. It

was really hard.

I remember getting up after Tabitha had already

gone into work. I would eat breakfast alone and

get ready for work. Then I would wake up the two

little ones and get them ready to go to daycare.

Robin, our son, would look up at me every day

with an sleepy smile and ask, “Where are we

going today?” Of course, I would tell him that

they had to go to daycare, and this would trigger

the sobbing tears and the endless protests, “I don't

7

want to go.” or “Why can't we go to work with

you?”

The first step we made, as a result, was to get

rid of daycare and take lower paying jobs so we

could better control our schedules. This way the

kids would always have one of us home every day.

Looking back it has been the very best thing we

could have ever done for our children and our

family overall.

I do have to concede, my wife and I are very

biased against the public school system. Neither

of us had good experiences growing up in school.

I found out rather quickly that I could learn more

spending a day at our local library than I ever

would learn in a year of public school education.

It didn't help much that I was a bit of an asocial

child growing up. I had friends, but we were

always on the fringe, always outside of “the

group”. Despite all of the socialization available, I

8

tended to spend my recess time inside coloring or

sitting in a quiet place behind the tires.

High school became a game to both of us. My

wife spent most of her secondary education

skipping school, while I learned how to use the

system against itself. Every class was assigned

seat time, so I would show up just enough to slide

by – turn in enough assignments to just barely get

a passing grade. It quickly became a “them vs.

me” situation, and education and learning

suddenly became something to avoid.

What really saved me, though, was my love of

reading. I would read books every day. I would

read books rather than do school work. I had a

quest for knowledge, but was clearly told that the

pursuit of knowledge for itself was not allowed

within high school halls; at least it wouldn't count

for graduation. And, ten years later, I could see

this mentality already forming in my new

9

daughter. So I checked out our options. There

had to be another avenue for us.

I had known about homeschooling for awhile

already. When I met my wife I was enrolled in an

online college pursuing my undergraduate degree.

Why couldn't our kids do something like that?

Why wasn't there an online high school my kids

could attend?

After a little searching, I learned all the rules for

our State. We were lucky in that the laws here are

rather simple and provide a great deal of freedom.

But, we were not ready to give up on public

school just yet. After all, they all have degrees.

How would we teach them math? Its already hard

enough to get our oldest to do her homework, how

would we be able to get her to do all of her work

at home?

As we were pondering these questions, Kyla

brought home a slip announcing a field trip to the

10

local zoo for her class. We both thought this

would be a great opportunity for us to get involved

with her school. We signed up to be chaperones.

The date came for our trip and we arrived a bit

early and started blending in with the other parents

that had volunteered. The outing was okay, but

neither of us could believe the lack of supervision

that accompanied us that day. Kids were falling

into ponds, yell and screaming, throwing rocks.

We watched as our daughter slipped into the back

of the crowd of children. She didn't fit in very

well and it was obvious that she knew it, too. It

reminded me of my school days and how I had not

fit in.

After that trip we both agreed to take another

look at homeschooling. We knew that we wanted

something different, something better for our kids.

We knew that public school was not the only

11

option. But we had not idea where to really start

or what was even really legal.

I spent the next few weeks researching online,

reading books and talking to people who were

already homeschooling. There came a point when

we had all the legality issues addressed and the

scheduling worked out – it was now or never.

With no more road blocks standing in our way,

I took a morning, as I was coming home from

work, and stopped by our local Educational

Service District office. It took me about five

minutes to fill out the paper for all three children

saying that we were going to homeschool them.

Finally, our children were going to get a better

education. No longer were they going to get

unbalanced views, but were going to have a solid

foundation of discipline and consistency. We

were going to be able to remove the negative

influences that plague public school kids like a

12

cancer. But most of all, our kids were coming

home to stay. They were going to be with us and

we were going to be able to raise them as we

thought right.

13

14

CHAPTER THREE

Our First Year of Homeschooling

We didn't jump right into a curriculum when we

brought our kids home. We did spend a week or

two just getting used to the idea that they did not

have to go to daycare and that they no longer

needed to get up in the morning, rushing around to

get ready for the bus.

Our first outing was to the local bookstore. We

check out all the educational books they had and

purchased a number of them. Looking back on it

now I don't think we used any of those books –

maybe one or two of them.

15

Kyla was 10 at the time and testing at both

reading and math at 1st grade. Robin, our son, was

barely 6 and Alexis was only 4. Neither Robin

nor Alexis could read, so that was where we began

with them.

Keep in mind, I had never taught someone how

to read before. But we did find a phonics book

and started working in it as best we could. For

Kyla we purchased a math book that was

published by one of the popular Christian

companies. This served us for about a month

before it wound up in the garbage can. Alexis

became the new owner of a set of coloring and

activity books and a bran new box of crayons. We

thought at the time that she was too young to learn

anything – boy were we wrong.

We started out by bringing public school home

with us. At the time, I worked for my family and

they offered to watch the kids for us and then

16

provided a building after work so we could do

school. This consisted of three desks and a board

where I taught them different subjects. After

doing this for a number of months, I have to say, I

understand why teachers burn out. It is

impossible. And I only had three students!

It got to the point where I would spend all of

my weekend preparing for the school week. I was

stressed out. I was tired. I would grade papers at

night and try to work during the day and school

the kids in the afternoon. About three months

into it I was able to get my schedule changed and

we were able to take school back home.

This really changed things for us. We were

finally home-schooling. We were in the comfort

of our own home. We were able to relax. And

that is the key to this whole business. If you are

going to educate your children, you need to first

take some time for everyone to just relax. Believe

17

me when I tell you, its easier for your kids than it

will be for you.

Our culture is not a homeschooling culture.

And we Americans do not like to be told that we

have been doing something wrong. Somehow,

this is what we are saying to the rest of the

community when we bring our kids home – maybe

rightly so.

There tends to be a lot of pressure, a lot of

second guessing when it comes to raising children.

The great thing about homeschooling is that no

curriculum, schedule or approach will fit

everyone. The best way to really tackle it is not to

have any preconceived plans to begin with. Spend

your first few months, or even the first year just

enjoying each other. I wish we would have done

this when we first started. Your kids will most

likely not remember how to do square roots when

they are 40 years old. But they will remember

18

how your whole family spent every weekend

together. Last summer our family was able to

spend the majority of our time camping at the

coast, and not a pencil was raised nor a book

cracked, yet they learned more about nature and

animals than I could ever have taught them

myself.

During our first year of homeschooling, we

changed virtually everything we were doing many

times over. We changed schedules. We changed

bedtimes. We changed what time we would get

up. We changed our work schedules. It surprises

me that the kids learned anything at all that year

with all the upheaval.

Most of this anxiousness was caused by other

people. We were listening to the negativity of

the Grandparents. We started wondering whether

or not we were isolating our kids too much. All

the first questions we had would re-surface again

19

and again. What most people starting out don't

realize is there is plenty of time for your children

to grow up. There is plenty of time for your

children to learn.

Most of us have been programed to think in

terms of years and semesters. But, learning has

nothing to do with credits or seat time or

graduation requirements. These are all arbitrary

props that hold up the free educational system in

this country. And it has nothing to do with our

children.

Genuine learning has to do with growth and

experiencing life in authentic ways. Real learning

encourages us to consider ourselves and those

around us. It provides a holistic context that

cannot be found in public education. Their system

is synthetic, unnatural and counterfeit. Granted,

many do learn in this system. But the do so in

spite of it, not because of it.

20

There came a point, after we tried all the

different fancy curriculum packages and new,

improved methods of learning, that none of it

really made sense to us anymore. Each one of our

kids were different. Each one of them learned

differently. They were all at different learning

levels and they all thrived working at their own

pace, rather than by the dictates of each other or

some curriculum schedule.

Most of the materials that we purchased in the

first few years we never used, or they were

abandoned to the bookshelf after just a few

months. For awhile it was rather disconcerting. I

was plagued with doubts, wondering why I was

failing at teaching all these materials. Why wasn't

it working? Why were the kids so upset? What

were we doing wrong?

After the second year we were back to square

one again. But then we discovered something

21

called the 3 R's and this changed the way we

homeschooled. Since then, our children have

blossomed and have even taken hold of their own

education, making their own goals and tracking

their own plans.

Lets take a look at what we now call the self-

teaching approach.

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CHAPTER FOUR

The Self-Teaching Approach

Have you noticed that, in the last 100 years,

education has gotten much more complex? I'm

not talking about computers or technology, but the

way in which we educate children seems to grow

more confusing, more intricate with every passing

year. More is required from “professionals” these

days concerning education and how we go about

approaching the subject.

But, the question has to be asked? Was the past

so much worse than today? How many of us can

remember an elderly family member being able to

23

do division in their head? Many of us cannot even

do that with multiplication today.

If you take an afternoon and visit your local

library, browse through the old, turn of the

century, math textbooks. Compare it to the math

being taught today? Are we getting smarter and

are we learning more? Or is the standard

continually being lowered?

America is at the bottom in test scores and

ability. Is there no wonder why we are losing

professional and technical positions to

academically advanced countries? Could it be that

they still make their children study? Do they

teach them differently?

In all actuality, there is a great fallacy being

perpetuated in our society today. It states that

children should have freedom to express their

feelings, that they should be able to manifest those

feelings (no matter how inappropriate) and not be

24

held accountable for the consequences. After all,

they are just kids.

Unfortunately, this has removed any

opportunity for children to be disciplined. And if

there is no consistent discipline, then children will

simply fail to learn self-discipline. And it is not a

natural character trait for most, though the social

sciences would tend to argue.

What Kids Need to Learn

Children need a few things in order to be

homeschooled properly. Luckily for us, the

parents, these are the natural gifts that God has

given us – if we choose to exercise them.

The first thing they need is a stable

environment. It will not work in the long run if

your child cannot depend on a schedule for his

25

schoolwork. He needs to know, with relative

consistency, when and where he will be doing

school and for how long.

The second thing they need is a proper place

and adequate room to work. The kitchen table

may serve as a fine place, but their schoolwork

may frequently be interrupted by lunch, dinner or

anything else that may demand that space. If

possible, the very best solution would be for you

to have a space, a room or a portion of a room

designated as the learning area. This may contain

desks for each child, a book shelf to organize

supplies and materials and it should be relatively

free of daily distractions.

Within our first year of homeschooling, we

removed our televisions from our home. We did

this for a number of reasons, but our children's

schooling was impacted the most. When we had

the television, our kids would fight with us and

26

tried to hurry through their schoolwork so they

could watch TV. They would fight with us while

watching television, not wanting to start school.

And they would fight with us in the evening, not

wanting to go to bed.

After we got rid of the television, our kids

began to seek entertainment from books and

playing, rather than passively sitting through hours

of mindless shows. It has opened our living room

up to be a place for social gathering, rather than

having a place where we tune in and tune each

other out.

The third thing that children need, after they

have a settled schedule and a quiet, adequate place

to work, is consistent discipline. The parent needs

to realize – you need to understand – that you are

the parent. In our house the rules are very clear.

Our children understand the expectations and

know what they are responsible for and they know

27

the consequences if they do not comply. Our

discipline has always been corporal. It is a system

of black and white requirements that has removed

all the second guessing and contradiction that

seems to overwhelm children today. We have

found that children really do want limits and they

want to know what those limits are. They even

want to be punished when they break them.

The fourth thing that children need is a

challenge. They need materials that will engage

their minds. Their minds work very much like a

sponge when they are young, soaking up any

knowledge that is closest to them. We have found

the best option is not to move in the same

direction as the public school system has done.

Dumbing down materials only reinforces for kids

that they are dumb, not capable of processing real

information. Instead, we have selected a number

of texts that are geared toward adults, yet teach

28

material from basic to advanced level. Not only

does this encourage your children to view

themselves as adult-like (since this is where they

are heading), but it also strips away from the

material any reference to arbitrary grade levels

(which only hinder advancement).

Children need one last thing in order to learn:

they need us parents to get out of the way. They

may need us to keep them on task, they may need

us to help them with an occasional problem, but

the days of hand holding your child need to be

over. Unless you plan on going to all of their

interviews with them, going to college with them

and provide massive amounts of input into their

future marriages, it is wise to let them work

through their school materials on their own.

Otherwise, they will never learn to be

independent, critical thinkers when they strike out

on their own.

29

The 3 R's of Learning

We talked earlier about education and how

things were done 100 year ago. The reality is,

learning is nothing new. The idea that new

methods have been discovered about learning is

actually misleading. The fact is, these kinds of

sensational claims are designed more to sell books

in the academic community than they are at

providing any genuine kind of solution to the

problems of learning. In fact, these new fads are

often the cause of many of the deficits that we

have today in the public school system.

Years ago there was primarily one approach by

which most people were educated in. This was

called the 3 R's method.

The 3 R's refers to Reading, Writing and

Arithmetic (I don't know why – but it does). It

was believed that if a person learned to read,

30

learned to write well and learned to manipulate

numbers that they were educated (or at least could

do the rest themselves). The addition of

Geography, Sociology, Health, Government,

Economics and so on were not added to the

curriculum until much later.

Now, calm down. I'm not trying to insinuate

that these subjects are not worth studying. But,

what I am saying is these subjects should

rightfully take a back seat to the first three.

Knowing all 50 states and their capitals is not

going to land you a good job. But being able to

read and disseminate information from and with

the printed word could. The most important and

influential people in our society were schooled,

not through some public system, but through the

reading of good books.

A person in this world cannot go a day without

writing or communicating to someone else

31

through the written word. Granted, most of us

have horrible handwriting (which is getting worse

all the time), but we still use it throughout our

daily lives. We leave notes to each other. We

write papers in college. We outline projects at

work on computers. We take notes in business

meetings. Being able to effectively write and

express your ideas is paramount to a proper

education. And this must be learned in direct

connection with our learning to read.

Lastly, we must learn how to manipulate

numbers. Whether we are talking about working

on Wall Street or as a nurse in a hospital or at a

mill making lumber – we all use mathematics. It

is the language of science and it is the framework

from which we base our entire civilization. Yet,

how many children leave public school barely able

to read let alone solve mathematical equations. I

graduated high school without ever understanding

32

fractions, ratios or square roots. My kids had to

teach me about them.

I discovered the 3 R's by accident. I did not

find it in a book on how to educate my kids. I did

not hear about it from my child's teachers. I

happened to be looking online for a worksheet

when I ran across a website article that talked

about the 3 R's method. But, they had taken it a

step further.

Their approach was to provide structure,

disciple, adequate work environment and plenty of

challenging materials, and then – let them go.

They were required to read so many pages each

day from a reading list. They had to work through

a number of problems in a given math book, self-

correcting, and reworking the wrong problems

until they got them all correct. Lastly, they were

required to copy so many pages from a non-fiction

33

book or encyclopedia every day. This was it.

This was their curriculum.

After reading this article I wandered around the

Internet for awhile, not really paying attention to

what I was reading. Instead, I was thinking about

what I had read. How could it be possible? How

could kids learn that way? Would they learn that

way? No more papers to grade. No more lessons

to plan. It was a crazy idea, but I had to see if it

would work. And it did.

When we moved our homeschooling back

home, I told the kids we would be doing things a

little differently. I sat them down and gave them a

list of books they could choose from. Then I gave

them each a math book suited for their level and

also each received a binder and a ream of

notebook paper. I explained to them that they

were required to read 50 pages from a book on the

book list, copy 1 notebook page worth from the

34

encyclopedia and complete 5 pages in their math

book each day. Amazingly enough, after a few

moments of blinking at me, our kids sat down and

did their work. And, for the most part, this has

been our experience with the self-teaching

method.

There are no real time limits. There is no seat

time. There are no lectures. They are required to

complete a specific amount of work each day and

if it takes them 20 minutes or 12 hours, it is up to

them. By using this approach, our children learn

how to organize and prioritize their time, stay on

task and yet are free to work in an environment

that best suits them (within reason).

They are motivated by the fact that they choose

when they are done. They ultimately determine if

they will receive any free time to play, or if they

will be doing schoolwork until bedtime.

35

Yes, the parent does need to be watchful. A

child, especially young children, have not yet

learned self-discipline and must be repeatedly

reminded to get back to work. Likewise, the

obstinate children who refuses to do his work must

be disciplined accordingly. But, this process will

only persist for a short time, as it is the natural

desire of a child to be loved and cared for enough

to be made to obey.

The secret to this approach is that a child cannot

help but learn. He is incapable of resisting

knowledge. Remember, your child's mind is like a

sponge. Learning does not hurt if allowed to be

pursued naturally. And there is no better choice

for your children than for you to bring them home

and surround them with books.

36

Special Projects

Now, I'm sure you are mumbling under your

breath still about the other subjects not covered.

Well, lets take a look here and cover all of our

bases.

Our children have a pre-selected list of books

that they are required to pick from for their daily

reading. Parents can get a list off the Internet,

from their local school or better, create one from

what is available at their local library (my kids

have provided a list in the back of this book of

their favorites to get you started).

These books should be a balance of all the

different subjects you want them to learn about

and be exposed to while they are studying. This

can include: Science, Geography, Social Studies,

History, Government, Economics, Personal

Finance, Health, Sports, Poltics, Religion, etc.

37

The list is endless and can include anything that

you or your children are interested in. Be sure to

include a few classics as well as a large selection

of fiction books. We chose fiction books from

previous generations as opposed to modern books

because of religious convictions. Some of these

books are also included in the back of this book.

Another way in which we covered topics not

included in the 3 R's was through requiring our

children to design and complete special projects.

These could be in virtually any subject area and

should be opportunities for your children to

express their individuality as well as their critical

thinking.

Computers and the Internet

I do want to take a moment here and talk about

technology and how the advancement of

38

computers and the Internet have literally

transformed the world in which we live.

How many of us can remember back to a day

when a personal computer in the home was

unheard of? I can remember when downloading a

100 meg file off the Internet would take all day.

Now I am able to do it within just a few minutes.

Ipods, blackberries, laptops, internet cafes – the

world is changing at a gallop. Nearly every job

today requires at least a basic understanding of

computers.

One negative aspect of homeschooling is the

lack of technology that is available to them – if

their parents are not using it. Though it is very

popular, the use of the internet and computers in

homes still has not reached critical mass yet. This

means there is a significant segment of the

population who are computer illiterate.

39

If you are one of these people and intend to

homeschool your children – great. You are able to

do so, even without the use of computers. But, do

your son or daughter a favor and buy a computer

and learn how to use it together.

Today it is possible to learn computers as you

go in a new job. Tomorrow it may not be that

easy. Industrial jobs are disappearing, while

technology and professional jobs are increasing in

America. It is quickly become a requirement

rather than complementary.

Making It Free

It is usually thought of as a downside to

homeschooling, that we are responsible to cover

all of the costs of our children's education. This

includes the purchase of materials such as books,

paper, pencils, equipment and even the testing

40

requirements, depending on the particular state

you live in.

Many homeschooling families, when they first

begin, opt to purchase a “complete” curriculum.

These programs are designed to contain all the

materials needed for an entire year, or even their

entire primary and secondary education. These

programs usually cost between $200 and $2000,

And that usually includes only enough materials

for just one student.

When we brought our kids home, we did not

have a lot of money. Both of us were working low

paying jobs, so all the money we could spare went

to paying off bills and other essential expenses.

We were fortunate, in that we had to find an

alternative to this high priced solution.

After we discovered the self-teaching method,

we started compiling a list of books for our kids to

read. I worked from a previous list I found on the

41

internet, adding where I though they needed more

materials and subtracted where I believed it was

necessary. We ended up with a list of 300 plus

titles that covered a wealth of subjects and reading

levels from nursery rhymes to non-fiction books

by Albert Einstein. I made sure that the majority

of these books could be found at our local library.

This reduced the huge cost of purchasing titles

from bookstores and resell shops.

This does not mean that you should not buy

books if you desire to, or if your schedule makes

visiting your library each week a bit difficult. The

flexibility is the beauty of homeschooling.

We also utilized the Internet, especially for our

mathematics materials. When our children were

learning their basic arithmetic, we were able to

capitalize on consumable worksheets, drills and

exercises. We also had them memorize their

addition, subtraction, multiplication and division

42

by simply copying all problems up to 12. The

total costs associated with this was a $40.00

printer cartridge and about $10 worth of notebook

paper.

We did choose to purchase their math books,

finding a series of self-teaching texts that worked

from basic arithmetic to algebra, geometry and

calculus. Our children simply worked through the

material until they could pass the chapter tests in

each book, and then they would move on to the

next one.

The last cost saving measure will depend on

your state requirements for homeschooling. In

our state we are required to test our children a total

of four times in their primary and secondary

grades. We wanted to have a better handle on

their progress, though, so we decided to test them

every year.

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Instead of utilizing the state required testing

each year and paying the associated fees, we

found the sample tests for various states that have

been released online. These tests are very similar

to those required by the state and some of them are

even graded automatically online for you. The

best part of it is – they are completely free.

How We Do School

Our kids do not go to school. Instead, they have

their studies that must be done each day. It is

considered their job, their occupation. As such,

they get up when we get up, they do their chores,

eat breakfast and then get their desks ready.

Their school day begins with a checklist of

required subjects they must cover. This list of

subjects can include any combination, depending

on the family interests. Our kids focus on the

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following subjects: Mathematics, Reading,

Typing, Writing and Special Projects (if any).

Generally, our kids choose what order they

complete their assignments in. Each subject has

an assigned series of materials as well as specific,

measurable requirements for each day. These are

usually assigned individually and are based on

skill level and recent progress. We have a

Required Reading List that contains over 300

book titles ranging from fiction to non-fiction,

covering multiple subjects. They generally are

required to read 50 pages each day.

Their mathematics materials are organized in a

progression sequence – each skill learned is

typically needed for the next skill to be learned.

They start with simple manipulatives (beans,

blocks, candy, etc). With these they practice and

learn to add, subtract, multiply and divide basic

numbers up to 10. Once they have a firm grasp of

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this, then they begin using a computer program

that simulates mathematics tests of all basic

arithmetic from 0 to 12. If you do not have access

to a computer, flash cards can be substituted. It is

important, though, to drill until your child gets

100% consistently.

Once they know their addition, subtraction,

multiplication and division to 12, it is time for

them to start working in their math books. For

this we use the Wiley Series of self-teaching

books. Here is the progression list that our

children are using:

Quick Arithmetic By Robert A Carmen

All the Math You Need By Steve Slavin

Practical Algebra By Steve Slavin

Geometry By Steve Slavin

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Geometry & Trigonometry By Peter H. Selby

Pre-Calculus By Steve Slavin

Quick Calculus By Daniel Kleppner

Statistics By Donald J. Koosis

Quick Business Math By Steve Slavin

These books were all chosen primarily for their

approach. They are well written, and contain all

the answers to the examples, exercises,

assignments and tests. Our children work through

each book on their own, doing 5 pages each day.

They self-grade all of their work, except for the

chapter tests. These they must pass or they are

required to rework all the assignments in that

chapter.

This approach provides children with a

tremendous amount of responsibility for their own

education. There are no grade levels and there are

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no arbitrary assignments given as busy work to

simply occupy their time. Everything they learn

they will need for the next chapter, the next book

and so on. And they are learning real material –

adult material.

They may take three months to finish a book or

three weeks. It provides a child the ability to work

at his or her own pace entirely, allowing them (and

their parents) to ensure they have a complete grasp

of the material.

As for Reading, our children also work at their

own pace. This, of course, is after they are passed

the decoding stage and can sound out words on

their own.

If you are teaching a child to read, do not make

it more complicated than it really is. To teach

someone to read, you need a chart of the alphabet

and a good reader book or book series. When

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teaching our children to read, we used the

McGuffey Reader series.

Practice both their letters and their sounds. Do

not rely on sight teaching, as this will only confuse

your child as well as limit their reading level in the

future. Give them a firm foundation in the

phonics of the English language.

Once they can say every letter and its

corresponding sound, start them on McGuffey's

Primer. Work at their pace, but be sure to

challenge them with each session of reading. New

readers can start with just two lines or as much as

a few pages, whatever you are comfortable with.

If you are consistent you will have your child read

every day. Increasing the amount of reading

steadily and they will learn to read.

Once a child is able to read on their own, they

should be encouraged to do so. Our children each

have their own copy of the book list and mark off

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books as they complete them. Younger children

are required to read from the first titles, as these

are early reading books geared for their levels.

Each section of books contains both fiction and

non-fiction. In each section they are allowed to

substitute one title for another. This is so they

have more choice to explore the subjects they

have interest in. Kyla, for example, always

replaces a Science book for an Archeology book

on Ancient Egypt.

The secret to raising readers is to get them to

read and keep them reading. This requires a few

things from you. One, if you can't motivate them

to read with the television or video games in the

house – get rid of them. Otherwise, you will never

break that hold. Second, you have to make it a

priority to keep interesting reading material in

front of your children. Trust me when I say, they

will learn to read very quickly. But this does

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means that you will be making weekly trips to the

library or book store. If you don't, they will never

get the taste for books.

To teach our children how to write, we found

the best method was to have them practice writing

from quality written works. One investment that

we made (though we did not actually buy them)

was a good encyclopedia set.

Each day our children are required to pick a

topic and write a notebook page worth of material

out of the encyclopedia. Learning this way not

only provides them with a firm foundation of

discipline, but it is also holistic. Children do not

realize that they are learning how to write. They

do not realize that they are learning how to

correctly use punctuation. They do not understand

that they will quickly master the use of the semi-

colon simply by coping work. But they do.

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Once their reading level will allow them to do

so, they are required to read the book, English

Grammar for Dummies by Geraldine Woods.

There are no assignments in this book, just

reading. It provides a great, and sometimes

humorous, introduction to why things are the way

they are in the English language. After this book

is finished, they move on to The Writer's

Handbook by Barry Turner. This text is much

more thorough and provides detailed examples as

well as many exercises.

After these two texts have been covered, it is

time for your children to stretch out and start

writing for themselves. Our children were

required to make a list of topics that interested

them. From this list they set out to do month long

research projects, culminating in a 20-50 page

paper for each.

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We included typing as a major subject because

of the increasing importance of computer skills in

today's workplace. Raising a child and turning

them out into the world without proper computer

skills is doing them a tremendous disservice.

Rarely is there a job available today that doesn't

require at least a minimum amount of computer

knowledge. So keep this in mind.

Our last subject to cover was Biblical Studies.

This we approached in a contextual way, wanting

the children to learn about the bible from the bible

itself, rather than from us or a Sunday school

lesson.

We were able to accomplish this by having the

kids read each book of the bible, take a test on

what they read and then write a summary for each.

Once they completed all 66 books, then they

embarked on a comprehensive inductive study of

each book of the bible, which culminated in a

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book of notes from each child. This was a

commentary of sorts, a compilation of their

interpretations and the founding of their own

theology and belief system of God and Jesus

Christ.

Once they have established a solid foundation

on the teachings of the apostles and the prophets

(the New Testament and Old Testament), they

again work through all 66 books, this time

following a contemporary (or ancient)

commentary series. This usually includes an

audio or video series that they work through and

take notes on.

The genius of the Self-Teaching Approach is

found in its flexibility and freedom to adapt to the

user of it. Anything can be added or subtracted.

One element can be substituted for another.

Subjects can be reorganized, schedules changed.

It blends together with any desired pursuit. After

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all, the curriculum designed here is to be used by

the student, not the student to be controlled and

stifled by the curriculum. Most of the time, if a

child realizes they have the freedom to learn, we

(and sometimes our ideas) just have to get out of

their way.

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56

CHAPTER FIVE

What About a High School Diploma?

This is the next important concern for most

parents who decide to take the leap and

homeschool their children. We see it on pretty

much every application we have ever filled out for

a job. Do you have a high school Diploma? If

not, too bad for you. No job, right? Well, its not

that simple. Luckily for us, in this day and age,

we have a few options available to us.

First, unless your child is going to be done with

their schooling this year, you get to relax again.

You have time to do your research and weigh your 57

options. Something else to consider is the reality

of education. Things change constantly,

especially toward more flexibility in providing an

education to a child. And there seems to be a

significant move toward technologically advanced

delivery methods, allowing homeschoolers to take

full advantage.

One major decision to make is if you want your

children to receive an accredited diploma from

your state. If you do not, then that is the end of

the discussion – for the most part. You still need

to begin organizing your schooling efforts and

chart your child's accomplishments. They will

need this later on for college and job applications.

We chose not to enroll our children in any kind

of formal secondary school. We figured that, as

college graduates, it would not matter much if

they had their high school diploma.

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If you do wish for them to graduate high school

through an official program, there are many

options available. You will need to review a

number of them to see which one will suit your

family and specific demands best. In our state we

have both private schools that are funded entirely

by the parents and then charter schools that

receive money from the state for each student, but

are vastly different than public education. Many

of these institutions have Distance Education

programs today. They can range from requiring

some campus attendance to a fully developed

online education.

These programs can serve a genuine need if you

(the parent) feel really uncomfortable about

knowing what your child should learn, or if you

are worried that you won't be able to teach them

higher level materials. Of course, using the Self-

Teaching Approach remedies this difficulty, as

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students are able to challenge themselves without

a ceiling. Your job remains the same: find quality

materials and then get out of the way.

Charter or private high schools can provide a

relief though. Especially those schools that have

advisers and teachers for your students, who can

often times provide an impartial opinion on

progress.

If you have decided not to enroll your child in

an accredited program, but wish to educate them

through the 12th grade, then there are a few things

to keep in mind.

First, as I mentioned before, you need to keep

track of what they are learning. The best option is

to have them keep track. Our kids have a

checklist of all the materials they are required to

complete before they graduate. They are

responsible to keep this list and present it every

time they complete a section. When we are

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confident that they are proficient with the given

material, we sign off and they move on.

It is also important to keep a growing record of

their work; content that represents their progress.

This can be done through official looking

transcript records, with assigned grades, or it can

be as simple as a journal you keep in a spiral

notebook. Just be sure to document by date and, if

possible, categorize by traditional subject matter

(this will make it easier for admissions offices).

An interesting aspect of the United States is the

homeschooling laws differ from state to state. In

Oregon, parents are not allowed to issue diplomas

and students are not allowed to list diplomas

earned through non-accredited institutions (such

as homeschooling). Vermont, on the other hand,

allows parents to simply print out their child's high

school diploma and it is viewed with the same

61

credibility as a diploma issued by the local public

school.

This was one reason why we decided to forgo

the high school certification altogether. We

learned about three years into homeschooling,

after gauging our children's progress, that they

would most likely be ready for college at the age

of 16. Our two youngest (who have never been in

public school) would probably be ready sooner.

At that point it became apparent to us just how

futile high school was. It then became our goal to

produce college graduates, not just graduates from

high school.

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CHAPTER SIX

The Dreaded Topic of Socialization

There is quite a lot of heated discussion

concerning homeschooling these days. But one

topic over all the rest seems to remain in the

forefront of every objection we receive about

teaching our children at home. This one objection

is socialization.

Let me first give you the definition of

socialization. It is defined as the “..adoption of the

behavior patterns of the surrounding culture..”

This means that those who advocate socialization

believe children should adopt the patterns of those

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around them. Once adopted, those same patterns

should be emulated and, thus, the culture is

perpetuated.

I would agree that this is both necessary and

healthy for all children to do. Unfortunately, one

element of this debate is often ignored or goes

unchallenged by the homeschooling community.

If a child is to watch and learn from his or her

surrounding culture, picking up these behaviors

and then repeating them, how does the child

differentiate between good behaviors and bad

ones? The answer is: they can't.

If you place a child in an environment of

negative influence, they are going to learn those

behaviors that are associated with that

environment. Likewise, if you place a child in an

environment of positive influence, the same is

true. The reality is, socialization is inherently

incapable of distinguishing between what it

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receives and assimilates. The bible talks about

this in 1 Corinthians 15:33 when it says, “..Bad

company corrupts good character..”

So, what then dictates what your children will

learn? Simply put, it will be the environment that

they are exposed to as they are growing up. You

cannot put them into a situation of negative

stimulus and expect them to behave. You cannot

strip away all responsibility and accountability and

still expect them to exercise any level of self-

control.

This is the great dilemma of public school.

Despite the continual lowering of the academic

standards each year, public education brings

together into one environment every

representation of the behavior spectrum. There

are good kids, bad kids, problem kids, abused

kids, rebellious kids, disillusioned kids, dangerous

kids and the list goes on and on. Placing your

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child into this environment is like playing Russian

roulette. There is no possible way you can

determine what the outcome will be. But you can

be assured that they are going to pick up as their

own both the bad and the good.

Myths about Socialization

There are a number of myths that have been

perpetuated over the years. These are continually

used against homeschoolers and their families to

paint a negative picture of what it is we actually

do and how we do it. Fortunately, the last decade

has seem the eradication of many of these myths

as homeschoolers time and again prove them

wrong.

One of these is the belief that children who are

not in public school will not learn the social skills

needed to make and keep relationships. It states

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that they will not be able to make friends and will,

in essence, be a social cripple. It is true that

children need to be exposed to other children

while they are growing up. But one element of

this argument that is rarely discussed is how

public school cripples children in the very same

way.

Only in public school will our children find

themselves in a room full of other children their

same age. Only in public school will they be

inadvertently taught that learning is not something

to strive for. It is the very social aspect of public

education that teaches this to them, as our kids

strive to “fit in” with the crowd. It becomes the

number one item on the agenda – not academic

pursuit. Peer pressure will be felt more during

these years than at any other time in their lives.

And it can carry with it some devastating

consequences.

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Homeschooling children make friends the same

way public school children do. They learn to play

together, interact and form bonds. The one

difference between them is that homeschoolers are

exposed to many different kinds of people

throughout the day. They talk to the clerk at the

store, the Veterinarian taking care of the family

pet, their grandparents, their neighbors, the gas

station attendant and the kids who live down the

street. How diverse is your own workplace?

Kids do not need to be herded into age brackets

and isolated into synthetic environments for

twelve years so they can learn how to function in

the real world. They need the real world.

Another objection we hear frequently is very

similar. There is the idea in the world at large that

children need to begin forming romantic

relationships very early. It is said that they need

to experience the courtship rituals, they need to

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feel the pain of love and loss before they strike out

into the world and pursue romantic relationships

“for real”. Unfortunately, what is not talked about

is how most of these activities are focused on one

thing: sexual intercourse.

This should not be surprising if we step back

and take a look at our society itself. Why wouldn't

we encourage our children to be sexually active,

date and practice forming romantic relationships?

We are a sexually over-stimulated culture. Sex is

everywhere! It is on our television shows, in our

advertisements. Sex Ed classes are even taught in

some of our churches and in self-help groups.

Pornography is the number one viewed content on

the internet and the ages of those viewing it is only

getting younger and younger.

We tend quantify this in terms of relative

morality. No, we don't want our children to be

sexually active, but we know they are going to so

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we need to also be sure they are sexually safe.

No, we don't want our child to pursue a

homosexual lifestyle, but because we have

convinced ourselves that it is genetic, our children

need to be open to the possibility.

This is not to say that it is wrong for children to

have sexual feelings as they grow up. On the

contrary, this is very natural and expected. It is

our culture that has boxed children into adolescent

lives for much too long. It used to be that a man

struck out on his own when he was still in his

teens. Now he is still considered a child at the age

of 17. Visit the average college campus and you

will see grown adults acting as if they were barely

14 or 15 years old. This is not a social right of

passage, it is a social catastrophe.

Drugs, sex, unnatural segregation, uncontrolled

environmental influences and the sheer lack of any

accountability are enough grounds to bring your

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children home for good. Add to this pandemic the

incredible disaster of budget cuts that have

plagued school districts and you are lucky your

child's school has a 1 to 20 teacher to student ratio.

Typically the rate is much higher as they pack in

more students and reduce the number of overall

teachers.

The Right Kind of Socialization

It is true that children need to be socialized.

They need to make friends, learn how to work

with others, and hopefully learn from the mistakes

we made in the past.

But this does not mean they need to be shackled

with the experiences of primary and secondary

public education. It is simply a trap to wrangle

money from the Federal and State governments to

support an already dead institution.

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The kind of socialization a child needs can be

created right at home. Children need to be talked

to. We need to really listen to them. They need to

feel included and they need to have limits set for

them that carry consequences if and when those

limits are broken.

Children need a safe environment that is

conducive to the natural learning process. They

do not need to be tied down to grade levels. They

do not need busy work and they should not be held

back because the rest of the class is not ready.

Children should be sheltered from the synthetic

culture of modern education, but not from the

reality of the world around them. They need to

know what is on the Internet. They need to know

how babies are made. They need to know that

many people in this world have chosen to

participate in a myriad of different lifestyles, many

of which are considered taboo.

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It is up to us to teach them and talk to them

about these things. If left to the public school

system you never know what you will get.

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74

CHAPTER SEVEN

Sending Kids Into the World

It is frequently something that is not talked

about or even thought of until its too late. Besides

academic excellence, social well adjustment and

college acceptance, there is one constant in the

world of raising children: they will leave.

It is not only inevitable but it is responsible.

Parent, stop living through the lives of your

children. Stop quantifying your self worth by

your child's accomplishments. Your children are

not pet projects. They do not justify your integrity

or your abilities as a parent.

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Every year a new set of children grow into

adulthood. And with every one of those groups

there are parents who are crushed by the actions of

their children. Whether it be drinking at a party,

going to jail, rape, murder, drug abuse - there is a

family shattered by the actions of their children.

Likewise, there is with every generation

children who blossom and thrive in spite of the

way in which they were raised. Be it the roles

reversed and the parents are the ones who bring

shame to the family name, these children

persevere and become outstanding exceptions to

the rule of parenting.

Why is it this way? How can we avoid raising

children who fail? The answer is not really

something parents like to hear. The reality is,

there is no sure way to avoid it. There is no

guarantee that your children, no matter how you

raise them, will make enough right decisions to

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come out on top. One stupid mistake can cost a

person so much – sometimes it can cost them

everything. Most of the time there are no

explanations that will fit for why people make the

choices they do. Unfortunately, everyone pays the

consequences.

But there are some things we can and need to do

when raising our kids that will hedge up our hopes

for them. Even though we have to recognize that

they will leave and make the final decision on

what they will do with what we have given them,

it is still our responsibility to provide it. Sadly,

few children these days receive much of what we

are about to discuss.

Tools for Success

The first and most important tool that a child

needs before they leave your home is a strong

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spiritual foundation in the Bible. Notice that I did

not say in Christianity, in Church or in Religion.

Rather, a child needs to read the Word and learn it

for himself. Hold your tongue as much as you

can. Refer them back to the text often and let the

Holy Spirit be their guide and their teacher.

Now, if you are taken aback by this first

recommendation then I have to ask you a question.

Do you read the bible? Do you know Jesus

Christ? Do you profess Him as Lord of your life

and believe that God raised Him back to life on

the third day? If not, I have another book for you

to read after this one. It is called, Cutting

Through the Red Tape of Christianity by Steven

Veach. It will explain to you who Jesus was, who

He is and who He is going to be. It also clears up

the red tape that so often accompanies the modern

churches today in Christianity.

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The next tool a child needs before they leave

your home is an intimate understanding of

personal finance. It is never too soon for a child to

learn about mortgage payments and car loans. It is

good for them to take over the household bills for

a few months when they are teenagers so they can

get a real taste of life outside of the comforting

walls of Mom and Dad's home. Let them see how

much the doctor bills are. They need to know how

much you spent last Christmas. A child can excel

at Algebra or Calculus, but if he cannot

consistently balance a checkbook he is doomed to

fail. Providing them with much practice before

they are on their own is the only solution. For this

subject I recommend the book, Real Financial

Freedom: Finding Enough and Enjoying It by

Steven Veach.

Another tool that children need before they

leave home is the ability to have and maintain an

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open dialog with you. Talk to your children. Talk

to them privately. Talk to them altogether as a

family. Don't treat them like children and shelter

them from the stark realities of the world around

them. If they are not among the muck and mire

now they will be very soon. They need to know

what this world is all about. And they need

someone they can trust. They need someone who

is not going to judge them, but will listen and will

share with them their experiences as if it were

their own.

Children want you to love them. They want

you to care for them. But there is a time when

children grow up and become adults. When this

occurs, they still want your love, they still want

you to care. But they also want you to step back

enough for them to live their lives. Your children

need to be prepared for this eventual reality. They

need to realize early on that you will not always be

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there to make choices for them. They need to

develop the decision making and problem solving

skills that will take them through the harsh

wilderness of life. Don't delay in this.

The next tool a child needs before leaving

home, especially in this day and age, is a thorough

understanding of computer technology. There

literally are few to no jobs in the market today that

do not somehow make use of computers. We have

talked about this earlier. By the time your

children are raised and on their own – there will be

no jobs left that do not require computer

knowledge. It is simply a fact of life.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not talking about

turning your child loose with a computer

connected to the internet and say, “He's learning to

use the computer!” No, children need to learn

how to use the internet, not be left to his own

devices. Your child needs to be taught the proper

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uses and they also need to learn about the abuses

too. They need to learn how to use a word

processor, a spreadsheet, a browser and email.

They need to understand the purpose of chat

rooms (and the reality of them) as well as the

dangers of online predators and scams. They need

to be educated on how the world uses the internet;

the good the bad and the ugly aspects. It is the

reality that your children are soon to step into.

A tool that is very important for children to

receive before they leave home is a complete

understanding of drugs and alcohol use and abuse.

This is simply the facts of life. If you do not

educate your children someone else will. At some

point in your child's life they will be approached

and offered drugs or a drink after work. Don't do

what most parents do and tell your children to

“just say no”. Explain to them how you feel. Tell

them all the sides to the situation. Believe me

when I say, your children are smart. They will 82

figure it out pretty quickly if you are not giving

them full disclosure. And if they catch you doing

it, they will resent you for it.

Teach them about drugs. Show them what they

do, what their consequences are. Explain to them

the truth of why people abuse them and teach

them right from wrong. If you don't teach them

the right way, it is very likely they will learn the

wrong one.

Now we come to a tool that is rarely taught to

children growing up these days. This can be

described a number of ways. Children need to be

taught what it means to grow up. Boys need to be

taught how to be men, husbands and fathers. Girls

need to learn how to be women, wives and

mothers. They need to learn that integrity is

something worth striving for and that a work ethic

is still admired in our culture.

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Boys need to learn that women are not objects

for sex. They need to be taught that the opposite

sex should not be exploited or demoralized. A

great example to use is Ephesians 5:25-33. Girls

should be taught likewise that men are not to be

usurped, not to be chagrined, but should be loved

and afforded the respect and honor due them as

the head of the home.

These attributes are not typically found in our

culture today, much less are they taught in the

public school system. If only by passive

assimilation our children come to accept society as

men and women being self-centered, driven by

base animal urges. They are taught that we are

derived from primates and that there is no guilt or

shame for our actions or activities as long as no

one else is being hurt in the process. This is an

inherent flaw in the system and should be avoided

or circumvented at all costs.

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In The End

It is the end of the race that counts the most.

Will our children make us proud? We hope and

pray that they will be successful at life, often times

we want them to be more successful than us.

The bottom line reads well, though. In the end

it is up to them. They will decide very early out

what kind of adults they will be. Some will take

off out of the gates with a start and sprint through

to the finish line with ease. They will be

enthralled in the life God has given them. They

will take advantage of every opportunity that He

affords. Others will not hear the firing of the gun

but still do okay, while a few will have quite a bit

of trouble throughout the entire race.

The reality is that, much like our own lives, our

children will be the commanders of their own

fates. They will make the difficult decisions and

they will reap the reward or consequences.

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Parents can and should provide a solid

foundation for them when they are young. They

should receive a quality academic education and

they should be provided with the tools necessary

to navigate through the trials and troubles of this

fallen world. Most importantly, your children

need to be raised, not just turned loose and

allowed to grow up.

Despite your best efforts, though, your children

were born with something called free-will. Its up

to them, we just need to ensure they have a good

start.

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CHAPTER EIGHT

A Book List

Here is a list of some of the books we required

our children to read as they were growing up.

Pick and choose what you want them to learn the

most. Believe me when I say they will make up

the rest on their own. Have fun!

McGuffey Reader Series (7 Books)The Bible

The Boxcar Children SeriesChristopher Columbus

Life on the Oregon Trail

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The New Pilgrim's ProgresBobbsey Twin SeriesG.A. Henty Books

Books on Survival SkillsJack London Books

The Swiss Family RobinsonThe Hardy Boy Series

Books about Isaac NewtonAlice in Wonderland

Basic Works of AristotleAny History Book

Books on CreationismBooks on Evolution

Books on Local HistoryBasic Car Care

Basic Law BooksComplete Works of Josephus20,000 Leagues Under the SeaThe Princess and the Goblin

Investing for the FutureAcres of Diamonds

Paradise Lost88

Mein KampfWealth of Nations

How to Win Friends and Influence PeopleThe Travels of a T-Shirt

Lord of the FliesMoby Dick

Unmasking EvolutionAny Book by C.S. Lewis

Relativity: The Special and General TheoriesThe Temple and its Ministry

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OTHER BOOKS BY

STEVEN VEACH

In The Meadow: A Novel

The Preparation (Bk#1)

A Labor of Love: Raising our Boxers Dogs

How to Homeschool

A High School Poet

A First Century Church for Today

Order These Titles at: http://stores.lulu.com/cabinhermit