The Dream RiverViviana Di Chiara

The Dream RiverViviana Di Chiara

I am a dream.I dont know why, or where I come from, but I surely know where Im heading.Everything began not long ago. Before that, I was just a drop, led by the gentle but restless stream of an endless river: the river of dreams.I call it a river but its really not.It doesnt flow in any bed, its doesnt have banks, sources or deltas visible on the horizon.It simply flows in the middle of nowhere.There is no up, down, left or right.Its not even made of water, but by a constant stream of objects of every kind.

Each one of them is a forgotten dream: hopes, fears, wishes that never came trueand Im one of them.Is there a reason why I look like this? I dont know: I can think, I can talk, move, laugh and cry, while the other are just objects; or maybe they think and suffer as much as I do, but they dont know how to show it. I have to admit that I like this option far better, for my own reasons.But lets get back to business.Despite my differences, for a long time I have just floated along with the other things, still as an empty puppet, eaten by a void sensation inside myself I could not explain.Then I saw it.

It was nothing special, just a big, purple umbrella, but it had an aura about itselfnothing visible to the eye, but I was inexplicably drawn to it.For the first time in forever I tried to move.At first nothing seemed to happen: its difficult to perceive movement when your feet dont touch the ground. Then I saw my arms slowly moving, in the idle attempt to swim upstream.The more I tried, the stronger my movement became.I HAD to reach that umbrella, I just had no choice.I started to grab everything, until I was practically jumping from thing to thing, shameless.Then I got it: I thrust my hand forward and with a swift movement I grabbed the umbrellas handle.

Utter satisfaction washed over me, but I had no time to dwell on the new sensation because what

happened next caught me totally unpreparedI started to fall, as if the power that sustained me up

to that moment just disappeared.Suddenly all the objects were behind me,

far away in the distance.What was happening?

Where would I end up? Was I going to plummet forever?

Suddenly I realized that shadows and colours were rising around me. Voices, sounds and smells hit me

like a wave and I closed my eyes.It seemed to me that my fall was slowing down,

till it stopped: my feet met a surface of some kind without a sound.

When I opened my eyes, I was staring at a new world.

I had no clue of my whereabouts, or my destination.In that moment it didnt matter. I stayed still, unable to move.The things my eyes were watching, where impossible for my head to understand, and too grand for my heart to contain.In spite of the stillness that had possessed me up to that moment, a pulsing life was surrounding me , with living people that moved, danced and sang like one.Under my feet there was solid stone, covered by confetti of every colour that gathered at the sides of the streets where tall buildings rose from the ground, darkened by smoke, but also coloured by the orange veil of twilight: a night of celebration was coming.Why was I there? I was not a part of that world, I could feel it clearly.A rift separated me from my surroundings, in that world I didnt exist, and I knew somehow that the other people could not see me.

Finally I took my first step and I went on for a long time, searching for the reason why the umbrella had brought there.At some point something at the corner of my eye caught my attention, I turned my head startled and I saw a gigantic figure hovering on a small crowd swirling and spinning a parasol. At the creatures feet there was a little girl who mimed the artist playing with an umbrella eerily familiar.There was no doubt: around the girls umbrella there was the same golden aura that surrounded mine, and the same strength drew me towards it.Without holding back any longer I touched the girls umbrella: a light sprang from our contact and the rift opened up.

The space around me blurred, and time seemed to stop.A stream of images began to flow under my eyes: they rose from nowhere, and disappeared into nothing after a few seconds, like a movie.The girl started to dance again in a garden turning and turning again: One day I too will be beautiful like the lady on stilts! I want to be free just like her, and like her, I want to fly! She was saying, and like the tall dancer with the parasol the girl flew, carried by a golden cloud, because what I was looking at was not reality, but her dream.

Then years passed like seconds and I watched how the little girl grew into her teens and the umbrella turned into just a shelter from the rain that smelled of old memories, until it was forgotten and then lost forever.Its believed that childrens dreams are easily left behind, seen as too childish, or impossible to come true.This doesnt mean, though, that in this abandon hasnt caused any suffering, especially if you look at it from a dreams point of view.Who can say then that the one who deserted his own dream is not going to grieve as well? I could see now the woman the flying girl had become: a normal woman, seemingly serene.With a flick of my hand I stopped the drift of memories.The woman was sound asleep.I moved forward and I step beyond the rift again, reaching her in the only space that could receive us both: her dream.

A single look finally told me why the umbrella had brought me there.The sweet and happy atmosphere of her childhood dreams had changed drastically.Heavy and dark shadows had filled every space, draining the light and leaving everything sad and empty.There I spotted her, the small girl who had grown up, oppressed by her duties, her empty days of stress and boredom.A dream is just a small fantasy that may appear useless and as we grow up we tend to leave it behind, freeing space for new things.What we leave behind, though, is a part of ourselves, an irreplaceable piece without which well never be complete.We keep searching for it in vain, and in the end emptiness will get old of us.This for a dream is unacceptable.The same force that woke me up rushed in my arms again and I closed the umbrella with a snap, holding it up in the air: it wanted to get back to its owner and I was going to help it along.Together we dissolved the shadows that fled away scared by the mere sight of our light, and we managed to reach the woman.

Its over - I told her youre safe!She finally noticed us.Who are you?I handed over the umbrella into her hands, without answering.Trembling she took it, and she looked at it for a long time, crying.Where did you find it?I pointed upwards and together we looked at the river of stars that divided the sky in two halves, like a rift.The milky way?This isnt reality- I said finally- Its a dream. And those up there are not stars, its the dream river. You had forgotten your dream, and it wanted desperately to come back to you, so I helped it.She looked in turn at me and at the umbrella, trying to understand the meaning of my words.Who are you? She repeated.A dreamAnd wheres your owner?I didnt know the answer, so I lowered my eyes and she smiled.Take this, its your now, she said, handing me the umbrella I want you to have it. It led you to me ad I hope that one day it will lead you back to your owner as well.I hesitated at first, but then I took the umbrella with both hands.

I could sense that it was fine for my friend as well, its duties were fulfilled, its owner was complete again and she was going to carry her dream in her heart for the rest of her life.When I was a step away from crossing the rift to get back to the river, the woman told me something else, that had spurred me on up to this day:Find your owner, little one, because if it had been up to me I would never have let go of my dreams: life drags us deep down sometimes, forcing us to leave behind what really matters. I am sure that whoever left you desperately needs you to get back to him, because youre irreplaceable.

Now Im here, sailing in the dream river with my umbrella.Together, we help other dreams to find their owners while we search for hints about my own.Im going to find him. Ill find him no matter how long it takes, because Im his dream, and Im irreplaceable.