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8/10/2019 Tolstoi - Father Sergius.doc http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/tolstoi-father-sergiusdoc 1/66 Father Sergius by Lev Nikolayevich Tolstoy Published in 1898 Translated by Louise and Aylmer Maude istributed by The Tolstoy Library htt!"##home$aol$com#Tolstoy%8 e&mail" Tolstoy%8'aol$com ( (n Petersburg in the 18)*s a sur!rising event occurred$ An o++icer o+ the ,uirassier Li+e -uards. a handsome !rince /ho everyone !redicted /ould become aide& de&cam! to the 0m!eror Nicholas ( and have a brilliant career. le+t the service. broke o++ his engagement to a beauti+ul maid o+ honour. a +avourite o+ the 0m!resss. gave his small estate to his sister. and retired to a monastery to become a monk$ This event a!!eared e2traordinary and ine2!licable to those /ho did not kno/ his inner motives. but +or Prince Ste!an 3asatsky himsel+ it all occurred so naturally that he could not imagine ho/ he could have acted other/ise$ 4is +ather. a retired colonel o+ the -uards. had

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Father Sergius

by Lev Nikolayevich Tolstoy

Published in 1898

Translated by Louise and Aylmer Maude

istributed by The Tolstoy Library

htt!"##home$aol$com#Tolstoy%8

e&mail" Tolstoy%8'aol$com

(

(n Petersburg in the 18)*s a sur!rising event

occurred$ An o++icer o+ the ,uirassier Li+e -uards. a

handsome !rince /ho everyone !redicted /ould become aide&

de&cam! to the 0m!eror Nicholas ( and have a brilliant

career. le+t the service. broke o++ his engagement to a

beauti+ul maid o+ honour. a +avourite o+ the 0m!ress s.

gave his small estate to his sister. and retired to a

monastery to become a monk$

This event a!!eared e2traordinary and ine2!licable

to those /ho did not kno/ his inner motives. but +or

Prince Ste!an 3asatsky himsel+ it all occurred so

naturally that he could not imagine ho/ he could have

acted other/ise$

4is +ather. a retired colonel o+ the -uards. had

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died /hen Ste!an /as t/elve. and sorry as his mother /as

to !art +rom her son. she entered him at the Military

,ollege as her deceased husband had intended$

The /ido/ hersel+. /ith her daughter 5arvara. moved

to Petersburg to be near her son and have him /ith her

+or the holidays$

The boy /as distinguished both by his brilliant

ability and by his immense sel+&esteem$ 4e /as +irst

both in his studies && es!ecially in mathematics. o+

/hich he /as !articularly +ond && and also in drill and

in riding$ Thought o+ more than average height. he /as

handsome and agile. and he /ould have been an altogether

e2em!lary cadet had it not been +or his 6uick tem!er$ 4e

/as remarkably truth+ul. and neither dissi!ated nor

addicted to drink$ The only +aults that marred his

conduct /ere +its o+ +ury to /hich he /as sub7ect and

during /hich he lost control o+ himsel+ and became like

a /ild animal$ 4e once nearly thre/ out o+ the /indo/

another cadet /ho had begun to tease him about his

collection o+ minerals$ n another occasion he came

almost com!letely to grie+ by +linging a /hole dish o+

cutlets at an o++icer /ho /as acting as ste/ard.

attacking him and. it /as said. striking him +or having

broken his /ord and told a bare+aced lie$ 4e /ould

certainly have been reduced to the ranks had not the

irector o+ the ,ollege hushed u! the /hole matter and

dismissed the ste/ard$

y the time he /as eighteen he had +inished his

,ollege course and received a commission as lieutenant in

an aristocratic regiment o+ the -uards$

The 0m!eror Nicholas Pavlovich :Nicholas ;< had

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noticed him /hile he /as still at the ,ollege. and

continued to take notice o+ him in the regiment. and it

/as on this account that !eo!le !redicted +or him an

a!!ointment as aide&de&cam! to the 0m!eror$ 3asatsky

himsel+ strongly desired it. not +rom ambition only but

chie+ly because since his cadet days he had been

!assionately devoted to Nicholas Pavlovich$ The 0m!eror

had o+ten visited the Military ,ollege and every time

3asatsky sa/ that tall erect +igure. /ith breast e2!anded

in its military overcoat. entering /ith brisk ste!. sa/

the cro!!ed side&/hiskers. the moustache. the a6uiline

nose. and heard the sonorous voice e2changing greetings

/ith the cadets. he /as sei=ed by the same ra!ture that

he e2!erienced later on /hen he met the /oman he loved$

(ndeed. his !assionate adoration o+ the 0m!eror /as even

stronger" he /ished to sacri+ice something &&

everything. even himsel+ && to !rove his com!lete

devotion$ And the 0m!eror Nicholas /as conscious o+

evoking this ra!ture and deliberately aroused it$ 4e

!layed /ith the cadets. surrounded himsel+ /ith them.

treating them sometimes /ith childish sim!licity.

sometimes as a +riend. and then again /ith ma7estic

solemnity$ A+ter that a++air /ith the o++icer. Nicholas

Pavlovich said nothing to 3asatsky. but /hen the latter

a!!roached he /aved him a/ay theatrically. +ro/ned. shook

his +inger. and a+ter/ards /hen leaving said" >?emember

that ( kno/ everything$ There are some things ( /ould

rather not kno/. but they remain here.> and he !ointed to

his heart$

@hen on leaving college the cadets /ere received by

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the 0m!eror. he did not again re+er to 3asatsky s

o++ence. but told them all. as /as his custom that they

should serve him and the +atherland loyally. that he

/ould al/ays be their best +riend. and that /hen

necessary they might a!!roach him direct$ All the cadets

/ere as usual greatly moved. and 3asatsky even shed

tears. remembering the !ast. and vo/ed that he /ould

serve his beloved Tsar /ith all his soul$

@hen 3asatsky took u! his commission his mother

moved /ith her daughter +irst to Mosco/ then to their

country estate$ 3asatsky gave hal+ his !ro!erty to his

sister and ke!t only enough to maintain himsel+ in the

e2!ensive regiment he had 7oined$

To all a!!earance he /as 7ust an ordinary. brilliant

young o++icer o+ the -uards making a career +or himsel+

but intense and com!le2 strivings /ent on /ithin him$

From early childhood his e++orts had seemed to be very

varied. but essentially they /ere all one and the same$

4e tried in everything he took u! to attain such success

and !er+ection as /ould evoke !raise and sur!rise$

@hether it /as his studies or his military e2ercises. he

took them u! and /orked at them till he /as !raised and

held u! as an e2am!le to others$ Mastering one sub7ect

he took u! another. and obtained +irst !lace in his

studies$ For e2am!le. /hile still at ,ollege he noticed

in himsel+ an a/k/ardness in French conversation. and

contrived to master French till he s!oke it as /ell as

?ussian. and then he took u! chess and became an

e2cellent !layer$

A!art +rom his main vocation. /hich /as the service

o+ his Tsar and the +atherland. he al/ays set himsel+

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some !articular aim. and ho/ever unim!ortant it /as.

devoted himsel+ com!letely to it and lived +or it until

it /as accom!lished$

And as soon as it /as attained another aim /ould

immediately !resent itsel+. re!lacing its !redecessor$

this !assion +or distinguishing himsel+. or +or

accom!lishing something in order to distinguish himsel+.

+illed his li+e$ n taking u! his commission he set

himsel+ to ac6uire the utmost !er+ection in kno/ledge o+

the service. and very soon became a model o++icer. though

still /ith the same +ault o+ ungovernable irascibility.

/hich here in the service again led him to commit actions

inimical to his success$ Then he took to reading. having

once in conversation in society +elt himsel+ de+icient in

general education && and again achieved his !ur!ose$

Then. /ishing to secure a brilliant !osition in high

society. he learnt to dance e2cellently and very soon /as

invited to all the balls in the best circles. and to some

o+ their evening gatherings$ ut this did not satis+y

him" he /as accustomed to being +irst. and in this

society /as +ar +rom being so$

The highest society then consisted. and ( think

al/ays and every/here does consist. o+ +our sorts o+

!eo!le" rich !eo!le /ho are received at ,ourt. !eo!le

not /ealthy but born and brought u! in ,ourt circles.

rich !eo!le /ho ingratiate themselves into the ,ourt set.

and !eo!le neither rich nor belonging to the ,ourt but

/ho ingratiate themselves into the +irst and second sets$

3asatsky did not belong to the +irst t/o sets. but

/as readily /elcomed in the others$ n entering society

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he determined to have relations /ith some society lady.

and to his o/n sur!rise 6uickly accom!lished this

!ur!ose$ 4e soon reali=ed. ho/ever. that the circles in

/hich he moved /ere not the highest. and that though he

/as received in the highest s!heres he did not belong to

them$ They /ere !olite to him. but sho/ed by their /hole

manner that they had their o/n set and that he /as not o+

it$ And 3asatsky /ished to belong to that inner circle$

To attain that end it /ould be necessary to be an aide&

de&cam! to the 0m!eror && /hich he e2!ected to become &&

or to marry into that e2clusive set. /hich he resolved to

do$ And his choice +ell on a beauty belonging to the

,ourt. /ho not merely belonged to the circle into /hich

he /ished to be acce!ted. but /hose +riendshi! /as

coveted by the very highest !eo!le and those most +irmly

established in that highest circle$ this /as ,ountess

3orotkova$ 3asatsky began to !ay court to her. and not

merely +or the sake o+ his career$ She /as e2tremely

attractive and he soon +ell in love /ith her$ At +irst

she /as noticeably cool to/ards him. but then suddenly

changed and became gracious. and her mother gave him

!ressing invitations to visit them$ 3asatsky !ro!osed

and /as acce!ted$ 4e /as sur!rised at the +acility /ith

/hich he attained such ha!!iness$ ut though he noticed

something strange and unusual in the behaviour to/ards

him o+ both mother and daughter. he /as blinded by being

so dee!ly in love. and did not reali=e /hat almost the

/hole to/n kne/ && namely. that his +iancee had been the

em!eror Nicholas s mistress the !revious year$

T/o /eeks be+ore the day arranged +or the /edding.

3asatsky /as at Tsarskoe Selo at his +iancee s country

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!lace$ (t /as a hot day in May$ 4e and his betrothed

had /alked about the garden and /ere sitting on a bench

in a shady linden alley$ Mary s /hite muslin dress

suited her !articularly /ell. and she seemed the

!ersoni+ication o+ innocence and love as she sat. no/

bending her head. no/ ga=ing u! at the very tall and

handsome man /ho /as s!eaking to her /ith !articular

tenderness and sel+&restraint. as i+ he +eared by /ord or

gesture to o++end or sully her angelic !urity$

3asatsky belonged to those men o+ the eighteen&

+orties :they are no/ no longer to be +ound< /ho /hile

deliberately and /ithout any conscientious scru!les

condoning im!urity in themselves. re6uired ideal and

angelic !urity in their /omen. regarded all unmarried

/omen o+ their circle as !ossessed o+ such !urity. and

treated them accordingly$ There /as much that /as +alse

and harm+ul in this outlook. as concerning the la2ity the

men !ermitted themselves. but in regard to the /omen that

old&+ashioned vie/ :shar!ly di++ering +rom that held by

young !eo!le today /ho see in every girl merely a +emale

seeking a mate< /as. ( think. o+ value$ The girl.

!erceiving such adoration. endeavoured /ith more or less

success to be goddesses$

Such /as the vie/ 3asatsky held o+ /omen. and that

/as ho/ he regarded his +iancee$ 4e /as !articularly in

love that day. but did not e2!erience any sensual desire

+or her$ n the contrary he regarded her /ith tender

adoration as something unattainable$

4e rose to his +ull height. standing be+ore her /ith

both hands on his sabre$

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>( have only no/ reali=ed /hat ha!!iness a man can

e2!erienceB And it is you. my darling. /ho have given me

this ha!!iness.> he said /ith a timid smile$

0ndearments had not yet become usual bet/een them.

and +eeling himsel+ morally in+erior he +elt terri+ied at

this stage to use them to such an angel$

>(t is thanks to you that ( have come to kno/

mysel+$ ( have learnt that ( am better than ( thought$>

>( have kno/n that +or a long time$ That is /hy (

began to love you$>

Nightingales trilled near by and the +resh lea+age

rustled. moved by a !assing bree=e$

4e took her hand and kissed it. and tears came into

his eyes$

She understood that he /as thanking her +or having

said she loved him$ 4e silently took a +e/ ste!s u! and

do/n. and then a!!roacher her again and sat do/n$

>Cou kno/$$$( have to tell you$$$( /as not

disinterested /hen ( began to make love to you$ ( /anted

to get into society but later$$$ho/ unim!ortant that

became in com!arison /ith you && /hen ( got to kno/ you$

Cou are not angry /ith me +or thatD>

She did not re!ly but merely touched his hand$ 4e

understood that this meant" >No. ( am not angry$>

>Cou said$$$> 4e hesitated$ (t seemed too bold to

say$ >Cou said that you began to love me$ ( believe it

&& but there is something that troubles you and checks

your +eeling$ @hat is itD>

>Ces && no/ or neverB> thought she$ >4e is bound to

kno/ o+ it any/ay$ ut no/ he /ill not +orsake me$ Ah.

i+ he should. it /ould be terribleB> And she thre/ a

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loving glance at his tall. noble. !o/er+ul +igure$ She

loved him no/ more than she had loved the Tsar. and a!art

+rom the (m!erial dignity /ould not have !re+erred the

0m!eror to him$

>ListenB ( cannot deceive you$ ( have to tell you$

Cou ask /hat it isD (t is that ( have loved be+ore$>

She again laid her hand on his /ith an im!loring

gesture$ 4e /as silent$

>Cou /ant to kno/ /ho it /asD (t /as && the

0m!eror$>

>@e all love him$ ( can imagine you. a schoolgirl

at the (nstitute$$$>

>No. it /as later$ ( /as in+atuated. but it

!assed$$$ ( must tell you$$$>

>@ell. /hat o+ itD>

>No. it /as not sim!ly && > She covered her +ace

/ith her hands$

>@hatD Cou gave yoursel+ to himD>

She /as silent$

>4is mistressD>

She did not ans/er$

4e s!rang u! and stood be+ore her /ith trembling

7a/s. !ale as death$ 4e no/ remembered ho/ the 0m!eror.

meeting him on the Nevsky. had amiably congratulated him$

> -od. /hat have ( doneB StivaB>

> on t touch meB on t touch meB h. ho/ it

!ainsB>

4e turned a/ay and /ent to the house$ There he met

her mother$

>@hat is the matter. PrinceD ( $$$ > She became

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silent on seeing his +ace$ The blood had suddenly rushed

to his head$

>Cou kne/ it. and used me to shield themB (+ you

/eren t a /oman$$$B> he cried. li+ting his enormous +ist.

and turning aside he ran a/ay$

4ad his +iancee s lover been a !rivate !erson he

/ould have killed him. but it /as his beloved Tsar$

Ne2t day he a!!lied both +or +urlough and his

discharge. and !ro+essing to be ill. so as to see no one.

he /ent a/ay to the country$

4e s!ent the summer at his village arranging his

a++airs$ @hen summer /as over he did not return to

Petersburg. but entered a monastery and there became a

monk$

4is mother /rote to try to dissuade him +rom this

decisive ste!. but he re!lied that he +elt -od s call

/hich transcended all other considerations$ nly his

sister. /ho /as as !roud and ambitious as he. understood

him$

She understood that he had become a monk in order to

be above those /ho considered themselves his su!erior$

And she understood him correctly$ y becoming a monk he

sho/ed contem!t +or all that seemed most im!ortant to

others and had seemed so to him /hile he /as in the

service. and he no/ ascended a height +rom /hich he could

look do/n on those he had +ormerly envied$$$$ ut it /as

not this alone. as his sister 5arvara su!!osed. that

in+luenced him$ There /as also in him something else &&

a sincere religious +eeling /hich 5arvara did not kno/.

/hich intert/ined itsel+ /ith the +eeling o+ !ride and

the desire +or !re&eminence. and guided him$ 4is

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disillusionment /ith Mary. /hom he had thought o+ angelic

!urity. and his sense o+ in7ury. /ere so strong that they

brought him to des!air. and the des!air led him && to

/hatD To -od. to his childhood s +aith /hich had never

been destroyed in him$

((

3asatsky entered the monastery on the +east o+ the

(ntercession o+ the lessed 5irgin$ The Abbot o+ that

monastery /as a gentleman by birth. a learned /riter and

a ;starets;. that is. he belonged to that succession o+

monks originating in @alachia /ho each choose a director

and teacher /hom they im!licitly obey$ This su!erior had

been a disci!le o+ the ;starets; Ambrose. /ho /as a

disci!le o+ Makarius. /ho /as a disci!le o+ the ;starets;

Leonid. /ho /as a disci!le o+ Paissy 5elichkovsky$

To this Abbot 3asatsky submitted himsel+ as to his

chosen director$ 4ere in the monastery. besides the

+eeling o+ ascendancy over others that such a li+e gave

him. he +elt much as he had done in the /orld" he +ound

satis+action in attaining the greatest !ossible

!er+ection out/ardly as /ell as in/ardly$ As in the

regiment he had been not merely an irre!roachable o++icer

but had even e2ceeded his duties and /idened the borders

o+ !er+ection. so also as a monk he tried to be !er+ect.

and /as al/ays industrious. abstemious. submissive. and

meek. as /ell as !ure both in deed and in thought. and

obedient$ This last 6uality in !articular made li+e +ar

easier +or him$ (+ many o+ the demands o+ li+e in the

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monastery. /hich /as near the ca!ital and much

+re6uented. did not !lease him and /ere tem!tations to

him. they /ere all nulli+ied by obedience" >(t is not

+or me to reason my business is to do the task set me.

/hether it be standing beside the relics. singing in the

choir. or making u! accounts in the monastery guest&

house$> All !ossibility o+ doubt about anything /as

silenced by obedience to the ;starets;$ 4ad it not been

+or this. he /ould have been o!!ressed by the length and

monotony o+ the church services. the bustle o+ the many

visitors. and the bad 6ualities o+ the other monks$ As

it /as. he not only bore it all 7oy+ully but +ound in it

solace and su!!ort$ >( don t kno/ /hy it is necessary to

hear the same !rayers several times a day. but ( kno/

that it is necessary and kno/ing this ( +ind 7oy in

them$> 4is director told him that as material +ood is

necessary +or the maintenance o+ the li+e o+ the body. so

s!iritual +ood && the church !rayers && is necessary +or

the maintenance o+ the s!iritual li+e$ 4e believed this.

and though the church services. +or /hich he had to get

u! early in the morning. /ere a di++iculty. they

certainly calmed him and gave him 7oy$ this /as the

result o+ his consciousness o+ humility. and the

certainty that /hatever he had to do. being +i2ed by the

;starets;. /as right$

The interest o+ his li+e consisted not only in an

ever greater and greater sub7ugation o+ his /ill. but in

the attainment o+ all the ,hristian virtues. /hich at

+irst seemed to him easily attainable$ 4e had given his

/hole estate to his sister and did not regret it. he had

no !ersonal claims. humility to/ards his in+eriors /as

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not merely easy +or him but a++orded him !leasure$ 0ven

victory over the sins o+ the +lesh. greed and lust. /as

easily attained$ 4is director had s!ecially /arned him

against the latter sit. but 3asatsky +elt +ree +rom it

and /as glad$

ne thing only tormented him && the remembrance o+

his +iancee and not merely the remembrance but the vivid

image o+ /hat might have been$ (nvoluntarily he recalled

a lady he kne/ /ho had been a +avourite o+ the 0m!eror s.

but had a+ter/ards married and become an admirable /i+e

and mother$ The husband had a high !osition. in+luence

and honour. and a good and !enitent /i+e$

(n his better hours 3asatsky /as not disturbed by

such thoughts. and /hen he recalled them at such times he

/as merely glad to +eel that the tem!tation /as !ast$

ut there /ere moments /hen all that made u! his !resent

li+e suddenly gre/ dim be+ore him. moments /hen. i+ he

did not cease to believe in the aims he had set himsel+.

he ceased to see them and could evoke no con+idence in

them but /as sei=ed by a remembrance o+. and && terrible

to say && a regret +or. the change o+ li+e he had made$

The only thing that saved him in that state o+ mind

/as obedience and /ork. and the +act that the /hole day

/as occu!ied by !rayer$ 4e /ent through the usual +orms

o+ !rayer. he bo/ed in !rayer. he even !rayed more than

usual. but it /as li!&service only and his soul /as not

in it$ This condition /ould continue +or a day. or

sometimes +or t/o days. and /ould then !ass o+ itsel+$

ut those days /ere dread+ul$ 3asatsky +elt that he /as

neither in his o/n hands nor in -od s. but /as sub7ect to

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something else$ all he could do then /as to obey the

;starets;. to restrain himsel+. to undertake nothing. and

sim!ly to /ait$ (n general all this time he lived not by

his o/n /ill but by that o+ the ;starets;. and in this

obedience he +ound a s!ecial tran6uility$

So he lived in his +irst monastery +or seven years$

At the end o+ the third year he received the tonsure and

/as ordained to the !riesthood by the name o+ Sergius$

The !ro+ession /as an im!ortant event in his inner li+e$

4e had !reviously e2!erienced a great consolation and

s!iritual e2altation /hen receiving communion. and no/

/hen he himsel+ o++iciated. the !er+ormance o+ the

!re!aration +illed him /ith ecstatic and dee! emotion$

ut subse6uently that +eeling became more and more

deadened. and once /hen he /as o++iciating in a de!ressed

state o+ mind he +elt that the in+luence !roduced on him

by the service /ould not endure$ and it did in +act

/eaken till only the habit remained$

(n general in the seventh year o+ his li+e in the

monastery Sergius gre/ /eary$ 4e had learnt all there

/as to learn and had attained all there /as to attain.

there /as nothing more to do and his s!iritual dro/siness

increased$ uring this time he heard o+ his mother s

death and his sister 5arvara s marriage. but both events

/ere matters o+ indi++erence to him$ 4is /hole attention

and his /hole interest /ere concentrated on his inner

li+e$

(n the +ourth year o+ his !riesthood. during /hich

the isho! had been !articularly kind to him. the

;starets; told him that he ought not to decline it i+ he

/ere o++ered an a!!ointment to higher duties$ Then

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monastic ambition. the very thing he had +ound so

re!ulsive in other monks. arose /ithin him$ 4e /as

assigned to a monastery near the metro!olis$ 4e /ished

to re+use but the ;starets; ordered him to acce!t the

a!!ointment$ 4e did so. and took leave o+ the ;starets;

and moved to the other monastery$

The e2change into the metro!olitan monastery /as an

im!ortant event in Sergius s li+e$ There he encountered

many tem!tations. and his /hole /ill&!o/er /as

concentrated on meeting them$

(n the +irst monastery. /omen had not been a

tem!tation to him. but here that tem!tation arose /ith

terrible strength and even took de+inite sha!e$ There

/as a lady kno/n +or her +rivolous behaviour /ho began to

seek his +avour$ She talked to him and asked him to

visit her$ Sergius sternly declined. but /as horri+ied

by the de+initeness o+ his desire$ 4e /as so alarmed

that he /rote about it to the ;starets;$ And in

addition. to kee! himsel+ in hand. he s!oke to a young

novice and. con6uering his sense o+ shame. con+essed his

/eakness to him. asking him to kee! /atch on him and not

let him go any/here e2ce!t to service and to +ul+il his

duties$

esides this. a great !it+all +or Sergius lay in the

+act o+ his e2treme anti!athy to his ne/ Abbot. a cunning

/orldly man /ho /as making a career +or himsel+ in the

,hurch$ Struggle /ith himsel+ as he might. he could not

master that +eeling$ 4e /as submissive to the Abbot. but

in the de!ths o+ his soul he never ceased to condemn him$

and in the second year o+ his residence at the ne/

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monastery that ill&+eeling broke out$

The 5igil service /as being !er+ormed in the large

church on the eve o+ the +east o+ the (ntercession o+ the

lessed 5irgin. and there /ere many visitors$ The Abbot

himsel+ /as conducting the service$ Father Sergius /as

standing in his usual !lace and !raying" that is. he /as

in that condition o+ struggle /hich al/ays occu!ied him

during the service. es!ecially in the large church /hen

he /as not himsel+ conducting the service$ This con+lict

/as occasioned by his irritation at the !resence o+ +ine

+olk. es!ecially ladies$ 4e tried not to see them or to

notice all that /ent on" ho/ a soldier conducted them.

!ushing the common !eo!le aside. ho/ the ladies !ointed

out the monks to one another && es!ecially himsel+ and a

monk noted +or his good looks$ 4e tried as it /ere to

kee! his mind in blinkers. to see nothing but the light

o+ the candles on the altar&screen. the icons. and those

conducting the service$ he tried to hear nothing but the

!rayers that /ere being chanted or read. to +eel nothing

but sel+&oblivion in consciousness o+ the +ul+illment o+

duty && a +eeling he al/ays e2!erienced /hen hearing or

reciting in advance the !rayers he had so o+ten heard$

So he stood. crossing and !rostrating himsel+ /hen

necessary. and struggled /ith himsel+. no/ giving /ay to

cold condemnation and no/ to a consciously evoked

obliteration o+ thought and +eeling$ Then the sacristan.

Father Nicodemus && also a great stumbling&block to

Sergius /ho involuntarily re!roached him +or +lattering

and +a/ning on the Abbot && a!!roached him and. bo/ing

lo/. re6uested his !resence behind the holy gates$

Father Sergius straightened his mantle. !ut on his

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biretta. and /ent circums!ectly through the cro/d$

>Lise. regarde a droite. c est luiB> he heard a

/oman s voice say$

> u. ouD (l n est !as tellement beau$>

4e kne/ that they /ere s!eaking o+ him$ 4e heard

them and. as al/ays at moments o+ tem!tation. he re!eated

the /ords. >Lead us not into tem!tation>. and bo/ing his

head and lo/ering his eyes /ent !ast the ambo and in by

the north door. avoiding the canons in their cassocks /ho

/ere 7ust then !assing the altar&screen$ n entering the

sanctuary he bo/ed. crossing himsel+ as usual and bending

double be+ore the icons$ Then. raising his head but

/ithout turning. he glanced out o+ the corner o+ his eye

at the Abbot. /hom he sa/ standing beside another

glittering +igure$

The Abbot /as standing by the /all in his vestments$

4aving +reed his short !lum! hands +rom beneath his

chasuble he had +olded them over his +at body and

!rotruding stomach. and +ingering the cords o+ his

vestments /as smilingly saying something to a military

man in the uni+orm o+ a general o+ the (m!erial suite.

/ith its insignia and shoulder&knots /hich Father

Sergius s e2!erienced eyes at once recogni=ed$ this

general had been the commander o+ the regiment in /hich

Sergius had served$ 4e no/ evidently occu!ied an

im!ortant !osition. and Father Sergius at once noticed

that the Abbot /as a/are o+ this and that his red +ace

and bald head beamed /ith satis+action and !leasure$

This ve2ed and disgusted Father Sergius. the more so /hen

he heard that the Abbot had only sent +or him to satis+y

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his +its o+ anger /ere due to the +act that in re+using

all clerical honours he humiliated himsel+ not +or the

sake o+ -od but +or the sake o+ his !ride$ >There no/.

am ( not a s!lendid man not to /ant anythingD> That /as

/hy he could not tolerate the Abbot s action$ >( have

renounced everything +or the glory o+ -od. and here ( am

e2hibited like a /ild beastB> >4ad you renounced vanity

+or -od s sake you /ould have borne it$ @orldly !ride is

not yet dead in you$ ( have thought about you. Sergius

my son. and !rayed also. and this is /hat -od has

suggested to me$ At the Tambov hermitage the anchorite

4ilary. a man o+ saintly li+e. has died$ 4e had lived

there eighteen years$ The Tambov Abbot is asking /hether

there is not a brother /ho /ould take his !lace$ And

here comes your letter$ -ot to Father Paissy o+ the

Tambov Monastery$ ( /ill /rite to him about you. and you

must ask +or 4ilary s cell$ Not that you can re!lace

4ilary. but you need solitude to 6uell your !ride$ May

-od bless youB>

Sergius obeyed the ;starets;. sho/ed his letter to

the Abbot. and having obtained his !ermission. gave u!

his cell. handed all his !ossessions over to the

monastery. and set out +or the Tambov hermitage$

There the Abbot. an e2cellent manager o+ merchant

origin. received Sergius sim!ly and 6uietly and !laced

him in 4ilary s cell. at +irst assigning to him a lay

brother but a+ter /ards leaving him alone. at sergius s

o/n re6uest$ The cell /as a dual cave. dug into the

hillside. and in it 4ilary had been buried$ (n the back

!art /as 4ilary s grave. /hile in the +ront /as a niche

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+or slee!ing. /ith a stra/ mattress. a small table. and

a shel+ /ith icons and books$ utside the outer door.

/hich +astened /ith a hook. /as another shel+ on /hich.

once a day. a monk !laced +ood +rom the monastery$

And so Sergius became a hermit$

(((

At ,arnival time. in the si2th year o+ Sergius s

li+e at the hermitage. a merry com!any o+ rich !eo!le.

men and /omen +rom a neighbouring to/n. made u! a troyka&

!arty. a+ter a meal o+ carnival&!ancakes and /ine$ The

com!any consisted o+ t/o la/yers. a /ealthy lando/ner. an

o++icer. and +our ladies$ ne lady /as the o++icer s

/i+e. another the /i+e o+ the lando/ner. the third /as

his sister && a young girl && and the +ourth a divorcee.

beauti+ul. rich and eccentric. /ho ama=ed and shocked the

to/n by her esca!ades$

The /eather /as e2cellent and the sno/&covered road

smooth as a +loor$ They drove some seven miles out o+

to/n. and then sto!!ed and consulted as to /hether they

should turn back or drive +arther$

> ut /here does this road lead toD> asked Makovkina.

the beauti+ul divorcee$

>To Tambov. eight miles +rom here.> re!lied one o+

the la/yers. /ho /as having a +lirtation /ith her$

>And then /hereD>

>Then on to L&&&. !ast the Monastery$>

>@here that Father Sergius livesD>

>Ces$>

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>3asatsky. the handsome hermitD>

>Ces$>

>mesdames and messieurs. let us drive on and see

3asatskyB @e can sto! at Tambov and having something to

eat$>

> ut /e shouldn t get home tonightB>

>Never mind. /e /ill stay at 3asatsky s$>

>@ell. there is a very good hostelry at the

Monastery$ ( stayed there /hen ( /as de+ending Makhin$>

>No. ( shall s!end the night at 3asatsky sB>

>(m!ossibleB 0ven your omni!otence could not

accom!lish thatB>

>(m!ossibleD @ill you betD>

>All rightB (+ you s!end the night /ith him. the

stake shall be /hatever you like$>

>A discretionB>

> ut on your side tooB>

>Ces. o+ course$ Let us drive on$>

5odka /as handed to the drivers. and the !arty got

out a bo2 o+ !ies. /ine. and s/eets +or themselves$ The

ladies /ra!!ed u! in their /hite dogskins$ the drivers

dis!uted as to /hose troyka should go ahead. and the

youngest. seating himsel+ side/ays /ith a dashing air.

s/ung his long knout and shouted to the horses$ The

troyka&bells tinkled and the sledge&runners s6ueaked over

the sno/$

The sledges s/ayed hardly at all$ The sha+t&horse.

/ith his tightly bound tail under his decorated

breechband. gallo!ed smoothly and briskly the smooth

road seemed to run ra!idly back/ards. /hile the driver

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dashingly shook the reins$ ne o+ the la/yers and the

o++icer sitting o!!osite talked nonsense to Makovkina s

neighbour. but Makovkina hersel+ sat motionless and in

thought. tightly /ra!!ed in her +ur$ >Al/ays the same

and al/ays nastyB The same red shiny +aces smelling o+

/ine and cigarsB The same talk. the same thoughts. and

al/ays about the same thingsB And they are all satis+ied

and con+ident that it should be so. and /ill go on living

like that till they die$ ut ( can t$ (t bores me$ (

/ant something that /ould u!set it all and turn it u!side

do/n$ Su!!ose it ha!!ened to us as to those !eo!le && at

Saratov /as itD && /ho ke!t on driving and +ro=e to death

$$$$ @hat /ould our !eo!le doD 4o/ /ould they behaveD

asely. +or certain$ 0ach +or himsel+$ And ( too should

act badly$ ut ( at any rate have beauty$ They all kno/

it$ And ho/ about that monkD (s it !ossible that he has

become indi++erent to itD NoB That is the one thing

they all care +or && like that cadet last autumn$ @hat

a +ool he /asB>

>(van NikolaevichB> she said aloud$

>/hat are your commandsD>

>4o/ old is heD>

>@hoD>

>3asatsky$>

> ver +orty. ( should think$>

>And does he receive all visitorsD>

>Ces. everybody. but not al/ays$>

>,over u! my +eet$ Not like that && ho/ clumsy you

areB NoB More. more && like thatB but you need not

s6uee=e themB>

So they came to the +orest /here the cell /as$

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Makovkina got out o+ the sledge. and told them to

drive on$ they tried to dissuade her. but she gre/

irritable and ordered them to go on$

@hen the sledges had gone she /ent u! the !ath in

her /hite dogskin coat$ the la/yer got out and sto!!ed

to /atch her$

(t /as Father Sergius s si2th year as a recluse. and

he /as no/ +orty&nine$ 4is li+e in solitude /as hard &&

not on account o+ the +asts and !rayers :they /ere no

hardshi! to him< but on account o+ an inner con+lict he

had not at all antici!ated$ The sources o+ that con+lict

/ere t/o" doubts. and the lust o+ the +lesh$ And these

t/o enemies al/ays a!!eared together$ (t seemed to him

that they /ere t/o +oes. but in reality they /ere one and

the same$ As soon as doubt /as gone so /as the lust+ul

desire$ ut thinking them to be t/o di++erent +iends he

+ought them se!arately$

> my -od. my godB> thought he$ >/hy does thou not

grant me +aithD There is lust. o+ course" even the

saints had to +ight that && Saint Anthony and others$

ut they had +aith. /hile ( have moments. hours. and

days. /hen it is absent$ @hy does the /hole /orld. /ith

all its delights. e2ist i+ it is sin+ul and must be

renouncedD @hy has Thou created this tem!tationD

Tem!tationD (s it not rather a tem!tation that ( /ish to

abandon all the 7oys o+ earth and !re!are something +or

mysel+ there /here !erha!s there is nothingD> And he

became horri+ied and +illed /ith disgust at himsel+$

>5ile creatureB And it is you /ho /ish to become a

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saintB> he u!braided himsel+. and he began to !ray$ ut

as soon as he started to !ray he sa/ himsel+ vividly as

he had been at the Monastery. in a ma7estic !ost in

biretta and mantle. and he shook his head$ >No. that is

not right$ (t is dece!tion$ ( may deceive others. but

not mysel+ or -od$ ( am not a ma7estic man. but a

!itiable and ridiculous oneB> And he thre/ back the

+olds o+ his cassock and smiled as he looked at his thin

legs to their underclothing$

Then he dro!!ed the +olds o+ the cassock again and

began reading the !rayers. making the sign o+ the cross

and !rostrating himsel+$ >,an it be that this couch /ill

be my bierD> he read$ And it seemed as i+ a devil

/his!ered to him" >A solitary couch is itsel+ a bier$

FalsehoodB> And in imagination he sa/ the shoulders o+

a /ido/ /ith /hom he had lived$ 4e shook himsel+. and

/ent on reading$ 4aving read the !rece!ts he took u! the

gos!els. o!ened the book. and ha!!ened on a !assage he

o+ten re!eated by heart" >Lord. ( believe$ 4el! thou my

unbelie+B> && and he !ut a/ay all the doubts that had

arisen$ As one re!laces an ob7ect o+ insecure

e6uilibrium. so he care+ully re!laced his belie+ on its

shaky !edestal and care+ully ste!!ed back +rom it so as

not to shake or u!set it$ The blinkers /ere ad7usted

again and he +elt tran6uilli=ed. and re!eating his

childhood s !rayer" >Lord. receive me. receive meB> he

+elt not merely at ease. but thrilled and 7oy+ul$ 4e

crossed himsel+ and lay do/n on the bedding on his narro/

bench. tucking the summer cassock under his head$ 4e

+ell aslee! at once. and in his light slumber he seemed

to hear the tinkling o+ sledge bells$ 4e did not kno/

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/hether he /as dreaming or a/ake. but a knock at the door

aroused him$ 4e sat u!. distrusting his senses. but the

knock /as re!eated$ Ces. it /as a knock close at hand.

at his door. and /ith it the sound o+ a /oman s voice$

>My godB ,an it be true. as ( have read in the

;Lives o+ the Saints;. that the devil takes on the +orm

o+ a /omanD Ces && it is a /oman s voice$ And a tender.

timid. !leasant voice$ PhuiB> And he s!at to e2orcise

the devil$ >No. it /as only my imagination.> he assured

himsel+. and he /ent to the corner /here his lectern

stood. +alling on his knees in the regular and habitual

manner /hich o+ itsel+ gave him consolation and

satis+action$ 4e sank do/n. his hair hanging over his

+ace. and !ressed his head. already going bald in +ront.

to the cold dam! stri! o+ drugget on the draughty +loor$

4e read the !salm old Father Pimon had told him /arded

o++ tem!tation$ 4e easily raised his light and emaciated

body on his strong sine/y legs and tried to continue

saying his !rayers. but instead o+ doing so he

involuntarily strained his hearing$ 4e /ished to hear

more$ All /as 6uiet$ From the corner o+ the roo+

regular dro!s continued to +all into the tub belo/$

utside /as a mist and +og eating into the sno/ that lay

on the ground$ (t /as still. very still$ And suddenly

there /as a rustling at the /indo/ and a voice && that

same tender. timid voice. /hich could only belong to an

attractive /oman && said"

>Let me in. +or ,hrist s sakeB>

(t seemed as though his blood had all rushed to his

heart and settled there$ 4e could hardly breathe$ >Let

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-od arise and let his enemies be scattered$$$>

>but ( am not a devilB> (t /as obvious that the

li!s that uttered this /ere smiling$ >( am not a devil.

but only a sin+ul /oman /ho has lost her /ay. not

+iguratively but literallyB> She laughed$ >( am +ro=en

and beg +or shelter$>

4e !ressed his +ace to the /indo/. but the little

icon&lam! /as re+lected by it and shone on the /hole

!ane$ 4e !ut his hands to both sides o+ his +ace and

!eered bet/een them$ Fog. mist. a tree. and && 7ust

o!!osite him && she hersel+$ Ces. there. a +e/ inches

+rom him. /as the s/eet. kindly. +rightened +ace o+ a

/oman in a ca! and a coat o+ long /hite +ur. leaning

to/ards him$ their eyes met /ith instant recognition"

not that they had ever kno/n one another. they had never

met be+ore. but by the look they e2changed they && and he

!articularly && +elt that they kne/ and understood one

another$ A+ter that glance to imagine her to be a devil

and not a sim!le. kindly. s/eet. timid /oman. /as

im!ossible$

>@ho are youD @hy have you comeD> he asked$

> o !lease o!en the doorB> she re!lied. /ith

ca!ricious authority$ >( am +ro=en$ ( tell you ( have

lost my /ay$>

> ut ( am a monk && a hermit$>

> h. do !lease o!en the door && or do you /ish me to

+ree=e under your /indo/ /hile you say your !rayersD>

> ut ho/ have you$$$>

>( shan t eat you$ +or -od s sake let me inB ( am

6uite +ro=en$>

She really did +eel a+raid. and said this in an

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almost tear+ul voice$

4e ste!!ed back +rom the /indo/ and looked at an

icon o+ the Saviour in 4is cro/n o+ thorns$ >Lord. hel!

meB Lord. hel! meB> he e2claimed. crossing himsel+ and

bo/ing lo/$ Then he /ent to the door. and o!ening it

into the tiny !orch. +elt +or the hook that +astened the

outer door and began to li+t it$ 4e heard ste!s outside$

she /as coming +rom the /indo/ to the door$ >AhB> she

suddenly e2claimed. and he understood that she had

ste!!ed into the !uddle that the dri!!ing +rom the roo+

had +ormed at the threshhold$ 4is hands trembled. and he

could not raise the hook o+ the tightly closed door$

> h. /hat are you doingD Let me inB ( am all /et$

( am +ro=enB Cou are thinking about saving your soul and

letting me +ree=e to death$$$>

4e 7erked the door to/ards him. raised the hook. and

/ithout considering /hat he /as doing. !ushed it o!en

/ith such +orce that it struck her$

> h && ;!ardon;B> he suddenly e2claimed. reverting

com!letely to his old manner /ith ladies$

She smiled on hearing that ;!ardon;$ >4e is not

6uite so terrible. a+ter all.> she thought$ >(t s all

right$ (t is you /ho must !ardon me.> she said. ste!!ing

!ast him$ >( should never have ventured. but such an

e2traordinary circumstance$$$>

>(+ you !leaseB> he uttered. and stood aside to let

her !ass him$ A strong smell o+ +ine scent. /hich he had

long not encountered. struck him$ She /ent through the

little !orch into the cell /here he lived$ 4e closed the

outer door /ithout +astening the hook. and ste!!ed in

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a+ter her$

>Lord Eesus ,hrist. Son o+ -od. have mercy on me a

sinnerB Lord. have mercy on me a sinnerB> he !rayed

unceasingly. not merely to himsel+ but involuntarily

moving his li!s$ >(+ you !leaseB> he said to her again$

She stood in the middle o+ the room. moisture dri!!ing

+rom her to the +loor as she looked him over$ 4er eyes

/ere laughing$

>Forgive me +or having disturbed your solitude$ but

you see /hat a !osition ( am in$ (t all came about +rom

our starting +rom to/n +or a sledge&drive. and my making

a bet that ( /ould /alk back by mysel+ +rom the 5orobevka

to the to/n$ ut then ( lost my /ay. and i+ ( had not

ha!!ened to come u!on your cell$$$> she began lying. but

his +ace con+used her so that she could not continue. but

became silent$ she had not e2!ected him to be at all

such as he /as$ 4e /as not as handsome as she had

imagined. but /as nevertheless beauti+ul in her eyes"

his greyish hair and beard. slightly curling. his +ine.

regular nose. and his eyes like glo/ing coal /hen he

looked at her. made a strong im!ression on her$

4e sa/ that she /as saying$

>Ces$$$so.> said he. looking at her and again

lo/ering his eyes$ >( /ill go in there. and this !lace

is at your dis!osal$>

And taking do/n the little lam!. he lit a candle.

and bo/ing lo/ to her /ent into the small cell beyond the

!artition. and she heard him begin to move something

about there$ >Probably he is barricading himsel+ in +rom

meB> she thought /ith a smile. and thro/ing o++ her /hite

dogskin cloak she tried to take o++ her ca!. /hich had

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become entangled in her hair and in the /oven kerchie+

she /as /earing under it$ She had not got at all /et

/hen standing under the /indo/. and had said so only as

a !rete2t to get him to let her in$ but she really had

ste!!ed into the !uddle at the door. and her le+t +oot

/as /et u! to the ankle and her overshoe +ull o+ /ater$

She sat do/n on his bed && a bench only covered by a bit

o+ car!et && and began to take o++ her boots$ The little

cell seemed to her charming$ The narro/ little room.

some seven +eet by nine. /as as clean as glass$ There

/as nothing in it but the bench on /hich she /as sitting.

the book&shel+ above it. and a lectern in the corner$ A

shee!skin coat and a cassock hung on nails by the door$

Above the lectern /as the little lam! and an icon o+

,hrist in 4is cro/n o+ thorns$ The room smelt strangely

o+ !ers!iration and o+ earth$ (t all !leased her && even

that smell$ 4er /et +eet. es!ecially one o+ them. /ere

uncom+ortable. and she 6uickly began to take o++ her

boots and stockings /ithout ceasing to smile. !leased not

so much at having achieved her ob7ect as because she

!erceived that she had abashed that charming. strange.

striking. and attractive man$ >4e did not res!ond. but

/hat o+ thatD> she said to hersel+$

>Father SergiusB Father SergiusB r ho/ does one

call youD>

>@hat do you /antD> re!lied a 6uiet voice$

>Please +orgive me +or disturbing your solitude. but

really ( could not hel! it$ ( should sim!ly have +allen

ill$ And ( don t kno/ that ( shan t no/$ ( am all /et

and my +eet are like ice$>

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>Pardon me.> re!lied the 6uiet voice$ >( cannot be

o+ any assistance to you$>

>( /ould not have disturbed you i+ ( could have

hel!ed it$ ( am only here till daybreak$>

4e did not re!ly and she heard him muttering

something. !robably his !rayers$

>Cou /ill not be coming in hereD> she asked.

smiling$ >For ( must undress to dry mysel+$>

4e did not re!ly. but continued to read his !rayers$

>Ces. that is a manB> thought she. getting her

dri!!ing boot o++ /ith di++iculty$ She tugged at it. but

could not get it o++$ The absurdity o+ it struck her and

she began to laugh almost inaudibly$ ut kno/ing that he

/ould hear her laughter and /ould be moved by it 7ust as

she /ished him to be. she laughed louder. and her

laughter && gay. natural. and kindly && really acted on

him 7ust in the /ay she /ished$

>Ces. ( could love a man like that && such eyes and

such a sim!le noble +ace. and !assionate. too des!ite all

the !rayers he muttersB> thought she$ >Cou can t deceive

a /oman in these things$ As soon as he !ut his +ace to

the /indo/ and sa/ me. he understood and kne/$ The

glimmer o+ it /as in his eyes and remained there$ 4e

began to love and desired me$ Ces && desiredB> said she.

getting her overshoe and her boot o++ at last and

starting to take o++ her stockings$ To remove those long

stockings +astened /ith elastic it /as necessary to raise

her skirts$ She +elt embarrassed and said"

> on t come inB>

ut there /as no re!ly +rom the other side o+ the

/all$ The steady muttering continued and also a sound o+

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moving$

>4e is !rostrating himsel+ to the ground. no doubt.>

thought she$ > ut he /on t bo/ himsel+ out o+ it$ 4e is

thinking o+ me 7ust as ( am thinking o+ him$ 4e is

thinking o+ these +eet o+ mine /ith the same +eeling that

( haveB> And she !ulled o++ her /et stockings and !ut

her +eet u! on the bench. !ressing them under her$ She

say a /hile like that /ith her arms round her knees and

looking !ensively be+ore her$ > ut it is a desert. here

in this silence$ No one /ould ever kno/$$$$>

She rose. took her stockings over to the stove. and

hung them on the dam!er$ (t /as a 6ueer dam!er. and she

turned it about. and then. ste!!ing lightly on her bare

+eet. returned to the bench and sat do/n there again /ith

her +eet u!$

There /as com!lete silence on the other side o+ the

!artition$ She looked at the tiny /atch that hung round

her neck$ (t /as t/o o clock$ > ur !arty should return

about threeB> She had not more than an hour be+ore her$

>@ell. am ( to sit like this all aloneD @hat nonsenseB

( don t /ant to$ ( /ill call him at once$>

>Father Sergius. Father SergiusB Sergey mitrichB

Prince 3asatskyB>

eyond the !artition all /as silent$

>ListenB This is cruel$ ( /ould not call you i+ it

/ere not necessary$ ( am ill$ ( don t kno/ /hat is the

matter /ith meB> she e2claimed in a tone o+ su++ering$

> hB hB> she groaned. +alling back on the bench$ And

strange to say she really +elt that her strength /as

+ailing. that she /as becoming +aint. that everything in

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her ached. and that she /as shivering /ith +ever$

>ListenB 4el! meB ( don t kno/ /hat is the matter

/ith me$ hB hB> She un+astened her dress. e2!osing

her breast. and li+ter her arms. bare to the elbo/$ > hB

hB>

All this time he stood on the other side o+ the

!artition and !rayed$ 4aving +inished all the evening

!rayers. he no/ stood motionless. his eyes looking at the

end o+ his nose. and mentally re!eated /ith all his soul"

>Lord Eesus ,hrist. Son o+ -od. have mercy u!on meB>

ut he had heard everything$ 4e had heard ho/ the

silk rustled /hen she took o++ her dress. ho/ she ste!!ed

/ith bare +eet on the +loor. and had heard ho/ she rubbed

her +eet /ith her hand$ 4e +elt his o/n /eakness. and he

might be lost at any moment$ That /as /hy he !rayed

unceasingly$ 4e +elt rather as the hero in the +airy&

tale must have +elt /hen he had to go on and on /ithout

looking round$ So Sergius heard and +elt that danger and

destruction /ere there. hovering above and around him.

and that he could only save himsel+ by not looking in

that direction +or an instant$ ut suddenly the desire

to look sei=ed him$ At the same instant she said"

>This is inhuman$ ( may die$$$$>

>Ces. ( /ill go to her. but like the Saint /ho laid

one hand on the adulteress and thrust his other into the

bra=ier$ ut there is no bra=ier here$> 4e looked

round$ The lam!B 4e !ut his +inger over the +lame and

+ro/ned. !re!aring himsel+ to su++er$ And +or a rather

long time. as it seemed to him. there /as no sensation.

but suddenly && he had not yet decided /hether it /as

!ain+ul enough && he /rithed all over. 7erked his hand

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a/ay. and /aved it in the air$ >No. ( can t stand thatB>

>For -od s sake come to meB ( am dyingB hB>

>@ell && shall ( !erishD No. no soB>

>( /ill come to you directly.> he said. and having

o!ened his door. he /ent /ithout looking at her through

the cell into the !orch /here he used to cho! /ood$

There he +elt +or the block and +or an a2e /hich leant

against the /all$

>(mmediatelyB> he said. and taking u! the a2e /ith

his right hand he laid the +ore+inger o+ his le+t hand on

the block. s/ung the a2e. and struck /ith it belo/ the

second 7oint$ The +inger +le/ o++ more lightly than a

stick o+ similar thickness. and bounding u!. turned over

on the edge o+ the block and then +ell to the +loor$

4e heard it +all be+ore he +elt any !ain. but be+ore

he had time to be sur!rised he +elt a burning !ain and

the /armth o+ +lo/ing blood$ 4e hastily /ra!!ed the

stum! in the skirt o+ his cassock. and !ressing it to his

hi! /ent back into the room. and standing in +ront o+ the

/oman. lo/ered his eyes and asked in a lo/ voice" >@hat

do you /antD>

She looked at his !ale +ace and his 6uivering le+t

cheek. and suddenly +elt ashamed$ She 7um!ed u!. sei=ed

her +ur cloak. and thro/ing it round her shoulders.

/ra!!ed hersel+ u! in it$

>( /as in !ain$$$( have caught cold$$$($$$Father

Sergius$$$($$$>

4e let his eyes. shining /ith a 6uiet light o+ 7oy.

rest u!on her. and said"

> ear sister. /hy did you /ish to ruin your immortal

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soulD Tem!tations must come into the /orld. but /oe to

him by /hom tem!tation comes$ Pray that -od may +orgive

usB>

She listened and looked at him$ Suddenly she heard

the sound o+ something dri!!ing$ She looked do/n and sa/

that blood /as +lo/ing +rom his hand and do/n his

cassock$

>@hat have you done to your handD> She remembered

the sound she had heard. and sei=ing the little lam! ran

out into the !orch$ There on the +loor she sa/ the

bloody +inger$ She returned /ith her +ace !aler than his

and /as about to s!eak to him. but he silently !assed

into the back cell and +astened the door$

>Forgive meB> >4o/ can ( atone +or my sinD>

>-o a/ay$>

>Let me tie u! your hand$>

>-o a/ay +rom here$>

She dressed hurriedly and silently. and /hen ready

sat /aiting in her +urs$ The sledge&bells /ere heard

outside$

>Father Sergius. +orgive meB>

>-o a/ay$ -od /ill +orgive$>

>Father SergiusB ( /ill change my li+e$ o not

+orsake meB>

>-o a/ay$>

>+orgive me && and give me your blessingB>

>(n the name o+ the Father and o+ the Son and o+ the

4oly -hostB> && she heard his voice +rom behind the

!artition$ >-oB>

She burst into sobs and le+t the cell$ The la/yer

came +or/ard to meet her$

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>@ell. ( see ( have lost the bet$ (t can t be

hel!ed$ @here /ill you sitD>

>(t is all the same to me$>

She took a seat in the sledge. and did not utter a

/ord all the /ay home$

A year later she entered a convent as a novice. and

lived a strict li+e under the direction o+ the hermit

Arseny. /ho /rote letters to her at long intervals$

(5

Father Sergius lived as a recluse +or another seven

years$

At +irst he acce!ted much o+ /hat !eo!le brought him

&& tea. sugar. /hite bread. milk. clothing. and +ire&

/ood$ ut as time /ent on he led a more and more austere

li+e. re+using everything su!er+luous. and +inally he

acce!ted nothing but rye&bread once a /eek$ 0verything

else that /as brought him he gave to the !oor /ho came to

him$ 4e s!ent his entire time in his cell. in !rayer or

in conversation /ith callers. /ho became more and more

numerous as time /ent on$ nly three times a year did he

go out to church. and /hen necessary he /ent out to +etch

/ater and /ood$

The e!isode /ith Makovkina had occurred a+ter +ive

hears o+ his hermit li+e$ That occurrence soon became

generally kno/n && her nocturnal visit. the change she

under/ent. and her entry into a convent$ From that time

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Father Sergius s +ame increased$ More and more visitors

came to see him. other monks settled do/n near his cell.

and a church /as erected there and also a hostelry$ 4is

+ame. as usual e2aggerating his +eats. s!read ever more

and more /idely$ Peo!le began to come to him +rom a

distance. and began bringing invalids to him /hom they

declared he cured$

4is +irst cure occurred in the eighth year o+ his

li+e as a hermit$ (t /as the healing o+ a +ourteen&year&

old boy. /hose mother brought him to Father Sergius

insisting that he should lay his hand on the child s

head$ (t had never occurred to Father Sergius that he

could cure the sick$ 4e /ould have regarded such a

thought as a great sin o+ !ride but the mother /ho

brought the boy im!lored him insistently. +alling at his

+eet and saying" >@hy do you. /ho heal others. re+use to

hel! my sonD> She besought him in christ s name$ @hen

Father Sergius assured her that only -od could heal the

sick. she re!lied that she only /anted him to lay his

hands on the boy and !ray +or him$ Father Sergius

re+used and returned to his cell$ ut ne2t day :it /as

in autumn and the nights /ere already cold< on going out

+or /ater he sa/ the same mother /ith her son. a !ale boy

o+ +ourteen. and /as met by the same !etition$

4e remembered the !arable o+ the un7ust 7udge. and

though he had !reviously +elt sure that he ought to

re+use. he no/ began to hesitate and having hesitated.

took to !rayer and !rayed until a decision +ormed itsel+

in his soul$ This decision /as. that he ought to accede

to the /oman s re6uest and that her +aith might save her

son$ As +or himsel+. he /ould in this case be but an

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insigni+icant instrument chosen by -od$

And going out to the mother he did /hat she asked &&

laid his hand on the boy s head and !rayed$

The mother le+t /ith her son. and a month later the

boy recovered. and the +ame o+ the holy healing !o/er o+

the ;starets; Sergius :as they no/ called him< s!read

throughout the /hole district$ A+ter that. not a /eek

!assed /ithout sick !eo!le coming. riding or on +oot. to

Father Sergius and having acceded to one !etition he

could not re+use others. and he laid his hands on many

and !rayed$ Many recovered. and his +ame s!read more and

more$

So seven years !assed in the Monastery and thirteen

in his hermit s cell$ 4e no/ had the a!!earance o+ an

old man" his beard /as long and grey. but his hair.

though thin. /as still black and curly$

5

For some /eeks Father Sergius had been living /ith

one !ersistent thought" /hether he /as right in

acce!ting the !osition in /hich he had not so much !laced

himsel+ as been !laced by the Archimandrite and the

Abbot$ That !osition had begun a+ter the recovery o+ the

+ourteen&year&old boy$ From that time. /ith each month.

/eek. and day that !assed. Sergius +elt his o/n inner

li+e /asting a/ay and being re!laced by e2ternal li+e$

(t /as as i+ he had been turned inside out$

Sergius sa/ that he /as a means o+ attracting

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visitors and contributions to the monastery. and that

there+ore the authorities arranged matters in such a /ay

as to make as much use o+ him as !ossible$ For instance.

they rendered it im!ossible +or him to do any manual

/ork$ 4e /as su!!lied /ith everything he could /ant. and

they only demanded o+ him that he should not re+use his

blessing to those /ho came to seek it$ For his

convenience they a!!ointed days /hen he /ould receive$

They arranged a rece!tion&room +or men. and a !lace /as

railed in so that he should not !ushed over by the cro/ds

o+ /omen visitors. and so that he could conveniently

bless those /ho came$

They told him that !eo!le needed him. and that

+ul+illing ,hrist s la/ o+ love he could not re+use their

demand to see him. and that to avoid them /ould be cruel$

4e could not but agree /ith this. but the more he gave

himsel+ u! to such a li+e the more he +elt that /hat /as

internal became e2ternal. and that the +ount o+ living

/ater /ithin him dried u!. and that /hat he did no/ /as

done more and more +or men and less and less +or -od$

@hether he admonished !eo!le. or sim!ly blessed

them. or !rayed +or the sick. or advised !eo!le about

their lives. or listened to e2!ressions o+ gratitude +rom

those he had hel!ed by !rece!ts. or alms. or healing :as

they assured him< && he could not hel! being !leased at

it. and could not be indi++erent to the results o+ his

activity and to the in+luence he e2erted$ 4e thought

himsel+ a shining light. and the more he +elt this the

more /as he conscious o+ a /eakening. a dying do/n o+ the

divine light o+ truth that shone /ithin him$

>(n ho/ +ar is /hat ( do +or -od and in ho/ +ar is

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it +or menD> That /as the 6uestion that insistently

tormented him and to /hich he /as not so much unable to

give himsel+ an ans/er as unable to +ace the ans/er$

(n the de!th o+ his soul he +elt that the devil had

substituted an activity +or men in !lace o+ his +ormer

activity +or -od$ 4e +elt this because. 7ust as it had

+ormerly been hard +or him to be torn +rom his solitude

so no/ that solitude itsel+ /as hard +or him$ he /as

o!!ressed and /earied by visitors. but at the bottom o+

his heart he /as glad o+ their !resence and glad o+ the

!raise they hea!ed u!on him$

There /as a time /hen he decided to go a/ay and

hide$ 4e even !lanned all that /as necessary +or that

!ur!ose$ 4e !re!ared +or himsel+ a !easant s shirt.

trousers. coat. and ca!$ 4e e2!lained that he /anted

these to give to those /ho asked$ And he ke!t these

clothes in his cell. !lanning ho/ he /ould !ut them on.

cut his hair short. and go a/ay$ First he /ould go some

three hundred versts by train. then he /ould leave the

train and /alk +rom village to village$ 4e asked an old

man /ho had been a soldier ho/ he tram!ed" /hat !eo!le

gave him and /hat shelter they allo/ed him$ the soldier

told him /here !eo!le /ere most charitable. and /here

they /ould take a /anderer in +or the night. and Father

Sergius intended to avail himsel+ o+ this in+ormation$

he even !ut on those clothes one night in his desire to

go. but he could not decide /as best && to remain or to

esca!e$ At +irst he /as in doubt. but a+ter/ards this

indecision !assed$ 4e submitted to custom and yielded to

the devil. and only the !easant garb reminded him o+ the

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thought and +eeling he had had$

0very day more and more !eo!le +locked to him and

less and less time /as le+t him +or !rayer and +or

rene/ing his s!iritual strength$ Sometimes in lucid

moments he thought he /as like a !lace /here there had

once been a s!ring$ >There used to be a +eeble s!ring o+

living /ater /hich +lo/ed 6uietly +rom me and through me$

That /as true li+e. the time /hen she tem!ted meB> :4e

al/ays thought /ith ecstasy o+ that night and o+ her /ho

/as no/ Mother Agnes$< She had tasted o+ that !ure

/ater. but since then there had not been time +or it to

collect be+ore thirsty !eo!le came cro/ding in and

!ushing one another aside$ and they had tram!led

everything do/n and nothing /as le+t but mud$

So he thought in rare moments o+ lucidity. but his

usual state o+ mind /as one o+ /eariness and a tender

!ity +or himsel+ because o+ that /eariness$

(t /as in s!ring. on the eve o+ the mid&Pentecostal

+east$ Father Sergius /as o++iciating at the vigil

Service in his hermitage church. /here the congregation

/as as large as the little church could hold && about

t/enty !eo!le$ They /ere all /ell&to&do !ro!rietors or

merchants$ Father Sergius admitted anyone. but a

selection /as made by the monk in attendance and by an

assistant /ho /as sent to the hermitage every day +rom

the monastery$ A cro/d o+ some eighty !eo!le && !ilgrims

and !easants. and es!ecially !easant&/omen && stood

outside /aiting +or Father Sergius to come out and bless

them$ Mean/hile he conducted the service. but at the

!oint at /hich he /ent out to the tomb o+ his

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!redecessor. he staggered and /ould have +allen had he

not been caught by a merchant standing behind him and by

the monk acting as deacon$

>@hat is the matter. Father SergiusD ear manB

LordB> e2claimed the /omen$ >4e is as /hite as a sheetB>

ut Father Sergius recovered immediately. and though

very !ale. he /aved the merchant and the deacon aside and

continued to chant the service$

Father Sera!him. the deacon. the acolytes. and so+ya

(vanovna. a lady /ho al/ays lived near the hermitage and

tended Father Sergius. begged him to bring the service to

an end$

>No. there s nothing the matter.> said Father

Sergius. slightly smiling +rom beneath his moustache and

continuing the service$ >Ces. that is the /ay the Saints

behavedB> thought he$

>A holy man && an angel o+ -odB> he heard 7ust then

the voice o+ So+ya (vanovna behind him. and also o+ the

merchant /ho had su!!orted him$ 4e did not heed their

entreaties. but /ent on /ith the service$ Again cro/ding

together they all made their /ay by the narro/ !assages

back into the little church. and there. though

abbreviating it slightly. Father Sergius com!leted

ves!ers$

(mmediately a+ter the service Father Sergius. having

!ronounced the benediction on those !resent. /ent over to

the bench under the elm tree at the entrance to the cave$

4e /ished to rest and breathe the +resh air && he +elt in

need o+ it$ ut as soon as he le+t the church the cro/d

o+ !eo!le rushed to him soliciting his blessing. his

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advice and his hel!$ There /ere !ilgrims /ho constantly

tram!ed +rom one holy !lace to another and +rom one

;starets; to another. and /ere al/ays entranced by every

shrine and every ;starets;$ Father Sergius kne/ this

common. cold. conventional. and most irreligious ty!e$

There /ere !ilgrims. +or the most !art discharged

soldiers. unaccustomed to a settled li+e. !overty&

stricken. and many o+ them drunken old men. /ho tram!ed

+rom monastery to monastery merely to be +ed$ And there

/ere rough !easants and !easant&/omen /ho had come /ith

their sel+ish re6uirements. seeking cures or to have

doubts about 6uite !ractical a++airs solved +or them"

about marrying o++ a daughter. or hiring a sho!. or

buying a bit o+ land. or ho/ to atone +or having overlaid

a child or having an illegitimate one$

All this /as an old story and not in the least

interesting to him$ 4e kne/ he /ould hear nothing ne/

+rom these +olk. that they /ould arouse no religious

emotion in him but he liked to see the cro/d to /hich

his blessing and advice /as necessary and !recious. so

/hile that cro/d o!!ressed him it also !leased him$

Father Sera!him began to drive them a/ay. saying that

Father Sergius /as tired$ ut Father Sergius.

remembering the /ords o+ the -os!el" >Forbid them>

:children< >not to come unto me.> and +eeling tenderly

to/ards himsel+ at this recollection. said they should be

allo/ed to a!!roach$

4e rose. /ent to the railing beyond /hich the cro/d

had gathered. and began blessing them and ans/ering their

6uestions. but in a voice so /eak that he /as touched

/ith !ity +or himsel+$ Cet des!ite his /ish to receive

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them all he could not do it$ things again gre/ dark

be+ore his eyes. and he staggered and gras!ed the

railings$ 4e +elt a rush o+ blood to his head and +irst

/ent !ale and then suddenly +lushed$

>( must leave the rest till tomorro/$ ( cannot do

more today.> and. !ronouncing a general benediction. he

returned to the bench$ The merchant again su!!orted him.

and leading him by the arm hel!ed him to be seated$

>FatherB> came voices +rom the cro/d$ > ear FatherB

o no +orsake us$ @ithout you /e are lostB>

The merchant. having seated Father Sergius on the

bench under the elm. took on himsel+ !olice duties and

drove the !eo!le o++ very resolutely$ (t is true that he

s!oke in a lo/ voice so that Father Sergius might not

hear him. but his /ords /ere incisive and angry$

> e o++. be o++B 4e has blessed you. and /hat more

do you /antD -et along /ith you. or ( ll /ring your

necksB Move on thereB -et along. you old /oman /ith

your dirty leg&bandsB -o. goB /here are you shoving toD

Cou ve been told that it is +inished$ Tomorro/ /ill be

as god /ills. but +or today he has +inishedB>

>FatherB nly let my eyes have a glim!se o+ his dear

+aceB> said an old /oman$

>( ll glim!se youB @here are you shoving toD>

Father Sergius noticed that the merchant seemed to

be acting roughly. and in a +eeble voice told the

attendant that the !eo!le should not be driven a/ay$ 4e

kne/ that they /ould be driven a/ay all the same. and he

much desired to be le+t alone and to rest. but he sent

the attendant /ith that message to !roduce an im!ression$

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>All right. all rightB ( am not driving them a/ay$

( am only remonstrating /ith them.> re!lied the merchant$

>Cou kno/ they /ouldn t hesitate to drive a man to death$

They have no !ity. they only consider themselves$$$$

Cou ve been told you cannot see him$ -o a/ayB

tomorro/B> And he got rid o+ them all$

4e took all these !ains because he liked order and

liked to domineer and drive the !eo!le a/ay. but chie+ly

because he /anted to have Father Sergius to himsel+$ 4e

/as a /ido/er /ith an only daughter /ho /as an invalid

and unmarried. and /hom he had brought +ourteen hundred

versts to Father Sergius to be healed$ For t/o years

!ast he had been taking her to di++erent !laces to be

cured" +irst to the university clinic in the chie+ to/n

o+ the !rovince. but that did no good then to a !easant

in the !rovince o+ Samara. /here she got a little better

then to a doctor in Mosco/ to /hom he !aid much money.

but this did no good at all$ No/ he had been told that

Father Sergius /rought cures. and had brought her to him$

So /hen all the !eo!le had been driven a/ay he a!!roached

Father Sergius. and suddenly +alling on his knees loudly

e2claimed"

>4oly FatherB less my a++licted o++s!ring that she

may be healed o+ her malady$ ( venture to !rostrate

mysel+ at your holy +eet$>

And he !laced one hand on the other. cu!&/ise$ 4e

said and did all this as i+ he /ere doing something

clearly and +irmly a!!ointed by la/ and usage && as i+

one must and should ask +or a daughter to be cured in

7ust this /ay and no other$ 4e did it /ith such

conviction that it seemed even to Father Sergius that it

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should be said and done in 7ust that /ay. but

nevertheless he bade him rise and tell him /hat the

trouble /as$ The merchant said that his daughter. a girl

o+ t/enty&t/o had +allen ill t/o years ago. a+ter her

mother s sudden death$ She had moaned :as he e2!ressed

it< and since then had not been hersel+$ And no/ he had

brought her +ourteen hundred versts and she /as /aiting

in the hostelry till Father Sergius should give orders to

bring her$ She did not go out during the day. being

a+raid o+ the light. and could only come a+ter sunset$

>(s she very /eakD> asked Father Sergius$

>No. she has no !articular /eakness$ she is 6uite

!lum!. and is only neurasthenic the doctors say$ (+

you /ill only let me bring her this evening. Father

Sergius. ( ll +ly like a s!irit to +etch her$ 4oly

FatherB ?evive a !arent s heart. restore his line. save

his a++licted daughter by your !rayersB> And the

merchant again thre/ himsel+ on his knees and bending

side/ays. /ith his head resting on his clenched +ists.

remained stock still$ Father Sergius again told him to

get u!. and thinking ho/ heavy his activities /ere and

ho/ he /ent through /ith them !atiently not/ithstanding.

he sighed heavily and a+ter a +e/ seconds o+ silence.

said"

>@ell. bring her this evening$ ( /ill !ray +or her.

but no/ ( am tired$$$> and he closed his eyes$ >( /ill

send +or you$>

The merchant /ent a/ay. ste!!ing on ti!toe. /hich

only made his boots creak the louder. and Father Sergius

remained alone$

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4is /hole li+e /as +illed by ,hurch services and by

!eo!le /ho came to see him. but today had been a

!articularly di++icult one$ (n the morning and im!ortant

o++icial had arrived and had had a long conversation /ith

him a+ter that a lady had come /ith her son$ this son

/as a sce!tical young !ro+essor /hom the mother. an

ardent believer and devoted to Father Sergius. had

brought that he might talk to him$ The conversation had

been very trying$ The young man. evidently not /ishing

to have a controversy /ith a monk. had agreed /ith him in

everything as /ith someone /ho /as mentally in+erior$

Father Sergius sa/ that the young man did not believe but

yet /as satis+ied. tran6uil. and at ease. and the memory

o+ that conversation no/ dis6uieted him$

>4ave something to eat. Father.> said the attendant$

>All right. bring me something$>

The attendant /ent to a hut that had been arranged

some ten !aces +rom the cave. and Father Sergius remained

alone$

The time /as long !ast /hen he had lived alone doing

everything +or himsel+ and eating only rye bread. or

rolls !re!ared +or the ,hurch$ 4e had been advised long

since that he had no right to neglect his health. and he

/as given /holesome. though Lenten. +ood$ 4e ate

s!aringly. though much more than he had done. and o+ten

he ate /ith much !leasure. and not as +ormerly /ith

aversion and a sense o+ guilt$ So it /as no/$ 4e had

some gruel. drank a cu! o+ tea. and ate hal+ a /hite

roll$

The attendant /ent a/ay. and Father Sergius remained

alone under the elm tree$

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(t /as a /onder+ul May evening. /hen the birches.

as!ens. elms. /ild cherries. and oaks. had 7ust burst

into +oliage$

The bush o+ /ild cherries behind the elm tree /as in

+ull bloom and had not yet begun to shed its blossoms.

and the nightingales && one 6uite near at hand and t/o or

three others in the bushes do/n by the river && burst

into +ull song a+ter some !reliminary t/itters$ From the

river came the +ar&o++ songs o+ !easants returning. no

doubt. +rom their /ork$ The sun /as setting behind the

+orest. its last rays glo/ing through the leaves$ All

that side /as brilliant green. the other side /ith the

elm tree /as dark$ The cockcha+ers +le/ clumsily about.

+alling to the ground /hen they collided /ith anything$

A+ter su!!er Father Sergius began to re!eat a silent

!rayer" > Lord Eesus ,hrist. Son o+ -od. have mercy

u!on usB> and then he read a !salm. and suddenly in the

middle o+ the !salm a s!arro/ +le/ out +rom the bush.

alighted on the ground. and ho!!ed to/ards him chir!ing

as it came. but then it took +right at something and +le/

a/ay$ 4e said a !rayer /hich re+erred to his abandonment

o+ the /orld. and hastened to +inish it in order to send

+or the merchant /ith the sick daughter$ She interested

him in that she !resented a distraction. and because both

she and her +ather considered him a saint /hose !rayers

/ere e++icacious$ ut/ardly he disavo/ed that idea. but

in the de!ths o+ his soul he considered it to be true$

4e /as o+ten ama=ed that this had ha!!ened. that he.

Ste!an 3asatsky. had come to be such an e2traordinary

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saint and even a /orker o+ miracles. but o+ the +act that

he /as such there could not be the least doubt$ 4e could

not +ail to believe in the miracles he himsel+ /itnessed.

beginning /ith the sick boy and ending /ith the old /oman

/ho had recovered her sight /hen he had !rayed +or her$

Strange as it might be. it /as so$ Accordingly the

merchant s daughter interested him as a ne/ individual

/ho had +aith in him. and also as a +resh o!!ortunity to

con+irm his healing !o/ers and enhance his +ame$ >They

bring !eo!le a thousand versts and /rite about it in the

!a!ers$ The 0m!eror kno/s o+ it. and they kno/ o+ it in

euro!e. in unbelieving 0uro!e> && thought he$ And

suddenly he +elt ashamed o+ his vanity and again began to

!ray$ >Lord. 3ing o+ 4eaven. ,om+orter. Soul o+ TruthB

,ome and enter into me and cleanse me +rom all sin and

save and bless my soul$ ,leanse me +rom the sin o+

/orldly vanity that troubles meB> he re!eated. and he

remembered ho/ o+ten he had !rayed about this and ho/

vain no/ his !rayers had been in that res!ect$ 4is

!rayers /orked miracles +or others. but in his o/n case

-od had not granted him liberation +rom this !etty

!assion$

4e remembered his !rayers at the commencement o+ his

li+e at the hermitage. /hen he !rayed +or !urity.

humility. and love. and ho/ it seemed to him then that

-od heard his !rayers$ 4e had retained his !urity and

had cho!!ed o++ his +inger$ And he li+ted the shrivelled

stum! o+ that +inger to his li!s and kissed it$ (t

seemed to him no/ that he had been humble then /hen he

had al/ays seemed loathsome to himsel+ on account o+ his

sin+ulness and /hen he remembered the tender +eelings

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/ith /hich he had then met an old man /ho /as bringing a

drunken soldier to him to ask alms and ho/ he had

received ;her;. it seemed to him that he had then

!ossessed love also$ ut no/D And he asked himsel+

/hether he loved anyone. /hether he loved So+ya (vanovna.

or Father Sera!him. /hether he had any +eeling o+ love

+or all /ho had come to him that day && +or that learned

young man /ith /hom he had had that instructive

discussion in /hich he /as concerned only to sho/ o++ his

o/n intelligence and that he had not lagged behind the

times in kno/ledge$ 4e /anted and needed their love. but

+elt none to/ards them$ 4e no/ had neither love nor

humility nor !urity$

4e /as !leased to kno/ that the merchant s daughter

/as t/enty&t/o. and he /ondered /hether she /as good&

looking$ @hen he in6uired /hether she /as /eak. he

really /anted to kno/ i+ she had +eminine charm$

>,an ( have +allen so lo/D> he thought$ >Lord. hel!

meB ?estore me. my Lord and -odB> and he clas!ed his

hands and began to !ray$

The nightingales burst into song. a cockcha+er

knocked against him and cre!t u! the back o+ his neck$

4e brushed it o++$ > ut does 4e e2istD @hat i+ ( am

knocking at a door +astened +rom outsideD The bar is on

the door +or all to see$ Nature && the nightingales and

the cockcha+ers && is that bar$ Perha!s the young man

/as right$> And he began to !ray aloud$ 4e !rayed +or

a long time till these thoughts vanished and he again

+elt calm and con+ident$ 4e rang the bell and told the

attendant to say that the merchant might bring his

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daughter to him no/$

The merchant came. leading his daughter by the arm$

4e led her into the cell and immediately le+t her$

she /as a very +air girl. !lum! and very short. /ith

a !ale. +rightened. childish +ace and a much develo!ed

+eminine +igure$ Father Sergius remained seated on the

bench at the entrance and /hen she /as !assing and

sto!!ed beside him +or his blessing he /as aghast at

himsel+ +or the /ay he looked at her +igure$ As she

!assed by him he /as acutely conscious o+ her +emininity.

though he sa/ by her +ace that she /as sensual and

+eeble&minded$ 4e rose and /ent into the cell$ She /as

sitting on a stool /aiting +or him. and /hen he entered

she rose$

>( /ant to go back to Pa!a.> she said$

> on t be a+raid.> he re!lied$ >@hat are you

su++ering +romD>

>( am in !ain all over.> she said. and suddenly her

+ace lit u! /ith a smile$

>Cou /ill be /ell.> said he$ >PrayB>

>@hat is the use o+ !rayingD ( have !rayed and it

does not good> && and she continued to smile$ >( /ant

you to !ray +or me and lay your hands on me$ ( sa/ you

in a dream$>

>4o/ did you see meD>

>( sa/ you !ut your hands on my breast like that$>

She took his hand and !ressed it to her breast$ >Eust

here$>

4e yielded his right hand to her$

>@hat is your nameD> he asked. trembling all over

and +eeling that he /as overcome and that his desire had

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already !assed beyond control$

>Marie$ @hyD>

She took his hand and kissed it. and then !ut her

arm round his /aist and !ressed him to hersel+$

>@hat are you doingD> he said$ >Marie. you are a

devilB>

> h. !erha!s$ @hat does it matterD>

And embracing him she sat do/n /ith him on the bed$

At da/n he /ent out into the !orch$

>,an this all have ha!!enedD 4er +ather /ill come

and she /ill tell him everything$ She is a devilB @hat

am ( to doD 4ere is the a2e /ith /hich ( cho!!ed o++ my

+inger$> 4e snatched u! the a2e and moved back to/ards

the cell$

The attendant came u!$

> o you /ant some /ood cho!!edD Let me have the

a2e$>

Sergius yielded u! the a2e and entered the cell$

She /as lying there aslee!$ 4e looked at her /ith

horror. and !assed on beyond the !artition. /here he took

do/n the !easant clothes and !ut them on$ Then he sei=ed

a !air o+ scissors. but o++ his long hair. and /ent out

along the !ath do/n the hill to the river. /here he had

not been +or more than three years$

A road ran beside the river and he /ent along it and

/alked till noon$ Then he /ent into a +ield o+ rye and

lay do/n there$ To/ards evening he a!!roached a village.

but /ithout entering it /ent to/ards the cli++ that

overhung the river$ There he again lay do/n to rest$

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(t /as early morning. hal+ an hour be+ore sunrise$

All /as dam! and gloomy and a cold early /ind /as blo/ing

+rom the /est$ >Ces. ( must end it all$ There is no

-od$ ut ho/ am ( to end itD Thro/ mysel+ into the

riverD ( can s/im and should not dro/n$ 4ang mysel+D

Ces. 7ust thro/ this sash over a branch$> This seemed so

+easible and so easy that he +elt horri+ied$ As usual at

moments o+ des!air he +elt the need o+ !rayer$ ut there

/as no one to !ray to$ There /as no -od$ 4e lay do/n

resting on his arm. and suddenly such a longing +or slee!

overcame him that he could no longer su!!ort his head on

his hand. but stretched out his arm. laid his head u!on

it. and +ell aslee!$ ut that slee! lasted only +or a

moment$ 4e /oke u! immediately and began not to dream

but to remember$

4e sa/ himsel+ as a child in his mother s home in

the country$ A carriage drives u!. and out o+ it ste!s

ncle Nicholas Sergeevich. /ith his long. s!ade&sha!ed.

black beard. and /ith him Pashenka. a thin little girl

/ith large mild eyes and a timid !athetic +ace$ And into

their com!any o+ boys Pashenka is brought and they have

to !lay /ith her. but it is dull$ She is silly. and it

ends by their making +un o+ her and +orcing her to sho/

ho/ she can s/im$ She lies do/n on the +loor and sho/s

them. and they all laugh and make a +ool o+ her$ She

sees this and blushes red in !atches and becomes more

!itiable than be+ore. so !itiable that he +eels ashamed

and can never +orget that crooked. kindly. submissive

smile$ And Sergius remembered having seen her since

then$ Long a+ter. 7ust be+ore he became a monk. she had

married a lando/ner /ho s6uandered all her +ortune and

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/as in the habit o+ beating her$ She had had t/o

children. a son and a daughter. but the son had died

/hile still young$ And Sergius remembered having seen

her very /retched$ Then again he had seen her in the

monastery /hen she /as a /ido/$ She had been still the

same. not e2actly stu!id. but insi!id. insigni+icant. and

!itiable$ She had come /ith her daughter and her

daughter s +iance$ They /ere already !oor at that time

and later on he had heard that she /as living in a small

!rovincial to/n and /as very !oor$

>@hy am ( thinking about herD> he asked himsel+. but

he could not cease doing so$ >@here is sheD 4o/ is she

getting onD (s she still as unha!!y as she /as then /hen

she had to sho/ us ho/ to s/im on the +loorD ut /hy

should ( think about herD @hat am ( doingD ( must !ut

an end to mysel+$>

And again he +elt a+raid. and again. to esca!e +rom

that thought. he /ent on thinking about Pashenka$

So he lay +or a long time. thinking no/ o+ his

unavoidable end and no/ o+ Pashenka$ She !resented

hersel+ to him as a means o+ salvation$ At last he +ell

aslee!. and in his slee! he sa/ an angel /ho came to him

and said" >-o to Pashenka and learn +rom her /hat you

have to do. /hat your sin is. and /herein lies your

salvation$>

4e a/oke. and having decided that this /as a vision

sent by -od. he +elt glad. and resolved to do /hat had

been told him in the vision$ 4e kne/ the to/n /here she

lived$ (t /as some three hundred versts :t/o hundred

miles< a/ay. and he set out to /alk there$

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5(

Pashenka had already long ceased to be Pashenka and

had become old. /ithered. /rinkled Praskovya Mikhaylovna.

mother&in&la/ o+ that +ailure. the drunken o++icial

Mavrikyev$ she /as living in the country to/n /here he

had had his last a!!ointment. and there she /as

su!!orting the +amily" her daughter. her ailing

neurasthenic son&in&la/. and her +ive grandchildren$ she

did this by giving music lessons to tradesmen s

daughters. giving +our and sometimes +ive lessons a day

o+ an hour each. and earning in this /as some si2ty

rubles :GH< a month$ So they lived +or the !resent. in

e2!ectation o+ another a!!ointment$ She had sent letters

to all her relations and ac6uaintances asking them to

obtain a !ost +or her son&in&la/. and among the rest she

had /ritten to Sergius. but that letter had not reached

him$

(t /as a Saturday. and Praskovya Mikhaylovna /as

hersel+ mi2ing dough +or currant bread such as the ser+

cook on her +ather s estate used to make so /ell$ She

/ished to give her grandchildren a treat on the Sunday$

Masha. her daughter. /as nursing her youngest child.

the eldest boy and girl /ere at school. and her son&in&

la/ /as aslee!. not having sle!t during the night$

Praskovya Mikhaylovna had remained a/ake too +or a great

!art o+ the night. trying to so+ten her daughter s anger

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against her husband$

She sa/ that it /as im!ossible +or her son&in&la/.

a /eak creature. to be other than he /as. and reali=ed

that his /i+e s re!roaches could do no good && so she

used all her e++orts to so+ten those re!roaches and to

avoid recrimination and anger$ nkindly relations

bet/een !eo!le caused her actual !hysical su++ering$ (t

/as so clear to her that bitter +eelings do not make

anything better. but only make everything /orse$ She did

not in +act think about this" she sim!ly su++ered at the

sight o+ anger as she /ould +rom a bad smell. a harsh

noise. or +rom blo/s on her body$

She had && /ith a +eeling o+ sel+&satis+action &&

7ust taught Lukerya ho/ to mi2 the dough. /hen her si2&

year&old grandson Misha. /earing an a!ron and /ith darned

stockings on his crooked little legs. ran into the

kitchen /ith a +rightened +ace$

>-randma. a dread+ul old man /ants to see you$>

Lukerya looked out at the door$

>There is a !ilgrim o+ some kind. a man$$$>

Praskovya Mikhaylovna rubbed her thin elbo/s against

one another. /i!ed her hands on her a!ron and /ent

u!stairs to get a +ive&ko!ek !iece Iabout a !ennyJ out o+

her !urse +or him. but remembering that she had nothing

less than a ten&ko!ek !iece she decided to give him some

bread instead$ She returned to the cu!board. but

suddenly blushed at the thought o+ having grudged the

ten&ko!ek !iece. and telling Lukerya to cut a slice o+

bread. /ent u!stairs again to +etch it$ >(t serves you

right.> she said to hersel+$ >Cou must no/ give t/ice

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over$>

She gave both the bread and the money to the

!ilgrim. and /hen doing so && +ar +rom being !roud o+ her

generosity && she e2cused hersel+ +or giving so little$

The man had such an im!osing a!!earance$

Though he had tram!ed t/o hundred versts as a

beggar. though he /as tattered and had gro/n thin and

/eather&beaten. though he had cro!!ed his long hair and

/as /earing a !easant s ca! and boots. and though he

bo/ed very humbly. Sergius still had the im!ressive

a!!earance that made him so attractive$ ut Praskovya

Mikhaylovna did not recogni=e him$ She could hardly do

so. not having seen him +or almost t/enty years$

> on t think ill o+ me. Father$ Perha!s you /ant

something to eatD>

4e took the bread and the money. and Praskovya

Mikhaylovna /as sur!rised that he did not go. but stood

looking at her$

>Pashenka. ( have come to youB Take me in$$$>

4is beauti+ul black eyes. shining /ith the tears

that started in them. /ere +i2ed on her /ith im!loring

insistence$ and under his greyish moustache his li!s

6uivered !iteously$

Praskovya Mikhaylovna !ressed her hands to her

/ithered breast. o!ened her mouth. and stood !etri+ied.

staring at the !ilgrim /ith dilated eyes$

>(t can t beB Ste!aB SergeyB Father SergiusB>

>Ces it is (.> said Sergius in a lo/ voice$ > nly

not Sergius. or Father Sergius. but a great sinner.

Ste!an 3asatsky && a great and lost sinner$ Take me in

and hel! meB>

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>(t s im!ossibleB 4o/ have you so humbled yoursel+D

ut come in$>

She reached out her hand. but he did not take it and

only +ollo/ed her in$

ut /here /as she to take himD The lodging /as a

small one$ Formerly she had had a tiny room. almost a

closet. +or hersel+. but later she had given it u! to her

daughter. and Masha /as no/ sitting there rocking the

baby$

>Sit here +or the !resent.> she said to Sergius.

!ointing to a bench in the kitchen$

4e sat do/n at once. and /ith an evidently

accustomed movement sli!!ed the stra!s o+ his /allet

+irst o++ one shoulder and then o++ the other$

>My -od. my -odB 4o/ you have humbled yoursel+.

FatherB such great +ame. and no/ like this$$$>

Sergius did not re!ly. but only smiled meekly.

!lacing his /allet under the bench on /hich he sat$

>Masha. do you kno/ /ho this isD> && and in a

/his!er Praskovya Mikhaylovna told her daughter /ho he

/as. and together they then carried the bed and the

cradle out o+ the tiny room and cleared it +or Sergius$

Praskovya Mikhaylovna led him into it$

>4ere you can rest$ on t take o++ence $$$ but (

must go out$>

>@here toD>

>( have to go to a lesson$ ( am ashamed to tell

you. but ( teach musicB>

>MusicD ut that is good$ nly 7ust one thing.

Praskovya Mikhaylovna. ( have come to you /ith a de+inite

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ob7ect$ @hen can ( have a talk /ith youD>

>( shall be very glad$ @ill this evening doD>

>Ces$ ut one thing more$ on t s!eak about me. or

say /ho ( am$ ( have revealed mysel+ only to you$ No

one kno/s /here ( have gone to$ (t must be so$>

> h. but ( have told my daughter$>

>@ell. ask her not to mention it$>

And Sergius took o++ his boots. lay do/n. and at

once +ell aslee! a+ter a slee!less night and a /alk o+

nearly thirty miles$

@hen Praskovya Mikhaylovna returned. Sergius /as

sitting in the little room /aiting +or her$ 4e did not

come out +or dinner. but had some sou! and gruel /hich

Lukerya brought him$

>4o/ is it that you have come back earlier than you

saidD> asked Sergius$ >,an ( s!eak to you no/D>

>4o/ is it that ( have the ha!!iness to receive such

a guestD ( have missed one o+ my lessons$ That can

/ait$$$ ( had al/ays been !lanning to go to see you$ (

/rote to you. and no/ this good +ortune has come$>

>Pashenka. !lease listen to /hat ( am going to tell

you as to a con+ession made to -od at my last hour$

Pashenka. ( am not a holy man. ( am not even as good as

a sim!le ordinary man ( am a loathsome. vile. and !roud

sinner /ho has gone astray. and /ho. i+ not /orse than

everyone else. is at least /orse than most very bad

!eo!le$>

Pashenka looked at him at +irst /ith staring eyes$

ut she believed /hat he said. and /hen she had 6uite

gras!ed it she touched his hand. smiled !ityingly. and

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said"

>Perha!s you e2aggerate. StivaD>

>No. Pashenka$ ( am an adulterer. a murderer. a

blas!hemer. and a deceiver$>

>My -odB 4o/ is thatD> e2claimed Praskovya

Mikhaylovna$

> ut ( must go on living$ And (. /ho thought ( kne/

everything. /ho taught others ho/ to live && ( kno/

nothing and ask you to teach me$>

>@hat are you saying. StivaD Cou are laughing at

me$ @hy do you al/ays make +un o+ meD>

>@ell. i+ you think ( am 7esting you must have it as

you !lease$ but tell me all the same ho/ you live. and

ho/ you have lived your li+e$>

>(D ( have lived a very nasty. horrible li+e. and

no/ -od is !unishing me as ( deserve$ ( live so

/retchedly. so /retchedly$$$>

>4o/ /as it /ith your marriageD 4o/ did you live

/ith your husbandD>

>(t /as all bad$ ( married because ( +ell in love

in the nastiest /ay$ Pa!a did not a!!rove$ ut ( /ould

not listen to anything and 7ust got married$ Then

instead o+ hel!ing my husband ( tormented him by my

7ealousy. /hich ( could not restrain$>

>( heard that he drank$$$>

>Ces. but ( did not give him any !eace$ ( al/ays

re!roached him. though you kno/ it is a diseaseB 4e

could not re+rain +rom it$ ( no/ remember ho/ ( tried to

!revent his having it. and the +right+ul scenes /e hadB>

And she looked at 3asatsky /ith beauti+ul eyes.

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/e had no means$$$$( al/ays ho!e it /ill !ass o+ itsel+$

4e has no !articular !ain. but$$$>

>LukeryaB> cried and angry and +eeble voice$ >She

is al/ays sent a/ay /hen ( /ant her$ Mamma$$$>

>( m comingB> Praskovya Mikhaylovna again

interru!ted hersel+$ >4e has not had his dinner yet$ 4e

can t eat /ith us$>

She /ent out and arranged something. and came back

/i!ing her thin dark hands$

>So that is ho/ ( live$ ( al/ays com!lain and am

al/ays dissatis+ied. but thank -od the grandchildren are

all nice and healthy. and /e can still live$ ut /hy

talk about meD>

> ut /hat do you live onD>

>@ell. ( earn a little$ 4o/ ( used to dislike

music. but ho/ use+ul it is to me no/B> 4er small hand

lay on the chest o+ dra/ers beside /hich she /as sitting.

and she drummed an e2ercise /ith her thin +ingers$

>4o/ much do you get +or a lessonD>

>Sometimes a ruble. sometimes +i+ty ko!eks. or

sometimes thirty$ They are all so kind to me$>

>And do your !u!ils get on /ellD> asked 3asatsky

/ith a slight smile$

Praskovya Mikhaylovna did not at +irst believe that

he /as asking seriously. and looked in6uiringly into his

eyes$

>Some o+ them do$ ne o+ them is a s!lendid girl &&

the butcher s daughter && such a good kind girlB (+ (

/ere a clever /oman ( ought. o+ course. /ith the

conne2ions Pa!a had. to be able to get an a!!ointment +or

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my son&in&la/$ ut as it is ( have not been able to do

anything. and have brought them all to this && as you

see$>

>Ces. yes.> 3asatsky. lo/ering his head$ >And ho/

is it. Pashenka && do you take !art in ,hurch li+eD>

> h. don t s!eak o+ it$ ( am so bad that /ay. and

have neglected it soB ( kee! the +asts /ith the children

and sometimes go to church. and then again sometimes (

don t go +or months$ ( only send the children$>

> ut /hy don t you go yoursel+D>

>To tell the truth> :she blushed< >( am ashamed. +or

my daughter s sake and the children s. to go there in

tattered clothes. and ( haven t anything else$ esides.

( am 7ust la=y$>

>And do you !ray at homeD>

>( do$ ut /hat sort o+ !rayer is itD nly

mechanical$ ( kno/ it should not be like that. but (

lack real religious +eeling$ The only thing is that (

kno/ ho/ bad ( am$$$$>

>Ces. yes. that s rightB> said 3asatsky. as i+

a!!rovingly$

>( m comingB ( m comingB> she re!lied to a call

+rom her son&in&la/. and tidying her scanty !lait she

le+t the room$

ut this time it /as long be+ore she returned$ @hen

she came back. 3asatsky /as sitting in the same !osition.

his elbo/s resting on his knees and his head bo/ed$ ut

his /allet /as stra!!ed on his back$

@hen she came in. carrying a small tin lam! /ithout

a shade. he raised his +ine /eary eyes and sighed very

dee!ly$

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overgro/n by desire +or human !raise$ Ces. there is no

-od +or the man /ho lives. as ( did. +or human !raise$

( /ill no/ seek 4imB>

And he /alked +rom village to village as he had done

on his /ay to Pashenka. meeting and !arting +rom other

!ilgrims. men and /omen. and asking +or bread and a

night s rest in ,hrist s name$ ccasionally some angry

house/i+e scolded him. or a drunken !easant reviled him.

but +or the most !art he /as given +ood and drink and

even something to take /ith him$ 4is noble bearing

dis!osed some !eo!le in his +avour. /hile others on the

contrary seemed !leased at the sight o+ a gentleman /ho

had come to beggary$

ut his gentleness !revailed /ith everyone$

+ten. +inding a co!y o+ the -os!els in a hut he

/ould read it aloud. and /hen they heard him the !eo!le

/ere al/ays touched and sur!rised. as at something ne/

yet +amiliar$

@hen he succeeded in hel!ing !eo!le. either by

advice. or by his kno/ledge o+ reading and /riting. or by

settling some 6uarrel. he did not /ait to see their

gratitude but /ent a/ay directly a+ter/ards$ And little

by little -od began to reveal 4imsel+ /ithin him$

nce he /as /alking along /ith t/o old /omen and a

soldier$ They /ere sto!!ed by a !arty consisting o+ a

lady and gentleman in a gig and another lady and

gentleman on horseback$ The husband /as on horseback

/ith his daughter. /hile in the gig his /i+e /as driving

/ith a Frenchman. evidently a traveller$

The !arty sto!!ed to let the Frenchman see the

!ilgrims /ho. in accord /ith a !o!ular ?ussian

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su!erstition. tram!ed about +rom !lace to !lace instead

o+ /orking$

They s!oke French. thinking that the others /ould

not understand them$

> emande=&leur.> said the Frenchman. >s ils sont

bien sur de ce 6ue leur !elerinage est agreable a ieu$>

The 6uestion /as asked. and one old /oman re!lied"

>As -od takes it$ ur +eet have reached the holy

!laces. but our hearts may not have done so$>

They asked the soldier$ 4e said that he /as alone

in the /orld and had no/here else to go$

They asked 3asatsky /ho he /as$

>A servant o+ -od$>

>Ku est&ce 6u il ditD (n ne re!ond !as$>

>(l dit 6u il est un serviteur de ieu$ ,ela doit

etre un +ils de !retre$ (l a de la race$ Ave=&vous de

la !etite monnaieD>

The Frenchman +ound some small change and gave

t/enty ko!eks to each o+ the !ilgrims$

>Mais dites&leur 6ue ce n est !as !our les cierges

6ue 7e leur donne. mais !our 6u ils se regalent de the$

,hay. chay !our vous. mon vieu2B> he said /ith a smile$

And he !atter 3asatsky on the shoulder /ith his gloved

hand$

>May ,hrist bless you.> re!lied 3asatsky /ithout

re!lacing his ca! and bo/ing his bald head$

4e re7oiced !articularly at this meeting. because he

had disregarded the o!inion o+ men and had done the

sim!lest. easiest thing && humbly acce!ted t/enty ko!eks

and given them to his comrade. a blind beggar$ The less

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im!ortance he attached to the o!inion o+ men the more did

he +eel the !resence o+ -od /ithin him$

For eight months 3asatsky tram!ed on in this manner.

and in the ninth month he /as arrested +or not having a

!ass!ort$ This ha!!ened at a night&re+uge in a

!rovincial to/n /here he had !assed the night /ith some

!ilgrims$ 4e /as taken to the !olice&station. and /hen

asked /ho he /as and /here /as his !ass!ort. he re lied

that he had no !ass!ort and that he /as a servant o+ -od$

4e /as classed as a tram!. sentenced. and sent to live in

Siberia$

(n Siberia he has settled do/n as the hired man o+

a /ell&to&do !easant. in /hich ca!acity he /orks in the

kitchen&garden. teaches children. and attends to the

sick$