“I saw theangel in

thestone ~

andcarved toset it

free.”Michelang

elo

WELCOME

“AWAKENING THE GIFTS WITHIN”

CREATING A CULTURE OF CARING

HOUSEKEEPING

Bathrooms

Refreshments

Lunch

Cell Phones

From the Family Virtues Guide

“Idealists dare to have big dreamsand then act as if they are possible...Idealism does not mean that you arean idle dreamer. Idle dreamers just

WISH that things were better.Idealists do something to

MAKE things better.“

WHO ARE THE PRESENTERS?

Terry Rahn &

Valerie Hess

Master Facilitators of The Virtues Project

What is The Virtues Project?

A global grassroots initiative that is transforming the cultures

in homes, schools, organizations and communities, through awakening virtues, the gifts of character.

4 Key Principles

The parent is the primary educator of the child.

Children are born in potential.

Their natural qualities can develop into positive or negative traits depending on how they are educated in the early years.

Character develops as children learn to make responsible, moral choices.

Self-esteem is a natural outcome of living by virtues.

What are virtues?

What’s good in us

The gifts of our character

The qualities of our spirit

Our inner strengths

Virtues: The Gifts of Character

AssertivenessCaringCleanlinessCommitmentCompassionConfidenceConsiderationCooperationCourageCourtesyCreativityDetachmentDetermination

ReliabilityRespectResponsibilitySelf-disciplineServiceTactThankfulnessToleranceTrustTrustworthinessTruthfulnessUnderstandingUnity

DiligenceEnthusiasmExcellenceFlexibilityForgivenessFriendlinessGenerosityGentlenessHelpfulnessHonestyHonorHumilityIdealism

IntegrityJoyfulnessJusticeKindnessLoveLoyaltyModerationModestyOrderlinessPatiencePeacefulnessPerseverancePurposefulness

Every Child Is Born In Potential

Just as a seed is aspecific tree inpotential,

a child is a particular,fully independent human being, in potential.

Virtues

Is it ever too late?

NO!!

It is never to late to begin applying these strategies and achieving amazing results!

Nor is it every too early…

Is this an add on curriculum?

NO! This is not one more thing to add to your day. You infuse the strategies into what you are already doing.

Will my kids think this is dorky?

Maybe

Humor is one way that adults and kids become comfortable with the language.

Hang in there!

What are the goals for this workshop?

To awaken your virtues

To teach you to see these gifts in others

To have you experience the 5 Strategies

To inspire you to apply these strategies in your professional and personal lives

What are our expectations?

Follow the directions for each exercise

Finish activities within allotted time frame

Follow the boundaries that we establish

The A.R.T. Of BoundariesAssertiveness

Respect

Trust

Do what is right for you

Be deeply present withoutadvising

interrupting rescuing

criticizing teasing

Be worthy of trust. What we say here stays here.

INTERACTIVE INTRODUCTION

1. Pick one partner.2. Choose who will be partner 1.3. Partner 1 ask partner 2 all the questions, listening for

their virtues.4. Partner 1 acknowledge partner

2 for virtues you saw and heard. VIRTUE + EXAMPLE = VIRTUES

ACKNOWLEDGMENT

Did you remember to write the virtues you saw on each other’s gem tags?

What did youappreciate about

this activity?

What do you hope

to gain from this workshop?

THE HISTORY

• 1991 • Three people• Response to school shooting and

youth violence in the US• Began as a parenting program• Virtues the common thread• Soon discovered universal

application

Dr. Dan PopovLinda Kavelin-Popov

John Kavelin

THE FIVE STRATEGIES

• Speak the Language

• Recognize Teachable Moments

• Set Clear Boundaries

• Honor the Spirit

• Offer CompanioningTM

CONGRATULATIONS!!

You have alreadypracticed all five

strategies!!

• Speak the Language

• Recognize Teachable Moments

• Set Clear Boundaries

• Honor the Spirit

• Offer CompanioningTM

SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF

VIRTUES

Name a Virtue

Encourage Mastery

Encourage Meaning

A Rainbow of Respect

Create Visual Symbols

When to Speak

theLanguage of the Virtues

Speaking The Language

How to Give a Virtues Acknowledgement

How to Give a Virtues Guidance

How to Give a Virtues Correction

I see yourI honor you for yourI acknowledge yourThat showed a lot ofIt wasYou were being Thank you for

We need to be

You need to be

I need someone to be .helpful

Please beWhat would help you to beWhat would be aBe

kindnesskindnesskindnesskindnesskind of youkindbeing kind

in helping our new student, John.In the way you helped John.in the way you helped John.When you helped our new student.to help our new student.when you helped John today.when you picked up my papers.

to our new student.

while you wait for recess.

I dropped my papers.

kind

patient

friendlypeacefulkindcooperative

to John, no teasing.with each other.way to say that.

now.

ACTIVITIES

• Speaking The Language of Virtues (handout)

• Acknowledgement Card

ACT With TactTM

Make a virtues “positivity sandwich”

RECOGNIZETEACHABLEMOMENTS

TEACHABLE MOMENTS ARE…

• The opportunities to shine light on virtues being practiced (acknowledge)

• The opportunities to bring attention to virtues needed in a given situation (guide)

• The opportunities to call one another back to our virtues when we fail to practice (correct)

In Teachable Moments

Stop Shaming

Excellenc

e

Start Naming Virtues

What Destroys Conscience?• Shaming

• Name-calling• Beating or hitting• Over-protecting• Over-punishing• Ignoring effort• Lack of clear boundaries

What Builds Conscience?

• Naming virtues

• Clear boundaries• The opportunity for

reparation• Acknowledging effort

Habits that Break Conscience

Habits that Make Conscience

Shaming (Communicating worthlessness)DemeaningHumilatingSarcasm and cruel teasingName-calling or negative labelingBeating or hittingOverprotecting or excuse-makingUsing excessive punishmentIgnoring efforts to improve

Using Time Out constructively (e.g. Replace “Naughty Chair” with “Courtesy Chair”Naming virtues when you see them practicedCalling students to a virtue when it needs to be practicedListening to offenders’ points of viewStopping negative behavior and refocusing on the VirtuesVision statementGiving consequences when they are called forProviding the opportunity to make amendsNoticing and acknowledging efforts to improve

DARKEST MOMENT/SHINING HOUR

•Describe one of your darkest moments at work. What virtues were needed?

•Describe one of your shining hours at work. What virtues were involved?

•Give your partner a virtues acknowledgement.

ACTIVITY

RENAME AND REFRAME

ht side)

The Virtues PickPick a partner. Decide who will share first.

Share something about what’s up in your life at this time (good or bad).

Read your virtue card aloud and share how it is speaking to you.

Partner, companion in SILENCE with no cross talk.When first person finishes sharing, partner give VIRTUES ACKNOWLEGEMENT and write the virtues on their gem tag.

SET CLEARBOUNDARIES

Boundaries Keep Us Safe

Clear Boundaries are needed to stay on course.

•Clear boundaries are needed when we have a problem.

Clear Boundaries are needed to create a safe and peaceful learning environment.

Our boundaries are what we need to examine first, when we have a problem.

Do our boundaries address the problem? If the answer is “no”

SET A CLEAR BOUNDARY

•What virtues are needed?

•How do they need to be practiced? Be specific.

Boundaries are found in …

Vision statementsMission statements

Staff policiesDiscipline policies

Progress ReportsGroup rules

Fieldtrip rules

What Is Your Leadership Style?

One way to view authority and leadership is on a continuum of effectiveness from theleast effectiveness for learning and character development to the most effective.

Permissive

Slider

Dominant

Democratic

EducativeUnfocused

Boundaries are shiftingor non-existent

Climate: Chaos & confusion

Focus shifts from fun to control and backBoundaries are loose

and shiftingClimate: A mix of pleasantness

and chaos

Focused on equalityBoundaries are negotiable

Climate: A mix of unity& argument

Focused on controlBoundaries are punitive

and harshClimate: Control & rebellion

Focused on virtuesBoundaries are educative

& consistentClimate: Peaceful & enjoyable

IN OUR CLASSWE PRACT ICEFRIENDLINESS!

Create a Virtues-based Vision

At Emerson School,we dare to care!

We don’t put each otherdown. We lift each other up.

We treat ourselves, eachother and our school

with respect at all times.

Create a Virtues Based Vision Statement

At Emerson School weare to

and creating a

atmosphere in which tostrive for

CommittedTolerance Unity

Peaceful

Excellence

BoundariesCourtesy

Respect

Trust

Assertiveness

Follow directions and treat each other as you would want to be treated.

Listen to each other, fully present, without interrupting, rescuing, advising, comparing or teasing.

Hold all personal information shared among us as private during and after this workshop.

Participate in a way which is right for you. Share what you are comfortable sharing.

The A.R.T. Of BoundariesAssertiveness

Respect

Trust

Do what is right for you

Be deeply present withoutadvising

interrupting rescuing

criticizing teasing

Be worthy of trust. What we say here stays here.

Guidelines for Establishing Clear

Boundaries1. Be Moderate2. Be Specific3. Be Positive - Virtues Based4. Have Specific, Relevant Consequences5. Make Consequences Educative6. Be Consistent7. Communicate Rules Clearly8. Be Sure Consequences are Understood9. Make Bottom Line Rules Non-Negotiable10. Make Expectations Clear

BOUNDARY QUESTIONS ACTIVITY

• In groups of three, take turns asking, one person at a time, all of the questions

•When each person has finished answering the questions, both listeners acknowledge virtues you see in the person who shared

WRITING A BOUNDARY• Write a personal boundary for work and for home

• Remember, first identify the virtue that

is needed

• Next, write down a specific example of how to practice it

And when the boundaries are violated…

PRACTICERESTORATIVE

JUSTICE

In Retributive Justice You are a Detective

Asking …

•What was the crime?•Who did it?•How should they be punished?

In Restorative Justice You are a Mentor

Asking All Involved…

•What happened?•Who was hurt?•What virtues were needed?•What amends can be made?

Restorative JusticeNaming virtues, not ShamingMentorship, not Censorship

Reflection, not rejectionRestitution, not retribution

HONOR THE SPIRIT

WHAT HONORS YOUR SPIRITWhat brings you joy?

What inspires you?

What renews your spirit?

What gives you energy?

What Re-

creates You?

Honor the Spirit

Mastery

Mystery

Meaning

14th Century Samurai

“I have no magic secrets.I make character my magic secret.

I have no miracles.I make right action my miracles.“

Explore MysteryHonor Meaning

J ournalingSpirit WalksVirtues Picks

Sharing Circles

Simple Steps for Spiritual HealthCreate a Routine of ReverenceTake time every day for reflection.

Enjoy YourselfSpend non-compulsory time alone

and with people you enjoy.

Make Time for FriendshipFor listening and companioning, for being together.

Lead your life with IntegrityTell the truth. Do it now.

Expose yourself to BeautyBe in nature.

Spend time with the Arts.

Personal Virtues Shield

YourTotem

CoreVirtue

CoreVirtue

WhatBrings

You J oy

ChallengeVirtue

ACTIVITY

WHAT BRINGS YOU JOY?

OFFERCOMPANIONING

This is the strategy that you use when someone else has a problem.

Getting to theHeart of the Matter

Offer Companioning

Don’t Get Furious.

Get Curious!

Is Not Is

What It Is and What It Is Not

A Fix Walk AlongA Rescue RespectCuring CaringAdvice PresenceSympathy Compassion & DetachmentTelling ListeningVictim-based Virtues-based

THE PROCESS

1.Offer receptive silence

2.Ask cup-emptying questions

3.Focus on perceptual cues

4.Ask Virtues reflection questions

5.Ask closure & integration questions

6.Offer Virtues acknowledgments

The Companioning

ProcessOpen the

Door

OfferReceptive

Silence

Ask CupEmptyingQuestions

Focus onSensory Cues

Give a VirtuesAcknowledgment

Ask Closure& Integration

Questions

Ask VirtuesReflectionQuestions

Follow Lead

“What’shappening?”

“What’s thehardestthing?”

“What arethose

tears?”

“What wouldgive you thecourage...?”

“What washelpful?”

“What isclearer?”

“I honor youfor your

loyalty toyour friend.”

ACTIVITY

SPIRIT WALK

Journaling Questions

Who/What are you? What do you represent? What is your message for me? Why are you here? How can I carry out...? What actions can I take? How can I help (or serve) you? What is your gift to me?

forImages and Symbols in Dreams and Meditations

Applications

•Organizational Assessment•Leadership Development•Creating a Vision Statement•Creating a Mission Statement•Cultural Change

Applications•Performance Appraisal

Act with TACT

•Strategic Planning•Staff Development

The Five Strategies

•Personal Virtues Profile

Strategic Planning With the Five Virtues

Strategies•Naming VirtuesWhat are our core virtues, our strengths? What VIRTUES do we need to cultivate to move forward?

•What is the Teachable MomentFor our organization?

•How clear are our Boundaries?What boundaries do we need to establish?

•How shall we honor the Spiritual Dimension?

What rituals, rites of passage, ceremonies are needed?

•What are our true issues?What needs to be heard? How well do we companion one another?

VIRTUES VILLAGE

Inspiring virtues in the home,

school, workplace and community!

For more information on products and services :

www.virtuesvillagellc.com