Untitled10 Tips to Improve Every Relationship in Your

8/6/2019 Untitled10 Tips to Improve Every Relationship in Your

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10 Tips to Improve Every Relationship in Your Life

Any type of relationship, whether it is between family members, people we work with, friends, or customers we serve, takes a lot of work to maintain and build upon. And much of the cement that improves our relationships is developing trust,compassion, and acceptance of the other. As well, differences must be taken into account no two people are alike or have the same interests, and while you will n

aturally seek commonalities to share, accommodating both differences and compatibilities is essential for long-lasting connection.Steps1. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Anna-Lynge.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Anna-Lynge.jpgKnow thyself. Long stated by many people, this simple adage is essential for good relationship building. If you don't know your own needs, wants, preferences, and limits, you risk using relationships as a source of your own validation, which can easily lead to co-dependency, clingy behavior, aggressive possessiveness,manipulation, or other unhealthy reasons for wanting to be with others. Knowingyourself enables you to be a creative, uplifting force rather than a destructive, Debbie Downer one, and you will find yourself able to revel in other's success

es, achievements, and strengths rather than resenting them. We are always attracted to people who make us feel good about ourselves and ultimately, this is thenumber one skill in improving our relationships with others.2. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Reachingout2.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Reachingout2.jpgKnow the other person. It isn't easy learning all you can about a wide range ofpeople but it makes so much of a difference that it is definitely worth it; evenpeople who cross our paths once in life can touch us deeply just by being interested in us as a person. For example, think of the salesperson who engages you in a conversation about your life rather than acting like they couldn't care lesswhether you were there or not and only going on about the product. A successfulsale is often brought about simply because the salesperson acknowledges that they're in a relationship with the customer as a human being, not as a consumer. T

ake time to build rapport, no matter how brief a connection with another person,and you will be greatly impressed by how much easier your interactions with others become.Ask simple questions about big things. Get to know other people's values and beliefs by asking them. For those people you're intimately connected with, what doyou know about their views on the world, other people, laws, sin, marriage, faith, spiritual fulfillment, etc.?Share your views and values too. However, be prepared to be challenged by what others think and believe without being negative, confrontational, or hating in response. You don't have to give up what you believe in but you may just learn something by truly being open to learning what others think.Feel comfortable in asking questions about other people's values; many people lo

ve the opportunity to open up some more. However, don't probe or twist their responses and be particularly caring about those people who are still working out their values, who seem confused, or who simply find this sort of conversation overwhelming. Not everyone feels comfortable opening up about values but most people do appreciate compassionate guidance.3. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Jordan-and-the-lighthouse.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Jordan-and-the-lighthouse.jpgAvoid pinning your worth on being part of a couple or even a family. At times, many of us come across as needy precisely because we feel we're not whole unlesswe're part of a couple. Being single is not always a choice but it is importantto make the most of it when we are in this situation and to continue to reach out to others as a friend and as a fellow human being rather than constantly seeming needy and lost. Learn to spend time with yourself in positive ways, seeing be

ing alone as healthy rather than lonely, and as simply another spectrum of yourcomplete self.For those who come from broken-down family situations, there can be a deep yearn


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ing to recreate a family that "works". There is nothing wrong with this desire provided you do not let it cause you to abandon enjoying the life you have untilthat is achieved; do not put your life's fulfillment on hold because of a contingency you haven't yet met (and remember that the idea of what "works" is very abstract). In addition, continue to be part of the lives of those family members whom you still relate to and care about from your broken family. They are still your family, and they can be a source of strength and grounding. For those whose

former family situation was so bad that they cannot return to any family membersfor support or love, find other people in whom you can rely upon for love and support, such as good friends, extended family members, or people who have meanta great deal to you through life. We're all one human family after all.4. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:A-hug.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:A-hug.jpgRemember that the best relationships are based on living, loving, and sharing:Living means letting others live as they choose insofar as that doesn't infringethe dignity of others around them; don't try to change people or direct their life's choices - while there is room for guidance, don't force your preferences onto others. It also means actively enjoying being with other people by being present for them and truly listening to them. Too many times we allow ourselves to

be deflected from the moment of being with someone to answer a phone or to let our minds wander over other matters than concentrating on the person before us. Cultivate being present as the best gift you can ever give to another human being.Loving means giving of one's love for others wholly without conditions. This isprobably one of the hardest things to do for most relationships because sometimes our sense of care for another person loses perspective in our sense of responsibility or feelings of worry for another person and we seek to place conditionson our love as a way of shaping the outcomes we hope to see for them. Try very hard to get beyond that temptation and simply love people for who they are. If you see warts, keep scraping until you find the gem underneath.Sharing creates harmony in a relationship. Harmony and balance are a part of a good relationship structure. Remember that relationships are not about you: they

are about the other.5. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Gerald.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Gerald.jpgGrasp the other person's perspective. Another important relationship improvementtechnique is wearing the other person's moccasins. It is impossible to truly know another person's motivations, reasons, and actions until we look with care and listen with an open heart. It is easy to dismiss a person because they have done or said things we're not in agreement with or because we feel hurt on a superficial level and prefer to lick our own wounds instead of looking at the real motivations underlying their intent. Is it possible that your own reactions are causing another person to react to you in a way that makes things harder between you? For example, if you keep pushing someone who is a reluctant talker to exposetheir feelings about you, and they end up saying even less, consider that you having been so pushy may be the cause of the other person clamming up totally. Or, if this person did finally open up but you jumped down their throat with yourannoyance or anger at the things they've said, you may simply have confirmed forthem that keeping quiet is the best option around you. Instead, try the following whenever you are in a relationship situation where you feel confrontation, unease, or misunderstandings arising between the two of you:Stop talking yourself and simply listen.Take a moment to really digest what the other person has said.Repeat your understanding of what the other person has said back to them (the gist, not verbatim).Keep summarizing what the other person has said until they agree you've nailed it.

Then start seeking a compromise rather than bombarding them with what you thinkthey "don't get" about your side of the story.6. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Best-Friends-Forever.jpg http://www.wikihow


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.com/Image:Best-Friends-Forever.jpgBe ready to face difficulties and problems within your relationships as they come up. Letting problems in a relationship fester is a recipe for fueling misunderstanding and anger, which can ultimately lead to a rupture in your relationship.Talk to one another openly about feelings, issues you have, and concerns aboutthings you've heard or being told. Avoid prejudging by gossip but do seek to clear the air when someone you interact with seems to have said or done something t

hat reverberates negatively on you.When discussing things openly, there is no need to confess all your sins and give them your whole life story. Be circumspect about what you say and get to the point. Making up sob stories to have others feel sorry for you wears thin very quickly.7. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Owninguptoitall.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Owninguptoitall.jpgBe willing to take full responsibility for your own words and actions if you want your relationships to work. After childhood, you are expected to be responsible for what you say and do; unfortunately, there are many adults unable to graspthis simple notion and who feel safer, for one reason or another, in placing blame for their own inadequacies and actions onto others. After a time, this causes

relationships to falter because nobody wants to be at the receiving end of being blamed for things all the time, and it is both boring and exhausting to be around someone who constantly blames others but never takes personal responsibility. One very fast way to improve many relationships is to remove blame from the equation, to accept responsibility where it's due, and to find solutions instead of complaining.8. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Two-very-special-friends.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Two-very-special-friends.jpgGrow together. Expecting someone to remain the same person they were 5, 10, or 20 years ago is both unrealistic and unfair. Do you want to be remembered as thesame person you were 20 years ago, or have you grown and changed in that time? Good relationships make space for growth and both parties accept this growth in each other. In fact, not only allow this space but nurture it; help the person to

become more and more the person they feel best as, and help them to grow theirstrengths and rely upon those. Bringing out the best in others is one of the greatest experiences of being part of relationships, whether it's family, lovers, students, staff, coworkers, friends, customers, whoever!Remember, that as each of you grow, the changes don't necessarily mean the end of a relationship; instead, it's just a different type of relationship. If you can accept the fact that your relationship status has changed, it may be the beginning of something completely special in a new way. Naturally though, some growthmeans that you grow apart and things aren't compatible anymore. That's normal too but just be sure you really are unable to reach acceptance before finally cutting ties.9. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Nurturetime2.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:Nurturetime2.jpgNurture your relationships. Any living being and any living relationship needs nurturing to flourish; left alone, left untended, left uncared for, and the survival rate is not good. This means setting aside time, however brief, to spend with this person. In intimate relationships, the time needed together will be far greater than the time for a boss with an employee or a retailer with a customer,but in every single case, the time spent must be dedicated, focused, and of quality, in order to nurture the relationship. Give your full attention, show that you care and that you're interested, and be mentally and emotionally available when you spend time with another.If someone lives far away from you, send them an email now and then, or call them up. Arrange to meet up occasionally, or if that's impossible, try a video linkchat. All our amazing technology makes it possible to seem like you're in the r

oom with another person halfway across the world, so make the most of it!10. http://www.wikihow.com/Image:You-are-awesome.jpg http://www.wikihow.com/Image:You-are-awesome.jpg


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Believe, trust, and assume good faith. Believing in people and trusting them isnot always easy. Certainly, there are people who will abuse your trust and won'tlive up to your belief in them. However, it is always far better to assume thatothers will do the right thing and that they will seek to live up to your belief in them than to view the world through fearful or angry lenses. By all means use your wits and common sense about what doesn't feel right when interacting with other people you don't want to end up physically harmed or emotionally abused bu

try to be a source of encouragement and enlightenment for other people in your life by giving them an indication that you do believe and trust in them above all. It is far harder for people to break trust and to let another person down whenthey are fully aware of that trust and belief and that to break it they must make active choices that bring about harm. In many situations where coercion is absent, assuming good faith about a fellow human being will bring you the reward of a much improved relationship, and could even result in a lifelong commitment to one another as friends or trusted partners.Stand behind those you trust. Show others that you support them and believe in them too.People are more complex than we often give them credit for. In many cases this is because it's easier in our time-poor lives to assume things in black and white

so that we can get on with our lives. However, this often does a disservice toanother human being because we assume things that are often wrong or mistaken and in doing so, we simplify them to their discredit. Instead, seek to understandmore and in doing so, it's likely you'll learn more about yourself too.

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TipsDon't worry if things seem to be going a bit slow - relax. The best relationships are those that burn slow - like a candle.Relationships are iterative. This means that you're: knowing, understanding, believing, and trusting one another simultaneously and repeatedly.Omit the words "I told you so" from your vocabulary. Nothing is less helpful and

more annoying.If your partner, friend, or other person you're relating with is bummed about something, don't try to tell them what they could have done to make it better. It's too late for that. They have come to you for support. Hindsight is 20-20, theyprobably already know what they should have done differently. Just say "That really sucks" or "I'm sorry that happened to you" etc. and be there for them, or at least be understanding without criticism. Nothing is worse than going to another person for comfort on a bad day and hearing what you "should've" or "could've" done.Relationships are give and take but both the give and the take must be evenly balanced to ensure a healthy outcome.

WarningsAvoid games and playing with each other's feelings. This doesn't improve your relationships; it manipulates people and leaves you thinking you have a relationship when you don't because it's all one-sided.It is important to remember that although people's behavior can change, their basic personality stays the same.Avoid making an intimate relationship about sex. Once you do that, the relationship is primarily about sex, and not about getting to know one another. It's veryhard to turn back from that which is why some people are adamant about not having sex before marriage. And as enjoyable as sex is, it is never strong enough tomake a life-lasting bond in and of itself.

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Untitled10 Tips to Improve Every Relationship in Your