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Page 1: Greetings & Introduction

INTRODUCTION

1. THE CORRECT FORM.2. THE PREVAILING INTRODUCTION AND

INFLECTION.3. OTHER FORMS OF

INTRODUCTION 4. FORMS OF

INTRODUCTION TO AVOID.

5. HAIL AND FAREWELL.

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THE FOUR ESSENTIALS

1. STAND UP.- Applies to men & women alike. If you are seated, failing to rise could suggest that you think the other person is unimportant.

2. SMILE AND MAKE EYE CONTACT . Your smiles conveys warmth, openness, and interest in the person you are meeting. Making eye contact shows that you are focussed.

3. STATE YOUR GREETINGS . The direct “How do you do?” or “Hello” have long been regarded as standard. Save “Its so nice (great) to meet you” for those you have heard something positive about.

4. SHAKE HANDS . A proper hand shake lasts about three seconds; the clasped hands are pumped once or twice and then unclasped, even if the introduction drags on. Leaning in slightly expresses more enthusiasm.

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WHEN YOU ARE THE INTRODUCER

When you have to make an introduction , remember two things :

• ONE. Offer snippets of information about the people you are introducing ( their professions, perhaps, or where they are from) .

• SECOND. State their names in full.

• For example : “Ms. Mehta, this is Aditya Singh our marketing assistant. Aditya, meet Suruchi Mehta, from RIL.”

• Your choice of words when making an introduction is flexible. “I would like you to meet…” or “May I introduce….” or any other reasonably gracious phrase you feel comfortable with is fine.

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THE ALL IMPORTANT HANDSHAKE• THE GENDER QUESTION . Until recently it was

considered polite for a man to wait for a woman to extend her hand, but this is no longer customary – especially in business.

• THE PROPER GRIP . Your grip speaks volume. A limp one suggests hesitance or mousiness, & a bone – cruncher can seem overly enthusiastic or domineering – not to mention painful. A medium - firm grip conveys confidence and authority.

• THE TWO-HAND SHAKE. This kind of handshake signals warmth, it can seem presumptuous or insincere when used in a first meeting . Take care : Some people consider the two – hand shake too intimate for business, while others see it as a “power” move, intended to subtly intimidate the recipient.

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• GLOVED HANDSHAKES . When winter gloves are worn out doors, common sense prevails: You need not take them off to shake someone’s hands.

• AN OFFER REFUSED . If you extend your hand to an able – bodied person and he or she does not respond in kind, simply withdraw your hand and continue your greetings. Unless there is a extenuating circumstance, your behavior is correct and the other person’s is not.

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WHITE DOMINATES WHITE GIVING CONTROL

PROPER HANDSHAKE

HANDSHAKES

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THE GLOVE HANDSHAKE

THE DEAD FISH HANDSHAKE

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THE POLITICIAN’S HANDSHAKE

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THE WRIST HOLD

THE ELBOW GRASP

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THE UPPER ARM GRIP

THE SHOULDER HOLD

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HUGS AND KISSES . In the entertainment & fashion fields, greetings with hugs and kisses is positively de rigueur .In more traditional business settings, greetings should be less demonstrative , with kissing & hugging generally avoided.

THE KISS. Kisses on the cheek are better left to social situations. In business it is mostly avoided.

THE AIR KISS . The habit of air – kissing often looks artificial in a business meeting

BEAR HUG. For old friends - have not seen for a long time. SEMI HUG. Among businesspeople of the same sex. Each

person placing his or her arms briefly around the other person’s shoulders.

THE SHOULDER CLUTCH . This involves grabbing each other’s right upper arm or shoulder with the free hand while shaking hands.

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THE BASIC RULES OF INTRODUCTION

One person is always introduced to another. This is achieved in two ways.

• FIRST . By actual use of the word to: “ Ms. Rupa , I would like to introduce you to Mrs. Chopra.”

• SECOND. By saying the name of the person to whom the other is being introduced first without using the preposition to : “ Mrs. Chopra , may I introduce Ms. Rupa.”

• THREE BASIC RULES:

• A man is always introduced to a woman.

• A young person is always introduced to an older person.

• A less important, or prominent person is always introduced to a more important person.

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• This is often complicated, since it is sometimes difficult to decide who is more important. Except for members of your family , no woman is ever presented to a man unless he is :

• The head of a country• A member of a royal family• A church official , or• An older man in high position , such as governor.

• Members of your family, even though they may be the more prominent , are introduced to other person as a matter of courtesy.

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WHAT NOT TO SAY

• Never phrase your introduction as a command. “ Mr. Jones, shake hands with Mr. Brown.”

• When introducing two acquaintances don’t call one of the people you are introducing “ my friend.” You may say “my aunt” or “my sister”.

• Do not repeat “ Mrs. Jones – Mrs. Smith. Mrs. Smith – Mrs. Jones.” To say each name once is enough except when one is foreign or difficult to pronounce.

• Do not speak of your spouse as “Mr. Mehta” or “Mrs. Chitle” unless you are speaking to a child. To another adult, this is very rude. Refer to him or her as “my husband, Ratan”, or “my wife, Elaine”

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• SELF INTRODUCTION - NO RANK & NO STATUS.

• TOAST MASTERS / CHAIRMAN – AT FORMAL FUNCTION.

• NAME – SYMBOL OF IDENTITY - TAKING FIRST NAMES NORMALLY IMPLIES – SUPERIOR , EQUAL OR FRIENDS.

BEST START FORMALLY • NECESSARY INTRODUCTION - GUEST OF HONOUR

- DEBUTANTE - BRIDE GROOM

• LIVING TOGETHER PARTNERS: - ELLTEE - AMIABLE CONSORT - POSSLQ

A GOOD INTRODUCTION ALERTS PEOPLE TO POTENTIAL AREAS OF CONFLICTS

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UNMARRIED TO MARRIED COUPLE NO DISTINCTION IS MADE LADY TO LADY OR

GENTLEMAN TO GENTLEMAN. MEMBERS OF THE FAMILY TO THOSE OUTSIDE IMPORTANT PERSON MIGHT NOT SHAKE THE

HAND BUT ACKNOWLEDGE WITH A BOW OR NOD.

LADY INTRODUCES HER DAUGHTER “ MY DAUGHTER NEHA; IF MARRIED GIVES SURNAME.

PEOPLE IN LARGE GROUPS ARE NOT INTRODUCED.

TITLES ARE USED SPARINGLY, DUKE OR LORD . NEVER HIS GRACE OR HIS LORD SHIP, ONLY FOR Dr., JUDGE , BISHOPS.

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INVITATIONS “ The paper upon which we write , like the clothes we wear, tells

the tale of whether or no we are capable of exercising good taste or whether we are overdressed, as it were.”

ETHEL FREY CUSHING, 1930

1. Invitations can be by phone, letter or any home made hard paper.

2. The classic writing paper is unlined with matching envelopes.

3. Colours can be white, light blue & cream.4. Usage of Engraving, Thermography and ordinary

printing.5. Standard size of standard white card is 4 x 6 3/4 inches.

Acceptable size of paper 5 1/4 x 7 inches.

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6. Invitations are advanced :

Major party - 6 weeks

Dinner - 2 to3 weeks

Informal Events - 7 to10 days

7. Invitations with RSVP to be replied at the earliest.

8. Factors which determine inviting people: - Number which can mix together.

- Size of room (inside).

- Size of table (outside)

- Depth of your pocket

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INVITATION -`WHITE TIE’ OR ‘FULL DRESS’

1. Special occasion - A debutante , dance, a diplomatic ball or reception, a Mardi Gra’s ball; an important fund raising dinner.

2. Traditional full dress : a) White wing collar pique shirt. b) Crisp white pique vest. c) White pique tie. d) Classic black trousers with the formal satin stripe. e) Traditional black coat just covering the vest (tailcoat). f) Black patent shoes.

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INVITATION- “BLACK TIE” OR “BLACK TIE INVITED”

1. Smart comfortable Tuxedo, cut almost like your newest business suit.2. Traditional black. a) White shirt and vest (or cummer bund). b) Black tie or tie matching the cummer bund. c) Patent shoes.3. Cummerbund should always be worn with pleats

facing upward.

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INVITATION

Mr. and Mrs. Nitin Limay request the pleasure of your company for dinner and dancing on Saturday,

the first of August at seven o’clock at Poona club. RSVP Black Tie

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REPLY BYMarried couple:

Mr. and Mrs. Deepak Chaturvedi accept with pleasure the kind invitation of Mr.and Mrs. Nitin Limay for dinner and dance on Saturday, the first of August at seven o’clock at Pune ClubSingle person : Miss Deepa Chaturvedi regrets that she is unable to accept the kind invitation of Mr. and Mrs. Nitin Limay for dinner and dance on Saturday, the first of August

at seven o’clock at Pune Club

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HANDWRITTEN NOTES AND ANSWERS

Dear Mrs. Mehta, Will you and Mr. Mehta have dinner with us on Saturday,the seventh of July, at eight o’ clock? Hoping so much to see you then , I am Very sincerely, Neeta RanadeREPLY

Dear Mrs. Ranade,We would be delighted to have dinner with you on Saturdaythe seventh at eight o’ clock.Thank you for thinking of us. Sincerely yours, Sangita Mehta

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Dear Phyllis, Will you and John lunch with us this coming Sunday, at one

o’ clock ? Looking forward to seeing you. Affectionately, Caroline

REPLY

Dear Caroline, We are so sorry that we cannot accept your kind invitation

for Sunday because of another engagement. Thank you for thinking of us, Sincerely, Phyllis


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