A Simple ToThePoint Strategy Guide For Muslim Singles
Sharif Faizullah
How To Get Married In
10 Easy Steps
Let’s face it: nowadays, the process of getting married is too complicated and very
confusing for a Muslim single.
Whenever we get confused about something or we get stuck on something, the best thing to do is to go back to the basics, always.
That’s what this strategy guide promises you: plain, simple, and right to the point basic steps to get married.
!" #$%&#'()#*+,-,#-,*.-#*%%#-/0.1,#2()#$%&34,#-*/11#single, then ask yourself: what basic step(s) did you skip? Hmm...?
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I want you......to be different than most people.
I want you to take action.
But take action with proper knowledge and !"#$%#"&'()*+#)'# (not haphazardly).
As you go through this strategy guide, become consciously aware about the steps, so you will know:
,&#-$'%./&01#"#&/(2&$"#&)(0
,&what steps you’ve already taken, and
,&01$%&3%#43&/(2&)##+&%(&%$5# immediately.
So, let’s go to the next page and start.
Bismillah.
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,,
For a long time I have been wondering how would a Muslim man in the U.S., who is practicing +/-#4,1/5/%(6#'()#2#-&/*271,#8/",#/(#2#halal way. So I am looking to learn how to be ready for marriage and how to be a good husband and fa-ther, so that I can raise and support a practicing Muslim family. Jazakum Allahu khairan to the founders of Practimate for giving us a practi-cal way to learn more about this important aspect of our deen!
- Mohamed, North Carolina, U.S.A.
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Step 1
Before you do anything else, you MUST make the decision--consciously--that you are ready to '()#$%&4#%*+,4#+21" #2()#5,*#0244/,)9
As simple as it may sound, most singles skip this crucial step and they get confused and lost in the middle of their journey.
Tip: Discover Yourself And Your Standard
Two important things to discover here:
1. About Yourself
####:#;,21/<,#8+%#$%,9
####:#=/()#%&*#>?@#$%R(*#*%#5,*#0244/,)9
2. About Your Other Half
####:#>?A#24,#$%%%B/(5#"%4C
####:#D&21/*/,-#$%,#8/11/(5#*%#E%0.4%0/-,9
####:#D&21/*/,-#$%/11#FAG#E%0.4%0/-,#%(9
Just like many discoveries in life, you will realize that this step is not just a one-time thing. As you move forward in your marriage journey, you’ll have to adjust and tweak your standards and the qualities that are important to you.
So, BE ready to compromise.
BE ready to tweak your expectations.
!"#$%"&'()'&*+,&)-"&-")%*&'+&./%&*+,-&+'("-&()01
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Step 2
;/5+*#(%86#$%&34,#/(#%(,#%" #*+,-,#*8%#-/*&2*/%(-H
1. Optimum Situation
I,2(/(5H#@%,#AJKF#8/*+#$%&4#.24,(*-#from the very beginning and you tell your par-ents that you want to get married. (They may %4#02$#(%*#254,,9L#G+,#.%/(*#/-H#$%&#)/)#FAG#go and do something behind their back.
2. Sticky Situation
I,2(/(5H#@%&#+2M,#214,2)$#"%&()#-%0,%(,#%(#your own without the parents’ knowing and then you try to get your parents to approve your choice after-the-fact. In other words: you went and did something behind their back.
Whatever situation you’re in, you MUST---must, must, must---bring your parents on board.
Know this: there is always a way to bring your parents on board, regardless of your parents being liberal (low challenge), traditional (some challenge), or conservative (more challenge).
MEN: If you can’t talk to your own dad, don’t talk to a sister (about marriage). Man up!
WOMEN:#!" #$%&#E2(3*#'()#2#82$#*%#5,*#*+/-#across to your dad or mom, don’t talk to a brother (about marriage). Be smart!
2"'&*+,-&3)-"/'4&$/5+05"%&$/&'("&3-+#"44
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Step 3 Prepare your marriage resume
Some people call it biodata.
An online 4"(*.# has very similar elements.
In essence, a marriage resume is a bait to attract the type and the quality of prospects you want.
Marriage resume is only for the purpose of get-*/(5#0244/,)N#/*#/-#FAG#2#O%7#4,-&0,P
!*3-#2#4,.4,-,(*2*/%(#%" #@AQ#%&*#/(#*+,#8%41)#and it’s one of the best ways to make your avail-ability known to others, quickly.
At the same time, do realize that YOU have to become an attractive candidate to the person you want to attract. Plain and simple.
If you want to really stand out from the crowd,
then you must pay attention to the nuts and 6(.%3&(7 &$)&#-'#..#)%&8$""9$!#&"#328#:
It’s fairly easy if you are true to yourself.
@%R(*#*%#-+24,#$%&4#0244/25,#8/*+#*+,#R4/5+*S#people, of course.
This step is so crucial, we’ve dedicated an entire program for this. It’s super-duper important:
www.MarriageResume.com
;,0,07,4H#$%%&1)#82(*#*%#.4,.24,#$%&4#marriage resume mainly for your prospects, but you must also keep their parents in mind.
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Step 4
@%&#E2(#/(/*/2*,#*+,#-,24E+#$%&4-,1"6#%4#$%&#E2(#initiate the search together with your family, or your family may initiate the search without you.
?%8,M,4#/*#+2..,(-6#$%�&-*#make sure that your availability is known to others.
T%#FAG#2--&0,#*+2*#.,%.1,#8/11#2&*%02*/E211$#know you’re available just because you’re single.
People cannot read your mind.
You have to utilize all proper venues and be smart about it.
A*+,48/-,6#/" #$%&#O&-*#-/*#24%&()6#*+,(#)%#(%*#expect someone to knock on your door.
Search ACTIVELY.
Bonus Tip for MEN:
Start saving for your mahr--consistently.
Start today.
Bonus Tip for WOMEN:
Figure out two things:
:#>+$#$%&34,#5%/(5#U%4#+2M,#5%(,L#*+4%&5+#$%&4#education/degree and how it would contribute to the success of your future marriage
:#?%8#0&E+#easy mahr you would ask from him
6)7"&*+,-&)5)$0)8$0$'*&3,80$#&9:')-'&4")-#($/;<
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Step 5
There are two parts to this story:
Part one is GETTING married.
Part two is STAYING married.
As you may already know, getting married does FAG#,V&21#staying married.
Go look at any building you like and ask the builder how they worked on the foundation.
G+,#*211,4#2()#7,**,4#*+,#7&/1)/(5#/-6#$%&311#'()#out that the foundation for that building is deeper and stronger.
The same is true for marriage.
So, the foundation for your future marriage must#7,#7&/1*#WAFX#7,"%4,#$%&#-2$#I do.
Amongst many other essential topics, in Finding Your Other Half DVD Program, you will learn:
:#Where Do I Start?
:#Y0#!#;,2)$#=%4#I244/25,C
:#Do I Have To Fall In Love To Find Love?
:#?%8#T%#!#X,*#I$#J24,(*-#!(M%1M,)C
:#How Do I Make My First Move?
:#?%8#Z2(#!#X&242(*,,#G+,#[&EE,--#A" #I$#I244/25,C
:#Am I Attractive To The Person I Want To Attract?
:#?%8#G%#I2B,#G+,#;/5+*#T,E/-/%(#KM,4$#G/0,
=")-/&(+>&'+&?)7"&*+,-&4")-#(&)/%&*+,-&1,',-"&?)--$);"&4,##"441,0&
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Step 6
>+2*#)%,-#R02B/(5#$%&4#'4-*#0%M,S#0,2(C
It means:
:# Find out important information about the person you’re interested in
:# Evaluate the information you collected
:# Let the other party know that you exist, you’re available, and you’re interested
@%&#E2(#'()#.4%-.,E*-#,/*+,4#%(#$%&4#%8(#2()#*+,(#.4,-,(*#*+,0#*%#$%&4#"20/1$#A;#$%&4#"20/1$#may present someone for you.
Women are not usually#,\.,E*,)#*%#02B,#*+,#'4-*#0%M,6#7&*#*+,$#[?AQWT#02B,#*+,#'4-*#0%M,#/" #they are interested, via a third party, asap.
I2B,#-&4,#*+2*#$%B,#*+,#;!X?G#0%M,
I2B/(5#*+,#>;AFX#0%M,#E2(#7,#V&/*, damaging for both parties.
Just in case you’re wondering: yes, there is a dif-",4,(E,#7,*8,,(#02B/(5#$%&4#'4-*#0%M,#%(1/(,#M,4-&-#02B/(5#$%&4#'4-*#0%M,#%(]-/*,6#/(#.,4-%(9
Depending on your situation, you must adopt the proper strategy.
>+$C
^,E2&-,#/*#
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Step 7
Again, you can do this on your own without "20/1$#U(%*#.4,",44,)L#A;#$%&#E2(#)%#*+/-#8/*+#the help of your family (preferred).
But in any case, you or the other person must have a mahram present--always, no exception.
It’s extremely important to create some boundar-ies and keep your emotions in check.
It’s also equally important to know how much of your past you should reveal and how much you are allowed to ask the other person.
;,0,07,4H#*+/-#/-#FAG#2#O%7#/(*,4M/,89
@%/11#+2M,#2E+/,M,)#*+,#02/(#5%21#%" #*+/-#/(]person communication if you feel comfortable with each other.
!*3-#Z;!G!ZYW#*+2*#$%&#&-,#*+/-#%..%4*&(/*$#*%#'()#%&*#27%&*#*+,#%*+,4#.,4-%(3-#1/",-*$1,6#current and future goals, family orientation, and other important information that will have major impact in your marriage (which many people usually overlook).
Anything that you want to ask the other person, 02B,#-&4,#@AQ#$%&4-,1" #24,#4,2)$#2()#8/11/(5#*%#2(-8,4#*+,0#'4-*6#/" #*+,$#2-B#$%&#'4-*9
So, knowing... :# 9991(0&%(&8$5#&$&4(39%9;#&*"3%&984"#339() :# B(%8/(5#8+2*#V&,-*/%(-#*%#2-B :# knowing what questions to avoid, and :# B(%8/(5#+%8#*%#B,,.#,0%*/%(-#/(#E+,EB999 ...are the keys to making this step a huge success.
B+??,/$#)'"&>$'(&*+,-&3-+43"#'94<&$/&3"-4+/
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Step 8
Salatul istikharah is one of those topics where people have too many misconceptions. So, learn how to perform salatul istikharah properly.
;,0,07,4H#/-*/kharah and istisharah go hand in hand. Istikharah is seeking guidance from Allah and istisharah is seeking advice from people.
Before you make a decision, do your best to make sure your decision is well-informed and well-advised.
Then, if it’s a yes, go to step 9.
If it’s a no, then go back to step 6 and continue searching.
At this stage, it’s very important that you know how to handle rejection with a smile.
The feeling that you want to avoid is: regret.
The best way to ensure that you don’t feel regret-ful about your decision is to go through step 7 carefully and ask advice from people who know (about) the other party before making a decision.
A(1$#*+,(#$%&311#7,(,'*#"4%0#*+/-#)/M/(,#GP S called salatul istikharah.
Bottomline: put your total trust and reliance on Allah after you’ve tied your camel.
6)7"&)&%"#$4$+/&)/%&3-)*&4)0)',0&$4'$7()-)(
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Step 9
This is the last stage in your pre-marriage jour-ney and you still need to be sharp and act smart.
First of all, you should#02B,#/*#%"'E/21#7$#5,**/(5#engaged at the beginning of this stage.
;,0,07,4H#5,**/(5#,(525,)#)%,-#FAG#5/M,#$%&#a green light to cross any boundary.
T%(3*#4&/(#/*#7,"%4,#/*#,M,(#-*24*-P##[,4/%&-1$9
At the same time, realize that marriage is a social, legal, and religious contract.
So, don’t make the mistake of showing up on the wedding day and signing a paper without know-ing what’s really in it (or even worse, signing it under pressure or out of shyness/courtesy).
Letting others take control over how your wed-ding would be is one thing, but don’t let other .,%.1,#),E/),#8+2*#@AQ;#"&*&4,#0244/25,#E%(-tract should be like. Get on the driver’s seat.
!*3-#$%&4#0244/25,6#2"*,4#2119##!-(3*#/*C
F,5%*/2*,#),*2/1-#-&E+#2-#*+,#02+46#-E+,)&1,6#wedding cost, guests, preparation etc.
@,-6#(,5%*/2*/%(#/-#2(#24*9
So, negotiate these details with the other party 8/*+#'(,(,--6#E24,6#2()#2(#%.,(#0/()9
C";+'$)'"&'("&%"')$04&)/%&3-"3)-"&*+,-&?)--$);"&#+/'-)#'
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Step 10
Say “I do.”
In one way, this step is the simplest:
_&-*#-+%8#&.#%(#*+,#8,))/(5#)2$#2()#-2$H#R!#)%9S
At the same time, this could shake you up a little: you’ll realize that you’re just about to let go of your single half-empty life and enter into a mar-riage with this other amazing person.
A"'E/211$6#2-#-%%(#2-#7%*+#%" #$%&#-2$#I do, you’ll become a married couple (not before that).
At this stage, you want to focus on two things:
1. Enjoy each other and make the start amazing
`9#X,*#4,2)$#"%4#*+,#'4-*#$,24#%" #0244/25,#2()#7,#mentally, emotionally, and practically prepared to tackle new challenges and new responsibilities
that will come up.
[,,6#+,4,3-#*+,#*+/(5H#/" #$%&#Y;K#8,11].4,.24,)6#all these challenges will become sources of renewing your commitment to each other and making your bond even stronger.
That is only if you are well-prepared.
The two concepts that you want to be familiar with are: #-4#'%$%9() and compromise.
Proper understanding and application of those two words is the key to unlock the success of your future marriage.
Step 0
F%6#*+2*3-#(%*#2#*$.%9##!*#is step 0 (zero) because following are a few critical action items that you want to be fully engaged in throughout your KFG!;K#.4,]0244/25,#O%&4(,$H
D"?"?8"-&'+EEE:# Keep lowering your gaze
:# a,,.#02B/(5#)&b223
:# Fast frequently and be actively patient
:# [,,#8+2*#-*,.-#$%&3M,#*2B,(#/(#*+,#.2-*N evaluate what worked and what didn’t; repeat steps that did work
:# Enjoy the journey
:# a,,.#*+,#)%%4#E1%-,)#*%#*%\/E#.,%.1,
:# Get involved#/(#)2b82+#8%4B6#MSAs, 
Take
Action
You can
Do
Nothing
,,
Knowledge
without
action is
fruitless.
X%#*+4%&5+#*+,#Rcd#-*,.-#2*#2#512(E,S#%(#*+,#(,\*#.25,#2()#-,,#8+2*#-*,.#$%&34,#!F#E&44,(*1$9
If you’re at a later stage but you skipped any of *+,#.4,M/%&-#-*,.-6#*+,(#IYaK#[Q;K#*%#5%#72EB#and complete all the previous steps.
;,0,07,4H#%(,#%" #*+,#B,$-#*%#*4&,#-&EE,--#/-#-&-per-fast speed of implementation, which is the amount of time (seconds/minutes/days/weeks/0%(*+-e$,24-e),E2),-L#@AQ#*2B,#*%#/0.1,0,(*#something after you learn it.
A46#/" #$%R(*6#$%&#E2(#-/*#72EB6#8211%8#%M,4#your excuses some more and do nothing.
@%&311#-%%(#),M,1%.#U%4#$%$#214,2)$#+2M,#developed) a victim mindset (a belief that says: you are a victim of your circumstances and you cannot take responsibility for your life).
If that’s the case, then get off your butt NOW and make today the day you start taking FULL responsibility for everything that happens in your life. Everything. 100%.
or
1 !"#$%"&'()'&*+,&)-"&-")%*&'+&./%&*+,-&+'("-&()01
2 2"'&*+,-&3)-"/'4&$/5+05"%&$/&'("&3-+#"44
3 Prepare your marriage resume
4 6)7"&*+,-&)5)$0)8$0$'*&3,80$#&94')-'&4")-#($/;<
5 =")-/&(+>&'+&?)7"&*+,-&4")-#(&)/%&*+,-&1,',-"&?)--$);"&4,##"441,0
6 6)7"&*+,-&.-4'&?+5"&@&A$/%&3-+43"#'4&@&B+/'$/,"&4")-#($/;
7 B+??,/$#)'"&>$'(&*+,-&3-+43"#'94<&$/&3"-4+/
8 6)7"&)&%"#$4$+/&)/%&3-)*&4)0)',0&$4'$7()-)(
9 C";+'$)'"&'("&%"')$04&)/%&3-"3)-"&*+,-&?)--$);"&#+/'-)#'
10 Say “I do.”
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10 steps )'&)&;0)/#"
Take The
Fast Track
You can
Figure It Out
By Yourself
If you want to beneift from what thousands of others have gone through and the lessons they have learned, combined with decades of real-life experience of our expert faculty members, then I invite you to join Practimate’s training today.
!" #$%,#;KYWW@#-,4/%&-#27%&*#'()/(5#$%&4#other half and want to do things the right way, then you MUST take advantage of this opportu-nity before the door is closed.
A(#*+,#%*+,4#+2()6#/" #$%R(*#*%#'5&4,#/*#%&*#7$#yourself and take months and perhaps years doing so, that is your choice.
Even if you take this route, we highly encourage you to be a person of action, not a person of reaction.
Simple.
>2--2120&#bY12$B&0
or
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