Strategies for Dealing with

Challenging Personalities

Dr. Wendy Truvillion –

Alhambra HS Athletic Director

Phoenix, AZ

Scott Dorsett, CMAA –

Director of Athletics, The Webb SchoolBell Buckle, TN

48th National Athletic Directors

Conference

What are Challenging

Personalities?

What makes for the confrontation of a “challenging

personality”?

Disgruntled parents and coaches

Game day Officiating

Dismissal from team

Work place conflict

3

The Mindset of the CP

“One man could lead this team to glory… that man was busy!”

Kicking and Screaming Video

4

Types of behaviors

• Some troublesome behaviors

Anger, Sarcasm, Obstinate-Rigid, Backbiters, Denigrating/Condescending

• Show of Hands - anyone not have an issue? Are You Alone?

• Questions That We Will Address Today

• Is it getting worse?

• Why does this behavior exist or persist?

• What are its causes?

• What are strategies for dealing with it?

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The Mind Set of the CP

Each person is responsible for his / her:

• Personal conduct

• Communications

• Perceptions of others

You cannot be challenged unless you allow the challenging conduct of another to do so.

• You must remain in control

REMEMBER

• CPs often do not feel that their conduct is improper and thus feel no need to change.

The past experiences of CPs are keys to understanding them.

6

The Mind Set of the CP

• May feel they will always be victimized because of past experiences with:

Unfairness

Mistreatment

Misunderstandings

• CPs May believe the world is bad and thus make concerted efforts to prove everyone else is unfair – including ADs

• May be insensitive to the feelings of others, don’t care about effect of their behavior, and don’t want to communicate.

• It is NOT just YOU!!!!!!

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Common Traits of CP’s

• They may not be targeting you –

• They are demonstrating the only behavior that has ever been effective for them.

• They have become comfortable with –

• Their behavior because it creates predictable responses from others in the environment.

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CP Profiles That Create

Challenges For ADs

• Advocacy for the Child

• Unwillingness to Change

• Greed and unrealistic expectations

• Mental illness

• Physical illness, stress, mental fatigue

• Public institutions are viewed as personal service

agencies

• Increased activism and investigative efforts

• Distrust of public institutions

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Administrative Behaviors That

Contribute To Distrust

• Failure to communicate concerning policies,

regulations and procedures.

• Failure to respond to complaints or issues in a

timely manner.

• Failure to tell the truth when a staff member is

wrong.

• Failure to apologize when a staff member is wrong.

• Treating parents or students in a condescending

manner.

• Unprofessional treatment or discussion of children.

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Four Misconceptions About Anger

1. “That” Made Me Angry (The myth suggest that an external event or condition made them angry)

2. Expressing Anger Gets Rid of It (It maytemporarily but success with anger reinforces it and increases probability of replication.)

3. Anger Is Helpful Because it Creates An Assertive Personality – (that breaks down relationships)

4. If You Don’t Get Angry, You Get Stepped On

(Describing one’s feelings provides a better alternative.)

Strategies for Dealing with

Challenging Personalities

Be calm…

Understand the person’s intentions…

Get some perspective from others…Let the person know

where you are coming from…

Let the person know where you are coming from…

Build a rapport…

Treat the person with respect…

Focus on what can be actioned upon…

Escalate to higher authority for resolution…