Week 4 – 4 tips for writing smoothly

Word choice feedback

Fill in the blanks

• North of Tokyo (……..…)• in northern Tokyo(……..)• south of Japan (……….)• in the south of Japan (….)• Located … the middle of• The Sumidagawa runs …..

Asakusa.• Yokohama is … Tokyo Bay

Chiba has the same climate ( ….) Tokyo.

• It is near to the sea • important place of

tourism • It has the same climate

which Japan has. • Sometimes it is snow. • Hokkaido is the north of

Japan. • centre of the Japan’s

industry

• It is near the sea,• important place for

tourism• It has the same climate

as Japan.• Sometimes it snows• Hokkaido is the north of

Japan.• centre of Japanese

industry or• industrial centre of Japan

Correcting the sentences

Structure feedback

1. Topic sentences: A

Is the first sentence in a paragraph.It should connect to the topic – eg Industry It has rice.Rice is an important industry in

Yonezawa.

Topic sentences - Bshould have a clear subject .

• Not “It” • It is famous for beef. X – Yonezawa is famous for beef O

• It has tourism. X– Tourism is an important industry in Kyoto O

2. Avoid repeating the same words.

• Kyoto is famous in Japanese history. It has many famous temples. Kinkakuji is particularly famous. Kyoto is also famous for yatsuhashi.

•

• Kyoto is an important city in Japanese history. It is famous for temples such as Kinkakuji. Yatsuhasi is a specialty food of Kyoto.

3. Avoid repeating the same sentence pattern.

• Yokohama is the second biggest city in Japan. It is on the Kanto Plain. It is in Kanagawa. It is south of Tokyo.

• • Yokohama is the second biggest city in Japan.

It is in Kanagawa, just south of Tokyo, on the Kanto Plain.

4. Use paragraph style

• Kyoto is an important city in Japanese history. • It is famous for temples such as Kinkakuji. • Yatsuhasi is a specialty food of Kyoto.

• Kyoto is an important city in Japanese history. It is famous for temples such as Kinkakuji. Yatsuhasi is a specialty food of Kyoto.

A good paragraph has

1. Repeating the same structure.2. Repeating the same word.

A good paragraph avoids

1. A clear topic sentence2. Paragraph form.

Writing smoothly

• My home is in Kanagawa,• In summer it’s very hot.• It has the same climate

as Japan.• Sometimes it snows• Hokkaido is the north of

Japan.• centre of Japanese

industry or• industrial centre of Japan

• My home is Kanagawa. • In summer it’s a lot of

hot • It has the same climate

to Japan. • Sometimes it is snow. • Hokkaido is the north of

Japan. • centre of the Japan’s

industry

Marks

• Clear topic sentence - 3• Detailed information - 5• Paragraph form – 2 • Grammar- 5

• Each paragraph should be 30 – 50 words long.