How to Crush Your Employees’ Souls in Eight Easy Steps

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  • Lets start with onboarding.The best way to instill confidence is to

    let your new hires figure everything out

    for themselves. Dont give them any

    guidance, expectations, or tools to do

    their jobs. Confusion builds character

    and tests their problem-solving skills.


  • Now, on to meeting the team. Your new hires wont remember

    everyones names, anyway, so dont

    bother introducing them to anyone

    except their immediate coworkers. This

    helps create cliques and we all know

    how great those are. Just like high

    school. Good times!


  • Its time to set some goals. Or is it? You dont have any, and you

    seem to be doing fine. You think. Yeah.

    Everythings fine. Although no, no,

    its fine. You navigated your own path

    and look how you turned out. Awesome.

    Probably awesome.


  • You say its your birthday? Shhh. These things are nobodys business. You dont want to pry or

    embarrass anyone by revealing that

    they were :gasp: born. And cake is

    fattening. Cards are distracting. Singing

    is loud and disruptive. Is celebrating

    someones special day really worth all

    this? You know the answer.


  • Something big is happening.

    Youre launching a new initiative, or you

    have important company news, or its

    holiday time. Heres what to do: send an

    all-staff email! Or, better yet, circulate

    an inter-office memo. Be sure to make

    it quick and to the pointthat way

    everyone will get back to work sooner.


  • Whos doing a great job? Who knows?! No news is good news.

    Theres a reason that saying took

    offand it certainly applies here. You

    wouldnt want to send your employees

    the message that theres extra to

    be earnedjust for going above and

    beyond. That could start a trend.


  • Its been a year already? Thats great, but the only anniversaries

    that really matter are the big ones. Wait

    just four more years and you can reward

    their loyalty and contributions with a

    sincere handshake. In another five years,

    a knife set. Oh, just think how valued

    theyll feel! Once every five years.


  • And, now, its time to retire. Whew. You shouldnt even have to

    worry about this one. If you followed

    along, there wont be any celebrations

    necessary. Theyve all come and gone,

    and come and gone. The trick is to max

    them out at three years. Or less. Thats

    how you know its working!



  • Wed love to say: just kidding!

    But its no joke. Getting employee

    engagement and motivation wrong

    is all too commonand often way

    more work than getting it right. In

    the long run, anyway. What does

    getting it right look like?

    Download What Will Make Your Company Thrive? today. Then, call us at 888.919.7600 to learn more

    or click here to schedule a demo.