5 Ways To Attract New Love And Have The Best Holiday EVER By Julie Ferman

It's the perfect time of year to warm up to someone new in your life.

The holidays are a great time for dating. Our hearts are vulnerable and those twangs of nostalgia tug

at each of us, reminding us of our innate need to connect with our fellow man.

Here's how to take advantage of the sappy season ahead of us:

1. Sprinkle in some proactive love energy.

This the season for giving, yes? Do something this year that you've never done, or that has hit the

back burner for years. Pick up one manageable box of holiday cards and send one out to the people

in your life who matter most to you. Say thank you for the contribution this person has made you, as

if it's this person's last holiday season on the planet.

2. Plan a plus-one party.

Don't plan it for December, but for mid-January; break up the mid-winter humdrums when more folks

will be available to attend. It could be a fancy event, but some of the best parties are simple happy-

hour gatherings at pool halls, bowling alleys or a dart throwing contest at a local dive bar.

The trick? Each person's ticket for admission is to bring a fun, opposite sex friend ... someone you

don't yet know. You, as the organizer make damn sure you get each person's name, email address

and phone number, which is oh-so-valuable for relationship building for whom? Yes, for you; your

just reward for organizing the event.

And of course, then you get to follow up with each person who attends, developing new friendships

and prospective amorous opportunities.

3. Be the harmonizer at each of the holiday gatherings you attend.

There's always a drunk uncle, a grumpy teenager or a catty co-worker to deal with. You can count

on it, so plan for it. Take a few moments before walking in the door to ground and center yourself,

remember who you are, and to call forth your best self.

In true Harry Potter style, throw on an imaginary cloak that will shield you from negativity, hostility,

animosity, mean-spiritedness, or just low-level and unconscious energy in the room. There will be

bad situations present—as every family, organization and community has its "stuff"—so be prepared

psychologically and emotionally, and do all you can to not make a bad situation worse.

Let the little comments go, and resist the temptation to throw gasoline on any kindling fires. Watch

for those hot spots, avoid them when you can, and if you do find yourself in the midst of a firestorm,

resist the temptation to engage, and be the calming influence instead.

4. Don't drink.

Can you do this? If you're the one who always heads straight to the bar, try being the person who

doesn't. Imagine that. Go for a cranberry juice and a splash of soda (a lime helps), and see what it's

like to have your attention focused outward on other people, making sure they are having a great

time. This alone can change everything for you.

5. Look for opportunities and watch for surprises.

Each day of this holiday season, make it your mission to brighten the life of those you cross paths

with each day. This includes the folks behind the wheels of the cars on your way to work during the

morning commute. There's a real, live being in that car whose heart aches over something.

Look for those little opportunities to generate a smile on the face of a total stranger. Pick up the

phone to call your mom, your sister, or that cousin you haven't talked to in years. Calling forth these

actions will put karmic wheels in motion for you, and you will see lovely surprises coming back your

way. I promise!

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