When Destiny Offers Her Hand Reach Out and Grab

It

By Meeta Kaur

My privilege and responsibility as a Sikh-American writer

Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being. With freedom comes

responsibility. For the person who is unwilling to grow up, the person who

does not want to carry his/her own weight, this is a frightening prospect.

Eleanor Roosevelt

Our responsibility as Sikhs

Until the great mass of the people shall be filled with the sense of responsibility for each other’s

welfare, social justice can never be attained.

Helen Keller

Questions

• Is there a relationship between free will and destiny according to the Guru Granth Sahib

• How do free will and destiny work together in our lives as Sikhs?

• Can free will impact pre-determined karma that is in play?

• How does love shape our destinies as Sikhs?

Methodology for discussion

• We will engage in a story-telling exercise to tease out the questions

• Received permission to tell this individual’s story

• Reflect on patterns and the impact of those patterns

Discussion of Reflections

• In transparency, I am looking at these concepts through the lens of a story and my own biases

• I invite the audience to participate in the discussion during the Q and A so we can draw a more comprehensive conclusion

• Every voice counts• There is no right or wrong in these discussions

Story time

• Relax• Close your eyes• Take in the story like a breath of air

Dhanna Singh Malhi

Defining moments for Dhanna Singh

1. His mother passing at the age of 2 -- lost his primary bond, was unaware of what a mother’s love is

2. His father sending him to his Mama Ji’s home for education at the age of 8 – groomed to be a professional in the U.S.

3. Coming to America to practice medicine 4. A heart attack every 10 years – a chance to pause

and reflect at the way he was living (self-created)

Reflections on Dhanna Singh’s story

“O Nanak, only your actions shall go with you; the consequences of your actions cannot be erased.” Guru Arjan Dev Ji, Page 460

Reflections: Dhanna Singh decided to study 16-18 hours a day building up his destiny to become a doctor. Success begets success.

Reflections Continued

“O Nanak, only your actions shall go with you; the consequences of your actions cannot be erased.” Guru Arjan Dev Ji, pg 460Reflection: When Dhanna Singh chose success and money over developing his relationships with his wife and children, his decisions caught up with him in the form of heart attacks and his karmic debt as a householder

Reflections Continued

“O Nanak, only your actions shall go with you; the consequences of your actions cannot be

erased.” Guru Arjan Dev Ji, pg 460

Reflection: Again, Dhanna Singh chooses to work equally as hard to reverse his situation

with his family members and works at his relationships continuously non-stop for 5 years

rebuilding trust and respect

A different lens on the same story

Love is not an idea that a person may be taught or given, we learn what love is through experience. --

Wahe Guru Net

Reflection: To fulfill his duties as a Sikh, Dhanna Singh had to learn what love is in the absence of his

parent’s love. Wahe Guru equipped him to climb this learning curve and his free will allowed him to keep

making that choice continuously changing his destiny with his family.

Reflection

Why was it important that Dhanna Singh learn these virtues, learn the traits we need to love

unconditionally?

As Sikhs, I believe we are not only taught to love our families unconditionally, but also love humanity

unconditionally. When we understand our duty, our destiny as the ability to love and serve humanity

unconditionally, we can restore the vision of the world the Gurus blueprinted 500 years ago.

Reflections

“According to one’s desires, one’s condition is determined” (Guru Nanak Dev Ji, p.1342) “That alone is a good deed, O Nanak, which is done by one’s own free will” (Guru Angad Dev Ji, p.787)

What seems like a contradiction based on Dhanna Singh’s Narrative

“By one’s own actions, nothing can be done; destiny was pre-determined from the very beginning. By great

good fortune, I meet my God, and then all pain of separation departs” (Guru Arjan Dev Ji, p.135)

Dhanna Singh realized that his mother’s passing shaped him, defined him, and he also realized that he could use free will to change the destiny he had built

up from circumstances out of his control. We can overcome anything.

Our destiny as Sikh Americans

In understanding that as Sikhs, we determine our own destinies, we are primed to not only be

social justice advocates on behalf of our own community, but also defend the the rights of

other minority communities around the country/world.

We can pre-determine the destiny we hand to our children starting now