Introduction to Pastoral Care October 15, 2012. Shadowlands

Introduction to Pastoral Care

October 15, 2012

Shadowlands

Human Suffering

Why?

Psalms 46: 1-3 & 8-11Isaiah 43: 1-3Mark 4:35--40

Stay Calm

Help People Manage Their Fears & Anxiety

Regressive Society

Regressive Society

• Reactivity• Herding• Blaming• Quick Fix• Lack of Well-Differentiated Leadership

When the anxiety of a community goes up.

• We don’t listen well & we aren’t interested in the concerns of others.

• We focus on what we think are the problems other people have rather than focusing on our own issues.

• We try to change “them” rather than focusing on changing “us”.

When the anxiety of a community goes up.

• We aren’t open about what our real concerns are.

• We don’t think reasonably or objectively.• We become less flexible.• We get defensive and determine to win at all

costs.• We make monsters out of those with an

opposing opinion.

When the anxiety of a community goes up.

We don’t look for common ground and we refuse to work together toward a solution to

the situation.

“When one member of a family can calmly state his own

convictions and beliefs, and take action on his convictions without criticism of the beliefs of others &

without becoming involved in emotional debate,

Then other family members will start the same process of

becoming more sure of self and more accepting of others.”

Murray Bowen

Goals

1. Achieve an inner calmness – become less anxious.

2. Quit reacting to everything & everyone.3. Think through your own principles, beliefs

and convictions.4. State your own convictions & beliefs

Goals

5. Take action on your beliefs & convictions.6. Refuse to criticize the beliefs of others.7. Refuse to get involved in emotional debate

with others who object to your beliefs.8. Stay connected and interested.

Hospitals

• Don’t stay too long.• Don’t touch the bed.• Do pray.• Do listen.• Do care.

Emergency Room

• Ask the nurse• Be courageous• Be considerate• Be calm

Intensive Care

• Be considerate of the family regarding time limits or the number of people who can visit at one time.

• Talk to the nurse & follow hospital protocol.• Be perceptive regarding the needs of the

family.

The Dying

Be a caring presence Reflect God

Six Stages of Grief

• Denial• Anger• Bargaining• Depression• Acceptance• Christian Hope

Funerals