Hitler in the Sack

by Timothy Chilman

email: timothychilman@yahoo.com

There are twice as many biographies of Hitler as of Churchill andthrice as many as of Roosevelt and Stalin. Photo: MarianoApologeticus

Adolf Hitler. The name is synonymous with evil. He was responsiblefor the deaths of countless people. There are apparently over 700biographies of him. This is more than twice as many as of Churchilland three times as many as of Roosevelt and Stalin. And so thequestion inevitably arises: What was he like in the sack?

First of all, did Hitler have the necessary equipment? The Office ofStrategic Services (OSS), forerunner to the CIA, tracked downHitler's family doctor, Dr. Eduard Bloch, to New York, to which hehad relocated as a refugee. Dr. Bloch related that, as a child,Hitler was “genitally normal.” There are, however, widespread rumorsthat this did not last. The humorous British song from the SecondWorld War Hitler Has Only Got One Ball popularized the idea. This song wassung to the tune of Colonel Bogey, the theme of the 1957 film The Bridge onthe River Kwai. There are many who believe the song got it right.

Dr. Eduard Bloch in his surgery in 1938. Photo: Bundesarchiv

Researchers can always be found who will pronounce, “Investigationdemonstrates that Hitler acted very much like certain kinds ofneurotic monorchids.” However, the strongest evidence that Hitler wasmonorchic is the account of a priest, Franciszek Pawlar. He hadreceived the confession of Johan Jambor. Jambor served as a frontlinemedic in the German army during the Battle of the Somme in 1916.Jambor died in 1985 at the age of 94 but had revealed his secret tothe priest. The priest supposedly made a note of the conversationthat gave rise to this story.

Jambor collected injured soldiers for some hours. He recalled Hitler,who was referred to as “the screamer” by those present because hescreamed so much for help. Hitler's legs and abdomen were bloody. Hehad lost a testicle and inquired of the doctor attending him: “Will Ibe able to have children?” The story was confirmed by Jambor'sfriend, Blassius Hanczuch. Hanczuch recounted that after the Naziscame to power, Jambor suffered nightmares and blamed himself forsaving Hitler.

This was first reported by the sordid British tabloid the Sun. It was then repeated by print and electronic sources on both sides of the Atlantic, including some serious broadsheets. Neither the document nor any witness has been produced. German army records, however, showthat Hitler was wounded in the groin at the Somme. Ian Kershaw authored a recent, much-respected biography of Hitler. He passed comment that the wound was to Hitler's left thigh.

In 1968, then-Red Army intelligence officer Lev Bezymenski wrote TheDeath of Adolf Hitler. In it, he claimed that the Soviet autopsy of Hitler

discovered that he possessed only one gonad. He later admitted thiswas untrue and one of several alterations made at the behest of theKGB.

Allegations of Hitler's homosexuality began when he was in power. Ithas featured in a number of books. Most notable were The Pink Swastika byPastor Scott Lively and Kevin Abrams and The Hidden Hitler by LotharMachtan. The Pink Swastika's standing can be gauged by the fact that it issold by WorldNetDaily. This is the work of right-wing loonies and thebook has a discount of $12—70 percent.

Allen Ginsberg was a hip, homosexual poet. The Pink Swastika quotes himtestifying at the 1966 obscenity trial concerning William Burroughs'book, The Naked Lunch. A justice of the Supreme Court inquired of himwhether there might one day be a political party comprisinghomosexuals. Ginsberg responded it had already happened with theNazis under Hitler. The exchange was related by the Gray Lady. In the1930s, the Münchner Post, a fervently anti-Nazi newspaper, termed theNazi party a “brotherhood of poofs”.

Hip, homosexual poet Allen Ginsberg testified to the U.S. SupremeCourt that the Nazi Party was heavily homosexual. Photo: DutchNational Archives

Lothar Machtan is a German historian with impressive academiccredentials. Joachim Fest and Alan Bullock's classic biographies of

Hitler were used by him as sources. These made some of the samepoints, although they were not emphasized.

Machtan detailed the Mend Protocol, the testimony of dispatch riderHans Mend. Mend had served alongside Hitler in the Great War. Heswore up and down that he had witnessed Hitler engage in homosexualacts with a fellow runner, Ernst Schmidt. Mend was subsequently foundto be a liar and blackmailer. But he did initially make hisallegation in his memoirs before Hitler became famous and wastherefore not seeking attention. Machtan claimed that Hitler wasdenied promotion because of his ass banditry. Machtan's evidence iscircumstantial, but men have gone to the gallows on circumstantialevidence.”

During his younger years in Vienna, Hitler and his best friendfrequented areas notorious for homosexual doings. From 1910 to 1913,he stayed at a flophouse on Meldemannstrasse in Birgittenau that wasknown universally as a hotbed of butt piracy. A 70-page OSS reportthat was written in 1943 described it as having “the reputation ofbeing a place where elderly men went in search of young men forhomosexual pleasures.” The records of the police in Vienna listedHitler as a “sexual pervert,“ although no offenses are listed. Itmight have been no more than a suspicion. In May 1913, he moved toMunich, known as “a regular El Dorado for homosexuals.“ There is arecord of homosexual activities by Hitler in that city. This wasillegal. So it was the police who noted that a 22-year-old man,Joseph, declared, “I spent the whole night with him.” 18-year-oldMichael stated, “I had been unemployed for months, and my mother andmy brother were always hungry, so, at his request, I accompanied theman to his home.” Another named Franz commented, “He asked me if I'dlike to stay with him and he told me his name was Adolf Hitler.”

The previously mentioned OSS report stated that Hitler's relationshipwith his deputy, Rudolf Hess, “might have possibly bordered on thesexual.” Many have no doubt about this. The pair had spent time injail in Landsberg Castle together in 1924, sharing a cell at onepoint. Hess was apparently known as Fräulein Anna to homosexualNazis. He was reputedly a transvestite, although this is notsupported by anyone reputable.

In a letter to the New York Times, Hess' homosexuality was flatly denied

by his son, Wolf Rudiger Hess, who died in 2001. Yes, Hess marriedand had a son, but many homosexuals at that time did just that. Theson put his father's reputed homosexuality down to one of the KGB's"last-ditch efforts to humiliate the Third Reich.” This does notexplain why the OSS came out with it during the war. He also refusedto accept that his father was known as Fräulein Anna. That one,however, does not seem to be in doubt. In his 1938 book, I Knew Hitler,Kurt G.W. Ludecke wrote, "I couldn't quite see the epithet of'Fräulein,' for he was virility itself." So here was someone whospoke positively of Hess but accepted that he had this nickname.

Hitler's ascent to power was in a large part due to the influence oftwo brilliant homosexuals. Dietrich Eckart was one of the founders ofwhat would become the Nazi Party. Ernst Röhm, a fellow member of thisparty, became the head of the paramilitary Sturmabteilung(Stormtroopers). It was heavily rumored that Hitler's tolerance ofRöhm was because the latter could prove Hitler was an anal astronaut.The rumor goes that Hitler had Röhm killed in the Night of the LongKnives to deal with the problem.

Ernst Röhm, a homosexual, was instrumental in Hitler's rise to power.Photo: Bundesarchiv

Nazi was short for Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei—National Socialist German Workers' Party. In a 1931 exposé of theNazis, the Munich Post echoed Allen Ginsberg. It accused party membersof “the most shameless practices.“ These were activities forbidden byparagraph 175 of the penal code, which deemed homosexuality a

criminal offense.

Hitler formed intimate attachments to a number of men. He reportedlyreferred to one, Albert Förster, the obviously homosexual DanzigGauleiter, as “Bubi“. This was a nickname commonly used byhomosexuals for their partners.

Hitler was a model soldier during his four years in the Army. He wasexcessively submissive to his officers. He frequently volunteered toto do their washing and otherwise see to their clothes. He assumedthe feminine role. His attitude to the Hitler Youth could possibly beconstrued as motherly. David Irving is a reviled revisionisthistorian whose views caused him to be bankrupted in a libel trial.He told that wimmen who have read Hitler's book, Table Talk, “marveled athis insight into the female psyche.“

Hitler can also be placed elsewhere on the spectrum of sexuality.Hitler: the Missing Years was a book written by Ernst Hanfstängl. Hanfstänglbecame a close friend of Hitler in the 1920s after seeing him speakin a Munich beer hall but later fell out with him. He claims to havecome up with the chant of “Sieg heil.“ He recounted that his wifeonce remarked of Hitler: “Putzi, I tell you he is a neuter.”Hanfstängl attested that Hitler often stated that he would nevermarry a woman because Germany was his bride. Hanfstängl wrote areport on Hitler for President Roosevelt, which Roosevelt describedas his “bedtime reading“ during the war.

Hitler was a stalker. He resided in Linz, the third largest city inAustria, from 1898 to 1907—most of his youth. There, he becameinterested in Stefanie Isak, an attractive woman, in 1905, when hewas 16 years old. Isak was in the habit of crossing a bridge to go tothe main square at 5p.m. every evening. Hitler and his pal, AugustKubizek, would loiter in order to see her. Isak was not Jewish, buther name appears so. She went unmentioned in Hitler's officialbiography, a heavily-edited version of Kubizek's memoirs.

Hitler's friend, August Kubizek, around the time of Hitler'sinfatuation with Stephanie Isak

Hitler was too yellow to introduce himself. Words, he believed, wereunnecessary. He was convinced that Isak intuited his beliefs andagreed wholeheartedly. Kubizek displayed doubt that Hitler could knowwhat Isak thought without speaking to her. Hitler became enraged andexclaimed, “You simply don't understand because you can't understandthe truth meaning of extraordinary love.”

Stefanie Isak

Hitler would write love poems about Isak with such titles as Hymn tothe Beloved. Hitler's face lit up with “fervent ecstasy” when he readthese poems to Kubizek. He would be deliriously happy when she smiledat him and “crushed” when she ignored him.

Hitler seriously considered kidnapping Isak, with Kubizek conversingwith her mother as a distraction. He gave up on the idea for lack offunds. He then considered suicide, jumping from the Danube bridge.Isak would, of course, have to die with him. Hitler's mood lightenedin June 1906 at the Linz flower festival. There, Isak smiled at him

and threw him a flower from her festival carriage. “She loves me,” heinformed Kubizek. “You have seen! She loves me!” He kept the flowerin a locket for years. In interviews, Isak stated that she wasunaware of his interest in her.

Hitler appears to have produced a son. He met the mother, 16-year-oldCharlotte Lobjoie, in June 1917. This was during a respite fromfighting in the trenches in northern France. It occurred in Fournes-in-Weppe, a minor town west of Lille. The relationship was brief.Jean-Marie Loret was conceived when the pair was “tipsy.”

Loret was given up for adoption in the 1930s. His son claims this wasarranged by Hitler via a local nun. Loret fought the Germans at theMaginot Line in 1939 and then joined the French Resistance. He foundout the identity of his biological father from his mother after theywere reunited during the occupation. He had the same blood type asand similar handwriting to Hitler. Many felt that he resembled Hitlerphysically, with the same dimpled chin, square jaw, and piercingeyes. During the Second World War, German officers are documented ashaving given the mother envelopes of cash. She possessed signedpaintings by Hitler, one seemingly being of her.

After Loret died in 1985 at the age of 67, his son met with thedaughter of Heinrich Himmler. She was aware that Hitler had a sonfrom “her own circle.” In 2012, it was speculated that Loret'sdescendants might have had a claim to the royalties of theautobiographical Mein Kampf. It has sold millions of copies. Thisventure does not appear to have gotten anywhere.

In 1926, Mimi Reiter was a 16 year-old shop-girl in Obersalzberg, apreferred location of Hitler's. In an interview with the Germanmagazine Stern in 1959, she told of a picnic she had with Hitler insome woods. He hugged her “real tight” and kissed her, but “He didn'tknow what to do.” Hitler eventually lost interest in her, and sheattempted suicide by hanging, then married but left her husband.Rudolf Hess later enjoined her to meet with Hitler in Munich. Sheintimated that sex occurred: “I let everything happen.” A publicrelationship was not possible because Hitler could not be linked to awoman who had left her husband. By 1934, Hitler wished Reiter tobecome his surreptitious lover. But she desired marriage, and Hitlerreplied that that would have interfered with his “big mission.”

Reiter's sister confirmed Hitler's interest in her.

Mimi Reiter

In 1925, Hitler met Geli Raubal, the daughter of his half-sister. Shewas 19 years old. He fell madly in love with her, although she gaveno more than a little affection in return. He was then no more thanmember number seven of the Nazi Party. She made him neglect hispolitical duties. Rather than turn up for meetings, he would spendhis evenings strolling the parks of Munich with Raubal on his arm.Hitler's family did not take to the idea of his marrying his step-niece.

One day in 1931, after seeing Hitler, Raubal wrote him a letterexplaining why she could not marry her Onkel Alf. After posting it,she locked herself in a room and shot herself in the chest withHitler's Walther 6.35mm pistol. At the Nuremberg trials, HermanGöring remarked, “Geli’s death had such a devastating effect onHitler that it changed his relationship to all other people.”

Geli Raubal, to whom Hitler was attracted.

There are some who believe Hitler murdered Raubal because she hadbeen telling tales to Otto Strasser. This character opposed Hitlerwithin the Nazi Party. Only the briefest of autopsies took place.Almost everyone at the scene claimed that the pair had arguedviciously. The Münchner Post reported that Raubal's nose was broken. Inthe same newspaper, Hitler denied that he had argued with his gal butfailed to account for the broken nose. Raubal was buried in aCatholic cemetery. Catholicism does not permit the burial of suicidesin consecrated ground, considering suicide a sin. Hitler had fourone-time supporters who knew of Raubal's suicide murdered.

Hitler is oft-cited as the most evil man in history. There arestories that he partook of exactly the kind of sexual strangenessthat would be expected of him. It has been alleged that he was acoprophile: He got Raubal to shit in his mouth. The claim was made inan OSS report published under the title A Psychological Analysis of AdolphHitler: His Life and Legend. The source was Strasser, who had a major ax togrind but was also privy to Raubal's secrets. It often refers to thework of Freud, which has since been discredited, but neverthelesscontains a gem.

The OSS report has it that Hitler would ask Raubal to squat over himand defecate upon him. Dr. Walter C. Langer, author of the document,wrote, "We must not suppose that Hitler gratifies his strangeperversion frequently. Patients of this type rarely do and inHitler's case it is highly probable that he has permitted himself to

go this far only with his niece, Geli.” Hitler is known to have likedthis view. Röhm is widely-quoted as having commented, “He is thinkingabout the peasant girls. When they stand in the fields and bend downat their work so that you can see their behinds, that's what helikes, especially when they've got big round ones. That's Hitler'ssex life.“

There would be a very sound explanation for why Hitler enjoyed such athing. His mother was abstemious to a fault. There was never a speckof dust in the house. Hitler's toilet training is likely to have beenharsh. This usually leads to “residual tension in this area.“Fantasies become centered around the topic. Why, it might even makeyou want to conquer Europe.

Hitler's speech and writing could be construed as displaying such afixation. The subjects a person considers important enough to mentionreveal subconscious leanings. Scientific experiments have borne thisout. So we have ...

"… dragged into the dirt and filth of the lowest depths."

"Charity is sometimes actually comparable to the manure which isspread on the field, not out of love for the latter, but out ofprecaution for one's own benefit later on."

"And when the Jew turns the treasures over in his hand, they aretransformed into dirt and dung."

"You don't understand: We are just passing a magnet over a dunghill,and we shall see presently how much iron was in the dunghill and hasclung to the magnet." (The “dunghill” was the German people.)

The OSS report posited that Hitler often had shit on his mind. Anumber of historians and biographers agree that he also had shit inhis mouth.

Renate Müller was a singer and one of the most successful actressesin Germany. In the 1930s, she once appeared at the studio where sheworked, dejected. Her superior inquired why, and she told him of herone-night stand with Hitler. They both undressed, whereupon Hitlerlay on the floor and implored her to kick him. She declined. He

flagellated himself verbally until she acceded. This excited himgreatly, and he begged for more. She committed suicide soon after.

Renate Müller, with whom Hitler was romantically involved in the mid-

1930s

Eva Braun was one of the three daughters of a conventional Catholicfamily in Munich. Her school grades were average. She liked romanticnovels, Hollywood movies, gymnastics, and dancing. Upon leaving aconvent school, she began work as a studio assistant for HeinrichHoffman, the photographer of the Nazi Party. She was 17 years-old,fresh-faced, and chestnut haired when she met the 40 year-old Adolfin October 1929. He had opened a door to enter a room where Eva stoodon a ladder, giving him a good view of her legs.

Eva Braun, Hitler's squeeze

No relationship began until late in 1931, when Hitler was on therebound after the suicide of Geli Raubal. Hoffman remarked that“Never, in voice, look or gesture did Hitler behave in any way thatsuggested any deeper interest in her." Hitler treated Braun awfully.She was not allowed to be present for dinner if important guests werein attendance. He hated her wearing cosmetics, dressing in anythingbut the most unflattering clothes, smoking, and sunbathing nekkid.Fortunately, he was absent much of the time. He made his views ofwimmen abundantly clear and once informed his confidant, the Nazis'favorite architect, Albert Speer, that “A highly intelligent manshould take a primitive and stupid woman.” He occasionally purchaseddirt-cheap jewelry for Braun.

The collection of shoes Braun acquired in the course of many shoppingtrips provided little solace. Speer believed she showed “gayserenity.” She was so serene she attempted suicide twice. She shotherself in the throat, missing her jugular, in 1932 and took anoverdose of sleeping pills in 1935. These were cries for attentioninstead of determined attempts to do away with herself. Hitler wasunswayed. He never allowed the pair of them to be seen in public forfear of losing popularity with females. He declared that he was“married to the destiny of Germany.”

In 1935, Braun wrote in her diary: "If only I had never set eyes onhim! I am utterly miserable. I shall go out and buy some more

sleeping powder and go into a dreamlike state." Her cousin, GertrudeWeisker, commented that Braun was "the unhappiest woman I ever met."

Braun's friends and relatives told that she giggled upon seeing aphotograph of British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain in 1938. Itshowed him sitting atop a sofa in Hitler's flat in Munich in 1938,and she exclaimed, “If only he knew what goings-on that sofa hasseen!“

While sex appears to have occurred, it will not have been much.Hitler's valet, Heinz Linge, made known in a television interviewthat his wife was Hitler's housekeeper. She never found stains on thesheets.

Martin Amis is a bestselling author rather than expert in anyrelevant field. He holds that Hitler and Braun had sex with theirclothes on. This is because Hitler was “fanatical about hygiene” anddeclined to undress even for doctors. He would, Amis believes, reachclimax from just looking at Braun: “I imagine Eva would stand adistance away and lift her skirt. Then there would be some sort ofsoggy climax on Hitler's part, and that would be that."

Professor Theo Morell was the last of the eight personal physiciansemployed by Hitler during his time in power. People commented on hisbody odor, causing Hitler to reply: “I do not employ him for hisfragrance but for his medical care of me.” Morell professed thatHitler, like Churchill, had a low libido. Hitler and Braun hadseparate beds, but it is known that he liked her to wear chamoisleather underwear.

Professor Theo Morell, who stank like a polecat. Photo:www.holocaustresearchproject.com

Professor emeritus of medicine Hans-Joachim Neumann and historianHenrik Eberle produced the book Was Hitler Ill? It used documentaryevidence, principally the papers of Theo Morell and present-daymedical analysis. The book reads that by the end of the war, Hitlerwas taking 82 different medications.

Hitler was scared of pills, so everything was injected. Morell waschristened “Herr Reichinjektionmeister” by Hermann Göring. Göring wasaddicted to morphine by the end of the war and not one to talk.Hitler was given a drug with the same intended effect as Viagra. Itcontained testosterone and was made from the semen and prostateglands of young bulls.

It has been widely-speculated that Hitler had syphilis. Morell'snotes show that Hitler had an abnormal heartbeat, an indicator ofsyphilitic aortitis. Nazi hunter Simon Wiesenthal was one to affirmthat Hitler acquired the disease from a Jewish prostitute in Vienna.This was in 1908 and explained his pathological dislike of The Tribe.From 1941, Hitler received regular injections of iodide salts, then atherapy for cardiac syphilis. His restrictive palsies, gastric pain,chest pain, neck pustules, dizziness, encephalitis, and oh-so-well-documented flatulence are all associated with syphilis. He tookconsiderable quantities of an anti-flatulence medication. Thisincluded strychnine, a nerve agent which is an ingredient of ratpoison. Robert Berger, a cardiac surgeon at Harvard Medical School,

concluded that Hitler's symptoms were “consistent with syphilis.”Morell was one of Germany's principal experts in the disease.

Hitler may have been diagnosed with syphilis at a field hospital in1918. There, he recovered from a gas attack. It is possible thatdocumentary evidence of Hitler's syphilis was destroyed on the ordersof Heinrich Himmler.

And there we have it. Hitler's girlfriend could expect chamoisleather underwear, much farting, and possibly syphilis. There wouldnot have been much sex, and even what there was would have beenpharmaceutically-assisted. She would, perhaps, have shat in hismouth. Sooner or later, it is very likely that she would have killedherself. At least the uniforms were cool.

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