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    PROBLEMSand how to face them?

    Swami Aksharatmananda

    PublishersSri Ramakrishna Seva Samithi

    Bapatla - 522 101Andhra Pradesh, India

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    7Problems - and how to face them?

    The meaning of this sloka is:

    Whereas the books to be read are infinite, thetime available is limited and the obstacles are many.Therefore, we should absorb the essence of thebooks much like the swan described in the Puranas

    which seperates milk from water.This book is being published by Sri Ramakrishna

    Seva Samithi, Bapatla to bring the ideas of per-sonality development to the doorstep of Telugureaders. I shall be happy if this book succeeds ingiving some inspiration to the youth. I am thank-ful to Sri Amirapu Natarajan for translating thisbook into Telugu. I am much indebted to ReveredSwami Swatmanandaji Maharaj for writing a fore-

    word for this book. My special thanks are due tomy friends and well-wishers who encouraged meto write this book.

    I have collected a variety of flowers to make agarland. I do not claim that the flowers are all mine.

    (Swami Aksharatmananda) PresidentSri Ramakrishna Math

    Rajahmundry

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    8 Problems - and how to face them?

    Contents01 The difference between man and man 0902 What is Happiness? 1003 Happiness - A Habit 1204 Role of Attitude 1505 Circumstances 1906 Obstacle or Opportunity? 21

    07 Problems 2408 Be grateful to your problems 2609 What is our choice? 2910 Your attitude to problems 3011 If thinking and How thinking 3112 Your approach to problems 32

    13 Enthusiasm 3714 Advantages of cheerfulness 4015 Dont suffer, struggle 4116 Criticism 4917 How to cope with criticism 5218 Depression? Bounce up! 59

    19 Despair 6120 Dont Worry, Be Merry! 6421 Sense of humour 6822 Will-power 7123 How to develop will-power 7724 Conclusion 87

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    901 The difference between man and man

    1The difference between

    man and manDo you want happiness? - Pose this question

    to anyone and the answer you get would be a

    definite YES! But if you ask, Are you happy?his face will turn pale! There is a vast differencebetween what we wantand what we areandthat matters a lot in our lives.

    This difference is a measure of the satis-faction or dissatisfaction that is stored up in

    a person. One can use this satisfaction as aspur to go forward and achieve the goal hehas set for himself. Alternately, one may getbogged down by the dissatisfaction and wasteones life through constant worry.

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    10 Problems - and how to face them?

    2

    What is Happiness?Once a businessman, while walking along

    a beach, saw a fisherman lying down withhis net next to him. He was very happy andrelaxed and was humming a song. The

    businessman wondered how the fishermancould be so happy. He approached the fish-erman and had a conversation with him.

    Businessman: Havent you gone fishing today?Fisherman: Oh, yes! I went f ishing today,

    had a good ca t ch and so ld i t t oo . Af t e r f inishing all that, I am relaxing.Businessman: Then why dont you catch some

    more fish?Fisherman: Why should I fish more? What is

    the use?

    Businessman: Well, you will get more money.Fisherman: What would I do with that?Businessman: You can buy a boat yourself and

    get more fish.

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    1102 What is Happiness?

    Fisherman: And then?

    Businessman: You will get more money and youcan have a big house of your own.Fisherman: Then what?Businessman: You can have a TV, a refrigera-

    tor, a car, etc., etc by expanding your business.Fisherman: What after that?

    Businessman: You can live happily!Fisherman: Is it so? Then, what am I doing

    now? Am I not happy now? Do you mean to saythat I will be happy after getting all those things?I feel quite happy now anyway.

    The businessman was stunned speechless.Please try to think deeply about this story. Whatis the good in adding up things unnecessarily?Some people may require them, some may not.Happiness does not totally depend on externalthings. Happiness is a state of mind says a popu-

    lar adage.The intention behind telling you this story

    is neither to advocate stagnation nor to dis-courage progress. Progress is good; expan-

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    12 Problems - and how to face them?

    sion is necessary. But to what extent? There

    must be careful thought if it will bringhappiness to all those concerned.

    3

    Happiness - A HabitOnce there were two students. Both were

    preparing for examinations. One day, oneof them was relaxing after studying very hardfor some time. Standing in the moon lightand looking at the beauty of the full moon,he was enjoying the peaceful night. The other

    student asked, What are you doing, myfriend? The former answered, I amenjoying the moonlight. I will study a littlelater.

    The second student was shocked and feltthat the other student was wasting precious

    time. As he was tense with examinationfever, he could not enjoy the soothing moon-light and was not able to find happiness inthat peaceful night even for a moment. Heneither knows how to study nor does he

    know how to live.

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    1303 Happiness - A Habit

    This is a lesson for all. It is possible to do all

    the work and yet remain relaxed. To be able tocarry out your work in a responsible manneryou need not get tense.

    In a TV talk-show some people who claimedthemselves happy were being interviewed.When they were asked how they were able tolive happily, one old man replied, When I getup in the morning, I have two choices. Either tobe happy or to be unhappy. I just choose to behappy and that is all. Another happy man re-plied, I made it a habit to be happy.

    All this may look too simple and you may say,It is easier said than done! But everything ispossible by practice.It requires right atti-tude of mind and perseverance to achieve.

    Psychologists tell us that we can change ourattitudes by changing our physical actions. Forexample, if you make yourself smile, you ac-tually feel like smiling all the more. On the nega-tive side, if you frown bitterly, you feel likefrowning more and more. You feel superior

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    14 Problems - and how to face them?

    when you make yourself stand tall than when

    you slouch.Here is a method given by Dr. David T

    Schwartz. It is a very simple technique, but ithas tremendous power. Practice it! Every timesomeone asks you, How are you feeling to-day? respond by saying Just wonderful! orsimply say Fine.

    Say that you feel wonderful at every possibleopportunity and you will begin to feel won-derful and stronger too. It is not possible to bemelancholic when you say that you are feeling

    fine. Get known as a person who is alwayshappy and who always feels wonderful. It winsfriends!

    If you analyze yourself properly, you will findthat there is always something to be happyabout. Find out what it is. Bring that up intoyour mind now and then. It will refresh yourmind and remove any despondency that mighthave crept in inadvertently.

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    1504 Role of Attitude

    Let us see what Swami Vivekananda said in

    this matter. You will find at last that the easi-est way to make ourselves healthy is to see thatothers are healthy, and the easiest way to makeourselves happy is to see that others are happy.

    Therefore, as soon as you get up in the morn-ing, make a vow: I am going to make some-one happy today (in a proper way). Not justthat, also try to put it into practice by doingsome help to someone in need. Certainly it hassome elevating effect on your mind and person-ality.

    Now we can conclude that happiness in addi-tion to being a state of mind, also depends onthe attitude of the mind. So, right attitude is re-quired in the search for happiness.

    4

    Role of AttitudeThe attitude of a person towards life is a de-

    ciding factor in his life. How a man perceives

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    1704 Role of Attitude

    A weary traveller approached a wise man and

    inquired what kind of people dwelt in yondertown. What kind of people were those fromwhere you have come? the sage asked.Knaves and fools! scowled the traveller.Youll find the people here very much the

    same, the wise man said.Another stranger approached with the samequestion. He was asked the same question bythe wise man. Good, true and wise was thestrangers reply. Youll find the people herethe same, the wise man said.

    Do you think that the wise man was crazy?Why should he give different opinions aboutthe same village? The truth is that he knowsthe psychology of human beings. He under-stood that the first man is a hyper-critic in his

    attitude towards others. He cannot see goodin others. Whatever he sees, is evil only. So thewise man told him that the second village alsowill be as bad as the first one. But the second

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    1905 Circumstances

    5

    CircumstancesIt has become a habit for many people to

    blame the circumstances and external thingsfor their failures in life. Many students say,My teacher didnt teach me well! or My col-

    lege is not good enough! etc. Similar escap-ing excuses are given in career failures also.Blaming external things is easy.

    Then how is it that others who are in thesame circumstances are faring well? Theremust be something different in the individu-als concerned.James Allen says: One cannot alter external

    things to suit his passing whims and wishes, buthe can set aside his whims and wishes; He canso alter his attitude of mind towards externals

    that they will assume a different aspect.He cannot mould the actions of others towardshim, but he can rightly fashion his actions towardsthem.

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    20 Problems - and how to face them?

    He cannot break down the wall of circum-

    stances by which he is surrounded, but he canwisely adopt himself to it, or find a way out intoenlarged circumstances by extending his mentalhorizon.

    Things follow thoughts. Alter your thoughts,

    and things will receive a new adjustment. As withthe conduct of others, so is it with the externalthings - surroundings and circumstances. Theyin themselves are neither good nor bad, it is ourmental attitude and our state of mind that makes

    them so.The real want that hampers a mans progressis the want of right attitude of mind.

    When a man regards his circumstances as spursto his resources, when he sees that his so called

    draw-backs are the very steps up which he is tomount successfully to his achievement, then ne-cessity gives birth to intuition, and hindrancesare transformed into aids.

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    22 Problems - and how to face them?

    Once there was a football match between two

    teams. Many football fans and other interestedpeople were watching the game. A simpletonfrom a village, who did not know anythingabout the game was there as well. After watch-ing the game for sometime, he asked his friend,Why are these people fighting for a ball? Letthem come to me, I shall give them one balleach! If he gives them one ball each, therewont be any game!

    For one person, the ball is an obstacle; whereasfor the other the ball is an opportunity!

    For a wise man every obstacle is an opportunity;but for a fool ever y opportunity is an obstacle.

    If you want to go up the stairs, you have touse the steps. They help us to go up. But onseeing the steps, if you think that the steps areall so many obstacles, then you are lost.

    Remember this: A kite rises against the wind,but not with the wind.

    Suppose you undertake a project and find thatpeople are opposing you and saying all sorts

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    2306 Obstacle or Opportunity?

    of things against you. In the case of an average

    man the project will not take off at all. But thewise man - the practical man -will not bedaunted by all the ill-speech. He will use theseattacks as helps and go ahead with his work.Or in other words, abuses become blessingsfor this man.

    Let us see what Bhatrhari, the author ofNitisatakam, says in this respect.Aarabhyate na khalu vighna bhayena neechaihAarabhya vighna nihataa viramanti madhyaahaVighnai punah punah parihanya maanaaha

    Praarabdha muttamajanaah na parityajantiThe lowest category of people never under-take any task for the fear of obstacles. Mediocresstart and give up when they encounter problems.The best men will not give up the endeavoureven though over-powered by problems againand again

    Napoleon, who was a hero of many battlessaid, Victory belongs to the most persevering.

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    24 Problems - and how to face them?

    Carlyle, a great thinker also said, Every no-

    ble work is at first impossible. Know thy work anddo it and work at it like Hercules.So, you see, perseveranceis one of the quali-

    ties found in the lives of successful people. Ifyou are creative and practical, then nothing canblock your progress; instead, everything willturn into a building block for you. For a manwho finds opportunities in every situation thereare no problems at all! He knows the art oftackling problems with ease.

    7

    ProblemsWhat is a problem? It is a circumstance

    where you have to exercise your thinkingpower and find a solution to a tricky situa-tion.

    You cant do any work right away. It may bean unknown condition, an unknown job or anunknown person. Once you know how totackle the problem, the problem itself ceasesto exist. A problem is not an entity; nor a per-

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    2507 Problems

    manent phenomenon; it is only a phase that is

    ephemeral and passes away in time, tomorrowif not today.Take for example, eating! It is so easy for

    us; but for a baby it is a difficult task. Amother has to feed the baby first, then thebaby learns it by making a number of mis-

    takes until it becomes natural for the baby.Similarly any task such as typing or driving orlearning or anything else.And then, what happens once a problem is

    overcome? You gain experience. You learn

    something from it. You become experiencedor you become familiar with it so that youcan tackle it the next time you face it. On thesecond occasion you wont have that muchof fear or nervousness about it as you hadon the first occasion. And more over if you

    have benefited from that problem then youcan call it an opportunity!You might have faced the situation unwill-

    ingly not knowing the benefit of the situa-tion. But once it is over you may wonder how

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    26 Problems - and how to face them?

    you have actually been benefited by solvingthe problem or facing the situation boldly.

    Now think of the benefit you would havederived if you had considered the situation asan opportunity from the beginning itself ? Youcould have tackled the situation with willing-ness and enthusiasm and obtained more ben-

    efit than you have obtained by doing it un-willingly. Isnt it so?

    Now we come to the point. A monk said,When you see dif ficulties in ever y opportunity,

    you are a sad, unproductive person. When yousee an opportunity in every difficulty, then youare a successful and creative person.

    It all depends on how you look at a prob-lem. Your attitude is more important thanthe problem itself.

    8

    Be grateful to your problemsThere are some successful people who said,

    I am grateful to my problems. Whenever Isolve a problem, I become stronger andstronger than before. I grew on my problems.

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    28 Problems - and how to face them?

    Nothing happened! In fact, the butterfly

    spent the rest of its life crawling around witha withered body and shriveled wings. It couldnever fly.

    Nature created the tough cocoon in orderto make the butterfly struggle hard and gainenough strength so that it will have a well

    built body and would be able to fly well. Whatthe man, in his kindness and goodwill, didnot understand was that the restricting co-coon and the struggle required for the but-terfly to get through the tiny opening were

    Gods way of forcing the fluids from the bodyof the butterfly into its wings, so that it wouldbe ready for flight once it achieved its free-dom from the cocoon.

    Sometimes struggles are exactly what weneed in our life. If God allowed us to go

    through our life without any obstacles, itwould cripple us. We would not be as strongas we could have been.

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    2909 What is our choice?

    9

    What is our choice?Now you may ask, if problems are good and

    useful, then are we totally dependent on them?Or can we choose them? The answer is yesand no. You can choose the battle ground butnot the battle itself. You cant avoid the battle.But you can choose what the problem can dofor you.

    What can the problem do for you? You maynot be able to control every aspect of the prob-lem. But you can choose your response to it.

    This choice is all up to you. In other words,How are you going to react to it?When you control your reaction, you con-

    trol the effect of the problem on you. Yourreaction is the last word.

    If you react positively and not negatively toany problem in life, you can turn your scarsinto stars.

    Swami Atulananda, a foreign monk of theRamakrishna Math, said, Nothing has any

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    30 Problems - and how to face them?

    value. It is only our reaction that ascribes any

    value to something. If you dont react, and ac-cept blame or criticism - then you wont carrythat reaction with you. The object will have novalue. It cannot touch you.

    10

    Your attitude to problemsWe must understand that every problemholds positive possibilities. Every discovery thatwas made in this world was due to some prob-lem. The solution to that problem led to newdiscoveries that changed the world greatly. Ifeverybody had shrunk from those problems,humanity would have been at its starting pointeven today.

    The discovery of penicillin is one examplein this case. The scientist did not anticipate the

    growth of that new fungus in the experiment.Because of that fungus the experiments werebeing spoilt. The scientist without thinking thatit is a nuisance, tried to bring some good outof it. That resulted in the discovery of a life-

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    3111 'If' thinking and 'How' thinking

    saving drug for millions of people. If the scien-

    tist had simply ignored it and grumbled at theproblem, mankind would have lost a valuabledrug! This is what you call exploring the positivepossibility of a problem!

    11

    If thinking and How thinkingWhat type of a thinker are you? The If-thinkerbroods over his setbacks and problems. Onlyif I had done like this or that..... and so on andwastes a lot of time.

    The How-thinkerwastes no energy in the

    post-mortem of past mistakes. He immediatelystarts thinking - How to solve the problem?There must be a solution.

    If you want to improve the situation dosomething positive. Grumbling about your sur-

    roundings or the people around you will nothelp.If you look at life you can see nothing is fair to

    anybody. Big animals are swallowing the smallones. Strong men are ruling over the weak and

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    32 Problems - and how to face them?

    are oppressing them. Nature also is not fair to

    all. What about natural calamities? Millions andmillions of innocents are affected. Can we blamenature for such setbacks?

    By repeatedly saying, Life is not fair andshrinking away from problems, you end upbeing not fair to yourself.

    William James, a great thinker, says, the great-est discovery of our times is to know that hu-man beings can alter their lives by altering theirattitudes of mind.

    So please stop IFthinking and start HOW

    thinking. 12

    Your approach to problemsIf you can approach the problem with en-

    thusiasm then you face it with more energy and

    the encounter will be beneficial to you. I dontmean you will succeed every time. But surely, Ican say that you will be benefited even if youare defeated. What is my attitude?This isthe thing that must be the first and the fore-most in your mind.

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    3312 Your approach to problems

    First of all you must understand that prob-

    lems arise to make us but not to break us.Norman Vincent Peal says, A nervous personattacks the problem not in the right spirit which isto forget self and go ahead and do the job in a natu-ral manner. Instead, he works with tense effort -nervousness based largely on fear of personal fail-

    ure than on a humble desire to serve God.All our great people have one thing in com-

    mon. They get absorbed in the work they aredoing and forget themselves. They are so dedi-cated that they dont even go to take food. For

    them there is nothing problematic!There is a story of a scientist, who invitedhis friend for lunch. He made all the arrange-ments and then got immersed in his research.The friend came and found the scientist in hislab. He didnt want to disturb him. He waited

    for some time and then he finished his foodand because of hunger finished the share ofhis friends food also. But the scientist was stillbusy in his work. The friend silently left theplace.

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    34 Problems - and how to face them?

    After some time the scientist went to the

    dining table and found that the plates areempty. He thought, Oh, I have finished myfood long ago! and went back to his labora-tory to continue his research!Vincent Peal says further, Actually all shy

    people are egotistical, their thought being pain-

    fully self-centered. To be healed, the shy per-son must master self-forgetfulness.

    Swami Vivekanandas ideal of Karma Yogaalso says the same thing. The purpose ofNishkama Karma Yoga is to efface the ego.

    Swami Vivekananda says, It is the workerwho is attached to results that grumbles aboutthe nature of the duty which has fallen to hislot.

    It is not external things but our thoughtsabout them that bind us or set us free.

    Now you may ask, Is there a situation, wherethere is no problem at all, or a situation whereall the problems are solved? The same thingis contemplated in the Utopian and the so-called Welfare Societies. (Such a state can never

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    3512 Your approach to problems

    exist!) Schopenhauer said long ago, When men

    achieve security and welfare, since they havesolved all other problems, they become prob-lems to themselves.

    To give a more precise example, we cancite the rehabilitation projects undertaken bythe Ramakrishna Mission in many parts of

    India. In some projects the entire work wasdone by the mission and the beneficiarieswere also given some employment so thatthey could stand on their own feet. What wasthe result? To the surprise of all, the benefi-

    ciaries, not able to know what do with themoney they have earned, fell victim to badhabits like drinking, smoking etc.

    Later this methodology was changed. Theyhave been educated about the proper way ofliving and they were involved in the rehabili-

    tation work also. The results were far betterthis time.

    Now lets come back to our main topic. Atrouble, after all, is a situation that we are notready to tackle. When we make up our minds

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    36 Problems - and how to face them?

    to tackle the situation, it ceases to be a trouble.

    There is a proverb, Hammer shatters glass, butforges steel. What a trouble does to you de-pends on what stuff is inside you. Troublescome to make us and not to break us.

    Swami Ranganathananda said, Runningaway from problems will not be a solution,

    for problems will come chasing you.Swami Vivekananda gave a interesting illus-

    tration to this from his own life:Once when I was in Varanasi, I was passing

    through a place where there was a large tank

    of water on one side and a high wall on theother. It was in the grounds where there weremany monkeys. The monkeys of Varanasi arehuge brutes and are sometimes surly. They nowtook it into their heads not to allow me to passthrough their street, so they howled andshrieked and clutched at my feet as I passed.As they pressed closer, I began to run, but thefaster I ran, the faster came the monkeys andthey began to bite at me. It seemed impossibleto escape, but just then I met a stranger who

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    3713 Enthusiasm

    called out to me, Face the brutes! I turned

    and faced the monkeys, and they fell back andfinally fled. That is a lesson for all lifefacethe terrible, face it boldly. Like the monkeys,the hardships of life fall back when we ceaseto flee before them.Another thinker said, We do not lift our bur-

    den by ceasing to work, but by learning how towork.

    The foregoing analysis leads to one conclu-sion, that the successful person always has onequality, i.e., he is full of enthusiasm to face the

    problematic situation. Yes! Enthusiasm workswonders. Let us see what it can do for you.

    13

    EnthusiasmEnthusiasm is an attitude of mind which

    helps one to do any work without getting boredand without any strain. Did you ever observechildren when they are playing? How enthusi-astic they are! You can see so much of effer-vescence in them, that any onlooker will alsofeel energetic like them.

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    40 Problems - and how to face them?

    machine becomes your slave. Instead of this ma-

    chine being able to drag the soul down, it becomes itgreatest helpmate.Mahatma Gandhi also said, You are not com-

    pletely dressed, until your face wears a smile.So, we have to cultivate the habit of being

    cheerful and enthusiastic.

    14Advantages of Cheerfulness

    We must learn to be quiet and cheerful. Itnot only helps us, it helps others. Suppose aman loses his balance and if you come to

    him with a peaceful, quiet mind, you exert aquieting influence on that person and helphim to regain his equilibrium. You can alwaysset a standard. The way you do every thingcan become an example. When you do things

    casually - thinking Whatever! Its alright!- it means that you are acting thoughtlesslyand lack an order of spirit. The true art ofperforming action means doing things withpoise and calmness. Our thought can makeus careful or careless.

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    4115 Don't suffer, struggle

    How to achieve this? We can achieve it by

    putting animation into our daily work. Seek in-spiration in books, friends, art, music, traveletc. Interest is a measure of aliveness.

    Doing a work mechanically like a paid coolieis always damaging for the development of agood personality. A person who can turn his

    boring work into a work of very interestingnature never comes to failure. He is wantedeverywhere. This type of person never feelsthat he is suffering when doing some hard

    work or any thing like that. When you are

    undergoing a hardship, it is natural to feel thatyou are suffering. But how is it possible notto feel like that and to feel enthusiastic? Thiscan be achieved through constant endeavourand practice.

    15

    Dont Suffer, Struggle!There is an opinion that good people always

    suffer more and bad people avoid suffering bysome bad methods. First of all, the question iswho is good and who is bad? Generally we find

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    42 Problems - and how to face them?

    the people of religious temperament undergo-

    ing endless suffering. But those who are not re-ligious have a nice time in life. Whatever the casemay be, we must accept that bad people alsosuffer. There is no doubt about it. Who is suf-fering more and who is suffering less is a matterof individual opinion.

    What is good and what is bad is also a ques-tion that needs to be answered. There is noth-ing absolutely good or absolutely bad in thisworld. What is good for one person is not goodfor another person. For example, Ice cream

    may be good for a man in good health, but it isharmful for another person with fever and cold.Similarly, what is good in one season is notgood in the other season. This is known to all.

    Similarly suffering also differs from personto person. What is suffering? It is an unpleas-

    ant experience. Since, likes and dislikes varyfrom person to person, suffering also variesfrom person to person. What is suffering toone person is not suffering to another person.

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    4315 Don't suffer, struggle

    Sportsmen and gymnasts practice hours to-

    gether enduring great physical strain. Othersmay feel it to be excruciating but those ath-letes do all that happily. Meditation or spiritualpractice turns into a kind of suffering for anordinary worldly person but not for a spiritualaspirant.

    If you want to get something, you have topay the price for it. Everything has a price. Theprice need not be in terms of money always. Itcan be hard work - physical or intellectual; orsome effort or some struggle. To pass an ex-

    amination, how much struggle does a studentundergo? That is the price to be paid for theexamination. But for a person who is not in-terested in achieving anything in life, all these

    priceswill look like unnecessary troubles andhe may feel that these people who are strug-

    gling to achieve something are suffering un-necessarily. After all, he is greatly enjoying hislife, doing nothing!

    For the struggle to be meaningful, the knowl-edge of how to do a certain thing is necessary.

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    44 Problems - and how to face them?

    Suppose a saint and a sinner are playing a game

    such as chess. Who will win? The person whoknows how to play the game will win. If youargue that the saint must win and the sinnermust lose, then it is not correct. If the saintdoes not know how to play then he has to loosethe game. This has nothing to do with the saint-

    liness of the person. It is same with otherworldly affairs. If you dont know a thing, youhave to suffer. Whether you are good or bad isdifferent. Generally the so called good peoplelack many things required for a successful liv-

    ing. They happen to be impractical, and that iswhy bad things happen to them.Take the lives of great people who have

    achieved many things in their lives. Their livesare full of ups and downs. But the ordinarymen may not have so many ups and downs in

    their uneventful lives.Sampado mahataameva mahataameva cha aapadahVardhate ksheeyate chandraha natu taaraagana kvachit

    Prosperity is for great people and set-backsare also for great people only. (Because) Only

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    4515 Don't suffer, struggle

    the moon grows and decays but the stars do

    not.Great men encounter problems but they arenot scared. Their self-confidence and boldnessmake them endure the ups and downs in lifeand hence they become great. Swami

    Vivekananda said that the world history is the

    history of a few men who believed in themselves!But cowards and fools do not attain such

    greatness.There is a sloka about these impractical people.

    Sokasthaani sahasraani bhayasthaani sataani cha

    Divase divase moodham aavisanti na panditamA fool encounters thousands of occasions

    of unhappiness and hundreds of occasions offear every day, but not a wise man.And then, no man is happy or unhappy all

    through the day. There are happy moments ina day and unhappy moments also. The memoryof a happy event or a success in an issue issufficient for a person to keep himself happy.Do you think I am talking of imaginary happi-

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    46 Problems - and how to face them?

    ness? Then what about your unhappiness or wor-

    ries? They are also imaginations of your mind.Thinking that something bad will happen or hadhappened already, people are unhappy or wor-ried. The antidote for this wrong imagination isjust correct imagination!Yat dhyaayati tat bhavati!(Yat bhaavam tat bhavati)What you think that you become!If you think of success you will succeed; if

    you think of failure, you will fail. If you thinkof happiness you will be happy and if you

    worry all day, you will become a person full ofworries.

    From this analysis we arrive at the conclu-sion that all sufferings or bad things come tous with a purpose. We should learn from themand improve ourselves. Therefore the question,Why do bad things happen to us? must bechanged to, Where can they lead us?

    Each experience comes to us to teach us theway towards perfection, i.e., towards God. That

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    4715 Don't suffer, struggle

    is the goal. What happens to us is not impor-

    tant; what we do with what happens to us ismore important. In other words, how do webenefit with what happens to us is more im-portant. All great persons have experiencedblows and failures in their lives. But they didntkeep quiet. They utilized the failure and came

    up in life again.Thomas Alva Edison invented the Electric

    Bulb. He had to test a thousand filaments be-fore making a successful bulb. Now, whatwould you call that? One thousand failures or

    one thousand attempts towards success?In any work - secular or spiritual - unless you doit again and again and struggle while enduring allkinds of troubles, you will not be able to attainperfection.You will find that misery and happiness are

    equal factors in the formation of character.Good and evil have an equal share in mould-ing character, and in some cases misery is agreater teacher than happiness.

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    Swami Vivekananda said: In studying the

    great characters the world has produced, I daresay, in the vast majority of cases, it would befound that it was misery that taught more thanhappiness, it was poverty that taught more thanwealth, it was blows that brought out their in-ner fire more than praise.

    Saints repeatedly said that the path to God isfilled with difficulties. It is an obstacle race. Weshould not conclude that difficulties are ob-stacles. No! It is a way to God. Moreover, it isa way of God testing the devotee. Whether a

    devotee is truly devoted to God or not isknown by these tests. Lives of saints are goodexamples for this. Bhakta Mira, BhadrachalaRamadas etc. are well known examples. Aftera great struggle, they got the divine experience.And what happiness they had! It is like having

    a meal after being very hungry.It all depends on how you look at it. It is

    your attitude that is important. First of allchange the word Suffer into Struggle. Dont

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    as it is, try to be analytical. It will take the sting

    out of the remark. Read the following statementmade by a wise man, A creative man is onewho can lay a firm foundation with the bricksthat others throw at him.James Allen says: The injury that comes to

    you through others is the rebound of your owndeed, the reflex of your mental attitude.

    They are the instruments - You are the cause.Destiny is ripened deeds. Man cannot abro-

    gate the effects, but he can alter the causes.The harm which a man sees in the action of

    another towards him is not in the act itself, butin his attitude of mind towards it. The injuryand unhappiness are created by himself. The re-ality being that the deed can only injure the doerof it. But however, thinking that he himselfinjured, the man becomes agitated and unhappy.

    The righteous man has proved this by the factthat the same act has ceased to rouse in him anydisturbance. It (the act) belongs to a sphere whichhe has ceased to inhabit, to a region of conscious-ness with which he has no longer any affinity.

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    5116 Criticism

    He does not receive the act to himself.

    The thought o f in jur y to himsel f beingabsent.

    Other people can contribute to our depres-sion only if we let them. Words and actionsthat we interpret as attacks, often are in realitynot directed towards us at all. Even when theyare, we need to remember that in making suchan attack, people are revealing themselves.

    Swami Pavitrananda, a renowned monk ofRamakrishna Math, puts the same idea in thisway: You feel that or this person has hurt you.

    Why? Because, you are sensitive. If you wereinwardly strong, then you could ignore all thesethings. Just imagine! Permitting your happinessand peace of mind to depend on other mansbehaviour or word. Those are nothing more thanwords - weakness of another, ignorance of an-other. And a man of ignorance is an object of

    pity and not of anger.Release comes when we learn to bear what the

    other persons problems are, even when he ex-presses them by attacking us. Recognizing those

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    attacks as his problems frees us to deal with the

    actual situation and to help him.There are several ways we can improveour ability to cope with criticisms. Indeed,you can make criticism work for you. Hereshow you can respond to criticism withoutlosing your cool and making yourself and

    others miserable.17

    How to cope with criticism1. When you are criticized, pause for some

    time. Take a deep breath. When youre understress, you tend to breathe shallowly and rap-idly. If you inhale and exhale deeply, you notonly increase your sense of well-being, but yougain time before answering your critic.

    2. Is the criticism really directed at you? On

    many occasions, the comment may not be to-wards us at all. But we project ourselves andexpose our foolishness.

    In school class-rooms it is very common. Ifthe teacher scolds the students in an indirect

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    There was a young couple living in a village.

    Daily there were quarrels and arguments be-tween them during the meals time. As it wasthe custom, husband takes food first and wifetakes food afterwards. There was no way tofind a solution for their quarrels. At last thewife sought the help of a neighbour, an eld-

    erly women. She understood the problem andgave her a solution. She gave the lady a smallbottle with some medicine and asked her totake it for some days. The young lady askedthe old women, How to take it and when to

    take it? The elderly women told that This is apeculiar medicine. It should not be taken intothe stomach. Just keep it in the mouth for 20minutes and spit it after some time. The timeis before meals. So it is better to take it justbefore serving your husband.

    If you can guess the trend of this story,congratulations to you. Otherwise continuereading.

    The young lady followed the instructions care-fully. The next time when her husband started

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    that their criticism often reflects their own fears,

    its easier to remain calm. These people requireour sympathy. It will not help in anyway to in-dulge in exposing them.

    Holy Mother Sri Sarada Devi says, Doesany good ever happen to anyone if you enumeratehis faults? It only injures you. Forgiveness is

    Tapasya (austerity)!If you cant forgive, just forget.It is said, We may not be saintly enough to

    forgive, but we can forget at least.If this teaching is too difficult for you, here is

    one example. Your neighbour has a very goodflower garden and your garden is not so beauti-ful. Will it add to the beauty of your garden, ifyou take a knife and damage your neighboursgarden? Not in the least. Similarly, verbal attackon somebody will not do any help to yourself.

    6. Your critics could be right. All your criticswont be wrong all the time. If you hear a cer-tain criticism repeatedly, it might be true. And,as Dr. Allan Fromme, a marriage counselor,

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    5717 How to cope with criticism

    says, We are not adults if we cannot face a

    moment of truth with ourselves.Under these circumstances, accept thetruth and thank the critic. Try to improveyourselves. It is said, A match stick has ahead, but it does not have a brain. Therefore,it flares up immediately with little friction.

    We have brains. So, we should not flare up!Here is story on how to evaluate criticism. This

    is a story from the life of Abraham Lincoln.Once Lincoln issued orders transferring somearmy units. The war secretary Stanton knew that

    it is wrong. He not only refused to transfer thembut commented, Lincoln is a fool! WhenLincoln heard this, he didnt flare up. He said,If Stanton says that I a fool, then it may be true.I have never seen Stanton go wrong. Let me talkto him. He went to Stantons office and talked

    to him, realized his mistake and took back hisorders. Taking criticism in a positive spirit is oneof the great characters of Mr. Lincoln.

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    5918 Depression? Bounce up!

    when they hear criticisms against them. But

    a man of sound character will not get de-pressed like others. He knows how to takecriticism by its horns. Even if he is de-pressed, it is only for a short period. He willcome up soon. How is it possible?

    18

    Depression? Bounce up!Have you ever seen a ball jumping? Yes, what

    is the specialty in it? It teaches us a lesson.There is a Sanskrit verse:Paatitopi karaaghaataih utpatatyeva kandukaha

    Praayenahi suvrutteenam asthaayinyoh vipattayahA rubber ball rises when it is hit against the

    ground. In the same way, for good people, dan-gers (set-backs) are not permanent.

    Swami Vivekananda also said, True great-

    ness consists not in rising but in rising every timewe fall.In contrast, compare the fall of a clayball. What happens? It never rises. Success-ful people are like rubber balls who canbounce back after setbacks.

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    60 Problems - and how to face them?

    What happens to you is not important, but

    what you do with what happened to you ismore important.When you see some people, you wonder what

    keeps them always so energetic and active. Whenthese people work, it is a sight to see. They ar-range their work in such a way that it all looks

    so easy. It all depends on how you arrange yourwork. Suppose there are some books on yourtable. If they are all heaped together, can youpick any of them at your will? No. It will bevery difficult. But if you arrange them in some

    orderly fashion, you not only can find them easilybut there will be room enough for some morearticles. If such is the case with a few books, then,what to speak of multiple articles which youhandle daily.

    The same principle can be applied to time-managementtoo. You have 24 hours in a day.It is the same for everyone. But some peoplehave plenty of time to do many works, where assome find it always difficult to find time even tolook after themselves. Where is the problem? It

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    6119 Despair

    all depends on how you organize your day. In

    other words you have to organize yourselves,that means, you have to organize your thoughts,first.

    Swami Paramananda, a monk who was de-puted by Swami Vivekananda to America tocontinue his work, says, Be at peace with your-

    self. So long as we are at war with ourselves, we can-not better ourselves. The only way to improve oursteadiness and our devotion to our ideal is to so orderand organize our feelings and thoughts that they cannever overcome us.

    Abraham Lincoln said, It is difficult to make aman miserable while he feels he is worthy of himselfand claims kindred to the great God who made him.

    But when we feel unworthy, it is difficult notto feel miserable.

    19

    DespairThis despairing view of ones own self often

    stems from childhood when we really weresmaller, weaker and less skillful than thosearound us. Later, if we look closely, we may find

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    62 Problems - and how to face them?

    that we have not lived up to our own expecta-

    tions or our parents expectations of us. Orperhaps we have set our own standards too high.In either case, humility and laughter are thegreatest antidotes. Feelings of unworthiness canactually be laughed away by anyone who iscourageous enough to smile even a little at him-

    self.Now, with an understanding of the dynamics

    of depression, you should pray also for an in-sight into the emotion you may be burying orgiving into. Pray for an awareness of beingforgiven. Pray for a group or a friend to whomyou can turn to express your deepest emotions.And finally, remember that we are

    expected to think highly of ourselves. Properself-esteem is a million miles away from con-ceit and selfishness. It is giving ourselves

    the same reverence and respect we feel forall of Gods creation, and for the same reason:Because He made us and values us.

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    6319 Despair

    In many cases a failure can cause depression.We must understand that even great peopletasted failure many times in their lives!

    If you can sit down and think very clearlyabout failure, if you realize that you are aperson who always has choices, you will havemastered an invaluable lesson. Why do smart

    people fail? They can fail for many reasons.But failure is not the point - the best ofpeople experience that. It is learning fromthat failure, that is special. The distinguishingcharacteristic about really smart people? Theylearn.

    Bernard Shaw said, A life spent in makingmistakes is not only more honorable butmore useful than a life spent doing nothing.

    If success is only one step away, will thatbe adjudged a failure? No. Is one undaunted

    by failure? Does one possess a will andcourage that will never bend before diffi-culties? This is important.

    There is a sloka to this effect. (In fact, thereare slokas in sanskrit for every occasion in life.)

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    64 Problems - and how to face them?

    Kadarthitasyaapi cha dhairya vritte

    Buddhervinaaso nahi shankaneeyahaAthah kritasyaapi tanoona paadahaNa athah sikhaayaati kadaachidevaThe flame of fire never goes downwards even

    if it is held upside down; Similarly the man ofstrong character and will-power will never bedaunted nor even thwarted.We are fascinated to see and use the finished

    products of mans achievements like Television,Car, Computer etc. without knowing the pain-ful process by which these miracles came into

    being. We should know that virtually nothingcomes out right at the first attempt itself.

    20

    Dont Worry! Be Merry!One more aspect of depression is the habit

    of worrying. This is brooding over the past,without trying positively to improve the situa-tion. But if we analyze properly, most of ourworries are self created, or in other words, they

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    6520 Don't Worry, Be Merry!

    are dependant on our imagination. It is told in

    one English poem:All our joys are in our imaginationAll our sorrows are in our apprehensionThough life does not tally with his fantasies

    Man always worries about his futureHow true it is! By learning to think properly,

    this habit of worrying can be rectified. Thereare so many techniques to get rid of this habit.For example, try to recollect what you have wor-ried about a few days back. In most cases, youwont even remember what you were worrying

    about! If you can remember, it is very nice. Nowcompare the present state of that conditionwhich was worrying you. I can assure that, theproblem might have been over for good. Andyou will be thinking about some other prob-lems now. So, what is the use of worrying somuch about a situation which is not worthy ofremembrance?

    There is a sloka in this connection, which com-pares worry with a funeral pyre!

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    Chitaayascha chintaayaascha

    bindumaatra viseshatahaChitaa dahati nirjeevamchintaa dahati jeevataha

    The difference between worry (cinta) and fu-neral pyre (cita) in Sanskrit is one dot only i.e,the letter anusvara is the difference. Whereasfuneral pyre kills a man when he is without life,worry kills a man even while he is alive!

    You see, how true it is. Prolonged worry cancause ulcers, nervous tension, blood pressureand a host of many diseases. It is a well known

    fact that these diseases are all slow killers. Thisis the meaning implied by the above sloka.Here is a quote I saw somewhere: Today is

    the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday.It may not be true for certain types of wor-

    ries, which take a longer time to settle. Theyhave to be tackled systematically and analyti-cally. But most of our so called worries are thecreations of our own mental attitude and think-ing. Change the way you think, the worry nolonger exists!

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    earlier we accept and forget our mistakes, the

    better for us.In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, Fin-ish each day and be done with it. You havedone what you could. Some blunders and ab-surdities no doubt have crept in; forget them assoon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. Beginit well and with too high a spirit to be cumberedwith your old nonsense.We shall now discuss this sense of humour, a

    quality much needed in a world of much ten-sion and confusion.

    21Sense of Humour

    Take two joke-pills and call me in the morn-ing! That is the prescription of many physiciansand psychologists who believe you can laugh your

    way to health. Todays healers offer succinct ad-vice: Dont take your life too seriously; it is tem-porary.

    There are occasions, some situations, whereyou cannot decide what to tell or how to react

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    6921 Sence of humour

    to the situation. Under these circumstances,

    taking things in a humorous way can save thesituation.There is, however, a warning! Beware: Hu-

    mour may be dangerous to your illness! Theillness humour can immediately cure may bemental, but eventually it will heal most of your

    physical illnesses also. Because, now it is an es-tablished fact that mental health and physicalhealth are inter-connected. In many cases, it isthe mind that controls the body.

    For every event there is a lighter side. We fail

    to look at it. But if we can look at the lighterside, many problems wont arise at all. Thingswill be eased out. On many occasions, a wittyanswer would be better than a serious explana-tive answer.All of us know Abraham Lincoln. He was

    taller than the average American. Once some-body wanted to tease him. He asked Lincoln,Sir! What should be the correct length of theleg of a man? From waist to floor! answered

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    Lincoln. This silenced the questioner. This is one

    example of a great sense of humour.Swami Vivekananda also had to face similarsituations in America. There were many miscon-ceptions about India in that country due to thepropaganda of Christian Missionaries there. Hewas asked by someone, Why do mothers throw

    babies to crocodiles in your country? SwamiVivekananda answered, Because it is easier forthem to chew!You see, there can be no use arguing under

    such circumstances. Looking at the humor-

    ous side of the situation is very useful onmany such occasions.Aristotle noted that, A society which cannot

    laugh at itself cannot be said to be in good health.Benjamin Franklin, in Poor Richards Almanac,offered hilarious wisdom. An example:Marys

    mouth cost her nothing, for she never opens it but atthe expense of others. Throughout the ages, thesavants have known that a smile costs nothingbut gives much.

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    7122 Will-power

    For all the qualities discussed so far, one unique

    power is required as a back ground, as a bedrock. That is will-power. It is the power whichmakes you achieve what you want in life andhelps you to find a remedy for the tragedies youencounter in life. Without will-power the otherqualities cannot be developed. It is like the back-

    bone of a being.22

    Will-PowerFor all the stories of successes and failures in

    peoples lives, there are different reasons. But in

    every successful mans life one factor is inevitablycommon and that is will power. The amount ofsuccess a man achieves in his life can be gaugedby the amount of will-power he cultivated.

    Thus, the question How to develop will-

    power? becomes a very important questionin everybodys life. Proper training to developthis will-power should be a part and parcel ofour educational system right from the child-hood. Otherwise our education remains largely

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    irrelevant. If, unfortunately, the idea of cultivat-

    ing will-power has not been taught from ourchildhood, then we have to learn it now, what-ever may be our age or condition. Because with-out exercising will-power it is impossible to de-velop our personality and individuality. On theother side, if we have will-power, then even if

    we lose everything else, it is perfectly possibleto raise from a completely hopeless conditionand achieve success in our individual and sociallives. If a man has will-power then he will beable to make everything from scratch. If he lacks

    will-power then all his abilities will turn out tobe useless.By the above analysis we can conclude that

    the failure of our will-power is responsiblefor the tragedies which occur daily in ourlife. Many of us do not know what goodness,

    strength and greatness are innate in us andwe do not understand how they are tryingto manifest themselves. We only know aboutour weaknesses. So it is important to under-

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    7322 Will-power

    stand how not to let our will-power fail. To

    ensure that, the only way is to cultivate it!What is will-power? Swami Vivekanandateaches that the will is a combination of the mindand the atman. He says,This will is caused bycharacter and character is manufactured by Karmaor Work. As is the karma, so is the manifestationof will.

    Every man has some amount of will-power.There is no doubt about it. But it varies fromindividual to individual.We develop will-power by the way we work

    (i.e do our karma). Karma requires disciplineand discipline increases the will-power. Canan undisciplined person do any serious work?

    When we utter the word discipline, peoplefrown as if it is something unwanted. Be-cause generally discipline is imposed on

    someone by somebody else. It may be nec-essary when a person is too young to un-derstand the world. But as he grows he mustbe able to discipline himself. It is known asself-discipline.

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    Take for example the case of a mighty river; itflows with full vigour, occasionally causing dam-age to the human habitations along its bank. Ifthe power of the river is to be utilized for someuseful purpose, then there must be a dam andmachinery to convert the tamed power of theriver into electricity etc. This may look like con-

    trolling the freedom of the river; but see theadvantage of controlled use of the power ofthe river.

    Similarly, the power of the youth must be uti-lised by channelizing it by proper means. This isknown as discipline. Indisciplined youth-powerboth at individual and social levels is destruc-tive, whereas the disciplined youth-power isuseful in many ways.

    Swami Vivekananda was mainly concernedabout how young students can discipline their

    lives? He has addressed many a lecture to theyouth of India. He told, Take the whole re-sponsibility on your own shoulders and knowthat you are the creators of your own destiny.

    All the strength and succour you want is withinyourselves.

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    7522 Will-power

    Once you know the whole responsibility is on

    you, then you cannot behave irresponsibly, i.e.in an indisciplined way. A bus owner will not setfire to his own bus! But students do so because,they dont feel the responsibility. We see howpeople destroy the government property dur-ing strikes etc. People do not understand thatthose properties were created from the verytaxes which they themselves paid. If they un-derstand that, then they would not behave thus.

    Now, where does this discipline start? It startsat home. Parents must discipline their children

    first. It continues in schools and then colleges.When a man completes his education, thenwho is there to discipline him? He has to dis-cipline himself. It is known as self-discipline.In Ramayana, when Sita was kept in AshokaVana, who protected her?

    Rakshitaam svena seelenaShe was protected by her own character.The well established good character of a man

    which is cultivated from self-discipline will pro-tect him through his life.

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    76 Problems - and how to face them?

    Like any other quality, will-power also can be

    developed by proper methods and practice. Byfollowing simple exercises one can increase hiswill-power gradually. By loving what we oughtto do we can develop will-power.

    In our country, we can see women can enduremore shocks and blows than men. I have seen

    many examples, where a family bereavement hasthrown the father out of balance for manymonths, whereas the mother came round aftera few days of wailing and lamenting!What is the reason behind this phenomena?

    Generally it is the women-folk who undertakereligious fasting and observe vows meticulously.But men very rarely undergo these things. Thesepractices are the reasons behind the strength ofwomen. It requires some strength of mind tocontrol the passions and emotions. Ladies de-velop this by practising vratas (austerities)regularly. However, these can be practised byeverybody.

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    7723 How to develop will-power

    23

    How to develop will-powerFirst, start with simple exercises.1. Weekly, one day, skip one meal. Instead, take

    some substitute in the beginning. Later on, thissubstitute also should be stopped.

    2. Once in an week, practise silence for half aday. Spend the time in reading or meditating, ifyou are habituated to meditation. Avoid unnec-essary thinking too. Self-talk amounts to talking.Dont sleep away the time. It is not silence!

    I remember one incident. Once at a party, one

    multi-linguist who knew 14 languages, kept si-lent without making any comment or talking.All the others chit-chatted and gossiped to theirhearts content. At the end one mancomplimented: Our friend practised silence in

    14 languages!When it is so difficult for a manwho knows only one language to keep quiet,imagine what a feat it is to keep silent knowingso many languages.

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    3. Once a week skip taking tea or coffee if you

    have the habit. But dont resort to another badhabit to keep up this practice. For example, ifyou go to a cinema in order to skip a meal or topractise silence, it is a very bad idea!You can take the help of your friends who are

    interested in your welfare. Without their help it

    may be difficult to achieve the goal single-handedly. Beware! Not all arefriends. They maydisturb your vow!

    Moreover, eagerly await the day of practice!Prepare the mind from the day before, so that

    you will find it easy to control the mind. Andonce you have kept the vow complimentyourself with some treat. I am not joking! It willwork.

    Our mind is like a child, we have to cajoleit into obedience. The mind is like a whitecloth. The white cloth can take whatever col-our it is dipped in. Similarly mind also cantake suggestions and ideas. By giving goodand strong ideas we can nourish it well andmake it stronger.

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    8123 How to develop will-power

    game of ball with his friends. Suddenly the ball

    fell in to a deep hole in the ground. Every onetried to take the ball out by using sticks, ropesetc but failed. Suddenly Nehru got a brilliantidea. He brought a bucket full of water andpoured it in the hole. The ball came out floatingto the great joy of his friends!

    2. Do without the indispensableThere is nothing indispensable in this world.

    We are habituated to depend on something oron someone and think that the particular itemor person is indispensable. Swami Vivekananda

    said, The world is not waiting for you and me.Nature finds out its own replacement for eve-

    rything and everyone. It is all our imaginationthat we feel we are indispensable. First shatterthis cell of imagination and come out of it to

    see the reality. Not only that, trying to comeout of the confused thinking may open newavenues to explore and which in turn may en-rich our life.

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    3. Bear the unbearable,

    Tolerate the intolerableResponsibility is like a weight kept on our

    shoulder. We have to bear it.Kalidasa said in Sakuntalam,Raajyam svahasta dhrita dandamiva Aatapatram

    The kingdom is like an umbrella kept in onesown hand.An umbrella protects us from rain and sun.

    That is the benefit we get from it. But we haveto bear the weight to get the benefit. Similarlywith responsibilities also. You will get the ben-

    efit only when you bear the responsibility. Thosewho want to be free from the burden cannot beresponsible for anything. They are not wantedany where in the world.We have to tolerate the behaviour of many

    people when we are working in a group. Lead-ing a group is not trivial. Tolerance is the realtest of leadership.

    Swami Vivekananda says in one place, Can aleader be made, my brother? A leader is born.

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    8323 How to develop will-power

    Do you understand? And it is a very difficult

    task to take on the role of a leader. Onemust be a servant of servants, and must ac-commodate a thousand minds. There must notbe a shade of jealousy or selfishness, then youare a leader!

    If you want to achieve anything substantially,

    working in a group and team work is neces-sary and it requires leaders. But what aboutfollowers? If there is no follower, whom to lead?It is necessary for a follower to be a true fol-lower to accomplish the task. A follower who

    likes to follow his own course is no good in agroup. The group may be a family or an officeor a football team. It need not be a big organi-sation always.

    4. Keep on trying

    when the time is tryingMany people try for some time and then leaveit with depressed mind or with lame excusesfor their failures, or blame every one else andmaintain that they are alright. But it is not cor-

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    rect. Have you tried your utmost? There is a

    story narrated by Swami Vireswarananda, thetenth president of Ramakrishna Math &Ramakrishna Mission.

    Once there was a ship sailing in the high seas.A young boy accidentally fell into the sea fromthe deck. He knew swimming. So he was strug-

    gling to swim and kept himself afloat. But therewas no help. Though he got exhausted, he wastrying to swim and kept himself floating. At lastwhen he was about to sink, a life-boat was low-ered and the boy was saved. If the boy had not

    struggled, or given up his struggle, he wouldhave drowned. So you see, it is necessary to keepon struggling even if there is no sign of successin sight.

    One more thing necessary for developingwill-power is the positive outlook in life. It

    goes hand in hand with the most often quotedAtmaviswasa or Self-confidence of SwamiVivekananda. The man who has faith in him-self, has tremendous will-power already. Allnegative thoughts should be discarded daily

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    8523 How to develop will-power

    and the mind should be given newer and

    newer positive and encouraging ideas. Eachdisappointment is a filling station to renewyour energy.

    5. Now, here is a dose to try

    for the religious minded

    Sri J.P. Vasvani said, Do the best you can andthen surrender your problems to God; He is yoursenior partner!

    There is a story about taking the help of God.There was a little boy who was having diffi-

    culty lifting a heavy stone. His father came alongjust then and noting the boys failure, asked him,Are you using all your strength? Yes, I am!the boy exclaimed impatiently. No, you arenot, the father answered; I am right here wait-ing, and you havent asked me to help you!

    Sometimes when we are faced with a situationthat seems unsolvable or a burden too heavyfor us to carry, we might ask ourselves, are weusing all our strength? God too, is waiting tohelp us.

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    It is our folly to depend too much on our own

    strength. We must be able to take the help ofsomebody who can really help. Who said thatwe must do everything ourselves and withoutthe help of others? Are we not going to doctorfor treatment? But of course, whom to ask is aquestion of wisdom.

    Swami Vivekananda composed a sloka aboutthe strength felt by the followers of SriRamakrishna.

    Kurvastaaraka charvanamtribhuvanam utpaatayaamo balaat

    Kimbho na vijaanaasi asmaanramakrishna daasavayamWe can make the stars into powder, and we

    are strong enough to uproot the three worlds!Dont you know who we are? We are the serv-ants of Ramakrishna!

    Even in Bible there are sayings to this effect:If God be for me, who shall be against me? Ishall do everything through God who strengthensme.

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    8724 Conclusion

    24

    ConclusionSwami Vivekananda said, The road to theGood is the roughest and steepest in theunivers e . I t i s a wonder that so manysucceed, no wonder that so many fall. Char-acter has to be established through a thou-sand stumbles.

    By constantly striving to gain control over him-self, a man gains a knowledge of the subtle in-tricacies of his mind; and it is this divine knowl-edge which enables him to become established

    in calmness. Without this knowledge there canbe no abiding peace of mind, and those whoare carried away by tempestuous passions,cannot approach the holy place where calmnessreigns. The weak man is like one who, havingmounted a fiery steed allows it to run away andcarry him whither so ever it wills; the strong manis like one who, having mounted the steed,governs it with a masterly hand; and makes it

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