05 Newfoundland and Quebec Story

The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work2009 No. 3 www.dulwichcentre.com.au


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Narrative therapy and its fit with local cultures: Stories from Newfoundland and Quebec

Many community-minded families in Newfoundland seem to have difficulty with

traditional therapies that are interpretative or directive. In a search for a therapeutic

approach that might fit better with these clients’ world-views and complement their

traditional manner of self-healing, narrative therapy was found. This paper presents

one Newfoundland family’s story and the reasons for concluding that certain

narrative practices are very appropriate for community-minded families. The author’s

move to Montreal, Quebec, and her experiences there, have suggested that narrative

therapy using different narrative practices could also be a fit for families who have

lost or become detached from a community. A story of an immigrant Italian family

is provided.

Keywords: community, culture, narrative therapy

LINDA MOXLEY-HAEGERT

Linda Moxley-Haegert can be contacted by email: [email protected] or c/o the

Psychology Department, Montreal Children’s Hospital, McGill University, 2300 Tupper St.,

Montreal, Quebec, H3H 1P3, Canada.


56 The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work2009 No. 3 www.dulwichcentre.com.au

INTRODUCTION

The culture of any society includes many factors such as the history of the culture, the struggles and hardships of that culture, their religious devotion, as well as levels of education. These factors contribute to the values the society or culture embraces as well as how individuals in the particular culture perceive themselves (Valentine, 2001). In turn, I would argue, these cultural factors influence the way narrative ideas should be practiced in any context.

My experience as a therapist in Newfoundland, Canada, indicated that interpretative and directive forms of family therapy seemed to have a variable but often a low success rate (Moxley-Haegert & Campbell, 1996). Families in Newfoundland are community-minded, that is, they have traditionally used their community for help with family difficulties (Daly, 1998; Mellin, 2003). Also, Newfoundland has a strong tradition of oral story telling as a means of defining self, family, community, and relationships (Coles, 1989; Rowe, 1980). In Part I of this paper, I describe certain narrative therapy practices with one Newfoundland family. I then demonstrate how these practices (e.g. externalisation, outsider witnesses, reflecting team) provide a good fit for community-minded families who are closely available to their community and culture. A recent move to Montreal has brought to light other thoughts about narrative approaches and their potential usefulness. Many families in the large urban centre of Montreal appeared to be detached from their cultures of origin and thus seemed to require different narrative practices, for instance, re-membering conversations (White, 2007a), Tree of Life (Ncube & Denborough, 2006), and Team of Life (Denborough, 2008). In Part II, I illustrate these ideas by using a written narrative for a family with whom I worked in Quebec. I feel that my style of therapy has progressed and changed, perhaps with experience but also perhaps reflecting the different cultures and language use of the families I now see.

SUPPORT FOR NARRATIVE THERAPY

In the early 1990s, I began to use narrative therapy with families who consulted with me. The research literature suggests that family therapy is

effective (Gurman, Kniskern & Pinsof, 1986; Pinsof & Wynn, 1995). Most reports on narrative therapy have been single case studies (e.g. Epston, 1998; White, 1989). One study, however, suggested the effectiveness of using a therapeutic ‘map’ for the problem of childhood stealing (Seymour & Epston, 1989). Nichols & Jacques’ (1995) research suggested that their narrative therapy based community program reduced the lengths of stay in their residential facility when compared to other programs. Research from Adams-Westcott & Isenbart (1995) supported the idea that self-esteem, self-efficacy and post-traumatic stress were improved in women and men who participated in their narrative therapy groups. The positive reaction of one of the first families seen in Newfoundland using this approach has already been documented (Moxley-Haegert & Campbell, 1996).

PART I: NEWFOUNDLAND – COMMUNITY-MINDED FAMILIES

Newfoundland was initially settled in the 18th and 19th century by fishermen and their families. Communities were established based on their proximity to fishing grounds (Rowe, 1980). Often these communities could only be reached by sea and were separated from other communities by forests and by water. Houses were typically so close together that extended families were only a few

steps from one another. Communities were traditional in the sense that people felt they

belonged to a place and did not simply live there; there was a high degree of social equality, a sense

of community and of shared resources (Pocius, 1991). Social visiting between family members and

other neighbours was continuous (Coles, 1989). Personal and family difficulties or ‘troubles’, as they were often called, were worked out on a sister’s

back step, around the neighbour’s kitchen table, or down on the docks with other fishermen (Daly, 1998; Mellin, 2003). Pocius (1991) tells that these communities suffered great hardship, and perseverance was an important characteristic. A

strong tradition of oral storytelling of these hardships developed (Andersen, Crellin & O’Dwyer, 1998).



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Today, many of these isolated but closely-knit

communities have been abandoned for various

reasons and individuals have moved to larger towns

and cities (Coles, 1989; Iverson & Matthews,

1968). Consequently, families do not have sisters

one or two houses away, neighbours are not so close

emotionally and, with the closure of the cod fishery

in 1992 (Andersen, Crellin & O’Dwyer,1998),

fishermen are no longer down at the docks.

Thus, Newfoundlanders now consult the

professional therapists to ‘work out their troubles’.

Many have not been at ease with this development.

The reasons for this might be because the

circumstances of Newfoundland life fostered such

values as self-sufficiency (Chiaramente, 1970) and

resourcefulness (Coles, 1989) but also fostered

caution and distrust of new ways (Pocius, 1991). As

well, the traditional view and reaction to ‘mental

illness’ had not been very positive (Dinham, 1977).

Consulting a professional might be seen as having a

‘mental illness’.

Consulting a professional therapist, particularly

as a family, has represented a whole new ‘map’ for

problem solving for many Newfoundlanders (Davis,

1998). In the search for a good therapeutic fit for

Newfoundlanders in the early 1990s, I found a new

‘map’ for therapy, one that was developed in

Australia and New Zealand (White & Epston, 1990).

Both countries have many rural communities and,

perhaps, community-minded families. I wondered

whether this form of therapy might suit the families

of Newfoundland. I postulated that a therapy which

promotes community belonging as well as

empowerment might be highly appropriate for such

families. Using this ‘map’, a person can take charge

of his or her own change. Problems can be

externalised and thus are seen as separate from

people, and feelings of being blamed for the

problem might be reduced (Morgan, 2000). And

people re-story their lives and relationships.

One of the principle theories of narrative therapy

is that people’s realities are socially constructed

(Freedman & Combs, 1996; Thomas, 2002).

Consequently, narrative therapy is interested in

clients’ histories just as Newfoundlanders are

interested in their own history (Rowe, 1980). This

therapy makes use of the broader context that is

affecting people’s lives. A considerable proportion of

Newfoundlanders have Irish ancestry, (Manning,

1974; Pocius, 1991), and consequently many

Newfoundlanders are Roman Catholic (Rowe,

1980). Some think that historically the Roman

Catholic faith enhanced feelings of guilt and blame

(Gormaile, 2000). Possibly, this is one reason for

my observation that Newfoundlanders and

francophone Quebecers, who are also historically

Roman Catholic, easily feel guilt and personal

responsibility for personal and family difficulties.

Nevertheless, it seemed reasonable to think that a

therapy which had externalisation as one of the

central principles (White, 1988/1989; White &

Morgan, 2006) could reduce feelings of blame and

thus be more helpful than directive or interpretative

therapies.

History has created major upheavals for

Newfoundland families. For example, in the 1940s,

the Newfoundland government imposed

resettlement of whole communities into larger towns

(Iverson & Matthews, 1968) and the union of

Newfoundland into the confederation of Canada in

1949 came about with a very slim majority (which

some say was arranged) (Mellin, 2003). In the

1990s the cod moratorium, (closure of the entire

cod fishery on which much of the original

Newfoundland settlements were based), was

enforced by the federal government (Andersen et

al., 1998). As well, many Newfoundlanders felt

that, as a consequence of their union with Canada,

non-Newfoundlanders considered them to be the

most inferior people in North America (Sinclair,

1989). Jokes about Newfoundlanders, called Newfie

jokes (which often seem derogatory to

Newfoundlanders if not told by Newfoundlanders

themselves), only supported this thought and

feeling. Many Newfoundlanders do not like the term

Newfie to be applied either to jokes or to

themselves. The loss of their sense of belonging to a

particular community has persisted among many

Newfoundlanders (Pocius, 1991).

The narrative ‘map’ of therapy also introduced

the use of ‘outsider witnesses’ (White & Morgan,

2006). These witnesses may include important



people in a family’s life who are used as sources of help for professionals (in the form of reflecting teams). I believe this use of ‘outsider witnesses’ may enable those who traditionally turned to family and friends for help to feel more comfortable with therapy.

Culturally, Newfoundlanders are storytellers (Coles, 1989; Valentine, 2001). Consequently, this narrative ‘map’ of therapy approach seems to be particularly promising for these cultures. This therapeutic approach concentrates upon listening to a family’s story. The approach seems almost to be designed for such people who have had multiple disempowering experiences (Bannister, 1995) as the therapy creates a context for empowerment of individuals.

Michael White (1997) stated that people enter therapy when they are living a life that differs from the one they would like to live. He argued further that, even when a person or a family feels extremely marginalised and disempowered, there are positive ‘lived experiences’ outside the dominant story of marginalisation and disempowerment. White & Epston (1990) have developed ways to elicit and enrich the positive lived experiences. They suggested that bringing forth these alternate stories can help people and families move in a direction that corresponds to the way they want to live.

Narrative therapists work collaboratively and non-judgementally with families. Newfoundlanders have had, in the past, egalitarian beliefs (Chiamente, 1970; McCay, 1988). I speculated that Newfoundlanders might appreciate therapists who place themselves in a not-knowing stance and, with their questions, ‘map’ the events that constitute a family’s story. New meanings are then given to old themes. The richness of family stories helps access

new themes that have been clouded over by a ‘problem-saturated’ (White, 2004) view, a view that focuses predominantly on the negatives. An additional positive aspect of the therapy is that the therapeutic relationship is non-authoritarian. This

non-hierarchical approach to therapy seemed as if it might be a good ‘fit’ for Newfoundlanders as their history includes considerable abuse by authority

figures and many still distrust authority figures

today (Deas, 1988; Felt & Sinclair, 1995) and are suspicious of experts (Andersen et al., 1998).

Now, the use of narrative practices will be demonstrated by describing an example of therapy with a Newfoundland family.

A STORY OF THERAPY IN NEWFOUNDLAND

The family1, whose story will be told here, was a

so-called ‘come back from away’ family. This term is

used in Newfoundland to describe a family who had

gone to the mainland (a Newfoundland term for the

rest of Canada) in search of employment and then

returned after a considerable interval. ‘Coming back

from away’ is common in this province which, until

recently, had very high unemployment. This family

had received many other forms of therapy (group

therapy for children with anxiety disorders,

psychiatry relating to anxiety disorder, parental

groups, and medications) but had been unable to

make their wanted changes.

Erica was thirteen when we (the author as

primary therapist and Marjorie MacDiarmid as

reflecting consultant2 from behind a one-way mirror)

first met her and her mother.

The family had made several different moves

seeking employment on the mainland. Finally, two

years before returning to Newfoundland, the family

moved to a large Canadian city. Erica had coped

with the various moves to new towns and cities and

the moves from school to school until the final

move where she entered a large city school. Both

parents worked a long distance from her school and

she always arrived home before they did. She was

not happy with this but had coped adequately until

she heard reports about a rapist who had been seen

near her mother’s work. At this time, ‘worries’3

began to take over her life. At first the ‘worries’

made Erica phone her mother several times a day

from school. The children at school began to tease

her about these calls. Then (using Erica’s own

words), ‘The “worries” tricked me into thinking that

my mom and I would be safer if I stayed home from

school’. More than a year before we began seeing

Erica in therapy, she had stopped going to school

completely. Erica’s parents allowed her to stay at



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home for a while, and then the ‘worries’ began affecting them. Erica’s dad began yelling and her mom began crying.

The parents realised that they needed help and they had searched for and found services. Erica’s psychiatrist prescribed medications. She attended a group for children with ‘anxiety disorders’, which she liked. Her parents attended a parent group, which provided considerable support and education.

Teachers, administrators and the school psychologist of Erica’s school got involved around the ‘worries’. They had meetings, met with her parents, and devised plans. However, something about the way the meetings were conducted and plans formulated made Erica’s parents feel they were being blamed for her missing school. Erica’s dad became angrier and her mom became sadder. At first, Erica seemed quite happy as long as she did not go to school. She did her schoolwork at home and kept up with her classes. Later, she said, ‘Worries made me stay at home all the time unless daddy was with me’. Her dad began to feel that he should not take her out unless she went to school. Despite the efforts of many people, the ‘worries’ still talked Erica into thinking she was better off at home.

Erica’s parents were desperate. They decided that Erica’s mom would leave her job and move back to Newfoundland with her. Her dad would come later. Erica immediately went on the waiting list for the Janeway (the name used for The Children’s Hospital in St. John’s, Newfoundland) and we began to consult with Erica and her mom in February.

When we saw her, Erica had been registered in one of the schools in her neighbourhood since January but had attended only three days. She had recently transferred to an even smaller school and on her first day there had made one friend, Crystal. During our first session together, Erica brought her friend Crystal with her.

During this visit, ‘worries’ were named [Inquiry Category 1: Negotiating an experience-near naming of the problem (White, 2007a)], and the effects the ‘worries’ were having on Erica and her family were mapped on a flip chart [Inquiry Category 2: Mapping the effects of the problem’s activities

(White, 2007a)]. Erica’s responses were also mapped. I asked, ‘When worries are less around, what do you do to make them smaller?’ These days I would try to get an even closer naming of the problem, like ‘fear of mommy being harmed’ or other words Erica might have used. We did learn that Erica was not okay with the ‘worries’ [Inquiry Category 3: Evaluating the effects of the problem’s activities (White, 2007a)]. What I would do now is to seek more stories around the justification of the evaluation of the problem [Inquiry Category 4: Justifying the evaluation (White 2007a)].

There were exceptions (unique outcomes4) already beginning to happen (i.e. ‘I went visiting Crystal all by myself last night, she lives just down the road’). We made a list of the things that had helped Erica get out from under the influences of ‘worries’ and linked these to the exceptions. Erica thought Crystal might help her stay in school. We invited Crystal into the session to tell us why she wanted Erica to stay in school. She said, ‘I really like Erica; she will be my best friend. If she’s not there I won’t have a best friend’.5

At the next meeting, we heard that Erica had stayed in school for a complete week. Erica’s list of ideas and list of people who might make her more able to resist the ‘worries’, became longer. She added her dad to the list. ‘Daddy, is coming to visit. He doesn’t know I have been in school. He will be so proud I have started back.’ She also found that she had a new person to talk to about ‘worries’ in her Auntie Bea. Auntie Bea had suffered from ‘worries’ herself and had ideas that were helpful to Erica about how she became strong against ‘worries’.

Erica’s mom was feeling cautious about what might happen after the Spring holidays as Erica always had a hard time returning to school after a holiday even when ‘worries’ had not been so influential. I thought that I might write a letter (written narrative6) and asked if Erica thought it might help keep her from listening to the voice of ‘worries’. She liked the idea. ‘I’ll read it if I start listening to the voice of “worries’’.’

Erica returned to school after Easter and we began seeing each other less frequently. Just at the end of the school term I asked her if she wanted to



have a celebration party7 to complete her therapy.

We had a wonderful party but Erica teased us when

she first arrived by saying, ‘I’ve been sick with the

flu for a week and I haven’t returned to school since

then’. However, she couldn’t keep a straight face so

we knew it was a game.

WHAT THE FAMILY FOUND HELPFUL

Both Erica and her mom agreed that they had

not believed they could manage the ‘worries’

themselves. They had thought it was the psychiatrist

and the therapists who needed to cure the ‘anxiety

disorder’. Their belief about who could be in charge

of the ‘worries’ had changed. They began a new

story in their own minds (re-authoring) and felt that

the power of change belonged to them. Erica viewed

herself as stronger than she had felt originally. As

Erica’s view changed, she could do something

different; stay in school. They both felt that these

changes began directly after the first session. I have

found that ‘landscape of consciousness’ questions

(White, 2007a, pp.78-84), which allow people to

deconstruct such beliefs as who could ‘cure’ a

disorder, can help people change the ‘viewing’ of

the situation, which then changes the ‘doing’. The

questions asked in the first session around the

influence and effect of ‘worries’, and Erica’s own

ability to affect the ‘worries’, may have assisted

Erica to begin to realise that she did at times make

herself free from the influences of ‘worries’. Having

reflections and outsider witnesses to provide another

perspective in a non-threatening, non-judgemental

way could also have helped her move in the

direction she wanted to go.

Erica’s mom also thought that there was some

luck involved. The therapy had begun just as Erica

had changed schools and found a friend. Lambert’s

(1992) review showed that 40% of what works in

therapy is due to outside (client-related) factors.

Therapy also began just before Erica’s dad was

coming for a visit and Erica found a way to use her

dad’s visit to help reduce the influence of ‘worries’.

Erica happened to invite her new-found friend to

come with her to her first therapy session, and her

friend was invited to help Erica view some positives

about going to school. Getting and using the ideas

that Auntie Bea had used was also helpful.

Erica said that she liked her letter and would

read it if ‘worries’ began to grow again. Both Erica

and her mother also felt that involving all the

helpers in Erica’s life: Crystal, Auntie Bea, as well

as her parents, was helpful.

REFLECTIONS

Given that I (the author) was not born and

raised in Newfoundland, and that this paper is

exploring how narrative therapy ideas fit with

Newfoundland culture, I have asked two local

Newfoundland therapists (Cathy and Claudette) to

provide a reflection on the work described here.

Cathy

Cathy was born and raised in the city and is

called a ‘townie’ by Newfoundlanders. Cathy

practices narrative therapy.

I am not sure if I can make objective

comments about my own culture. I know

that when I worked with a rural caseload

on the mainland, I was struck by what I

thought were very isolated farms in the

rural area of that province. I felt that

they were more isolated than

Newfoundlanders were and realised

eventually that the farmers were

individually isolated while

Newfoundlanders were isolated as

communities, so their people had been

reliant on each other. I feel that my

parents were intent on solving problems

themselves, as there was not an

acceptance of outsider help (even if it

were available). And ‘my’ people never

wanted to let on to anyone that there

were any problems, but that was a class

thing rather than a cultural thing, I

think.



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Claudette

Claudette was born and raised in rural Newfoundland, from ‘around the bay’ in Newfoundland terms. Claudette practices narrative therapy and solution focussed therapy.

Author reflections

While I was born and raised in a region of rural Saskatchewan, in which community was essential for survival, I feel that I have been adopted by the Newfoundland culture and it is certain that I have adopted it as mine. It also seems relevant that my

Moxley ancestors stopped for several generations in Newfoundland during their migration from Ireland to Saskatchewan. I have used narrative practices since 1991.

My feelings, as expressed in the first part of this paper, are that many practices of narrative therapy are a good fit for any community-minded family living in close proximity to its community. This example of the ‘fit’ for Newfoundlanders might be able to be generalised to families in other similar cultural contexts.

PART II: QUEBEC – FAMILIES SEEKING COMMUNITY

A move to Montreal, Quebec, introduced me to many different cultures. The majority of the people in Montreal are ‘francophone’ – French speaking Catholic families who have been in Quebec for generations and are isolated from other cultures by their language. These families seem very community-minded. The culture of Quebec is a western culture that is rooted in the history of society of the French-speaking majority (Culture of Quebec, 2008). As of 2001, 79% of all Quebecers have French as their mother-tongue, and about 67% of Montreal’s 3.5 million people are francophone, and 95% of all residents of Montreal know and use French in their daily activities (Canada census, 2001). The history of these people includes success at establishing themselves in a harsh and inhospitable land, then using their ingenuity to tame the harsh land. Within traditional Quebec families, there are stories of how their forefathers and relatives of earlier generations successfully took on monumental tasks to deal with the challenges of the earlier times. When modern day descendants come together at family reunions in various parts of Quebec, what ultimately is acknowledged and celebrated is the cultural history of the family: ‘the task of preserving the cultural history of Quebec is the sacred task of the families, that is, the modern day descendants of the people who successfully made the harsh environment of an untamed Quebec into a home’ (Valentine, 2001). This is often done through stories. In some ways, francophone culture

Newfoundlanders like and feel comfortable telling a story that could show positives and strengths so this therapy might be a fit for them. We have been disempowered by hierarchical power-based structures like church, government and even rich merchants, so I feel we were taught not to question people in positions of power. That increases the value of respect for an authority figure. People in power often wrongly informed Newfoundlanders that something unfamiliar was best for them. This therapy lets them decide. We have had to be big on hope and we pride ourselves on figuring things out for ourselves. Thus, narrative therapy again ‘fits’ for Newfoundland families. Family therapy seems appropriate for Newfoundlanders because family is very strong in Newfoundland. The strength comes from just being home (in Newfoundland).

The privacy of Newfoundlanders in terms of keeping problems to self or in family could be well served through the use of re-membering questions (White, 2007), another part of narrative therapy, which includes questions about an important person in the life of the person consulting, without the person having to be there.



might be considered very similar to the Newfoundland culture. Both cultures are community-minded, independent, and perseverant, and both cultures use storytelling to preserve their (what they consider to be) unique cultures within Canada. What’s more, both provinces had referendums regarding being a part of Canada and both populations voted by a very small majority to be part of Canada: Newfoundland in 1949; Quebec, in 1995 (Baker, 1987, 1995; Quebec referendum, 2008). Perhaps the argument proposed in Part I of this paper, that certain practices of narrative therapy are a good fit for islander Newfoundlanders, is also relevant for the ‘francophone’ population of Montreal.

There are, however, many other small cultural communities in Montreal that seem ‘displaced’. Those living within these communities sometimes have very few family members nearby and very few supports. Many of the families in these smaller communities are ‘anglophone’ (English first language speakers). Some anglophones have lived for generations in Quebec or Montreal but have many relatives who have moved to English-speaking Canada. About 15% of the population in Montreal (Canada census, 2001) are ‘allophones’ – people who speak other than French or English as a first language. These are immigrants, or first or second generation Canadians, and comprise about 630,000 people in Montreal (Canada census, 2001). I argue that, for these people (both the anglophones without family near-by and the allophones), narrative therapy is also a good fit but for different reasons than those outlined in Part I, and as practitioners we may be required to use different narrative practices.

In the big city, I feel there is often a need to

bring the community back to the family. Here in Montreal, I feel that I have had a new challenge that is to consider how to use the many appropriate narrative ideas (i.e. re-membering conversations8, collective narrative practices such as The Tree of Life9 and The Team of Life10, as well as the double-storying of re-authoring conversations11) to help

bring community back to families who seemed to have lost it.

My work in Montreal is with the Oncology and Palliative Care teams at the Montreal Children’s Hospital. The families with whom I work come from all walks of life and from multiple cultures. Most have never sought therapy of any kind in the past. They ask for help as a result of the circumstances of their child’s illness. I understand their cultures much less well than I understand the Newfoundland culture, but I have worked very hard to learn about them and adapt my way of working accordingly.

I have chosen to describe work with an Italian family in the next section of this paper. Italian Canadians represent about 4% of the Quebec population and most live in Montreal. They fit well in Montreal because they too are from a Roman Catholic background, speak a Latin language so can easily learn French, and have similar values in relation to honouring family (About Italian Canadians, 2008). Italian immigrants are often as devoted to their families as they are to their faith. According to Di Stasi (1991), Italian families commonly have very close family ties which include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. The closeness of the Italian family was traditionally reflected in the huge family gatherings on birthdays and holidays (Di Stasi, 1991). The following example of narrative therapy with an Italian family illustrates a number of re-membering conversations. Re-membering conversations (White, 2007a) are based on the idea that identity is founded upon an ‘association of life’ involving memberships of important figures of a person’s past, present, and possible future.

A STORY OF THERAPY IN MONTREAL

In order to better understand the idea of working to bring a sense of community back to a family, I have included below a written narrative. I wrote this narrative to a newly immigrated Italian family after the funeral of their twenty-one-month-old boy, Frank. I began having conversations with this family from the moment of Frank’s diagnosis, which was thirteen months before his death. The family felt isolated and lonely during the difficult process concerning the illness and death of their child. I felt that the use of re-membering



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conversations could more richly story the relationships that the parents had with certain family members, and I hoped that this ‘upgrading of these memberships’(White, 2007a) would be helpful to the parents in their journey through these difficult times.

The family had not asked for the following written narrative but since they lived far from the hospital, I felt it was not likely that I would have a close follow-up with them. I thought that the ideas they had discussed might be important to remember as they negotiated this new part of their journey in life. I wrote the following letter using their way of speaking, which is different from my usual way of speaking.

Dear Antonio, Claudia, Luigi and Frank;I just came from seeing Frank at the

wake and thought I would like to write you all a letter to let you know some of my thoughts about our conversations together. We first met shortly after Frank was diagnosed with cancer 13 months ago and together we shared many conversations with the most recent one taking place today.

First, Frank, I would like to thank you for letting me into your life. You were always so welcoming to me and I so much appreciated the kisses you would blow me when I left the room. I got to know your spirit and your spunk. I am wondering how you are going to continue to show us your wonderful little personality. I will be watching curiously for you to let me know this. Today, I blew you a kiss and I felt that you caught it. Maybe you will take it along with all the other many, many kisses up to that star that you have become [Frank’s parents had decided that in order to explain Frank’s death to his older brother, Luigi, they would say he had become a star]. I wonder how you learned in such a short time so much about love. I was thinking that it might have been because you were surrounded with so much love. Your parents stayed with you so much when you had to spend half of your life or more in hospital. You also had your brother visiting you all the

time and you had so many visits from people who could not actually be a physical presence in the room but were there anyway. I was feeling that you are so lucky to have come from a close Italian family who was so able to show you love and then you could give it to others as well. Frank, everyone in the hospital fell in love with you; maybe it was so easy because there was so much love around.

Luigi, I only met you three times. I remember one time especially when you came in and you had just bought a toy at the store. It was a wiggly worm inside a container, or something like that. As soon as Frank saw it, he wanted it and you gave it to him. How did you learn to share like that with your little brother? I was wondering what you are going to share with him in the future now that he is a star. Perhaps you will tell him of your life, your play with your cousin who is soon to arrive from Italy; maybe as you get older you might even share with him some of the problems that come up. I am wondering how he is going to respond. What advice do you think he will give you?

Luigi, I am hoping that you are going to get to wear your new shoes at the beach someday soon. You had planned to go with your parents and then Frank got sicker. Your mom said that you did not even ask why you had not gone. Did you understand? I know there were times when it was hard to understand. When Frank was first sick you seemed a bit mad at your mom and then she helped by working really hard to spend good times with you. Did you like that? What did the two of you do together? Another time you got so mad at your dad because you wanted him to stay with you and he needed to go and see Frank. Your babysitter helped you out then by saying that she understood why you were upset. She told you that everyone was upset because, instead of getting better after all



the treatment, Frank got sicker. You are so young to learn about life and the not-life in this world. You are learning about the life of a star that is now your brother. I am wondering how you will keep your brother close to you. Will it be in your memories, will it be in those lovely pictures of you all that I saw today, or will it be another way?

Antonio and Claudia, when I drove to and from St Leonard today, I was reminded of all those long days you had with Frank in the hospital and how one of you always took the long drive home to see Luigi. This seemed to be because you were always thinking of both your children and wanted what was best for them both. You split yourselves in many ways over these many months. There were ups and downs, but during the more recent weeks I was noticing calmness in your manner and some peace. Was I right? Where were you able to find this? What helped you? Where did this come from? How did you find it during all the sadness?

Antonio, we talked about how you felt that this process of dealing with Frank’s illness and death was so much more difficult because you did not have your whole village to support you and your family, like your grandfather had had when he died. You remembered that your grandfather had supported everyone else as much as they had supported him and each other. So, we decided that maybe we could use your grandfather’s help since he had gone through it all. We had conversations about what advice your grandfather would have given to you if he had been able to be in the room with us. After that conversation, you said he had been in the room, as had your grandmother. When I asked how you could bring them even more into the room with you, you replied ‘Spaghetti’. You said that while you could no longer eat your grandmother’s spaghetti, which you know she would have brought with her if she could have, you said that you could imagine

the fresh oregano that would have been in it, and that this gave you comfort. In fact, you decided that when you picked up Luigi you would go to the Jean Talon market and search for fresh oregano, even though it was only March. Have you been eating any fresh oregano lately?

Claudia, do you remember when we brought [through a re-membering conversation] your whole village from Italy into Frank’s hospital room? This was on the day that you had received the Mother Mary medallion that had been blessed and prayed over by your village church members and priest in Italy. You told me at first you thought the prayers were to save Frank’s life but later you realised they were to save your life so you could stay and be a good mother to Luigi. You knew that the voices of those in the village were also there to help Frank become the star who would always be there watching over you, giving you comfort and some pretty neat hugs and snuggles. What has Frank been giving you lately?

You both told Jacqui, the social worker, that you were all talked out by the end, and I know you asked me not to come over the last two weeks. I could understand that, because you did talk a lot and we had a long relationship. I was glad you could tell me what you wanted. Is there anything more to say now? I want you to know that I am here for any of you should you need to talk in the future. If you have concerns about Luigi, you can also call about this.

I am thinking of you and I am also wondering how you are now going to define your new relationship with Frank. Antonio, you said when this was all over you wanted to make a new beginning with your family. You had some ideas about this. You wanted to live more for today instead of living for the future. You wanted to be able to do things for your family right when you think about it. How are you going to be able to do this?



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WHAT THE FAMILY FOUND HELPFUL

I talked with the family by telephone several times since Frank died. I heard that they really loved the letter. They had not asked for it but I felt their beautiful conversations needed to be documented and hoped it could be helpful to them. I called them again on Frank’s birthday, and when I decided I would like to include their letter in this paper, and again when it was a year after Frank’s

death. Claudia called me a couple of times when she had some questions about Luigi’s behaviours and when Luigi had questions relating to Frank’s death.

I will include here an excerpt from another letter I sent to Antonio following one of our conversations.

REFLECTIONS

Since I was not born or raised in Quebec, I

asked a Quebec therapist (Karine) to reflect on this

paper. As I am not an immigrant to Canada, I also

asked an immigrant therapist from Spain (Charo) to

offer her reflections.

Claudia, do you have ideas of how to make some new beginnings? You talked about how to have the experience of having Frank be turned into something positive for your family. What will it be? You talked of a miracle, and in some ways I felt he gave you some of that miracle by lying on one or the other of you every minute from the time his relapse was diagnosed. He did it by slapping your face in love, moving your chin and giving kisses, and bossing you around. What other ways did he show that miracle? Is he showing any now?

I wanted to tell you how much I loved the flowers and how so many of the arrangements seemed to be full of love and joy: his name in flowers, his French fries, and even some toys were arranged in flowers. What a great idea! He looked so beautiful and at peace and I was really glad to see him and to see how well you both were holding up under what must have been a lot of strain. I also want to say that I enjoyed meeting both of your sets of parents, grandparents and village members in conversation; I felt that I became almost a part of that lovely Italian family.12

I would like to thank you for allowing me to share with you some of the most difficult moments of your life and to say again that I am here for you should you feel that it could be helpful.

Yours truly, Linda.

Thank you so much for our last conversation Antonio, when you told me you had recently taken your grandfather’s advice again and began ‘living for today’. So you have been continuing to have conversations with your grandfather! What other good advice has he had for you? You had spent so much time worrying over money and responsibilities that you had been forgetting to have fun. You might not really have been able to afford it but you took the family to Cuba and started making concrete plans to build a house on that piece of land you had bought. We talked about what it might mean to you all to move into an Italian community in Montreal even if it was not your immediate relatives living there. You told me that it had been helpful to have the conversations which ‘brought’ your Italian family here to love and support you during these difficult times. You talked to me about the importance of the conversations regarding your grandparents and your grandfather’s advice and your grandmother’s spaghetti with fresh oregano (even if you couldn’t eat hers, you could reproduce hers). You said the letter was a useful reminder of your values regarding community and that it helped you with your courage to build your house and move to an Italian region of Montreal.



Karine

Karine is a psychologist born in Quebec City in a francophone family who came to Montreal six years ago. She uses ideas coming from the narrative approach in therapy.

Charo

Charo immigrated from Spain and moved to Montreal twenty-nine years ago. She does not use narrative approaches in her practice but practices other forms of therapy.

I think that it might be beneficial to bring back a sense of community when working with families who are isolated from their culture of origin and/or family, as in the case of some immigrants. I had the chance of working with families who immigrated to Montreal and for some of these the feeling of isolation was quite strong. In addition to having concerns about their child’s development or health, these families had to trust professionals coming from a different culture and sometimes not speaking their language in order to get help for their child. Trust is an essential element in the building of a therapeutic alliance with a client. By integrating ideas related to important figures or individuals coming from the community of origin of the client, I think the narrative approach may help the person to feel understood and contribute to build the trust. Furthermore, re-membering conversations, by helping the person realising how other individuals shaped their lives or their perception of themselves, could decrease the feeling of isolation that some people living far from their family/community may experience. I think that telling a story in which certain significant family members are integrated, might help clients to feel supported despite the fact that they are somewhat isolated.

Even when some members of the family are present in the same city, it is sometimes difficult for some individuals to talk about their difficulties with other members of their community because they are ashamed or feel guilty, and this may also foster a feeling of loneliness.

The value of self-reliance and the ability to solve your problem by yourself is valued in many cultures I worked with. The feeling of shame about requesting the help of a professional due to personal or familial difficulties was quite present in the clients that I meet. Asking for psychological support is sometimes perceived as a sign of weakness or as an indication of a serious mental health problem. I think that the use of narrative ideas such as re-membering conversations or the Tree of Life might contribute to decreasing the feeling of shame that some persons might experience, because it helps them realising how their identity was and is influenced by others.

Furthermore, because the therapist is interested in the client’s story instead of taking the position of an expert, I think that the narrative approach helps individuals who consult us to feel less as if they failed or as if they necessarily have a serious mental illness. The feeling of guilt is also often diminished within the narrative approach by externalising the problem. This is a technique that I use with many clients and find it very empowering: it gives clients energy to fight against an external entity instead of fighting against a part of themselves.

I read this paper with a lot of thought. I immigrated for adventure, to escape from the control of our society. Storytelling is very much a part of my culture. The exploits of ancestors were told to provide



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Author’s reflections

I am now a ‘displaced’ person, far from my community of support, working in a different language, so a kinship was felt with those who are far removed from their original culture and community of support. I feel that, if I were having difficulties, re-membering conversations could be

very helpful for me. I find that I identify, perhaps too closely, with such displaced families as with the family represented in Part II.

DISCUSSION

In my reading about ‘what works in therapy’, there is increased support for the idea that therapy is a matter of client self-healing (Tallman & Bohart, 1999). Hubble, Duncan & Miller (1999) suggest that recent narrative and constructivist perspectives move in this direction. Hubble et al. (1999) state that it is important to select a model that will fit with the clients’ worldviews and can be tailored to complement the clients’ expectations of treatment. In doing this work, it was my intention to see whether the families who consulted me felt that narrative therapy was a good fit for them.

I was under the impression that the narrative approach might well be tailored to the worldviews of the independent, yet community-minded Newfoundlanders, and later with francophone Quebecers.

Many families I worked with have told me that narrative therapy suited them (Moxley-Haegert & Campbell, 1996). One reason for this fit might be that this therapy takes into account and uses the clients’ environment and existing support network. As well, narrative therapy builds upon the spontaneous changes clients experience while in therapy, through the process of ‘re-authoring’ conversations.

Historically, Newfoundlanders and francophone Quebecers are storytellers (Rowe, 1980; Valentine, 2001). In narrative therapy, questions are oriented to increase a sense of hope, expectancy, and personal control. These questions and consequent changes in thinking are suitable for a disempowered people. Hubble et al. (1999) suggest that these contribute to positive change as a result of a person or family entering therapy. The collaborative, non-authoritative and egalitarian therapeutic stance of the narrative approach seems to have promoted many positive changes in those community-minded families with community at their disposal. At the same time, many families in Montreal either are, or

seem to be, displaced or estranged or detached for

a model, a family reputation, to keep up with all your life. Storytelling contains the family. It’s the way your culture does not abandon you. The stories teach you how to cope, how to approach life. They give you a guideline.

I think this sort of therapy would help to give me the strength of other people. It would remind me that I am a part of them and that I am not alone. It would remind me who is around me. It would be about remembering the pride. I like to tell the story of my family to honour it. I built a house and, when searching for a name, I gave it my grandmother’s name.

For me, this form of therapy would be helpful, I am a link in a chain. Much as I adore this country, I still think my story is from Spain. Anywhere else in the world except Spain, I would say I am Canadian but, when I reflect, I feel I am storyless in this country. My story is from Spain. Certain emotional terms are very language related. ‘I love you’ is an English phrase, but these are not my words, my emotion is not reflected in saying those words in English. Certain Spanish songs are so powerful for me but in English I have not found such power. All my pets have Spanish names. My dreams are in Spanish. I dreamt that my mother’s sister was getting mad at a man who told me not to walk on his land. She said, ‘Charo can walk where she wants, this land belongs to her’. I woke up feeling that I am never alone. I always have those people with me.



various reasons from their community. The second part of this paper has explored how different narrative approaches can be used with families who are seeking community.

In the search for a therapy that fits better with the clients’ world-view and complimented their traditional manner of self-healing, narrative therapy was found. Narrative therapy may be a closer approximation to the traditional way that many families have solved ‘troubles’ in the past in both Newfoundland and francophone Quebec. Thus, narrative therapy may be the therapy of choice for rural or culturally community-minded families living in close proximity to their community. At the same time, I argue, that narrative therapy has many important ideas which can be used to bring the community back to families who have lost their sense of community because of immigration, estrangement, or for other reasons.

EPILOGUE

I like to pay attention to how experiences have shaped my life. I learn from the families I work with, the cultures I came from and am currently living in. I feel that the experience of writing this paper has consolidated my knowledge of narrative practices and I am grateful for having experienced the process. The first part of this paper, in a very different form from the current manuscript, was started several years ago. As I was making corrections for a review from a journal, I received the news of my brother’s tragic death in a plane crash. It took several years before I could look at it again. This current work has been a healing process. It is interesting that now I work in palliative care helping others manage the death of their loved ones.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I would like to express my great appreciation to Jim Duvall whose vision was a big help in the early formulation of ideas for this paper, and to David Haegert who supported and edited. I would also like to thank the outsider witnesses in the therapy in Newfoundland: Auntie Bea, dad, Crystal, and Marjory MacDiarmid. I would also like to

acknowledge Claudette Morris, Cathy Sinclair, Karine Gauthier, and Maria (Charo) Sufrategui for their reflections. This paper is dedicated to Michael White whose narrative ideas contributed so much to me, to Newfoundland therapists, and thus to many Newfoundlanders.

NOTES1. The family has given permission for their story to be

told. However, names have been changed to protect the family’s identity and maintain confidentiality.

2. For more information on reflections and outsider witness practices, refer to Russell & Carey (2000) and Michael White (2007a).

3. The term ‘worries’ was externalised for the family according to the ideas of narrative therapy. The problem is thus thought of as outside the person and it becomes the problem rather than the person being the problem. In further discussion of this family, ‘worries’ will be talked about in an externalising manner. This term was Erica’s and following White & Epston’s (1990) original ideas of using the person’s own language, I adopted it. (White, 2007a,b).

4. For more information on unique outcomes, refer to Chapter 1 in White (2007a).

5. These days I would have questioned Crystal in a different way, having her serve as an outsider witness. I would ask her to listen to the conversation with Erica and ask her the four outsider-witness questions described by Michael White (2007a,b). I would ask her to please speak about what she was drawn to; to speak about what was triggered in her mind (trying to have her describe an image); asking her what this image or noticing touched on for her (presenting resonance or embodiment); and asking her how she was moved by the witnessing (discussing transport or katharsis, using the classical understanding of katharsis).

6. See Chapter 10 in What is narrative therapy? by Alice Morgan (2000) for more ideas about therapeutic documentation.

7. For more ideas about rituals and celebrations, please see Chapter 12 of What is narrative therapy? by Alice Morgan (2000), and Chapter 4 in Definitional Ceremonies by Michael White (2007a).

8. Please refer to What is narrative therapy? by Alice Morgan (2000), and Chapters 3 and 4 of Maps of narrative practice by Michael White (2007a).

9. The Tree of Life is a collective narrative approach to responding to vulnerable children that was developed by Ncazelo Ncube and David Denborough (Ncube, 2006; Denborough, 2008).

10. See Denborough (2008).

11. For ideas about re-authoring conversations, refer to Chapter 2 of Maps of narrative practice by Michael White (2007a).



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12. This comment might have been too personal, but this was such a warm family. I felt a part of their process. Because I met them shortly after leaving Newfoundland and the closeness I had had there, we had talked about my ability to understand their feeling of loss of family and community in relationship to my own experience.

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Documents

05 Newfoundland and Quebec Story