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Sharing Sensitive News with Parents

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Agenda

• Introduction• Why sharing news is difficult for parents and

ECEs• How you tell makes a difference• Strategies for Sharing News• Planning ahead• Sharing the information• Wrap-up

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Intro Activity

4 things to remember when sharing news with parents

T ____________

E ____________

L ____________

L ____________

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Think back to a time when you received “sensitive” news.

What do you remember?

How did you feel?

What did you do?

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How do you think parents feel upon hearing our news?

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Emotional reactions

• Pain & grief

• Inadequacy

• Anger

• Guilt

• Fear/vulnerability

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Why it’s difficult for parents to accept news

• Emotional Reactions

• Stage of Acceptance

• Values, Priorities, Expectations

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Stage of acceptance

“We don’t receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us” - Marcel Proust

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Journey to Acceptance:Stages of Coping

• Denial– Support & give information

• Resistance– Support & be there when things “crash”

• Affirmation– Provide appropriate information &

resources

• Integration / Acceptance– Reinforce confidence in ability to manage

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How do we feel about sharing the news?

• Sad• Inadequate• Angry• Guilty• Afraid Persuasion Model

Information Model

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Information Model

Poor Communication• Jargon• Advice in booth• Too much information• Power differential• Clinician talks too

much• Unfamiliar

environment• Poor lighting

Good Communication• Less jargon• Get out of booth• Give client time to let

you know they understand

• Use visuals• Support of 3rd person

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How You Tell Makes a Difference

1. If the deliverer of your news handled it well, what made it successful?

2. If the news was not shared well, what would have made it easier for you?

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Effective Sharing: How You Tell Makes a Difference

Planning

SharingTalk “with” not “at”

Acknowledge feelings

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Plan ahead

• Rapport

• Setting

• Message

• Person’s Reaction

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Think about a past or current experience with a family

Refer to the handout & discuss:

1. Which “plan ahead” strategies did you use?

2. Which other strategies could you have used?

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Sharing NewsYou try it!

• Number off & divide into groups of 3

• #1 – sharer of news

• #2 – receiver of news (act as naturally

as possible)

• #3 – observer – record strategies used

by sharer

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Sharing sensitive newsYou tried it!

1. How did you start?2. How did you introduce the sensitive

information?3. How did your recipient react?4. How did you respond?5. How did you continue to share the

information?6. How did you conclude?

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Sharing the News

1. Observe, Wait & Listen

2. Followed the parent’s lead• Get the parent’s perspective & respond

3. Take turns

4. Adjust your language

5. Extend the topic• Strive for agreement• Explore possible solutions • Agree on next steps

6. Scan

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Observe, Wait & Listen

• Be comfortable & relaxed with sharing news

• Find out what parents know & want to know (collaborative)

• Watch for verbal & non-verbal cues

• Deliver a warning shot

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Follow the parent’s lead

• Build on what the parent says

• Be caring & supportive – no blame

• Use active listening – respond to words & feelings

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Take turns

• Pause for parent’s perspective, reaction & questions• Ask open questions & counter-questions• Focus on informing, not disputing• Start with common interests• Agree on problem & priorities before jumping to

solution• Brainstorm various options together• Emphasize “we” not “I” and “you”• Leave the final decision with the parent

“First seek to understand, then to be understood”

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Adjust the way you talk

• Give a little information at a time

• Be clear, specific & understandable

• Use visuals

• Provide written material

• Keep your opening statement brief

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Extend the topic

• Inform

– Clarify the issue

– Share your observations• Explain

– E.g. reasons for your concern & child’s behavior• Talk about feelings and project (child, ECE, parents)• Talk about future

– Outline what happens next

– Arrange for resources & supports

– Set up follow-up date

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Scan

• Carefully observe reactions of all attending the meeting

• Adapt your response to individual needs

• Encourage quieter members to share their perspectives

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PracticeFind the Bloopers

• Divide into groups

• Read the sample script

• Identify the “bloopers” & make suggestions that would improve this interaction between an ECE & a parent

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PracticeRole play

• Divide into groups of 3 • Think of a an example of a situation where you

might have to share some sensitive news with a parent, e.g.– Your child’s language seems delayed– You child isn’t talking at child care– Your child is hitting the other children

• Refer to the hand-out for appropriate strategies• 2 people do the role play & 1 person acts as the

coach• Discuss how it went

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Back to life …

• Which strategies will you use next time you need to share sensitive news with parents?

• Which strategies will you share with your colleagues?