2010 FIRST DATEMaria Falla Reyes

Anthropology 102

Professor Wolfe

November 20, 2010

My friend was going on a date with a girl that he met at school. It was their first date and they were okay with me going with them. They were both Hispanic. I ask the guy if he would date a girl that wasn’t Hispanic and he said yes, but he prefers to date Hispanic girls. His parents would prefer him to date a Nicaraguan girl and his date is from El Salvador. But what is important to him is if she is a nice girl. Before he picked up his date he went to the atm. He is planning to pay but he prefers to pay with cash to impress girls. He says he thinks girls like it when he pays in cash. Different people have different opinion on who should pay. Usually it is the person that asked the other to go. Most of the time the guy asks the girl.

The custom here is for a guy to pick up his date. It is unusual for a girl to pick up a guy. People would think it was odd and the guy would not feel right. So after he went to the atm he went to pick up his date. He said he was nervous. He wanted everything to be perfect. He even went to get his car washed and went to get a haircut earlier. Usually young Hispanic men like to impress girls by looking nice. I noticed he had a rosary hanging from his view mirror. He said religion is very important to him and his culture. He said he likes to date girls that are the same religion. When he arrived to her house he called her to let her know he was outside. Nowadays people call the other person to let them know they are outside. Before when a male would court a girl he would go and knock and get the girl.

His date went to meet him outside. She took about five minutes to go outside. I later asked why and she told me she wanted to make him wait a little. Usually guys like girls that play hard to get and that are not clingy. I thought it was funny but she didn’t want to seem desperate. I noticed that he didn’t open the door for her and she seemed like she expected him not to open the door. She said most guys do not open the doors. You are considered a gentlemen when you open door for girls. Before parents would teach their children to open doors for girls. Now some parents do not teach their children that custom.

When she got in the car I noticed they were both nervous but excited about their first date. Usually people are nervous on their first date and want to impress each other. After she got in her car they were conversing and he was letting her know that they were going to the movies first since it was late. They seemed to like each other.

They went to the movies and he asked her what movie she wanted to see. Usually guys ask the girl what movie they would like to see to please them. Of course he paid for their movie tickets, popcorn, and drinks. She wanted to pay for their food but he refused and wanted to treat her. She later told me she expected him to pay but wanted to offer to be polite. She said normally Hispanic men pay for their whole date but she had a couple experience where she was expected to pay 50 percent. She also thought it was nice of him to let her choose the movie they were going to watch.

They later went to Denny’s Restaurant . He said normally when he goes on a date he likes to take his dates to nice restaurants. But due to the economy he took her to Denny’s restaurant. I noticed that this time he did open the door for her. He said he forgot to open the door for her earlier and was embarrassed. Now that he got to know her a little better he was less nervous and this time he remembered and opened the door. He showed he was a gentleman and she was impressed. Later she told me she didn’t expect him to open the door since he didn’t do it the first time. But she was happy he did.

As they were waiting for the waitress to take their order. They were conversing and having a good time. He was asking her questions about school and work. He wanted to get to know her more. She liked that he wasn’t talking only about himself but trying to get to know her. They started to hit it off and get more comfortable. I noticed that he was more relaxed.Usually on first date the couple try to get to know each other. They talked about their major, where they worked, and asked questions about each other. He also asked her about her religion since religion is important to him. They both discovered they go to the same church but he goes in the morning and she goes in the afternoon.

They just ordered couple of milkshakes because they were both full of the popcorn they ate at the movies. They wanted to go somewhere where they could just sit and talk. She ordered a strawberry milkshake and he ordered a chocolate milkshake. They were getting more comfortable that he offered some of his. In our culture we don’t share with complete strangers only when we feel comfortable. So I could tell they didn’t think of each other as strangers. They were both having a good time getting to know each other that they forgot I was there.

After they finished their milkshake he paid the check. Later he wanted to win her a ball from the machine, so she could have memories of their first date he said. He asked her what color she wanted so he could win it for her. He got her the ball she wanted. He also mentioned to me later wanted to impress her by winning her something.

After their date ,she invited him back to her house so they could talk more. Now it is more common to invite their date back in their house. Before it would be unacceptable to have a male into your house and especially when nobody was home.