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If wishes were horses, then poor men wouldride is a bit of old
folk wisdom. The sayingunderlines the evident fact that desires
areoftentimes not realistic, as in the case of achild desiring to
become Superman. Howev-
er, a realistic desire can become a concretereality in the near
or far future. In order to doso a person usually has to sacrifice
himself
by dedicating time and effort to its realiza-tion. This doesnt
mean that in this life thereisnt such a thing as luck. Lady Luck
isaround but shes so fickle, so unfaithful. If now and then she
should happen to show upin someones life, shes usually not
aroundlong enough to be considered a constant
companion. On the other hand, there aretimes when Lady Luck
comes knocking atsomeones door and that person gets whatthey desire
without having done anything tomerit it; for example, when someone
wins adoor prize or inherits.
However, 99 times out of a 100 a person isgoing to have to take
the time and make theeffort to convert his desire into a
concretereality. The time and effort that is made paysdividends;
that person, at the least, gets ashot at converting his desire into
reality.This point is important!
Many university students desire good socialrelations, some times
for partying, success instudies, a boyfriend or girlfriend,
graduatingand getting a satisfying and well - paying jobright after
graduation. They might also havea strong desire to be esteemed by
others; to
eventually contract a good marriage; to havea comfortable
lifestyle; to achieve recogni-tion, fame; to have and maintain good
physi-
cal, mental, emotional and spiritual health. Allof these desires
and others may be within thereach of some collegians; but not all
of themare within the reach of every student or recentgraduate.
For a desire to become reality you have to begin with really
knowing yourself. Yes! Itsstep number one, believe it or not. Step
num-
ber two is getting rid of, or substituting, what-ever is
blocking a realistic desire from becom-ing a concrete reality. I
guess what Im sayingis you have to be so honest with yourself,
ful-ly seeing your real self and not some imag-ined ideal or
distorted self - projection of your-self. You have to honestly say
to yourself,these are my strengths and these are myweaknesses; this
is whats real about meand these other things are obstacles that I
haveto get rid of, that I must avoid. To put it an-other way, a
person has to recognize whatawesome tools they have in their
(spiritual,
physical and psychological) toolbox so that atthe appropriate
time these tools can be takenout and used to remove what needs to
be re-moved. This will awaken desire like SleepingBeauty and she
will be by your side in the realworld.
Considering some few examples which mirror reality might bring
you to look at some of thetools that may easily be present in most
every-ones toolbox. (1) It may happen that some-one you know is not
as naturally talented or enthused or has as much time to study
assome of his friends. To convert into reality his
desire to get good grades and graduate, thatfriend is going to
have to go into his toolboxand employ such tools as self
-discipline and
perseverance. He is going to have to cut intohis free time, his
time for relaxing and so-cializing and use that time for some
seriousstudy. Now thats a sacrifice that his friendsand classmates
might not have to make! Its
true that that person will have less time tospend on building
-up and sustaining friend-ships or participating in extra
-curricular ac-tivities; how much less time will depend onhow
strong the desire to get good grades andgraduate is. (2) A friend
of yours is downand out because her desire to have a boy-friend
seems to be out of reach. To have achance at converting this desire
into realitythat friend has to take the time and care to
project the best aspects of her persona, her most attractive
physical, spiritual and socialqualities while at the same time not
doingsomersaults and contortions to hide whereshe falls a bit
short. Your friend would haveto do all this without projecting
vanity, prideor being superficial. At the same time sheshouldnt
evidence an overwhelming desireto get into a relationship --- for
what should
be obvious reasons. And so this friend goes
into her toolbox and takes out such tools as prudence, modesty,
personal well -groomingand self -communication. When these toolsare
ably used, a person can project nobility,self -confidence, and
interior joy together with a soft smile on her lips. That smile
andself -confidence becomes a constant witnessof your friends
persona. Moreover, her no-
bility (the healthy social, spiritual and ethicalstandards your
friend lives by) has to do
with virtue. By safeguarding her nobility,this friend of yours
earns the respect of oth-ers. If your friend doesnt do the
necessary
The tools you need to turn desires into positive concrete
realities are the qualities you possess in your inner self...
7/31/2019 #3 The Passion of My Life
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safeguarding, then she might be communi-cating unconsciously (or
consciously?) thatshe is easy game, that she can be convincedinto
sidetracking a healthy and respectfulrelationship for an unhealthy
passing liaison.(3) Lets say that more than anything elsesomeones
great desire is when others refer to him, they will say that he is
the most com-
passionate person they know, that he is amodel for others to
imitate. (That type of appreciation converts a person into a
leader!)How does that someone turn his great desireinto reality?
His first priority should becomeidentifying and replacing, if
possible, what-ever obstacles are hindering the realizationof his
desire. He must then go to his toolboxand take out the tools that
will help turn hisdesire into a concrete reality; tools such
asknowledge , self - sacrifice , humility and inclu-
sive love . The knowledge that is required isnot what you
generally pick up at a collegeor a university lecture or with most
fellow -students. It is a knowledge that your faithtradition
together with careful personal ob-servation will bring you. The
self - sacrifice required in cultivating compassion meansyou have
to share both your talents and ma-terial riches with others, even
when theyhavent expected you to do so. Thats some-thing that can be
done even in a universitysetting and as a college student. Humility
closes the door to pride, to a sense of beingmore, to looking down
your nose at others. Itcertainly isnt a fellow -traveler of
Compas-sion! Finally there is inclusive love. Inclu-
sive love involves your whole person: youwill give what you have
to give in terms of
time, energy, talents and even financial as-sistance to those to
whom you are showing
compassion. However, before doing so youshould first mull over
what that person or those persons really need and not what youare
planning to give them. For Christiansthis is the Martha and Mary
episode repeat-ed. Martha is running around in her desire to
prepare and serve a hungry Jesus, and Maryis awake to Jesus more
urgent need: tran-quility and a loving presence.
The tools you need to turn desires into posi-tive concrete
realities are the qualities you
possess in your inner self. Not all of themare referred to in
the three instances givenabove but all of them and also others can
bethe tools you utilize so that a greater part of your world of
desires has a better chance of
entering your world of concrete reality.What are you waiting
for? Go for it!
DESIRE
College Notes
from Noble Wolf
April 2012
Fr. Adolph Menendez, s.x.
& Emily Stout, Poet
Global Youth Mission Services
101 Summer Street, P.O. Box 5857
Holliston, MA 01746
[email protected]
