A Ladder Without Rungs Travelling Version

8/4/2019 A Ladder Without Rungs Travelling Version

1/16

People who face hardshipand trauma often use

metaphors to describe theirexperiences. They are tryingto express the unimaginable,the inexpressible, and somust draw upon comparisonsto other, more expressible,realities.

Some say that the journey

from trauma to transcendencerequires one to changemetaphors: to identify themetaphors of hurt and lossthat dominate their lives,and to find new metaphorsof hope and wholeness thatwill guide them into thefuture.

Metaphor, in short, plays an

important role in making senseout of hardship and findingways to transcend it.

This exhibit exploresmetaphors of suffering andtrauma from both sides ofcrime: metaphors used bysurvivors of violent crime

to express their experiences,and metaphors used bylife-sentenced prisoners todescribe the sentences theyare serving.

Photographs and interviews byHoward Zehrfrom the booksTranscending: Reflections of Crime

Victims, and Doing Life: Reflectionsof Men and Women Serving Life

Sentences.

Paintings and reflections byManas Ghanem andJudah Oudshoorn.

Thanks to Kate Kessler for her advisoryrole in this project.

aladd

er

with

out

run

gs

EXPLORING

METAPHORS OF

TRAUMA


2/16

FACING LIFE AFTER VIOLENCE:

The men and women in this section are survivors of violent crimes.

This part of the exhibit focuses on their metaphors of trauma and loss.

Further reflections on their journeys to transcend this trauma may be found in the book,

Transcending: Reflections of Crime Victims (Good Books).

For me, the principle virtue in life is courage. I live life like a soldier in battle.I have to charge up the hillagainst darkness, human viciousness, ignorance.Im a soldier for peace.

Josephs sister, with whom he was very close, was murdered. Although the family is certain that the

murderer was her husband, the state has never been able to prove it.

We will face difficulties in life

and in our journey towards

transcending. We should believe

and be guided by the light: the

limit is the sky.

Our journey towards peace,

home, God, truth and reconciliation

is scary and so difficult. However,we keep moving on with courage.

Pain and fear should not stand

in our way. Lots of paths are

available but they are hidden.

We only need to start the journey

and find our wayagainst the

darkness.

Manas Ghanem

Josep

hBar

etta


3/16

Leland Kent

Offenders make a ripple in someones life, but have no clue about the damage

theyve done. And their lives mean nothing to the criminal justice system either.

Leland first learned he had a brother when he was 19. Five years later, his brotherwas murdered.

It is so important to tell the truth. Thats what the book I wrote is aboutgetting thecleansing through the truth.... Writing that book cleansed me and made me feel whole.

I am a victim and I am a triumphant survivor. At first I was really a zombie, awalking dead woman. Now Im alive.

Sandys abusive ex-husband stalked her and shot her in the face with a shotgun.

Sandy tells us the story of a

walking dead woman turned

triumphant survivor. Despite all

the pain and the trauma, she is

still amazingly strong, beautiful

and authentic. It reminds me ofgold that does not lose its true

value no matter what happens.

The golden color is a life full

of hope, care, and it is welcoming

but it is still okay to feel pain.

It takes time to recover and put

yourself together! But it is time

to get up and reclaim your life.

Manas Ghanem

Sand

raMu

rphy


4/16

I cant reorder anything because if I did, I would just pick up the scrambled pieces andput them back in order. Its more likeall the rungs on a ladder are removed. Im atthe bottom and have to start all over. You build, you create a new life. I have a coupleof pieces from my old life that I have to fit in.

Lynns children, Jen and Dave, were murdered by her ex-husband on Christmas eve.

He then killed himself.

already cracked and broken in

numerous places. Stepping on the

branches would have resulted in

another violent fall, a tumble back

into the shadows. This tree is, for

me,a ladder without rungs.

Judah Oudshoorn

What if you were violently shoved

into the lowest, darkest of depths?

And what if there was a ladder

before you, offering a way out?

But what if it wasa ladder

without rungs? For some, this isnot a what ifit is a reality.

While contemplating this I came

across a tree in Virginia that

reminded me of this poignant

metaphor. Cutting back and forth

across the path leading up to this

tree were countless shadows of

other trees, almost appearing like

tangled ladder rungs. Yet they were

only shadows creating a confusing

facade. Looking up from these

pretentious shapes I saw this tree.

A glorious tree. A ladder. A way

out of the shadows.

The branches were inviting,

eagerly awaiting grasping hands

followed by lively feet, saying,

come out of the shadows and

climb. However, as I came closer

to the tree I realized climbing

would not be wise for the branches

were not secure; rather, they were

LynnShine


5/16

At first, grief is so heavy and dark that you just want to get away from it. Then youunderstand that the grief is not ever leaving you. Finally, youve carried it so long thatyou dont notice it. You are like one of thoseladies from Africa with the pots onher head: she carries a massive pot so well that she doesnt even notice it anymore.

I found when the girls died, everything waspeeled awayand I had no excuses.Im stripped down to the bare bones and yet I sense that in the tragedy, Ive been givenan opportunity. Great, now Ive got to feel good about this.

There is a God, I swear there is. He will help you find your way, but you gottalook for it. You gottascratch it out, but hell help you.

Barbaras two teenage daughters, along with two other teenage girls, were found naked and bound

in the charred remains of a yogurt shop where several of them worked.

Despite a great deal of pain, and

the heavy burden of grief that she

has, her strength keeps pushing her

to move on through the difficulties.

TheAfrican ladies walk with

the massive heavy burdens over

their heads, but it does not seem

like a big deal for themthey

barely notice it. They are facing

the challenges of life with pride

and confidence. The pain and grief

that we carry should not prevent

us from moving forward. The light

is the sign for us to keep hoping

and to find peace.

Manas Ghanem

BarbaraA

yres


6/16

There is a certain worldview that

speaks of bonds between human

beings; that is, it suggests thathumanity is interconnected. A

common adage of this worldview

is that the harm of one is the harm

of all; put another way, what

happens to individuals has an effect

on communities as well.

People who have been victims

of violent crime speak of extreme

isolation following these tragicexperiences. The event itself,

compounded by lack of community

care, creates a great deal of pain.

So, the tree in this painting

stands alone. No one can fully

comprehend its pain. Pain is so

fierce that the bark haspeeled

awayfrom the tree, leaving it

stripped to the bone. It is fullyexposed. Beyond voyeuristic

curiosity, does anyone want to at

least try to understand its trauma?

Does anyone want to address its

needs? The painting leaves this

question unresolved. What is clear

is that the harm of this one tree

the dark shadowsreaches the

at-a-distance community of trees.Indeed, the shadows are long

in this painting. They stretch

almost from one edge to the other

and even start in places outside

the borders of the canvas.

Judah Oudshoorn

As I stood at the bottom of this

incredible waterfall, I was

struck by the power of the water.

It arrives from one river, yet

descends the rock in a multitude

of directions. The water cuts itsown path. Over time, the water

has found many routes down the

side of the cliff, even carving new

ways when one is blocked. In a

way, bit by bit, it isscratching

the wayinto and through the

rock. It is finding new ways of

being and journeying.

As I look at this painting, Iimagine myself to be the tree:

intrigued by the water but still

distant from it. I am leaning

towards the water. What is the

water saying? I must get closer. I

want to hear the water. Where is

the water going? I must get closer.

I want to see the paths that it is

taking and to ultimately journeyalongside it to where it ends up.

What will it take to uproot

myself and move in this direction?

Judah Oudshoorn

Metaphor painting for Barbara and Lynn

Metaphor painting for Barbara and Lynn


7/16

Offenders makea ripple in someones life, but have no clue about the damagetheyve done. And their lives mean nothing to the criminal justice system either.

Leland first learned he had a brother when he was 19. Five years later, his brother was murdered.

The blazing light of a setting sun

touches everything in its line of

sight. Evidence of it shows in

clouds, in trees and likewise across

water. Clouds that are normally

grey include yellows. Trees of

green show orange and the usual

blue of water is wrinkled with red.

Far away from the sun itself, many

other forms reflect its fiery glow.

Offenders makea ripple in

someones life. The trauma of

being the victim of a violent crime

is searing like a setting sun. It

touches many areas of a persons

life, rippling out from the event

itself. People victimized frequently

speak of physical harms and even

beyond to worldviews being

shattered and emotions disrupted.

I wanted to paint a scene that

is typically viewed as beautiful.

But rather than only express this,

I wanted it to also represent the

ugly, the painful. I find so much

of life to be a paradox: joy

wrapped up with sorrow, healing

at the same time as hurting, and

hope in the midst of despair.

I believe Leland Kent sums this

up in part when he says he gets

joy out of helping people when

they are most vulnerable, because

he has personally experienced

how offenders make a ripple in

someones life.

Judah Oudshoorn

Leland

Kent


8/16

Youve just completed this beautiful puzzle. All of a sudden, someone comes alongand just swishes it off the table and you have to start putting it back together. Thentheres a piece missing that you just cant find anywhere.... Im a butterfly person,just flapping my wings and going. Now Im hoping to make a difference in peopleslives. Ive gotten involved in victim services because.... Im hoping to make a differencein someones life, not by giving advice, but by walking through it with them, by beinga leaning post.

Joannes sister was killed by a drunken driver, a repeat offender.

The butterflyis a survivor. It

faces the world with all the charm

of its beauty, flapping its wings in

the face of lifes difficulties andproblems. It travels, crossing vast

spaces and distances toward light

and hope.

The journey can lead to

other horizons that are much

brighter and prettier than what it

experienced before. The butterfly

remains beautiful; its beauty

forces whoever sees it to thinkwith hope. It leaves a smattering

of smiles on tired faces.

Manas Ghanem

Jo

anne

Vogt


9/16

FACING A LIFE SENTENCE:

The men and women in this section were convicted of being directly or indirectly involved

in a murder. They are now serving life sentences; they have virtually no possibility of

being released. Many came to prison when they were quite young. Most have been in for

many years. This part of the exhibit focuses on their experiences of life sentences.

Other issues they discussed may be found in the book, Doing Life: Reflections

of Men and Women Serving Life Sentences (Good Books).

The sentence of life without parole is nothing short ofexecution by installment,the death penalty in slow motion.... Every time I watch the space shuttle go up, I thinkof taking a walk in space and being left up there, waiting for time to end. Thats whata life sentence is like.

Tyrone began his life sentence in 1976.

Tyrone

Werts


10/16

Its aslow, torturous death.... I look at the electric chair as more humane thanbeing tortured like this. Yet I dont believe in the death penalty because its got to stopsomewhere. Violence doesnt solve anything.

Benjamins life sentence began in 1976.

Slowly, steadily, viciously, over

time, a magnificent rock can

be broken apart and reduced

piece-by-piece to indecipherable

rubble. This is nothing shortofexecution by installment.

Rains come and erode the rock.

The ground freezes, plant life

dies, the rock shifts, cracks and

slowly breaks apart. For the rock, it

is aslow, torturous death. And it

does not end until every last bit is

crushed.

This painting has dull qualities:there is very little color and the

subjectthe rockis portrayed

from a tedious angle. For me, this

drabness represents hopelessness.

In addition there are frustrating

features to this painting: shapes

and lines are blurred, and fore-

ground merges with background

in an almost two-dimensionalfashion. This speaks to anguish.

Hopelessness and anguish: two

life-taking emotions for those

serving life sentences.

Significantly, by installment

usually means something being

received (in exchange for payments).

On the contrary, the outcome

of execution by installment issomething takena life. No, it

is not the death penalty per se;

nonetheless, according to Tyrone

Werts it is the death penalty in

slow motion, a slow, torturous

death.

Judah Oudshoorn

Benjam

inVela

sQuez

Metaphor painting for Tyrone and Benjamin


11/16

A life sentence isa glass bottle. Youre planted in this foreign soil, this culturalabyss. They want you to grow, but in growing, if you arent careful, you begin to takethe shape and form of your environment. One of my proudest accomplishments is thatI have managed to grow without taking the shape of my environment.

Bettys life sentence began in 1984.

Lifers exist in prison as if in dark

glass bottles. They were put there

once, a long time ago, and will

stay there forever. We dont know

what is going on in there. We label

the bottles as bad or dangerous

and forget about the person. We

forget about the human being

inside.My soul is green and is growing

out of the bottle towards light.

Light is hopehope that someone

will care, that someday I will be

able to right what I did wrong and

contribute to my community. It is

so hard to see light in here, it is

just too dark. But am I dreaming

again? Is it a real string of lightthat my soul is following? Or is it

an illusion created in my imagina-

tion to hang on to?

Manas Ghanem

Betty

Heron


12/16

Its like fishing. The river looks calm and you forget to drop anchor. You dont realizeyour boat has started to drift into rapids. Then you getstuck in a whirlpool. You getsucked under and then come back to the surface. Other people go by and they miss it,but youre stuck in that whirlpool. Just about the time you think youll be able to breakfree of this, the water sucks you right back.

Marilyn began her life sentence in 1973. She was originally sentenced to death.

As I look at this painting I am

drawn to the place where the

waterfall collides with the river.

Indeed, our eye is often pulled

towards the place of greatest

contrast in an image.

Water is at times beautiful

and peaceful, yet it can also be

extremely murky and violent.

It takes on many contrasting

forms: water is deafening while

other times inaudible, rapidly

flowing yet sometimes still,

liberating and also entrapping,

life-giving and life-taking. Marilyn

Dobrolenski evocatively describes

the trauma of a life sentence in

terms of the darker, crueler side

of water. She says it is like getting

stuck in a whirlpool. As a

whirlpool viciously pulls one

towards it, similarly Gaye Morley

suggests that serving a life sentence

is likea vacuum: a process where

everything is sucked out, leaving

one with nothing.

Nothing.

Judah Oudshoorn

MarilynDobro

lenski

Metaphor painting for Marilyn and Gaye


13/16

A life sentence isa vacuum. Everything is trying to be sucked out of me, leaving mewith nothing. I know I have to fight that. I have to create a whole world within myselfand hopefully be able to spread that to those around me.

Gaye has been serving her life sentence since 1991.

Everything is just too huge and

strong. The storm and the winds

are blowing everything away.

It is even trying to take life from

this lonely tree. How long can this

tree hang on like this? Wind is

still blowing everything away,

leavinga vacuum, nothing but alonely tree that is trying to stay

alive, holding onto some of its

leaves and reaching out to light.

Manas Ghanem

GayeMorle


14/16

Its a tunnel without light at the end. It just goes nowhere. An endless black holethat keeps sucking everything in.... What makes it tolerable is hope.... You cant existwithout hope.

Bruce began his life sentence in 1982.

Drain pipes are rarely noticed.

I have walked by so many in my

lifetime without acknowledging,

let alone being aware, of them. I

do not really consider this a

faultdrain pipes are meant to

be hidden, covertly tucked into

landscapes so as not to be seen.

Sometimes they are expediters of

excess, sometimes of waste.

Lifers are rarely noticed. Theirs

is a world of drain pipes. People

serving life sentences exist within a

tunnel without light at the end, a

place of no hope. Does living in

such a place mean that these are a

people without hope? Bruce

Bainbridge still has hope: from

within, and from friendships.

This, for him, is what makes

an endless black hole that keeps

sucking everything intolerable.

This painting, for me,

expresses human life interacting

with systems. Sometimes systems

are like rocks. They allow us

blades of grassa concrete

foundation to reach new heights

together. Conversely, at times

these rocks suffocate life, by

blocking sunlight. Then there are

drain pipes: systems that are like

a tunnel without light at the end.

How far down a drain pipe can

grass grow?

Judah Oudshoorn

BruceBain

bridge


15/16

Its like arabbit up in the cornerthat cant get out. It keeps trying, but eventuallyit just dies there.

I was running wild, like an animal. I was violent because it seemed nobodyunderstood me. I couldnt explain myself and it came out like violent storms.Then I started getting in touch with myself by being alone. Thats what made mehappy, so I just stay alone.

Trinas life sentence began in 1977.

She has been staying there for

so long, arabbit in a corner.

Her feet are blended with the floor.

She lost her facial features, almost

lost the color of life. She is so

vulnerable. But what to do? There

is no way out. Everything looks

dark and there is nothing but

memories that flash from the past.

Wait, is there hope somewhere

up there? Does someone recognize

her sitting there in the corner?

Manas Ghanem

TrinaG

arnett


16/16

When lifer Irvin Moore says,

A life sentence is like an

insect encased in amber,

the word like lets us know

he is making a comparison.

A life sentence and an insect

in amber are not identical, but

they have some things in

common. He is using a simile

or analogy to help us under-

stand a life sentence.

A metaphor also comparesone thing to another, but the

speaker does not say that it

is a comparison. Instead, the

speaker seems to equate the

two, making one thing stand

for another. When lifer Gaye

Morley declares that A life

sentence is a vacuum,she is using a metaphor.

In this project we are using

the term metaphor loosely,

including all of these forms

of comparison.

Distribution is made possible through

Mennonite Central Committee.

www.mcc.org

ON

METAPHOR

THE

ARTISTS

Howard Zehr is Co-Director of theCenter for Justice & Peacebuilding (CJP)

at Eastern Mennonite University. Judah

Oudshoorn is doing restorative justice

work in Ontario, Canada with people

who have committed sexual offenses.

Manas Ghanem is working for the U.N.

with refugees as a Protection Consultant

in her home country of Syria, and around

the Middle East. This exhibit was

developed while Manas and Judah were

completing their MA degrees at CJP.

Documents

A Ladder Without Rungs Travelling Version