Tallahassee.com | sUNday, JUly 24, 2011Tallahassee Democrat

Tallahassee’s sunday Magazine

act naturally‘Reluctant thespian’ Kathleen osgood makes some noise at monticello opera house

Page 8 / Sunday, July 24, 2011 Tallahassee Democrat / TLH

From clowning to theater, Osgood gives her allGrowing up, Kathleen

Osgood didn’t set out to become a professional clown or the onstage sound effects person for a live radio theater company. She wanted to be a farmer.

“They called me ‘the reluctant thespian,’ because I’d do anything to stay behind the cur-tain instead of getting on the stage,” laughs Osgood. “But I always ended up in every school play and church play, plus I was in the band. But I wasn’t one of the people who dreamed about being a performer — I wanted to go into agri-culture.”

Osgood got a degree in entomology with a minor in agriculture education from the University of Florida. She went to work for the Florida Depart-ment of Agriculture, where she remained for 25 years — the job eventu-ally brought Osgood to her present perch in Monticel-lo. She retired two months ago.

She is doing her best to enjoy her retirement to the fullest — taking a two-week trip to Europe with her 86-year-old father, adopting a new Labrador puppy and performing in shows at the Monticello Opera house. At the same time, she is fighting late-stage lung cancer, which — even though she never smoked — has spread to her bones.

It was while living and teaching in Key West right after graduation that Osgood finally succumbed to the lure of performance. She needed to take con-tinuing education classes for her teaching certifi-cate, and one of the cours-es she took was a class in clowning.

“The teacher was from Amsterdam, and he was with the Pigeon Drop Theatre, a street theater

group. Their business card was a picture of … well, you can imagine,” says Osgood. “He put me together with two other women and we became The Spumoni Sisters, the world’s best all-female clown troupe. Well, really, the world’s only all-female clown troupe.”

For several years, The Spumoni Sisters worked in Key West, and on school breaks they trekked across the South to perform on the streets of New Orleans. Unfortunately, a bad car accident ended the troupe’s travels.

“I was in full clown makeup, and I got thrown through the windshield onto the car that hit us. It was raining, and they skid-ded into us really hard, and I smacked against the glass like a bug,” says Osgood. “I left an imprint of clown makeup — this squashed white face on the windshield.

“It’s weird, but when I found out my cancer had metastasized, the doc-tor explained that it only gets into bones that have already been weakened, and asked me if I’d ever hurt my neck in a car acci-dent. I guess that really came back years later to haunt me.”

Soon after the accident, Osgood returned to her hometown of Palmetto and began working in agri-cultural labs. She taught clowning classes on the side at Manatee Communi-ty College while also con-tinuing her professional clowning career. Some of her students went on to the Ringling Bros. and Bar-num & Bailey Clown Col-lege.

She taught a wide range of clowning skills, includ-ing makeup, mime, jug-gling and even fire-eating. But the most important skill for a clown, Osgood says, is to learn to express things with your body.

“If you’re trying to con-

vey that you are smart, you would lead with your head. And if you’re try-ing to convey that you are stupid, you let your head hang back,” she explains. “If you want to express loving kindness, you hold your hands back so that your chest — your heart — is out. You’re portraying a character and your body has to go along with it.”

A double-dog dareWhen her work with the

Department of Agriculture brought her to Monticello in 2006, Osgood set about making new friends in the area. She took a local art class and got involved in the garden club, where she met a friend who liked to see the shows at the Mon-ticello Opera House. They started attending together.

When her friend read about upcoming auditions for an opera house pro-duction of “Casablanca,” she “double-dog dared” Osgood to try out. Osgood did, and she got the part of “First Man Shot.” Soon after, she started putting her clowning skills to good use as the official Foley artist — the person who creates the onstage sound

effects — for the Opera House Stage Company’s live radio plays.

“Clowning is a great background for Foley work,” says Osgood. “I came into the job think-ing I was just going to get to make cool sounds. But I realized a big part of it is visual, too. All the other actors are just standing still, so the sound effects people are the ones every-one watches while they lis-ten to the stories.”

Osgood could just hit a table to mimic punching sounds for a fight scene, but she doesn’t. She smash-es a cabbage with a billy club. It sounds better, she explains, but it also makes the cabbage explode like coleslaw all over her clothes and hair. It gets a laugh every time.

“One time we needed an avalanche, which is a hard sound to make,” remem-bers Osgood. “We ended up using a huge wheelbarrow full of rocks that I pushed to the front of the stage and dumped down a wood-en slide into the orchestra pit. The rocks and gravel slid into the pit, and there was a giant dust cloud that rose up. We always got a standing ovation for the avalanche.”

Her biggest challenge in sound effects was for a sci-ence fiction piece called,

“The Amoeba That Went Slurp.” It called for the sound of a human-sized amoeba falling into a bath-tub. Osgood says that while you can find almost any-thing on the Internet these days, you can’t find that.

“We started out throw-ing liver into a bowl. It was disgusting, but it was a good visual,” she laughs. “But it smelled bad and it didn’t make the right sound anyway. We exper-imented with about 20 different Jell-O recipes before we got the right texture and the right bowl to make the perfect splat noise.”

The current show is an evening of live radio the-ater from the 1940s and ‘50s and includes an epi-sode of “The Lone Rang-er,” a sci-fi piece called “The Strange World of Dr. Weird” and the classic comedy “You Can’t Take It With You.”

Osgood and Foley part-ner Richard Clifford per-form all the sound effects in the show, plus wrote some of the original jin-gles and commercials that the cast performs.

“I wear an authentic 1940s lilac dress that I got at a vintage store, along with my sound effects shoes, which happen to be red cowboy boots,” says Osgood. “Those boots can

cover the whole range — I can make the sound of cowboys, businessmen or secretaries in high heels, depending on how I walk in them.”

Osgood has a rule that every sound effect has to be created using items that existed during the period of the play, or as close a replica as she can find. For the fireworks in “You Can’t Take It With You,” she bangs together hinged two-by-fours while simultane-ously conducting the cast in blowing up and popping paper bags.

“We do pretty silly things,” she says. “But we try to be as authentic and entertaining as we can be.”

Osgood’s nephew, 11-year-old Christopher, is spending part of this summer with her, going to space camp in Tallahas-see and making his stage debut in the show. He will be playing second har-monica and performing in some of the commercials.

“This has really been wonderful having him here,” says Osgood. “I know my time is limited, and I’ve been trying — while I’m still healthy — to spend as much time with him as I can.”

By Randi AtwoodSpecial to the Democrat

Kathleen Osgood prepares to smack a cabbage to make sound effects for a fight scene.

if you goWhat: Live Radio Theater, with dinner/lunch optionWhere: Monticello Opera House, 185 W. Washing-ton St., MonticelloWhen: Doors open at 6:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, with dinner served at 7 p.m. and the show at 8 p.m.; doors open at 12:30 p.m. July 31, with lunch served at 1 p.m. and the matinee at 2 p.m.Cost: $25 for dinner/lunch and the show, $20 for opera house members; show only tickets are $15 for the general public, $12 for opera house membersContact: Call 997-4242 or go to www.monticello-floridaoperahouse.com

TLH / Tallahassee Democrat Sunday, July 24, 2011 / Page 9

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TLH / Tallahassee Democrat Sunday, July 24, 2011 / Page 7

Representative learned piano early, politics much laterA few artful questions

for Rep. Michelle Rehwin-kel Vasilinda.

Q: Can you play a musi-cal instrument?

A: My parents started me taking piano lessons at around 7 years old. We were fortunate to live near the University of Roch-ester and its Eastman School of Music. I used to love walking through the practice rooms and hear-ing the philharmonic tuba, cello and trumpet players practicing their scales as I went on to my lessons. Now I play the piano, when I have time, for my own enjoyment.

Q: Do you own any origi-nal art?

A: We own more than a dozen pieces of art from local and regional artists that have been purchased locally and at the Planta-tion Wildlife Arts Festi-val (which my husband has sponsored since its incep-tion), as well as two pieces by Dale Chihuly, which we bought at the Brogan when his work was here.

Q: What was the first concert you ever attended?

A: My first live perfor-mance concert would have been the Rochester Bal-let’s “Nutcracker,” prob-ably around the age of 3. I also remember seeing a dance company per-

form dances from “Seven Brides for Seven Broth-ers,” and an orchestra per-form Copland’s work in elementary school.

Q: What book is on your night stand right now?

A: I am currently read-ing “Plain Honest Men: The Making of the Ameri-can Constitution,” by Rich-ard Beeman, as well as “A Game of Thrones,” by

George R. R. Martin, and a book of poems on New York City.

Q: When was the last time you danced?

A: Mike and I last danced when he joined me in the basement while I was exercising to Michael Jackson’s “Thrill-er” album. In public, we danced at Gov. Scott’s inauguration and at Lt.

Gov. Carroll’s welcoming reception ball.

Q: What was the last live performance you saw?

A: Mike and I spent my birthday (July 9) in New York City and saw live jazz — the Heath Brothers at the Village Vanguard — as well as the plays “War Horse” and “Avenue Q.”

Q: What movie has most affected you?

A: The movies “Cool Hand Luke” and “The Sound of Music” both made a big impact on me at a young age because they are about courage, determination and working for something bigger than yourself. One was sad, the other joyous, but the theme is similar.

Q: When was the last time you were on a stage?

A: I was on the stage of the Young Actors Theatre recently making a short speech for the introduction of a performance of “The Diary of Anne Frank,” which was a fundraiser for the Holocaust Education Resource Council.

Q: What artistic talent do you wish you had?

A: I wish I had the sing-ing talent of a Barbra Stre-isand or Whitney Hous-ton — someone with a big voice, musicality, heart, great range and always, always in tune!

Special to the DemocratContaCt CoCaVisit COCA’s websites at www.cocanet.org and www.more-thanyouthought.com. Send suggestions for artist profiles, news items, story ideas or fun facts to COCA at cultural@cocanet.org.

GLENN BEIL/DEmocrat fILEs

Michelle Rehwinkel Vasilinda during the Florida Legisla-ture’s special session.

BESt-SELLERSHARDCOVER FICTION1. “A Dance With Dragons”

by George R.R. Martin 2. “Now You See Her” by

James Patterson, Michael Led-widge

3. “Then Came You” by Jen-nifer Weiner

4. “Smokin’ Seventeen” by Janet Evanovich

5. “State of Wonder” by Ann Patchett

6. “Quinn” by Iris Johansen 7. “Before I Go to Sleep” by

S.J. Watson8. “Against All Enemies” by

Tom Clancy and Peter Telep9. “One Summer” by David

Baldacci10. “Iron House” by John

Hart11. “The Silent Girl: A Riz-

zoli & Isles Novel” by Tess Ger-ritsen

12. “Maine” by J. Courtney Sullivan

13. “The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest” by Stieg Larsson

14. “The Paris Wife” by Pau-la McLain

15. “The Devil Colony” by James Rollins

HARDCOVER NONFICTION1. “A Stolen Life” by Jaycee

Dugard 2. “Go the (Bleep) to

Sleep” by Adam Mansbach and Illustrations by Ricardo Cortes

3. “Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption” by Laura Hillenbrand

4. “In the Garden of Beasts” by Erik Larson

5. “The 17 Day Diet: A Doc-tor’s Plan Design for Rapid Results” by Dr. Mike Moreno

6. “Of Thee I Zing” by Laura Ingraham with Raymond Arroyo

7. “Bossypants” by Tina Fey8. “The 4-Hour Body” by Tim-

othy Ferriss9. “The Greater Journey” by

David McCullough

10. “The Dukan Diet” by Pierre Dukan

11. “SEAL Team Six” by How-ard E. Wasdin and Stephen Templin

12. “Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived” by Rob Bell

13. “Lies That Chelsea Han-dler Told Me” by Chelsea’s Family, Friends & Other Victims

14. “Through My Eyes” by Tim Tebow and Nathan Whi-taker

15. “Sex on the Moon” by Ben Mezrich

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