AHDB Team Boost Building trust through improving the quality of your conversations

www.markdenton.co.uk

RitualorCliché–justpoliteconversa1on.Morning,howareyou,howwasyourjourney,isn’ttheweatherlovely?Butareweevenlisteningtowhatcomesback?Oristhisjustourusualdailyritualthatdoesn’treallyaddmuchvalueotherthanacknowledgingsomeone

ThenextlevelupiscalledFactsandInforma4on,whereweexchangejustthat.“Howdidthemilkinggoyesterday?Didthatdeliveryarrive?HowareyougeFngonwiththatstocktake?”Justtaskbasedtransac1onalchat.Butatleastweareconversingandassuchlisteningtoeachotherandinturn‘seeingeachother’.Butsofarthisisjustsafeandshallowconversa1on

Nowlet’sdigaliLledeeper.Todothatwehavetobeupfortakingabitofrisk,andsharingaliLlemoreofourownviewstogetotherstoopenup.“Here’swhatIthinkofthatnewtechnique-what’syouropinion?Whatideasdoyouhavetoimproveproduc1vity?Here’sacoupleofmythoughts”.Thenyou’llreallystarttohearsomeone,butonlyifyoumakeitsafetodoso

Butifyoureallywanttounderstandand‘get’someoneelse,thenyouhavetotakeittothenextlevelandmakeitsafetoshareFeelingsandEmo4ons.“Tobehonesti’mabitfrustratedjustnow.Howareyoufeelingaboutit?”.Theymaybethesameormaybenot.Butjustbecausesomeonehasadifferentfeelingthatdoesn’tmakethemwrong,itjustmakesthemdifferent!

Andthemorewegetcomfortablewithmorein-depthconversa1onswithoutendingupinconflict,themorewewillendupinRapport,wheretalkingisjusteasyandwecantalkaboutanything.Andthat’swhenwecanreallycollaborateandsupporteachother.Justthinkofyourbestfriend-thatdidn’thappenbyaccident,ittookeffortandrisktoclimbthepyramid!

Thebe&erweknowandunderstandeachother, thebe&erwewillwork together.Andone indica8onofhowwellweknoweach other is through analysing the quality of the conversa8onbetweenus. ‘The Communica8on Pyramid’ is asimplemodelthatshowsthedifferentlevelsandwhatthatreallymeansinrealityconnec8on-wisebetweentwopeople.

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Sowhynotgiveitagowithyourcolleagues.Justthinkaboutwhatlevelyourdialogueisatnowwitheachpersoninyourteamandtrytotakeittothenextlevelbymakingtheeffortandtakingali&lerisk!

AHDB Team Boost Understanding ourselves and others better

www.markdenton.co.uk

ThosewithanAnaly&calstylearecau8ous,thorough,methodicalandlogical.Theyaremorelikelytomakedecisionsbasedonthefactsathandratherthanemo8onalreasoningorgut.Theyjustwanttoberight.Overdonestrength:Canoveranalyse,betoocau8ousanddeliberatetoolong,especiallyifthefactsaremissing

A tool to help you understand yourself and get to know one another, is a simple personality diagnos8c called ‘Social Styles’, whichcategorises our underlying social preferences under four ‘types’. To find out your own preference all you have to do is read thestatementsand then8ck those thatyou feel reflect thewayyouprefer tooperate. It’snormal tohavea spreadacross twoormoreboxes.Weareaheadymix,butyourhighestscoreisyour‘default’mode.

Sowhichisyourdefault?Andwhichareothers?Andwhatisityoucandotomodifyyourownbehavioursothatyouareplayingtoyourstrengthsratherthanbeing‘overdone’.Andhowcanyouadaptyourownstyletobemoreaccommoda8ngoftheotherstyles?Becauseeachhasitsownvalue,andifwejusttakeasteptowardseachotherandthinkwhatisitIcoulddotoconnectbe&erwiththem,we’dallgetalongali&lebitbe&er.Giveitagoanddiscusstheresultsasateam!

ThosewithanAmiablestylearefriendly,suppor8ve,fairandhelpful.Theylikenothingmorethancrea8nganenvironmentofharmonyandbeinginclusivesothatnoonefeelsleSout.Theyareallaboutdoingtherightthingbyothers.Overdonestrength:Canputothersneedsbeforetheirownandbecomeoverburdened

ThosewithanExpressivestyleareoSenthelifeandsouloftheparty.Theyliveforthemoment,liketobethecatalystforbringingpeopletogether,arebigpicturethinkersandrelishtakingrisks.Theyalsotalkalot,andaboutanything!Overdonestrength:Canlackfocusanda&en8ontodetail,andtakeunnecessaryrisks

ThosewithaDriverstylethriveongeUngthingsdone.Theyaregoaldriven,wanttowin,andhaveli&letoleranceforanythingthatgetsintheway.Theyarealsoopinionated.OverdoneStrength:Cansome8mesbepoorlistenersandintheirhastemightmisssomeoneelse’ssugges8onthatcouldgetanevenbe&erresult.