ALIGNING THOUGHT, ACTION AND INTENT: THE RECIPE FOR SUCCESS

Presented by: Janis Whitlock

jlw43@cornell.edu

The Bronfenbrenner Center for Translational Research (BCTR)

AGENDA

• What is the relationship between our frame of mind and success?

• Lucky or unlucky

• Fixed or flexible

• Stress: what is it really?

• Tools and practices

LUCKY OR UNLUCKY?

Are you largely: • Lucky• Unlucky• Both• Neither

PICTURE THIS..• 1 group of self-identified “lucky”

people

• 1 group of self-identified “unlucky” people

• A newspaper

THEIR TASK• Count the number of photographs

• Record their start and end time

WHICH GROUP WAS FASTEST? WHY?

WHAT DID RICHARD WISEMAN FIND?On average:

• Unlucky people took about 2 minutes to count the image

• Lucky people took just seconds

BECAUSE:• The second page of the newspaper

contained the message:

• This message took up half of the page and was written in type that was more than 2in high

• There was another message halfway through the paper:

WHY?On average:

• Unlucky people tend to be much more tense than lucky people; this anxiety disrupts the ability to notice the unexpected

Lucky people

• Create and notice chance opportunities

• Listen to their intuition

• Create self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations

• Adopt a growth-oriented attitude that transforms bad luck into opportunity

THE BIG PICTURE: WHAT WE KNOW ABOUT THRIVING IN THE LONG HAUL

WE HAVE LEARNED ABOUT WHAT MAKES A WELL-LIVED LIFE

• Longitudinal studies spanning many decades across multiple populations

• Multi level, integrated study of risk and protective factors across contexts, time and populations

• Focused study of particular questions, such as what explains thriving despite the odds?

Vaillant, G. E., & Mukamal, K. (2001). Successful aging. American Journal of Psychiatry, 158(6), 839-847.

Family socio economic status

Adult income

Intelligence (IQ)

Innate shyness / anxiety

Typical markers of physical health such as cholesterol

WHAT MATTERS LESS THAN YOU MAY THINK

• Positive and loving connection to others• Opportunities for sense of mastery and

competence

• Cognitive flexibility

• Emotional flexibility

• Impulse regulation and directedness

• Positive practices and self-effort

• Cultivation of meaning and sense of life purpose

Cognitive

Behavioral

MotivationalRelational

Emotional

Spiritual/existential

WHAT MATTERS MOST

WE KNOW THAT MUCH OF IT CAN BE CHALKED UP TO

“MINDSET”

A habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations

The thriver model:It is not the quality of an event, but the way it is processed, that is critical for the occurrence of inner growth and resilience.

Thought

EmotionAction

Emotions, thoughts, and actions are all linked.

Thoughts/emotions/ actions are embedded in ”purpose frameworks” that may be quite unconscious. this is difficult.

WHAT IS THE IDEA BEHIND “ALIGNMENT”?

Intent

T-E-A

Outcomes

EMOTION AND WELLBEING: THE LINK BETWEEN HEART AND MIND

The heart and brain ‘talk’ to one another and together they set the rhythms for the entire nervous system and body. In fact, the heart sends more signals to the brain than the brain sends to the heart.

Feelings of frustration, anger and anxiety cause the neural activity in the two branches of the autonomic nervous system to get out of sync – this can disrupt our ability to think clearly.

https://www.heartmath.com/science/

THE LINK BETWEEN AFFECTIVE ENGAGEMENT & LEARNING AND RECALL• Emotionally charged events are remembered

better

• It's the emotional arousal, not the importance of the information, that helps memory

• Positive emotions are typically remembered better and contain more contextual details (which in turn, helps memory)

• Emotion acts on memory at all points of the memory cycle - at encoding, consolidation, and retrieval

WHY DOES IT MATTER WHAT I THINK: IT’S WHAT HAPPENS OUTSIDE THAT

MATTERS!

Not so:

u The vast majority of the most widely used and effective psychological therapies rely on altering cognition and ability to experience and accept emotion (ex. CBT, DBT, ACT, EFT, EMDR)

u Our beliefs and expectations have been repeatedly shown to have profound effects on physical, emotional, mental, and relational wellbeing. For example:

The Placebo effect

Phantom Limbs (9:20-17:20)

FIXED VERSUS GROWTH ORIENTATION

• A “fixed mindset” assumes that our character, intelligence, and creative ability are static givens which we can’t change in any meaningful way; striving for success and avoiding failure at all costs become a way of maintaining the sense of being smart or skilled.

• A “growth mindset,” on the other hand, thrives on challenge and sees failure not as evidence of unintelligence but as a heartening springboard for growth and for stretching our existing abilities.

Dweck, C. S. (2008). Mindset: The new psychology of success. Random House Digital, Inc..

IN SUM: A VERY LARGE BODY OF EVIDENCE CONSISTENTLY

SHOWS• How we frame our story (of our life or independent events) shapes what comes next!

• Key ingredients: PERCEIVING• Meaning• supportive relationships• positive emotions

In short: we see what we believe NOT the other way around

Once the ball gets rolling, the whole system in affected

Through cognitive and affective flexibility

Magic ratio: 3 to 1

PRACTICES

CONTEMPLATE YOUR “WHY”

Understand your purpose framework (your “why”)

• Journaling to prompts such as:• What matters to me most in life?• Why am I in graduate school? What do I want out of it?• What feelings and thoughts do I associate with my

graduate experience? • Other prompts?

• Note: See if you can practice “radical self-honesty” during these contemplations.

FIND CORE LIMITING BELIEFS AND WORK THEM

Using Byron Katie’s “The Work” handout to:• Identify core stressful thoughts• Examine and reframe• Concretize reframe through mindfulness, journaling, or

gratitude practice

MINDFULNESS PRACTICES

• Definition: A mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique

• Practice:• Regularity more important than quantity; find your sweet

spot and stick to it• Can be still or active (sitting meditation or mindful

moment)• Routine: as simple or complex as desired (incorporate

yoga, mantra repetition, retreats) • Use aids as needed (apps, web-based media, groups)• Mark Williams guided meditation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUeEnkjKyDs

RESOURCES Raise awareness and emphasize value of emotion and self-knowing

Check out:Inventory of strengths: http://www.viacharacter.org/VIASurvey/tabid/55/Default.aspxEnneagram: http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/Multiple intelligence and types: http://literacyworks.org/mi/assessment/findyourstrengths.htmlKelly McGonigal on Stress: http://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend?language=en#t-219195

Mindfulness and contemplation skills• Moment meditations ( can be brief and focused on using any sense) • Self-inquiry and reflection• Positive and negative trigger logs

Check out:http://www.gestaltreview.com/Portals/0/GR1201Hooker&Fodor.pdfhttp://joyfullyrejoycing.com/changing%20parenting/mindfulparentingzinn.htmlhttp://www.qesn.meq.gouv.qc.ca/Portfolio/eng/theory-R.htmhttp://us.reachout.com great web site – how to cope with difficult times - with youth stories, facts, audio and video clips

Creative outlets (multisensory)• Youtube creation• Vision boards• AutobiographiyCheck out:

http://www.makeavisionboard.com/vision-board-gratitude-board-for-kids.html