ANXIETYA Parent workshop

Sue Fraser / Pat Griffin

Primary Mental Health Workers

Aims of workshop

• What is anxiety?• What does anxiety look like?• How do I know if my child is

anxious?• How do I help?• Resources / further information

What is anxiety?

Nervous, Scared, Worried.

Mild anxiety can be vague and unsettling but severe anxiety can have a serious impact on daily life

Normal anxiety vs extreme anxiety

Generally speaking, anxiety occurs when a reaction is out of proportion to what might normally be expected in a situation

Anxiety is subjective.

Causes of anxiety

May be more than one cause

• Anxiety can run in families.

• Personality type/temperament

• Difficult or stressful events in childhood:

e.g. bereavement, house/school moves, parental separation or disharmony, experience of bullying, friendship difficulties, school work difficulties…..

COMMON FEARS

5 – 6 Years

-Separation from caretakers

-Imaginary Creatures

-Burglars

-Sleeping alone

-Natural disasters

-Animals

-Dying or death of others

COMMON FEARS

7-8 Years

-Imaginary creatures

-Staying alone

-Personal harm

-Media exposure to “events”

-Failure and criticism

-Frightening dreams

-Animals

COMMON FEARS

9-12 Years

-Failure and criticism

-Rejection

-Peer bullying

-Kidnapping

-Dying or death of others

-Personal harm or harm to

others

-Illness

How does anxiety affect us?

Physical symptoms

“Trouble catching breath”

Stomach aches/ headaches

Nausea

Frequent trips to the toilet/nurse’s office @ school

Tightness or pain in the chest

Sweating

Dizziness or light headedness

Heart racing or beating faster than normal

Feeling faint

Shake or feeling jittery

Sleep problems

Psychological affects of anxiety

An overwhelming sense of fearful anticipation

Constant worrying

Heightened alertness and a tendency to ‘catastrophise’

Low mood ( over time )

Feeling scared, panicky

Low self esteem

Behavioural affects of anxiety

Poor concentration

Withdrawal / Social isolation

Sleep disturbance

Eating difficulties

Anger

Lacking in confidence

Overly compliant

When does anxiety become a disorder?

Avoidance

Interference

Distress

Types of anxiety disorder

Generalised anxiety disorder

Separation anxiety

Fears / Phobias

Social anxiety

School based anxiety

Obsessions and compulsions

Panic disorder

Selective mutism

What do we see in the school and home setting?

“Blends into the wallpaper”

Always expects the worst

Excessive worry about upsetting others

Asks questions continually

Perfectionist

Excessive worry about failure

Wiggles, is jittery, shaky, high strung, tense and unable to relax

Lack self-confidence/seems very unsure of themselves

MANAGING ANXIETY

DO

Be sensitive

Understand your child’s anxiety

Give positive feedback

Be consistent

Seek additional resources

DON’T

Accommodate the anxiety

Single the child out

Provide excessive reassurance

ACCOMMODATE = DON’T

In some cases, protecting your child from anxiety and/or distress can actually maintain the anxiety vs. reduce it

How can I help my child?

Have the same expectations of your anxious child as you would another child (the pace may need to be slower).

Build on your child’s strengths (for younger children, use sticker/reward charts if helpful)

Let your child do things on his/her own. It is best NOT to do it for your child.

Do not get caught in continuous reassurance (What if). Encourage the child to answer their own questions.

It’s ok for your child to experience some anxiety so they learn it passes and it is bearable. Your child needs to know that feelings are ok and it is ok to say what you feel

How can I help my child? (contd)

Acknowledge your child’s anxiety.

Keep your fears to yourself as best you can. Do not minimise or laugh at your child’s fears.

Work together as parents to give a consistent message.

Don’t confuse anxiety with other types of inappropriate behaviour. Have reasonable expectations and clear limits and consequences alongside love and acceptance

PARENT TIME!!

Take care of your own Anxiety

Change expectations in time of stress

Schedule your own personal time

We tend to take care of others vs. ourselves

STOP, BREATHE, REFLECT and CHOOSE

STOP focusing on the negative and pay attention to the task at hand

RELAXATION

Further information / resources

0-19 team School Nurse / Health Visiting work with all families, children and young people offering advice and information to support the health, development and wellbeing of children and their families.

Home school link worker

Books

For professionals only:

CAMHS Professional Advisory Line 01737 287002

Further information / resources

Surrey First Steps: www.firststeps-surrey.nhs.uk

Mental Health Foundation: www.mentalhealth.org.uk

Young Minds: www.youngminds.org.uk

Phobics Society: www.phobics-society.org.uk

Get Self Help: www.getselfhelp.org.uk

Thank you for listening

QUESTIONS