“I make wise choices and reach Christ-honoring decisions and conclusions.” - GRACE Essentials Handbook, statement #61(p. 191)

Stop for a moment. Briefly assess where you might be with integrating this statement’s truth into your life.

I am just beginning to grasp this truth.

I understand what this means, but it is not a regular

part of my life.

This truth is gripping my heart and becoming a core

characteristic in my life.

Not only that, I am also helping others make this a

reality in their lives.

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© Mikael Damkier. Image from Big Stock Photo.com

Getting Started In your GRACE Essentials Handbook, turn to page 191 and read the article on “Wisdom”. Language is really a remarkable thing. Words are powerful, descriptive, and nuanced. Think for a moment about the following cluster of words that are associated with wisdom:

Knowledge

Insight Truth

Belief Understanding

Discernment Enlightenment

Perspective Intelligence

Awareness Self-awareness

Common sense

Now think about these words that are associated with the opposite of wisdom:

Error

Falsehood Ignorance

Foolish and foolishness (and stupid) Deceived

Misguided Confused

Blind Wrong

Clueless

Look back over these lists. Which list of words would you prefer to describe your life? How would you like to be seen by others – in terms of the first list or of the second list? Hopefully, this question is a no-brainer! But what about this next question: How do people actually view you? Are you perceived as a person who is generally wise . . . or as someone who is (more often than not) misguided and foolish? To get started with this topic, think of two or three people that you personally know that you would describe as WISE without any hesitation. Be sure to add your reflections on this question: Why do you see them as wise? ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________

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A Story To Be Told Their boys attended private school, their 5,000 sq. ft. home overlooking the San Bernardino valley was filled with all the latest gadgets, and their extended cab motor home was parked neatly beside the ski-boat which was placed right in front of the antique corvette by the motorcycle in the three-car garage. For years the parents’ once-strong faith had been relegated to the bottom shelf while they were caught up in what they would describe as “top-shelf living.” (I would have described it as foolish choices.) All indications were that this was a successful household; but as the old adage goes, “things are not always as they appear”. Just beneath the surface of this Southern California home were the rumblings of an emotional earthquake that would all-but-destroy the family. Dad had several affairs … mom developed multiple eating disorders … Michael was on anti-depressants at age 11 … Tomas was trying to find his way in life … and Jamie ended up dropping out of school at a stunningly young age (Junior High). The unhealthy patterns for decision-making in this household were so pervasive they could be

Unless we address the heart-issue of rebellion … we will… repeat the bad

patterns and poor choices throughout our lifetime.

a case study for any university conducting research on behavioral patterns. Mom and dad pioneered new paths of selfishness, competitively putting their own desires ahead of the best interests of the family, and repeatedly rejecting Godly counsel. How do I know? Because we were on the receiving end of the panicked phone calls each time the bill collectors came looking. Eventually they had to sell everything in order to pay outstanding debts, filed for bankruptcy, and lived in a motor home in a State Park for 9 months while they home-schooled their boys and searched for a way to start over.

Wisdom (as it is described in our GRACE Essentials Handbook) is “living a well-ordered life, following the ways of the Lord”. At many of this family’s defining moments, we offered biblical guidance for how to follow God’s way. And yet, almost without fail, they knowingly chose the opposite, and then

began wondering, “How God could allow this to happen?” when their house of cards came crumbling down. In one of my not-so-grace-filled moments, I said, “You have completely excluded God’s word and will from your choices. Why on earth do you think he owes you protection?” I have to admit, I am regularly baffled by how irresponsible people can be in connecting the dots between choices they make and the consequences they reap. God’s word seems so clear, and yet we rebelliously do what we want to do and wonder why we are not experiencing his peace. Unless we address the heart-issue of rebellion that prevents us from seeking God in our everyday choices, we will continue to repeat the bad patterns and poor choices throughout our lifetime. When this family moved out of Southern California (wrongfully thinking location was their issue) they started over a few states away and, within months, began living the same blueprint for destruction.

The ongoing stubborn nature of both parents (literally saying, “I know what God wants but I am not going to do it”) will continue to create poor choices that will echo into eternity. And unfortunately, they are imprinting their children with the same toxic processing. How sad. How tragic. How unnecessary. It could be so different if they would simply choose to live a reflective life, to learn from their mistakes and to grow toward the right direction rather than continuing to go the wrong way. Our GRACE Essentials Handbook makes it so clear: “When knowledge is joined together with faithfulness, then wisdom that chooses well is the product.” Jeremiah 6:16 states it this way: “This is what the Lord says: ‘Stand at the crossroads and look, ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls. But you said, ‘we will not walk in it’.” Wisdom is something we pray for. James 1:5 Wisdom is something we seek. Proverbs 2 Wisdom is something we choose. James 3:13

Check It Out in the Bible Who is the wisest man in the Bible? Chances are your mind quickly went to King Solomon, who gained a reputation as one of the wisest men in the world. For this lesson, you are going to read 1 Kings 3. There are two different stories in this chapter in the Bible. The first half of the chapter is the story of how Solomon sought after wisdom. The second half of the chapter is an example of Solomon using his wisdom. Read 1 Kings 3 and think about the following: � Why was Solomon so interested in

wisdom? What were some of the alternative things he could have asked God for?

� How is wisdom defined or described in this

chapter? Pay special attention to verse 9.

� This is quite important: Why do we need wisdom? What is the purpose of wisdom? For some clues, look to verses 14 and 28.

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A Closer Look As I have been writing this lesson, I have experienced some sadness. The sadness comes as I have thought about different Christians I have known over the years who have made very bad decisions that launched unwanted, painful, life-long

consequences that impact them and many others. Instead of choosing wisely, they made foolish choices.

Proverbs 14:12 tells us, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.”

Proverbs 3:5-6 remind us to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”

WHAT IS WISDOM?

Wisdom comes in many forms. In the Bible, it is presented in the form of down-to-earth practical proverbs and the refined theological reflections of the Apostle Paul. It comes to us in the form of thundering prophetic words of rebuke and in the penetrating parables and stories told by Jesus Christ (as well as many other forms). There is a cluster of words mentioned at the beginning of this lesson. While these words are closely related, they are not synonymous with one another. There are important differences of meaning. For example, there is a world of difference between knowledge and wisdom. A knowledgeable person is simply a person who has a lot of information and ideas in their head. But having knowledge is not at all the same as being a wise person. Don’t we all know really intelligent people who seem to be almost totally lacking in common sense or wisdom? While wisdom involves knowledge, it goes beyond knowledge. Something else must be added to knowledge for it to transform into what we call wisdom. Part of our difficulty has to do with the fact that the ancient Greek understanding of knowledge has influenced us much more than the ancient Hebrew understanding of wisdom. The Greeks viewed knowledge as insight and ideas that were rather abstract and theoretical. Knowledge was rationally appropriated through analysis and logic. For the Hebrew mindset, wisdom was something much more than just mental constructs of ideas held to in the mind. Wisdom was much more a way of being or a way of living in the world. It involved the entire person.

It was as much (perhaps more) a matter of the heart than it was a function of the mind. Wisdom was a comprehensive ‘WAY OF LIFE.’ For the Greeks, knowledge began, or was discovered through, the learning of academic principles of study. For the Hebrews, “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (or “the

beginning of knowledge”). Psalm 111:10 and Proverbs 1:7 use the words interchangeably. The point is that wisdom, or knowledge, comes not from the capacity to be analytical and make critical distinctions, but from a heart posture of worship and obedience. The biblical understanding of true wisdom is that such wisdom is a total way of living in the reality and presence of the One True God.

WHY DO WE NEED WISDOM? There are many reasons. For one, we need wisdom so we might live well. To live well is to know what the good life is and to orient one’s self to live by that way and seek that way. Think about this word of advice that comes from our culture about what the good life is. It is presented in the form of the “bumper sticker slogan” that we often see. “The One Who Dies With the Most Toys – Wins!” The definition of the good life and of achieving success in the good life is to die with the largest amount of “stuff.” In such a viewpoint, it seems wise to be a workaholic, an excessive spender and consumer of goods, and a miserly hoarder of what one possesses. Of course, the Bible offers a very different vision of what the good life is! The point is that wisdom is needed to even know what we should aim for in life. Then wisdom is needed to be able to make decisions that will enable us to move toward that goal. If one consistently lives for that vision and makes choices that bring such a vision closer and closer, then they are living the good life. Wisdom is also needed so we may be of maximum assistance and service to others whom we meet in life. We will all, at different times, be in the role of one who must give guidance to another. We may be in the role of teacher, counselor, confidant, parent, friend, colleague, disciple-maker, coach, mentor, guide, influencer, and so on. In those kinds of

roles, we must often give our best thoughts of perspective and guidance. As Christians, we need to be able to offer advice that is notably different and qualitatively better than what the world often offers. We do not advise others with the following:

If it feels good – do it.

You have to look out for number one.

Everyone bends the rules a little; you won’t hurt anyone by doing so.

These are, of course, silly but prominent examples of bad advice. But how often have we given unwise guidance that is dressed up in Christian language? God doesn’t want you to stay in a marriage

where you are unfulfilled!

If you were really in God’s will, you would surely not be struggling so much, so you must not be

in God’s will.

If you do these three simple things the Bible teaches you, then your problem will be solved.

If they don’t forgive you, then you don’t have to

forgive them.

God helps those who help themselves.

Etc, etc, etc. . . . . If we are indeed serious about helping others in ways that are for the greatest fruit in their lives, we must be very sure we have wisdom to offer them. The Bible also makes it very clear that without wisdom – suffering is headed our way.

For lack of guidance a nation falls. Proverbs 11:14

Plans fail for the lack of counsel.

Proverbs 15:22

Therefore, my people will go into exile for lack of understanding. Isaiah 5:13

HOW DOES ONE BECOME WISE? This is such an important question and there is so much to be loaded into a wise answer, that if

I gave you all that is involved, this lesson would become excessively long. So I’ll list a number of crucial steps with only brief comments about them.

First is the fear of the Lord. You will only become wise when you make the decision to love, worship, honor, serve, follow, and obey God. Without this foundation, nothing else will produce lasting results. (Psalm 11:10)

Second, you must be humble, open, receptive and teachable. You can only gain wisdom when you are willing to be taught wisdom. Pride, thinking you know it all, being rigid about your previously held opinions – all this works against becoming wise.

Third, you must ask for wisdom from God. God is the source of all truth and wisdom (Colossians 2:2, 3). This is called prayer. Do what Solomon did: Pray for wisdom.

(James 1:5) Fourth, you must make it a life-long practice to immerse yourself in the Bible. Read the Bible, reflect on the meaning of the Bible for your life, discover specific applications of the Bible for your life, study the Bible, memorize Scripture, discuss the Word of God with others, put yourself in situations where you can be taught

the Scriptures. (Psalm 119) Fifth, spend time with wise people and guard against foolishness that comes from associating with foolish people and absorbing foolish ideas from them. “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm”

(Proverbs 13:20) Sixth, fill your mind with substantial thoughts that come from meaningful conversations, good books, and challenging speakers. Read, reflect, study, think. After all, a Christian mind is a terrible thing to waste. We are called to

love God with all our mind. (Matthew 22:37) Seventh, be intentional about “exorcising” worldly and harmful ideas from your mind. We all have them, and as we make our way through our fallen culture, we are bombarded with falseness and foolishness. Take these thoughts captive and get rid of them. (2 Corinthians 10:5)

Eighth, create processes where you actually do something with the best ideas and insights that

grab your attention. We forget or ignore 95% of the information that comes our way. But if we pay attention to it, ponder it, consider the impact it would have on our lives, think about ways to integrate into our lives, then that truth/ insight goes much deeper into our memory, and in fact, into our way of life. To say it in a very colloquial way: USE IT OR LOSE IT. This is just as true for biblical information.

Ninth, don’t worry about what you don’t understand. There is a lot to understand about God and the things of God. You are not going to get it all at once. (Isaiah 55:8-9) Pay attention to what you are “getting a handle on.” Sit with it, work through it, make it your own.

Tenth, find a good group of friends with whom you can be a learning, growing community. Some of the most vibrant people I have ever met are life-long learners. They are just constantly seeking to grow and become all they can be in Jesus. Eleventh, remember the role of experience in all this. Some of the best learning and the most lasting wisdom is discovered in the context of experience. Life is not our teacher. Life is our provider of experiences in which we may engage in a kind of learning. It is up to us what we do with those experiences and how we come away from those experiences. (Note: Many Bible scholars believe that Ecclesiastes is the record of Solomon’s life experiences through which he learned wisdom through God.) Finally, go the distance. It is not just a matter of starting strong, but of finishing wisely and well. On a sad note, King Solomon, one of the wisest men in ancient Israel, ultimately forsook his wisdom, became foolish, and made horrible choices that were against God. Wisdom is not a once-and-for-all, once gained never lost kind of deal. It is a life long “walking in the ways of the Lord” scenario.

Live It Out This has been a longer lesson since there was so much to unpack about the meaning of wisdom. Here are some suggestions for how you can begin to grow in wisdom:

ONE: Look over the list of practical suggestions for how you can grow in your wisdom levels. Pick three or four that are most appealing to you and most in alignment with your personality. Begin to be much more intentional about those pathways. List your three top pathways to wisdom below: ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ TWO: Beginning this week, how will you use these pathways to wisdom? List ways you can begin to apply these pathways to situations in your life. ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________

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THREE: What is a difficult situation you are currently dealing with and about which you could use some wisdom? Jot down a few of your best insights about that situation. What are a few of your biggest questions or uncertainties about that situation? Who can you use as a “sounding board” to do some relational processing on this? ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________

FOUR: What was some of the “worst” advice you ever received? When and how did you learn that instead of wisdom, you were given a dose of foolishness? How did you recover from this? ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ _____________________________________ ______________________________________

WISDOM

Talk It Through There are many good questions written in the handbook and devotional. Prayerfully go through and pick out several questions that you will discuss as a group. Even if people haven’t read the devotional, there are some good, thoughtful discussion questions at the end of the devotional.

Opening activity Brainstorm on the characteristics of a wise person. How many can you come up with?

Does this intimidate or refresh you as you look at the list?

Discussion questions 1. Look up and read aloud 1 Kings 3: 9, 14, 28. (If time allows, read the whole chapter.). How

is wisdom defined? Why do we need wisdom? What is the purpose of wisdom?

2. When you need advice, to whom do you go? Why do you go to them? How did they grow to become someone you could turn to?

3. How do wisdom and teach-ability connect?

4. Consider this: the handbook talks about knowledge and wisdom going together. Through what means do you get your information? (i.e. television, radio, movies, magazine, news, internet) Are there other ways you get information? How much knowledge and wisdom do you get out of these means?

(It is not the intent here to say such things are worthless. The point is to help you discuss how many messages you are receiving and to consider the world view of these sources.)

5. Is wisdom truly about how you live and not just what you know? How? Why?