APGO Scholars 2008Conflict Resolution

Douglas W. Laube, MD, MEd

University of Wisconsin

Lea Learman, MD. PhD

University of California at San Francisco

“I really didn’t say everything I said!”

Objectives

• At the conclusion of the session, scholars will be able to:– 1. Understand your own approaches to

dealing with conflict;– 2. Assess the control styles of your opposition;– 3. Indicate how you might incorporate winning

solutions into the resolution process;– 4. Effect compromise to develop lasting

change.

Conflict ResolutionAPGO Scholars

– Introduction to Conflict Resolution

– Thomas-Kilmann Instrument

– Case studies

– Group Discussion

– Summary

Communication style

• Are men from Mars?

• Are women from Venus?

• Individual variations

• Impact of role/perceived role

– Self

– Other

Conflict Situations

The concerns of two or more parties appear to be incompatible

Conflict Management Prerequisites

Know your style

Know the other party’s style

Your Styles

Two basic dimensions

-Assertiveness - satisfy self

-Cooperativeness - satisfy

others

These styles can both be useful

Key Points

“Conflict” is not necessarily a negative word.

Resolution of conflict can center on solutions, rather than magnifying problems.

Traditional Techniques for Conflict Resolution

Conquest

Avoidance

Bargaining

Quick-fix

Role-playing

A New View of Conflict

From perceiving conflict as always being…

A disruption of order, a negative experience, an error or mistake in a relationship.

To perceiving conflict as often being…

An outgrowth of diversity that might hold possibilities for mutual growth and for improving the relationship.

A New View of Conflict

From perceiving

conflict as always

being…

A battle between

incompatible self-

interests or desires

To perceiving conflict as often being…

One part of a relationship, a part that involves needs, values, perceptions, power, goals, feelings, and so on, not just interests or desires.

A New View of Conflict

From perceiving

conflict as always

being…

An isolated event we

allow to define the

entire relationship.

To perceiving

conflict as often

being…

Occurrences that

punctuate a long-

term relationship

and that can help

clarify it.

A New View of ConflictFrom perceiving

conflict as always

being…

A struggle between

right and wrong,

good and evil.

To perceiving conflict as often being…

A confrontation between differences in certain aspects of a relationship, but not to the exclusion of other aspects that are still there to build on.

Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument

Case Studies 1-3

Four Origins of Conflict

• Selfishness

• Pride

• Insecurity

• Resentment

Six Relationship Builders

• Committed

• Considerate

• Confidential

• Candid

• Constructive

• Consistent

“You can observe a lot by watching.”

The Yogi Book, 1998