Are you Ready?Creative Assignment

Isabelle EreksonMarriage & Family

Are You Ready?Circle your responses

Strongly Disagre

e Disagre

e Undecid

ed Agree Strongly Agree

1. My father was happy in his marriage. 1 2 3 4 5

2. All things considered, my childhood years were happy. 1 2 3 4 5

3. My mother showed physical affection to me by appropriate hugging or kissing.

1 2 3 4 5

4. I feel I am a person of worth. 1 2 3 4 5

5. I avoid getting irritated or mad. 1 2 3 4 5

6. I am an outgoing person. 1 2 3 4 5

7. We understand each other’s feelings. 1 2 3 4 5

8. We sit down and just talk things over. 1 2 3 4 5

9. When we are in an argument, we recognize when we are overwhelmed and make a deliberate effort to calm down.

1 2 3 4 5

According to BYU researchers Jeffry Larson, Thomas Holman, and Robert Stahmann the higher you score on these questions the better off your relationship will be in the long run.

Are you ready?

Traits that predict marital dissatisfaction:

•Difficulty coping with stress •Dysfunctional beliefs, such as "People cannot change." •Excessive:

◦Impulsiveness ◦Anger and hostility ◦Depression ◦Irritability ◦Anxiety ◦Self-consciousness

Traits that predict marital satisfaction:

•Extroversion •Flexibility •Good self-esteem •Good interpersonal skills (such as assertiveness)

Continued…

Are you ready?

•Dissimilarity on important values, such as religion or roles in marriage •Short acquaintanceship •Premarital sex •Premarital pregnancy •Living together •Poor communication skills •Poor conflict-resolution skills and style

•Similarity of values •Long acquaintanceship •Good communication skills •Good conflict-resolutions skills and style

Continued…

Dissatisfaction: Satisfaction:

Are you ready?

•Young age (under 20) •Unhealthy family-of-origin experiences, such as •Parental divorce or chronic marital conflict •Parental or friends’ disapproval of the relationship •Pressure from others or yourself to marry •Little education and career preparation

•Older age •Healthy family-of-origin experiences •Happy parental marriage •Parental and friends’ approval of the relationship •Significant education and career preparation

Dissatisfaction: Satisfaction:

Resources

www.utahmarriage.org• Important factors to consider before taking the marriage plunge.• Forever Families.