Business Cards.

B. W. QUEEN,ATTOR NKY-AT-LAW,

Emporium, l*a.A business relating to estate,collect As,rent

estates. Orphan's Court anil general law ousinestwillreceive prompt attention. 12-ly,

J.C.JOHNSON. J. P. MONAKNK\JOHNSON & McNARNEY,

ATTORNEYS-AT-LAWEMPOHILM, PA.

Will give prompt attention to all business enrusted to them. 16-ly.

MICHAELBRENNAN,ATTORNEY-AT-LAW

Collections promptly attended to. Real estateand pension claim agent,

3S-ly. Emporium, P».

THOMAS WADDINOTON,Emporium, Pn.,

CONTRACTOR FOR MASONRY ANDSTONE-CUTTING.

Allorders in my line promptly executed. Allkinds of building and cut-atone, supplied lit lowprices. Agent for marble or granite monuments.Lettering neatly done.

AMERICAN HOUSE,East Emporium, Pa..

JOHN L. JOHNSON, Prop'r.Having resumed proprietorship ofthis old and

well established House J invite the patronage ofthe public. House newly furnished and thor-oughly renovated. 48ly

F. D. LEET.ATTORNEY-AT-LAW and INSURANCE AG'T.

EMPORIUM, PATo LANDOWNKLTS AND OTHERS IN CAMBRON AND

ADJOININGCOUNTIES.I have numerous calls for hemlock and hard-

wood timber lauds,alsostumpaKe&c., and partiesdesiring either to buy or sell willdo well to callon me. F. D. LICET.

CITY HOTEL,JWM. MCGEE, PaorßiETOh

Emporium, Pa.Having again taken possession of this old and

popularhouse I solicit a share of the public pat-ronage. The house is newly furnishedand is oneofthe bestappointed hotelsin Cameron county.

30-ly.

THE NOVELTY RESTAURANT,(Opposite Post Office,)

Emporium, Pa.WILLIAM MCDONALD, Proprietor.

I take pleasure in informing the public that ihave purchased the old and popular NoveltyRestaurant, located on Fourth street. It willbemy endeavor to serve the public in a mannerthat shall meet with their approbation. Give mea call. Meals and luncheon served at all hours.

n027-lyr Wm. McDONALD.

BT. CHARLES HOTEL,THOS. J. LYSETT, PROPRIETOR

Near Buffalo Depot, Emporium, Pa.This new and commodious hotel is now opened

forthe accommodation ofthe public. NewinalIts appointments, every attention willbe paid to.the guests patronizing this notei. '27-17 ly

MAY GOULD,TEACHER OF

PIANO, HARMONY AND THEORY,Also dealer in all the Popular Sheet Music,

Emporium, Pa.Scholars taught either at my home on Sixth

street or at the homes ofthe pupils. Outoftownscholars willbe given dates at my rooms in thisplace.

F. (J. RIECK, I). D. S?BTP DENTIST.; J

Office over Taggart's Drug Store, Emporium, Pa.X Gas and other local anaesthetics ad-

TwsSSmiuistered for the painless extraction«ZHHJof teeth.

SPEClALTY:?Preservation of natural teeth, in-cluding Crown and Bridge Work.

S The Plate to Buy Cheap /

PARSONS. ?

jjj GROCERIES. |J. A. KINSLER,

[}: Carries nothing but the best that can be if]obtained in the line of ![\u25a0

$ Groceries and ?5jS Provisions,jfl n)

[n Flour, Salt and Smoked Meats, jf|nj Canned Goods, etc.

n] Teas, Coffees, Fruits, Confectionery, [=[n Tobacco and Cigars. if]

[X Goods Delivered Free any place In 2]n] Town. yj

Jjj Call and see me and get prices. ujCj J. A. KINSLER,Ol Near P. &E. Depot. in

asHsHsasasHS asasasHs

I" S. E. MURRY,|PRACTICAL J

PLUMBER, GAS \AND I

I STEAM FITTER. || I have recently added an || entirely new line of JZ Plumbing Goods to my-|k already large stock. I a| handle andjkeep constant- 1ly

ly in stock |N GAS AND

STEAM FITTINGS,SEWER PIPES, |

I GAS STOVES, ETC. || My store room is well sup- |g plied with Bath'l Tubs, H0 Wash Stands, Gas|Lamps 1jsj and anything required in 1|J my trade. Contracts IU taken for all lines of work; |W satisfaction guaranteed. |SH Write me when you have0 any work in my line,jjp Out of town orders promptly |jQ attended to. |

fj S. E. MURRY.

\u25baD HVSIItBT6 TRADEE-MARKS 1rAltni o ANDsr :

\u25ba ADVICE AS TO PATENTABILITY <\u25ba Notice in "

Inventive Age " HU BQ Bi <\u25ba Book "How to obtain Patents" g Blfalnß 4*

Charge* moderate. No fee tillpatent is Bccured. 4

Letters strictly confidential. Addr<B3,v E. G. SIOGERS, Patent Lawyer, Washington, D. C. 4

AFTER THF. BATTLESome are found bleeding and

sore, while others have a fitof tlie blues. Now if thereshould be any so unfortunateas to suffer from the eflecte ofaccidents we have the Balmfor their pains and aches,let itbe either for man or beast.

Our liniment and powdersforhorses or cattle are alwaysthe best.

Our medicines are pure and_ always get there. The prices

are right too.our patent medicine depart-

ment is supplied with all thestandard remedies and we can

supply your on short notice.Our toilet and fancy goods

department we keep up tothe times.

Our Prescription depart-ment receives our closest at-tention and all calls answeredday or night. Juet touch thebutton. In fact we are hereto do business and serve thepublic

M. - A. - ROCKWELL,THE PHARMACIST,

s V v X \ V \ N N V\\\/

> THE FAIR STORE |Extraordinary

t Inducements and %.'/ Special prices in

< Ladies''

Tailor-Made Suits |/ A fine line to select from. j||% LADIES ' SHIRT WAISTS. SKIRTS 7

R AND HOSIERY AT BARGAINS. %£

Laee Curtains and Window Shades, afull line. \u25a0/.

/ LADIES'SUMMER UNDERWEAR. \'i WASH SUITS IN LAWN, |*

DIMITIES AND PERCALE. %§ %.J Special bargains in;WRAPPERS.

LADIES' SUMMER SHAWLS. JCorrect and latest in Belts. All at K

y,, popular prices.v Silverware. Chinaware, Glassware,? Agateware, Tinware and a thousand and jfy one other Novelties. gj

All popular and Guaranteed makes of |jBicycles. EiKht

Kindß . |< %/ ii H. A. ZARPS & CO.<1 /

\ \ V \ \.\ \

5 r. X. BLti/nbE, II =::,=====s*> (?

J Emporium, Pa. ?)

0j

?J Bottler and Dealer In r«I?)

% beer, »

% i1 WINES, ifT f>r| WHISKIES (?

(? §(? And Liquorß.of all Kinds.?) ?><? (?

GGs i ®

2 (??> A

The best of go>ods always carried ?

in stock and everything ?)

<? warranted as rep- %J] resented.(Tg sc* Special Attention Paid to £

?) Mail Orders. %?) - s% ~, I% I1 EMPORIUM, PA. I

J

J. A. Fisher,PRACTICAL

florse »

Sboer,Broad Street, Emporiußi, Pa.

cj SSOO ?

Iri The above Reward will be paid tri[|-j for information that will lead to the [=112, arrest and conviction of the party f{]pi or parties who placed iron and slabs ir

on the track of the Emporium & [)?[n Rich Valley R. R., near the east n]ril line of Franklin Housler's farm, on Ln"] the even ng of Nov* 21st, 1891. [}jIn Henry Auchu, }{]

ru 88-tf President, m'

CAMERON' COUNTY PRESS, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 1901.

it PIMIMIRepresentative Newspapers De-

nounce Yellow Journalism.

THEY ENCOURAGED ANARCHY

Hearst and Wanamaker Yellow Sheets

Come In For Their Full Share of

Condemnation In the Comment Upon

the Assassination of the President

of the United States.

Throughout the United States the re-spectable conservative newspapers areroundly scoring yellow journalism andcoupled with the Hearst New YorkJournal, the Wanamaker North Amer-ican, with its Emma Goldman protec-tion record, comes In for a full shamof denunciation.

Following are a few editorial utter-ances on this subject:

MORE THAN CONDEMNATION.We are the only civilized people

among whom the yellow journal exists.It could not live amid a European peo-ple. Its gross indecency would shockthe public sense, so that room wouldnot be found for It. The Americanpeople would show a distinct advanceby withholding from these sheets pat-ronage and recognition.?lndianapolisNews.

DOES NOT IMPLY LICENSE.It will be of no service to punish

Czolgosz while Emma Goldman goesabout the country instigating freshassassinations and groups of anarchistsopenly meet to celebrate the crimeagainst humanity. Such meetings, suchteachings, are themselves a crime, andshould be so recognized and treatedby stringent penalties. Freedom ofspeech does not imply license to un-dermine the structure of society, andcivilization must protect itself. ?Brad-ford (Pa.) Argus.YELLOW JOURNALISM AND AN-

ARCHY.Little less deep than the indignation

against the assassin Czolgosz in the de-nunciation of the newspapers of theyellow Journal class, which, with theirtirades against the heads of govern-ments and specious reasonings, havedeluded such men as the attacker ofthe President to deeds of violence. ItIs the cry of "murderer" which thesescurrilous sheets have printed on ac-count of the wars with Spain and inthe Philippines against the Presidentthat have inflamed the poor under-standing of men who lack the powerof discernment to distinguish betweenreason and madness and have sentthese vultures upon law and order totake from the head of government theirchief officer. ?Towanda (Pa.) Report-er Journal.PREACH MURDER AND ASSASSI-

NATION.Would the bloodthirsty men and

women who, while living in a civilizedcommunity, preach murder and assass-

ination as a remedy for political evils,put their ideas into practice and killone another off, or would their novelImprisonment awaken them to the er-ror of their ways and resolve them Intopeaceable and useful citizens? Evi-dently there is to be no lack of sugges-tions for dealing with the followers ofHerr Most and Emma Goldman, andIt will be surprising indeed ifour law-makers do not manage to evolve some-thing really practical out of the mul-titude of Ideas.?Plttston Gazette.

PUT HER IN A CAGE.Emma Goldman, anarchy's angel

with the flaming sword, who, it is al-leged, inspired President McKinley'sassassin to commit his foul deed, isIn the toils of the police. It Is sug-gested that Miss Goldman be trans-ferred to Philadelphia and placed onexhibition in a cage in front of thePhiladelphia sensational newspaperwhich so eloquently championed herrights when she was prevented fromholding anarchistic meetings severalmonths ago.?Bucks County Gazette.

CLAIMS TO BE RESPECTABLE.A Philadelphia newspaper which

claims to be respectable speaks ofEmma Goldman as "the representativeof the American right to free speech,"and "there is no law in the UnitedStates against preaching the gospel ofanarchy." There Is the law of self-preservation which every governmentmay enforcs. ?The Indianapolis Jour-nal.THE YELLOWS ARE CRAWLING.The Philadelphia Inquirer has cer-

tainly performed a great service by Itsprompt. Incisive and crushing Indict-ment of the New York Journal and theWanamaker yellow pest. We certainlynote a remarkable "crawling" on thepart of the Journals In question anda hurried desire to get In out of thewet. But, as The Inquirer so graphi-cally pointed out, their fell work hasbeen done, their poison has been castbroadcast and the Nation's head hashad to bear the blunt of this gospelof hate and slander. Now that theyhave been properly gibbetted we hopethe public will mark Its disapprovalof such publications. We do not forget

how the North American libeled thecoal regions by Its outrageous descrip-tions and absurd pictures during theminers' strike last fall.?WllkesbarreTimes.NOW SORRY THAT THEY SPOKE.

Yellow journalism and anarchy arenot far apart. The awful crime com-mitted In Buffalo last Friday was com-mitted by a disciple of Emma Goldman.Not long ago, It will be recalled, sheattempted to speak In Philadelphia, butthe mayor and the director of publicsafety prevented her from so doing,immediately yellow Journalism rushedto her rescue, and WonjunaJtcr's iVortn

. r.u»ncan gave utterance to tne follow-

ing, among other jointed remarks in

criticism of the officials for her sup-

pression: "The silencing of EmmaGoldman is an outrage." "The exampleof lawlessness being given by the.police

authorities is at once dangerous anddisgraceful. Should force be met withforce the moral responsibility wouldrest upon the stupid despots of theCity Hall."

The above la disgraceful reading; Itshould cause Americans to blush forshame. Emma Goldman, in Cleveland,spoke the words which fired the brainof a young man to attempt the life ofour President. Had the officials ofCleveland acted with equal decisionand prudence with those of Philadel-phia, the crime would not have beenenacted. One result of the attempted

assassination of the President will beto make yellow journalism more ab-horrent than ever, and our lawmakersshould not lose sight of this dangerouselement In society when dealing withanarchy and its attendant evils. ?Ve-nango Citizen-Press.

CRIMINAL AS ANARCHISTS.Emma Goldman and her nefarious

principles are responsible for Czol-gosz's determination to kill PresidentMcKinley. They inflamed his mindand they formed his devilish ambition.Emma Goldman was hailed as theapostle of free speech by the Phila-delphia North American. That a news-

paper which professes to stand forreform and right living and honestpurposes should boldly defend one ofthe most dangerous anarchists in thecountry and should denounce thosewho prevented her from uttering hertreasonable, un-American doctrineswould be almost incomprehensible were

It not already known that it has neverhad a mission save the vilification ofthe men it disliked for personal orpolitical reasons and that Its wholepolicy was dictated by the erratic in-clinations cf a few disappointed anddisgruntled office-seekers.? Blue RidgeZephyr, Waynesboro, Pa.

YELLOW PERIL AND A CURE.The Journal has had no hesitation

in pointing out where the real respon-sibility rests for the crime against thePresident. The yellow and irresponsi-ble press of the country, by their de-grading and malicious attacks on pub-lic officers and men in high places,have fostered discontent, have pro-moted anarchy, and made possible just

such crimes.?Chicago Journal.THE YELLOW PRESS.

Another instance Is called to mind inPhiladelphia where another yellow

paper was champion of Emma Goldmanwhen the murderous she-wolf had ar-ranged to deliver a harangue in thatcity. The police authorities interfered,and the paper referred to said: "Theexample of lawlessness being given bythe police authorities is at once dan-gerous and disgraceful. Should forcebe met by force, the moral responsi-bility would rest upon the stupid des-pots of the City Hall. The law shouldbe brought to bear upon the lawlessmayor and director of public safety."The yellow newspaper made the rightof Emma Goldman to stand up beforea crowd and incite to assassinationgreater than the right of the authori-ties, constituted by the people, t.o pre-serve public peace, order and humanlife. On the same occasion EmmaGoldman complained that the constitu-tion of the United States had beenviolated because she could not lashsome Czolgosz in the crowd into shoot-ing the President as he stood extend-ing his hand to his fellow citizens.Such is the interpretation of the na-tional constitution by the fiend whois worse than Borgia, and the yellowpapers that flock to her support.?St.Louis Globe.EMMA GOLDMAN WHO PREACHED

MURDER.Emma Ooldman, the leading anar-

chist of the country Ifnot of the world,stands charged with conspiracy tomurder the President of the UnitedStates, and it is the duty of officersof the law to discover every scrap ofevidence that will tend to prove thisand to present it to a Jury. Thiswoman has stalked about the countrybreathing threats of venge- nee on allmen in authority. She has outdonethe anti-"lmperiallsts" and the yellowjournals. She has preached murderand arson, and she preached It to Czol-gosz, and h« acted on her advice. Hedid as she told him and she is a thou-sand times more responsible than thepoor, miserable wretch who is shudder-ing in**, cell in Buffalo. We respectwomen and we would not suggest harshtreatment?but this woman is not likeothers; she is a flend in human shape.Sho lias murder In her heart and mur-der on her tongue. She preaches mur-der and glories In blood.- Springfield

Union.NO QUESTION ABOUT IT.

There can be no question about it,the sensational newspapers mustshare in the responsibility for thePresident's assassination. They maysquirm and hiss, hiding their shame Ineditorial comments and cartoons of asympathetic character, but at last they 'stand exposed before the world of the Iterrible sin of having encouraged law-lessness and murder by deliberatemisrepresentation and vicious exag-geration.?New Haven Register.

NORTH AMERICAN MUST ANSWERThe Philadelphia North American

must answer the grave charge of aid-ing and abetting Anarchy, the directcause of the attempt on President Mc-Kinley's life. In the early part of Sep-

tember last, this Journal induced Em-ma Goldman, the high priestess .ofanarchy, to come to Philadelphia aijjiaddress a meeting there. It is saidthe representatives of this paper smug-gled the woman Into a secret meeting,where she made her address. In ad- iditlon, they used the refusal of the

police to permit Anarchy td be preach-

an a means of viciously attacking112 .mayor and city administration,c g the woman had the right tofi "where.

"Tnw anempted assassin of the Pres-ident confesses that his act was in-spired by the Inflammatory speechesof this woman. In the upholding ofher hideous cause, The North Ameri-can cannot but be more or less re-sponsible for the fruits of her ef-forts. The fearful results attained areon a line with the Intemperate, vi-cious and untrustworthy character ofthis journal's teachings. While pro-

fessing to champion the cause of re-form, It has been worse than criminalItself.?West Grove, Chester Co., Inde-pendent.

YELLOW JOURNALISM'S BLAME.To the yellow journalism that has

persistently villifled, misrepresentedand abused the President is mainly

due the crime at Buffalo, and it Isup to the reputable, honorable portion

of the American people to say howlong that vile and malicious and crim-inal inciting of murder shall continue.The President ignored It and trustedthe people, but he could not make al-lowance for the human wolf, the hu-man rattlesnake, the human maddog lying in wait for him here andthere and ready to strike when oppor-tunity offered. These deadly elementsexist in society and, inflamed by thevile and murderous journals, whichegg them out, they do their work, andthe crime of last Friday is the firstfruits of that unrestrained and mur-derous poison poured daily out amongthe people for the gain of nominallydecent men whose money is soaked Inthe blood of the best and bravest inthe land. Cause and effect are plain

and unmistakably seen in this mat-ter, and the murder-makers of yellowjournalism are back of the Anarchist,the crank and the crazed assassin whofollows logically the prompting of theirpolitical abuse. ?Bridgeport Standard.

CANNOT BE TOLERATED.Relentlessly, indecently, outrageous-

ly the yellow journals have denouncedevery man in public life and havesought to increase circulation by thecruellest and most indecent cartoons,supplemented by red ink head lines,editorial vituperation and persistent,

constant effort to array mass againstclass and arouse the worst passionsof mankind. The time has come whenthis kind of journalism can no longer

be safely tolerated, when the goodname of this nation demands that suchdebauchery of public principle bestopped, and stopped forever. ?NewHaven Leader.

G. A. R. MEN ACT.

Colonel Fred Taylor Post Adopts Reso-lutions Denouncing Yellow

Journalism.Colonel Fred Taylor Post, G. A. R.,

of Philadelphia, has adopted resolu-tions which set forth:

"The comrades of Colonel Fred Tay-lor Post, No. 19, Grand Army of theRepublic, record the fact that we deep-ly deplore and detest all such teach-ings and utterances that lead weak-minded and misguided creatures todeeds of assassination, and we standpledged to help, aid and assist lawfulauthority, to the fullest extent of ourpower, in putting a summary endingto such treasonable utterances, wheth-er made by Anarchists, Nihilists, So-cialists, political leaders or editors ofvicious and dangerous papers and mag-

azines."We also enter upon record that we

deplore and denounce the publicationof the offensive and diabolical car-

toons that appear in the most con-spicuous places in sensational andunscrupulous newspapers. Inflamingthe minds of men and women to das-tardly thoughts and deeds, arid. In theInterest of American law, order, peace,government and decency, we recom-

mend the passage of the severest lawsagainst all such pernicious journalism.

"And we also enter upon record ourapproval of the action of the mayor ofPhiladelphia and his director of publicsafety In resolutely prohibiting quiterecently the Anarohtstic agitator, Em-ma Goldman, from publicly promulgat-ing in this city her infamous doctrinesof treason to the state and nation?-doctrines which lead to the assassina-tion of those high in authority, andfor no other reason than that they

are the legally chosen representativesof law, order, peace and government."

The Flnlunders.No northern people are hardier or

more spirited than the FlnlanJers.with their clear complexions and darkblue eyes. In spite of their harsh cli-mate they have the most healthful liv-ing of perhaps any of the northernraces and keep equal degrees of ro-mance, daring and good feeling In theirnatures. You do not find imagination,force and adventure In a race withoutcoarse, plenteous fare, pure air andcleanliness.

Hla Only Request.

It happened once that a faithful Mos-lem married, but when he saw hiswife she proved to be very unprepos-sessing. Some days after the marriage

his wife said to him, "My dove, as youhave many relatives, I wish you wouldlot me know before whom I may un-veil." "My gaaselle," he replied, "ifthou wilt only hide thy face from me Ieare not to whom thou showest it."

Extremes.Mrs. Crawford?So you haven't found

the course of lectures on cooking youattended to be of much practical use?

Mrs. Crabshaw?No, my dear. Theyeither told you how to prepare terrapinand canvasback or else how to lire on35 cents a day.?Life.

Japan Is the largest consumer of riceIn the world, the average being 300pounds n person a year. The Ameri-cans use but four pounds per capita.

A Mtile am ? ttfe Haver.

The mine mule known it th-tog or twoQuite as well as does the army mule.In one of the mines In the Pittsburgdistrict tht ever patient mule provedhimself possessed of an almost humansense of coming danger. One morning

when the full shift was at work thereoccurred an unusual thing. The aircurrents had seemed defective, andthere was a restless f««)>9g among theminers, something like the uneasinessof fove stock before e storm. A fewflays previous a chamber had beenclosed on account of gas, and the menwere Instinctively thinking of whatthat might mean. Suddenly there wasa clatter of hoofs, and a mule appear-ed. Its long ears were quivering, andIts intelligent eyes were full "of terror.

It gave n shrill bray and then wasgone down the entry, broken traces fly-ing after It. The men looked at oneanother, and then the feverishness ofthe air moved them w 'h one impulse.Dropping picks, they » 1 precipitately,making a headlong dash through thelabyrinth for the open air. With scaredfaces other miners joined them, andwhile they were wondering what itall meant a dull, deep explosion wentrumbling through the hollow back ofthem, followed by wave upon wave ofnoxious vapors. Then they understood.When the bodies of the few poor menwho had been hopelessly entrappedwere recovered, another was tenderlycarried out with theirs?that of the lit-tle gray mule that sounded the warn-ing.? Leslie's Weekly.

Serpent Wornhlp.Itwas probably in the character of a

healer that the serpent was regardedby the Milesians, siuce most of the lo-calities of Ireland connected with tra-ditions of these reptiles destroyed bySt. Patrick were esteemed places ofhealing. To these spots, generally holywells, the people of the poor and igno-rant classes still resort as pious pil-grims taking relief from their infirmi-ties. They drink of the sacred watersand circle about the fount on theirknees while repeating their prayers,and it is a curious fact, as we are in-formed by an old time traveler In Ire-land, that this circling was formerlydone "groveling on hands and knees oreven lying flat on the ground and wrig-gling like a snake." This must un-doubtedly have been a relic of the an-cient rites, though the people had notthe slightest idea of its origin or eventhat such a religion had ever existedon their island.

In the same way they still on Bel-tane eve (Bel-tinne, or Bel's fire) kindle"bale tires" on the summit of everyhill and send flaming wheels rollingdown their sides, though ignorant thatthey are celebrating a day consecratedto Bel, or Baal, by their Phoenician andIrish ancestors, who observed it in aprecisely similar manner.?New Lippin-cott.

Rcqnlrcmenta of n Good Stroke Our.During practice a good stroke is one

who is regular in his rowing and easyto follow. lie must give the big menplenty of time to finish the stroke out.lie must keep them swinging steadily,and In a trial over the whole or anyportion of the course he must get ev-ery possible ounce of work out of them,so that they are completely rowed outwithout having got short or flurried onthe way. In a race he must know thecapabilities of his crew and must beable to feel how they are going, whenthey want easing off and when theyare capable of higher pressure, whileabove all he must have that degree ofgeneralship which will enable him todecide in a well contested race whento put the pressure on in order to takethe advantage of station at a certainpoint of the course, when to ease offIf he is holding his opponent at aslower rate of stroke, how far It isnecessary for him to save himself foran effort at the end and especially ina really close contest the exact mo-ment at which he Should make tho"grande attaque."?Saturday Review.

They Were All Tired.The parlor entertainer has some amus-

ing experiences, although he Is not al-ways good natured enough to tell themagainst himself. One who appreciatesa Joke, however, relates that on a cer-tain occasion he had been performingat an "at home" and responding to so

many encores that the programme be-came unusually long.

After Itwas over his hostess with heryoung daughter came up to him and,after congratulating him on the successof the afternoon, said most cordially:

"Oh, Mr. Blank, come and have somerefreshments and sit down for awhile.Iknow you must be awfully tired."

"Yes," chimed In tho sweet youngdaughter, with the best intentions inthe world; "I'm sure we are."?NewYork Mall and Express.

A French Novel.

lon?l adore herlNarcisse?l Idolize her!"Ha, then we are rivals!""Yes, but still friends!""Aye, friends till death P"Let us tell her!"They tell her.She says:

#"Let us die!"

'

Jfhey buy 0 centimes' worth of char-coal.

They Ignite It.They Inhale It.They all die.Vive l'amour!?J. C. Goddard's "A

Leave of Absence."

lllnntratliiKHl* Subject."No, you can't see Mr. Blankblank

this morning during oflJce hours.""But lie'R a public official, isn't he?""Yes, and he's engaged In the public

lervlee.""May I ask what he's doing?""He's writing a magazine article on

How Can We Improve the Officehold-Vs Neglectful Treatment of the Pub-ic?' "?Cleveland Plain Dealer.