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Care for the Caregiver: The Need and the
Reality
Caring for an ailing loved one can lead to increases in
stress, anxiety, and depression. It can also be
incredibly rewarding
• More than 50 million Americans care for a family member or friend with a chronic illness, disability, or advanced age during any given year (National Family Caregivers Association, 2000).
• Caregiving costs $306 billion annually (NIH, 2000)
• Caregivers are at greater risk of illness and/or death (JAMA)
Signs that caregiving may be becoming
too risky(adapted from caregiverstress.com)
• Missing or delaying own doctor’s appointments
• Ignoring own health problems or symptoms• Not eating a healthy diet • Overusing tobacco or alcohol to deal with
stress
• Giving up exercise habits• Losing sleep• Losing connections with friends• Bottling up feelings of anger and frustration• Feeling sad, down, depressed, or hopeless
much of the time• Loss of energy• Loss of interest in things that used to give
pleasure
• Blaming ill person for the situation• Feeling that people ask more than they should• Feeling like caregiving has affected family
relationships in a negative way• Feeling annoyed that others don’t help out• Feeling annoyed that others criticize
caregiving• Feeling resentful towards ill person
CAREGIVER STRESS SELF-ASSESSMENT
“If you don’t take care of yourself, you will never be able to continue taking care of your loved one. This means eating right, getting adequate rest, building exercise into your schedule, and keeping up with your own medical appointments.” (caregiverstress.com)
Ways to avoid and manage caregiver stress
(adapted from caregiverstress.com)
• Work out• Meditate• Ask for help (even of ill person)• Take a break
• Indulge – massage ,manicure, etc.• Find support• Laugh • Eat well• Take care of yourself• Adult day care• Respite care• Challenge irrational thoughts
Irrational beliefs – albert ellis
• It is a dire necessity for adult humans to be loved or approved by virtually every significant other person in their community.
• One absolutely must be competent, adequate and achieving in all important respects
or else one is an inadequate, worthless person.
• People absolutely must act considerately and fairly and they are damnable villains if
they do not. They are their bad acts.• Emotional disturbance is mainly externally
caused and people have little or no ability to increase or decrease their dysfunctional feelings and behaviors.
• It is awful and terrible when things are not the way one would very much like them to
be.• If something is or may be dangerous or
fearsome, then one should be constantly and excessively concerned about it and should keep dwelling on the possibility of it occurring.
• One cannot and must not face life's responsibilities and difficulties; it is easier to avoid them.
• One's past history is an all-important determiner of one's present behavior and because something once strongly affected one's life, it should indefinitely have a similar effect.
• One must be quite dependent on others and need them and one cannot mainly run one's own life.
• Other people's disturbances are horrible andone must feel upset about them.
• There is invariably a right, precise and perfectsolution to human problems and it is
awful if this perfect solution is not found.
Rational emotive behavior therapy
• A – activating event or potentially stressful situation
• B – beliefs, thoughts, or perceptions about A• C – emotional consequence that results from
holding these beliefs
• A potentially stressful situation + your perceptions = your stress level
Caregiving example
SELF CARE
Prevention and Management of Burnout
Stages of Burnout
Prevention of Burnout
HOW MANY HOURS IN A WEEK?
SLEEP MEALS COMMUTING ERRANDS FAMILY TIME
GROOMING CAREGIVING RECREATION
MAINTAINING RECORDS MEETINGS
UPGRADING SKILLS COMMUNITY SERVICE
SPIRITUAL/RELIGIOUS PRACTICES
SETTING PRIORITIES
• WORK• FAMILY• FRIENDS• COMMUNITY• SPIRITUAL/RELIGIOUS• RELAXATION• HEALTH
WORK PRIORITIES
• COMPETENCE• TRAINING• PROMOTION• RECOGNITION• INCOME
FAMILY PRIORITIES
•NURTURE RELATIONSHIPS•TIME WITH PARTNER•TIME WITH CHILDREN•RESOLVE CONFLICTS•HAVE FUN TOGETHER
FRIENDSHIP PRIORITIES
•DEEPEN RELATIONSHIPS•SPEND TIME TOGETHER•PARTY
COMMUNITY PRIORITIES
•VOLUNTEER ACTIVITIES•CLEAN-UP CAMPAIGNS•SPECIFIC CAUSES
SPIRITUAL/RELIGIOUS PRIORITIES
•DEEPEN SPIRITUAL LIFE
•FELLOWSHIP WITH OTHERS
•PRAYER•MEDITATION•STUDY•BALANCE
RELAXATION PRIORITIES
•VACATION
•MASSAGE
•PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
•HANG OUT
HEALTH PRIORITIES
•EATING HABITS
•SLEEPING HABITS
•EXERCISE
•PHYSICAL RENEWAL
•MENTAL/EMOTIONAL RENEWAL
PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
GOAL SETTING: WHAT DO I WANT AND WHY DO I WANT IT?
•When the WHY gets stronger, the HOW gets easier
•Goals need to be specific, doable, and measurable
GOAL SETTING
GOALREASON
Objective #1Objective #2Objective #3
Example:• Improve health in order
to have more energy– Exercise 30 minutes 4
times/week– Lose 1.5 pounds/week
for a total of 25 pounds– Eat 1800-2000
calories/day
GOAL SETTING – do it yourself
SUCCESS QUESTION
WHAT CAN I DO TODAY THAT WILL HELP ME TOWARDS MY GOAL?
What can I do for exercise today?What can I do today to enhance my
relationship with my partner?What can I do today to nurture myself?
Self-Care Exercise
• Make a list of at least 20 things you enjoy• Put $ next to those that cost less than $10• Put “A” for those you prefer to do alone• Put “T” for those you prefer to do together with
someone• Put “B” for those that you enjoy equally alone or
together• Put 15 for those you can do in 15 minutes or less• Put an asterisk by those that have a $,15,and A
Self-Care Contract
• Pair up – share lists• Develop contract for what you will do to have
fun during the next week• Is it specific?• Measurable?• Doable?• Select someone in your life with whom to be
accountable