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629 Clifton Ave Clifton
973-777-7364459 Chestnut St U
nion
908-686-5868
DEN
TAL C
AR
E FOR
CO
WA
RD
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THE A
PP
REH
ENS
IVE PATIEN
T
DEN
TIS
TR
Y W
HILE Y
OU
SLEEP
PO
LLER D
ENTA
L GR
OU
P
470 Clifton Ave Clifton
973-546-6977
EXP 3-15-12
EXP 3-15-12
EXP 3-15-12 M
y Mow
imy
Po P
olsku(D
entystka)
Follo
w The A
pprehensive P
atient of Clifton and
Poller D
ental Group
on
Smile
Makeove
rFor as low
as $119 per month
you can have a new sm
ile$119 per m
onth based on credit approval and 60 month
financing through GE capital for a total of $5,000.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 3
It was a prime location that Henry Fette,
founder of Fette Ford, was interested in buying
for his growing car dealership back in the
Sixties. Started in 1952, on Main and Madison
Avenues, Fette soon moved to the Allwood
Circle. As the business grew, Fette knew that
he would need more space to display an
ever-expanding line of cars.
He and son Larry started looking around
for appropriate space. On an impulse one
day, the senior Fette called the owners of
the landmark bowling lanes, Bowlero,
asking them if they wanted to sell the
property, at the intersection of Routes 3
and 46. The deal was made soon
enough and the Fettes got to work to
build their dream dealership.
Since that time, the building has
been renovated and in 2012, anoth-
er addition is underway to accom-
modate the popular Infiniti line up.
Third generation owner John
Fette said he and his family are
proud to grow with and invest in
Clifton... their hometown.
February 2012 Clifton Merchant4
WeProudlyAnnounceourSeptemberAwardWinners...
WeProudlyAnnounceourOctoberAwardWinners...
WeProudlyAnnounceourNovemberAwardWinners...
WeProudlyAnnounceourDecemberAwardWinners...
Kenneth Hauser
Top SalesMary JeanCetinich
Weichert Pride
Ellen Weiner
Top ProducerAlma Billings
Agent of the Month
Kathleen Perow
Top Lister
Hilda Ferro
Top SalesThaddeus Joe
Hunter
Weichert Pride
Hilda Ferro
Top ProducerTania Hernandez
Faria
Agent of the Month
Daniel Dan Brozyna
Top Lister
Gregorio GregManalo
Top Sales
Marianna Gozdz
Weichert PrideElena Schwartz
Top ProducerDaniel
Dan Brozyna
Agent of the Month
Alma Billings
Top Lister
Mary JeanCetinich
Top Sales
Jayne Urgo
Weichert PrideDonna Freeswick
Top ProducerLesia Wirstiuk
Agent of the Month
Alma Billings
Top Lister
Clifton Merchant February 2012 5
16,000 Magazines
are distributed tohundreds of Clifton
Merchants on the firstFriday of every month.
Subscribe Page 8
$27 per year $45 for 2 years
Call 973-253-4400
Editor & PublisherTom Hawrylko
Business ManagerCheryl Hawrylko
Graphic DesignerKen Peterson
Staff WriterJoe Hawrylko
Contributing WritersIrene Jarosewich, CarolLeonard, Rich DeLotto,Don Lotz, Jack DeVries 2012 Tomahawk Promotions
1288 Main AvenueDowntown Clifton, NJ 07011
From the Editor
This months cover features Jerryand Jane Declet, a warming taleabout a couple whose first 19months together were spent bywriting thousands of love letterswhile Jerry was abroad. Theirson, Jerry, who tipped us offabout his parents tale ofromance, has a romantic story ofhis own. Four years ago, he met
Amanda, then a coworker at theNewark Port. The two went on adate and immediately hit it off,bonding over their love of sports.But really it was much more thanthat. It was her wholedemeanor. Shes just a greatlady, he said. Jerry found the girl that he could have a life long
relationship with, just like the marriage his parentshave and whom he admires so much. My parents,theyre like an old time romantic movie, he said.Even after 43 years, theyre still in love. Amandahad always said that she wanted to be engaged by
30, and on the eve of her birthday, at her parentshouse with family all around, Jerry pulled her asidejust before midnight and proposed. It was great,he happily recalled. The two were wed on March26, 2010, and now reside in Dutch Hill. On the following pages, youll find more tales of
romance featuring your Clifton neighbors.
Its all about Love...Jerry, Jr. & Amanda Declet
February 2012 Clifton Merchant6
Community Comments
Ed MacDonald and his wife, Izzy, haveaspecialwaythattheyvecelebratedValentinesDayforthepast15
years.Itsa traditionforus. Everyyear,shepostsa
question for the familywhat do you love most
aboutyourfamily,whatisyourbestmemoryfrom
childhood, he said. She puts it all on heart
shapedpaperandputsitinaheartshapedbas-
ketonthekitchentableandthenshesavesit.
Theactualdinnerisalsofestive.
The traditional meal is meatloaf, cut into
heartshapedportions.Thereisalsothesalad,
whichfeaturesheartshapedcucumbers.
The drink of choice is 7-Upwith red food
coloring.
Shesbeenmakingmeatloaf, redmashpota-
toesandallthatforawhilenow,butherideaabout
making notes together came up about 15 years ago,
saidMacDonald. Itseemslike
the boys and I have ulterior
motives to see who can make
mommie cry first. Shes very
soft. She likes to hear all nice
stuffaboutherfamily.Wearea
veryclosefamily.
Ourlifeisourfamily.Thatis
what our life is all about, he
said.Asfarasromance,wejust
havethatintheeverydayhustle
and bustle of life. Its just that
little peck on the cheek or the
hug while youre washing the
dishesthats what I live for.
Thatsthebeautifulnessofatight
family.
Ed and Izzy MacDonald with their children Jeremy and Rory froma recent Christmas. Pictured below is Izzys love salad.
Family, Food & Love at The MacDonalds
What are you doing for
Valentines Day?
Clifton Merchant February 2012 7
Bill belongs to the Union League Club in New York, and weusually go there on Tuesdays so maybe well do that, musedBarbara. She and her husband Bill, the noted land use attorney who
grew up in Botany, celebrated their 48th wedding anniver-sary on Jan. 18.The couple, who still work together at their Parker Ave.
storefront office, have two children and four grandkids. Pressed on their plans for Valentines Day, Barbara
laughed: When youre married to the same man for 48years, you dont tend to plan anything extraordinary. Nonetheless, the couple, almost six decades later, seems to
have a good partnership as they can often be seen, socializ-ing or dining around town together. How did they meet?In Newark, where I grew up. We dated for eight years
first, she recalled, adding to the legal 48. Billy was goingto school there. He always tells me that he promised to getme out of Newark. Sure, she says dryly, adding:but into Botany Village?
48 plus 8 for Barbara & Bill Sala
February 2012 Clifton Merchant8
Community Comments
Name: __________________________________________________________________________Address: ________________________________________________________________________City: _______________________________________State:____________________________________Zip:______________________Phone:_____________________________________________Email:________________________________________________________________________PLEASE MAKE CHECKS TO TOMAHAWK PROMOTIONS, 1288 MAIN AVE., CLIFTON, NJ 07011
Have Clifton Merchant Mailed.$27/YEAR SUBSCRIPTIONSorrybutduetoproblemswithBulkMailDeliverywenolongeroffera$16rateforCliftonSubscribers.
Come Valentines Day, Bob andCathy Ventimiglia will be rehearsingwith the Clifton Community Band.Very fitting, noted Cathy. We metin CHS in the Mustang Band.
Its a Tuesday and a school night so making dinner for my hubby(Jim Byrne) and my son and probably a heart shaped cake!
Lynne Bessell Byrne
Michele Noblett and I willbe celebrating our one yearanniversary of meeting onMatch.com.
Keith Oakley
Unfortunately, I need toattend an evening meetingfor work. So I will professmy love for my beautifulwife of 39 years, Linda,right here in the CliftonMerchant.
Russell Triolo
I am planning on taking my girlfriend, Lindsay Dueben, back tothe place that we had our first date, Naunas in Montclair. Thedays are slow until you reflect on the first date and see how muchyouve grown together over the years. Its been amazing. I loveyou more today than yesterday and its been that way for fouryears. This will be the best Valentine's Day until next year.
Joe Shackil
Anabela Castro Carrino says she will bespending quality time with her favoriteguy...her hubby, Tommy Carrino.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 9
Ok, sure their names rhyme (Cassie and Bassi) butwhat else does this couple have in common?Bradley is a retired cop who worked with kids...we like the simple things and each others compa-ny. Life is good here in Salt Lake City, pro-claimed Craig who taught at CHS for 39 years. She contacted us through Facebook and offered
congratulations on the January edition which fea-tured Marching Mustang Director Bob Morgan.Craig was a mainstay on the band staff fordecades. Her updates continues: Im enjoying theweather and my granddaughters here in the west.As for Valentines Day? Going to LaCaille, a
premier French Provincial style restaurant, here inSalt Lake City for a wonderful dinner with mybeautiful man. Well let you know if she sends aFeb. 15 update... Bradley Bassi and Cassie Craig in Salt Lake City.
Cassie Craig & Bradley Bassi
What are you doing for
Valentines Day?We do about 15 weddings on Valentines Day, said Kristin Corrado, thePassaic County Clerk. Marriages are on a first come, first serve basis.No appointments. We decorate the Freeholder room. People tend to befestive. We have a lot of brides come in wedding gowns and people whospecifically want that day and take pictures.
February 2012 Clifton Merchant10
Love Stories
It was a chance meeting at the St. Marys HighSchool prom that first broughtAshley Terhune andDean Veres together. Five years later, theyre now
bondedinmarriage.
Ashley, a 2005 graduate of CHS, was at the
Rutherford school prom in 2006with her boyfriend,
whoattendedSt.Marys.Aftershespilledadrinkon
her dress,Ashley ran off and bumped into Dean, a
classmateofherboyfriend,whowasatthedancewith
hisexasfriends.
Iwassittingatthehorsdoeuvrestablewithsome
friendsbecausemyboyfriendwasbeingajerk,plusI
hadspilledsomethingonmydress,Ashleyexplained.
I lookedup and saw thesegorgeous light blue eyes
lookingatme,soIasked,Canyouseeastain?He
lookedatmeand said, Nope. I immediatelydisre-
gardedhisopinionbecausehesaguyandmostguys
dontnoticestainsanyway,butfortherestofthenight,
Ikeptthinkingaboutthoseeyes.
IhadseenAshleybeforeandrememberedwhoshe
was,Deansaid,butIdidnthaveanyindicationafter
sheaskedmeaboutherdressthatshewasinterestedin
me.Itwasntuntillaterthatweek,whiletalkingon
thephonewithoneofherfriends,thatAshleylet the
newsslip.
Iaskedmyfriend,whohadbeenatthetablewith
Dean and Ashley Veres
Once Upon a Time: A Modern-Day Fairy TaleBy Tania Jachens
Clifton Merchant February 2012 11
me,whowastheguywiththeblueeyes,Ashleysaid.
IadmittedthatIthoughthewasreallycute.
Her friend stirred the pot a bit by secretly having
DeanonspeakerphonewhilespeakingwithAshley.
Iwas so embarrassed, so I tried toplay it off by
joking thathe should takeme tomypromatClifton
High,Ashleysaid,laughing.
Later on,Dean contactedAshley on the computer
viainstant-messenger.
It was quite a bit of a shock, said Dean, who
recalledhowthe twostayedupallnightspeakingon
thecomputer. Itwas the last thing Iwasexpecting
since shehad a boyfriend at the time, but then I got
excitedandlookedforwardtogettingtoknowherbet-
ter.Ididntjumpattheopportunitytotakehertoprom
because theonly timewehadever talkedwasatmy
promIwasntcomfortableyet,plusshewasstilldat-
ingherboyfriend.
A few days later, Ashley broke up with her
boyfriend and began datingDean after amemorable
firstdate.
Mybrotherandhiswifedorescueworkwith the
Mid-Atlantic Great Dane Rescue League and they
weresettingupameetandgreetforadoptingdogsin
Ringwood,Ashley explained. I asked him to take
thedrivewithme.
I didnt really consider it a date at first I just
wantedtohangoutwithher,Deansaid.Iwasexcit-
ed and nervous because it was the first time I went
somewhereunknownwithacompletestranger.
The tensionwaseasedoveramutually shared tal-
ent: sign language. Dean,whoseparentsarehearing
impaired, is fluent inAmericansign,andAshleyhad
studiedinhighschool,soduringthedrive, theentire
conversationwas conducted in sign. After spending
timewiththedogs,AshleyandDeanwenttoanearby
RiteAid,whereAshleypretended tobedeaf so they
couldwalkaroundthestoreforhoursandpracticeher
signing.
Followingtheirfirstdate,DeanandAshleycontin-
uedtoseeeachother.However,theirblissfulromance
wascut short. Deanandhisparents,whoover from
Hungary in the 70s, were to travel to their native
countrytovisitfamilyforfiveweeks,leavingbehind
hisnewgirlfriend.
Unbeknownst to everyone, I already had a
Office: 973-778-4500 x 103789 Clifton Ave., Clifton, NJ 07013
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant12
Love Stories
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planinmindwhileattheairportleavingforHungary,
Deanexplained.IrealizedthatIwasmakingamis-
take by going to Hungary then and leaving Ashley
behind.
The day after he
arrived, Dean schedule a
flightbacktoAmericafor
twoweekslater
When a 17-year-old
boy will fly halfway
aroundtheworldtocome
home early for you, you
know hes the one,
Ashleysaid.
Later on that year, the
couple went on vacation
with Deans father and
sister to Cancun, where,
befitting their whirlwind
romance,Deanproposed.
Hewaspacingon the
balconyoutsideourroom
and acting weird, so I
askedhimwhatwaswrong,Ashleysaid.Hestarted
tellingmehowspecialIwastohimandthenIrealized
thatyouonlyget this spielon twooccasions:youre
eithergettingdumpedorproposedto.
I was trying to stay calm, Dean explained. I
knew,morelikelythannot,itwouldturnoutOK,but
Iwantedtogetthepresentationright.
On thebalcony,with a sweepingviewof the city,
pool and ocean lit up
below,DeanaskedAshley
tomarryhim.
Iwassoexcited that I
didnt even look at the
ring, Ashley said. I
flungmyarmsaroundhim
and almost knocked it off
thebalcony.
However, the union
would not take place for
severalyears,asbothDean
and Ashley mutually
agreed to complete their
studiesfirst.
The wedding finally
took place on May 27,
2011, two weeks after
Ashleys graduation from
MontclairStateUniversity
(DeanhadgraduatedtheyearbeforefromSetonHall
University.)Itwasalmostexactlyfiveyearssincethe
daytheyfirstmetatDeanshighschoolprom.
Optingforsomethingmoreuniquethanatradition-
alchurchceremony,AshleyandDeanwerewedinan
y.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 13
intimate, outdoor ceremony at Lambert Castle on
ValleyRoad.
The flowers and trees were in bloom, so it was
beautifulandsoperfect,Ashleysaid. More than I
couldhaveeverdreamedofasalittlegirl.
After a small lunch reception with their guests,
Ashley and Dean went home to their two dogs, got
changed and were watching TV, when they realized
they were hungry. Where do two newlywed
Cliftonitesgoforabitetoeataftertheirwedding?To
theHotGrill,ofcourse!
WewalkintoHotGrill,ourcarissittingdecorated
in theparking lot, I havemyhair andmakeupdone,
butIminsweats,laughedAshley.Weorderedthree
allthewayandfrieswithgravy.
For their mini-moon, Ashley and Dean went to
Bostonfortwonights.There,theywenttoaRedSox
gameasAshleysweddingpresentforDean,whoisa
die-hardfan.AshleysfavoritepresentfromDeanisa
book, entitled What I LoveAboutYou, which he
gaveherseveralyearsagoforChristmas.
Itsablankbookwithquestionsandhefilledthem
all out, Ashley said, flipping through the book.
Ninety-fivepagesworthofthingsthatareimportant
tohimaboutme. It stillmakesmecryevery time I
readit.
What makes me smile is knowing that I get to
wake up and have such an amazing person by my
side,Ashleysaid. Someonewholovesmeforme,
someonewhohasmyback100%ofthetime.Itsan
amazingfeelingknowingyoufoundtheotherpieceto
yourpuzzle.
Likesomanyothercouplesbeforethem,Deanand
Ashleyhavelearnedthatsacrificeandcompromiseare
necessary.
The most important element in a relationship is
knowingwhentogivealittle,andIdontmeanmate-
rialthings,Deanexplained.Ithastobespiritually,
mentally,emotionally,plusknowingwhentocompro-
mise.
Being honest is also very important, Ashley
added.Donttakeyourselvestooseriouslyanddont
forget to have fun. Nomatterwhat, put that person
above everyone else, including yourself. Always be
supportive, whether theyre right or wrong, because
youregoingtowantthatfromthemtoo.
From Aches & Pains...
Dr. Michael Basista, Medical Director of Immedicenter
Immedicenter1355 Broad St. Clifton 973-778-5566www.immedicenter.com
To More Serious AilmentsWe at Immedicenter are here for you, 365 days per year
Monday - Friday 8am to 9pm
Saturday and Sunday 8am to 5pm
Walk-in Medical Care
Weekday Appointments Available
February 2012 Clifton Merchant14
Love Stories
In addition to chemistry, love is also about timing.Eventhemostpassionaterelationshipcanfizzle if the
conditionsarenotright.Butoccasionally,thingssome-
times pick up at a later date as it didwith Lenn and
MarieElenaFeldmann,whometagainatareunionin
1990,30yearsafterdatinginCliftonHighSchool.
HemovedtoCliftoninsophomoreyearandImet
him the next year, saidMarie Elena, whose maiden
nameisResitano.Agirlfriendofminebroughthimas
adatetomysweet16party.
Wehavephotographstoprovethatweweresitting
together, dancing and chatting the whole time. So I
guess I stole her away, she laughed. But I wasnt
allowedtodateuntilIwasasenior.Icamefromavery
strictItalianfamily.
When that day finally rolled around, Lenn asked
MarieElenaoutimmediately.Thecouplecontinuedto
datethroughouttheirfinalyearatCHSandattendedthe
1960promtogether.
But then our parents got scared that wewere too
serious, said Marie Elena, who was headed off to
Montclair State College. Lenn, who studied at
VanderCookCollegeofMusicinChicago,dumpedhis
girlfriendaftermuchprodding fromhis father. Marie
Elenawasheartbroken,andthetwodidntspeakagain
formorethanthreedecades.
Lenn and Marie Elena Feldmann
It Was Meant to BeBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 15
February 2012 Clifton Merchant16
Love Stories
Wehadourseparate lives. Webothgotmarried,
she said. However, bothMarieElena andLennwere
singleagainfortheCHSClassof196030yearreunion,
whichwasheldattheSheratonHotelin
FairfieldinOctoberof1990.
I remethimclose tomidnightand
wejusttalkedforever,recalledMarie
Elena.Thethingendedattwoandwe
justtalked.Wewerebothprettyoutgo-
ingandcheeryandthatsprobablywhy
weconnected inhighschool. Artistic
too.
Lenn,whowas living inFlorida at
the timemaking a living as an accor-
dionperformer,decidedhewasgoing
to stay inNewJersey for abit longer
afterrunningintohisoldflame.
Idecidedtostayandwecontinued
dating,hesaid.Afriendofmineup
herehadabusinessthatIstartedworkingat. Healso
hadaclientthatownedamotelinParsippany,soIgota
roombythemonth.
NeitherMarieElenanormyselfwerereallylooking
foranyoneelse,explainedLenn.Wekindofresigned
ourselvestofate,whatlifehadgivenus.
Myself, I enjoyed being single, saidMarie Elena.
Butatthatpoint,wejustremetanditclickedsowell.I
hadsaidtomysonduringthesummer
before that Im never getting married
again and he was so shocked when I
toldhimthatIwasgettingmarried.
The ceremony has held on
Valentines Day in 1991. We didnt
havealotofyearslefttowait,laughed
Marie Elena. It was very romantic.
Weretraditional. Wegotmarriedand
thenhemovedinwithme.
Shehadwellestablishedrootsand
mymottowas, Have accordion,will
travel,Lennlaughed.Iwasagypsy
ofsortsandthissettledmedown.
If itwas someonewhoyouwere
friendlywith, if youmeet themyears
later you just pick up right where you left off, said
MarieElena.Itsabouttherighttiming.Itjustwasnt
therighttimeyearsago.Butwhenwegooutandsee
people thatwe knewyears ago, they always say, you
see,itwasalwaysmeanttobe.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 17
PODIATRYThomas Graziano, DPM, MD
1033 Clifton, Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-473-3344
Jeffrey Miller, DPM
1117 Route 46 East, 2nd Floor
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-365-2208
Eugene A. Batelli, DPM
1117 Route 46 East, 2nd Floor
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-365-2208
Zina Cappiello, DPM
886 Pompton Ave, Suite A-1
Cedar Grove, NJ 07009
973-857-1184
Glenn Haber, DPM
140 Grand Ave.
Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-0212
John Mc Evoy, DPM
152 Lakeview Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-340-8970
Kevin Healey, DPM
152 Lakeview Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-340-8970
Matthew Welch, DPM
6506 Park Ave.
West New York, NJ 07093
201-662-1122
Anas Khoury, DPM235 Main Ave.
Passaic, NJ 07066
973-473-6665
PAIN MANAGEMENTLadislav Habina, MD
1117 Route 46 East, 2nd Floor
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-357-8228
Kazimierz Szczech, MD
1033 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-473-4400
Binod Sinha, MD
1117 Route 46 East, 2nd Floor
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-777-5444
Todd Koppel, MD
721 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-473-5752
ENDOSCOPYPiotr Huskowski, MD
1005 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-778-7882
CHIROPRACTICMichael Gaccione, DC
26 Clinton St.
Newark, NJ 07012973-624-4000
Terry Mc Sweeney, DC
600 Mount Prospect Ave.
Newark, NJ 07104
973-485-2332
ENTStephen Abrams, MD
1070 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-773-9880
ORTHOPEDICSKent Lerner, MD
17 Jauncey Ave.
North Arlington, NJ 07031
201-991-9019
UROLOGYDaniel Rice, MD
1001 Clifton, Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-779-7231
OPHTHALMOLOGYCharles Crowley, MD
1033 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-472-6405
GENERAL SURGERYKevin Buckley, MD
1100 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-778-0100
Edwin Kane, MD
1100 Clifton Ave.
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-778-0100
Ramon Silen, MD
1117 Route 46 East, Suite 301
Clifton, NJ 07013
973-779-4242
Call your physician about schedulingyour surgery at Clifton Surgery Center.
Meet some of our Physicians...
PodiatryGeneral Surgery
Dr. Kevin Buckley
Dr. Thomas Graziano,
DPM, MD Charles Crowley, MD Dr. Daniel Rice, MD
Ophthalmology Urology
Schedule your surgery at Clifton Surgery Center. We are athree room state of the art, nationally accredited, physicianowned facility. Smaller and more service oriented thanhospitals, patients and theirfamilies benefit from theconvenience and lower cost.
February 2012 Clifton Merchant18
Love Stories
Whats an Emil? Perhaps a more uptight person would takeoffense to a joke about their name from a blind date they just
met, but Emil Ihle saw it a sign of a good sense of humor in
the girl who would later become his wife.
Relative strangers for most of high school, Emil met Dawn
during their junior year in 1980 after being set up by mutual
friends.
Jimmy Monaco, a good friend of mine, was trying to date
her sister, Kim, and he said I just had to go, laughed Emil.
He was taller than me, so we would be walking through the
hallways and hed be like there she is but I never could see her.
The two never met face to face until May 11 of that year,
when Emil and Dawn joined Jim and Kim on a double
Dawn and Emil Ihle
Same Birthdays, Different Hospitals...By Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 19
February 2012 Clifton Merchant20
Love Stories
date at the Allwood Theater to see The Naked Bomb.
The movies are always a safe date, laughed Dawn.
We just hit it off right away, bonding over many things.
We were both born on April 29. Same birthday, but dif-
ferent hospitals.
Though Kim and Jim
never clicked, the other
couple shared immediate
chemistry and continued
to see each other through
years end before Dawn
cut ties with Emil.
Everything was fine
until she broke up with
me, laughed Emil. It was
simply at matter of practi-
cality. As a child, Dawn
would spend summers in
Connecticut with her
grandparents. With so
much distance between
them and no facebook or
cell phone to keep up on communication, she made the
choice to break things off for the summer.
I called him as soon as I got back home! added
Dawn. This time, the relationship would last. The sen-
iors dated throughout the their final year at CHS, being
crowned Class Couple. They continued to see each
other in college, with Emil attending FDU and Dawn at
the Capri Institute.
He wanted to get serious before I did, laughed
Dawn, who now works at Valley National Bank.
When it finally came time to propose, it didnt go
smoothly for either party.
His uncle had a jewelry store and we went to go
check out rings, she recalled. I was holding on to a
diamond with tweezers and I squeezed it and it just goes
ping and flies across the room.
The actually presentation didnt go down as smooth-
ly as Emil had envisioned
in his head. We were
engaged in the bathroom,
laughed Dawn. Emil had
stuffed the ring at the bot-
tom of a pair of Candies
shoes he bought for his
girlfriend. Unfortunately,
Dawn had no interest in the
shoes, and became upset
when Emil kept attempting
to get her to try them on
before finally finding the
prize at the bottom.
The wedding was held
on Oct. 19, 1988the
shared half birthday for
both Emil and Dawnwith the reception at The Fiesta on
17. We wanted surf and turf, she explained, adding that
Emil may have spent more time eating than socializing.
The Ihles now reside in the home that Emil grew up
in after his parents moved to Clifton from Palisades
Park in 1977.
They have two children who also happen to be
Marching Mustang Alum: Melissa, a 2009 grad, and
Christina, who graduated in June 2011. Our kids going
to CHS was a no brainer for us since we went there, he
explained. I married my best friend, explained Emil.
High school sweethearts can last.
Previous page the Ihle family, from left Melissa, Christina,Dawn and Emil. Above, the couple in the CHS yearbook
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Clifton Merchant February 2012 21
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant22
Love Stories
It wasnt a typical courtship, but Jerry and Jane Decletwouldnt have had it any other way. Rather than a series
of dates and dinners to get to know one another after
meeting in the Summer of 1965, the couple spent their
first 19 months writing thousands of letters to each other
while Jerry was stationed in Okinawa, Japan while serv-
ing in the Air Force.
Its a real love story that lives on, Jane smiled.
Though the two started dating in 1965, they had first
been introduced two years prior.
After graduation years ago, everyone goes to the
shore the next day, explained Jane, who met Jerry in the
Summer of 1963. I was going steady with this fellow,
and were sitting on the beach and I see Jerry on the
beach playing volleyball. Janes boyfriend recognized
Jerry from his homeroom, and introduced the two.
We saw them later and he said to Jerry, I want you to
meet my girlfriend Jane Lewis, she recalled. As Pete
and I are walking away, I said to him, If its the last thing
I do, Im going to marry that guy.
Jane and her boyfriend did end up splitting, but she
didnt see Jerry again for two whole years. It was 1965
and I was with my friends at a park and Jerry pulled up in
his little Fiat, she said. He was home on leave. He got
out of the car and I just went whoa! I walked up to him
and asked him if he remembered me and he did.
Jerry and Jane Declet
Letters of LoveBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 23
February 2012 Clifton Merchant24
Love Stories
Jerry asked the newly single Jane to go out with him,
and the couple saw each other frequently over the next
two weeks. However, the Air Force recruit was slated to
return back to service half way around the world in
Okinawa, Japan.
I went with his family the day after Thanksgiving
and brought him to the airport, she recalled. There, he
asked me if Id wait for him and I said absolutely.
For 19 months, the two would write each other daily,
amassing several thousand letters that Jane still keeps
hold of to this day.
Thats how we got know each other and made prom-
ises to each other, she said. And we both wrote to each
other that if the feelings werent the same when we got
home then wed understand and it would be a mutual
agreement.
Not a day went by without a letter, Jerry recalled.
Jane also sent his a Christmas tree for their first holiday
together. And each letter that I received from here
contained a stick of Wrigleys spirit gum.
It was just another place for me to write I love you,
she said. He went through a lot of gum in his 19
months. I also had a GI Joe doll in an Air Force uniform
at my house. If I didnt get a letter from Jerry that day,
my grandfather would hang him from the door.
While the two built a strong relationship through the
letters, there was still the creeping doubt in each of their
minds that the bond might not be as strong in person.
Both Jerry and Jane agreed in writing to mutually end the
relationship should that fear become reality, which creat-
ed some anxiety when he returned home in June 1967.
I had taken off to go on Thursday to go with Jerrys
parents to pick him up, but the flight was so delayed that
they werent coming in until Friday morning, she said.
Man, when he got off that plane he looked so good, so
handsome. We just sat in the back seat of his parents car,
Previous page are the Declets on their wedding day, an undated photo and Jane and Jerry reviewing lettersfrom his time in Okinawa, Above standing: Jerry Jr., Amanda, Liz and Jason. Sitting is Samantha, Jane,Jayden, Juliet and Jerry. Not pictured is Granddaughter Carlie.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 25
holding hands. We wanted to kiss but of course we
wouldnt dare.
I was nervous, said Jerry. Youve been away for
19 months and the one that youve fallen in love with
is going to be with your parents. But when I actually
saw her and my parents, that feeling just came back.
It was just a great feeling.
Jerry took a job at the Givaudan Clifton plant to
satisfy her fathers demands and soon proposed to
Jane. They wed the following year on Aug. 25, 1968,
and soon after had two sons: Jerry and Jason.
Jerry would later go on to become a member of the
Clifton Police Department, enjoying a 27 year career,
serving 14 in the juvenile detective bureau. Jane
worked for Sun Chemical which became US Ink for a
total of 32 years. Now both retired, they enjoy one
anothers company, New York sports and their many
grandchildren.
What a compliment it is when your kids are at the
age that theyre getting married and they say we just
hope our marriage is as good as yours, said Jane.
You cant have a better compliment than that from
your kids.
Were very proud of our boys, said Jerry.
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant26
Love Stories
Its not often that high school romances work out.Immaturity and a general lack of life experience tend to
make sure of that. However, if those two same individ-
uals were to give it a second shot years later, would the
results be the same?
For Warren and Linda Orey, that second chance at
love worked. The Clifton High School graduates first
started dating in high school before splitting and coming
together a few years later after bumping into each other
one again.
We met in August 1974 at band camp, he said. Linda
went to Christopher Columbus and I went to Woodrow.
She was a majorette and I played sax.
Top: The Orey family, from left: Michelle, Warren, Lindaand Doug. Middle. Warren and Linda in a recent picture,and two takes of the couple in band camp at top right andabove, with friend Nancy Terry.
Warren and Linda Orey
It Began in Mustang Band CampBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 27
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant28
Love StoriesWhat happened is on the last day of school, Linda,
being the nice person she is, said to keep in touch with
me over the summer, said Orey, whose father, Emil,
was the principal of CCMS, and knew his sons future
wife when she attended the middle school. I called her
the very next day and said what are you doing, and she
said, well its summer...
After some talking, Warren convinced Linda to go on
a date with him to Berterand Island, an amusement park
near Lake Hopatcong.
It was love at first sight
for him, she said. For me,
it was the son of my junior
high school principal.
The two started dating
before junior year during the
summer of 1975.
We went to senior prom
together, but Ill be honest, I
had dumped him before
that, she said. Before we
were even dating in high
school, he said he wanted to
ask me to senior prom. Even
though we broke up I didnt
break my promise.
During high school,
Warren and Linda had a
tumultuous relationshipa
fact that was well known
amongst friends.
At the bands Christmas Dance (now known as the
formal) seniors always get gifts from Santa, said Linda.
We were given the record Breaking Up is Hard to do.
Our reputation preceeded us... it was the typical type of
high school sweetheart relationship. I hate you, no, I
hate you. Senior year, I felt, and it was more me, that
we needed to explore different avenues to see if it was
really true love.
And as seniors in high school, Warren and Linda
went their separate ways. It would be more than two
years before they reconnected again.
My dad had left CCMS and was principal of School
3. Every spring, hed take the third grade class on a
field trip. Theyd get on at Clifton Blvd., take the train,
take the ferry over to Manhattan, he said. I was a
chaperone, and I was working the night shift at the time.
I got off of work at 7 am and I was going to meet my
dad at the train station.
Driving on Paulison Ave., Warren ended up crossing
paths with his old flame.
I was on my way to the train station and she was on
the way to work. We had not so much as crossed paths
in two years, said Warren of the meeting which took
place in May 1979. A month later, I am at a grad party
for a friend of mine that lived up the street... and Linda
shows up with a girlfriend and
she came up to me and said
hello.
That brief encounter was all
that was needed to rekindle
their relationship. Early the
next morning, Warren and
Linda set out for Point
Pleasant together and caught
the sunrise. Almost a year
later, they were engaged on
May 21, 1980. On July 11,
1981, the couple was married.
I bought the diamond at
Lackis on Van Houten, he
said.
He already put a deposit on
that diamond in December,
added Linda. The Oreys
would go on to have two chil-
dren. Their son Doug, a 25
year old musician, currently
lives in Boston and was profiled by the CliftonMerchant in Aug. 2010 while he was living in Clifton.Daughter Michelle, 27, is a teacher in Manhattan.
Though the couple is originally from Clifton, they
left the region to pursue job opportunities in Fredrick,
Maryland, a suburb of Washington, DC, where the
Oreys eventually stayed to raise their children. Warren
was originally with Hilton Hotels and is now in the
radio business. Linda is the executive assistant for the
Director of Transportation of Fredrick County Public
Schools, where she has been for 18 years.
My mom and dad still live on Highview Dr., said
Warren. All of our family is up in the New York, New
Jersey area, so as soon as the opportunity permits, we
will be back up since theres nothing like Hot Grill and
White Castle.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 29
February 2012 Clifton Merchant30
Love Stories
When she first met Clifton Police Officer John Burkein November 1979, attraction was the furthest thingfrom Cathy Latteris mind. Instead, she was more
focused on making sure the person who just hit her new
car was brought to justice.
I had an accident at the corner of Clifton Ave. and
Lakeview. I was coming from my dads restaurant, The
Dayton Restaurant, where I worked, she recalled. A
young kid in a pick up truck threw a bottle out the win-
dow. He had been drinking and when he did that he lost
control of the truck and slammed into my new car... then
he lost control a second time and smashed right into the
front end of my car.
The two pulled into the gas station at the corner and
not long after, a cop car arrived with John and another
officer inside.
He showed up with his partner and I was a raving
lunatic. I felt he should have gone into the middle of the
street and retrieved the bottle, laughed Cathy. He just
kept on telling me, Go talk to my partner, go talk to my
partner. That was just getting me all the more angry.
I said to her that Im just driving, hes writing the
report. Go talk to him, recalled John with a laugh.
Cathy almost found herself in trouble when she was
unable to find the proper documents for her car when
John asked for them.
Cathy and John Burke
Five-O... In Pursuit of LoveBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 31
February 2012 Clifton Merchant32
Love Stories
And as a usual, typical woman, in the glove com-
partment are all the expired insurance cards. I must
have had 15 in there, she said. And then I start get-
ting nervous, I know its in here and he starts pulling this
attitude.
Later on that night, a
friend, also a cop in anoth-
er town, advised Cathy to
go file a complaint the next
day at City Hall.
I had firm resolve
going in there and Im
almost at the chiefs door,
but who comes walking
down the hallway, she
laughed. He was so sweet
I couldnt go through with
it and I kind of turned
around and walked out.
Cathy suddenly found
herself constantly thinking
about John, and pressured her friend, Kenny DalPos, a
beat cop in Botany Village, for more information.
However, she assumed that was the last she had seen of
John. But just a few weeks later, fate brought him down
to Botany Village.
One evening, an alarm went off at the jewelery store
next door to The Dayton Restaurant. Cops cleared the
building, but the owner could not be contacted, and John
went inside to see if they
knew the owner.
The minute he walked
in, I was like, here we go
again, Cathy recalled.
But when he came in, he
was just so very sweet to
my mother. I just kind of
melted so to speak and
then I couldnt let it go
after that.
This time, she got
Johns address from
Kenny and went to leave a
note on his car, only to
realize a few weeks later
that she had placed it on an identical car on the same
street. Cathy then tried a more direct approach, going
through Kenny.
John and Cathy Burke, with their daughter, Erin, in a recentphotograph. Cathy is a history teacher at ChristopherColumbus, and John is a retired lieutenant in the CPD.
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Clifton Merchant February 2012 33
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I wrote my name and number on a paper and gave it
to him, she recalled. But then his wife found the num-
ber in his pocket and then Kenny comes to me and says
that Ive got to explain it to her because shes not going
to believe me.
After many hang ups in trying to contact John, he
finally got the message and the two went on their first
date on Dec. 7.
We went on our first date to New York City to see
the tree, said Cathy. That night I happened to mention
I had season tickets to the Giants, and that in my heart
of hearts is what got him. Plus, my father owning a
restaurant.
I only tell her that part of the story when I want to
harass her, John added.
Both Cathy and John had previously been married,
which made them approach the new relationship in such
a way that they easily connected.
We both knew what we were looking for, said
John. I was madly in love. At the beginning, there was
a miscommunication, I didnt even know about the
things with Kenny at first. Our relationship started off
slow, but once we went out, I think I fell in love with her
that night.
Sensing that he had found his true love, John wasted
no time and proposed on Nov. 6, 1980, exactly a year to
the day of the accident. He said were going to see my
mother, hurry up, hurry up, she recalled. On the way,
John stopped at the same gas station that he met Cathy.
He stopped the car, handed me the accident report and
reached in the back seat and he had a box all wrapped
up with a ring in it.
Just a year later, the two were wed on April 25, 1981.
However, in those early years, married life was some-
times difficult. At the time, Clifton officers worked
rotating shifts, and Johns hours were unpredictable.
Cathy worked as a teacher, and was also studying for
her Masters, But the two agree that the early adversity
helped build their relationship, create understanding and
made them appreciate each other and personal space.
What it all boils down to is what we agreed upon a
long time ago, said John. People get married and its
for life. Somehow that becomes a stumbling block. We
said were getting married for 100 years with the option
to renew.
I think the best compliment my daughter has given
us is that she hopes she can find herself in a relationship
like the two of us have one day, said Cathy.
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant34
Love Stories
More than 20 years ago, as a young gay man,Courtney Coleman was cautioned by a friend not to
worry about trying to change everyones perception
of his sexual orientation. He told me to just live my
life with integrity and truth, Coleman said. That
advice became my driving force.
While growing up, Coleman, now 45, lived with
his parents and two siblings in California and
Hawaii before the family moved to Washington
State.
After graduating from high school, he attend-
ed culinary arts school in Seattle and landed a
job for Exxon, cooking on ocean-going tugboats.
After a few years, he was transferred by the
company to a position based out of New York.
Coleman and his dad packed up his car with
all his belongings and two cats, and drove
across country, where he settled in North
Haledon.
It was a bit of culture shock for me when I
arrived, he said. The East Coast was complete-
ly alien to me, but the job worked out well, so I
stayed.
About a year-and-a-half after starting his new posi-
tion, Coleman was laid off. He worked a few odd jobs
here and there for a while, but he felt unsettled. I
wasnt having much success with dating and meeting
people, so I planned to go back to Seattle, he said.
Then, in June 1994, Coleman met Russell
Schneider at an event sponsored by a gay social net-
working organization. The group arranged gatherings
at private homes to enable gays to meet in places
other than bars.
We went out on a couple of dates and really hit it
off, Coleman said. I called my dad and told him
that I met someone and that I decided not to come
back home.
Russ Schneider & Courtney Coleman
A Life of Truth & HappinessBy Carol Leonard
Clifton Merchant February 2012 35
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant36
Love Stories
Coleman had come out to his family in his early 20s,
so his father knew that the special someone to whom he
was referring was another man.
Eleven years older than Coleman, Schneider, now
56, had grown up and lived most of his life in Clifton
in a home attached to his parents Clifton Ave. floral
business, Schneiders Flowers.
After graduating from CHS, he attended Baldwin-
Wallace College in Ohio and, upon completing his
bachelors degree, took a job in the schools admissions
office, where he stayed for another four years. In 1981,
he returned home to take an administrative job with the
Chamber of Commerce and continued to work for the
Chamber in various positions for 18 years.
Before meeting Coleman, Schneider had previously
been in a seven-year relationship that had ended. It was
during that time, when he was about 28 that he came
out to his family.
It had become pretty obvious to them, he said. I
think most already knew or assumed that I was gay, but
it was hard for me to actually come out to them.
Eight months after they met, Coleman and Schneider
decided to solidify their growing relationship with a
service of unity. They flew out to Seattle for the cere-
mony, which was held in a Unitarian church on
February 19, 1995.
It was at a time before the passage of laws in some
states allowing civil unions or gay marriage, so the cou-
ple only received a Certificate of Holy Union from the
church. It had no meaning under the law, Coleman
said, but it meant a lot to us.
About 30 family members and close friends of the
couple attended the service, and Colemans brother
served as best man.
Among those not attending was his father. I knew
that he loved me and wanted me to be happy, so I just
had to accept his decision not to come, Coleman said.
At first, his mother also said that she would not attend,
but surprised him when she showed up and walked him
down the isle. That was pretty cool, he said.
Coleman also received a number of hurtful replies
from extended family members he invited who not only
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Clifton Merchant February 2012 37
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t
,
m
s
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declined the invitation, but also sent
notes expressing their disgust with
the idea of a gay union.
Most disappointing to Coleman,
though, was the absence of everyone
from Schneiders family. He didnt
invite them, Coleman said. I didnt
think that was fair.
For Schneider, it was a difficult
decision to exclude his family, but at
the time, he said, he just didnt feel
comfortable with telling them about
the ceremony.
When the couple returned home,
Coleman framed a photo of them
walking down the isle together and
proudly displayed it in their home.
As the laws in New Jersey
changed, the couple later entered
into a legal domestic partnership and
on April 22, 2007, they renewed
their vows again in a civil union
service. This time, 120 of their
friends and family members from
both sides attended the ceremony.
During the early years of their
partnership, Schneider continued in
his job with the Chamber of
Commerce and Coleman got a job
working for Nordstrom, first in sales
and later in management and human
resources.
In 1998, they took over the floral
business, which was being run at the
time by Schneiders mother and sis-
ter-in-law after the deaths of his
father and later his brother.
On a wing and a prayer I learned
how to do flower arranging,
Coleman said. We bought into the
business on the assumption that I
could learn to do this. It wasnt as
easy as I first thought.
Hes actually very good at it,
Schneider chimed in. Hes has a
very good eye. Its not something
that I could do.
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant38
Love Stories
Instead, Schneider has always handled the financial
and marketing end of the business, while Colemans
role has been the creative one.
The downturn of the economy has taken its toll on
many small businesses, including the floral business, so
a few years ago, the couple started looking for jobs that
one or both of them could do to supplement their
income.
Coleman started working a few days a week prepar-
ing meals for another gay couple. That has since
expanded into a more full-time role, which includes
cleaning and planning parties for the couple at their
home. Schneider sometimes helps out as well.
Coleman continues to assist the full-time designer at
the floral shop with flower arrangements on the week-
ends, so the couple leads a very hectic life.
In their free time, they like getting together with
friends, many of whom they know through their
church, or going to the theater. Weve always pretty
much been homebodies, Schneider said.
Schneider is active in town in the Rotary Club and
serves on the Board of Directors at the Boys & Girls
Club. Coleman often accompanies him to dinners and
fundraisers for the organizations.
We also do a lot with family, Coleman added. My
relationship with Russ gave me a wonderful extended
family, which I enjoy a lot.
Coleman and Schneider recently rented out their
own home to move in with and help watch over
Schneiders 90-year-old mother. It has worked out
very well for all of us, Coleman said.
Over the years, the couple admits that theyve had a
few tiffs, but they usually get along very well and com-
plement each other.
Housework and chores, for instance.
Coleman does almost all the cooking, while
Schneider, whom both describe as the fussier one, han-
dles the cleaning.
He does the things that I cant do, like throwing a
great party, Schneider said of his partner. He knows
how to make people feel comfortable. I was never good
at that; Ive always been the shy one.
Coleman responded, Im more outgoing, but he
keeps me grounded. I have a tendency to go off in five
different directions, but he pulls me back in. Its a good
balance. He makes me feel comfortable in my own
skin.
In their younger years together, Coleman and
Schneider discussed the possibility of adopting chil-
dren, but decided against it.
Theres a lot of stress in raising children and being
in the minority group of being gay is stressful enough,
Schneider said. That was true even more so 18 years
ago when we first met.
We have a great relationship with our nieces and
nephews, Coleman said. Weve been a big part of
their lives.
Asked what they else they want people to know
about their partnership, Coleman and Schneider
stressed that they have the same hopes and dreams as
heterosexual couples.
Were just two guys who love each other and have
been faithful to each other for a long time, Schneider
said.
Being gay is not a choice, Coleman added. The
only choice is to live it out or live it in the closet. Weve
chosen to live our lives in truth as contributing mem-
bers of the community.
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Instead, Schneider has always handled the financial
and marketing end of the business, while Colemans
role has been the creative one.
The downturn of the economy has taken its toll on
many small businesses, including the floral business, so
a few years ago, the couple started looking for jobs that
one or both of them could do to supplement their
income.
Coleman started working a few days a week prepar-
ing meals for another gay couple. That has since
expanded into a more full-time role, which includes
cleaning and planning parties for the couple at their
home. Schneider sometimes helps out as well.
Coleman continues to assist the full-time designer at
the floral shop with flower arrangements on the week-
ends, so the couple leads a very hectic life.
In their free time, they like getting together with
friends, many of whom they know through their
church, or going to the theater. Weve always pretty
much been homebodies, Schneider said.
Schneider is active in town in the Rotary Club and
serves on the Board of Directors at the Boys & Girls
Club. Coleman often accompanies him to dinners and
fundraisers for the organizations.
We also do a lot with family, Coleman added. My
relationship with Russ gave me a wonderful extended
family, which I enjoy a lot.
Coleman and Schneider recently rented out their
own home to move in with and help watch over
Schneiders 90-year-old mother. It has worked out
very well for all of us, Coleman said.
Over the years, the couple admits that theyve had a
few tiffs, but they usually get along very well and com-
plement each other.
Housework and chores, for instance.
Coleman does almost all the cooking, while
Schneider, whom both describe as the fussier one, han-
dles the cleaning.
He does the things that I cant do, like throwing a
great party, Schneider said of his partner. He knows
how to make people feel comfortable. I was never good
at that; Ive always been the shy one.
Coleman responded, Im more outgoing, but he
keeps me grounded. I have a tendency to go off in five
different directions, but he pulls me back in. Its a good
balance. He makes me feel comfortable in my own
skin.
In their younger years together, Coleman and
Schneider discussed the possibility of adopting chil-
dren, but decided against it.
Theres a lot of stress in raising children and being
in the minority group of being gay is stressful enough,
Schneider said. That was true even more so 18 years
ago when we first met.
We have a great relationship with our nieces and
nephews, Coleman said. Weve been a big part of
their lives.
Asked what they else they want people to know
about their partnership, Coleman and Schneider
stressed that they have the same hopes and dreams as
heterosexual couples.
Were just two guys who love each other and have
been faithful to each other for a long time, Schneider
said.
Being gay is not a choice, Coleman added. The
only choice is to live it out or live it in the closet. Weve
chosen to live our lives in truth as contributing mem-
bers of the community.
February 2012 Clifton Merchant40
Love Stories
Roland Krygsman with his wife of59 years, Lena. Below is the coverof his book, A Boy From Flakkee.
Meet Krygsman at a book signingand for coffee and conversation on Feb. 11 from 1 to 3:30 pm
at ANT Book Store, near the intersection of
Clifton and Main Aves.
In 84 years, Roland Krygsman has lived
through The Great Depression, the German
occupation of The Netherlands and an emi-
gration to America in 1955. These memories
and more can be found in his book, which is
now on sale. Recently, we spoke with Roland
to get some of his thoughts and opinion on a
number of topics...
Pearls of Wisdomfrom a Boy from Flakkee
Clifton Merchant February 2012 41
Pearls of Wisdomfrom a Boy from Flakkee
What makes a marriage last?
Ill tell ya... honesty and love. The most impor-
tant thing is love, through all things good and bad.
You stay together and show genuine love and that
overcomes everything in the world. Sometimes you
have situations in your life where you dont know
whether to turn left or right and the best thing to
do is to take the middle way, which is mostly the
honest way. If youve done something wrong, be
honest about it. If youve hurt someone, make up
for it. Theres way too much hate in this world. If
they can turn that hate into love, the situation
would be 100 percent better.
What are you doing for Valentines Day
Weve got nothing special planned. Its just
another day. We live from day to day, do our week-
ly shopping, watch a little television and talk about
the good old days with my wife. It sounds simple
but it is beautiful. Simply beautiful...
Tell us of your scariest moment?
When the dikes broke on Feb. 1, 1953. We had a
very bad storm and the water kept on rising and ris-
ing on a Saturday night. The dike watchmen were
alerted, but no one expected that water would come
so high that the dikes just washed away. Whole vil-
lages and farms were flooded. That was the most
dangerous time in my life, more dangerous than the
war. I was celebrating my future wifes birthday
she was born Jan. 31and I came on motorbike to
her home. She lived about 10 miles away. It was a
big struggle to keep it on the road due to the strong
winds. Afterwards, I was planning on going home
but her father said youre not going home in this
weather. I went to move my motorcycle to safety
and I got surprised by a big wall of water that came
from no where after the dikes broke. I was caught
on top of the road by the dike in the middle of the
night, pitch dark, in a big storm with rising waters.
Recall your happiest moment?
When I first saw my girlfriend Lena again after
being separated for three days following the flood.
The reunion was in Rotterdam, in a big hall where all
the evacuees were. I was brought in on a stretch-
er because I was in the water for so long that I
couldnt walk anymore. My legs were swollen to
twice their size. I woke up the next morning and my
lovely Lena came over. She was there helping
everyone and I had the surprise of my life.
What role does religion play in your life?
Religion plays a big role. All of the religions, they
all tell you to believe in God and God tells you to
love each other and to help each other, not hate
each other and shoot and kill and all that violence.
You put that teaching and what your parents taught
you, love your fellow human being and try to help
them all you can with deeds or words and youll
come a lot further in this world.
What was the most important day in your life?
Surviving the war. When it ended, we were all
together. Many were missing. Fathers, sons or
even whole families that were wiped out by bombs.
But we survived without a scratch. We were hun-
gry, but we made it. No more fear of being bombed
at night. No more fear of being arrested by the
German SS. No more fear...
How did the Depression shape your life?
We were not the only ones who were poor.
About three fourths of the town was as well, we
had no jobs or no food. The men usually worked on
the farms in the summer and in the winter, there
was no work. They were unemployed and there was
no welfare. You had to help each other with what-
ever. If you had one loaf of bread, youd try to
divide it between many more people than you usu-
ally do. One slice of bread is better than none at all.
It wasnt generosity. It was a question of surviving.
If you knew the people next door had a big family
with young children and no food, and you were
lucky enough to have potatoes or vegetables, you
did whatever you could to help your neighbor.
Over your decades, how has Clifton changed?
Dutch Hill has no more Dutch people! Theres
now mostly Spanish families in the area. Like us
Dutch, some are good and some are bad. But in the
end, we all want to be loved... Life is simple!
February 2012 Clifton Merchant42
How Can You Help?
ATTEND A FUNDRAISER:Feb. 17, 2012 5 - 10 pm
Kick Off Nightat Bliss
March 16, 2012
Pub Night Fundraiserat Pub 46
May 6, 2012 4 - 8pm
Pasta Dinner at The Boys & Girls Clubof Clifton
BUY A RAFFLE TICKET:Win a TV or a Bike
MAKE A CONTRIBUTION: Officer John Kavakich973-470-5897
Tom Hawrylko973-253-4400
Our 16 man team leaving Clifton on May 9 in thePolice Unity Tour has an arduous task ahead ofthem... besides the 300 mile bicycle trek toWashington D.C., the group must also raise more than$28,000 to help build a monument and museum in thenations Capitol.
The Police Unity Tour is an annual bike ride toWashington D.C. in memory of fallen officers. Nearly19,000 cops have given their lives in the line of duty,and their names are etched on the National Law Enforcement OfficersMonument and Memorial in Washington D.C.
Each name represents a sad story of an officer from across the U.S.killed in the line of duty, including Clifton Police Officer John Samra, whodied in the line of duty on Nov. 21, 2003.
Go to www.policeunitytour.com for details or www.cliftonpba36.com.To help out, call Clifton Police Officer John Kavakich at 973-470-5897 orTom Hawrylko at 973-253-4400.
Meet us at Bliss on Feb. 17 to kick off the 2012 Police Unity Tour
We Ride for Those Who Have Died
Clifton Merchant February 2012 43
Worth over $500No monetary value. Winner has option of male or female bicycle.
Proceeds from these raffles benefit CliftonPBA members who participate in the 2012Police Unity Tour. This annual 300 mile
bicycle ride leaves NJ on May 9 in an effort
to raise awareness of police officers who
have died in the line of duty and to raise
funds for the National Law Enforcement
Officers Memorial. The group must raise
$28,000 and asks the community to support
the effort by purchasing raffle tickets or
sending a donation.
To purchase tickets, call Clifton
Police Officer John Kavakich at
973-470-5897, or via e-mail sgt-at-
[email protected] or call
Tom Hawrylko at 973-253-4400.
Both Drawings to be held on Sunday, May 6, 2012 at 8 pm at the Clifton PBA 36 Unity Tour Pasta Dinner
We Ride for Those Who Have Died
55 ToshibaValue: $2600
42 Sharp Value: $700
201-636-23558 Franklin Pl., Rutherford
February 2012 Clifton Merchant44
Love Stories
If it were a movie poster, the tale of Sylvia and AlexisSainz may scream: The American Dream & Coming toAmerica. Sainz, whose family came from Mexico in
1992 when she was just 10 years old, had to return to
their native country in 1998 as punishment for overstay-
ing their Visaa penance that would ultimately grant
them the coveted Green Card.
While she was initially upset that she was forced to
move from the country she was raised in, Sylvias
despair soon turned into elation when she met the young
boy in a computer class at a local school who would
later become her husband.
I was going to pay my tuition and I turn around I see
him and hes grabbing this girls leg, she recalled. She
was in my class and she introduced me to him later. In
the beginning, he didnt think I liked him and I didnt
think he liked me.
Sylvias cousin ultimately passed along the world to
Alexis, who then proceeded to break the ice.
He came up to me and asked me to marry him. He
gave me a lollipop, she laughed. And instead of me
giving him an answer, he gave me a kiss. And we start-
ed dating from there.
Right from the start, Sylvia and Alexis dealt with
adversity in their relationship. Shortly after meeting,
Sylvias moved to the state of Morelos, nearly four
hours away from Toluca, where Alexis lived.
Wed call each other every day and he used to visit
every two weeks, she recalled.
The relationship continued in this manner for six
months until Sylvias immigration documents were
finalized and she returned to the United States.
We didnt see each other for about six more months.
Everyone was like, oh, youre not going to last, long dis-
tance relationships dont last, she recalled. My phone
bill started to get really expensive. It was $1,000 that
first month.
That first bill prompted Sylvia to get a job at the
Midtown Grill so she could keep in contact with Alexis,
while he prepared to leave his family and move to
America to be with her.
He had to beg his parents for all the papers to come
up here, she said. He had broken his leg just before
he was supposed to come, and kept the cast on only for
20 days because he didnt want to wait.
The Sainz family: Alexis, Alexis Jr., Sylvia and Johan.
Alexis and Sylvia Sainz
Finding Love & The American DreamBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 45
February 2012 Clifton Merchant46
Love Stories
Alexis arrived in Clifton in
February 1999, and began living
with Sylvia.
I was in high school and I was
working. I gave birth to my son in
April 2000 and then I graduated that
same year, said Sylvia, who attend-
ed night school while working to
make sure she could graduate on
time. After I got off the field, he
proposed in front of everyone.
But growing up so fast immediate-
ly created troubles for the young cou-
ple. When I gave birth to my first
son, Alexis, I had $35 in my bank
account. And on the way to pick me
up at St. Joes, he got a flat tire and
had to spend that money, recalled
Sylvia. Youre young and you think
life is easy. When something like
that happens, you realize it really
isnt. I went from teenager to parent,
and I didnt have the learning
process. The first three years were
very hard. We worked it out by set-
ting goals. I put up the goals and he
gives me the support. Thats why
weve accomplished goals together.
Everything is because he helped me.
The couple worked long hours in
the early years, holding multiple jobs
to make ends meet, and Sylvia went
to school for medical billing to get a
better job. Gradually, their plans and
goals began to flesh out.
After saving their money for sev-
eral years, Sylvia and Alexis put
themselves in the position to have
the wedding they had always
dreamed of.
Ours was really small, she
recalled. The couple was wed on
April 1, 2001. We didnt have any
money and we didnt have a party.
We went to a buffet after with just
my family.
But those plans were put on hold
when, one day after school, Alexis,
asked his mother why they still lived
with grandma.
Its the American Dream to own
a house, she said. When our kids
asked, we wanted to provide them
with that dream.
After pooling together their
money, and with help from her
mother, Sylvia, the couple closed on
their first house on Aug. 18, 2011.
My mom, she supported us a
lot in the beginning. The kids were
so excited, she recalled. The
kids were the ones who opened the
house and they started screaming.
It is our dream house. Its not big,
but it is a good size, with a finished
basement, hardwood floors and its
near the park. I think this house is
meant for us.
I think we became very good
friends, she said. We always told
each other the truth. In the begin-
ning, it was a bit of a challenge. No
one thought we were going to last.
Clifton Merchant February 2012 47
February 2012 Clifton Merchant48
Love Stories
When Martha Seminario Llong came to America inMarch of 1995, it was supposed to be a one month tripto New Jersey to help prepare her thesis on designing
toys for children with physical disabilities.
I came with $60 in my pocket. My friend lent me the
money for the ticket, recalled the graduate of the
Catholic University of Peru. It was supposed to be an
adventure trip and Id come home in a month. Go make
a couple of bucks, do my research and go home.
But those plans quickly changed once Martha settled
down in Montvale with her sponsor family, the
Diamonds. Unable to find jobs in her intended field, she
extended her stay, which later stretched to six months
after two of her friends were involved in a serious acci-
dent, Martha volunteered to help with their care.
But even after all of the unexpected hiccups, Martha
was steadfast in her decision to return home to Peru until
the day she met a worker who had come to install a wall
unit in the Diamond home. It was the day after Labor
Day in 1995, recalled Ken. We went to install a custom
wall unit and thats when I met Martha.
The two struck up a friendly conversation over a cab-
inet that Martha used to store her possessions.
He came back the next day and Mrs. Diamond
(Mindy) was so concerned that I didnt go out for all of
those months that I was there, she said. At the end of
the second day, Ken asked for Marthas number. She
told him that I never go out, and shes like go, go, go!
However, after that first date, Martha and Kens rela-
tionship was kept to the phones, as she tried to keep her
distance since the plan to return to Peru was still in place.
In December, Ken returned to the Diamond household to
repair a cabinet and was surprised to see Martha, who
once again extended her stay.
Going clockwise: Martha and Ken on their honeymoon, the couple at their wedding on June 27, 1997 and at Machu Picchu.
please turn to page 52
Ken and Martha McGowan
Pursuing Dreams... and LoveBy Joe Hawrylko
Clifton Merchant February 2012 49
1301
Brothers Don and Rich Knapp
We now doGutter Cleaning Roofing Siding Gutters & Leaders Windows
We are the sons of the found
er of
R.F. Knapp Construction, a family
owned business founded in Clifton
nearly 50 years ago. Since the beginning,
we have been using Alcoa Siding prod-
ucts as well as GAF and Owens-Corning.
We specialize in roofing, siding, gutters,
leaders and windows. Give us a call and
we will gladly set-up an appointment to
discuss your job needs and go over a
complete written estimate.
Assemblyman Thomas P. Giblin
Athenia Mason
Century 21
Tom Siso, Sr.
Coldwell Banker Clifton
Frances Rosado
Gina Torres
Pina Nazario
Corradino & Papa
Downtown Clifton
Fette Ford
Genardi Contracting Inc.
Neglia Engineering Associates
North Jersey
Federal Credit Union
Paramus Catholic High School
Precision Motors
Pub 46
Sign-A-Rama
Smith Sondy
St. Marys Hospital
Styertowne Shopping Center
The Diamond Agency
Carlos Cortes
Christine Romanelli
Frank Cortes
Stanley Gottlieb
The Salt Cavern
Thomas Graziano MD, DPM
Vitos Towing
Weichert, Realtors
Passaic County Community College
Passaic County Elks Cerebral Palsy Treatment Center
February 2012 Clifton Merchant50
Clifton Merchant February 2012 51
February 2012 Clifton Merchant52
Love Stories
I asked him what he was doing for New Years Eve and
he said he didnt do much, so I was thinking that hes
ditching me, she recalled. He said why dont we go
out Saturday and then he asked me for a Christmas kiss
and that was the beginning of the end!
Sixth months later, Martha moved in with Ken in July
1996. I really began to integrate into the American cul-
ture, she said. I started learning about football too.
Actually, our first date was all about football. I taught
him about soccer and he taught me about football.
But a new immigration law that was to go into effect
in August 1997 hung over the relationship. If Martha
were to return home as intended, she was not able to
come back to America for 10 years.
I said to him I like you very much, but you dont
want to stay with someone that cant go ahead, she said.
And then he just says dont go, lets get married. No
kneeling, no ring, no love story, just dont go and lets get
married. I said, are you serious? And he said yes. But
the problem was that we had to tell our parents.
Marthas family was already unhappy that she had
stayed for so long and was living with her boyfriend out
of marriage, and Kens parents were still recovering
from the surprise of their son showing up with a steady
girlfriend at the regular McGowan Sunday dinner just a
month prior when they revealed their plans.
We had to get married in three months and the first
thing everyone thought was that I was pregnant, she
laughed. The pastors at St. Andrews Church where the
couple attended and planned to marry were also unsure
of what to make of it, and only accepted their intentions
as legitimate after Mr. Diamond vouched for the couple,
who were wed on June 27, 1997.
Marthas mother, Sara Llong, and some relatives did
make it up from Peru to meet her husband at the ceremo-
ny, as did Marthas penpal of 16 years, Gina
SunderPalssmann Weiland, who flew in from Germany
to meet Martha for the first time. Eventually, the Ken
and Martha did make it down to Peru to visit Marthas
large and diverse family that could not make the trip.
Its like the United Nations, laughed Ken. Marthas
family includes people of Peruvian, Chinese, French,
Dutch, Spanish, Chilean and Argentinian backgrounds.
When Ken and Martha welcomed their two children into
the world a few years later, the briefly considered vari-
ous traditional names from their backgrounds before set-
tling on two choices that had a more significant meeting.
Y means and in Spanish, so Kym was for Ken and
Marthano more discussion there, she laughed.
Patrick was because he loves St. Patricks Day. On our
first St. Patricks Day, we joked that if we had a son, his
name would be Patrick. Kym, 10, and Patrick, 7, both
attend St. Andrews School, where their mother has been
a fixture eve since coming to this country.
She does everything but park the cars in the parking
lot, laughed Ken. Martha has volunteered for numerous
positions, and worked for some time as an art teacher.
She said her friend and fellow parishioner, Rosemary
Trinkle Baran, is the one who got her involved in the
church community. She was my sponsor when I first
came to St. Andrews, recalled Martha. The best part
is Im very involved with my kids school.
However, her involvement at the parish has been put
on hold recently, as Martha pursues the thing that
brought her to America in the first place: her Masters in
industrial design. Though she has freelanced in the field
over the past decade, Martha took a break and has been
taking courses online at the Academy of Art University
in San Francisco, and will graduate this coming fall.
Its never too late to pursue your dreams, smiled
Martha. Im 45I still have plenty of time.
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February 2012 Clifton Merchant54
Stair Lifts
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Stair lifts are chairs that help a person getup and down a flight of stairs. Perhapsone of the greatest gifts that a persongrowing old in their home can get is toremain in their home. Stair lifts may makethe difference between being able to stayin your home and being forced to move toan assisted living facility.
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Door Handles
Our handles include a Push-to-Enterand P ull-to-Exit design and areADA compliant with less than onepound push or pull - Makes for anexcellent door handle for those withphysical limitations.
The lift chair is one of the more com-mon tools used to improve accessibil-ity. Designed to make it possible tostand and sit without requiring assis-tance, these chairs make life easierfor those with leg and hip problems,and provide a comfortable place to sitand relax, like a Lazy-Boy recliner.
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