Coaching Parents to form their own children Whole Family Catechesis

Coaching Parents to form their own children

Whole Family Catechesis

If you want to read more…

Coaching parents

A plan to have much higher expectations of our parents

www.PastoralPlanning.com

Goals in this presentation

How can we succeed with restored order of initiation sacraments?

A conversation about the role of parents What should it be? What doesn’t that always happen?

What resources are there to support a greater role for parents?


Question

What is the toughest aspect of this for you as a parish priest?


Decree on Bishops, #44From Vatican II

Called for the development of a

Directory to guide Catechesis

International Study Weeks were underway:–Nijmegen, 1959–Eichstatt, 1960–Bangkok, 1962–Katigondo, 1964 –Manila, 1967–Medellin, 1968

Already at that time

A real turning pointShifted from teaching “about religion” to helping folks have an encounter with Christ

The study weeks led to…

A wave of activityaimed at renewing catechesis!

The church makes a shift

‘71: Gen’l Catechetical Directory ‘75: Evangelization in our Time

Evangelii Nuntiandi

‘79: Catechesis Today Catechesi Tradendae

‘88: Catechumenate: RCIA ‘92: Catechism of the Catholic

Church ‘97: Gen’l Directory for Catechesis

Evangelization Today

1975 Pope Paul VI Very concise, very readable

One of the most important documents published in the church since Vatican II!

Evangelization Today

Catechesis in a ministry of the Word “It initiates church members… …into the meaning of Christian signs

and symbols” It assumes that folks have

consciously accepted the proclamation of Christ

Conversion precedes catechesis! Catechesis is Christo-centric

Catechesis in our Time 1979 From Rome Repeats the Christo-centric themes

from EN Focus on catechesis

for the whole community by the whole community

Calls for it to be lifelong

1988

The church…Restored the Catechumenate…after almost 1700 years of decline!

A fantastic, new, and powerfulunderstanding of catechesis emerged!

Followed, in 1992 by…

The Catechism ofthe Catholic Church

The revision of the

General Directory for CatechesisSigned by Pope John Paul II in 1997

Which led to…

Places the catechumenate in a central place and role

Sets the stage for lifelong faith formation for all ages!

The

General Directory for CatechesisIn Plain English

Which led to…

Two Great Goals

Help folks turn their hearts toChrist, discover Christ in theirlives & love the Church…

Evangelization

Offer all members some level ofinstruction in the faith to deepentheir conversion…

Catechesis

We know

More than 90% of adult Catholics are active today because their parents were active only about 10% come to the church

as adults What does this tell us? Parents play THE vital role!


A timeline to help

until 1960

Formation in the homeMass every week Feasts & SeasonsFasting & abstinenceConfession

Religious Ed: filled in a tiny gap


A timeline to help

until 1960 1960-70s

The old “Catholic culture” endedTelevision & mediaHuge cultural shift in WestAt Mass less often

Religious Ed: bigger gap to fill www.PastoralPlanning.com

A timeline to help

until 1960 1960-70s 1980-90s

Religion classes at parish or in schools …with the parents mainly absentParticipation in Sunday Mass on the declineHome life more secular & media oriented

Religious Ed: HUGE gap to fillwww.PastoralPlanning.com

A timeline to help

until 1960 1960-70s 1980-90s Today

The numbers tell the truth The leading indicator

“Will they have faith?”

The role their parents played

in their formation.


We have to help develop

the role of parents.

Two groups of parents

#1 Deeply engaged Active in parish life At Mass every week Household of faith

#2 On the edge of the parish Show up when the kids need it Very tentative about faith Religion not central in life


These two groups The engaged – only about 16-20%

Still reluctant about formation for their own kids

Believes this is the job of the parish The unengaged – nearly 80-85%

Some are hungry for more But many are distracted so they

don’t even feel the ache or longing… These are the ones we must love the

mostwww.PastoralPlanning.com

The outcome of this:

The passing of faith from Generation to Generation has slowed down or stopped.

Parents tend to remain absent… as long as we agree to do it for

them.


Many parents Feel un-equipped Don’t know their own faith Haven’t got the fire of faith in

their own hearts

So they drop their kid at the parish

And go shopping


And we at the parish

We accept these children And we do a pretty good job

But we will always be only the substitutes

Parents form their own kids, even if they don’t take an active role


Add to that…

Restored order of Confirmation The “carrot” will be gone What will hold them?

If they stayed only for the carrot, Our formation wasn’t working

anyway

We aren’t losing very much

What seems to work

A combination of 3 things: Focus on the goal of

helping people know Christ Coach parents to form their own

kids Participatory liturgy


http://www.thepastoralcenter.com/

From the GDC #53

Conversion is first. It is the full and sincereadherence to the person of Christand the decision to walk in his footsteps.

Faith is a personal encounter with Jesus Christ,the making of oneself a discipleand it demands a permanent commitment

to think, judge, and live like him.

General Directory for Catechesis


From the GDC #98

What we find at the heart of all catechesisis not a book or a theology system,but a person!

The fundamental task of catechesis is to present Christand everything in relation to him

leading people to follow Christ in their lives.



The Question of the Week

Breaking Open the Word A process used in the RCIA A two step process:

Re-proclaim part of the readings from Sunday Mass

Then ask first: what touched me? what word or phrase did I hear?

Followed by: how does this affect my life?

Year B is available on the

site now -- FREE

The witness of pastors When you share what you believe In simple but honest words Others see belief as more possible

for them

You may need to rehearse or practice this in front of a mirror or with each other.

Living Christ retreats Friday evening and Saturday all day About 30 folks per retreat Leaders and host team from parish Working with your local team

Brendan, Chris et al. Deepen communion with Christ

Grow in your ability to “die in Christ”


http://www.pastoralplanning.com/

Living Christ retreats Use YOUR leaders Do not make this complicated Start with those in your parish who are

already evangelized through Cursillo or other retreats

Provide follow up Questions of the Week Mini-Course gatherings or bible study Be ready with follow up pastoral care

Resources

There are many resourcesto help you implement this

at


What seems to work

A combination of 2 things: Focus on the goal of

helping people know Christ Coach parents to form their own

kids Participatory liturgy



From the GDC #226

The religious awakening which takes place in the home

during childhoodis, simply,

irreplaceable.



From the GDC #227

The local parish must, therefore, help parents

by whatever means works best,to prepare for and assume

their responsibility,of educating their children

in the faith.



Whole Family Catechesis A new form of religious education

One where parents take the lead With their children If parents can’t…

Grandparents Older youth or others from the parish

The parents are the teachers.


Coach your parents.

When you coach parents to form their own children

The parents also grow in their faith

You can’t just “send home a book” Parents are intimidated It’s not community based


Coach

To succeed You need 3 things:

#1 Leadership & vision to see the whole picture of what it takes to grow up Catholic

#2 A Parent-friendly resource

#3 Motivate the parents to jump in


Coaching Parents


Baptism

The years after Baptism…until about age 5 or 6

Prep for Confirmationand First Communion& Confirmation

Key years after the First Sacraments

Secondary schoolyears

Growing up Catholic


Baptism

A dual approach One avenue for parents who are

active and engaged

Another for those who are on the edge of parish life and faith

These live in a “Catholic” home

Baptism prep materialsfrom a Catholic publisher are

usually enough

The goal here is:Evangelization

Instead of the usual three night prep process,

a three night retreat-like experience

I Claim You for Christ One example of a retreat-like

process

Three sessions Journey of Faith from their own baptism

to the present moment Dying in Christ – Reconciliation Living in Community – Eucharist

A covenant about raising their kids in faith


Here’s what it looks like

Found on the web site

An E-product


Coaching Parents


Baptism


Post-baptism care

Who stays in touch? Again, a dual approach

More for those who are not engaged than for those who are

Entrusted to Your Care One example of a method for

staying in touch E-product Reproducible Letters, e-mail, calendars, invitations,

& prayers The key: Stay in touch Relationship!


Who’s got time for this?



An E-product


Coaching Parents


Baptism


Prep for early Sacraments

An ideal time to launch coaching Parents expect to be more involved Parents & kids attend together

They work as a family through the lesson.

Here’s one example:

from Growing Up Catholic Sacrament Prep Coaching Notes are all ready to use


Confirmation before Eucharist

4 Sessions for Confirmation Begin with their own baptism Turn to a treatment on Mary End with a strong understanding of

the Holy Spirit Move on to Eucharist immediately

10 sessions total About one year of work

Growing Up Catholic

Parents and children sit together A strong resource is on the table A Catechist leads the process People called “floaters” are available

keeping an eye out for parent needs

Here’s a picture of the room:


PrayerTable

FoodFood

Supplies

1 The purpose of exercise is to understand & pray the Our Father.

2 First, read through the words of the Our Father with them. Read one line and invite your child to repeat it after you. Your child should know this prayer by heart. Affirm your child often as he or she learns.

3 Then help your child find the correct meaning of each phrase of this prayer. Draw a line to that. We have given you two clues to get you started. Here’s the key:

1 = 42 = 83 = 1 (given)4 = 7 (given)5 = 26 = 57 = 38 = 99 = 610=10

Creating the Resource

Number the steps Give the answers in a key Do this in a parish gathering Make it interesting and fun

You will discover something:Parents want to do this.


1 We will now read about how Jesus is our friend, just as a shepherd is to his sheep. Begin by showing your child a Bible. Open it to show them this passage.

2 Tell them that we are going to read this story in words that we understand better.

3 Then close the Bible and ask them to read this passage aloud. Help them when needed. Ask your child to retell this story in his or her own words.

4 Time for a break! Help your child enjoy coloring this image of Jesus and the children.

Coloring time is a good time to be close to your child without necessarily talking about faith.

Don’t be afraid to put your arm around your child during this time.

5 Your child may not be familiar with what shepherds do. Explain that they look after their sheep with tenderness and love. Jesus watches over us that way.

What about Confession?

Growing Up Catholic has a 6-session prep process for Reconciliation

BUT – should you wait until they’re older?

Plus: we must return to this sacrament many times throughout life…

Heartily Sorry

Gathering with all ages to learn about and celebrate Reconciliation

Solemn gathering Solid learning about God’s mercy “Confession” isn’t the only form of

Reconciliation

Often with non-Catholic

spouses present



An E-product

Coaching Parents


Baptism


Prep for Penanceand First Communion


After the Sacraments

Learning Centers for Parents Parents in one room Kids in another

room Prayer Then parents move

between 15-minute quick sessions, coaching them on specific topics of faith


Centers: Little children Primary school age Secondary age Theological

background Seasonal

suggestions for the Catholic home (Advent, Lent, summer, etc)

After the Sacraments

Very similar to the Growing Up Catholic approach

The goal is to start a conversion about faith that will go home with them

Whole Family Catechesis Parents and

children work together

Sitting at the same tables

They learn about the topic and actually go through a lesson

Coaching Parents

Follow the themes set out by the Church in the GDC:


RevelationTrinityJesus ChristThe ChurchMoralitySacramentsThe Kingdom of God

ScripturePrayerSocial TeachingsThe MassOur Hunger for GodChastitySin and Grace



An E-product


Another example

Faith on the Run

Parables on the Run

Miracles on the Run

Learn to Love the Saints

One fold fliers E-products: PDFs You print Used to

encourage parents to insert a sacred moment in the busy-ness of life

Coaching Parents


Baptism


Secondary school years

Prep for Penanceand First Communion& Confirmation


The period of “catch-up”

For children ages 8 thru 12 or 13 Children’s Liturgy of the Word Rooted in Sunday liturgy Excellent resources already exist

For everyone older than 13 or so Mini-Courses on the faith Content & conversion oriented

Mini-Courses

How do they work? Parents and youth sit together Open with something to break the ice Pray as one whole group Then move to small groups

“Active learning” With a strong way of teaching “Learn & Teach”


Here’s one example Growing Faith Mini-

Courses Short, defined areas of study Combined with faith sharing Usually 6 to 10 sessions per

Mini-Course

For example: What Does God Want?

Living the Commandments


48 Study Guides

for Learn & Teach are all

FREE

Learn & Teach Break the material into small chunks

and assign each to a small group The group draws out the major points

Creates a one-page flip chart sheet on them which will be presented to all

And prepares one of the points for dialogue in dyads in the larger group

They learn by teaching


Coaching Parents


Baptism


Secondary schoolyears

Prep for Penanceand First Communion& Confirmation


To succeed You need 3 things:

#1 Leadership & vision to go forward under this plan

#2 A Parent-friendly resource

#3 Motivate the parents to jump in


Marketing Try this:

“In today’s world, a lot of people are talking to your children about God…

…Shouldn’t you be one of them? Come to St Mary’s – we’ll show you how.”

Or this: “Give your child what really matters: Share your Catholic faith. Come to St Mary’s – we’ll show you how.”


Marketing

Don’t be tentative! We’d really like it if you’d take part,

but of course, you don’t really have to…

We don’t want to make you mad or anything, but this is really your job…but of course, we’ll do it for you if you don’t want to…

You get lackluster results.www.PastoralPlanning.com

Marketing

Personal invitations Coming from other parents Changing the ground over time so

all will expect to be involved in the on-going formation of their children

Welcome all to Sunday Mass, Regardless their situation in life

Now…

What does a fullydeveloped parish

look like?

www.ThePastoralCenter.com


The Core Work of the Parish

Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach

Stewardship envelopes& buildings

FormationSac PrepSchools& RCIA



Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach



The Current Pastoral Plan



Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach



Parish basedprocess

where folksexperienceconversion

The Current Pastoral Plan



The New Pastoral Plan

Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach

Stewardshipenvelopes& buildings

FormationSac Prep& RCIA

Encounters&

Retreats



Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach



Encounters&

Retreats




Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach



Encounters&

RetreatsLifelong

Formationto sustainconversion




Liturgymusic &

devotions

Pastoralcare &

outreach



Retreats&

Encounters

LifelongFaith

Formation




5 Steps to get rolling: (1) Go home and form a Lifelong Faith

Team Pastor People invested in these age groups

From baptism prep to high school

Key volunteers & Parents (2) Study and read Great Expectations

Hold the discussions Follow the book

Your team’s job:

Plan with you to implement this Recruit new catechists & new assistants for the programs Work with you to schedule and carry

out the various levels of faith formation Organize to invite parents personally

into the process Pray with you for all who come forth

Your next steps…

(3) Use the Planning Guide (free)

What elements of coaching work for you?

What timeline might you follow?

Who needs to be involved?


Your next steps… (4) Schedule a parent & catechist meeting

Use the Parish Workshop Provided free by us

The Workshop includes: Outline for a two hour workshop Prayer sheets – reproducible Talks and Exercises – all outlined PowerPoint pres ready to use or adapt if you

wish


To get these FREE tools

The Planning GuideThe Parish Workshop

PastoralPlanning.com Parent Coaching Center (on the home page)


Get started

(5) Start slowly Sacrament Prep? Baptism?

Keep adding one group after another

Think long termwww.PastoralPlanning.com

Documents

Coaching Parents to form their own children Whole Family Catechesis