ConflictResolution

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhBM7H-ggvY

Overview

• Recognizing Signs of Losing Control• Developing Self Control• Learning a Technique

What is Anger?

• Anger is a strong feeling of displeasure, rage, and/or strong emotion usually combined with an urge to harm.

Can you pick out the signs of

anger?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDYyv-iLmRY&feature=related

Signs of Anger

• Increased heart rate• Tension• Adrenaline pumping through your body

Why does anger make us want to dominate an opponent?

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkQ0szdOwyQ

What Angry People Want

• They want what THEY want

• They want help

• They want choices

• They want acknowledgment and attention

Losing Control

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjQzhs6mXgg

Hostility

• Exhibiting hostile behavior means that you have resorted to instinct instead of intellect.

• Hostility is a primitiveway of seeking to control surroundings.

Self Control

• Self Control means one is controlled by exploring consequences. One controls one’s desires and impulses and develops willpower.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isfn4OxCPQs

Strategies for Self Control

• Identify your triggers• Slow down your responses• Take a time out• “I’m better than that”• “I’m not getting suckered”

Strategies for Self Control

•“I won’t pay the price”•Put yourself in their shoes•Observing•Preparing•Humor•Venting/not venting

Empathy Statements

•Usually short and to the point

•Allow the other to respond

•Use the broken record technique

•Don’t use the word “but”

•Don’t restate the obvious

•Be careful of your tone

•Don’t use “I”

Limit Setting

1. Describe the Unacceptable Behavior

2. Request Behavior Change3. State Consequences– Use Cooperative Language– Use Enforceable Consequences

4. Offer Choices

Enforce Limits

–Refer to the limits stated previously–Request they go along with the consequence–Offer further help

Self Control Technique

We want you to…

HALT

HHoldyour

Tongue!

AAcknowledge

the anger/problem.

LListenCalmly

TTalk it

out

Wait before you act

to avoid consequences.

“You must be the change

you wish to see in the world.”

-Gandhi