Detail Poster Packet - melissawingela.weebly.com

Detail Poster Packet

Created/Compiled by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, Grand Blanc Teachers and Genesee County

Literacy Coaches, Fall 2009

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Dialogue, Compiled/Created by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, and Grand Blanc Teachers, December 2008.

Dialogue

--Dialogue is talk that is written down in a story as if a character was speaking. (Teaching the Qualities of Writing, JoAnn Portalupi and Ralph Fletcher)

--A conversation between two or more characters. Dialogue is used to build a scene or to show character. (The Revision Toolbox - Georgia Heard)

--Dialogue, as much as anything else, reveals the character to the writer and, ultimately to the reader. I don’t have a very clear idea of who the characters are until they start talking. (Joan Didion) Questions to ask yourself about dialogue

Does this dialogue help develop my character? Does the dialogue sound like the person talking? How can you start your story with dialogue for an interesting lead? Does the dialogue help develop the action in the story?

1. Don’t clutter your story! 2. Be careful not to overuse it. 3. Make the dialogue that is important stand out.


Dialogue Resources *Fletcher L-17 Tighten Dialogue *Fletcher L-18 Using a Natural Voice *Fletcher L-19 Believable Dialogue—Guidelines for

Effectiveness *Fletcher N-8 Capturing Bits of Conversation Calkins (K-2) Revision #4 Session 3 Adding Dialogue Calkins (K-2) Authors #5 Session 14 Turning to Authors for Specific

Help *Teaching the Qualities of Writing by Fletcher and Portalupi

Texts to Teach Dialogue

• Oh, the Places You’ll Go, Dr. Seuss (one person conversing with reader)

• Meggie Moon, Elizabeth Baguley (dialogue sprinkled throughout) • Mrs. Wishy Washy—Joy Cowley • The Hungry Giant—Joy Cowley • Greedy Cat is Hungry—Joy Cowley • Corduroy—Don Freeman • Peter’s Chair—Ezra Jack Keats • Little Pig—June Melser • Horace—Joy Cowley

Text That Use Speech Bubbles

• The Monster at the End of This Book—John Stone • My Friend is Sad—Mo Williams • Yo! Yes!—Chris Raschka • A Flea Story—Leo Leoni • Excuses, Excuses—Andrea Butler • Go, Go, Go---June Melser • Pat the Cat—by Colin and Jacqui Hawkins • Digging Up Dinosaurs—Aliki • Suddenly!—Colin McNaughton • Knuffle Bunny—Mo Williams • Knuffle Bunny Too—Mo Williams


Dialogue Writing Using Different Writing Genres Type of Writing

Use of Dialogue? Yes or No

A lot OR Some Dialogue

Example of Dialogue Is the Dialogue believable? Why?

Types of writing : cartoons, picture books, newspaper, magazines, chapter books


Type of Detail: Dialogue

Definition: Dialogue is conversation that is written down in a story/piece as if a character were speaking it. Trade Books to support/examples of: Precious and the Boo Hag by Patricia McKissack The Stray Dog by Marc Simont Emma Kate by Patricia Polacco I Wanna Iguana by Karen Kaufman Oh! The Places You’ll Go – Dr. Suess Questions to ask: Does the dialogue help develop your character? Which dialogue is believable? Not believable? Does this dialogue move the action/plot of my story forward? How do you make the dialogue sound more like the way people actually talk? How do you write dialogue for multiple characters speaking? How can you start your story with dialogue for an interesting lead? How much dialogue is needed? How do you use proper punctuation? Would your story be stronger without it? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: L-17 – How to Tighten Dialogue L-18 – Use a Natural Voice L-19 – Write Believable Dialogue N-8 – Capturing Bits of Conversation

Lessons:

• Compare the dialogue in two texts, one that has unnecessary dialogue, and one that has relevant dialogue. (Examples: Michigan Chillers vs. Winn Dixie)

• Use past student work or writing samples to read-aloud to show ineffective dialogue that is hard to follow. Have students work in groups to revise writing by crossing off unnecessary dialogue.

• Read David Gets in Trouble by David Shannon, which contains almost all dialogue. Have students expand by writing non-dialogue text to show the importance of the dialogue that is already written.



Definition: Dialogue is talk that’s written down in a story as if a character was speaking it. Trade Books to support/examples of: David Goes to School by David Shannon A Flea Story by Leo Lionni What Are You So Grumpy About? By Tom Lichtenheld Mrs. Watson Wants Your Teeth by Alison McGhee Wild Child by Lynn Ploude Questions to ask: Does the dialogue help develop your character? Which dialogue is believable? Not believable? Does this dialogue move the action/plot of my story forward? How do you make the dialogue sound more like the way people actually talk? How do you write dialogue for multiple characters speaking? How can you start your story with dialogue for an interesting lead? How much dialogue is needed? How do you use proper punctuation? Would your story be stronger without it? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: L-19 Write a Believable Dialogue L-17 Tighten Dialogue I-28 Work with External Conflict I-29 Work with Internal Conflict


Lessons:

• Read A Flea Story by Leo Lionni. How does the author show that the characters are talking? Story uses dialogue bubbles to show that the characters are talking. Students will create a cartoon to create dialogue bubbles. Make a transparency of a few of the pages in the book and show proper usage of punctuation and paragraphing. On chart paper, write the story in story format to show how dialogue would be written properly. Students will then take the cartoon and turn it into a story using correct punctuation and paragraphing.

• Divide students into groups. Before class, write each sentence from the book onto sentence strips. Have the groups add correct punctuation to create dialogue. Then as a class, students will come together to share sentence strips. Students then will sequence the story.

• For a lesson on dialogue leads, use the story Wild Child by Lynn Plourde. Give groups a story idea and have the groups think of a dialogue lead for that story idea.

• To discuss internal conflict, give students a scenario such as cheating on a test and have students write internal dialogue or thoughtshot as dialogue. As a class, groups can try to guess what the conflict is.

• As a follow lesson to I-28, have students think of a time when they had a fight or an argument with a family member or friend and write down some dialogue that was being said from both characters.

• Along with the Fletcher Lesson, L-17 (Tighten Dialogue), use the book Mrs. Watson Wants Your Teeth to point out that stories do not have to be completely made up of dialogue. It is important to decide which dialogue would make the story stronger and which dialogue is not important.

• Do a shared writing experience of a fire drill that your class experienced. Write the events and what was said. Then revise and discuss what dialogue is important and dialogue that should be deleted.



Definition: Dialogue is conversation that is written down in a story/piece as if a character were speaking it. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Oh, the Places You’ll Go – Dr. Seuss (one person conversing with reader)

• Meggie Moon – Elizabeth Baguley (dialogue sprinkled throughout) • Sections from most chapter books

Questions to ask:

1. Have you written dialogue that doesn’t develop either your characters or the action of the story?

2. Would your story be stronger without dialogue? 3. How could you “rough up” the dialogue so that it sounds more like

the way people actually talk? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Fletcher – L17 (Tighten Dialogue) L19 (Believable Dialogue – Guidelines for Effectiveness) Lessons: OBJECTIVE: Students will be able to distinguish the different uses of writing with dialogue by comparing various writing genres for its effectiveness in portraying voice through details. Small Group: Use editorial, chapter books, newspaper articles, picture books, magazines. Have students look at how authors use dialogue differently. Whole Group: Come together and discuss findings of small group work and distinguish effective use of dialogue in each. Make list of specific use of dialogue.


Bibliography for Dialogue Aliki, Digging Up Dinosaurs. New York, NY: Harper Collins, 1981. Print. Baguley, Elizabeth. Meggie Moon. Intercource, PA: Good Books, 2005. Print. Bulter, Andrea . Excuses, Excuses. New York, NY: Rigby, 1988. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Primary Units of Writing. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2003. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2006. Print. Cowley, Joy. Greedy Cat is Hungry. Canada: ITP Nelson, 1998. Print. Cowley, Joy. Horace. New York, NY: The Wright Group, 1998. Print. Cowley, Joy. The Hungry Giant. New York, NY: Wright Group, 2000. Print. Cowley, Joy. Mrs. Wishy Washy. New Zeeland: Shortland Publishcations, 2001. Print. Freeman, Don. Corduroy. New York, NY: Viking Books, 1968. Print. Kaufman, Karen. I Wanna Iguana. New York, NY: G.P. Putnam's Sons, 2004. Print. Keats, Ezra Jack. Peter's Chair. New York, NY: Viking Books, 1967. Print. Hawkins, Colin. Pat the Cat. New York, NY: DK Publishing, 1995. Print. Heard, Georgia. The Revision Toolbox. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2002. Print. Leoni, Leo. A Flea Story. New York, NY: Scholastic Inc., 1996. Print. Lichtenheld, Tom. What Are You So Grumpy About?. New York, NY: Little, Brown Young Readers, 2003. Print. McGhee, Alison. Mrs. Watson Wants Your Teeth. Orlando, FL: Harcourt Books, 2004. Print. McKissack, Patricia. Precious and the Boo Hag. New York, New York: Atheneum Books for Young Readers, 2005. Print. McNaughton, Colin. Suddenly!. Orlando, FL: Voyager Books, 1998. Print. Melser, June. Go, Go, Go. New York, NY: The Wright Group, 1991. Print. Melser, June. Little Pig. New York, NY: Wright Group, 1990. Print. Ploude, Lynn. Wild Child. New York, NY: Simon & Schuster, 1999. Print. Polacco, Patricia. Emma Kate. New York, NY: Puffin Books, 2005. Print. Raschka, Chris. Yo! Yes!. New York, NY: Orchard Books, 1993. Print. Seuss, Dr.. Oh, the Places You'll Go. Random House Books for Young Readers. New York, NY, 1993. Print. Shannon, David. David Gets in Trouble. New York, NY: Blue Sky Press, 2002. Print. Shannon, David. David Goes to School. New York, NY: Blue Sky Press, 1999. Print. Simont, Marc. The Stray Dog. New York, NY: Harper Collins , 2001. Print. Stone, John. The Monster at the End of This Book. New York, NY: Random House, 1971. Print.


Williams , Mo. Knuffle Bunny. New York, NY: Hyperion Books, 2004. Print. Williams, Mo. Knuffle Bunny Too. New York, NY: Hyperion Books, 2007. Print. William, Mo. My Friend is Sad. New York, NY: Hyperion Books, 2007. Print.

Setting, Compiled/Created by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, and Grand Blanc Teachers, December 2008.

Setting Adapted from Barry Lane

Setting is the where

and the when.

• Where does your story take place? o How are you going to let your reader

know? Words in the story Picture

• What time of day is the story taking place? • What’s the weather like? • What does it remind you of? • Why is your setting important to your story? • What is your purpose for this setting?

Before you write: • Think • Sketch a place • List a few details


Resources

*Fletcher I-8 Use Plot, Place and Character *Fletcher I-27 Using details to bring the setting alive *Fletcher I-4 Digging up Buried Stories *Fletcher D-27 Control How Time Moves *Fletcher D-29 Develop a Scene Calkins (K-2) Revision Session 8, Show Not Tell

Session 9 Learning More About

*Teaching the Qualities of Writing by Fletcher and Portalupi

Calkins Example

The classroom was a mess Books, papers, and tools were strewn everywhere across the classroom, making the place look rather like a teenager’s bedroom.

Texts to use when teaching setting:

• Tuesday, David Wiesner o More than one setting in a story o Gives the setting using picture clues—

Nighttime • shadows, moon, stars, natural habitat

Daytime • sun, blue sky, green meadows, crowd of people

• The Red Book, Barbara Lehman o Show the title page and pages 1, 2, and 3 o Discuss that readers sometimes have to use the clues to determine the

setting. The author does not always come out and state the setting. o Urban, clothing, snow, sidewalks, traffic, student walking, backpack,

skyscrapers • Dog Team, Gary Paulsen

o Don’t necessarily need to read this book. o Where do you think this story takes place and when?

Brainstorm clues while using evidence in book Predict and/or infer setting as you progress thru the pictures

• Mounds of snow, flashlight, bare trees, dog sleds, dog team—huskies, barren, Northern Lights, wolves, seeing breath in the air, pine trees

• The Spooky Old Tree, Stan and Jan Berenstain o Adjectives that describe the setting

Twisty old stair Spooky old tree

o Without this specific setting the story wouldn’t have the same impact


Type of Detail: Setting

Definition: Describing the surroundings. When and where of story. Trade Books to support/examples of and other suggestions:

• Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs • Miss Bindergarden books • No, David Books • The Snowman. • Tuesday • The Castle Builder • Two Bad Ants • Zoom • The Red Book • The Spooky Old Tree • Knuffle Bunny • Mondo Posters • Draw a picture of your bedroom.

Questions to ask: After we finish this ask the kids what is important to add to details whether we are drawing or writing the details. Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons:

Lessons: Read Miss. Bindergarden Gets Ready for Kindergarten. Then have the students draw and label a picture of their room. When they are finished meet on the rug and model with a student on describing your room. Then let the students partner up and do the same. (Make sure the partner has the student’s picture that is describing the room.) Have students take turns describing their bedrooms. Then have them go back and add any details they may have left off. Extension activity would be to co-construct the classroom setting whole group.


Type of Detail: Setting

Definition: Describing the time and the place using your five senses. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• The Clay Ladies by Michael Bedard • Up North at the Cabin by Marsha Wilson Chall • Spooky Old Tree (Berenstein Bears) – how characters are affected by

setting • The Fox by Margaret Wild • Brave Irene by William Steig • The Very Last First Time by Jan Andrews • Charlotte’s Web • Holes by Louis Satcher • The Sorcerer’s Stone – J.K. Rowlins • When I was Young in the Mountains – Cynthia Rylant

Questions to ask: Where will your story take place? What does that place look like? How does the place sound, feel, and smell? How will your characters be affected by the setting?

Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Fletcher: I-27 Using details to bring the setting alive Fletcher: I-4 Digging up Buried Stories Lessons: See attached lesson (Using photographs to elicit details of the setting) Memory Mapping – Draw a picture of a special place and describe the setting With a partner, read your setting description and have your partner draw it. Artist should circle the key words in the description that helped them to visualize and draw the setting. Sensory Card – Create a card that has physical objects for each of the five senses and write about it.


Bibliography for Setting Andrews, Jan. The Very Last First Time. Toronto: Groundwood Books, 2003. Print. Banyai, Istvan. Zoom. New York, New York: Puffin Books, 1998. Print.

Barrett, Judi. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. New York, New York: Aladdin Books, 1978. Print.

Bedard, Michael. The Cay Ladies. New York, New York: Tundra Books, 2001. Print.

Berenstain, Stan and Jan. The Spooky Old Tree. New York, New York: Random House, 1978. Print.

Briggs, Raymond. The Snowman. New York, New York: Puffin Books, 1998. Print.

Calkins, Lucy. Primary Units of Writing. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2003. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2006. Print. Lane, Barry. The Reviser's Toolkit. Stoneham, Vermont: Discover Writing Press, 1999. Print.

Lehman, Barbara. The Red Book. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 2004. Print.

Nolan, Dennis. The Castle Builder. New York, New York: Aladdin, 1993. Print.

Paulsen, Gary. Dog Team. New York, New York: Dragonfly Books, 1995. Print.

Rowling, J.K.. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. New York, NY: Scholastic Press, 1999. Print. Rylant, Cynthia. When I was Young in the Mountains. New York, NY: Puffin , 1993. Print. Sachar, Louis. Holes. New York, NY: Random House, 2001. Print. Shannon, David. No, David!. New York, New York: Blue Sky Press, 1998. Print.

Slate, Joseph. Miss Bindergarden Books Series. New York, New York: Puffin Books, 1998-2006. Print.

Steig, William. Brave Irene. New York, NY: Farrar, Straus & Giroux, 1988. Print. Van Allsburg, Chris. Two Bad Ants. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1988. Print.

White, E.B.. Charlotte's Web. New York, NY: HarperCollins, 2001. Print. Wiesner, David. Tuesday. New York, New York: Clarion, 1991. Print.

Wild, Margaret. Fox. New York, New York: Kane/Miller Book Publishers, 2006. Print.

Willems, Mo. Knuffle Bunny. New York, New York: Hyperion Books, 2004. Print.

Wilson Chall, Marsha. Up North at the Cabin. New York, New York: HarperCollins, 1992. Print.

Thoughtshots, Compiled/Created by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, and Grand Blanc Teachers, December 2008

Thoughtshots/Internal Thinking A thoughtshot in fiction is simply a look at what a character is thinking or feeling. It gives the reader and writer a reason to be interested. (Barry Lane) What am I thinking or feeling? • I wonder…. • I think…. • I pondered….. • I’ll bet….. • I predict…. • I expect….

• I understand… • I wish…. • I noticed… • I remembered…. • I felt….. • I know….


Resources

Calkins (K-2) Small Moments #2 Session 12 Revealing Internal Stories Calkins (3-5) Raising the Quality #2 Session 3 Starting With Strong

Feelings Session 8 Bringing Forth the Internal

Story Session 10 Adding Scenes from the

Past and Future *Fletcher I-24 Develop the Inner Story *Fletcher I-28 Work with An External Conflict *Fletcher I-29 Work With An Internal Conflict *Teaching the Qualities of Writing by Fletcher and Portalupi

Calkins Example At my birthday party I blew out the candles and everyone sang happy birthday to me.

At my birthday party I got to blow out my candles the day reminded me of a holiday everyone sang happy birthday. I didn’t know whether to sit there or sing to. So I sang to myself it was embarrassing but nice.

Types of Thoughtshots

In fiction writing, thoughtshots can be divided into different categories: • Flashbacks • Flash Forwards • Internal dialogue.

Below you’ll find some examples from Barry Lane. Next time you write a story, look for opportunities to explore these types of thoughtshots.

1. Flashback: She remembered the day he came for the first time. He was a little boy then…

2. Flash-ahead: She thought about her options. She could sit there and pretend it never happened. She could tell him everything. She could buy a plane ticket to Bermuda with the money…

3. Internal Monologue or Dialogue: a. There was no way she could do it. She knew that, but still her feet kept

moving, one step after another. She thought about why she was doing this but there was no way she could make sense of it…


Thoughtshots are usually found in first sentences of paragraphs. They are the skeleton on which the facts and examples are hung and from which unanswered questions grow. (BL) “Christmas Story” – This movie has great examples of thoughtshots. The main character is constantly thinking aloud.

Websites http://kids.nationalgeographic.com/Activities/Cartoons/Cartoonwizard?vgnextfmt=alternate http://www.readwritethink.org/lessons/lesson_view.asp?id=1129 http://www.buildyourwildself.com/

Texts to Teach Thoughtshots/Internal Thinking

• Wordless picture books • Fly Away Home, Eve Bunting

o The Medinas’ understand …Pg. 22 o I know….Pg. 26 o I think….Pg. 30 o I remember….Pg. 32

• Amelia Bedelia books o Amelia’s thoughtshots/internal thinking is done mainly through dialogue

• The Summer My Father Was Ten, Pat Brisson (thoughtshots in 3rd person) o And my father thought, Boy, I’d like to see Nicky’s face if I throw a tomato

instead of the ball, and he hit it and it splattered all over him! o …he realized what they had done. o …he remembered and wanted to tell him he was sorry, but he just couldn’t

make the words come out. • Elmer, David McKee

o But Elmer himself wasn’t happy. “Whoever heard of a patchwork elephant?” he thought. “No wonder they laugh at me!”

o As he stood there, Elmer felt that something was wrong. But what? • Sand Cake, Frank Asch

o All the time Baby Bear was swimming, he kept wondering, “How will I ever be able to eat that cake?” Pg. 30


Type of Detail Thoughtshots

Definition: What a person or character is thinking or feeling. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Who Will Tuck Me in Tonight by Carol Roth Questions to ask:

• What do you think ___________ is feeling? • What do you think ___________ is thinking?

Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Calkins Small Moments Lesson 12: Internal/External Thinking

Lessons: Read the book. Discuss how the lamb felt at the beginning and end of the story.

1. Each student writes a thoughtshot of lamb’s feelings at the beginning and end.

2. Pairs of students work together- one does beginning and one does ending.


Type of Detail: Thoughtshots

Definition: What a character is thinking or feeling. Examples include, but are not limited to, internal dialogue, flashbacks, flash-forwards Trade Books to support/examples of: The Report Card – Andrew Clements Elmer—David McKee A Week in the Woods – Andrew Clements The Museum Trip—Barbara Lehman Fly Away Home – Eve Bunting Train to Somewhere – Eve Bunting The Wall – Eve Bunting The Lady in the Box – Ann McGovern No, David – David Shannon Sister Ann’s Hands Flipped – (Point of View) The Red Book – Barbara Lehman The Wretched Stone – Chris VanAllsburg The Memory String – Eve Bunting The Summer My Father Was Ten – Pat Brisson

Questions to ask: What is the character thinking? What does that remind the character of? How is the character feeling? When have I had this feeling? What if this happens…? What will happen when…? I wonder… I wish…. I think… I noticed…. I pondered… I remembered…. I’ll bet… I felt…. I expect… I know….. I understand…

Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Fletcher I-24 – Develop the Inner Story Fletcher I-29 – Work with an Internal Conflict Lessons: Read, No David, by David Shannon. Have students write character thoughtshots for each page as the story progresses. Using picture books without words, stop at different places throughout the text and have students reflect on character thought shots.


Bibliography for Thoughtshots

Asch, Frank. Sand Cake. New York, New York: Crown Books for Young Readers, 1987. Print. Brisson, Pat. The Summer My Father Was Ten. New York, New York: Boyds Mills Press, 1998. Print. Bunting, Eve. Fly Away Home. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1991. Print. Bunting, Eve. The Memory String. New York, New York: Clarion Books, 2000. Print. Bunting, Eve. Train to Somewhere. New York, New York: Sandpiper, 2000. Print. Bunting, Eve. The Wall. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1990. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Primary Units of Writing. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2003. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2006. Print. Clements, Andrew. The Report Card. New York, New York: Simon & Schuster, 2004. Print. Clements, Andrew. A Week in the Woods. New York, New York: Atheneum, 2004. Print. Lane, Barry. The Reviser's Toolkit. Stoneham, Vermont: Discover Writing Press, 1999. Print.

Lehman, Barbara. The Red Book. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 2004. Print. Lehman, Barbara. The Museum Trip. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 2006. Print. Lorbiecki, Marybeth. Sister Ann's Hands. New York, New York: Puffin, 2000. Print. McGovern, Ann. The Lady in the Box. First. New York, New York: Turtle Books, 1997. Print. McKee, David. Elmer. New York, New York: Lothrop, Lee & Shepard Books, 1968. Print. Parish, Margaret. Amelia Bedelia Series. New York, New York: Harper Collins, 1994-2005. Print. Roth, Carol. Who Will Tuck Me In Tonight. New York, New York: North-south Books, 2008. Print. Shannon, David. No, David. New York, New York: Scholastic, 1998. Print. VanAllsburg, Chris. The Wretched Stone. New York, New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1991. Print Van Draanen, Wendelin. Flipped. New York, New York: Knopf Books for Young Readers, 2003. Print.

Character Action, Created/Compiled by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, and Grand Blanc Teachers, December 2008.

Character Actions

Character Actions are the how and the what. They tell about

what characters are doing and how they are doing it. Action should reveal something about the character.

The verbs you choose will make a BIG difference

in the kind of picture a reader gets. (Fletcher)

The Relatives Came Then it was hugging time. Talk about hugging! Those relatives just passed us all around their car, pulling us against their wrinkled Virginia clothes, crying sometimes. They hugged us for hours. Then it was into the house and so much laughing and shining faces and hugging the doorways. You’d have to go through at least four different hugs to get from the

kitchen to the front room. Those relatives!

The Harmonica I stood before him, my hands numb with winter. What if I fumbled? What if I ran out of breath? What if the notes rushed from my head? Inside I trembled like a hare crouched in a bush. I had no doubt, if I faltered, I would be dead.

Bad Dog Marley Marley ate the buttons off jackets and the laces off shoes. He tipped over his water bowl and raided the trash. He pulled the toilet paper off the roll and the turkey out of the oven. He chewed Mommy’s reading glasses and swallowed Daddy’s paycheck.


Resources

Calkins (K-2) Revision #4 Session 8, 9 Showing Not Telling Calkins (K-2) Authors #5 Session 14 Turning To Authors for Specific

Help Calkins (3-5) Writing Fiction #4 Session 3 Developing Believable Characters Calkins (3-5) Writing Fiction #4 Session 4 Giving Characters Struggles and

Motivations Calkins (3-5) Writing Fiction #4 Session 6 Show Don’t Tell *Fletcher L-23 Use Verbs That Describe Actions *Fletcher I-25 Develop Your Character *Fletcher I-22 Bring Your Characters to Life *Fletcher L-16 Avoid Passive Verbs *Fletcher L-20 Use a Thesaurus to Find Just the Right Word Steve Peha www.ttms.org The Ideas-Details Strategy p.29 The Tell-Show Strategy p. 34


Calkins Examples Tell Show

We lost I was sad. We lost. I walked slowly along, my head down, my hands in my pockets, dragging my feet along the ground.

The cute frisky dog looked at me.

The dog caught a leaf and turned a somersault. Then it spun around in a circle.

I was really excited and nervous.

I kept going to the window every five seconds to check and see if the taxi was there yet. I thought every little sound in the hallway might be him. I was so jumpy that when the phone rang I nearly fell off my chair. My feet kept tapping and I read the same sentence in my book six times in a row!

I was happy. I skipped all the way, humming glad songs as if my heart would burst. A girl climbs a mountain by herself and she’s proud.

A 9 year old girl has a knee injury and will never be able to bend her knee. At first she gives me up on life but then something happens to change this and she decides to not give up anymore. To prove herself she sets out to climb the mountain that overlooks her house. She doesn’t get to top but she proves herself in a different way and learns something, I am not sure the specifics.

I got home. I was exhausted. I went to bed. (character action, with thought shot)

I flicked on the light so that I could see my way to my bed. It looked like it was miles away from where I was standing. I closed my eyes. I wanted more than anything to be carried to my bed. Instead, I had to walk. I dropped my backpack on the floor with a thud. Then I used my feet to pry off first one shoes, then the other. The idea of bending over to untie them was just too exhausting. I trudged to the edge of my bed, step by step. “You can make it, just a few more steps,” I told myself. Then I was there. I began to fall onto my bed, unable to even pull the covers back. My eyes closed as I fell. The last thought I had before I fell asleep was, “I should have taken off my jacket.”


Trash Can Poster: Write word students are “throwing away” in then center or on a piece of paper in the trash can. Write “replacement” words around the trash can.

RIP: Words students overuse can be moved to the Dead Word Wall (RIP).Write “dead” words on tombstone. Write “replacement” words around the tombstone.

Texts to Teach Character Action

• The Paper Bag Princess, Robert Munsch o Unfortunately a dragon smashed her castle, burned all her clothes

with his fiery breath, and carried off Prince Ronald. • The Goose’s Story, Cari Best

o See attached sheet for ideas • Fox, Margaret Wild and Ron Brooks

o Magpie feels the wind streaming through her feathers, and she rejoices.

o He flickers through the trees like a tongue of fire, and Magpie trembles.

o Fox runs so fast that his feet scarcely touch the ground, and Magpie exults, “At last I am flying. Really Flying!”

• Hello Toes! Hello Feet!, Ann Whitford Paul o Squish into the muddy ooze. o Shuffle through the pile of leaves. o Stamp my juice can! o Clump down the hall, clomp down the stairs.

• Snowflake Bentley • Ruby the Copy Cat • Mike Mulligan and HIs Steam Shovel By Virginia Lee Burton

Telling Showing The steam engine was digging fast Dirt was flying everywhere, and the

smoke and steam were so thick the people could hardly see.


Strong Verbs:

Words to replace said: Uttered Demanded Cheered Mumbled Whispered Yelled Shouted Declared Replied

Words to replace went: Sauntered Strolled Skid addled Roamed Followed Traveled Wandered Roved Raced Marched Trotted Skipped Meandered

Words to replace look: Glance Gaze Glare Stare Watch Ogle Observe Squint Gawk Glimpse Peek




a accused acknowledged added addressed admitted advertised advised affirmed allowed alluded announced answered apologized appealed applauded argued asked asserted assured b babbled barked barked bawled beamed beefed began begged bellowed bellyached beseeched blamed blubbered bluffed blurted boasted bragged

breathed bubbled burst c cackled called calmed cautioned censured challenged chanted charged chastened chattered cheered chided chimed in chirped chuckled claimed clamored clarified clucked coaxed comforted commanded commended commented complained complimented conceded concurred condemned confessed congratulated considered consoled contended

continued contradicted

counseled creaked cried criticized crooned d declared defined demanded denied denounced described detailed dictated directed disclosed discussed divulged doubted droned e echoed encouraged ended entreated exaggerated explained exploded expounded expressed


f faltered fibbed g gabbed gasped giggled gossiped grinned griped groaned groused grumbled grunted guessed gulped gushed h harped heckled hem and haw hesitated hinted hissed hollered hooted howled huffed i implied implored indicated informed inquired insinuated insisted instructed insulted interjected interrupted invited

j jabbered jeered jibed joined in joked judged k kidded lamented lauded laughed lectured lied lisped m maintained marveled mentioned mimicked moaned mocked mourned moved mumbled murmured mused muttered

n nagged noticed notified o objected observed offered opinion ordered outburst p panted

parroted persisted persuaded piped pleaded pointed out pondered praised prayed prescribed pressed pressured proceeded proclaimed professed proposed protested purred puzzled q queried questioned quipped quizzed quoted r ragged railed rambled on ranted rattled on raved reasoned reassured recalled recited recommended recounted reflected refused rehearsed reiterated rejoiced related remarked


remembered repeated reported reprimanded requested responded restated retorted returned revealed ribbed ridiculed roared rooted s sang sassed scoffed scolded scorned screamed screeched shouted shrieked shot back shuddered sighed slammed

slipped snapped snarled snickered sniffed snipped sniveled snorted snubbed sobbed soothed speculated spewed spilled spit spoke sputtered squeaked stammered stated stuttered submitted suggested t taunted teased tempted testified

thought thundered told trilled trumpeted u urged uttered v voiced w wailed warned went on wheezed whimpered whispered whooped wondered y yelled yielded yowled


Type of Detail Character Action

Definition: The how and the what. They tell what characters are doing and how they are doing it. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch • The Goose’ Story by Cari Best • Hello Toes, Hello Feet by Ann Whitford Paul • Fox by Margaret Wild and Ron Brooks

Questions to ask: What word could you use instead of said? What word could you use instead of went? What word could you use instead of look? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Calkins Small Moments Lesson 7: Planning Details

Lessons: Write several character actions on sentence strips. Students choose a strip and act out the different character actions. Write the different character actions on a chart.


Type of Detail: Character Action Definition: Bring your character to life through their actions. Breathing life into the character. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• The Goose’s Story – Cari Best Questions to ask:

• What is a verb? • How does a verb describe what the character is doing?

Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: Fletcher

• L23 – Use Verbs that Describe Action • L16 – Passive Verbs was/were

Lessons: OBJECTIVE: Students will be able to identify verbs that lend themselves to bring the characters alive. Read story. Pass out page from the book. Circle all verbs. List names of characters on 3 column chart. Discuss verbs. Put verbs under the character name that it is describing. Ask ‘How did you know that verb described that character?’ and discuss. Follow Up – Create a verb bank that relates to their topic that they will be writing about (i.e. Basketball story – make “basketball” word bank)


Goose’s Story By Cari Best

They land in couples and stand in threes and band together in bunches like people. Old geese, young geese, grandmas, uncles, cousins, and nieces. Each one painted in black and white and gray and brown. Some geese sit and some geese sleep. Some drink and bathe and swim and sun. Pecking and nibbling, they celebrate spring. All afternoon. Then Henry breaks free to take back his pond. And the Sunday geese jump for the sky. Their wings spread wider than my arms can reach. Their legs tuck under like airplane wheels. There is honking and barking – and giggles from me. Until I see her. One goose alone. She doesn’t flutter her feathers or hiss at Henry. She doesn’t stretch out her neck. And she doesn’t fly away. “Go?” I shout and stamp my boots. But the goose doesn’t move. She stares at us and we stare at her. First at what is right about her. And then at what is wrong. “It’s your foot!” I whisper. And then I can’t move either.


Type of Detail: Character Action

Definition: Using words to create pictures of a character’s actions in a reader’s mind. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Wet Dog by Elise Broach • David Goes to School by David Shannon • Whoo-oo Is It? By Megan McDonald

Questions to ask: Can you point to a place in your writing where you describe your character using one of the five senses? What details could you add or change to make a character seem more realistic and believable? Reread your writing what things do you notice that make your characters come alive as real people or animals? Can you point to a place in your writing where one character reacts to another? Where have you used an ordinary verb in your writing that you could replace with a stronger verb? Can the reader visualize your character’s actions? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: L-23 Use Verbs That Describe Action I-25 Develop Your Characters I-22 Bring Your Characters to Life L-16 Avoid Passive Verbs L-20 Use a Thesaurus to Find Just the Right Word Peha p. 29 The Ideas-Details Strategy Peha p. 34 The Tell-Show Strategy


Lessons:

• Have students find a place in their writing where they are describing a character’s action. Students will then find a partner and read that section of their paper to their partner. The partner draws the character’s action according to what has been read. If the picture does not depict what the writer intended, then the writer needs to add more details/precise verbs that describe that action.

• Show pictures from David Goes to School by David Shannon. Have students write a description of the David’s action and share. Discuss ways to improve descriptions by using more precise verbs.

• Have students go on a “Character Action Hunt”. Students can look for description of character’s actions in the books they are reading independently and share.

• Pass out photographs of characters doing an action (playing baseball, talking, etc.). Have students write about what is happening in the picture by describing the action of the character.

• To describe action through noise, read Whoo-oo Is It? By Megan McDonald. The sounds of the animals are helping to describe the action.

• To help students use more precise verbs, have students divide into groups. Give each group a word that needs to be “Put to Rest…RIP”. Have students brainstorm words that can replace these words. Then, throughout the week have students find words to replace these words in their daily reading. To extend this lesson, teach L-16 (Avoid Passive Verbs) and L-20 (Use a Thesaurus) from the Fletcher Series.

Books to use for powerful verbs:

• The Umbrella by Jan Brett • The Three Little Wolves and the Big Bad Pig by Eugene Trivizas • The Perfect Nest by Catherine Friend • Wild About Books by Judy Sierra • The Dog Who Cried Wolf by Keiko Kasza • Pindula by Janell Cannon • Honey...Honey…Lion! by Jan Brett


Bibliography for Character Actions

Best, Cari. The Goose's Story. 1. New York, NY: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2002. Print. Brett, Jan. Honey ...Honey...Lion!. New York, NY: G.P. Putnam's Sons, 2005. Print. Brett, Jan. The Umbrella. New York, NY: G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 2004. Print. Briggs Martin, Jacqueline. Snowflake Bentley. New York, NY: Houghton Mifflin, Co., 1998. Print. Broach, Elise. Wet Dog. New York, NY: Puffin, 2007. Print. Burton, Virginia Lee. Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel. New York, NY: Houghton Mifflin, 1977. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Primary Units of Writing. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2003. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2006. Print. Cannon, Janell. Pinduli. New York, NY: Harcourt, 2004. Print. Friend, Catherine. The Perfect Nest. London, UK: Walker Books, Ltd., 2007. Print. Grogan, John. Bad Dog, Marley!. 1. New York, NY: Harper Collins Children's Books, 2007. Print. Johnston, Tony. The Harmonica. 1. Watertown, MA: Charlesbridge Publishing , 2008. Print. Kasza, Keiko. The Dog Who Cried Wolf. New York, NY: Peguin Group, 2005. Print. McDonald, Megan. Whoo-oo Is It? New York, NY: Orchard Paperbacks, 1997. Print. Munsch, Robert. The Paper Bag Princess. Annicle Press: Buffalo, NY, 1980. Print. Rathmann, Peggy. Ruby the Copycat. New York, NY: Scholastic, 1997. Print. Rylant, Cynthia. The Relatives Came. New York, NY: Simon and Schuster Children's Publishing Division, 1985. Print. Shannon, David. David Goes to School. New York, NY: Blue Sky Press, 1999. Print. Sierra, Judy. Wild About Books. New York, NY: Knopf Books for Young Readers, 2004. Print. Trivizas, Eugene. The Three Little Wolves and the Big Bad Pig. DuBois, PA: Mammoth Press, Inc., 1993. Print. Whitford Paul, Ann. Hello Toes! Hello Feet!. 1. New York, NY: DK Children, 2000. Print. Wild, Margaret, and Ron Brooks. Fox. La Jolla, CA: Kane/Miller Book Publishers , 2006. Print.

Physical Description, Compiled/Created by Melissa Wing, Genesee Intermediate School District, Aimee Lynes and Char Sobanski, Grand Blanc Schools, and Grand Blanc Teachers, December 2008

Physical Description Through writing, create a picture for the reader using descriptive sensory words. Use all of your senses to help you describe. Help your readers visualize your story.

As writers we need to use our sensory images. We put on the shoes of the character. We need to crack our stories open. Show, Don’t Tell. Our stories usually get

longer. I am tired. = My eyes were drooping and I could barely keep them open. I kept yawning and yawning and all I could think about was my soft, fluffy pillow and my warm, cozy bed.


Resources

Calkins (K-2) Revision #4 Session 8, 9 Show Not Tell *Fletcher I-25 Develop Your Characters *Fletcher I-23 Describe What Characters Look Like


Lessons

Make a list of 43 words that describe you, a friend, a family member, a teacher, etc. Poetry Guess

Books/Resources:

• Where the Wild Things Are, Maurice Sendak o And when he came to the place where the wild things are they roared

their terrible roars and gnashed their terrible teeth and rolled their terrible eyes and showed their terrible claws.

• The Relatives Came, Cynthia Rylant o The relatives weren’t particular about beds, which was good since there

weren’t any extras, so a few squeezed in with us and the rest slept on the floor, some with their arms thrown over the closest person, or some with an arm across one person and a leg across another.

• Owl Moon, Jane Yolen o We went into the woods. The shadows were the blackest things I had

ever seen. They stained the white snow. My mouth felt furry, for the scarf over it was wet and warm. I didn’t ask what kinds of things hide behind black trees in the middle of the night. When you go owling you have to be brave.

• The Important Book, Margaret Wise Brown • Fly Away Home, Eve Bunting

o He and I wear blue jeans and blue T-shirts and blue jackets. We each have a blue zippered bag with a change of blue clothes. Not to be noticed is to look like nobody at all.

• Cherries and Cherry Pits, Vera B. Williams o THIS is the door to the subway and THIS is a man leaning on the door. I

hope he doesn’t fall out when the door opens all of a sudden. His face is a nice face. But it is also not so nice. He has a fat wrinkle on his forehead. It’s like my mother’s wrinkle. It’s from worrying and worrying, my mother says. And his neck is thick and his arms are thick with very big, strong muscles. His shirt is striped blue and white and his skin is dark brown and in his great big hands he has a small white bag. This man looks so strong I think he could even carry a piano on his head. But he is only carrying this little white bag I wonder what can be in that little bag. *(Don’t show students the picture on this page. Have each student draw the man while you read the description of him.)


Websites http://www.buildyourwildself.com/ http://www.escapepress.com/descriptiveWords.html http://www.msgarrettonline.com/descripwords.html http://www.kisd.org/khs/english/help%20page/Descriptive%20Words.htm http://career.truman.edu/student/actionword.asp http://www.talkeasy.co.uk/link/materials/esl11.html

List of Descriptive Words for Characters You can use the following words to help you show, don’t tell.

clever confident courageous demanding determined easy-going eccentric efficient energetic emotional enthusiastic exuberant firm flexible forgiving frank friendly generous gentle good-natured healthy helpful honest hopeful humble humorous

imaginative independent individualistic industrious insightful intelligent inventive kind likable logical loyal methodical modest motivated open-minded optimistic practical precise prudent purposeful quiet quick-witted realistic reliable resourceful responsible

self-confident selfless sensible serious sincere smart sociable spontaneous strong-willed tenacious thorough thoughtful tolerant trusting trustworthy unconventional understanding verbal versatile visionary wise witty zan


Cut out some pictures of people from magazines - pop stars, sportsmen, TV stars.

Exercises:

1. Use the lists below to describe their appearance or how they look. 2. In pairs: one student can write down a description from a picture and the other

student must guess who it is. 3. Describe yourself, another student, your Teacher.

Height Build Age

tall, tallish, short, shortish, medium height

frail, stocky, slim, thin, plump, fat, skinny, well-built

young, elderly, middle-aged, teenager, in 20s, 30s, 40s

Face Eyes Hair Clothes

round, oval, square, with scares, wrinkles, freckles, sun-tanned, pale

big round blue eyes, large, small, bright, narrow

bald, straight, curly, spiky, wavy

casual, scruffy, shabby, smart, tidy, messy

http://www.talkeasy.co.uk/link/materials/esl11.html


Describing Character - What's he like? Is she nice?

Exercises:

1. Use the words below to describe what your friends, family and teachers are like.

2. In pairs: one student writes down a description and the other student must guess who it is.

http://www.talkeasy.co.uk/link/materials/esl11.html

careful, hard-working, worried, cheerful, broadminded, active, curious, secretive

aggressive, tough, careless, practical, sensible, independent, strong-minded, stupid

dull, boring, imaginative, ambitious, crafty, sensitive, gentle, naïve

generous, loyal, self-controlled, moody, trusting, modest, tolerant, friendly

energetic, confident, selfish, shy, stubborn, reliable, clumsy, intelligent


SOUND

ringing cheeping Gasping smashing piercing Peeping whooping tinkling Raucous chattering crooning Bellowing Sobbing bumping snarling growling pitch crying thumping burping Croaking clattering yapping Keening splashing yelping Rustling volume squealing Howling Barking sniveling Moaning pealing tone Rattling Grunting clanging Coughing quacking whining Gagging Fizzing wheezing honking hissing bawling trumpeting Swishing sneezing Rumbling bubbling ripping Cooing Chirping shouting Shuffling tearing popping roaring Thunderous scratching Snorting crashing crunching Cackling tolling clucking Silent tapping soothing Crowing Tranquil melodious cacophonous singing quiet Tune Loud tinkling Noisy rhythmic mumbling Twittering Din beat Blaring cawing racket Chattering Murmuring whistling Clapping booming whispering Mewing Snapping snoring Yelling mooing crackling Sighing

TOUCH AND TEXTURE

http://www.msgarrettonline.com/descripwords.html

Pressed damp Fluted tickling sculptured Dry Knobbed raw Corrugated downy chapped Scratchy Dirty grimy Sopping itching abrasive Dusty Scaled rasping Prickly clammy pulpy Kiss Scarred glossy Wet pocked tweedy Matte Moist woolly Hard foamy dank Patina Gripped burning Hairy Soft cottony Scorching Furry bumpy Rocking cushioned fluffy Searing Fuzzy boiling Sheer sheen scalding Stinging Sandy warm Shiny polished hot Engraved Gritty inlaid Soapy bubbly grooved Cool Glassy ivory Biting sharp rutted Piercing Silky numbing Velvety smooth freezing Steely Keen icy Corduroy grainy cold Metallic Fine waxy Coarse greasy curdled Slimy Splintered lacy Tangled spiky slippery Creamy Matted slick Shaggy bushy fiery Stubbly


COLOR AND VISUAL QUALITIES

Red Saffron Bright dark scarlet Gold

Dull Light Carnelian silver rose Chocolate

Crimson Chrome Lilac sienna salmon Lime

Copper Vermilion Yellow bronze avocado Coral

Primrose Pale Purple lemon canary Violet

Pink Cerise Mauve ruddy mahogany Topaz

Blue Amber Ebony flushed maroon Amethyst

Crystalline Cyan Navy wine white Poppy

Cobalt Burgundy Olive fuchsia turquoise Claret

Drab Chartreuse Orchid brilliant clear Black

Obsidian Transparent Khaki opaque translucent Lavender

glassy Jet Gay rust carmine Sapphire

Dun Cordovan Indigo milky Tan Grizzly

Ocher Flesh Buff brindle umber Peach

Mustard Ultramarine Snowy chestnut green Smoky

Sepia Mint Brass walnut pearl aqua

Ruby Emerald Twinkling bistre sooty shimmering

Jade Plum Charcoal maize lake iridescent

Garnet Slate Spruce puce magenta sable

Pearly Aquamarine Ivory henna citrine onyx

Azure Cream Orange

SMELL

Perfumed lilac Earthy stinking fetid loamy Lemon scent Odor fragrance sweaty sharp Rose lime Rotten Biting pungent musty Plastic acrid Flowery Fishy mildewed spicy Acid moldy Doggy nauseating redolent skunky Dirty sweet Tart Minty moist putrid Sour fresh Musty spoiled

http://www.msgarrettonline.com/descripwords.html


PATTERN AND SHAPE

round Parallel Narrow reticulated crested wide Flat Spherical Globe rounded shallow drooping Erect Dappled Rolling Orb hemisphere ball Shapely Checkered Adjacent curved pied concentric Triangle Sharp Short depressed swollen long Concave Pyramid Cone convex streamlined sunken Square Diagonal Contoured protruding banded terrain Horizontal Rectangle Cube vertical aquiline veined Cylinder Depth Disc palmate box width Plate Pinnate Spiked thread height arc Elliptical Length worm-like crowned cupped serpentine Girth Crescent Pentagon breadth sinuous baggy Tight Winding Spotted oval hexagon octagon tetrahedral Solid Lanky corkscrew helix curly Frail Polyhedron Trapezoid thin fat crystalline Fanned Oval Pointed plump ovate ellipsoidal http://www.msgarrettonline.com/descripwords.html


Objective: Help students understand the importance of writing with details and examples to adequately develop and support the ideas and content. W.PS.04.01 exhibit personal style and voice to enhance the written message (e.g., in narrative text: strong verbs, figurative language, sensory images; in informational text: precision, established importance, transitions). W.PR.04.01 set a purpose, consider audience, and replicate authors’ styles and patterns when writing a narrative or informational piece. Materials: Nametags, markers, pencils, note cards, writing paper, photographs, details hand Procedures:

• Explain details hand. Today we are going to work on Physical description of a person, place or thing.

• Vaguely describe my dog. Allow children to guess which dog is mine. • After children have difficulty picking out my dog, stimulate a discussion as to why they

were unable to pick out my dog. • Describe my dog in vivid detail. Have children try to pick out my dog a second time. • Ask children why this time they were able to all agree upon which dog is mine. • Discuss importance of using details in writing so that they reader can get a picture in their

minds. • Have children each select a “secret dog”. Their task is to describe their dog using full

sentences, and including enough details so that everybody will know which is their “secret dog”.

• One at a time children read the description of their secret dog while others guess which one they wrote about.

• Remind students that every day in their writing they need to make sure to include plenty of details such as physical description of a person, place or thing in order to paint a picture in their readers minds.

• Could use this as the scenario for the audience of who you are writing for…

The Lost Dog

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Sitting on the porch was a lost dog. I hurried into the house and yelled to my mom. “Can I keep him?” I asked my mom. “Please, mom, please.” My mom told me to call my dad and ask him. I hurried to the phone and called him. He said he didn’t like ugly dogs, so he wanted me to tell him all about him. So I told my dad


Type of Detail: Physical Description Definition: Physical description of a person, place or thing Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Barthello’s, Janie DeVos • Barthello’s Wing! The Tale of a Very Brave Bug • The Big Green Monster • Cherries and Cherry Pits, Vera B. Williams • Pickles to Pittsburg • The Sandcastle, Dennis Nolan

Questions to ask:

• What do bugs look like? • How many legs? • How many toes? • Where do bugs live? • Do they have families? • Are they scared of anything? • How do they get around? • What does the word brave mean?

Calkins Detail Lessons: Show Don’t Tell Lessons:

• Cover picture of bug on cover. • Ask questions such as: What do bugs look like? How many legs? How

many toes? Where do bugs live? Do they have families? Are they scared of anything? How do they get around? What does the word brave mean?

• Read first two pages of Barthello’s Wing. • Tell students that they are going to draw Barthello after you read it one

more time. • Read Barthello a second time. • Have students draw Barthello. • Pair/Share with buddy and compare drawings. • Discuss why most children’s drawings appeared the same.


Type of Detail: Physical Description

Definition: Physical description of a person, place or thing Trade Books to support/examples of:

• The Important Book, Margaret Wise Brown • Any poetry that is very descriptive.

Questions to ask:

• What is being described? • How do you know?

Lessons:

• Have students have white boards or writer’s notebooks out. • Read a poem at least two times leaving out the word (rain) that is being

described. --The _____ was beating down on the roof. --The _____caused puddles of water to form on the sidewalk. • Have students guess what you are describing and write down what they

think. • Talk about what they thought and how they knew. • Repeat. • You may use progressively more difficult poems for older grades.


Type of Detail- Physical Description of a THING

Definition: Physical Description of a thing (What) Through writing, create a picture of something using descriptive words. Trade Books to support/examples of:

• Mud by Marylyn Ray • Wet Dog! By Elise Broach • Baby Bat’s Lullaby by Mitchard

Questions to ask: Day 1: “Bag of Senses” What do you hear, touch, smell? (Can only reach in and touch the object) Can you use ALL your senses for this? Day 2: Using student writing samples on an overhead, students guess what gift is being described. Day 3: Ask students what details they added after telling their story three times. (Refer to re-reading when writing) Fletcher Detail Lessons:

Refer to L-24 in Fletcher for additional references

Lessons: Day 1: “Bag of Senses” Students write down several words that describe the objects in a bag using their senses. Day 2: “My Gift Ever” Write a paragraph about your best gift ever without TELLING what it is. (Showing not Telling) Day 3: “Inside-Outside” Day. Using the Best Gift Ever descriptive paragraph, students add details in their minds, to create a story.

Have students form two circles/Inside circle stands and faces outside circle people. (Could be boys vs. girls)

The inside people TELL their story to three separate outside people. (The inside people are the only ones to MOVE after your signal)

Then they trade places so that the outside people are now inside and get to tell their story three times.

They then go back to seats and write the story they just told to others.


Type of Detail: Physical Description-Characters

Definition: Physical Description-Bringing life to characters in stories Trade Books to support/examples of: (Recommended in Fletcher)

• Out of the Dust (Pg. 1 describes Billie Joe) by Hesse • Julie of the Wolves (Pg. 8 describes Miyax) by Jean George • Fox by Wild • Verdi by Cannon

(Other Trade Books to use)

• Wet Dog! By Elise Broach • A Chair for My Mother by Williams • The Gardener by Stewart • Up North at the Cabin by Chall

Questions to ask: Lesson I-22: Ask how the author brings the character to life in Flying Solo. Beginning is indirect(inferred) description through dialogue. The second area is author description using direct description. Lesson I-23: What did you like about the description? Be specific. Lesson I-25: How does the author use action, description, dialogue, and reaction of other characters? Calkins/Fletcher Detail Lessons: I-22: Bringing Your Characters to Life I-23: Describe What Your Characters Look Like I-25: Develop Your Characters Using 4 Techniques.

Lessons: Day 1: Follow I-22 in Fletcher Day 2: Follow I-23 in Fletcher Day 3: Follow I-25 in Fletcher


Bibliography for Physical Description

Barrett, Judi. Pickles to Pittsburgh. New York,NY: Simon & Schuster, 1997. Print. Broach, Elise. Wet Dog!. New York, NY: Penguin Group, 2005. Print. Brown, Margaret Wise. The Important Book. New York, NY: Harper Collins, 1949. Print. Bunting, Eve. Fly Away Home. New York, NY: Clarion Books, 1991. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Primary Units of Writing. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2003. Print. Calkins, Lucy. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5. Portsmouth, New Hampshire: Heinemann, 2006. Print. Cannon, Janell. Verdi. Orlando, FL: Harcourt Brace & Company, 1997. Print. Chall, Marsha Wilson. Up North at the Cabin. New York, NY: Lethrop, Lee & Shepard Books, 1992. Print. DeVos, Janie. Barthello's Wing: The Tale of a Very Brave Bug. Syosett, NY: East End Publishing, 2006. Print. Emberley, Ed. Go Away, Big Green Monster!. New York, NY: Little, Brown & Company, 1992. Print. George, Jean Craighead. Julie of the Wolves. New York, NY: Harper Collins PUblishers, 1972. Print. Hesse, Karen. Out of the Dust. New York, NY: Scholastic, Inc., 1997. Print. Mitchard, Jacquelyn. Baby Bat's Lullaby. New York, NY: Harper Collins Publishing, 2004. Print. Nolan, Dennis. The Castle Builder: Story and Pictures. New York, NY: Simon & Shuster, 1987. Print. Ray, MaryLyn. Mud. Orlando, FL: First Voyager Books, 1996. Print. Rylant, Cynthia. The Relatives Came. New York, NY: Simon & Schuster, 1985. Print. Sendak, Maurice. Where the Wild Things Are. 25th Anniversary. New York, NY: Harper Collins Publishers, 1988. Print. Stewart, Sarah. The Gardener. New York, NY: Square Fish, 2007. Print. Wild, Margaret. Fox. La Jolla, CA: Kane/Miller Book Publishers, 2006. Print. Williams, Vera. Cherries and Cherry Pits. New York, NY: Greenwillow Books, 1991. Print. Williams, Vera B.. A Chair for My Mother. New York, NY: Greenwillow Books, 1984. Print.

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(810) 591-4400 TTY (810) 591-4545

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To order bound copies of this document contact: Melissa Wing, K-2 Early Literacy and Math Coordinator, Office of Education and Learning by phone (810) 591-4322 or email

[email protected]

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