Doctor Who Episodes

7/25/2019 Doctor Who Episodes

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The Tardis is parked in the living room for a change. The Doctor is in the tinykitchen watching Clara's washing spinning in the machine whilst she checks hermakeup in the dressing table mirror. We are treated to a view of his face also goinground and round with the garments.)DOCTOR: The Satanic Nebula.(He looks at the little goldfish in the bowl on the counter.)DOCTOR: Or the lagoon of lost stars. Or we could go to Brighton. I've got a wholeday worked out.CLARA: Sorry, but as you can see, I've got plans.(Clara is in an open-necked white blouse with a thin black tie knotted halfway downher chest, black trousers with stilletto heels and is putting on a black jacket.)DOCTOR: Have you?CLARA: Look at me.DOCTOR: Yeah, okay.CLARA: No, no, no. No. Look at me.DOCTOR: Yep, looking.CLARA: Seriously?DOCTOR: Why is your face all coloured in?

[Classroom - memory]

DANNY: 7.15. Meeting me. You are. Date. Second one.CLARA: Got the words out. Not in the right order, but, hey. Maths teacher.(A young boy enters just as they are leaning in for a kiss.)BOTH: Out.

[Clara's flat]

DOCTOR: Are you taller?CLARA: Heels.DOCTOR: What, do you have to reach a high shelf?CLARA: Right, got to go. Going to be late.DOCTOR: For a shelf?CLARA: Bye.(A proper, old-fashioned telephone rings. It is the emergency one in the Tardis.)

CLARA: There you go, you've got another playmate.DOCTOR: Hardly anyone in the universe has that number.CLARA: Well, I've got it.DOCTOR: Yes, from some woman in a shop. We still don't know who that was.CLARA: Is that her now?DOCTOR: There are very few people that it could be.(He goes to answer it.)CLARA: Don't.DOCTOR: Why not?CLARA: Because, if you answer it, something will happen.

DOCTOR: What?CLARA: A thing.



DOCTOR: Huh. It's just a phone, Clara. Nothing happens when you answer thephone.(He picks up the receiver.)

[Room]

(And the next thing we see is instead of the telephone, he is holding a large wormwith a tiny pair of horns by its jaws up against his face. He screams and throws itonto the round table. Clara also screams and throws away a worm.)CLARA: Doctor?DOCTOR: Don't touch it.CLARA: Where are we? How did we get here?(A man with computer chips attached to the shaven right side of his head speaks.He is sitting to the left of Clara with his hand on a worm.)PSI: Who are you? Sorry, what's going on? I don't understand.(On his left is a dark-skinned woman. Her cheeks briefly bulge in imitation of theworm's horns.)SAIBRA: Argh! What is that thing?DOCTOR: It's a memory worm.CLARA: What happened to your face?DOCTOR: Deletes your memories.CLARA: Did you see her face?SAIBRA: How did I get here?DOCTOR: The same way we all did, but we've all forgotten.(There is a metal case in the middle of the table.)

SAIBRA: And who are you?(The answers are broadcast through a speaker.)DOCTOR [OC]: I am the Doctor, a Time Lord from Gallifrey. I have agreed to thismemory wipe of my own free will.CLARA [OC]: I am Clara Oswald, human. I have agreed to this memory wipe of myown free will. Do I really have to touch that worm thing?DOCTOR [OC]: Yes, you do. And change your shoes. You're next, Psi.PSI [OC]: I am Psi- augmented human. I have agreed to this memory wipe of myown free will.(Psi takes a chip from his head and looks at it. It is marked Memory Compromised.)

SAIBRA [OC]: I am Saibra, mutant human. I have agreed to this memory wipe ofmy own free will.(The case unlocks and opens with a golden light. It has two screens so thateveryone can watch. An electronically manipulated voice speaks while a golden Kin a circle is displayed, then a shadow in a hooded top, presumably the speaker.The voice has a slightly American style accent.) ARCHITECT [OC]: This is a recorded message. I am the Architect. Your lastmemory is of receiving a contact from an unknown agency. Me. Everything sincehas been erased from your minds. Now, pay close attention to this briefing.(The image now zoomed into a huge building alone one on a planet. It looks like an

advertisement for the subject described.) ARCHITECT [OC]: This is the Bank of Karabraxos, the most secure bank in thegalaxy. A fortress for the super-rich. If you can afford your own star system, this is



where you keep it. No one sets foot on the planet without protocols. All movementis monitored, all air consumption regulated. DNA is authenticated at every stage.Intruders will be incinerated.(We see a woman breath into a tube, but it stays red. Nozzles come out of the wallsand burn her and her companion alive. Next shot is of an oriental couple placing apainting into a drawer.) ARCHITECT [OC]: Each vault, buried deep in the earth, is accessed by a drop-slotat the planet's surface. It's atomically sealed, an unbreakable lock. The atoms haveall been scrambled. Your presence on this planet is unauthorised. A team will havebeen despatched to terminate you.(Someone hammers on the door and speaks through the grill.)GUARD [OC]: This is bank security. Open up. ARCHITECT [OC]: Your survival depends on following my instructions.GUARD [OC]: Open up and you shall be humanely disposed of.SAIBRA: There's another exit. ARCHITECT [OC]: All the information you need is in this case.(Psi takes a chip from his head and plugs it into the case.)DOCTOR: What are you doing?PSI: Downloading.DOCTOR: Ah. Augmented. Nice. ARCHITECT [OC]: The Bank of Karabraxos is impregnable.(The Doctor takes a mobile phone sized item from the case.)GUARD [OC]: Please stand away from the door. We do not wish to hurt you beforeincineration. ARCHITECT [OC]: The Bank of Karabraxos has never been breached. You will rob

the Bank of Karabraxos.(Glass shatters.)

[Office]

(A woman in a very tight suit sits at a white table in a small white room and answersher intercom-on-a-stick.)DELPHOX: Report.GUARD [OC]: Sorry, hello? Who is this?DELPHOX: This is Ms Delphox, Head of Bank Security. I sent you to investigate an

off-world intruder.GUARD [OC]: Did you? I was wondering what we're doing here.

[Room]

GUARD: We found these amazing worms(And he is holding one.)

[Teller's room]

(Ms Delphox leaves her desk and goes to the door. She breathes into a tube and itturns green, then opens the door to speak to guards in full armour standing by amisted up glass cage in the room next door.)



DELPHOX: Unwelcome guests. We're going to need the Teller.(She taps on the glass.)DELPHOX: Are you hungry, boy?(And blows the thing inside a kiss.)

[Corridor]

(The four are running, the Doctor is trailing behind and getting out of breath.)DOCTOR: Okay, okay, okay. Stop, stop, stop. Far enough. Augmented human.Computer augmented, yes? Mainframe in your head?PSI: I'm a gamer. Sorry, who put you in charge?DOCTOR: You're a liar. That's a prison code on your neck.PSI: I'm a hacker slash bank robber.DOCTOR: Good. This is a good day to be a bank robber. Mutant human. What kindof mutant?SAIBRA: Like he says, why are you in charge now?DOCTOR: It's my special power. What's yours?(Saibra sighs and takes Clara's hand. For a few moments there are two Claras,then she lets go and changes back to her original self.)SAIBRA: I touch living cells, I can replicate the owner.CLARA: Your face, when we first saw youSAIBRA: I touched the worm.CLARA: You can replicate their clothes too?SAIBRA: I wear a hologram shell.(The Doctor holds out the object he took from the case.)

DOCTOR: Human cells. DNA from a customer, maybe? A disguise to get us in?CLARA: We're actually going to do it? Rob the bank?DOCTOR: I don't think we have a choice. We've already agreed to.(Saibra touches the object.)

[Outside the Bank]

(Now a grey-haired man in a suit is walking with the Doctor, Clara and Psi. This isMister Porrima, although he is never actually named except on the cast list, so I'lluse that here.)

DOCTOR: How long can you maintain the image for?PORRIMA: For as long as I like.

[Banking hall]

(They enter. Saibra/Porrima leads the way through the massive open space.)DOCTOR: Question one. Robbing banks is easy if you've got a Tardis. So why am Inot using it?CLARA: Question two, where us the Tardis?DOCTOR: Okay, that probably should be question one.

(An alarm sounds and security grills block all the exits. The Bank computer has afriendly, slightly cheerful male voice.)COMPUTER: Banking floor locking down.



PORRIMA: They know we're here.COMPUTER: Banking floor locking down.(Ms Delphox enters with two suited heavies and goes to a male customer. Thensomething with two-toed feet enters, wearing an orange prisoner jump-suit and itsarms in a straight jacket. This being has its eyes on the end of flexible stalks,vaguely reminiscent of Gerry Anderson's Creons. It walks slowly with its armouredescort behind, holding onto the ends of its chains. The Teller, I presume.)PORRIMA: (sotto) What is that?DOCTOR: I don't know. Hate not knowing.DELPHOX: Excuse me, sir. I regret to say that your guilt has been detected.CUSTOMER: What? That, that's totally ridiculous.DELPHOX: Is it, sir? Well then, we will certainly double-check. The Teller will nowscan your thoughts for any criminal intent. Good luck, sir.(Delphox moves away. The customer puts down his briefcase.)DOCTOR: Interesting.PSI: What is?DOCTOR: The latest thing in sniffer dogs. Telepathic. It hunts guilt.(A high pitched sound makes the unfortunate customer hold his head in pain.)CLARA: What about our guilt?DOCTOR: Currently being drowned out.CLARA: What's he doing?DOCTOR: If he has a plan, he's trying not to think of it.PSI: Ever tried not thinking about something?CLARA: No.PORRIMA: You may have to.

(The creature roars.)DELPHOX: Ah, criminal intent detected. How naughty. What was your plan?Counterfeit currency in your briefcase, perhaps?CUSTOMER: No, not at all. For God's sake.DELPHOX: It doesn't really matter, we'll establish the details later. The Teller isnever wrong when it comes to guilt. Your account will now be deleted, andobviously your mind. Suppertime.(The armoured guards hold on to the creature's chains as it steps closer to thecustomer. It puts its eye stalks together and a pulsating ray is aimed at thecustomer's head. He clutches his head and Psi feels something, too.)

DOCTOR: It's wiping his mind. Turning his brain into soup.DELPHOX: Your next of kin will be informed, and incarcerated, as furtherinducement to honest financial transactions.(The customer screams.)CLARA: We've got to help him.DOCTOR: He's gone already. It's over.CLARA: He's in agony, look at him.DOCTOR: Those aren't tears, Clara. That's soup.(The creature separates its eye stalks. The man stops screaming and suited heavycatches him. The front of his brain pan is caved in.)

DELPHOX: Account closed. Take him away. He's ready for his close-up.(She uses a microphone to broadcast.)DELPHOX: Apologies for the disturbance. Everyone have a lovely day.



[Deposit booth]

(Our four enter a small room with red walls broken up by faux marble columns.There is a computer interface on the wall opposite the ornate metal doors.)COMPUTER: Deposit booth locking. Please exhale. Your valuables will betransported up from the vault.(Mister Porrima breaths into the tube. It turns green and Saibra changes back toherself. A case arrives.)PSI: If he can break in here and plant this thing, then why does he need our help?DOCTOR: Depends what the thing is.(He opens the case.)DOCTOR: Okay, well, I'm no expert, but fuses, timer. I'm going to stick my neck outand say bomb. (to Psi) Bank schematic. Now.(Psi goes to one of the marble columns and plugs in. A screen appears.)

[Office]

(Ms Delphox is reading the guard's report.)DELPHOX: So, the man we captured on the banking floor wasn't the target.GUARD: Four visitors just entered a safety-deposit box.DELPHOX: The greatest bank in the galaxy. Our reputation must remain secure.The Director will blame us. We'll be fired. Fired with pain.

[Deposit booth]

(Psi has got the schematics on view.)DOCTOR: The floor below is all service corridors, the veins and arteries of thebank.(Psi disconnects himself. The Doctor does a brief tap dance in the middle of thefloor.)DOCTOR: He wants us to blow through the floor.SAIBRA: Well, we'll die if we do that.DOCTOR: Well, not necessarily. There must be a plan.CLARA: What if the plan is, we're blowing up the floor for someone else? What if

we're not supposed to make it out alive?DOCTOR: Oh, don't be so pessimistic. It'll affect team morale.SAIBRA: What, and getting us blown up won't?DOCTOR: Well, only very, very briefly.PSI: Er, no. No way. You can do you what you like. I'm going to take my chancesout there.CLARA: Psi.PSI: No, no, no. This guy, your mate, is a lunatic.DOCTOR: What do you want, Psi, more than anything else? Whatever it is, it's inthis bank. You agreed to rob the most impregnable bank in history. You must have

had a very good reason. We all must have. Picture the thing you want most in theuniverse, and decide how badly you want it. Well?PSI: Still don't understand why you're in charge.



DOCTOR: Basically, it's the eyebrows.(The Doctor has primed the device from the case. He puts it in the middle of thefloor and it starts to build up power. Everyone grabs a piece of wall and waits. Thepower peaks, there's a brief flash, then the sound of distand machinery. They turnaround and look down a hole in the floor. The Doctor picks up the bomb.)DOCTOR: Nice. Dimensional shift bomb. Sends the particles to a different plane.Come on then, Team Not Dead.

[Outside the Deposit booth]

GUARD: Open up.(The team are underneath the booth. The Doctor returns the floor particles to thisplane just before the guards stride in and look around, baffled.)

[Basement]

SAIBRA: Well, so, what are we supposed to do now? What's the plan?DOCTOR: I don't know. The Architect set all this up. It should make sense. Mypersonal plan is that a thing will probably happen quite soon.SAIBRA: Ah, so that's it. That's your plan?DOCTOR: Yep.SAIBRA: A thing will happen?DOCTOR: A thing. Probably.CLARA: Hey, Psi.(Clara has spotted another case.)

CLARA: Doctor.DOCTOR: There you go. Thing time.CLARA: How does he get the cases here?DOCTOR: By breaking into the bank in advance of breaking into the bank.CLARA: Well, how did he do that? And if he can do that, why does he need us?DOCTOR: Not our problem.PSI: Well, what is our prob-prob-prob-prob-pr?(Psi sounds like a stuck CD.)CLARA: You okay?PSI: Drive glitch. It's fine.

DOCTOR: Guilt is our problem. Guilt, in this bank, is fatal. The Teller can hear it.Ever since that first case was opened, we've been targets. The more we knowabout why we're here, the louder our guilt screams. That's why we wiped ourmemories. For our own safety. Now, once I open this, I can't close it again.PSI: Would it be safer if only one of us learned it?DOCTOR: I'm waiting for you to volunteer.PSI: Er, why me?DOCTOR: Because you didn't need that memory worm, did you? You're half-computer. You can perform a manual delete. You can clear your thoughts.PSI: Okay.

(Psi carefully opens the case.)PSI: I don't know what it is. You may as well have a look. Well, what are they?(Six short tubes with metal ends, and pins that can be pulled out on top.)



DOCTOR: Not a clue.SAIBRA: Hmm, interesting.DOCTOR: What is?SAIBRA: You're lying.PSI: Er, why would he be lyi-lyi-lyi-lying? Ugh. Sorry. Stress. Drains the batteries.DOCTOR: Interface with this.(A wall console.)SAIBRA: Do we have time for this?DOCTOR: Well, why not? There's no immediate threat.(An alarm sounds.)COMPUTER: Warning. Intruders detected.DOCTOR: I should stop saying things like that.COMPUTER: Intruders detected.DOCTOR: Clara, you stay with Psi. Saibra, let's go and investigate.COMPUTER: Intru(Psi jacks himself in to recharge, and blows dirt from a set of contacts on one of hisremovable chips.)PSI: Oh. Storm dust.CLARA: You can delete your memories?PSI: Yeah, it's not as fun as it sounds.CLARA: I've got a few I wish I could lose.PSI: And I lost a few I wish I hadn't. No, I was, I was interrogated in prison. And Iguess I panicked. I didn't want to be a risk to the people close to me, soCLARA: You deleted your friends?PSI: My friends, anyone who ever helped me, my family.

CLARA: Your family?PSI: Of course my family.CLARA: How could you do that?PSI: Well, I don't know. (sighs) I suppose I must have loved them.

[Corridor]

(The Doctor kicks out a grill underneath a sign that says No Entry Under AnyCircumstances, then helps Saibra out.)DOCTOR: Aren't you going to ask me?

SAIBRA: Why did you lie? Those hardware things, you know what they are.DOCTOR: Exit strategy of sorts. How did you know I was lying?SAIBRA: I've had a lot of faces, I find them easy to read.DOCTOR: Quite a gift.SAIBRA: Gift?DOCTOR: It got us in here.SAIBRA: Mutant gene. No one can touch me. If they do, I transform. Touch me,Doctor, and you'll be looking at yourself. I am alone.DOCTOR: Why?SAIBRA: Could you trust someone who looked back at you out of your own eyes?

(They hear a moan, and follow the sound to a row of cells. Psi and Clara run andcatch them up.)CLARA: Oh, my God. Why is he even still alive?



(It is the customer with the caved in skull, being held up by chains manacled aroundhis wrists. His is not the only occupied cell.)DOCTOR: I don't know. But someone is watching.(A red light is blinking nearby.)PSI: Doctor. However this goes, whatever happens, don't let me end up like that.(An alarm sounds.)COMPUTER: Intruders on the service level. Intruders on the service level.(They run to another No Entry etc grill and the Doctor sonicks it.)DOCTOR: Now this says place to hide.

[Teller's room]

SAIBRA: Where are we?(The Doctor peers at the Teller in his humid glass case, and it reacts. Can't reallytell if the water droplets are inside or outside, sorry.)DOCTOR: Nobody move. Nobody say a word. It's cocooned. Forced hibernation.Its power is probably dormant.(There are running boots and voices outside. The Teller moves.)DOCTOR: Clara. It's locked on to you. It may still be asleep. Don't wake it.CLARA: Okay. How do I not do that?DOCTOR: Keep your mind blank. Block everything. Once it locks onto yourthoughts, it won't let go.(The Teller growls gently. Clara closes her eyes.)DOCTOR: It's waking up. Keep blocking your thoughts, Clara. Don't think.(The creature roars.)

PSI: This way.(Saibra sees legs running past another grill as the three return to the one theycame through. Somehow she gets trapped, but I can't see how unless the creaturesomehow mentally grabbed her.)SAIBRA: Oh.PSI: Saibra!CLARA: She's still in there. How do we get her out?DOCTOR: It's scanning her brain.PSI: Then what?DOCTOR: Soup.

CLARA: Then help her.(Saibra is in pain.)DOCTOR: Saibra.SAIBRA: What should I do? How can I get away?DOCTOR: It's rooting through your brain. It's tasting all the secrets stashed inside. Any moment now, it will finish its sweep and start feasting on what's left.SAIBRA: And then I become one of those things we saw sitting in a cage?DOCTOR: Yes.SAIBRA: Can you not get me out?DOCTOR: I'm sorry. I don't know how, once it's locked onto your thoughts.

SAIBRA: Exit strategy. That means what I think it means, right?(The Doctor holds out one of the tubes to her through the grill.)DOCTOR: Atomic shredder.



SAIBRA: Painless?DOCTOR: And instant.SAIBRA: When you meet the Architect, promise me something. Kill him.DOCTOR: I hate him, but I can't make that promise.SAIBRA: A good man. I left it late to meet one of those.(She uses the shredder, and vanishes in bright blue light. The Teller roars infrustration.)

[Outside the vault]

(They exit through another grill. A big round vault door is at the end of this corridor.)DOCTOR: Right, vault. That's clear. What's not clear is what we do now.CLARA: Hey. You okay?DOCTOR: No, I'm an amnesiac robbing a bank. Why would I be okay?CLARA: Because SaibraDOCTOR: What? Saibra is dead, we are alive. Prioritise if you want to stay thatway.PSI: Oh, is that why you call yourself the Doctor? The professional detachment.DOCTOR: Listen. When we're done here, by all means, you go and find yourself ashoulder to cry on. You'll probably need that. Till then, what you need is me.(The Doctor walks away towards the vault.)CLARA: Underneath it all, he isn't really like that.PSI: It's very obvious that you've been with him for a while.CLARA: Why?PSI: Because you are really good at the excuses.

(The Doctor finds a case in a computer access alcove by the vault door.)DOCTOR: Another gift from the Architect. Shall we unwrap it?

[Teller's room]

(The escape route has been found.)DELPHOX: The unbreakable bank. We must locate them. And Director Karabraxosmust not know. When people get fired here, it's messy. Release the Teller into thetunnels.

[Outside the vault]

(Psi jacks himself into the small device in the case and downloads its contents. Ithurts. He then goes into the computer access alcove while Clara looks at a printedcard that was also in the case. TECH 251 ORG 339 PV)PSI: Right, the system looks like it's time-delayed. There are twenty four lock codesI need to break.(Growling.)CLARA: Doctor? It's coming. We're trapped.DOCTOR: Psi, how long?

PSI: As long as it takes.DOCTOR: It's locked on to one of our thought trails. We have to split up, minimisethe brain signals.



PSI: What happened to your professional detachment, Doctor?(Psi holds out his hand, and the Doctor gives him one of the shredders.)CLARA: No, no.PSI: In case it finds me. It's my choice.CLARA: You don't use that, okay? Promise me.PSI: Time to run.(Psi sits down to work.)

[Corridor]

DOCTOR: Separate.(Clara and the Doctor go opposite ways through the maze of identical corridors.The Teller moves slowly.)

[Outside the vault]

COMPUTER: Vault locks opening. Vault locks opening. 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18,17(As the computer counts down, the red lights around the outside of the circular doorturn green. Psi unplugs himself and runs.)

[Corridor]

(Clara tries to hide as the Teller stomps nearer.)DOCTOR [memory]: Keep your mind clear, Clara. Keep your mind blank.

(She can hear the Teller's heavy breathing nearby, so she tries to make a break forit. But as she runs past the creature, it grabs her with its mind.)CLARA: Argh.(The Doctor hears her cry.)DOCTOR: Clara!(Psi jacks into a wall.)PSI [OC]: Come on! Come and find me!(Psi is uploading or downloading images of criminals from history from the Bank'sdatabase, including a Sensorite from the First Doctor stories, Androvax from SarahJane Adventures, the Gunslinger, Captain John Hart, Skaldak the Time Warrior, a

Slitheen, a Weevil and SJA's Trickster, along with mug shots of humans I don'trecognise but someone might. Was one John Dillinger or similar? The Tellerreleases Clara.)PSI: Every thief and villain in one big cocktail. I am so guilty! Every famous burglarin history is hiding in this bank right now in one body. Come and feast! Clara? Forwhat it's worth, and it might not be worth much, when your whole life flashes in frontof you, you see people you love and people missing you. Well, I see no one.(Psi stands in front of the Teller and pulls the ring from the top of the shredder withhis teeth, like a grenade. The Teller aims its beam at him, and he jabs himself withthe shredder, then screams as he disappears. The Teller roars, and Clara runs.)

[Outside the vault]



COMPUTER: Three, two, one. Failed.(Clara and the Doctor run back to see one red light left.)COMPUTER: Vault unlocking failed.(Clara tugs on the bars on the front of the door.)CLARA: It's not opening. Psi. He died for nothing.(The Doctor goes to the computer alcove and uses his screwdriver.)DOCTOR: Multiple locks. Last one still in place.(He opens up a nearby panel.)DOCTOR: Atomic seal. Unbreakable, even for me. The Architect would know that.He wouldn't bring us all this way for nothing.CLARA: And get two people killed.DOCTOR: Exactly. There must be some logic.CLARA: Some logic?DOCTOR: Come on, Architect. What else have you got?(Thunder outside.)

[Office]

DELPHOX: Report, please. What was the disturbance?

[Banking hall]

GUARD: Solar storm. Getting worse. Interfering with our systems.(This planet is so close to its sun that there is no time delay between the flareleaving the star and hitting the atmosphere.)

[Outside the vault]

DOCTOR: A storm. The storm's tripping the system. That's what he's got, a storm.CLARA: How would he know when a storm would hit?DOCTOR: (laughs) Of course. Stupid, stupid Doctor. Of course, of course.CLARA: Of course, what?DOCTOR: Whoever planned all this, they're in the future. This isn't just a bankheist, it's a time travel heist. We've been sent back in time to the exact moment ofthe storm, to be in exactly the right place when it hits, because that's the only time

the bank is vulnerable.COMPUTER: Vault unlocked.(The big door swings open.)DOCTOR: The bank is now open.COMPUTER: Vault unlocked.DOCTOR: Come on.

[Vault]

(They step inside the golden vault lined with safety deposit boxes.)

DOCTOR: It explains why we're not here in the Tardis.CLARA: Sorry, what?



DOCTOR: The solar disruption would have made navigation impossible. The onetime the bank is vulnerable is the one time we can't just land.CLARA: Doctor? The code. The code that was in the last case. Look. Tech.DOCTOR: Technology. 251. Find it.(They hunt amongst the myriad of racks. Clara finds the right section.)CLARA: Tech.(They don't need a key to open the box. The Doctor opens the small case inside. Itlooks like a fat hypodermic syringe.)DOCTOR: It's a neophyte circuit. (It lights up blue.) I've only ever seen one oncebefore. It can reboot any system, replace any lost data.CLARA: Psi. That's what he came for, his reward.DOCTOR: So what did Saibra come for?(ORG 339 contains a bottle.)DOCTOR: Gene suppressant.CLARA: She wanted to be normal.DOCTOR: Everyone has a weakness. So the big question is this. What did wecome for?CLARA: PV.DOCTOR: Private vault. Karabraxos's own fortune?(The Doctor walks around the rack of boxes and straight into the Teller.)

[Office]

(Two armoured guards stand behind the Doctor and Clara. One has kept his helmeton. The Teller is also there.)

DELPHOX: Intruders are most welcome. They remind us that the bank isimpregnable. It's good for morale to have a few of you scattered about the place,preferably on view.(CCTV images of the brain-dead in the cells are on a section of the wall.)DELPHOX: Are you ready for your close-up? If you're thinking of ways to escape,the Teller will know before you've even made a move. You'll never be bothered byall that thinking again.DOCTOR: Useful species.DELPHOX: Last of its kind, and we've signed an exclusive deal.DOCTOR: Must be noisy inside its head. Painful to listen to so much chatter, so

many secrets. Must drive it wild. How can you force it to obey?DELPHOX: Oh, everything has a price tag, I think you'll find.(The storm rages overhead.)DELPHOX: The storm's getting worse. The customers are leaving. DirectorKarabraxos will be concerned. Our jobs will be on the line.DOCTOR: You're scared.DELPHOX: Oh, I'm terrified. I have the disadvantage of knowing Karabraxospersonally.DOCTOR: If you don't like your boss, why stay?DELPHOX: My face fits. Now if you'll excuse me, I must take the Teller to its

hibernation. You two, dispose of our guests.(Delphox and the Teller leave, and the door closes behind them. The guards pushClara and the Doctor up against the wall.)



DOCTOR: Don't do this. I'm having a very bad day, and I do not want to be pushedaround.BEARDED GUARD: You're wrong.DOCTOR: Wrong?BEARDED GUARD: It's not that bad a day. And you're being very slow.DOCTOR: Why are you undoing my handcuffs?(The bearded guard transforms into - )DOCTOR: Saibra?(The guard with the helmet on speaks.)PSI: It looked like death. (he takes it off.) It was actually a teleporter.(Clara hugs him.)CLARA: Oh, my God.PSI: Good, eh? You think we're dead, so the Teller thinks we're dead, and we playthe creature at his own mind games.DOCTOR: No, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What? Sorry, sorry, what? You, you, you're,you're alive?SAIBRA: Yeah, we're alive. Look at us. We're all alive.DOCTOR: No, no, no, no. Not dead. Alive.PSI: There's an escape ship in orbit. Takes you right there. Oh, and there's this bigblue box. Is that yours?DOCTOR: Well, this is good, I suppose. You'll be able to resume the mission. Genesuppressant. Antidote for your condition.(Saibra takes the bottle from the Doctor.)DOCTOR: Memory giver. All your yesterdays.(Psi takes it.)

DOCTOR: There you go. Job done, paid in full. Clever old Architect.SAIBRA: Very clever.DOCTOR: I still hate him.SAIBRA: Me too.PSI: How were you paid?DOCTOR: I don't know. There's something in the private vault.

[Basement]

DOCTOR: What's that?

PSI: Supply line. It's the only oxygen down to the private vault. There's another onefor water, for basic life support.CLARA: What, for a private vault?DOCTOR: Someone likes to hang out with their wealth.

[Private vault]

(We look around the vault whilst listening to the Overture To The Abduction FromThe Seraglio by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, K384. Lots of small statuary aroundthe place including a Buddha, Tutankamun's golden coffin. The team enter through

a grill, of course.)DOCTOR: Director Karabraxos? Excuse us, but we've come to rob you. So if youwant to put your hands above your head, or



(The richly embroidered high backed chair spins round to reveal a woman identicalto Ms Delphox with her hands up. The music ends.)KARABRAXOS: Or? You didn't bring any weapons. That's a bit of an oversight.Security, Karabraxos here.DOCTOR: You're Karabraxos?KARABRAXOS: One moment.DELPHOX [on monitor]: Director Karabraxos, is there a problem?KARABRAXOS: Intruders in the private vault. Send me the Teller. I want to find outhow they got in, and then I want to wipe their memories.DOCTOR: She's a clone.KARABRAXOS: It's the only way to control my own security. I have a clone in everyfacility. Get on it right away.DELPHOX [on monitor]: Yes, of course.KARABRAXOS: And then hand in your credentials. You're fired, with immediateeffect.DELPHOX [on monitor]: But please, I've been in your serviceKARABRAXOS: Ever since the last one let me down and I was forced to kill it. Ican't quite believe that you're putting me through this again.(Transmission ends.)KARABRAXOS: My clone. And yet she doesn't even protest. Pale imitation, really.Ha! I should sue.CLARA: You're killing her? You just saidKARABRAXOS: Fired? I put all of the used clones into the incinerator. Can't have tomany of moi scattered around.PSI: Sorry, you don't get on with your own clone?

DOCTOR: She hates her own clones. She burns her own clones. Frankly, you're acareer break for the right therapist. Shut up. Everybody, just, just shut up.KARABRAXOS: And what is this display now, as amusing as you are?DOCTOR: Shut up. Just shut up, shut up, shut up, shutetty up up up. What, whatdid you say? What did you say? What did you say about your own eyes? De-shutup. Say it again. SAIBRA: How can you trust someone if they look back at you outof your own eyes?DOCTOR: I know one thing about the Architect. What is it that I know about the Architect? I know one thing. Something that I've known from the very start.CLARA: What?

DOCTOR: I hate him. He's overbearing, he's manipulative, he likes to think thathe's very clever. I hate him! Clara, don't you see?(He strikes a handy gong.)DOCTOR: I hate the Architect.KARABRAXOS: What in the name of sanity is going in this room now?DOCTOR: We're getting sanity judgment from the self-burner. Do you mind if Iborrow a little bit of paper?KARABRAXOS: And what are you doing now?DOCTOR: I'm giving you my telephone number.KARABRAXOS: Why?

(He folds the paper over and writes on the outside, too.)DOCTOR: Well, I thought you might like to call me someday.(It says, I Am A Time Traveller.)



DOCTOR: Sorry, I thought we were getting along famously. Am I, like, misreadingthe signals or something?(The solar storm rattles the building.)DOCTOR: Oh, that was a big one, wasn't it? I think that your bank is about to closefor good, Karabraxos. If I was you, I'd get going. Don't mind us, we'll just stay hereand burn.(The alarm sounds as the solar flare sweeps across the planet and the Bank. Thecustomers panic. Karabraxos is packing a bag. A Faberg egg?)DOCTOR: Hard to know what to take. The greatest treasures of the universe in justone suitcase.(The building shakes again.)CLARA: Doctor, what's the plan? Is there a plan?SAIBRA: We can use the shredders and get us back to the ship.DOCTOR: They're not shredders, they're teleports, and that's not the mostinteresting thing about them.SAIBRA: So what is?DOCTOR: There were six of them. Hey. Give me a call me some time.COMPUTER: Doors opening.KARABRAXOS: You'll be dead.DOCTOR: Yeah, you'll be old. We'll get on famously. You'll be old and full of regretfor the things that you can't change.(Karabraxos gets into her personal lift.)COMPUTER: Doors closing.(The Doctor makes a phone me gesture.)PSI: Doctor, what the hell is going on?

CLARA: Are you remembering?DOCTOR: No, not a thing. But I'm understanding.CLARA: What? What is it? What are you understanding?DOCTOR: I'm not sure yet. I need my memory back. And I think there's only oneway to do that.CLARA: Which would be?DOCTOR: Soup.CLARA: Soup?(Ding! The lift doors open and the Teller enters.)DOCTOR: Hello, big man. Peckish?

(The Teller grabs the Doctor's mind with its own.)CLARA: Doctor!(The pain drives the Doctor to his knees.)DOCTOR: No, no. Let it take me. Let it read me. It's the only way.CLARA: It will kill you.DOCTOR: What have I told you about pessimism? That's it, that's it. There are somany memories in here. Feast on them. Tuck in. Big scarf, bow tie, bitembarrassing. What do you think of the new look? I was hoping for minimalism, butI think I came up with magician. In the last few days, there's been a block. Can yousee the block? Tell me why I'm here. Show me why I'm here. Show me!

[Clara's flat]



DOCTOR: It's just a phone, Clara. Nothing happens when you answer the phone.

[Bedroom / Clara's flat]

(An old woman lying in a bed is on the other end of the line, hooked up to variousmonitoring devices.)KARABRAXOS: Doctor?DOCTOR: Hello?KARABRAXOS: You gave me this number. My name is Madame Karabraxos. I wasonce the wealthiest person in the Universe. I need your assistance. I'm dying, withmany, many regrets. But one, perhaps, you may be able to help me with.

[Clara's flat]

(The Doctor replaces the receiver.)DOCTOR: It's a little detour. It's a, it's a job, I've got to do it for someone. Come on.

[Tardis]

DOCTOR: We need to rob a bank.CLARA: What?DOCTOR: Clara, I need worms.(He sets the time rotor going and scrolls through various faces, including Psi,Saibra, and Mister Porrima, with whom he shakes hands then transfers the skincells to the device in the first case.)

DOCTOR: The Bank of Karabraxos has never been breached.(Saibra and Psi delete their memories, then Clara strokes the worm.)DOCTOR: Architect.(He works to disguise his voice.)TARDIS AUDIO: Architect.DOCTOR: Architect.TARDIS AUDIO: Architect.DOCTOR: Architect.TARDIS AUDIO: Architect.DOCTOR: Architect.

(Then he places the cases where they will be found later / earlier in the show.)DOCTOR: You will rob the Bank of Karabraxos.(And reveals himself to be the shadow in the hooded top.)

[Private vault]

(The Teller releases the Doctor.)DOCTOR: Did you see why we came? Why we're here? We had to delete our ownmemories, otherwise you'd have known, and then she'd have known, because youwere mentally linked. But she's gone now. They've all gone. They have no power

over you now. You can do exactly what you want to do now. Exactly what you'vealways wanted to do.(A small lock turns on the wall.)



PSI: It knows the combination.DOCTOR: Of course it does. It was linked to Karabraxos.CLARA: What exactly are we doing here? That thing killed people.DOCTOR: Well so might you do, to protect everything you loved.(The safe door swings open to reveal a second creature in a straight jacket. Itwails.)DOCTOR: There she is. Not the last of its species. The last two.(Psi works to unchain her.)DOCTOR: It's okay, it's okay. It's all right.SAIBRA: Exit strategy. We've got six shredders.DOCTOR: Exactly. This wasn't a bank heist. It never was. It was rescue mission fora whole species. Flesh and blood, the last currency.(The lights flicker.)DOCTOR: Time to go home. What do you think of that, big man?(A big roar.)

[Planet surface]

DOCTOR: So much mental traffic in the universe. Solitude is the only peace.(Freed of their clothing and restraints, the two telepathic beings walk off together.)

[Tardis]

(In flight, eating take-out with chopsticks. I think the Doctor says Cesare Borgia,which actually makes more sense, but the subtitles disagree with me so I'm

outnumbered.)DOCTOR: Gioffre Borgia, mucho scary hombre, says to me, what do you think ofour Leaning Tower of Pisa? I say, (leans sideways) it looks okay to me.(Laugter. Later, saying goodbye.)PSI: If you ever need help with another bank heist(The Doctor shakes Psi's hand, Clara hugs him.)CLARA: Yeah, it's not really his area.(The Doctor makes the Phone Me sign. Psi leaves. Later, Saibra hugs the Doctor.)SAIBRA: See? I don't have your face now.DOCTOR: Yeah. I kind of miss that.

SAIBRA: Oh, shut up.(Saibra leave the Tardis. The Doctor rubs his arm where Saibra had squeezed him. And finally -)DOCTOR: 7.12, local time, as promised. Go and enjoy yourself. Don't do anything Iwouldn't do.CLARA: It's a date. You know, I've just realised. I'm going out for another meal now.DOCTOR: Don't worry. Calories consumed on the Tardis have no lasting effect.CLARA: What? Are you kidding?.DOCTOR: Of course I'm kidding. It's a time machine, not a miracle worker. Bye,bye.

CLARA: See you. Don't rob any banks.DOCTOR: Don't rob any banks what?CLARA: Without me.



DOCTOR: Course not, boss.(Clara leaves.)DOCTOR: Robbing a bank. Robbing a whole bank. Beat that for a date.[Alienplanet]

(With wickedly sharp rocky outcrops sticking sideways out of the desert ground.The Doctor and Clara are chained to ornately carved pillars as twin suns beatdown.)CLARA: There's no way out of this. We're going to die here.DOCTOR: Pass me the vibro-cutters.CLARA: They're in my pocket.DOCTOR: Come on then, pass them to me.CLARA: In my other jacket. At home.DOCTOR: Why have you got two jackets? Is one of them faulty?CLARA: Look, I don't have the vibro-cutters. If I had the vibro-cutters, I wouldn't beable to pass you the vibro-cutters. We're going to starve to death out here.DOCTOR: Of course we won't starve. The sand piranhas will get us long beforethat.

[Pub]

(Clara enters and goes to Danny's table.)CLARA: Hiya. Sorry I'm late.(They kiss.)DANNY: You're not. You're brown. You're very brown. You weren't that brown this

morning.CLARA: Sunbed. I'll get 'em in. Usual?

[Clara's flat]

(Clara is about to go out when the Doctor pops his head out of the Tardis.)DOCTOR: Fish people.CLARA: What are they like?DOCTOR: Fish. And people. Come and see.

[Taxi]

CLARA: How's you?DANNY: Evening. Nice frock. It's a bit wet.CLARA: Freak shower.DANNY: Is that seaweed?CLARA: I said freak.

[Corridor]

(Running as lasers are shot at them.)CLARA: How much further?



DOCTOR: Tardis has got to be round this corner. I hate soldiers. Don't you hatesoldiers?CLARA: Yeah.DOCTOR: Just keep running!

[Clara's flat]

(She opens the front door to see -)CLARA: Oh, yeah. Danny. Hiya.DANNY: Morning. Ready to run?CLARA: Mmm hmm.

[Clara's bedroom]

(Clara is out of breath and completely drenched in sweat.)CLARA: I can't keep doing this. I can't do it. Yes, I can, I can do it, of course I cando it. I've got it all under control.

[Tardis]

(Clara enters from her living room.)CLARA: So, where we off to?DOCTOR: Clara, you, you look lovely today. Have you had a wash?CLARA: Why are you being nice?DOCTOR: Because it works on you. Listen, I'm sorry but there's going to be no trip

today. I'm sorry. Er, I've got to do a thing. It might take a while.CLARA: What thing?(He keeps the scanner with the flashing red light out of her view.)DOCTOR: Just a thing.CLARA: You're being mysterious, and do you know what means?DOCTOR: I'm a man of mystery.CLARA: Hmm. It means that you are a very clever man making the mistake,common to very clever people, of assuming that everybody else is stupid. Whereare you going?(She grabs the scanner and he switches it to the view of the galaxy.)

DOCTOR: Undercover. Deep cover.CLARA: Can you do deep cover?DOCTOR: What do you mean?CLARA: Have you seen you?DOCTOR: Of course I can do deep cover.CLARA: (giggling) Where, the Magic Circle?(The Doctor snaps his fingers, and the Tardis doors open.)DOCTOR: I'll see you when I see you.(Clara snaps her fingers, and they close again.)CLARA: When's that?

(Snap, open.)DOCTOR: When I see you.CLARA: Hmm. Hmm. I'll be sure to have a wash.



DOCTOR: Excellent. I was meaning to bring it up.(Clara leaves, shutting the doors then opening them again and pointingmeaningfully at her eye before finally leaving. The Doctor calls up the glowing areaon the map which is on the scanner - East London.)

[Playground]

(The boys are playing football where they shouldn't as the teachers arrive.)TEACHER: You lot! Not here. Over there.COURTNEY: Morning, Mister Pink.DANNY: Morning, Courtney. And good morning, Miss Oswald.CLARA: Morning, Mister Pink.(The group of girls by the entrance giggle.)

[School corridor]

CLARA: Do they know?DANNY: Possibly. They're children. It's like they've got minds of their own. Are youokay?CLARA: Yeah, course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay?DANNY: I dunno. Every time I see you, it's like you'reCLARA: What?DANNY: In a rush. In a state. In a space helmet, one time.CLARA: Sorry. Er, I've had a thing and, er, the thing's gone, so I'm all yours.DANNY: What thing? What's gone?

CLARA: Nothing.DANNY: It's like you're trying to be mysterious. I'm not stupid, you know.CLARA: The next few days are all about you. I promise.(Clara moves in closer, but pupils giggle at the end of the corridor, so she walksaway.)

[Staff room]

ARMITAGE: Which means, Jo, you'll have to cover for 8/4M in L3. Hold on, there is just one more thing. Atif's off sick, so we've got a newbie, I did ask him to come

along.(Knocking on the door.) ARMITAGE: Ah, here he is.(A tall figure in a brown coverall and holding a broom enters.)DOCTOR: I'm the new caretaker. John Smith.DANNY: Welcome to Coal Hill, Mister Smith.DOCTOR: Thanks. Yes, John Smith's the name. But, you know, here's a thing. Mostpeople just call me the Doctor.(He winks at Clara.)DOCTOR: So, if anybody needs me, just, you know, give me a shout. I'll be in the

storeroom just getting the lie of the land.(The staff leave the room.)



DOCTOR: Yes, no body's taking any notice at all. Absolutely good news because itmeans I must be coming across just as an absolutely boring human being like you.(Clara mouths What are you doing here? He shuts the door on her.)DOCTOR: Deep cover. Deep cover.

[School corridor]

DANNY: Do you know him?CLARA: Know who?DANNY: The caretaker, Smith. The Doctor.CLARA: Never seen him before in my life.DANNY: Bit intense looking. Did you see those eyebrows? Did he wink at you?CLARA: No, I think that was just a sort of general wink, you know? He winked ateverybody. It was a general welcoming wink. Ah, I have, er, left some marking. Assembly. Chop-chop. Off you pop. Catch you in a bit. Excuse me.

[Staff room]

(The Doctor is looking at a plan of the school buildings. He crumples it into hispocket when Clara enters.)DOCTOR: So, you recognised me, then.CLARA: You're wearing a different coat.DOCTOR: But you saw straight through that.CLARA: Deep cover in my school? Why? Where's Atif, what have you done withhim?

(The Doctor wards her off with his broom.)DOCTOR: He's fine. Hypnotised. He thinks he's got the 'flu. Also a flying car andthree wives. It's going to be a rude awakening.CLARA: Is it aliens? Oh, my God, is that why you're here? Are there aliens?DOCTOR: It's assembly. You'd better get going. Go and worship something.CLARA: Are there aliens in this school?DOCTOR: Listen, it's lovely talking to you, but I've really got to get on. I'm acaretaker now. Look, I've got a brush.CLARA: Doctor, is there an alien in this school?DOCTOR: Yes, me. Now, go. The walls need sponging and there's a sinister

puddle.CLARA: You can't do this. You cannot pass yourself off as a real person amongactual people.DOCTOR: I lived among otters once for a month. Well, I sulked. River and I, we hadthis big fightCLARA: Human beings are not otters!DOCTOR: Exactly. It'll be even easier.CLARA: Okay. One question. And you will answer this question. Are the kids safe?DOCTOR: No. Nobody is safe. But soon the answer will be yes, everybody is safe,if you let me get on. Now, pretend you don't know me. Stay out of my way. The less

you know, the better. I'll explain it all later. Go and sing with the otters.CLARA: I hate you.DOCTOR: That's fine. That's a perfectly normal reaction.



[Street]

(Two schoolboys are playing a video game by a large wrought iron gate.)NOAH: Basically, you've to get that guy on the block and stop that other oneshooting him. It's so sick.YASHE: I, I got that guy. That was, like, six months ago. You actually have to do isflick it that way.NOAH: Nah, but I'm saying(A Community Support Officer approaches them.)MATTHEW: You Coal Hill kids?NOAH: Yeah? So what if we are?MATTHEW: Then get to Coal Hill.YASHE: We've got a free period, mate.MATTHEW: You want me to take your names?YASHE: Come on. This is unfair, mate.(Something rattles on the other side of the gate.)MATTHEW: Always come in threes. Oi! I know you're in there.

[Old building]

(He goes through the creaky gate and pries a piece of corrugated iron off the maindoor to the old building.)MATTHEW: Hello? I'm a police officer. There's no point hiding. Do you hear me?Come on, kiddo.

BLITZER: Five stop intruder. Five stop intruder.MATTHEW: Turn your game off. It's time for school. Come on. Stop messing about!(Something with bright blue eyes is watching Matthew with yellow and purple vision. A mechanical device trundles into the light from Matthew's torch.)BLITZER: Problem solution destroy.(Matthew screams as the bullets rip through him. We see a smoking severed handland on the floor. No wonder this story was scheduled for later than usual.)

[English class]

(Clara's bored class are reading Pride and Prejudice out loud.)KELVIN: Though unheard by Lydia, was caught by Elizabeth, and as it assured herthat Darcy was not(The Doctor climbs a ladder to the open window at the back of the classroom. Claragets up from behind her desk.)KELVIN: You all right, Miss Oswald?CLARA: Yes, Kelvin, I'm fine. You carry on.KELVIN: Every feeling of displeasure against the former was so sharpened(They are on the second floor. Clara stands on a chair to talk to the Doctor.)CLARA: Can I help you, Mister Smith?

DOCTOR: Wrong.CLARA: I'm sorry?DOCTOR: On the board. Wrong. Wrong.



(The famous Jane Austen quote 1797 It is a truth universally acknowledged, that asingle man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.)CLARA: Oh, no, no, no, no. You don't do this. You are the caretaker, this is not whatyou do.DOCTOR: Just taking care.CLARA: Not your area!DOCTOR: Jane Austen wrote Pride and Prejudice in 1796.(Clara clears her throat then addresses the class.)CLARA: This is Mister Smith, the temporary caretaker, and he's a bit confused.DOCTOR: Not in 1797, because she didn't have the time. She was so busy doingallCLARA: Oh, What? I suppose she was your bezzie mate, was she? And you wenton holidays together and then you got kidnapped by Boggons from space and thenyou all formed a band and met Buddy Holly.DOCTOR: No, I read the book. There's a bio at the back.(The children giggle.)CLARA: Get down.DOCTOR: Boggons?CLARA: Go.(The school bell rings.)CLARA: Right, that's it. Well done, Kelvin. Get going. See you all in a couple ofdays. Thanks very much.KELVIN: Miss, what about our homework?CLARA: Who asks for homework? Amateur.

[School corridor]

(The Doctor is working on a junction cabinet in the courtyard garden and chattingwith Danny and another male teacher, who has floppy hair and wears a bow tie.Clara is stopped by a tall schoolboy.)TOBIAS: Miss OswaldCLARA: Hello, Tobias, can't really stop.TOBIAS: I'm in the football team against Durrants on Thursday. Sorry, but can I goearly from English Thursday afternoon?CLARA: Tobias, you can do whatever you want.

(And then the Headmaster.) ARMITAGE: Ah, Clara, can I grab a quick word?CLARA: Actually, I, er yes. ARMITAGE: Two weeks Saturday, the fete, can I put you down for tombola and theraffle? James H can't cover it now. His wife's going into hospital. Hip replacement.Constant agony. CLARA: Great. No, awful. That's terrible. Awful. I hope she'll beokay. Er, I'll do anything. Anything. Okay, bye.

[Courtyard]

COURTNEY: Miss Oswald, Katie Sharps says I pulled her hair in Biology.CLARA: Courtney, you are big enough to look after yourself. Next class, jog on, Ineed to talk to Mister Pink.



COURTNEY: Ozzie loves the Squaddie.CLARA: What was that?COURTNEY: Nothing. ADRIAN: Of course, Danny Pink here is your man, Mister Smith. Five years' militaryexperience, sergeant, here and Afghan, so electrics, boilers, if you need a hand,give him a shout.(Clara takes a watering can from a girl and uses it as an excuse to overhear theconversation.)DANNY: I, I've helped Atif with a couple of things.DOCTOR: I'm sure I won't need you, Sergeant. Fully qualified. (sparks) You bestget back to your PE class.DANNY: Oh, I teach maths.DOCTOR: Do you? What, in emergencies?DANNY: No. I'm a maths teacher. ADRIAN: Yeah, he's a maths teacher(Glass breaks.) ADRIAN: Mohammed, put that down!(He leaves.)DOCTOR: How does that work? What if the kids have questions?DANNY: About what?DOCTOR: Maths.DANNY: I answer them. I'm a maths teacher.DOCTOR: But he said you were a soldier.DANNY: Yeah. I was a soldier, now I'm a maths teacher.DOCTOR: But what about all the PE?

DANNY: I don't teach PE. I'm not a PE teacher.DOCTOR: Sorry, that seems very unlikely.CLARA: Er, excuse me. Mister Pink, I think class 9M4 are waiting.DOCTOR: Yes, you better run along, Sergeant. That ball isn't going to kick itself, isit?DANNY: I, I'm not a PE teacher, I'm a maths teacher.DOCTOR: Nope, sorry. No, I can't retain that. I've tried. It's just not going in.(Danny leaves.)CLARA: So, Pink? The name remind you of anything?DOCTOR: Yeah. The colour.

CLARA: Colonel Orson Pink? The guy we met at the end of the universe.DOCTOR: Oh, yeah. Okay, yeah. Same name, doesn't look anything like himthough.CLARA: Looks very like him.DOCTOR: Does he? I don't know. Who remembers a PE teacher?(The Doctor places a gizmo with three green lights in the the cabinet he wasworking in, then locks it up.)CLARA: Oh, never mind. What are you doing? What, what's in there?DOCTOR: So, is he here then?CLARA: Is who here?

DOCTOR: The one that you keep going on serious dates with.CLARA: If he is, are you going to start talking like a normal human being?DOCTOR: I promise I won't. I'm being nice.



CLARA: Doctor ADRIAN: Clara. Got this period free, yes?CLARA: No. Yes. ADRIAN: Great. Shakespeare.CLARA: Sorry, what, Adrian?DOCTOR: Oh, I see.CLARA: You see what?DOCTOR: Nothing. Nothing at all. ADRIAN: Excuse me. We have to talk about The Tempest.

[School corridor]

ADRIAN: In light of the changes to the sixth form Shakespeare module, blah-de-blah.CLARA: Yes, sorry, of course.(They turn and look at the Doctor, who is following them.)DOCTOR: Yes, yes, no, of course, of course, yes. Don't mind this old man. You twokids just pop off together.CLARA: Why are you talking like an idiot?DOCTOR: I'm a caretaker. Don't mind me. ADRIAN: What we have to get across, I feel, is that fascinating enigma of its not-finishedness.CLARA: Mmm, yes, good point, Ade.DOCTOR: (sotto) Oh, Clara.(The Doctor carries on taking care around the school, putting his green light gizmos

on the lights in the corridors. He sees a piece of graffiti on a window - Ozzie lovesthe Squaddie.)DOCTOR: What does that mean? Kids. What's the matter with kids today?(He wipes it off.)

[Playground]

(Another gizmo goes inside a drain grating. Part of the playground has a largechessboard painted on it, with corresponding sized pieces.)BOY [OC]: Shoot! Yes!

(A black rook is knocked over by a football.)CLARA: Hey, I said you could play chess, I did not say you could play football onthe chessboard. Jack, Morgan, come on, help me out, clear it up.(The Doctor whistles We Don't Need No Education, from Pink Floyd's The Wall.)

[Outside the Caretaker's storeroom]

DOCTOR: And one for luck.(A gizmo goes into the hanging basket by the door.)

[Caretaker's storeroom]

(Where the Tardis is parked.)



DOCTOR: Okay. Now we're in business. Let's see the lie of the land. Time to seewhat's going on.(He goes into the Tardis, and a green light floods out of it. Courtney enters thestoreroom.)COURTNEY: Hello? Oi. What are you doing? Are you in there?DOCTOR [OC]: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most dangerous of them all?(The green light goes out.)COURTNEY: There's been a spillage in Geography, I need some paper towels.(Doctor comes out of the Tardis.)DOCTOR: Can't you read?COURTNEY: Course I can read. Read what?DOCTOR: The door. It says, Keep Out.COURTNEY: No, it says, Go Away Humans.DOCTOR: Oh, so it does. Never lose your temper in the middle of a door sign.COURTNEY: What was you doing in there? What's that box?DOCTOR: The caretaker's box. Every caretaker has their own box.COURTNEY: It says Police.DOCTOR: Exactly, there's a policeman in there, in case of emergencies andchildren. Towels, there, g-g-go.COURTNEY: What was that green glow? There was a green glow coming from inthere. What was it?DOCTOR: Of course there was. What's a policeman without a death ray?(School bell.)DOCTOR: Oh, listen, there's the bell. Off you go. Haven't you got shoplifting to goto?

COURTNEY: I'm going to tell the Headmaster.DOCTOR: Oh, yes, fine. Well, cut along, you're running out of time.COURTNEY: For what?DOCTOR: Everything. Human beings have incredibly short life spans. Frankly, youshould all be in a permanent state of panic. Tick tock, tick tock.COURTNEY: You're weird.DOCTOR: Yes, I am. What about you?COURTNEY: I'm a disruptive influence.DOCTOR: Good to meet you.COURTNEY: And you.

(They shake hands.)DOCTOR: Now get lost.COURTNEY: Okay.(Courtney leaves as Clara enters.)COURTNEY: Hello, miss. Love to the Squaddie.CLARA: Sorry, what did you say? What was she doing in here?DOCTOR: Paper towels. Now, I imagine you have many questions. Fire away. Iwon't answer any of them.CLARA: What were they like?DOCTOR: What were who like?

CLARA: The others before me. Did they let you get away with this kind of thing?This school is in danger.DOCTOR: Well, it's lucky I'm here, then.



CLARA: From you.DOCTOR: Me?CLARA: You wouldn't be here if there wasn't an alien threat nearby. Your strategyfor dealing with it involves endangering this school.DOCTOR: You don't know that.CLARA: I don't know anything because you haven't told me anything, which meansI wouldn't approve, which means you are endangering this school.(The Doctor activates his sonic screwdriver and reveals a green glowing globe.)CLARA: What's that?DOCTOR: It's a scanner. I'm scanning. Why do I keep you around?CLARA: Because the alternative would be developing a conscience of your own.Scanning for what?DOCTOR: Any alien technology in this vicinity should show up. I used to have ateacher exactly like you once.CLARA: You still do. Pay attention.(The scanner displays a four legged machine which looks a wheelchair with analien sitting in it. If you have seen Falling Skies, think skitter.)CLARA: What the hell is it?DOCTOR: A Skovox Blitzer. One of the deadliest killing machines ever created.Probably homed in here because of artron emissions. You've had enough of themin this area over the years. There's enough explosive in its armoury to take out thewhole planet.(For those who don't know, time travellers absorb artron energy as they go throughthe Time Vortex, and it might be a Tardis power source - see Four to Doomsday.The Doctor's granddaughter went to Coal Hill school, and his first companions were

teachers there.)CLARA: Then leave it alone.DOCTOR: Sooner or later it will creep from its hidey-hole and some military idiot willtry to attack it.(He turns off the image.)DOCTOR: The world is full of PE teachers.

[Tardis]

CLARA: So, your insanely dangerous plan is?

(The Doctor holds up a digital wrist watch with an expanding metal bracelet.)CLARA: A new watch. Tiny bit disappointed.DOCTOR: This is a very special watch.(The Doctor puts it on, presses a button and vanishes.)CLARA: Doctor? Oi! Ow! Did you just flick my nose? You're invisible. Ha, ha! Oh,my God, that's incredible.DOCTOR [OC]: Correct. I am invisible and I am incredible. It's simply a matter ofreversing light waves. Hang on, I'm coming back.CLARA: All right, where are you?(The Doctor reappears.)

DOCTOR: So, I give the Blitzer a tiny whiff of non-threatening alien tech, I lead itback here, but I don't want it to scan me, hence invisible.CLARA: So you're, you're leading the thing here? To a school? My, my school?



DOCTOR: My school? Oh, that is telling. This is the only suitably empty place in thearea. I've set up a circle of time mines around the school. Chronodyne generators.Bit unstable.(He throws one of his little gizmos to Clara.)DOCTOR: I switch them on, the Blitzer gets sucked into a big old time vortex,billions of years into the future. It's dead easy. Tiny bit boring. I'll need a book and asandwich.CLARA: And me. You're not doing this alone.(She gives him the gizmo back.)DOCTOR: I don't need you this time. I'll see you tomorrow. We'll go somewherenice. Ancient Egypt. Crocodilopolis. They worship a big crocodile there, so thename is a useful coincidence. Go and canoodle with your boyfriend. Come on. Iwasn't born yesterday. Far from it.CLARA: You did recognise him.DOCTOR: Possibly reminded me of a certain dashing young time traveller.CLARA: Oh, of course you recognised him. I. Sorry. Stupid. I, I underestimated you.DOCTOR: It's easily done. There's a lot to estimate.CLARA: And you, you like him?DOCTOR: Yes, I like him very, very much. Go home and canoodle. Doctor's orders.Come on.CLARA: Just this once, I'm doing what I'm told.DOCTOR: Oh, sing hosanna.CLARA: Ah. So easy.

[Playground]

DANNY: Miss Oswald.CLARA: Ah, Mister, Mister Pink.DANNY: Are you still on for tonight? Cos you had your I'm about to cancel frown on.CLARA: There's a specific frown?DANNY: And I was going to say, it's okay, I might have a thing, so .CLARA: A thing?DANNY: Er, tomorrow instead?CLARA: Tomorrow's parents' evening.DANNY: Not all evening.

CLARA: No. Not all evening.(The Doctor comes out of his storeroom.)DANNY: What do you think of him?CLARA: Er, who? The caretaker?DANNY: Where did he come from? What was he before? He doesn't seem like acaretaker.CLARA: Well, he speaks very highly of you.DANNY: Anyway. Good night, Miss Oswald.CLARA: Good night, Mister Pink.

[School]

(Night. The Doctor comes out of the main doors and turns on his screwdriver.)



DOCTOR: And we're off.(As the Doctor goes in search of the Blitzer, Danny finds a little gizmo blinkinggreen underneath a fire alarm, and pulls it off. Its lights turn red.)

[Old building]

DOCTOR: Home, sweet home.


CLARA: Canoodling cancelled, if you need a hand. Doctor? You invisible? I am sogoing to confiscate that watch.

[Old building]

(The Doctor is invisible now.)DOCTOR [OC]: Where are you, my sleeping beauty?(The Blitzer activates. It cannot see its target.)DOCTOR [OC]: Gotcha. Let's dance!


CLARA: Doctor? Where are you?(She walks away, Danny arrives and knocks on the storeroom door.)DANNY: Hello?

(He spots another gizmo, this time blinking red, in the hanging basket, and takes it.)

[Alleyway]

(The Skovox Blitzer is following the invisible Doctor's infrared footprints.)BLITZER: Nine stop query rescan. Target reacquired success success.

[School]

DOCTOR [OC]: Come on, come on, come on.

(The doors burst open.)DOCTOR [OC]: Gangway! Not far now. Come on.BLITZER: Nine stop parsing data pursue.DOCTOR [OC]: Bingo.BLITZER: Target reacquired.(It trundles off as Danny enters.)DANNY: Hello?

[School hall]

(The Doctor turns off the invisibility watch and sees that the gizmos on the circle ofchairs are not flashing green.)DOCTOR: What? Red? Red. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no!



(The Blitzer enters.)BLITZER: Range one point four nine scan complete problem problem.DOCTOR: Listen. I'm unarmed. I'm peaceful. Don't you understand? I, I know thatyou shouldn't be on this planet but I can help you with that. IBLITZER: Problem solution destroy.DANNY: I want a word with you.DOCTOR: Get back!(The Blitzer turns on Danny.)BLITZER: Problem solution destroy.(The Blitzer starts shooting, Danny ducks and throws himself to the floor. droppingthe chronodyne gizmo. It slides into the circle of chairs and turns green. Then hepicks up a chair to attack the Blitzer.)DANNY: No! Get away from me!(The Doctor uses his screwdriver. The chair is sucked into a vortex that he creates.The Blitzer is also sucked towards it, as is Danny.)BLITZER: Temporal disrupt. Warning warning. Temporal failure.(Clara enters and runs to grab Danny.)CLARA: No! No, no, no, no! Doctor, stop! Doctor!BLITZER: Warning system failure. Abort. Abort.(The Blitzer goes into the golden vortex, and the Doctor turns it off. Then he spotsthe gizmo that Danny dropped and picks it up.)DOCTOR: (sarcastic) Oh, oh, well done, PE, brilliant work. What's this? Achronodyne generator? I'll just deactivate that, shall I? I've got a swimmingcertificate so that qualifies me to meddle with higher technology. Never mind thatsome people are actually trying to save the planet. Oh, no. There's only room in my

head for cross-country and the offside rule.CLARA: Danny, what are you doing here?DANNY: I was checking up on him. He's been up to something, fiddling with theelectric, but what the? No. What? Did you see that thing? Tell me you saw thatthing.CLARA: I saw the thing, yeah. Doctor, are we safe? Is the planet safe? It's gone?DOCTOR: Yes, yes, yes, yes, for the moment. But the thing is, you see, thechronodyne generators have to be precisely aligned to generate the vortex. But thesergeant here, he went and moved one.CLARA: But the chronodyne worked. It's gone.

(The Doctor measures with his screwdriver while Danny looks at a burning hole inthe middle of a load of stacked chairs in the far corner.)DOCTOR: But not far enough. The vortex will open here again, but not in a billionyears.CLARA: Then when?DOCTOR: Er, seventy four hours. Three days? Three days to think of somethingnew because now it knows what to expect. Now it has scanned me and it will killme on sight, thanks to PE here.DANNY: Clara, why are you talking to him like that? Why are you using words likechronodyne? Was that thing a space thing? Oh. Oh, my God, you're from space.

You're a spacewoman. You said you were from Blackpool.(The Doctor is writing in a notebook.)CLARA: It's a play! For the summer fete.



DOCTOR: It's a what?CLARA: Yes, it's a play. Shut up, it is a play. We are rehearsing a play. Shh, shh,shh, shh. A surprise play. And, er, you see, the vortex thing is, is a lighting effect.Very clever. And that thing is, is one of the kids. In fancy dress. Really, really goodfancy dress.DANNY: How stupid do you think I am?DOCTOR: I'm willing to put a number on it.DANNY: I'm not a moron, Clara. And he's not the caretaker. He's your dad. Yourspace dad.DOCTOR: Oh, genius. That is, that is really, really brilliant reasoning. How can youthink that I'm her dad when we both look exactly the same age?CLARA: We do not look the same age.DOCTOR: I was being kind. Right, I'm going to hypnotise him. I'm going to erasehis memory.CLARA: Doctor, stop!DOCTOR: Tiny little brain, only take a moment.CLARA: He's my boyfriend.DOCTOR: Well, I'll try not to erase the whole thing. I'll leave the bits that.CLARA: He's my boyfriend. I thought you'd figured this out.DOCTOR: Him?CLARA: Yes, him.DOCTOR: No, he's not.CLARA: Yes, he is.DANNY: Yes, I am.DOCTOR: But he's a PE teacher. You wouldn't go out with a PE teacher. It's a

mistake. You've made a boyfriend error.DANNY: I am not a PE teacher. I am a maths teacher.DOCTOR: You're a soldier. Why would you go out with a soldier? Why not get adog or a big plant?CLARA: Because I love him!DOCTOR: Why would you say that? Is this part of the surprise play?CLARA: (sigh) There is no surprise play.DOCTOR: Oh, it's a roller coaster with you tonight, isn't it? What about thehandsome one, the one with the bow tie?CLARA: Who? Adrian? No, no, no. He's just a friend and not my type.

DANNY: Clara, are you going to explain any of this? Who is this guy?CLARA: The Doctor isDOCTOR: Go on.DANNY: Yes, explain. Who is he? Why have you never mentioned him?CLARA: Because he's an alien.DANNY: Er, are you an alien?CLARA: No, no, no, I'm still from Blackpool. Me and the Doctor, we travel throughtime and space.DOCTOR: Exhibit A.(The Doctor pulls the curtains back on the stage.)

CLARA: It's called a Tardis, but it's disguised as an old police phone box.(She gets on stage and the Doctor feeds her the next line.)DOCTOR: (sotto) It's bigger on the inside.



CLARA: And it's bigger on the inside than the outside.(The Doctor opens the Tardis doors.)DOCTOR: Voila.CLARA: And we travel the universe in it.(Danny leans in and looks around, then at the outside, and the inside again.)DANNY: And what about that thing? Did you bring that here?DOCTOR: No. I'm going to protect you from that thing.DANNY: You said it was coming back.DOCTOR: Yes, it is coming back, thanks to you.DANNY: This is a school. We have to evacuate, call the Army.DOCTOR: And that is the most dangerous thing right there.(The Doctor closes the Tardis doors.)DOCTOR: Are you sure hypnotising's not on the menu?CLARA: Yes.DANNY: But we need to get help. This is an emergency.DOCTOR: Look, take him away. Shut him up, shut him down. Up or down, it doesn'tmatter to me. I've got a lot of work to do. Again.CLARA: Will you be okay?DOCTOR: Why wouldn't I be okay? I was fine till you two blundered in.DANNY: Am I just being ignored?(Clara has to help the bewildered Danny down the stairs from the stage.)CLARA: Come on, Danny. It's all right, it's. Come on, it's all fine. You'll be okay.Let's er, get those legs moving. That's it, down those stairs. Yep, that's it. This canall be explained and everything will be fine.DOCTOR: And when this is all over, you can finish the job.

CLARA: How do you mean?DOCTOR: Well, you've explained me to him. You haven't explained him to me.

[Danny's flat]

CLARA: What do you think? Say something.DANNY: So, there's an alien, that used to look like Adrian. Then he turned into aScottish caretaker and every now and then, when I'm not looking, you elope withhim.CLARA: I don't elope.

DANNY: Do you love him?CLARA: No.DANNY: Really had enough of the lies.CLARA: Not in that way.DANNY: What other way is there?CLARA: You know what I mean.DANNY: I don't know what you mean. I know what you tell me, which isn't alwaysthe truth.CLARA: DannyDANNY: Why do you do it? Why do you fly off in the box with him? The truth.

Please, just this once.CLARA: Because it's amazing. Because I see wonders.DANNY: Okay.



CLARA: What are you thinking?DANNY: That's a good question. It's funny, you only really know what someonethinks of you when you know what lies they've told you. I mean, you say you'veseen wonders, you've seen amazing things, and you kept them secret from me. Sowhat do you think of me, Clara?CLARA: Please, tell me how I fix this.DANNY: I just want to know who you are.CLARA: You know who I am.DANNY: When you're with him. When you're with the Doctor.


(Clara comes out with the invisibility watch.)CLARA: (sotto) Okay, I think we've just got time before parents' evening.DANNY: An invisibility watch? Not even a ring.(Danny puts it on.)CLARA: Press the button on the side, you're invisible. You'll see me with the Doctor,the other me. The exactly the same other me. Okay?

[Tardis]

(The Doctor is building a contraption.)DOCTOR: Afternoon. Thanks for keeping out of my way. You haven't brought Davewith you, I hope.CLARA: His name's Danny. And no, I haven't. I've er, I explained it all to him. He

gets it. He took it really well.DOCTOR: Pass me that synestic.CLARA: So, when the Blitzer comes back, are you going to catch him with that?DOCTOR: It'll be a long, fiddly job. It's going to take me at least twenty four hours.Even longer if people keep talking to me, so do keep going.CLARA: If it comes back Thursday night, are you sure about that? Cos you said thechronodyne is unstable.DOCTOR: If you want bother someone, go and bother PE.CLARA: He's a maths teacher.DOCTOR: That's a shame, I like maths.

CLARA: Not a soldier.DOCTOR: Interesting.CLARA: What is?DOCTOR: I'm bored. Let's go somewhere fun. What do you say? Do you want tosee the Thames frozen over? Oh, those frost fairs.(The Doctor goes around the console, setting controls. Clara follows, returningthem to neutral.)CLARA: But you can't. The Skovox thing.DOCTOR: It's a time machine. We can get back straightaway, like we always do onyour dates. Just make sure you don't get yourself a tan or anything, or lose a limb.

CLARA: I don't think we should, not this time.DOCTOR: You've never said no before. Not even in the middle of dinner.Remember when you had to eat two meals in a row?



CLARA: I just think, with the school in danger(Danny turns off the watch.)CLARA: Danny, why are you?DANNY: He already knows I'm here. That's why he's talking like that. He's beingclever.DOCTOR: Now you mention it, being a Time Lord, I can feel a light shield aurawhen it's right next to me.DANNY: Oh ho, ho. Time Lord? Might have known.DOCTOR: Might have known what?DANNY: Well, the accent's good, but you can always spot the aristocracy. It's in the,the attitude.CLARA: Danny.DANNY: Now, Time Lords, do you salute those?DOCTOR: Definitely not.DANNY: Ah. Sir!(Danny salutes.)DOCTOR: And you do not call me sir.DANNY: As you wish, sir. Absolutely, sir.DOCTOR: And you can get out of my Tardis!DANNY: Immediately, sir.CLARA: Doctor, this is stupid, this is unfair.DANNY: One thing, Clara. I'm a soldier, guilty as charged. You see him? He's anofficer.DOCTOR: I am not an officer!DANNY: I'm the one who carries you out of the fire. He's the one who lights it.

DOCTOR: Out. Now.DANNY: Right away, sir. Straight now?DOCTOR: Yes.DANNY: Am I dismissed?DOCTOR: Yes, you are!DANNY: That's him. Look at him, right now. That's who he is.(Danny leaves.)DOCTOR: On balance, I think that went quite well.


CLARA: Danny, it's not time to go home yet. It's parents' evening.(Clara leaves.)DOCTOR: Humans. I never learn.COURTNEY: What's in the box? It's not really a policeman, is it?DOCTOR: You want to know what's in that box? I'll tell you what's in that box. It's atime machine. It also travels in space. And it usually contains a man who just wantsto get on with his work of preventing the end of the world, but keeps beinginterrupted by boring little humans.COURTNEY: Cool. So, that's really a spaceship?

(The Doctor pulls Courtney back from the Tardis by her collar.)DOCTOR: I'm serious. I'm trying to save this planet.COURTNEY: End of the world for me tonight, whatever you do. Parents' evening.



DOCTOR: Is your name really Disruptive Influence?COURTNEY: Courtney Woods. Can I go in space?DOCTOR: I'll let you know. I may have a vacancy. But not right now.(He hustles Courtney out.)DOCTOR: Two days. I can do it.

[Gymnasium]

(The teachers are laying out their tables.) ARMITAGE: Right, are we quorate? Time to admit the hordes. And look who's atthe front of the queue. ADRIAN: Who are they?CLARA: Courtney Woods' mum and dad. ADRIAN: Can someone else do them first?DANNY: No problem, Ade. I can cope with anything tonight. ARMITAGE: Oh, happy days.(He opens the doors and lets the parents in. Meanwhile, in the School Theatre, agolden vortex appears and a chair is thrown out.)

[Tardis]

(The Doctor carrying his tool box when the scanner beeps.)DOCTOR: No, no, no. No! No, no, no, no, no!(He grabs his ghostbusters backpack and runs out.)

[Gymnasium]

DANNY: I would say yes, I'm afraid Courtney is a disruptive influence.MR WOODS: Yeah, but last year you said she was a very disruptive influence.MRS WOODS: So, I suppose that counts as an improvement.(Danny spots the Doctor at the doors, and does a loud Ahem! Clara looks up andsees the Doctor gesturing to them.)DANNY: Excuse me, I think the caretaker wants me.CLARA: Sorry, Mrs Christodolou, I think er, I think the caretaker wants me too.MRS CHRISTOPHOLOU: But what about my Angelina?

CLARA: Yeah, she's great, yeah, a really great girl, A plus, ten out of ten, top of theclass. Sorry. Although, actually, handwriting could be better.(Danny and Clara run out.) ARMITAGE: I'm sure they'll be back in a moment.MRS WOODS: Looks like our Courtney was right about those two.

[Playground]

CLARA: What's happening?DOCTOR: Clara, the vortex is opening.

DANNY: You said Thursday night. Right, hall, quick.DOCTOR: PE, shut up. Clara, it'll scan the area. If it gets to parents' evening, it'll killthem all.



DANNY: We've got to evacuate.DOCTOR: Shut up!CLARA: Quickly. What do I do?DOCTOR: It'll be here any second. Get to the hall.(He gives her the sonic screwdriver.)DOCTOR: Give it some squirts of helicon energy, setting number forty one. Nomore than three seconds each, random pulses. Distract it, then you lead it awayfrom the hall, give me two minutes.CLARA: Then what?DOCTOR: Just run straight to the Tardis.DANNY: But your gadget isn't ready yet. Twenty four hours, you said.DOCTOR: Yes, well, I've revised that down to two minutes. Probably. Clara, go.CLARA: On my way.DANNY: You're using her like a decoy?DOCTOR: No, not like a decoy. As a decoy. Don't they teach you anything at stupidschool?DANNY: Well, is there anything I can do?DOCTOR: Yes. Yes, and this is very, very important. Leave us alone!

[School hall]

(Clara looks into see the Blitzer in the vortex.)BLITZER: Disrupt temporal lock. Disengaged scan.CLARA: Here we go.(She waves the sonic screwdriver.)

BLITZER: Incoming stop identified Helicon Helicon commence retargeting.(It chases Clara.)

[Corridor]

(Danny sees Clara run past the top of the corridor.)BLITZER [OC]: Target acquired. Destroy.(Then it trundles past.)

[Playground]

(Clara squirts more Helicon.)BLITZER: Target within range.(She runs into the Caretaker's storeroom)BLITZER: Problem solution destroy.(It destroys the door.)


BLITZER: Destroy. Destroy.

CLARA: Doctor, now! It's got to be now!DOCTOR: Twenty seconds.BLITZER: Destroy. Destroy.



CLARA: Doctor!(Clara dodges the weapons fire and helps the Doctor on with the backpack.)DOCTOR: Am I green? Am I green?CLARA: You're green!(The Doctor uses a commentator's microphone to talk to the Blitzer via thebackpack. You know, the ones with the bar that the speaker rests against theirupper lip to keep it at the correct distance whilst close enough not to pick upsurrounding sound.)DOCTOR: Stop! Skovox Blitzer!BLITZER: Awaiting orders.DOCTOR: Superior Skovox Artificer. Analyse stop analyse stop.BLITZER: Superior recognised. Pattern one one oh, Orders orders.CLARA: Why's it listening to you?DOCTOR: Listening to its superior. This is a rough copy. It thinks I'm its general.Initiate input. Commence shutdown protocol. No conflict. Conclusion?BLITZER: Problem solution.DOCTOR: Conclusion.BLITZER: Final input code missing. Emergency terminate. Initiate self-destruct innine eight(The Blitzer's eyes turn from blue to red.)DOCTOR: The input code. I forgot the final input code.(He stabs frantically at a keypad.)BLITZER: Seven six fiveCLARA: Do it now!DOCTOR: I need time. Distract it, Clara!

CLARA: Me? What can I do?BLITZER: Three two one.DANNY [OC]: Oi, Skovox. Over here.(Danny turns off the invisibility watch, then runs and somersaults over the Blitzer.)BLITZER: Under attack.DOCTOR: Artificer Artificer. Stop. Confirm stop override final input code.BLITZER: Code accepted. Abort self-destruct. Orders accepted Stop stop stop.(The Blitzer powers off. Clara hugs Danny.)CLARA: Oh, my God! Oh, my God, you were amazing! Oh, my God, you were sobrilliant.

DANNY: Well, yeah, I was okay, wasn't I? I was behind you every step of the way.Had to make sure you were safe. (to the Doctor) You okay?DOCTOR: Okay.CLARA: Just okay?DANNY: It's all right, it doesn't matter. I don't need him to like me. It doesn't matter ifhe likes me or hates me, I just need to do exactly one thing for you. Doctor, am Iright?DOCTOR: Yes.CLARA: What? What one thing?DANNY: I need to be good enough for you. That's why he's angry. Just in case I'm

not.CLARA: He, er, he did just save the whole world.DOCTOR: Yeah, yeah. Good start.



[Space]

(The Blitzer is cast adrift from the Tardis, micro-meteorites bouncing off its metalsurface.)DOCTOR [OC]: Farewell, Skovox Blitzer. Have a nice war. So, Courtney Woods,impressed yet?

[Tardis]

(The doors are open, and Courtney is holding on to the doorframe for dear life.)COURTNEY: Actually, I'm feeling a bit ill.DOCTOR: Ah, it can be a bit overwhelming. But look. The Olveron Cluster. A millionstars, a hundred million inhabited planets.(Courtney gags and runs inside. Sounds of an unfortunate occurrence.)DOCTOR: Ah, yes. There has been a spillage.

[Danny's flat]

(Snuggling on the sofa in front of the television.)CLARA: So, what do you think of him now?DANNY: Of the Doctor?CLARA: Yeah. See, he's all right, isn't he, really, underneath it all.(She turns the television off with the remote.)CLARA: Okay. Tell me what you're thinking.

DANNY: I know men like him. I've served under them. They push you and makeyou stronger, till you're doing things you never thought you could. I saw you tonight.You did exactly what he told you. You weren't even scared. And you should havebeen.CLARA: I trust him. He's never let me down.DANNY: Fine. If he ever pushes you too far, I want you to tell me, because I knowwhat that's like. You'll tell me if that happens, yeah?CLARA: Yeah, it's a deal.DANNY: No. It's a promise.CLARA: Okay. I promise.

DANNY: And if you break that promise, Clara, we're finished.CLARA: Don't say that.DANNY: I'm saying it because if you don't tell me the truth, I can't help you. And Icould never stand not being able to help you. We clear?CLARA: Yes. We're clear.(They snuggle down again and she turns the television back on.)

[White corridor]

(The late CSO is sitting across a desk from a man in a pale grey suit.)

MATTHEW: It was mad. It was like in a film or on the telly like, with science fictionguns.



SEB: Skovox Blitzer, sounds like. We've had a few in from that. Wouldn't feel toobad.MATTHEW: If I hadn't. If I hadn't. Hang on. That doesn't make sense.SEB: Makes perfect sense to me.MATTHEW: How did I escape? I, I don't remember how I got away.SEB: Well, I was coming to that. I'm afraid you really rather didn't.(Matthew stands up and looks around.)MATTHEW: Then how did I get here?SEB: Well. Big question.MATTHEW: Where am I?SEB: What name would you like? There's a range. The afterlife. The PromisedLand. I'm partial to the Nethersphere.(Matthew goes to the circular window behind Seb and looks through the blinds.)MATTHEW: My God.(Missy, the Edwardian lady, walks into the corridor, looks at them then walks away.)SEB: Sorry, she's a bit er, busy today. So, any questions?

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