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Emotional Intelligence
Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is your ability to recognize & understand emotions in yourself and others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships.
Is this useful to know?
Emotional Intelligence
• Emotional intelligence is the “something” in each of us that is a bit intangible.
• It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions that achieve positive results.
People are a Mix of Things
• Intelligence/IQ – Our Ability to Learn
• Personality – Extrovert, introvert, optimistic, pessimistic, big picture thinker, detail person etc.
• Emotional Intelligence – self awareness, self management, social awareness, relationship management.
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Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
• Perceiving Emotions
• Understanding Emotions
• Facilitating Emotions
• Managing Emotions
Emotional intelligence is commonly defined by
four attributes:
Emotional (Self) awareness
Social
awareness
Relationship management
The ability to understand your
emotions as well as recognize their
impact on relationships & performance
Your ability to identify emotions in other people &
to understand their perspective & take an interest in their
concerns
Controlling your emotions & using your awareness of them to stay flexible & act
positively
Your ability to use your awareness of
your own emotions together with your understanding of the emotions of
others to manage emotions
successfully
Emotional Self-management
Self Awareness
The ability to be aware of one’s thoughts and feelings and to articulate them • Realistic self-confidence: You understand your own strengths
and limitations; you operate from competence and know when to rely on someone else.
• Emotional insight: You understand your feelings. Being aware of what makes you angry, for instance, can help you manage that anger.
Self Awareness
• Be aware of how your actions impact your those around you. • Be open; self-disclosure. • Take time to self-reflect and take corrective actions where necessary. • Work with a coach/mentor to help you address areas of weakness. • Be intensely curious. • Ask for feedback.
Social Awareness Caring about what others are going through and being able to imagine what it must be like in their shoes
• Cognitive and emotional empathy: Because you understand other
perspectives, you can put things in ways colleagues comprehend. And you welcome their questions, just to be sure.
• Good listening: You pay full attention to the other person and take time to understand what they are saying, without talking over them or hijacking the agenda.
Social Awareness Understand without necessarily agreeing with
another’s position.
Understand your coworkers emotions, needs and concerns and how these could be affecting engagement.
Demonstrate empathy by:
o Listening without interruption o Asking thoughtful questions o Being curious and interested in their story o Validating what you are hearing o Suspending judgment o Showing compassion
Self Management
The ability to control impulses and channel heightened emotions when dealing with difficult situations
• Resilience: The ability to control your emotions and behavior and adapt to changing circumstances.
• Emotional balance: You keep any distressful feelings in check — instead of blowing up at people. Stay composed, positive, and unflappable even in trying moments;
• Self-motivation: You keep moving toward distant goals despite setbacks.
Self Management
• Recognize emotional triggers.
• Understand where your emotions are coming from and why.
• Think clearly and stay focused under pressure.
• Verbalize how you feel and make requests of others.
Relationship Management
Communicating effectively and encouraging diverse perspectives
• Compelling communication: You put your points in persuasive, clear ways.
• Team playing: People feel relaxed working with you. One sign: They laugh easily around you.
Relationship Management
• Develop relationships to help you recognize signs of decreased engagement.
• Diffuse conflict and interpersonal tensions.
• Be a positive influence.
• Inspire and help developing others.
• May use humor and play to relieve stress.
Personal Competence
Social Competence
Self Awareness
Relationship Management
Self Management
Social Awareness
4 Core Emotional Intelligence Skills
What I See What I Do
Takeaway's
• IQ , EQ , and personality all play into defining your abilities
• Emotional Intelligence is our ability to recognize and understand emotions in ourselves and in others and it impacts most everything you do and say each day.
• Knowing & managing one’s internal states is vital
• Awareness of others feelings is vital
• The ability to induce others to desirable outcomes is key to leadership
Our Emotions
We’re all human, we have emotions
• Happy
• Sad
• Angry
• Afraid
• Ashamed
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Happy
Sad Angry
Afraid Ashamed
Happy
Sad Angry
Afraid
Ashamed
Some Days Most Days
Our Emotions Our Emotions Have Both Triggers and Range
• Depending on each of our personal histories and experience there are a variety of trigger points that cause an emotional reaction within us.
• Understanding what triggers your emotions can help you develop habits that will improve your emotional intelligence.
• Our emotions can range from relatively mild to extreme
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Understanding Emotion By improving our ability to recognize and understand our emotions we can do a much better job…. • Managing our behavior
• Managing our social interactions
• Making personal decisions, and
• Getting better results
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How to improve your
Emotional Intelligence (EI)
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Strategies to Improve
• Not only can Emotional Intelligence be improved, it can be continually improved throughout your lifetime.
• We all have emotional intelligence, but like all skills we are better at some areas than others
• Try to focus on one area to that the assessment that caused you to go hmmm….
• As time and improvement go on, test yourself again to focus on the next area needing the most improvement
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What can I do to improve my Emotional Intelligence?
To Improve your Self Awareness:
• Stop judging your feelings.
• Feel your feelings when they are present for you: happiness, sadness, anger, fear or shame.
• Keep a journal about your feelings and emotions.
• Know and practice your core values.
• Have healthy boundaries with others.
• Have a support system who gives you honest feedback.
Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management
What can I do to improve my Emotional Intelligence?
To Improve your Self Management:
• Write your goals down and share them with others.
• Wait 10 seconds before responding to something that may negatively trigger you.
• Sleep on it. • Smile and laugh more. • Do a joy filled activity at least once a day. • Accept every difficult situation as an opportunity
to learn a life lesson.
Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management
What can I do to improve my Emotional Intelligence?
To Improve your Social Awareness:
• Greet people by name. • Practice reflective listening in your conversations and focus on the
other person. • Ask open ended questions to create a greater dialog. • Look for opportunities to praise someone. Catch them doing
something right. • Watch body language of others. • Be present with whomever you are with. Give them your attention. • Pay attention to the EQ of others around you. • Use your intuition to sense the social culture around you.
Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management
What can I do to improve my Emotional Intelligence?
To Improve your Relationship Management:
• Be open about yourself and be curious about others.
• Enhance your natural communication style
• Learn how to receive feedback positively.
• Build Trust.
• Acknowledge the other person’s feelings.
• Take responsibility for your part in the relationship.
• When you care, show it.
• Explain your decisions, don’t just make them.
• Make your feedback direct and constructive.
Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management
“The one thing you can’t take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to
me.
The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance.”
Viktor E. Frankl
Hope your EQ improved and continues to improve
